Date: Fri, 09 Mar 2001 11:44:22 -0600
From: Jim Bob <jim72401@swbell.net>
Subject: Why Me - Chapter 10

Author's note: I must apologize to all the readers for the extraordinarily
long delay in posting this chapter.  The delay was not due to a lack of
love for this story because it reflects some events that I hold very dear
to my heart.  Okay, so if you gotta know I have just undergone a messy
breakup and it's been kinda hard on me.  I'm back in the groove now so the
finishing chapters should be forthcoming pretty soon.

I love reader feedback so if you wish to e-mail me, my address is
jim72401@swbell.net.

Dedication: To the loving memory of Marcus Aaron, sweet little sixteen.  I
still miss you sweetie even after 4 hard years.  There's a hole in my heart
that will never be replaced but the fond memories of our time in the sun
and the love we showered each other with warm me continually.  I love you,
MAC.  Peace and love to your Mom and Aunt Wilma.

This story is protected by copyright. You may copy this file for your own
personal enjoyment but any reproduction for gain or profit will be swiftly
dealt with in a court of law.


Why Me Thumbnail

Since it has been so long since I started this story and then let it ride
for a long time I offer this brief synopsis.  Richard Dean has an encounter
at a local cruisy 'tea room' and his best friend, Chad, discovers him
there.  Richard is confused and has feelings for his best friend, Chad, and
tries to block them by staying drunk.  There is an attempt at suicide but
he passes out and ends up in the hospital.  Later, he is caught by a young
cop back at this 'tea room' after he has built up his courage drinking.
This encounter starts him back on track.  The cops (who are a gay couple as
Richard is to find out later) suggest that Richard get help from a man who
owns a electronics repair shop.  Mr. Jenkins, the shop owner, is able to
help Richard cope with his homosexuality.  Richard finds out that the
impetus for Mr. Jenkins motives is that his own son had been gay and ran
away because he was ashamed to tell his parents.  Mr. Jenkins had searched
for him but to no avail.  Richard, out of gratitude, tries to locate his
long lost son, Tony, and is successful in reuniting them and Tony's lover
from High School.  Richard discovers that he is not as alone as he thinks
and that his best friend, Chad, also has the same feelings for him.  They
find out about several other gay people and become friends with several of
them.  I hope this thumbnail helps.


Why Me?  Chapter 10

They laid Eric down on the sofa in the den.  "What the fuck happened to
him?" Chad asked.  Jon said speedily "We went to the park and you know
where the tower overlooks the dam?  Well, we were at the base of the tower
and two of Eric's old friends came over and they had a 'stash' of new shit
and they kept provoking him until he finally gave in to get rid of them and
took a hit.  I couldn't stand by and approve so I walked up the path.
Pretty soon his two bud's came running up the path shouting that I had
better go back and help him.  When I got there he was delirious and ranting
and raving, just waving his arms wildly.  I don't know what they had since
it was rolled up in a baggie and I've never done drugs so I had no idea
what it was.  The container is still down at the park I think, it's empty
though.  What should we do?  What are we going to do?"

"The first thing is to calm down.  We're not helping him by not thinking
clearly." Chad said.  Remembering his training from Scouts he did begin to
monitor Eric's breathing and pulse.  His pulse was thready and his
breathing was ragged but his cardiovascular system had not shut down.

Richard nor Chad had ever been exposed to drugs so they were at a loss.
Richard thought of Tony, knowing he lived on the streets a while and called
him to come over and do it quickly.  Moments later the antique van pulled
up in front of Richard's and Tony came in and they related to him what had
occurred.

"No choice but to take him to the Emergency Room, guys.  Some of this crap
they throw out can be deadly ."  Tony said.  He picked up the phone and
dialed 911.

"911.  What is your emergency, fire, police or ambulance."  The voice on
the receiver said.

"Patch me through to Officer MacLaughlin - this is a life or death
situation." Tony said.

The operator complied with Tony's request and pretty soon Mac was on the
other end of the line.

"Mac, Tony Jenkins here.  Is this line secure?" Tony asked.

"Not really.  Where can I call you?" Mac asked.

"Richard - give your number to Mac." Tony said.

Richard gave the number to Mac and they waited nervously by the phone.  It
seemed like ages before it rang while in reality it was only a few seconds.

"Mac, we have a situation.  One of the kids got hold of some bad drugs, I
think.  He's delirious.  ..........Yeah, we're heading for the ER right
now..........  One of his friends was with him but didn't witness the drugs
or how they were administered...............  He did mention that the
wrapper was still down at the park.  Oh, okay, I'll have him meet you there
as quickly as he can, down by the tower by the dam.." Tony said.

"You, sorry but I don't know your name, go meet Officer MacLaughlin down at
the tower and help him find the baggie.  It's the fastest way we can
identify what Eric has ingested." Tony said.

"But I want to go with Eric, please." Jon begged.

"I'm sorry but to help Eric you need to find that baggie and get it to
Mac." Tony said and they lifted Eric up and carried him to the antique van.
Tony rode with Eric in the back and Richard drove.

"Richard, who are these guys anyway?" Tony asked.

"The one back there with you is Eric and his buddy is Jon.  Eric's has been
through all kinds of Hell and is trying to get his life turned around.  He
used to run with a wild crowd and he comes from a bad family environment."
Richard replied.

"Jon's a senior in High School and he's a normal kid.  Say's he's never
used drugs and I tend to believe him." Chad said.

  When they arrived at the ER they got Eric inside as quickly as they could
and told the Triage Nurse all the details that they knew including the fact
that Mac was bringing in the container for identification.  The Triage
Nurse called the Nurse's Station and asked them to bring a gurney and move
Eric back to a cubicle.  She then began an attempt to contact a responsible
adult at Eric's house.  All of a sudden Eric's body went stiff as a board.
The Nurse reached for Eric's jugular vein and held her nose close to his
mouth.  She then picked up the paging mike and announced "Code Red Triage
Room - Stat".  She then ushered the boys out in the hall just before 3
staff members pushing a huge red cart came flying down the hall and into
the triage room.

Richard, Chad and Tony stood outside the Triage Room listening to "Breathe
two three four five breathe two three four five" coming from the Triage
Nurse, then "Stand back!".  They had seen enough medical shows to know what
was happening and as they looked at each other tears started to run down
their cheeks.

"This can't be happening." Richard cried as Chad and Tony embraced him.  A
friendship that had blossomed out of the most somber of circumstances was
possibly about to come to an end.  Eric had turned the corner after those
first encounters with Richard and was quickly becoming one of Richard and
Chad's best friends, one they could confide their innermost secrets with.
And now, in a moment of succumbing to peer pressure, his very life was in
the balance.  From within the room they heard the "Stand Clear" again and a
strange sizzling sound.  Then a monotonous buzzing sound changed to a beep
beep beeping sound signaling hope for Eric.  A relieved look came over the
face of the three men waiting outside the door. Two of the staff members
opened the door and they rolled Eric out on a Gurney followed by the Triage
Nurse.

"How's he doing?" Richard asked.

"I won't try and fool you.  He suffered cardiac arrest and we were able to
revive him.  He's still not out of the woods.  How much longer before your
friends get here with the 'poison' he ingested?" the Nurse said forcing her
face into a scowl as she mentioned the drug that Eric had taken.

"They should be here soon.  They just had to go over by Riverside Park top
pick up the bag."  Chad said.

"And no one knew how he got the drugs into his system?" the Nurse asked.

"The guy that was with him at the park couldn't watch him do something
stupid so he walked off just before he took the drugs." Richard answered.

"At least one of them was smart.  Pity this one couldn't have been that
bright." the Nurse said.  "You guys can stay here but since you aren't
family I can't let you in the room with him.  The desk got in touch with
his brother and he was to contact the rest of his family.".

Jon and Mac had located the suspect plastic bag and were heading for the
hospital.  Jon had never ridden in a squad car before, especially one with
lights and siren blasting.  Under other circumstances it might have been a
thrill to go racing through the streets but he was wrapped up in grief.
"Jon, do you know who gave Eric the drugs?" Mac asked.  "Yes sir."  and Jon
divulged the names of the bastards that had duped his newfound best friend
into ingesting something that might end up killing or permanently harming
him.  "Okay, well we will get them and hopefully the assholes that supplied
them with the drugs.  Not a word about any of this to anyone other than an
Officer or someone from the D.A.'s office.  If word gets out, who knows
what might happen.  Understood?" Mac said.  Jon only nodded his head in
agreement.

Richard, Chad and Tony stood outside the door when they spotted Mac and Jon
coming hurriedly down the hall.  They held up a plastic bag with another
bag inside it and Richard tapped on the door to Eric's room.

The Nurse came out and reached to take the bag from Mac.  Mac drew back his
hand and said that he had to go with her and protect the chain of evidence
so the two of them walked off to take the drug residue to the lab.

"How is he?" Jon asked.

"He went into cardiac arrest once and they were able to revive him. The
Nurse said it would be touch and go until they found out what he had
taken." Richard said.  The look on Jon's face was one of sheer horror.
Never in his young life had he had to face something this difficult.

"Goddammit.  It's my fault.  If I had been a stronger person then this
never would have happened." Jon said.

Tony placed his hands on Jon's shoulders and said "Jon, you can't be with
him 24/7 so quit blaming yourself.  The best way to avoid this from
happening again is to let him know that we care deeply about what happens
to him and that his self destructive behavior not only hurts him but the
ones he cares about.  C'mon you guys, I think we need some quiet time to
talk to a Higher Power here." And Tony told the Nurse at the Duty Desk that
if Officer MacLaughlin came back down they would be in the Chapel.  Then
Tony herded the boys off.  They walked silently and went inside the Chapel
and up to the Prayer Rail, each one of them kneeling.  Heads bowed and
muffled cries were heard.

Jon began first with the Lord's Prayer and each one of them joined in.
When the Prayer was over Jon continued "and Dear Lord, please, Please
protect and keep Eric safe.  We need him back.  Make him well again.  We
all need him because we all love him.  We all sin and come short of being
perfect but Eric, above all, has tried to be a better human being so please
don't cut his life short." And with that Jon broke down completely and fell
into a crumpled sobbing heap on the floor of the Chapel.  Richard and Chad
bent over him and gently rubbed his back and ran their fingers through his
hair.  Mac walked in still holding the baggie with the evidence in it.

"Did they get a sample?" Tony asked.

"The lab guy said they had plenty to tell what it was.  I have to get this
to the station and get the fingerprint tech to check it for
fingerprints. If Eric doesn't make it there will probably be Murder Charges
filed against at least a couple of guys." Mac replied.

Richard and Chad helped Jon to his feet and Richard took his shirt tail and
dried the tears from Jon's face.  The guys all walked back to the ER
corridor and noticed an older couple and a boy slightly younger than them
standing outside the door of Eric's room.

"I think that's Eric's parents and his younger brother." Mac said to the
guys as he walked up to introduce himself.  Mac then explained the scenario
that took place that afternoon that put Eric's young life in jeopardy.
Eric's Dad then turned to the boys and yelled "Which one of you little
shit's gave it to him?  C'mon, I'm gonna find out and ..." when Mac stepped
between them and said "Listen to me.  If these guys hadn't been there for
your son, he might be dead right now."  The old man was quieted by his wife
and son and they walked down to a row of chairs in the hall.  Mac seeing
that the situation was under control excused himself to take the evidence
to the station.  The guys watched as what appeared to be a Doctor walked
over to Eric's family and in hushed tones explained to them what Eric had
taken and what the prognosis was.  When the Doctor turned to leave, the old
man muttered repeatedly "Arsenic? Arsenic?".

Jon broke away from the guys and walked over to Eric's family and said "HI,
uh I'm Jon Fox.  Eric and I are good friends.  What did the Doctor say?.

The old man replied "Well, he said that the drugs that Eric took were laced
with Arsenic, pretty high concentration of Arsenic.  They are giving him
some kind of drug to counteract it but it would be a couple of days before
they will know if hey are successful or not."

"Listen, if there's anything I can do I'd be willing to do it.  I've
already given the Officer all the information I have and I'm willing to go
to the wall to see that the scum that gave him this stuff gets what they
deserve." Jon said.

"You know who gave it to him?  Who was it.  I'll rip their heads off and
spit down their throats."  the old man shouted.

"Sir, the Officer asked me not to tell anyone anything about the case."
Jon said.

This answer quieted the old man.  He shook Jon's hand and thanked him for
being there for Eric.  The Nurse came over and told the family that they
were moving Eric to a room on the floor and asked his Father to go to the
registration desk and check him in.  Jon walked over to the door to Eric's
room and watched as they brought Eric's comatose body from the ER.  Eric's
Mother and Brother rose and the three of them followed the gurney out of
the room.  Richard went over and began walking with Jon.

"Jon, do you want us to stay?" Richard asked.

"I don't see any reason.  It's a waiting game right now.  Why don't you and
Chad go on home and if anything changes I'll call you." Jon said.

"We don't have anything to do so we'll stay if you want us here for moral
support." Richard said.

"No.  You and Chad run on home, but give me your home number just in case."
Jon said.

Richard gave him his phone number and he, Chad and Tony left.  Once they
arrived at Richard's, Richard invited Tony in and the guys sat around the
kitchen counter.  There was a long period of silence when Chad asked "Do
you think he will make it?".

"Oh, God, I hope so." Richard replied.

"It's not in our hands, guys." Tony said.

"I know it's not.  Anyone hungry?" Richard said changing the subject and
three sets of hands went up.  Richard called in a pizza order and proceeded
to fix drinks.

 "How's Kurt?" Richard asked.

"He's great.  In fact we're going into the city tonight.  Hit a few clubs
and then back to Kurt's apartment." Tony replied.

"Kurt seems like an all right guy." Chad piped in.

"I think so.  I have always had a warm spot in my heart for Kurt.  We went
all the way through school together, in Scouts together, youth hockey
together, that is until I ran away from home.  Oh, the stories I could tell
- they would make you blush.  We were two hellions.  You can probably tell
he was one built guy when he was your age, worked out all the time and was
on the football team and the track team in High School.  No one messed with
us, mainly because no one would mess with him. I wasn't a shrimp by any
means but he was like Charles Atlas." Tony said.

The Pizza arrived and they sat around eating and quizzing Tony about his
life.  Tony told many tales about their antics when they were in their
teens.  And he recalled a lot of the more tender moments that they shared
before Tony took off for the city.  Then Tony recounted all the problems he
encountered on the streets just to stay alive.  He told them about the high
number of kids that got hooked on dope who had to really do some dirty jobs
'hookin' to stay alive and support their habit. Tony had to leave to get
ready for his evening leaving Chad and Richard alone in the big house
again.  The two of them sat down on the sofa and Richard draped his arm
around Chad's shoulders and they just sat watching each other.

Meanwhile, back at the Hospital, Eric's family and Jon are sitting around
Eric's room keeping vigil over Eric.  His Dad asks if anyone is hungry and
his Mom and Brother both agree that they could eat so they left Jon to
watch over their son and brother.  Once he was alone with Eric he went over
to the bed and held Eric's hand very tightly and a motherlode of tears
streamed down his cheeks.  "Why did you have to do something so stupid?  I
love you, do you hear me, I LOVE YOU.  Eric, please, PLEASE, never ever do
anything like this again." Jon said to the motionless body.  Then the only
sounds in the room were the quiet sobbing of Jon and the spewing noise the
oxygen unit made.  Suddenly Eric stirred in the bed and sat upright.  "I'm
gonna be sick" he yelled and a surprised Jon stood motionless.  Eric tried
to pull back the covers and get out of bed but the side rails impeded his
leaving.  Jon saw a plastic tub and placed it under Eric's head and told
him to "Let it fly.".  Eric wretched his guts up and finished up with
several rounds of dry heaves.  Jon went to the sink and wet a wash cloth
and washed Eric down.

"Jon, is that you?  Where am I?" Eric asked.

"Yes, baby.  It's me.  Don't you recognize me?  You're in the Hospital.
Don't you remember?"  Jon replied.

"It's hard to see you in the dark." Eric said.  The look on Jon's face was
one of abject horror - at this time of the summer it was still broad
daylight plus the lights were on in the room.  Jon stuttered "Uh, hold on
baby.  I have to run up the hall just a minute.  Don't move." And he left
the room and went to the Nurses station to let them know that Eric was
awake and apparently blind.  The Nurse paged the staff Doctor and told Jon
to go back to Eric's room but not to upset him.  Jon went back to the room
and walked over beside Eric and asked "How are you feeling?  Still sickie
at your stomach?".

"No.  I'm just awfully weak.  What happened to me?  Why am I in the
Hospital?" Eric asked.

"Do you not remember meeting up with those two guys from your shop class at
the park and them giving you some bad drugs?" Jon asked.

"Not really.  The last thing I remember is having breakfast over at
Richard's house."  Eric replied.

"Well, you got some bad drugs and you gave us a scare.  You're in the
hospital for observation now." Jon answered.

"Damn.  Do the 'rents know?" Eric asked.

"They had to call them.  They're in the cafeteria now getting something to
eat.  Eric, I want to be real frank with you and I don't want you to get
upset." Jon said.

"Sure thing, Bud.  I couldn't get mad at you, unless you started running
around on me." Eric answered.

"Bud, you know I care an awful lot about you, don't you?" Jon asked.

"I would have sworn I heard you tell me that you loved me or was that a
dream?" Eric said with a grin on his face.

"All right, yes, I have fallen in love with you and that's what makes this
so difficult.  Eric, if you choose to use any type of street drugs I cannot
be with you.  I love you too much to see you destroy your life and mine
also." Jon said.

"Whoa, Dude.  I mean like what's a 'J' every now and then.  That can't hurt
anything." Eric replied.

"There's something you don't know about me that you should.  I hope it
won't make any difference.  The truth is I am a recovering drug addict.  A
couple of years ago I questioned my sexuality and had big problems
accepting it so I turned to marijuana and it graduated into more serious
street drugs.  I ended up in this same Hospital after an overdose.  Hell, I
almost died Eric.  The reason I left you alone with those two dudes this
afternoon is that I felt a weakness and had to leave.  I hope you
understand." Jon said.

"No problemo buddy and Jon, I think that my serious case of the 'hots' for
you has developed into something a little more serious now turn on the
lights so I can see that beautiful face of yours." Eric said.

Jon couldn't help it and he broke down sobbing, crying his heart out.  His
realization that Eric might face a lifetime of never seeing the happiness
in his face was more than he could take.  That along with the affirmation
that Eric had strong feelings for him also was creating this 'sweet & sour'
moment.

"What's wrong, Jon?  I hope that those are tears of joy." Eric said.  Jon
pulled himself together just long enough to reply "Yes, they are Eric.
They most certainly are." And he moved to the bed and placed his lips on
Eric's and gave him a soft tender kiss.

As their lips separated the door to the room swung open.  A man in a long
white coat walked in.  He announced himself as Dr. Abrams.

"How are you feeling Eric?" the Doctor asked.

"Weak, Doc.  Would someone please turn on the damn lights?" Eric asked.

"Eric, we need to talk about a few things first.  Just lay back and relax.
Do you remember the earlier events that caused you to end up in the
Hospital?" the Doctor asked.

"It's all kinda hazy.  I understand I got a hold of some bad dope." Eric
answered.

Doctor Abrams began "Well Eric, the 'dope' that you ingested was laced with
arsenic.  Arsenic is basically a metal and once it gets into your body it
does strange things.  It's too early to know exactly what damage has been
done or to what extent.  We're going to have to run a lot of test in order
to try and prevent any permanent damage to your system.  In many cases the
metal can get in the nervous system and, in layman's terms, short out
certain body functions.  Sometimes these functions are permanently affected
and sometimes it's only temporary.  Right now the only damage that we can
detect is in your eyes.  Don't get alarmed, Eric.  This may be only a short
term problem.  I need to look in your eyes."

The Doctor took his opthalmoscope and began the check on Eric's eyes.  "Let
me know what you see." the Doctor said.

That's all for now folks.  Hope you enjoyed it. If there are any Medical
Professionals reading this story, please remember that this is a FICTIONAL
story and any semblance to ailments, diagnosis, etc are totally fictional.

Comments are welcome, good or bad.  Reply to: jim72401@swbell.net