Date: Sun, 13 May 2001 13:42:03 -0400 From: Justin Subject: Through My Eyes, Chapter I know. I know. It's been a super long time and I promised it wouldn't take that long. The truth is, I misplaced the disk with the story on it, but here it is. I'm going to go ahead and just post all the chapters at once, so all of you impatient people (jk) will be happy. Thanks for reading and writing to me! Hope you enjoy!! Through My Eyes Chapter 13 The afternoon that I spent at Cody's house is all a haze and at times, I'd wondered if it was a dream and if I'd wake up in my bed at any time. Suffice to say, I was extremely happy knowing that it was, in fact, very real. Cody convinced me to call my parents, concerned that they might be worried about me and he was right. My mom answered the phone in hysterics and started crying when she heard my voice answer her. I told her I was alright and where I was and she demanded that I come home immediately. She would deal with me later. I sighed and hung up the phone, looking at Cody sadly. I didn't want to go. He half-smiled, understanding that I had to leave. I looked over to Jon who shrugged and put his hand on my shoulder comfortingly. He'd shown up earlier that day and I met him officially. He was a good guy. Cody told me he knew about him being gay and supported him completely. Finally, I stood up. "I gotta get going before they send the police to escort me home." I tried to muster up a laugh, but my dread won out and I sighed. Cody stood and pulled me into a warm hug. I wrapped my arms around his neck and laid my head down on his shoulder. I closed my eyes and once again breathed in his scent, trying to burn it into my memory. I felt myself on the verge of crying once more, so I pulled away and headed towards the door. Cody followed close behind me, clutching my hand. I could tell this pained him as much as it did me. I didn't look at him. I knew if I did, that would be all she wrote and I'd turn into a blubbering mess. I thanked Jon for helping me out the night before and he told me.."Don't be a stranger." "Wait," Cody said before disappearing upstairs. He returned a few minutes later with a jacket in his hands. "What took you so long?" "Here, it's chilly out and yours is still wet." He handed me the jacket and I put it on. It smelled like him. I smiled and opened the door, my head down. I hesitated, biting my lower lip. I turned and threw my arms around Cody once more, holding him tightly. "I'm always here, Jack. Always yours." He whispered into my ear. A tear slid down my cheek and I pulled away, looking into his eyes. "I love you," I stated silently. He smiled and wiped the tear from my face. With that, I turned and headed to my car, not looking back. I got in and started it up, heading down the street to what I used to call home. Funny, home had a new meaning just then. In my mind, home is what I had just left behind. I parked in my driveway about an hour later and got out of my car slowly. I had driven like a robot all the way, only coming here because I knew I had to. I slowly ascended the front steps and was about the open the front door when it swung open. My mom stood there with eyes full of all different emotions. Relief, anger, desperation, ANGER. Her eyes stung me like a thousand needles. I smiled as she pulled me into a tight hug, nearly choking me. "I'm ok, Mom." I whispered as she began sobbing. She pulled away and glared at me. "Don't you ever pull a stunt like that again, you hear me?!" She shrieked, her words thick, but shaky. She pulled me into another hug before we went inside. She led me into the kitchen where my father sat at the table, drumming his fingers on the surface of it. When we walked into the room, he looked up and jumped to his feet. "Jack! What the hell were you thinking?" His voice quaked with desperation, just as my mother's had. I took a deep breath. "I'm ok, Dad." I assured him, looking at my mom as well. My Dad nodded and pulled me into a hug. "I'm sorry. I'm really sorry." I pleaded. When I pulled away from my Dad's hold, my mom took me by the shoulders and stared me straight in the eye, knowing I couldn't lie to her that way. "What were you doing in Charlotte?" "I went to see a friend," I said softly, pulling Cody's jacket tighter around me. "A friend? I've never heard of a friend that lives in Charlotte!" she threw her hands up in disbelief and then looked at me once again, as if realizing something. "You haven't talked to me in so long, Jack. Why should I know anything about you or your life?" "Mom.." "No. I don't know you anymore." She flew out of the room, her robe flowing after her as if in some kind of dream. I looked up at my Dad and he looked away. He, too, walked out of the room, unable to think of anything to say to me. I stood there, a knot of guilt forming in the pit of my stomach. I didn' t realize. I sighed. "Guess they're out of good ones." Came a voice. I turned and saw James, standing in the doorway to the living room. "Scuse me?" I whispered coldly. I didn't want to deal with him. Not now, not ever. He approached me slowly, a sly grin on his face. "Their last son, their last chance at having a good son.. gone. It's a pity, really." He came close and whispered in my ear. "You should be ashamed of yourself." I closed my eyes, feeling my blood boil inside me and my face getting hot. I tensed up and clenched my fist hard, trying to control myself. When I opened my eyes, he had gone. I breathed out, feeling myself cooling down a bit. I walked slowly up to my room and closed the door behind me, leaning back against it. I was in my bubble now. I walked over to the balcony doors and pressed my forehead against the cool glass. I peered out over the shimmering water as the moon reflected off of it. I opened the door and stepped out into the cool night air. A slight breeze greeted me and I crossed my arms over my chest. I leaned against the railing, staring out over the moonlit horizon. I breathed in the smell of the sea air and closed my eyes for a brief second, letting the air and the night surround me. And then, as I walked back inside and laid in my bed, sleep surrounded me. "Where the hell were you?" My trance-like state was interrupted as Jessy rushed up to me. I suddenly snapped back to reality, my classmates surrounding me, running off to their classes. "Your parents called my house looking for you sounding frantic. I was worried sick!" She continued, pushing me for some kind of answer. I didn't know what to say. I couldn't even come up with a good lie. "I went upstate." I answered simply and vaguely. The space between her eyebrows scrunched up as it used to when she wasn't clear about something. "I don't wanna talk about it." "Oh no you don't. What's upstate?" She pressed on. I stayed silent as we entered our class together. She sighed. "Ok, ok, but you know I'm gonna get it out of you sooner or later." She looked at me funny. "Where'd you get the jacket?" With that, she took her seat. I smiled to myself and sat down as well, pulling the jacket tighter around me. Later that day, Jessy convinced me to take a walk with her in the park downtown, on the battery. I told her I better not because my parents hadn't even spoken to me since I'd gotten home, but she called them for me and they gave in. She always seemed to be able to persuade my parents to do anything. We walked through the park, side by side. We didn't say much besides small-talk. It felt good. I loved how she could just be with me, quiet, comfortable. She was a good friend. Eventually, though, her curiosity got the better of her. "So, Jack, what's upstate?" I rolled my eyes and looked out over the water at the Cooper River Bridge. "Come on, I'm dying here!" She hugged my arm jokingly and pretended to beg. I shook my head, smiling. I saw a cart on the side of the street selling slushies and headed in that direction. "I'm gonna get a slushie, you want one?" She shook her head. I stepped up to the stand and asked for blueberry, my favorite, paid for it and was getting a straw when Jessy said something that nearly made me drop my cup. "You miss him, don't you?" My head jerked towards her. She held up a folded piece of paper in her hands, a small smile on her face. I approached her and took the paper from her, unfolding it. It was a note, from Cody. I looked up at her. "You mean, you haven't seen this yet?" She asked in surprise. I looked back down at the note and began to read. Dear JC, You're about to leave and I feel my heart breaking. You showing up here surprised me like you wouldn't believe. You scared the hell out of me! Jack, you wouldn't believe how good it felt to hear you say what you said to me. I couldn't believe it. I knew when we met that there was something there and I was so scared before that I would lose you after I told you about me. I prayed to God every night to make you see and he answered my prayer because you came to me. I Love you, Jack and I'll always be here. Always yours. Cody I looked up at Jessy, a tear making it's way down my cheek. "Why didn't you tell me, Jack?" she asked softly. I shook my head, shrugging. "I didn't think you'd understand. I didn't think anyone would." Jessy smiled at me brightly and pulled me into a hug. "Thank you, Jess." I said into her ear. She pulled away and simply smiled at me, nodding. With that, we continued walking through the park. I arrived back home later that evening. The sun was beginning to set and the sky was a bright orange-red color. Jessy pulled up and waited for me to get out. My parents had taken my car away for a month. A light punishment, I thought. I said goodbye and thanked Jessy once more. She nodded and squeezed my hand reassuringly. I got out of the car and shut the door, waving to her as she drove off. I walked up the steps and went inside. I started to go up to my room when I heard my mom call my name from the living room. "Jack, could you come in here for a second." I hesitated, but headed into the living room. I nearly dropped dead when I saw Cody and Jon sitting on my couch. I saw him and my heart jumped. Immediately, I tried to hide my excitement. I looked at my mom. "So this is the young man you went to see in Charlotte." My mom spoke up. I nodded, glancing at Cody. He gave me a half-smile in greeting. My heart jumped again. I looked back at my mom. "They've asked if I'd let them take you to get something to eat." She said finally. I looked at her, waiting to see if she intended to let me go or not. Finally, she seemed to relent. "I suppose it's alright." She finally said. I felt a wave of relief wash over me. Cody and Jon stood up. "Thank you Mrs. Cole. I'm really sorry about everything." Cody apologized sincerely. "That's alright. No one put a gun to his head." She said, shooting me a glare. I avoided her look and headed towards the door, ready to get out of there. They followed me out and the second we were outside and the door was closed, I threw my arms around Cody. He nearly fell backwards and laughed as he tried to gain his balance. "Whoa there, Jayce." He chuckled. I pulled away and smiled into his eyes. I followed them to Jon's car, slipping my hand into Cody's as we walked. He squeezed it gently and our fingers interlocked. I smiled contently as we climbed into Jon's truck. He started it up and we headed off. I laid my head on Cody's shoulder and breathed in his scent. He smelled so good. I smiled once again and closed my eyes. He kissed the top of my head and put his arm around my shoulders. I cuddled up to him and wrapped my arms around his waist, resting my head on his chest. He ran his fingers through my hair soothingly and took my hand in his. I didn't want to let go of him. It was strange how I felt almost magnetic towards him. It had always been there, but now the currents were so strong it was impossible for me to be more than a few inches away from him. He pulled me closer into him, placing another kiss on my head, resting his chin there. Jon glanced over at us and smiled, shaking his head. "So where's a good place to eat around here?" He broke the silence. I looked up and thought for a second. I directed him to a seafood restaurant that my parents would always take me and my brothers to when we were kids. After they all moved out, mom didn't want to ever go back unless we had the whole family together. It had always been my favorite place to eat. We got out of the truck and started towards the door, but Cody stopped. He released my hand and I stared at him for a moment, hurt. Then I realized where we were and nodded, smiling at how easily I'd been able to forget. He smiled and nudged me. "So were your folks really pissed?" he had finally spoken. His voice alone made my heart nearly jump out of my chest. I smiled and rolled my eyes. "Yea, but it was my own fault. I knew the consequences when I decided to leave." He nodded in agreement and then I added. "But it was completely worth it." He blushed slightly, I think that was the first time I'd ever seen him remotely shy. While we ate, we talked about pointless stuff, but it was nice. I found myself nearly unable to take my eyes away from Cody for very long and he would always look at me and smile that amazing smile of his. Jon told me all about when he and Cody were growing up and I told them both about me, my family, and bits and pieces of my childhood. When we arrived back at my house, I sighed. I clung to Cody, not wanting to get out of the truck. "How long are you staying?" I asked softly, looking at Cody, dazed. "Actually, we have to head back tonight." He stated regretfully. I sat straight up. "What? Tonight? But.." I stared at him, unable to conceal my disappointment. He noticed anyway (who wouldn't) and it seemed to crush him. "I know it, Jayce, but I have to go to school in the morning and Jon needs to work. I would stay if I could, you know that." He explained, bringing his hand to my cheek and holding it there, caressing it with his thumb. I sighed in resignation and nodded. "Call me, ok? Anytime you want." He said, looking into my eyes. I nodded and looked down. He pressed his forehead against mine. "Hey. Cheer up, k?" He said softly. "Easier said than done." I replied sullenly. "The world deserves to see you smile. Don't ever hide it." I looked into his eyes and smiled. He pulled me into a kiss, soft and gentle, but brief. When he pulled away, he smiled once again, mouthing the words, I love you. "I love you too," I replied silently before getting out of the truck. I never took my eyes off of Cody's until they backed out of the driveway. I watched as the truck disappeared around the corner before turning to go inside. I went up to my room without stopping to see if my parents were still up. When I reached my room and closed my door, I jumped when I saw my mom sitting on my bed. "I know, Jack."