SAD SONG OF A GAY TEEN 21!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

This story is copyright 2006 by yours truly, Paul Walker. You may not copy or post it to any other website without my permission. All the characters are entirely fictional and any resemblance to people, either living or otherwise is pure coincidence. The story contains acts of a sexual nature between teen males and if this offends you, then leave now. If you are under the legal age to be reading this in your territory, then leave now or it's your problem.

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You can also check out my music page at http://www.soundlift.com/BRAINCHIPS

From the previous chapter!!!!!!!!!!!

Nick reappeared in the kitchen and informed us that Liam was sleeping and that he had to call his parents to let them know what was happening. Dad told Nick to use the phone in his office. Nick returned and told us that his dad had said he could stay the night if it was ok with us. Dad said it was ok as Liam was going to need his friends around him now. We had been sitting at the table for about ten minutes when Liam came rushing down the stairs screaming, “ Nick, Nick!!!! Nick has left me now as well.” The look of sheer terror and panic in his eyes was really scary.

Nick got up and went over to Liam and put his arms around him and said, “ it's ok babe, I'm here. I just had to call home while you were asleep. I'm not going anywhere. My dad said I can stay the night. Would you like me to?”

“ Yes,” was all Liam could say in reply.

By now, it was getting on for six o'clock. No one had really thought about what we were going to have for dinner, so Jamie offered to go and get some take away pizza. I don't think any of us felt hungry but we had to eat something. The rest of the evening we just sat round, grieving in our way. Finally, at around ten, we all started to drift off to bed.

SAD SONG OF A GAY TEEN 21 !!!!!!!!!!!!!

I'm not sure how long I had been asleep before I awoke screaming, “ mum, mum, Jamie, Jamie, mum !!!!!!!”

The light almost blinded me when it was turned on by whoever entered the room first. I heard mum ask, “ What's wrong, Jason?”

Jamie asked me the same question and by now Gary was waking up and asking what time it was. I had sweat rolling off my body one minute and the next I would be shivering. “ I had a really bad dream,” I said, in a really week voice.

“ Do you want to talk about it?” Jamie asked.

“ Uh, uh,” I said. “ Can I go and get something to drink?”

Mum gave her approval but I wanted both of them to come with me because I felt so frightened. When we got to the kitchen, Jamie poured four glasses of milk, due to the fact that Gary was now awake and had followed us down. He was always so protective of me. I told everyone that I had this really bad dream where I woke up and there was no one in the house. They had all gone. I went to my grandparents and Carols houses and they were gone too. I went to school and there was no one there either, none of my friends, no one at all. I was scared. I couldn't find any of the people who I cared about and loved. The people who I could find just thought I was really crazy and wouldn't help me.

By now I had tears running down my face. First I looked at mum and then at Gary and asked, “ you won't leave me will you?”

It took them both awhile but they finally assured me that they wouldn't leave me. I finally went back to bed and fell asleep wrapped in the safety and security of Garys arms.

When I went down for breakfast, I was surprised to see Jenny sitting at the table. Mum had obviously called her after I woke up last night. I felt that it would be a good idea to talk to her. I went over what I had told mum, Jamie and Gary. Jenny said that it was just a part of my reaction to the news about Anne. She asked me about Anne and if I had become attached to her. I told Jenny that I had and that I looked upon Anne as an aunty, as I'd never had any auntys or none that I knew about. It took a while but Jenny convinced me that I was just feeling insecure and that nothing bad was going to happen for a very long time. I'm not too sure how much I believed it but I didn't feel too bad once I had talked to her.

Liam entered the kitchen and said that he had his stuff ready for when they came to get him.

“ When who comes to get you?” I asked.

“ Social services. I guess now that mum has gone, I'm gonna have to go and live with some strangers, a foster family, I'm gonna hate it. I really like it here,” Liam said in response to my question. By now he was crying again.

Dad had entered the kitchen and heard what Liam said. Dad pulled up a chair next to Liam and said, “ there are a few things we need to talk about.”

There was silence for a moment before dad spoke again, “ two days after your mum went into hospital, she asked to see a solicitor who specialised in family law. To cut along story short, she wanted to make sure that if anything did happen to her you would be taken care of. How would you like to stay with us?”

“ You mean it? You mean I really get to stay here with you guys?” Liam asked. He was smiling, which was good to see. It was the first time that he had smiled in almost twenty four hours.

“ It's what your mum wanted and I hope it's what you want,” dad said.

“ I'm sure it's what I want. I didn't want to end up living with strangers and maybe having to go another school,” Liam said before rushing to give dad a hug. He then added, “ I better go and get ready for school.”

All the time that dad and Liam had been talking, Jenny had just sat and observed the conversation. As Liam raced out of the room, Jenny grabbed a hold of him and asked, “ Liam do you remember what happened yesterday?”

“ My mum died.” He said. There was a moments pause before Liam asked, “ Jenny, how am I supposed to feel?” There was real sadness in his eyes when he asked that.

“ That's difficult to answer. You may be better talking to Jason about that, as he is the one who has been through all this already. How do you feel?” Jenny asked.

“ Hurt, confused, upset, angry. I want to cry all the time but I feel stupid when I do. I feel that it makes me look weak. I feel a lot of different things and none it feels right?” Liam responded.

“ Those are all the things I felt when my parents died,” I said. “ It's ok to cry. It shows you have feelings and emotions.”

By now Liam was crying again. He came up to me and said, very quietly, “ thanks for being here. If I hadn't met you and this had happened, I don't know what I would have done.”

I just let him sit and cry. I knew he was grieving for his mum.

Dad came over and sat next to us and asked Liam, “ Do you really feel like going to school? You know you don't have to if you don't want to.”

“ Thank you,” Liam said. “ I don't think I would be able to concentrate properly anyway.”

By now Gary and Nick were ready to leave for school. I gave Gary a kiss and told him to explain to our friends what was going on and that maybe we would be able to see them at the weekend. Liam gave Nick a kiss and thanked him for staying the night. Nick said he would drop by after school.

The rest of the morning, Liam and I just sat around, looking at his photo album and listening to songs that had been his mums favourites. We cried when we felt like it and at other times, especially when looking at the photos, we would laugh. Especially if we looked at a photo of something that brought back some happy memories.

I did have a panic attack when mum said she had to go out and pick up the medication that Jenny had prescribed for us. It was just something that would help us to sleep. Of course, as mum was leaving, I ran up to her and pleaded, “ mum, please come back. Don't leave me. Please?”

Mum leaned down and said, “ I will be no more than thirty minutes. I will be back. Would you like me to get some cream and marshmallows and then I can make you some of my hot chocolate?”

I stood in thought for a moment before saying, “ I'd really like that. Would you make one for Liam too?”

“ Of course I will,” she said as she kissed my forehead before leaving.

All the time she was gone, I just sat and stared out of the window and waited for her to return. It was a huge relieve when I saw the car pulling into the drive .

As we sat and drank our hot chocolate, Liam asked, “ can I go and see her?”

“ Go and see who?” Asked mum.

“ My mum. I'd like to say goodbye to her,” Liam replied.

Mum had to sit and think about this for a while before I chipped in by saying, “ It may be a good Idea, I never got to do that. Would you do it for Liam, please?”

“ Ok. I'll get Phil to call the funeral home and see when we can go,” mum said after what seemed like aeons.

At first dad wasn't too sure that it was a good idea for Liam to go and see his mum but after Liam had spent a few minutes pleading with dad and saying that it was important for him to be able to say goodbye to his mum, dad relented and went to make the arrangements. We would be going to visit the funeral home the following afternoon at two o'clock.

After lunch, Liam remembered that he hadn't called his old neighbour, John, to give him the sad news. Mum and dad both offered to do it but Liam assured them that he could handle it. They talked for ages and the only brief pause in the call was when Liam asked for the address of the funeral home, as John wanted to meet us there to pay is respects to Anne.

By four o'clock, I was pacing the floor waiting for Gary to arrive home. It was a relief when I saw him getting out of the car, followed by Chris and Steve. I opened the door and just shook my head, indicating to my friends that I really didn't want them to visit now. I didn't want to offend them but right now I just wanted to be with my family. They got the message and got back in the car. I would call them later and explain why I had done what I just did.

After getting changed and grabbing a can of coke from the fridge, Gary came back into the lounge. “ I noticed the salmon and shellfish in the fridge. I assume we were going to have it with pasta?”

“ That's what we were going to have for dinner last night,” Mum said. “ But I didn't feel like cooking after what happened.”

“ Well I'll cook dinner. I haven't cooked in a while, so I better make sure I still have my touch,” Gary said with a smile.

Liam looked a little surprised when Gary said he was going to cook. That is, until I said, “ wanna go to McDonald s? There will be less chance of getting food poisoning.”

Gary picked up a cushion and threw it at me, before saying, “ my cooking is fantastic and you know it.” With that he left the room and went to start cooking dinner.

“ Does Gary really cook?” Liam asked.

“ Yes he does and he is really good too,” I responded in answer to Liams question.

Nick called to see Liam,like he said he would. Mum invited him to stay for dinner but he said he couldn't. Liam and Nick went to Liams room and when they returned half an hour later, Liam looked like the cat who had got the cream. I had a good Idea what they had been up to and I knew Liam had enjoyed the 'cream'. I also called Chris and Steve and they were really understanding about how I had reacted. I explained to them that Annes death had brought back a lot of bad memories. I asked them to come and spend the day on Saturday, so that we could practice some of the stuff that we had written for the new album that we would be recording in the summer. I explained to them that it would be good to keep Liam busy and help him understand that he had to get on with his life. It was probably what his mum would have wanted.

Before he left, Nick gave us a data CD, saying that some of the teachers had sent some work for us to do so that we didn't get too far behind. He did tell us that they had all said there was no great pressure for us to actually do the work but it might help if we kept ourselves occupied.

Dinner was absolutely fantastic, although Liam decided that he would try and wined Gary up by saying, “ Are you sure I won't get food poisoning? It tastes a bit funny.”

Gary looked really hurt by this comment until Liam added, “ hey, I was only joking, it was fantastic.”

This soon changed Garys mood. He cleared the table and then served the apple pie that he had made. After dinner, Liam and I went up to my studio and played for a while. It felt good to be doing something normal. After finishing his homework, Gary came up to the studio with some hot chocolate. It didn't have any marshmallows in it. Mum had bought a large bag but Liam and I had eaten them during the afternoon.

I took my drink from Gary and said, “ hey, you forgot the marshmallows.”

“ There were none left. Mum said something about two fat pigs eating them,” Gary said.

Liam and I just laughed when he said that. Gary looked at us for a moment before asking, “ so how are you guys doing?”

“ I feel better after talking to Jenny. That dream last night was so real. I was really scared that everyone who cares about me, everyone who loves me, was just going to leave me. I was frightened that I would be all on my own,” I told Gary. “ And sorry I woke you up.”

Gary came over and sat next to me. He put his arms around me and said, “ None of us are planing to leave you any time soon. You do believe that, don't you?”

“ Yes,” I replied.

“ As for me,” Liam began, “ this is the one thing that I always feared more than anything. I know mum isn't suffering any more now, so in a way, that's quite comforting. It's still hard to believe that I won't see her again. That's why I need to go to the funeral home, doing that will make it real for me. I'm really glad I got to know you guys and that I can stay here.”

Liam then came and gave both Gary and I a kiss on the cheek. I knew it would take sometime but Liam would get through this. We finally decided to hit the sack but not before mum dished out the medication that Jenny had prescribed for us. I slept like a log and so did Liam, as I was to find out over breakfast the next morning.

The two of us spent the morning doing some of the school work that had been sent for us. It was good to keep busy and not have too much time to think about things. It was over lunch that Liam asked, “ yesterday, I said one of the things I was feeling was angry. But who am I supposed to be angry with? I can't really blame the doctors because they were only doing their job. They didn't know mum would react so badly to the treatment.”

I had to think for awhile before I could answer the question and even then I didn't really answer it. “ I was angry with the people who did all those really horrible things to me. They were the ones who killed my mum and dad,” I said. “ I was also angry with the idiot of a headmaster we had at school at the time. He was the one who called my parents, so he was as much to blame as the other people involved. If he had just let the police handle it, like they said they would, my parents would still be alive.”

We just sat and finished eating lunch and then got changed to go to the funeral home. We left the house and got into the Rolls Royce. Did I mention that dad had bought one? He had sold his business and made a huge profit in doing so. Another reason for buying the car was a little gift to himself for steering the band to success. We knew we were the ones who had really created the success. After all, we wrote the songs, we spent the long hours in the studio recording and re- recording until it sounded just how we wanted it to. Having said that, we had to let dad have his little bit of pleasure form the whole thing. It was just after one thirty when we left for the funeral home. When we got there, dad turned to Liam and asked, “ are you sure you want to do this?”

Liam sat and thought for a moment before saying, “ I need to. The last few days have been like a dream and I need to do this to make it real.”

We had arrived a little early and had to wait in the waiting room for around ten minutes. It was probably the longest ten minutes of my life. While we were waiting, John arrived and sat and talked to Liam. John was the closest that Liam had ever had to a father. Finally, one of the funeral directors came to get Liam. He looked nervous. Liam took a hold of my hand and asked, “ would you come with me?”

I followed the funeral director and Liam. I was nervous. Anne looked so peaceful, just lying there. They had put a wig on her and used some make up to make her look just like she had before she got sick and started losing her hair due to the chemo therapy. In a way, it looked as if she was just sleeping. We made our way to the coffin and just stood there for a while, lost in our own thoughts.

Liam finally started to speak in a soft and quiet voice, “ I'm gonna miss you mum. I know that you aren't suffering any more and I'm greatful for that. I just wish you had listened to me and stopped smoking but I suppose it's too late for that now. Bye mum and as I already said, I'm really gonna miss you.” We stood in silence for about five minutes before making our way back to the waiting room.

Mum, dad and John then went in to pat their respects to Anne.

After a few minutes, I said to Liam, “ Are you Ok?”

“ I suppose so,” Liam replied. “ The last couple of days have been like a really strange dream but now I've seen my mum for the last time, it's suddenly become real.”

After that we sat in silence until it was time to go home. Mum and dad invited John for dinner, an invitation which he gladly accepted.

Saturday was the day when things finally started to get back to normal. Whatever normal is. Steve and Chris had showed up early. In fact, by the time Gary, Liam and I got down for breakfast our fellow band members were already sat at the kitchen table. Mum had made pancakes with bacon and maple syrup for breakfast. Liam thought it sounded like a disgusting combination, until he tried it and discovered that it was actually very tasty. After breakfast, we went to the studio. ( the one in the attic ) and worked on some songs for the morning. I'm not sure what time it was but Callum and Aaron turned up at some point. They even grabbed a microphone and sang with us for a while. They were both really good. I even said, “ you know, you two are really great singers, maybe you should record a demo of some of our songs and see what happens. After all, we write far more songs than we can possibly record ourselves.”

After I had said that, Gary just said, “ guys, don't listen to him.”

We were all in fits of laughter after that. After lunch, we were so wrapped up in whatever it was we were doing that we hadn't noticed Callum and Aaron disappear. They hadn't actually disappeared but I was the first to see them. They were lying in a sixty- nine position, with their jeans and underwear round their ankles and really looked like they were having fun sucking each others dicks. I couldn't resist it but I stopped playing and was soon followed by the rest of the guys.

It was Steve who said, “ how come we stopped?”

“ How do you expect me to concentrate on playing with that show going on in the corner?” I asked.

When they suddenly realised that they had been seen, Aaron asked, “ did we do something wrong Jason?”

“ Well, not exactly. I know you two love each other but you need to be careful about were you do that,” I said.

“ Erm...... sorry Jason. I just think we just wanted to show how much we love each other,” Aaron said.

“ You must know what it's like being a horny teenager?” Asked Callum.

“ Yes, I do but the only thing I do with Gary in front of other people is kiss him,” I said. “ And even then I'm really careful about where I do it.”

We finally had a really good laugh about the whole situation before Liam said, “ If you two want to show how much you love each other, you can use my room.”

“ Thanks Liam,” both Callum and Aaron said in unison.

As they were leaving the studio, Liam called after them, “ just don't leave any cum stains on the sheets. Nick and I will be using the bed later and not just to sleep in.”

I couldn't help notice the huge grin spread across Nicks face.

Everyone stayed for dinner and we were joined by Jamie and Greg. Mum had made some chicken and red wine casserole thing with mashed potatoes and green beans. It was very tasty and quickly devoured by eight hungry teens. After dinner, Jamie and Greg went into town for another night out around the gay village. Callum and Aaron had to go home, I think that Callum was spending the night at Aarons house. As for the rest of us, we just spent the night playing video games and watching various mind numbing crap on the TV. It was fun all the same.

Sunday morning was none existent, as it was around noon before any of us surfaced. I think that Liam and I both felt a little worn out from the events of the week. Anyway, once we had all showered and dressed, Gary cooked a huge breakfast for the four of us. I think Jamie and Greg had spent the night at Gregs house, as there was no sign of them. Mum and dad had left a note saying that they were meeting friends for lunch and that we had to behave ourselves and make sure we didn't blow the house up and stuff like that. As if we would anyway.

In the afternoon we had visits from Simon and Kyle as well as Carl and Sean. I had been right about them on new years eve. They had been kissing each other purely because they didn't have anyone else to kiss. However, during the next week, they spent a lot of time together and realised that they had really deep feelings for each other and had become boyfriends. Chris and Steve never said much on the subject but I think they sometimes felt a little awkward during lunch, being the only straight guys surrounded by all these teen gay couples.

Late Sunday afternoon, Liam, Gary and I went to my grandparents for dinner. There was nothing better than one of grandmas roast dinners and on this occasion she had cooked a leg of lamb, which was always my favourite. They had invited Nick as well but he had to go home due to some family commitments.

That's the end of chapter 21. I could have carried on but then I would have ended up using all my material for the next chapter. I tried to put a bit more humour in this chapter and I hope it worked.

See you all in chapter 22.

Lol Paul

PS. Happy new year!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!