Date: Thu, 26 Sep 2002 23:39:27 -0400 From: Jeff Wilson Subject: W.A.R. Chapter 5 Your word of warning: Lots of swearing in this chapter. This one's not easy. W.A.R. Part One: Black Summer Chapter Five -- The Black Eye Incident "Where the fuck have you been?" Those were not the words I was expecting when I walked in the door. My dad was known to swear, but never the F-word, and never to me. This was not good. He must have found out that I took the video. I was in deep trouble. "I was at Bret's why..." "You were at Bret's." "Yeah..." "So tell me something... What the fuck were you doing at Bret's instead of the ballpark?" "Huh? The ballpark?" "Yes, the fucking ballpark. And don't even think about telling me that you forgot." He was sitting in his chair. The scowl he was giving me was something I'd never seen from him before. "I didn't go." "I know that, dipshit! I was there!" "What?" "I told you last night that I was going to go! I took time off work. I go to the ball game to watch my son. And you don't even fucking show up! And then... Oh this is really good... I ask the coach, "Where's my son?" You know what he says? He says you called and told him we had a family emergency!" "I didn't tell him that..." "Don't fucking lie to me boy! Don't even think about lying to me right now! So I rush home, thinking God forbid something has happened to your grandmother, or your mother! And I find out that your mother has no idea where in the hell you are! That was two hours ago. So I sat here for two hours calling everywhere. No one knows where you are! No answer at Bret's house. Not even a fucking note to tell us where you went! Now I want to know what you're going to do about it?" "What do you mean?" "Well, what the fuck do you think I mean? You're gonna call that coach and apologize for lying. You're going to apologize to your mother for worrying her and not telling her where you were going. And you're going to apologize to me for costing me time at work and making me look like a fucking ass!" Now, it would have been wise for me to have said I was sorry right then and there and take whatever punishment that was coming. That would have been smart. But for some reason, instead of being smart, I ended up being a smart ass. "Well how the hell was I supposed to know that you were going to actually show up this time? You didn't even promise that you would be there. You said you'd try! And even when you promise to be there, you lie. So how the hell was I supposed to know that you were going to be there? You don't care about me! All you care about is work!" "Well why in the hell do you think I work?!?" "Because you like it more than you like me and mom!" I threw my bookbag on the floor. "What!?!? No! How do you think you get to eat, huh? I don't see you planting a garden! And are you making your own clothes? Because if I didn't work, you'd be walking around naked! I work because I have to, not because I want to! You don't think I'd rather be at home with you and your mother? Are you that fucking dense?" "NO! You're a liar! You said you'd be there last week and you weren't. You tell me you'll be there all of the time. And you're never there! You lie every time! If you loved me more than work you'd have showed up at least once! You're a liar and I FUCKING HATE YOU!" "Don't you use that word with me! You take that back, boy!!!" "MAKE ME!!!" That was when it all went to hell. My dad jumped up out of that chair so fast that it scared me. In fact, it scared me so much that I tried to run away. But when I did, I tripped over my bookbag and went down hard. My head hit the coffee table on the way down and made a loud cracking sound as I hit the table square on my right eye. It really, really hurt! I've been hurt before, but this was awful, terrible, horrible pain. I was in so much pain I couldn't even cry! My dad tried to help me. "Oh my God! Billy! Let me see it!!" "NO!! GET THE FUCK OFF ME!!!" That was when my mom came in. "What is going on in here? I can hear you across the... Oh my God! Billy!! What happened? What did you do to him?!?" "I didn't do anything! He tripped!" My mom ran to me and picked me up to a seated position, and that's when the tears started. I was really bawling. Not just because of my eye. The argument with my dad had hurt me just as badly as the table had. "Well don't just stand there! Get him a bag of ice! I'll take him to the hospital, you watch mom! We'll talk about what we're going to do about this later!" My dad went to get the ice while my mom tried to get me to clam down. "Billy... Billy, you have to settle down. You're making it worse." "I broke my eye!" I sobbed. "No, you didn't break your eye. You can't see because you've had your hand over your eye the whole time. Now, before we do anything, listen to me. Did your dad do this to you? Tell me the truth." "No. He yelled at me, but he didn't hit me. I tripped over my bookbag and fell." "Okay." Dad came back with the ice. "Here Billy, put this on there." "Don't touch me!" I turned away from him and grabbed on to my mom. My mom had to physically pull my hand off of my eye to put the ice on it. While she did, she examined the damage. The good news was that I could still see. The bad news was that there was two of everything. Mom said I had double vision. I would definitely have a black eye. I was still crying, but I wasn't bawling anymore. I walked out to the car holding that bag of ice on my eye, clutching my mom and whimpering like a three year old. It felt like I hit myself in the face with a hammer. My mom gave dad some instructions then got into the car. My dad came to my mom's window. "Billy? Billy?" I didn't look at him. I closed my left eye and turned away. Tears were still escaping from my good eye. "Billy, I'm sorry. I'm sorry I yelled at you and I'm sorry I scared you. I love you, boy!" I didn't answer. I just kept my eyes closed. Mom whispered something to him and then started the car. Once we were on the road, I opened my eye and looked at the road. The tears were still coming, but I was beginning to get used to the pain. It felt like someone was taking a knife and pushing it under my eye and pulling it out, over and over again. "He is sorry, Billy. He loves you very much. It's just that he's so tired from having to work so hard." I closed my eye again and turned toward the window. I didn't want to hear her defend him. I hated him. He hurt me. No, he didn't touch me, but he hurt me. And no bag of ice was going to make the pain I was feeling go away. That's wraps up Chapter 5. Not an easy Chapter to write, or read. Remember, these are very stressful times for Billy and his parents. And stress can make people do things that they normally wouldn't do. Got coments? Think I stink at this writing thing? Let me know! 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