Date: Sun, 7 Sep 2003 08:53:12 -0700 (PDT) From: Matt Parker Subject: Two Jocks and the runt chapter 4 Okay guys, you know the drill, don't read this if you're under 18 or 21 depedning on where you life. And don't read it if you're offended by homosexuality. Thanks to everyone who wrote to me. And if you couldn't get through, it's cause I was unable to get on the internet for the past few days to delete older mail that has piled up. But it should be working now. Thank all of you for writing, and for reading my story. And remember, HIV is a real problem for gay guys. Wrap it up everytime boys. And now: Two Jocks and the Runt Chapter 4 Everything in the open Mike and Scott sat together this time. Nathan sat in the seat next to them. All three boys were silent as the bus cruised along, until Mike poked Scott in the shoulder. Scott poked back and soon they were back to the normal horsing around they always did, the tension from before melting away. Nathan sat back watching them. Things seemed normal between them. You'd never guess just a few minutes ago Scott had admitted he was attracted to guys instead of girls. Scott was so different than what Nathan thought gay guys were. They were supposed to be these old sex crazed men. They were supposed to be perverted and gross, and nasty. But Scott was young, cute, and a popular kid in his school. He wasn't some horrible person that lurked in the shadow's peeking at normal guys. He WAS the normal guy! The image of the perverted, nasty, disgusting, gay man didn't fit with the kind of person Scott was. Nathan began to wonder if maybe he didn't know anything about what a homosexual really was. "Jerk off." Scott said grabbing Scott. "Dick wad." Mike shot back, jabbing Scott in the ribs. The boys continued wrestling around and trading insults, until Mike blurted out "Queer." without thinking about it. The two boys often called each other "queer" or "fag". They must have used these words hundreds of times on each other, it was just a normal way of insulting each other. Mike's eyes grew wide as he realized what he'd said, and Scott looked as if he'd just been punched hard in the gut. Nathan was quickly brought back from his deep thoughts upon hearing Mike's insult. The mood felt odd, and there was a moment of silence. Mike began to open his mouth to say something, but Scott interrupted. "Yea, cause I had sex with your mom!" He teased, and playfully punched Mike in the ribs. Mike was a little stunned, and them smiled. "Oh, I know you didn't just insult my mom!" Mike yelled, pretending to get mad. "Who said I was insulting her. She was just so good I don't want any other woman!" Scott smiled, and Mike couldn't keep himself from laughing a little. Mike put him arm around Scott's shoulders and they just smiled at each other. Nathan couldn't believe how Scott just shrugged it off and shot back insults as fast as they got shot at him. "Hey man, I didn't mean anything by that. It just slipped out cause we always call each other that." Mike explained, his hand still around Scott's shoulder. Scott just shrugged off the insult, but Mike knew he was just being strong, and that it had gotten to him a little at least. "I know man. Don't sweat it." Scott said. "I don't even think of that word as meaning...you know." Mike tried to explain. "Yeah, I know, I get what you mean. No prob, really." Scott replied. He knew Mike meant nothing bad. It did shock him a little after putting his feeling out in the open, but he was glad Mike was acting the way he always did around him. He never expected his friend to treat him the same way he'd always treated him. He figured he wouldn't want to be around him anymore. Wouldn't want to joke and horse around with him. "I'm just glad you're still willing to pick around at me and stuff. Never thought anyone would if they found out." Nathan knew exactly how he felt. Things were tough enough for Nathan without anyone finding out about the feelings he had. He just knew everyone would beat him up, and torment him for being a pervert, even more so than they already did, if they ever found out. "It's kinda weird, but I'll get used to it." Mike replied. "Besides, I can't say too much since last night I..." Mike couldn't finish what he was saying. His face turned blood red remembering what happened. He'd let Nathan hump him. He lay back on the bed and pulled younger boy on top of him. He'd felt the boy's dick pressed against his. And it felt good! The three boys all blushed and giggled. No one said anything and everyone just stared at the floor or out the window the rest of the way. A few minutes later, the bus pulled up to the hotel and everyone unloaded and went back to their rooms. Again some of the students wanted to go to the pool, and this time one of the other teachers agreed to watch them. Nathan stayed in the room and this time Scott and Mike stayed too. They all sat on the couch watching TV, Nathan sitting in the middle with Scott to his left, and Mike to his right, none of them saying much. Nathan really wanted to talk about all that had taken place today. But he was still very shy around these older guys, or anyone for that matter. He hadn't really said very much and just let the other boys do all the talking. But he wanted so badly for their talks to continue, and his curiosity overcame his shyness. "I thought we were gonna talk more about last night when we got back here. I mean...uh....if you guys wanted to." Nathan said. Mike and Scott looked at Nathan and then at each other and smiled. Clearly the subject was still an awkward one, even with all that had already been said, it'd had barely scratched the surface of everything that was going through the minds of these three boys. "Yeah, I do wanna talk about it." Mike said. "It's just kinda weird talking about all this." "Yeah, it's weird for me too." Scott said. "I can't believe I actually said all that stuff today." "It was weird hearing you talk like that." Mike said, and gave Scott a reassuring smile. Scott smiled back, feeling a little uncomfortable. Then Scott looked down at Nathan sitting quietly to himself. He was so quiet, sometimes it seemed like he wasn't even there. "What about you runt? You haven't said much. What are you thinking about all this?" Scott asked. Nathan looked back and forth at the two boys. He didn't know what to say. He hadn't been participating in the talks very much. He just sat back and let them do the talking most of the time, even though there was so much he wanted to know. So much he wanted to ask and say, but after years of people putting him down, telling him to shut up and that his opinion didn't matter, it was hard for him to find his voice. "Uh...I don't know." Nathan said. "Oh come on Nate, you can talk to us. We're not gonna bit your head off." Mike said. Nathan looked at him and gave him a half smile. Nathan began to work up some courage. "I just...I don't understand..." Nathan tried to put into words what he was thinking. "You don't understand what?" Mike asked, putting his hand on Nathan's knee. "I...I don't know. I just don't get it." Nathan said. "People are supposed to hate guys that are...like that. Everyone hates people like that. Everyone's always talking about beating up those kind of people. If anyone finds out someone is like that, they hate them. Why are you being so nice?" Mike and Scott looked surprised and off-put by the question. There was a long silence. Scott felt a little scared by this question. What Nathan had just said, was a question that had been in the back of his own mind. He wondered if maybe later on Mike would just get mad and beat him up, and turn his back him. "I'm not like that." Mike whispered. "I know I say queer and fag, and stuff like that to insult people, but I never really meant it like that. I know what people say about gay people, and I know a lot of people think they're perverts and crap like that, but I would never be mean to someone just cause they're gay." Scott just stared at the TV not saying anything. He was unnerved by this conversation, but he wanted to hear it. His heart pounded in his chest, he felt reassured by Mike's answer, but the subject sill made him feel as if he were about to throw up. "I grew up hearing about perverted guys who liked being with other guys, but I always wondered in the back of my mind what was so wrong with it. And then I saw so many things on MTV and other stuff that had gay guys on it, and they were just normal guys that were gay. They weren't perverts, or gross, or anything like that. I think people who hate gay people just don't know anything about them." Mike explained. "You...ya really think it's okay?" Nathan asked, looking down at the floor and almost whispering. "Well yeah, I mean I've never really thought about it a whole lot, but I always said in the back of my mind that if I knew a guy that was gay, it wouldn't matter." Mike replied. "I always figured EVERYONE hated gay people." Nathan said. "I figured everyone thought they were perverts. It's not supposed to be okay or normal." "Well, from what I've heard, you can't help it if you're gay. You just are even if you try not to like guys. I don't think gay people are perverted, I just think they're turned on by guys, so what's the big deal?" Mike said. "Yeah, I....I tried for a long time to try and force myself to like girls, but it just never felt the same way." Scott said, his voice shaking as he finally broke his silence. "Even when I was a little boy when I'd see a nice looking guy without a shirt on, it did something to me, and I knew it wasn't supposed to even back then, but I couldn't help it." Scott couldn't face the other two boys. He was nervous about talking about all this. He and Mike were very good friends, but they hardly ever talked about anything deeper that sports, movies, and video games. "Yeah, and my bud's not a pervert." Mike said. "So, if someone like him or ya..." Mike paused for a moment. "If someone like him is gay, than I know gay doesn't make you a perverted, or gross, or bad person." Nathan thought to himself for a few moments. All kinds of thoughts racing through his mind. He looked over at Scott. Mike was right, Scott wasn't a bad guy. He was gay, but he wasn't a pervert. The concept didn't seem to fit together. Gay seemed to just be another word for pervert. But Scott was gay, yet not a pervert. So maybe being gay, isn't the same thing as being a pervert. Scott was a nice normal jock, and he was gay. So was it okay to be gay? "I...um....I uh...think I am." Nathan stuttered out. Tears began to well up in Nathan's eyes as emotion took hold of him. Mike put his arm around him and drew him close to him. Nathan collapsed into Mike's grasp and the tears flowed freely from his eyes down his checks. "It's okay little guy." Mike assured him. "I..hu huh..I...tried so hard not to be." Nathan sobbed. Mike eye's also began to get misty. He felt bad for Nathan. He pulled him closer to him. Nathan sobbed into Mike's shirt. "It's okay...mm" Mike assured him, holding back his own tears. "It's like I said... it's nothing bad, just think about Scott...he's not bad and neither are you." Scott tuned and faced him. Tears were rolling down Scott's face. Hearing everything Nathan said stirred up his own emotions. Scott put his hand on Nathan's back. "It'll...it'll be okay runt." He said, and began to hug him. Mike put his arms around both Scott and Nathan. And the three boys just sat there holding each other as a thousand and one emotions came pouring out. To be continued... So, what do you think? E-mail me with your comments good or bad. I love hearing from the readers. And if you've tried to e-mail me before and couldn't get through, it's cause my inbox is filled up and I haven't been able get on the internet much the past few days to check, if this story is up, it means my e-mail is working again, so feel free to e-mail me. shyguy_bj@yahoo.com Thanks for reading!