Date: Thu, 30 Aug 2007 20:07:33 -0700 (PDT) From: Lusty Subject: Uncovered "Get out of the way faggot!" A push sends me crashing in to the lockers. I don't have to turn around to see who it is because I know that voice and I know that touch. I know its Jason. He walks by me and I get a good look at his backside. He's wearing the khaki shorts I bought him and a white wife-beater. I hate him for being so damn sexy that I willingly degrade myself just to be with him. But he does look good in those shorts. He knows I'm watching him. I can't help it. He looks over his right shoulder and smiles at me then he continues walking down the hallway. I love him. I stop at my locker and grab my notebook then I go to class. Jason is sitting in the back with the rest of the wrestlers. He flashes me a quick glance and I bite my lip to keep from smiling at him as I walk towards my seat on the front row. I sit down and something hits the back of my head. I ignore it. About a second later, something else hits the back of my head. I turn and look at the two spitballs on the floor behind me. During the day these spitballs are Jason's love taps. I look at him and he hits me in the face with one. A few kids snicker. One of the wrestlers gives him a high five. I wait until our eyes meet before I turn to face the board. We have two classes together and the same lunch period, but we do not speak during lunch unless I accidentally cross his path and then it is our eyes that exchange words. I am the keeper of his secret. I have been since we were thirteen and our experimentation began. We were best friends from fourth grade to seventh grade. He lived down the street from me and I thought he was the coolest thing next to the slinky. I followed him around like I was attached to him at the hip and it's been that way ever since; I follow, he leads, regardless of the situation. By twelve, I knew I was attracted to him and I knew what that meant. I turned to the internet for support and discovered pictures of naked men and then pictures of naked men doing things to each other. At thirteen, Jason caught me staring at him while he undressed. "Like what you see?" he asked. I wanted to lie, but I didn't, "Yes," I confessed. He smiled and finished pulling his underwear down, "Prove it." He grabbed my hand and put it on his chest. That was the moment our relationship changed and I became his private sex toy. I did whatever he asked me to do and I let him do whatever he wanted to do to me. I even let him have sex with me before I was ready but I was okay with it because he was happy. We were happy and closer than ever for a year and then, in the middle of eighth grade, Bobby Velero called us gay and Jason flipped out. Jason started pulling away from me at school. He started hanging out with Bobby and soon Bobby and Jason were telling everyone I was gay. I guess I could have told everyone about Jason, but I loved him too much to expose his secret. Here I am, four years after we started messing around with each other and three years after he started bullying me and I'm still crazy about him. His body has developed nicely since we were kids, but I don't stick around for his body, I stick around because I can't imagine not being with him. The way he kisses me when we're alone tells me that he loves me too. At the end of each day I work at my father's bookstore for three hours and then I go home to do homework and get online and talk with my friends. My friends are cool with me being gay but none of them know about me and Jason. As a result, my friends have attempted to set me up with every gay guy they meet. You would think they would get the picture and leave it alone but no, I go to a party with them and they find a gay guy and bring him over for me to meet him as if I'm going to fall all over him. They don't want me to be alone and I can't tell them that I'm not so I make myself seem like some pathetic loser who doesn't know how to talk to potential dates. Speaking of which, Lori, my best friend at school, is trying to harass me in to going on a date with her cousin, Carey, who just moved in with her brother. He lives about thirty minutes away from us and according to her he is the cutest thing in the world. I will admit his myspace picture is pretty nice but nobody compares to Jason. I stare at Carey's picture and pick apart his features. His eyes aren't as nice Jason's. His nose is bigger than Jason's. His hair is longer than Jason's. His smile is not as bright as Jason's. I hear my door open and I turn and smile at Jason as he walks in the room. He closes the door and looks at the screen. "Do I have competition now?" he asks. "No, Lori wants me to go on a date with her cousin. You know she's always trying to set me up with someone." "He's cute. Maybe you should go out with him." "Huh?" "I said" "I heard what you said, but are you serious? You want me to go on a date with another guy?" "Why not?" "You threaten to beat up every guy you see me talking to and now you want me to go on a date?" "I just think you should start meeting guys." "Why would I want to meet guys when I have you?" "You don't have me." "Right. I forgot. We're just friends." Jason walks over to me and kisses me, shoving his tongue down my throat. He pulls back, "We're not friends." We laugh at our inside joke and then he kisses me again and I try to stand but he pushes me down. "Not today, Tiger." Jason turning down sex is a sure sign that the world is coming to an end. "What's wrong?" "Nothing's wrong." He looks at the screen. "What's his name?" "I can't believe you're jealous of a picture." "I'm not jealous." "Yes you are." "No, I'm not." He begins backing away from me. "You deserve to have a real boyfriend because I'm never going to be that for you." We have had this talk so many times that I can quote my lines verbatim without paying attention. "We've been over this, I don't care. I'm fine with the way things are between us." "You're fine with me bullying you at school?" "We both know why you do it. I've accepted it and so should you." He sits on my bed. "I should accept treating my best friend like shit just so I can fit in with a bunch of guys that I don't really like anyway?" "You don't do it just for them." He avoids making eye contact with me. "Were you really crying in the bathroom during lunch today?" "What?" "Bobby said" "You can stop there. You know how Bobby is." "I know, but it wouldn't be the first time." "How many times do I have to tell you nothing you say or do at school makes me cry anymore because I know you don't mean it." "It doesn't matter whether I mean it or not. I shouldn't do it." Sometimes Jason amazes me with how guilty he feels about the way he treats me. He could stop bullying me tomorrow and no one would question him, but he wants to hang out with Bobby and part of the requirement for him hanging out with Bobby is picking on people like me. Bobby is stupid and mean, but he's popular and his father is the coach of the wrestling team. "Jase I love you. That's all that matters." "But do I make you happy?" "Yes." "Do I make you happy all the time?" "No one is happy all the time." "I wish things were different." Jason half smiles at me. "I wish I was different. You know I hate forcing you to lie about us." "One day things will change." "Things won't change. I'm the problem and I won't change. I can't change. That's why I want you to find someone else." "I don't want someone else. I want you. End of discussion." "No, it's not the end this time. We can't keep having this talk and not doing anything about it. I'm tired of feeling like shit and treating you like shit and being in a relationship that no one knows about. This isn't what I want." "I let you fuck around with girls all the time, what more do you want?" "I want to be with a girl and not wish I was with you." I can tell something has happened. "This isn't just about us, is it?" He licks his lips and says, "I went out with Kelly before I came over here today and," he pauses for a few seconds. I hate drawing things out so I push him, "And?" "And we were making out and I accidentally called her Kevin." I start laughing. "It's not funny Kevin! I've done it before." Hearing that makes me laugh harder. "You've done it before?" "Yes and this time she really freaked out. She thinks I have a thing for you." "You do have a thing for me." "Kev, you're not helping." I keep laughing. "Stop laughing." "Okay, I'll stop, but tell me how did you say it, was it like `oh Kevin' or `uh uh Kevin' and did you draw out my name or did you" I can't finish my question because Jason is standing next to me tickling me. "I'll give you a reason to laugh," he says as he tickles me in to submission. "Uncle." "You have to wait until I tell you to say it." He tickles me some more, "Say Uncle." "Uncle!" "That's better." He leans closer to me and kisses me. His hand slides down my shirt and starts unbuttoning my belt. That's the way things are with us. The slightest touch can turn in to sex but our relationship isn't just about sex, although the sex is great. I guess knowing every crevice of each other's bodies makes it easy to know exactly where to touch and when. We don't make it to a bed but I'm willing to accept the awaiting rug burn because I want to feel him inside me. Jason is sweaty and red by the time we're done and I'm completely satisfied. I kiss him on his cheek, "I missed you." "I know. I've been busy with practice and work and Kelly." He puts his arm around me. "That's why you need to find your own Kelly." "Believe it or not I have things to do, too." "I didn't mean it that way. I was just saying you need someone like Kelly in your life." He stands and starts putting on his clothes. "I have to get home and get cleaned up." "Fine, I'll see you at school tomorrow." I stand and give him a kiss goodbye and then I grab a towel and head to take a shower. Usually we spend more time together and hang out but lately he's been rushing off like he has somewhere to be. After a refreshing shower, I sit at the computer and start talking with Lori. Lori tells me her parents are out of town for the weekend and she's having a small get together at her house tomorrow and I know she's trying to set something up with me and her cousin but I agree to come anyway. The next day, school is more of the same crap. Jason and Bobby pick on me and Jason and I sneak looks at each other. I go to work at my father's bookstore then I go home and shower before I drive to Lori's house for the party. I walk in and the air is ripe with the smell of a setup. The only people at Lori's house are Lori, her boyfriend, Travis, and her cousin, Carey. A few minutes after I sit down, Lori begs Travis to take her to Dairy Queen. I suggest we all go, but Lori insists that Carey and I stay in case someone comes. I tell her I can go to Dairy Queen by myself and get what she wants but she shuts me down and she and Travis all but run out of the house. "I'm sorry about this," Carey says. "Don't be. This has Lori written all over it." "Well it wasn't all her idea." "Oh." "You're uncomfortable?" "No." "Yes you are. You look like you would rather suck on an exhaust pipe than be here." "Sorry." "It's okay. I get it." "It's not you, it's just, that I, um" "You're not interested." He smiles at me and I notice that he is more handsome in person than he is in his picture. He's actually kind of cute, but still not cute enough to compare with Jason. "It's nothing personal. I mean you're cute, I'm just not looking for a boyfriend." "Are you already seeing someone?" "I" "No, don't answer. It's none of my business anyway. Besides the look on your face tells me everything I need to know." "Well what does my face say?" "You're seeing someone but it's a secret so you hesitated because your first instinct was to say yes, but the right answer is no." "Remind me never to play poker with you." He grabs a bag of chips off the table and opens them. "Wow, I wasn't expecting you to admit it." "I didn't admit anything." "Yes you did." I decide to shut up in order to keep from accidentally admitting anything else. Carey tries to start a conversation, "Did Lori tell you about me?" "Yeah, I know you just moved in with her brother." "Did she tell you why?" "No." "Oh, I thought she would have told you about James." I glance at him and I can tell he wants me to ask but I'm not going to do it. After a few minutes of silence, he gives up. "You don't want to date me so I guess I can tell you. James was my boyfriend, well my secret lover slash boyfriend, but in my eyes he was my boyfriend. We were both afraid of being found out and we took extra precautions to seem like we were just friends. It was all good until his older brother caught us. His brother was and still is a homophobic asshole. He told his parents and he told the whole school. I went to school and I put everything on James because I'm a douche bag. I made it seem like he tricked me or something. Looking back I know it was stupid as hell, but I didn't want people to say I was gay. James and I broke up and I was a mess after that. I started drinking heavily and went to rehab and then I got out and discovered James had a boyfriend and James was happy while I was miserable. I hated myself for being dumb enough to let him go and then I just became angry at everyone because I felt like everyone was able to be themselves except me and I wanted what they had. I reached a point where it was either tell the truth or kill myself, so I came clean. I told my parents all about James and they sent me to a therapist to help `straighten' me out. We finally got to the place where I couldn't live with them anymore so they called around to see who would take me off their hands. Lori's brother, Lawrence, took me in a few weeks ago." Carey looks at me and I nod my head like an idiot and say, "Oh." "So Lori didn't tell you any of that?" "No, she just said you were her brother's new roommate." "I guess she wanted to leave it to me to tell you. To be honest, I'm still not completely over James. I think he was the love of my life and he slipped right through my fingers. He was mine. All I had to do was keep him, but I was dumb and selfish and now I'm less dumb and alone." He sighs. "Lori and Lawrence think I need a gay guy to talk to because apparently only a gay guy can understand gay heartache." "They're right. You know us homos need to stick together." He laughs and I laugh with him. "At least you got that it was a joke. The last guy I said that to agreed with me and went on a serious tangent about gay pride and gay rights." "We do need to stick together, but what's the difference between a good gay friend and a good friend? A friend is a friend, gay or straight and any human being who has ever been in love knows how it feels when the love is gone and that's true no matter whether you're the dumper or the dumpee." "Straight people think it's different. I mean yeah we have another set of problems because we're gay but the feelings are the same. Like I love J," I caught myself before I said Jason's name. "I mean I've been in love with a guy before and I dare anyone to tell me the love I felt was different on any level other than physical." "I know a lot of people who would line up to give you a list of reasons why it's different." "So do I, that's why I can't really be with the guy I love." "He's still in the closet?" "Huh? I didn't say that." "If you go back and read between the lines, that's exactly what you said. You can't be with him because of people outside of the two of you, which implies that if other people were okay with it, the two of you would be together." "I think you're reading too much in to what I said." "People only get defensive when the right button has been pushed." He smirks at me. "Thanks again for confirming what I thought." "You can think whatever you want to think." "Why haven't you just told Lori to back off because you're already taken?" I make a face at him. "Oh right, Lori will make you tell her who it is and you don't want to do that." Carey grabs my knee. "Your secret is safe with me." I feel a slight tingle where his hand is resting but then he moves his hand and the sensation is gone. I try to change the subject, "Back to you. You've been through a lot." "Yeah, no shit, but I'm good now. I'm 17 and thanks to what I've been through, I already know who I am and I'm happy for the first time in years and I'm sitting on a sofa with a cute stranger who can't seem to take his eyes off of me." I blush, "Sorry, I'm not staring, I" "It's fine. I don't mind. I'm actually kind of turned on by it." I feel uneasy then he smiles and the tension is gone. "So how long do you think Lori and Travis are going to leave us here?" "They'll be gone at least an hour, maybe more." "So who is your mystery lover?" My face freezes. He laughs. "I'm kidding. How did you meet Lori?" The conversation with Carey begins to flow effortlessly and hours pass before we realize Lori and Travis should be back and we decide to call them. Lori answers her phone and tells me she and Travis are just walking out of a theater across town and they'll be back in about an hour. I call her a bitch and tell her the setup didn't work then I tell her I love her and Carey and I will play some games or something until she gets home. She suggests we play hide the sausage at which I suggest she and Travis play hide the angry inch and she chides me for talking about her boyfriend then assures me that there's more than an inch. Carey almost falls off the sofa laughing. I hang up with Lori and stare at Carey as he tries to calm down. I look at him and can't help but wonder how he looks without his clothes on, but I quickly chase that thought away with images of Jason's naked body dancing around my head. Jason is the man I want and he is the man I love. I have found guys attractive before but nothing ever happens because I refuse to let things go that far. I am not in the market for a boyfriend, but if I was, I would definitely give Carey a call. Carey is relaxed and funny and honest. He tells me things I would never dare tell a stranger but he says he does it because he feels comfortable with me. The two of us are getting along like old friends when Lori and Travis finally decide to show up. Lori is positively giddy when she returns and I can tell that she and Travis had a good time. I can't resist teasing them. "So Lori, did you scratch that itch we talked about?" "Oh yeah and it feels much better." Carey falls on me laughing and my body goes stiff. There's something about the way his head rests playfully on my shoulder and his arm drapes over my lap; something in the vibrations of his body as he laughs; something that screams don't be alone with him again. I try to laugh but all I manage to do is stare at Lori with my mouth wide open. Carey moves away from me and I take a deep breath before realizing I had forgotten to breathe. "Sorry Lori, Vinny drugged me with laughing gas." "Who's Vinny?" Lori asks. I'm looking at him wondering myself who the hell Vinny is and he turns to me and smiles. It finally clicks that I'm Vinny. "How cute, you already have nicknames for each other." "No we don't. No one calls me Vinny." "That's what makes it special," Carey says. "My name is Kevin, it's dumb to have a shortened version of my name that's just as long as my actual name. I can see Kev or Vin, but Vinny? I can't see it." "Other people call you Kev and Vin don't they?" "Yeah." "I'm your only gay friend, aren't I?" "Well," I try to decide if I should tell him he's not exactly elevated to friend status yet but he interrupts, as usual. "Well I think I deserve special privileges. I'll call you Vinny. Now what do you want to call me?" "You can call me Vinny, but that doesn't mean I'll answer," I try to think of the gayest sounding nickname I can come up with for him, "Care Bear." He smirks, "Okay so you obviously lack originality, but you get extra points for using two words." He disarms me. That's the best way to describe it. He effortlessly puts me completely at ease. I hate the idea of someone calling me Vinny, but I find myself thinking I might actually answer if the someone is Carey. Carey is a cool guy. I see him as someone I could hang out with and do absolutely nothing with and still have a good time, but I don't know him and I don't get attached to people easily so I have to wait and find out more about him. "Would you seriously let me call you that?" I ask. "Yes. My mother called me that all my life." "No wonder you're gay," Travis jokes. We all kind of sort of smile. Travis has always had questionable timing with his gay jokes. Travis looks around, waiting to be rescued. I try to help him out by asking, "What movie did you guys go see?" They say two different movie titles and I smell a big fat dirty rat. "You might want to work on that in case your parents ask you." Lori's cheeks become rosy and I have to embarrass her further. "So what hotel did you guys go to? Do they rent by the hour or every half hour?" "Yeah because we might want to check it out," Carey says. I elbow him. "I don't think we'll be needing that information any time soon." "But we will be needing that information eventually?" Carey questions. "Words, mouth, you, all I'm saying." "Lines, between, get it, all I'm saying," he replies. "Aww, look honey they already have their own language," Lori tells Travis. Carey winks at me and I realize I'm staring again. I stand and say, "I should be going." Carey stands beside me, "Don't let me run you away." "Oh no, it's not you. It's um getting late and" "Well wait a sec." Carey moves and I think he's going to hug me but he walks by me. "I'll be right back." Lori and Travis tease me about having a boyfriend and I tell them it's not like that. Carey comes back with a small piece of paper and hands it to me. "That's my cell and my myspace." I tell myself I should accept the number and throw it out when I leave. I put the paper in my pocket. "Well it was nice meeting you." I extend my hand and he slaps my hand out of the way and hugs me. "It was good talking to you. Maybe we can hang out again some time." "Yeah, sure." I hug Lori and nod to Travis then I leave. The drive home is filled with random thoughts. Jason is like smooth jazz and Carey is like hard rock; you can't really compare the two but something about the underlying rhythms is reminiscent of the other. I picture Jason. He's a decent height, a respectable 5'9, and thick and firm or as I like to tell him, nice and meaty, then I picture Carey, who looked to be about 6 feet tall and was definitely skinny. I prefer the in your face style of Jason to the subtle emo vibe I got from Carey, but I keep reminding myself that there's no comparison. In head to head combat, Jason would steamroll the competition. I walk to my room and close the door then collapse on the bed. Jason growls, "What, no foreplay?" I laugh and get off the bed. "What are you doing here? I thought you had to go out with Kelly and fix things.." "I did, but having sex with her made me want to have sex with you." "Wow, thanks!" "Don't be like that. I meant it in a good way." He reaches for me and pulls me down on top of him. "Where have you been?" "I was at Lori's." "Oh." "I met her cousin." Jason's hand stops rubbing my back. "Oh." "He seems like a nice guy." "Oh." "He's nothing like you though." "Oh." He takes a deep breath. "Wait, does that mean I'm not nice?" "Does what?" "You said he seemed like a nice guy then you said he's nothing like me." I think about the way Carey contorted what I said. "I take it back. He's just like you. The two of you would be perfect for each other." "Why?" "Because then you could drive each other crazy instead of me." "He drives you crazy?" I hear the voice of the insecure Jason I'm used to and I kiss him on the cheek and whisper in his ear, "You drive me crazy." I kiss my way to his lips and soon our clothes are being thrown on the floor. Jason surprises me by spending the night. I wake up in the morning, open my eyes and stare in to his smiling face. "Did you know you're beautiful when you sleep?" he asks. "I've been told that a few times." "No doubt by a handsome man who loves you very much." "No doubt." He kisses me on my forehead and I close my eyes and say a silent prayer that he will stay all day. He stretches and says, "Okay now I'm going to ruin the moment." He pauses. "Are you gonna go on a date with Lori's cousin?" "No." "Why not?" "He's not you." "That's kind of the point." I immediately begin to think the worse. "Why are you trying to push me away?" "I'm not." "Then what's different?" "Haven't you ever wondered what it would be like to be with someone else?" "Sometimes I do, but I don't care enough to find out because I already have the one I want." "You're gonna make me say it, aren't you?" "Say what?" "I think about other guys all the time." He says this and I hear him saying that I am not enough. I wonder what I could have done differently and how I could have pleased him more. I start thinking that I should have gone to the gym and worked out so I could build some muscle. "It's not that what we have isn't enough, it's because what we have is so good. I can't help but wonder how it would feel to be with someone else. Haven't you ever thought about it?" "No." He looks at me in disbelief. "Well maybe once or twice." He asks a lot of questions about Carey and I can tell he's interested in him as a potential candidate but I can't tell if he likes him for me or for him. Thinking about him with Carey forces me to picture Carey in sexual positions. Jason spends most of the day at my house and after we eat lunch he convinces me to call Carey. I have a short conversation with Carey and we make plans to hang out the next weekend. Jason is eager to get the ball rolling but I have a little apprehension about bringing another person in to our already screwed up relationship. Over the next month and a half, talking to Carey and hanging out with him quickly becomes my top priority. He has a natural charm and it doesn't hurt that he's so damn cute. I look at him and I know I'm falling for him because he's beginning to beat Jason when I make comparisons. Some times the way Jason treats me at school makes me feel like I don't mean shit to him. He calls me a fag, or some word that means that, everyday and he and his friends make my life a living hell during the day but I can't stop myself from being there when he needs me. He's different when we're not at school. He's kinder and gentler. He's appreciative of me and my body. He doesn't touch me so he can push me away, he touches me so he can pull me closer and I desperately want to be close to him, but now there's Carey. Carey is always nice to me and he isn't worried about being seen in public with me. Carey accidentally brushes against me and I get excited. Carey is just as kind and just as gentle as Jason and I'm starting to think I'm more attracted to Carey than I am to Jason. I invite Carey to my house for the first time and the plan is for Jason to come over and introduce himself. Carey seems nervous when he walks in my room. He sits down on my bed and I sit down next to him. We make small chat and Carey touches me several times. I know he can't help it and he does it because he's touchy feely and I shouldn't give it a second thought, but I do. When he touches me time seems to stop until the contact is broken. "Are you ever going to kiss me?" he asks. I think I'm daydreaming about him again so I make sure I heard the right thing, "What did you say?" "Are you ever going to kiss me or are we going to continue just being friends?" We sit still for a few seconds and then I move in for the kiss. His lips are smaller than Jason's but his kiss is much sweeter. "I still have a boyfriend," I whisper. "You're here with me." We kiss again and I hear someone clear their throat. "Having fun?" Jason asks as he closes the door. "Jason!" I shriek. I try to move as far away from Carey as I can. Jason stares at my pants and I look down and see I am tenting. I put my hand down to cover the area and then I say, "Jason this is Carey. Carey this is Jason." "You're the boyfriend," Carey tells him. Jason looks at me. "You told him?" "He didn't tell me but you just did." Jason smiles, "Kev was right about you." The two of them make barbs at each other for hours before Jason asks Carey if he would be interested in a threesome. Carey turns him down flat and tells him, "I'm only interested in Vinny." Jason leaves a few minutes later and I send Carey home too because I don't want to spend the night with him. I like him more than I ever thought I would and that scares me. Tension builds in my relationship with Jason and we both know it's because of Carey, but neither of us talks about it. One evening Jason comes over and he finally brings up the topic we don't discuss. "You really like Carey, don't you?" "I'm sorry." "Don't be." He crosses his arms. "So am I officially the other guy now?" "I haven't spoken to Carey in over a week." "Because of us?" "Yeah." "But you want to be with him?" "I don't know." "Yes you do and I think you should be with him. He loves you in a way I never will." "How can you say that?" "I talked to him and I saw it in his eyes. He'll be good to you. I made him promise." Jason gets up and opens my door. He waves to someone. Carey appears in the doorway and walks in. I look at Jason. "So what's this? You're giving me away?" "No, I'm letting you go because I love you that much." "You're letting me go because you love Kelly that much, don't act like you're doing this for me." "I am. You deserve more and if you're not going to get it for yourself than I'm going to make you take it when it's offered." He stands. "Be with Carey, be happy and call me later." Carey takes Jason's place on the bed and we sit for a while as I try to think of what to say. Carey, as usual, is the first to break the silence, "I missed you." Three words and I am his. We go on our first official date that evening and we see Jason and Bobby. Bobby moves to come over and bother us but Jason stops him. I watch as things become heated between them. Jason never stands up to Bobby and even Bobby seems surprised. Jason throws the first blow and their friendship based on lies disappears in front of me. Surprisingly, Jason is more popular at school now that he's no longer friends with Bobby. Jason and I are still not best friends at school because we both agreed that would be suspicious but Jason he's at least nice to me. Now that Jason and I are friends in public, his girlfriend tries to talk to me. Kelly is a sweet girl. She talks about Jason and I talk about Carey. I can tell she loves to hear about Carey. Jason says Kelly is worried that he would leave her for me and it makes her feel better when she hears about my boyfriend. Jason and I are still together secretly because neither of us can seem to stop having sex with each other. Kelly thinks we never were together and Carey thinks Jason broke up with me. I'm sure they would both be hurt if they knew the truth. Honestly, I am in love with Carey and Jason is in love with Kelly but Jason and I can't stop loving each other. I know one day Jason and I will have to call it quits but right now we both have everything we want and Carey and Kelly are unwittingly the perfect covers. c Lustyville 2007 Please send comments to lustyville@yahoo.com and check out more of this story and my other stories at: http://groups.yahoo.com/group/lustyville