Date: Thu, 05 Sep 2002 23:58:20 -0400 From: Jeff Wilson Subject: W.A.R. Chapter 1 Your word of warning: While I've been writing most of my life, this is my first attempt at sending to Nifty. So I'm sorry if the formatting is screwed up. I'll eventually figure it out. This story will deal with feelings and issues that may not be suitable for all readers. There is some bad language, and eventually full frontal nudity and sexual situations. Also, the main character tends to speak before he thinks, which will get him into trouble down the line. The story is mostly written, and it's rather big. But hopefully it will be worth your time. No animals were harmed during the writing of this story. Enjoy! - Jeff W. W.A.R -- Part One: Black Summer Chapter One -- A Day at the Park by Jeff Wilson As I was walking through the park, I saw some kids playing on the swings. My swings, at least they used to be. I had to give them up when I moved on to the ball field. That happens I guess. Those swings had belonged to someone else before me, and they would belong to someone else after these kids were through with them. I watched these new kids for a while. Fat kids. Skinny kids. One was bald, thanks to a summer buzz cut. One had red hair that was curly and obviously too long for the heat wave we were experiencing. One kid had green hair. No accounting for taste. He will be the one that the kids look back on when they were older and wonder what ever happened to him. He'll probably end up a nice normal kid. I moved on to my new area of the park. The ball field was mostly yellow now. The green had long since been bleached out of the field by the June heat. Pennsylvania isn't supposed to be this hot! Ninety-seven degrees on June 16. That is just not right! The rains of April and May were now long forgotten. I stood in my usual spot on that yellow field. Staring at a little ball being thrown by a boy whose name I never bothered to learn and being hit by a boy whose face I had probably seen in school. It flew to the second baseman, who caught it. We won again. 16 wins, 3 losses. I hit another homerun. That makes ten for the year. I'm the league leader. I don't know how. It's not like I'm some big hulking monster. I'm actually kind of skinny, and my arms don't have a lot of meat on them. But the coach says my bat speed is the fastest he's seen for a thirteen-year old. I dragged myself off of that yellow field and started my journey home again. I trudged back through the heat. Back past the swings that used to be mine. New kids had taken the place of the ones I'd seen before. They were even younger than the ones that now were gone. I could have easily knocked them off of my swings. I could have reclaimed what once was mine. But I knew it was too late. A boy my age couldn't swing any more. I could watch a boy throw a ball. I could try to hit that ball. I could catch that ball. But I could not swing. The boy I used to be could swing all day long, but the boy I had become could not. So I marched past the swings. Past the post office. Past the store. Past the church. And past my house. I marched all the way to the river. There was a nice park where the heat seemed a little less lethal. The grass was still green there, barely. I sat on a bench and watched the boats go by. Small boats. Big Boats. An occasional barge. My baseball cap seemed to be welded to my head by sweat. My uniform was an extra layer of skin. My hair dripped water down my face and neck. I watched boys running around, playing at my park. Running around with their summer tans and happy faces. I just wanted them to go to some other place. They had long ago chased away any animal who might have decided to crawl out of its hiding place. "Are you okay, Billy... Billy!" I jumped. "Huh... Wha..." I was really out of it. I didn't even recognize who was talking to me. "Billy, you look like crap. What's wrong?" The blurry figure talking to me continued talking. I started to realize who it was, it was Brett. There are times when you just do not want to talk to anyone, even your best friend. He continued talking, but I was still having trouble getting myself together. "Dude, you don't look good at all. Are you all right?" Now, I didn't want to be mean. Bret was a good friend, very supportive. But at that moment, I didn't want to talk to him. I knew that I was running the risk of crying like a baby if I did. But Bret was persistent. He knew that something was wrong with me, and he wanted to help. Finally I snapped. "Do you know what I did today Brett? Do you really want to know? I played cards with my grandma. She didn't even know what the cards were... All she could do was flip over the cards. That's it." "Oh no, is she getting worse?" Brett knew my grandma very well. He came over often and, having no grandparents of his own, became another grandson to her. She would often take care of us both when we were little. That's how we became so close. "She doesn't even know who I am anymore, Bret! Remember when she used to bring us here? She'd bring us here and we'd play while she'd sit here on this bench. She always fed the ducks. They'd come right up to her. She'd feed the ducks and we'd play. Now she can't even feed herself! And those stupid kids scared the fucking ducks away! She'd take me to the park, and I'd swing on the swings. And she'd push me. Now I push her in a wheelchair. Pretty cruel irony isn't it. I... I can't deal with it Brett. I really can't. And you want to know what the worst thing is? You can tell that she's still in there. Trapped. Stuck in a body that can't do anything anymore." I was starting to lose it. Bret was becoming blurry again. I had to get out of there. "That sucks dude." "I can't take it. I really can't!" Brett was a blur again, and I knew if I kept talking to him I was going to start bawling. "Dude, don't cry." "It's not fair, man! It's not fucking fair! Why is this happening? Why did God let this happen! I hate it!" My whole head seemed even hotter than before. The kids that had been playing became little blurs. I was trying to hold myself together, but instead I sat there snuffling. Unable to really let go, but not able to stop. I couldn't get a solid breath of air. Instead I was breathing in rapid huffs. "Billy. This stuff happens. I know it's horrible and it's not fair, but it's life, dude. Look, all of my grandparents are dead and..." "What the fuck are you tryin' to say?" This was my chance to escape. "I was just..." "Are you saying my grandma's gonna die? Well she's NOT, okay? She's gonna snap out of it and be all right! She's not gonna die, and fuck you for saying that she is!" "But I didn't say that. I..." "Fuck you!" I got up and walked as fast as I could to get out of there. Bret didn't follow me, that was good. I couldn't deal with him right now. I knew he was trying to be helpful, I really did. But I just couldn't take it. Deep down I knew he was right. I knew that my old grandma wasn't coming back, that in a way she was already dead. But I didn't want to face it, not yet... That's it for Chapter One. Let me know what you think by writing to vicioussquirrel@hotmail.com The whole first part is already done, but I'm going to space them out. I hope you enjoyed it!