Truthfully, I don't know how to react. After all, it's not every day that a major bomb shell like this gets dropped on you. Now thinking back, everything was so obvious. I mean now, I always found it kinda weird how he seems to drift off while we are in conversation. Sometimes we would be talking while watching TV and he would just stare at me and when I ask him a question about the topic—he hasn't even heard a single word I said—and he is staring right into my face!

I always found his overprotectiveness to be a little extreme also. Once in the fourth grade John Heel, the class clown, teased me for days after I `mistakenly' walked into the girls bathroom after I accepted a dare. He kept calling me a sissy for days on end until Jesse just got up and punched him square in the face. I mean I got frustrated over the teasing but then again a threat would have worked at best.

He is crying. I must be a worse friend than I thought and now is my chance to make up for it, but how? We are in the heat of the moment. I am fearful that the least bit of disapproval I show could be detrimental to our friendship. What happened to SBFFs? What happened to that supposedly unbreakable bond? Well, the clock is ticking. It has been about 10 seconds since I went into my thoughts. Awkward doesn't even begin to describe this. The clock is ticking—tick tock tick tock. It's time to respond. I can see those eyes once filled with the liveliness of Jesse himself now overwhelmed with fear. Genuine fear.

How could I do this? Never in a million years would Jesse even think of hurting me and here I was, causing so much harm even though I haven't even opened my mouth since he told me that he was in love with me. Is it possible to fix this somehow? Can something as ugly as the wounds in those eyes ever be healed?

What happened to our shield? The promise we made to stick to each other till death. A promise we made to never doubt or abandon our apparently fragile relationship. But then again, I am moving. Our friendship would eventually deteriorate or at least not be as strong as once upon a time. I am now ignoring the issue at hand. Ten seconds turn into twenty and 20 seconds magically evolves into two minutes. Tick tock tick tock, time to react I guess.

I go crazy for emails so let me know what you think. Email at romanokristoffersen@gmail.com. Once again, this story will continue. A man is his word and don't you forget that.

Au revoir...