Date: Fri, 25 Jun 1999 23:18:56 EDT From: VIHoa@aol.com Subject: The Clique Chapter 5 Hi all! Well, here it is, the fifth chapter of the Clique. To get the storyline to be more about "The Clique" and less like Brandon and Phillip, I decided to have a new narrator. I hope you like it. I've been thinking about this for a long time. And this is the resort. For all of you who just wanna get off on this story, no luck. It's more romance. For those of you who want, from what I'm told... "A heart felt romance, with jucy twists and turns" this is it. (What twists and turns? It's only been 4 chapters! Oh well. Gives he something to work towards.) Again, any comments and critisms will be greatly appreciated at vihoa@aol.com PEACE!!! Phil Chapter 5: The Thorned Rose Dear Journal, Finally! Finally!!! I finally get a chance to hang out with Brandon without Phil dangling on his leg! Why is he always with Brandon! I don't get to see the guy all spring break and now when I get the chance to hang out with the most gorgeous guy in the world this new kid has to come and busy up his time! Why does Brandon always have to play the nice guy. Well... maybe because he is the nice guy, the great guy... the greatest guy to ever walk this planet... God I love him!!! Angel Today is the day. Today is the day I tell Brandon how much he means to me! Today is the day I tell him I love him. I finally get him all to myself this afternoon and I'm gonna tell him how much I love him and care for him. It's weird really, I've never felt this way about anybody before, let alone a guy! But this isn't any normal guy! This is Brandon Lauderdale! We've been the best of friends since the thrid grade. And lived down the street from each other longer than that! We've done everything together, little league, pee wee football, boy scouts, everything... and there's nothing we don't know about each other. We've got a good thing. Then last summer, we were hanging out by the lake at my uncle's ranch. There was something about how his face looked in pale moonlight that just drew me in. Somthing about the words comming out of his mouth that made them sound like music to me. I don't know... I just know that that was the night that I fell in love with my best friend. That was the night that I began to see him as more than the guy I hung out with, more than my "partner in crime." That night I saw him as my love interest and my potential boyfriend. I fell, and I fell hard. I began to miss him when ever we were apart. Miss him something awful! Last week was spring break and I went with my family to Cancun, needless to say that I was in pain without B. I don't think the feeling was mutual, when I came back... It seemed as if B. had already made a new friend. Phillip Le. Well, I have to say that this guy was cute! I mean, spikey black hair, gorgeous smile, swimmer's build, tan... tall, dark, and damn handsome! But he was no where near B. Brandon, always friendlier to new students than anyone of the Clique's members could ever be, took Phil under his wing and showed him how to survive here at Westfield. Why get so attached to something you're just gonna forget about during the summer?!?! They seem to be getting way too close. But Phil seems straight to me. Still, I don't like how buddy buddy they've become in such a short period of time. Especially how B. ditched my first attempt to out myself to him by treating Phil to dinner. Oh well, that was yesterday, the past. This is today, and today's the day! All I could think about during six period art was me and Brandon. My B. Alone, away from prying eyes. I could just imagine how our meeting would go... During an intense game of basketball, Brandon takes off his shirt and I follow. Sweat dripping from his forhead. Some drops stream down his cheekbones, hanging desperatly on his chin, while others stream down his neck and coat his heaving, chiseled chest, making them glow in the light of our back poarch. His shorts clinging to his thighs and hips outlining his cock for me. Then after acouple more shirtless hours of shooting hoops, we collapse on the drive way. Sweat still pouring from both our bodies. I can see the drops go between the crevases his six pack makes as they soak into his shorts. We sit there, in the cool evening air... "B.?" I ask. "Yeah?" He smiles, his chest still heaving. "There's something that I've been wanting to tell you for the longest time... but I don't know how you'd react." I said nervously. "Just spit it out Ang, there's never been anything you couldn't tell me. Plus I probably know it already since you are soooo bad at keep things from me." He said with confidence. "Well... B, do you remember that night acouple summers ago when we were hanging out by my uncle's lake?" I was nervous. "Ya gotta be more specific Ang, the Clique goes there every summer, and acouple times in between!" "Well, do you remember last June?" I was only speaking a few words but my mind was processing info at a mile a minute. "Yeah, that was a blast. You and Linda had to leave early cuz y'all got that jobs at Armani Exchange... too bad, we had tons of fun with Sebastian and your uncle and aunt." He said as he wiped some more sweat from his forehead. "Yeah, well... that night at the lake, I found something... Something that I had for along time, but I didn't know how much I loved it until I saw it that night." This was IT!!! "I know, that 'My Buddy' doll, we found in the attic when we were bored after comming in from the lake!" "Well... yeah, but other than that!" Brandon let go a small laugh as he scooted closer to give me his full attention. At this point our legs were touching, I could feel how sticky his skin was. He placed his and on my thigh, gave it alittle rub. "I found something too Ang." Then he kissed me... It was increadible! Our tongues darting into each other's mouths. His hand roaming up under my shorts. He brought his other hand up to my cheek and caressed my face. He then leaned back, breaking our kiss... "I love you Brandon..." I said, half in shock, half in heaven. "I love you too, Angel... Angel....! ANGEL!" "ANGEL!!!!!!!! ANGEL VALMONT!!!!!!!!!!!!" I woke up to see my art teacher staring at me. The other students were also looking at me, laughing and snickering. "Nice to see you awake Mr. Valmont." She said sternly. "Wha? Oh, yeah... art, I'm still in school." "Yeah! Art! Now can you please tell me why you have not cleaned up your area and why your elbow is in the Plaster of Paris?" She said looking down at my elbow. "Oh God!" I lifted my elbow out of the gunk and ran to the sink to clean it off. FUCK!!! I really liked this Gucci shirt too! Oh, well, I'm going shopping this weekend anyways. "You better hurry Angel, the bell's going to ring..." "RRRRRINGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG!!!!" "Now... Clean up this mess, and turn off the lights when you're done k? I got a faculty meeting now." And with that my art teacher left me alone. I cleaned up my area and flew out of the studio, turning off the lights ofcourse. I didn't even run to my locker to drop off the boulder which I call my history book. I ran straight into the parking lot and jumped into my Jag convertable. I cranked up the A/C, fastened my seat belt, poped in my Jordan Knight CD and high tailed it home. As I sped home, the tension was mounting on me. My palms were sweating as I clutched the stearing wheel and mind was racing as fast as my car was 80 mph on a busy road, dangerous I know, but I'm in a hurry and nervous as a groom marrying and ugly bride! I pulled up to my driveway expecting B to be there already, no luck. It couldn't be traffic. I got home pretty quick, maybe he's stuck in the traffic I caused... nah, that little Miata couldn't of held traffic up that long, but that light pole crashing down onto the street after I sent the little Miata flying into it might have... Nah! Brandon takes the backroad home anyways. He'll be here in awhile. I got out of my car and walked down to my mail box to stall time. As I walked I kept my head turn towards Brandon's house, maybe I'll see him come down the street. No luck. I got the mail and went back to my house. As I walked back up the drive way,I started to think about B as I flipped through my mail. "Where was Brandon? Junk. Maybe he's dropping someone off. Junk. Linda and Toni's always hitching rides... Dad's new Playboy... Dominos Medium Pizza only $9.99... Angel Valmont you might have won $1,000,000... What's taking him so long? Choose ATT to save on all your long distance calls... He better not be with Phil... Oh! The new GQ! Hello half naked men in Calvin Klien ads!" You know, just the random thoughts one gets while flipping through the mail. I walked through the back door and placed the mail on the kitchen counter. I decided to call him to see if he's home yet. I dialed the number, no answer. He probably did pick up Toni and Linda. At least he's not giving Phil a lift home. Good thing that boy's got his own car. I hung up the phone and turned on the t.v. "I'll just watch some MTV." Total Request Live was on to take away the thought of Brandon... somewhat. "Alright you crazy kids. That was the number 3 video chosen by you, the viewing public... Ms. Britney Spears with her video "Sometimes." Now if you love Britney and want to see her kick out one of those boy bands, dial 1-800-DIAL-MTV and place your votes. O.K. kids, now, barely holding onto number two by one lousy e-mail request... The Backstreet Boys with their video 'I Want It That Way.'" I've gotta admitt, MTV VJ, Carson Daly is a cutie, too bad he's not built like Brandon or anyone of the Backstreet Boys or *NSYNC... and he's hairy too... eww... Oh well, I've got Brandon. If only he'd come HOME!!!! I got back up to walk to the frig. I opened it up and got myself a can of Ginger Ale. God I loved this stuff! I could live off of it. I turned my attention to the phone and decided to call him. Come on B! Pick up!!! I started to sing to the song comming from the t.v. Now I can see that we're falling apart >From the way that it used to be, yeah no matter the distance I want you to know That deep down inside of me You are my fire The one desire You are, you are, you are, you are Don't wanna hear you say I want it that way... But what if he does want it that way after I tell him I love him. What if he never speaks to me again?!?! I don't know for sure if Brandon's gay. I only know for sure that I am. What if he totally rejects me? What will I do without him in my life? I let a tear drop as I took another sip of my soda. I sat back down at the couch and thought about the negative outcome as the commercials played. He's my best friend. We've know each other since the third grade. If anything he'll understand. I mean, Kim had a crush on him for years and told him about it. Nothing happened, they're still friends. But she wasn't his best friend and she wasn't a he. If he accepts me being gay, then that proves how strong our friendship really was, and if he doesn't... then our friendship never really amounted to anything, over 9 years wasted... I need to take my mind off of this and think positive. Don't dwell on the neg Ang, that'll get you nowhere but back... into the closet. I turned up the volume to the t.v. "Alright, it's time for what all of you've been waiting for. It's time for our number 1 video as requested by all of you. Drum roll please! Our number 1 video today is... *NSYNC with their video 'I Drive Myself Crazy!' Again, if you don't like this video at number one then... shove it! Nah, just call in, e-mail, sky write... 1-800-DIAL-MTV and cast your votes. Who wouldn't want *NSYNC at number 1 anyways? They're such lovely boys!" I was such a fool I couldn't see it Just how good you were to me You confessed your love Undying devotion I confessed my need to be free And now I'm left With all this pain I only have myself to blame I lie awake I drive myself crazy, I drive myself crazy Thinking of you Made a mistake When I let you go baby I drive myself crazy Wanting you the way that I do Well, I'M not gonna let him go so easily. But I am driving myself crazy wondering where in the world he is! He'll be here. I'm gonna go upstairs and change into my b-ball gear. I turned off the t.v. and ran up to my room. I started to rummage through my draws. Ah! There it is. My lucky baby blue North Carolina jersey and pants. Never lost a game to B in these babies! I close the door to my room and started to strip. I stripped down to my boxer-brief, then walked over to my mirror to take a look at myself. This is it! This is what I'm giving to Brandon. A green eyed, 5'10'', blond, 17 year old with a six pack that took 3 hours a day, 6 days a week to get. I hope he accepts it. I took the jersey and threw it on. I must admitt, it does hang nicely on me. And I slipped into my shorts. "BEEP! BEEP!" It's a car! It's BRANDON!!!" I ran downstairs and out the backdoor as fast as I could. Funny, when did Brandon drive a Lexus? He doesn't. The car drove up to the end of the driveway and parked. "Angel dear! Can you help me with the groceries?" My mom called out. "Sure mom!" I proceded to help my mom bring in the groceries. What? Was she cooking for a circus to come and visit? I brought the groceries in and set them on the kitchen counter. I then headed to the phone and called Brandon's house again. No answer. This is getting tiresome. "Hey, mom. When you were comming down the street, did you happen to see Brandon's Benz in his driveway?" "Why yes dear I did. Why do you ask?" "Oh, well, he said he was gonna come over and shoot some hoops with me after school and he hasn't shown up yet." I explained. "Well, maybe he's just really tired. In fact I'm sure of it. He probably just came home exhausted and fell asleep." My mom, always able to lift my spirits. "Yeah, you're probably right mom." I gave her a hug, "Maybe I'll call him later and see if he's up to a game then." I went back outside, this time I took my cell phone with me. I took acouple more shots and practiced my three-point shots for about a half and hour. He's probably up by now. I dialed his house again. Busy?!?!?! Geeze!!! I must've bothered his sleep like no body's business if it was enough for him to take the phone off the hook! He must be exhausted. Hmm... it would be like him to sleep like a lazy ass then do some physical activity. Oh, well, I'll just have to wait until tomorrow to tell him. If I could do it today, then I could definatly do it tomorrow. But I wanted to tell him so bad!!! Maybe I should go over there a tell him.... nah, that would be bad. "Brandon! BRANDON wake up!!! I gotta tell you that I love you and I want to be with you!" SMACK!!! If I learned anything, it's not to mess with Brandon while he's sleeping. He'd smack a priest if the priest woke him up. Just as I began to walk back inside... "BEEP BEEP!!!" I turned around. It was Ty, pulling into his driveway across the street. He jumped out of his Integra and walked over to me. I met him half way. "B's a no show again huh?" He said with a grin. "Yeah, probably passed out. Tired from school and all." "Yeah, I'm about to take a nap myself. Hey Ang, when did B's family by a new BMW?" "New Beemer?" I asked. "Yeah, you know... one of those little roadster's James Bond drove... a Z3! That's it, a Z3, red one." "Did you say a red Z3?" I only know one person with a red Z3. "Yeah, man I love that car. Hey, doesn't Phil drive a red Z3?" A red Z3, Phil's red Z3. My eyes started to tear up infront of Ty without me even knowing it. "Ang, man. Are you alright? You're... you're crying..." I wiped the tears from my eyes, trying not to break down infront of him. "I'm fine... umm... I'm gonna havta talk to ya later, I just remembered something. I let B borrow a jacket of mine and I need it back." I started to back away from Ty. I need to see for myself. "Ummm... o.k. Are you sure you're fine? Positive?" He asked with concern. "Y... yeah I'm sure, listen... later!" I turned my back to him and ran down the street to Brandon's house. "Yeah, bye." I didn't answer. By the time he said that I was already at the end of his driveway. Then I ran. I ran down the street to B's estate. Phillip was there? Why was he there? What are they doing? How could Brandon forget about me? He promised. He promised he'd come over. Has Phil suddenly become more important than his best friend? Could they be... I don't even want to think of it. What's going on here? Why does he want to spend so much time with this guy? They've only known each other for 2 days! How could you do this to me Brandon!!! All these thoughts started to fill my head as I ran up to his gates. I punched in the security code and steped in. I walked down the driveway, and sure enough, parked in front, next to B's Benz was Phil's red Z3. I walked up to the front door and pressed the door bell. No answer... I pressed it again... and again... and again... no answer. I began to break down all over again. WHAT WERE THEY DOING!!!! But then I came to a logical conclusion. Phil's probably over there to do some homework, or B's just tutoring him or something. My mind's just filled with jealous thought cuz maybe Brandon wants to get his work done before he comes over. I mean, he's always been the smart one. The one that always completes his work. That's it. And they're probably in the back, that's why they wouldn't be able to hear me. I'd be hard to hear me if they're not in the house. I took a short time to laugh at myself. How silly of me to think otherwise. Phil's straight, he's gotta be. I saw how he and Linda look at each other. And Linda couldn't stop talking about what a great guy he was at work last night. She went on and on about how good he smelled, and how he dresses... I've gotta admitt, the boy is pretty fine. And B... well, I'm hoping B's at the least bi, or bi-curious. He he he he... It'll work out. The only thing I'm focused on is finding those two book worms. I walked around the house, to the back. I looked onto the poarch, empty. Maybe they're by the pool. I walked down to the pool, no one. Maybe in the pool house, nope. The gardens? The guest house? The prominade? The green house? No, no, no, no, NO!!! Where were they?!?!?!? Could they still be in the house? If they are then why didn't one of them answer the door, or the telephone? I started to walk over to the back of the house. I looked into the living room window... empty. The library window, no one. The foyer window, still empty. Maybe he's getting something to eat, of couse I know he'll just spit it all out again in shock when I tell him what I'm gonna tell him. Alright, this is the hour, the minute, moment in time that I tell Brandon how much I love him. I looked into the kitchen win... d... oh MY GOD!!! No! NO!! This can't be happening!!! Why is this happening to me?!?!? There they were, Phillip and Brandon, Brandon and Phillip. On the kitchen floor! Making love!!! Tears flooded my eyes like a reflex. It clouded my visions so much I lost balance and fell to my knees, they were to weak to support me anyways. I couldn't believe this! Why today!!! Why was this happening... right before... right before I was going to tell B, that I... I love him. I love him... those words suddenly lost all meaning. I could feel a sharp pain attack my heart. Tears streamed down my face and neck, soaking the collar of my shirt. I wanted to slam my fist on the window, break it down, and stop them from hurting me any further. I wanted to fling myself into the pool and end my pain in a watery grave. I... I... I just needed to get out of there. I tried my best to stand up, but only to come back down. My body wasn't up to it. It hurt, it hurts so much! I tried again, stumbleing as I made my way around the house. Once I got going I ran down the driveway and back home, tears still flowing out of my eyes. I just had to get out of there. Well, there it is. My first story told by another member of the Clique. I hope you like it. Expect to hear from other members as time goes on. I love to hear from y'all. Send all comments/critisims to vihoa@aol.com