**************************************************************************** * "NEW TO TEACHING LOVE" * * (part 1) * * by Vince Water 9/20/04 * **************************************************************************** | Copyright 2004-2006 by Vince Water Corrected 4/06 | ---------------------------------------------------------------------------- Author's Note: This story continues from the 'New to Love' series of twenty story parts. You can find these free texts (if you haven't read them) on the Nifty Archive at: www.Nifty.Org/ - click on AMERICAN INDIAN STORIES BY VINCE WATER... from their homepage and select the NEW-TO-LOVE folder amongst my other writings. This second series can be found in the NEW-TO-TEACHING-LOVE folder. I'll continue to post my stories with the Nifty Archive. David is doing a great job with his website by posting our stories and acts within the free speech rights protected by the First Amendment here in these United States. I'm correcting the 'New to Teaching Love' story texts as of April 2006. Sketches of Mike, Jesse, Running Water, Jake and grandfather have been rendered by one of my Readers. To view them, join my Yahoo! Group on the Internet: www.groups.yahoo.com/group/NtTLStoriesAndSketches I welcome Reader comments, questions and suggestions to what I've written. Email me at: Vince_Water@Yahoo.com This story is a work of fiction. It depicts love acts between men with men and boys and is intended for adults over the age of 21. I'm writing about more than sexual encounters but the feelings that develop between people. Mike and Jesse strive to gain acceptance in the Blackfoot tribe for being a couple while helping others who share their spirit to find happiness for themselves. Here is their continuing saga. I lay dreamily in our bed. My parents have long since returned to Indiana (no longer do I think of that State as my home). Eli Kie has been captured and awaits trial for murder while the charges against me have been dropped. Simon eagerly awaits our return to see him (to enjoy a hot tub get together) but for now, Jes and I are enjoying a nice honeymoon after marrying. We're getting to know each other better from outside ourselves. And, of course, there's lots of love making. "Silly!" Jesse chides after Reading his lover's thoughts. "Most of your day dreaming has yet to unfold." I stretch lazily beside my Indian lover. "Yeah, I know." A sigh springs from my lips. My thoughts are directed at Jesse so he can Hear them in his head without relying on clumsy words. :When will all these troubles of ours blow away?: :Soon, love.: Jes turns himself to cuddle with me. His slim form presses onto my body in a meeting of brown and white. We've been laying on our backs for a while to dry the love making from our bellies. That sweet scent fills my nose. I'm breathing it in, smiling, until a glance at the clock shows that my parents are soon to arrive for dinner. :We have a little more time.: I've caught the plea in my lover's thoughts. We kiss each other. Sweetly. There's longing on his face. It's an adult expression you wouldn't expect to see coming from a child. Jesse is twenty three years old. You wouldn't think so because of his youthful features that lend him a teenage appearance. He's shy to strangers. That comes from being autistic where he's hidden inside himself for most of his life. My love has brought him out. Jesse clutches my shoulders to pull himself fully on top of me. There's fire in his dark eyes that rekindles my passion. Our swelling cocks touch. A gentle rubbing at first with nice male thrills until we're caught up in fierce love making. My hands lower to his small humping ass. I'm pulling over it to drive his body against mine. Deep tonguing kisses. A rush of breaths through our noses. The rhythmic beat of our cocks battling towards completion. This act of bodily love joins with how we feel for each other in our hearts, our heads and being of one spirit. It feels so right. Jes spreads his legs so I can finger his hole. His musky scent is brought back to my nose, getting me real excited and tempting me to fuck him. Hmmm. I remember that first time when my love was spent in him. He shares in those sweet memories filling my head. It was in his mother's garage when we'd first joined our bodies. I was kissing his little butt. That drew my tongue inside to find his hole. My hands spread his cheeks apart and between gasps for air, I rimmed him good to both our satisfaction. Spit was put in. My cock ached to get in there so in a standing crouch behind him, we joined. Jesse held onto some boxes. He easily took my stabs that didn't hurt him as much as I expected them to. But, of course, I didn't know that Ron had already broken him in. A twinge of sadness comes to me. :Mike. You were the first man to fill with me with more than just sperm.: I'm nodding in agreement. I've given this man my full love. Another fond memory fills my head. Our first naked embrace was in his mother's front room where I'd been put on the floor to sleep. Jesse had come to me late in the night. We belly rubbed and though it was exciting, I couldn't come out. He did. My cock was too shy because I'd never had sex with anyone before. I was getting off by pushing my cock down between my rubbing thighs. That was a boy's lone act and an unusual way to beat off that didn't prepare me to release 'forward'. I shyly showed Jes how I did it while he held me close, his dick slipped between my thighs next to mine. That's how I managed to cum with my new lover. :You haven't done it that way since,: Says Jesse. :No need to. You've made a man out of me.: My hands tighten around his flexing ass. I really like his butt a lot! It's small like a boy's, shapely and very brown. He enjoys having me stick in him there as much as I enjoy giving it to him. Butt fucking is great! A deep longing fills my lover to connect our bodies as we are always Connected. :Do you want to enter me, love?: :No. I'm too close!: Our held breaths explode from our mouths followed by that sharp male release from our bodies. Ahh! Warm spurts are felt against my belly. Pleasure fills our heads. I hear Jesse's sigh of contentment while I'm catching my breath. Our heated bodies relax. We surrender to that mellow sensation of relief that follows. Jesse's belly quakes. I peer into his face for the reason and notice that his eyes are cast above my head at something. His suppressed giggles finally erupt. I'm trying to turn my head around to see what's so humorous. :Brown Bear is giving me a smug grin,: explains Jesse. That's my lover's stuffed animal propped up between our pillows. Watching. :Is he saying anything about us... Ah. What we've just done?: :No,: Answers Jesse. :He's just smiling.: Jes peers deep into my eyes so I kiss him, our feelings of love Passing to each other that feels like a blanket of joy. I'm so happy to have this guy in my arms! "You make me very happy too, love." My hands lift from my lover's cheeks and become entangled in his silky long hair. An eagle's feather is felt against my fingers. Yes. He is that Indian warrior whom I've longed to be with since I were a boy. My former self in a past life was loved by Brave Pah-kaps-owopspec (Bad-eyes) who'd whisked him from Fort Union to live with his Blackfoot Tribe. All that Christopher Walker was is a part of me now. I'm no longer that dumb guy, Mike Yager. My lover in this lifetime has named me 'Short Hair'. "You have found the path to your life," says Jesse. "Yeah. With your help." These past two weeks have been very eventful; wonderful! I met Jes-ee-ah when his mom was attending my class for MS-Word. How shy her son had been, not even taking my hand I offered him in greeting. Winna gave me a ride home. That's when the first stirrings of love filled my heart. Jes didn't reveal his own feelings for me at the time but he knew of mine for him. That's his special gift. To Peer into others by touching them and know what they're thinking. :You have this gift too, love.: Jes means how I'm able to Glean things from people without even having to touch them. I think that Spirit inside us his grandfather had Passed from a Power Bundle is doing that for me. We're also Connected. Not only in thought but how we're given abilities from the other. I'm able to speak Siksika, the Blackfoot tongue from Jesse while his autism isn't as pronounced since I'm filtering out a lot of the noise for him. :It was your love that lifted me from that place I was hiding in myself.: Jes gives me his kiss of thanks. "You're welcome." We peer at each other. His brown face takes on a longing expression when I peer into his eyes. I'm also Seeing his love for me from within. Words spring from my lips. "Ne stoa pinnan jeh ah-eene, Jes-ee-ah." "I love you too, Short Hair." Jesse answered me in English in reply to those old Siksika words he'd taught me. My nose pains me when I prevent tears from forming in my eyes. How much I do love this man! We're startled by a soft knock at our door. "Okay, mom! We're getting up now." I love listening to Jesse's Indian accent when he speaks. "You love everything about me," Jesse whispers. "Ah, yes. That has me overlooking your small faults." "Like what?" Jesse curiously asks. I turn away to stare up at the ceiling while trying to come up with one. Jes begins shaking me so that I'll answer him. "You're too giving to others." Jesse laughs. "Is that such a bad thing?" "No..." Jes had given his butt to Ron. I can't seem to keep that out of my mind. :That man was in need,: Sends Jesse. :He helped me realize that I'm gay.: :I know. I'm no longer mad at Ron for what he did with you.: My thoughts turn deep and guarded when I recall how that happened. Jesse's uncle had been that man's lover for over six years. Late last year, he was away from Ron and that's when Jes and him got together or rather I should say, that horny bastard took advantage of him. Theirs was already a friendship when Running Water had taken Jesse to Ron's trailer after school. Though Jes didn't speak much (from autism that made him shy), Ron suspected that he was gay. He was caught fucking Running Water by Jesse one day and allowed to watch them from then on. Not so much to ensure his silence but they wanted Jes to learn what gay love was about. That awakened his own desire. Ron was all too eager to satisfy him in this. In his butt. :Is yours still aching?: Asks Jesse. "Huh?" I blurt out, startled from my deep thoughts. Oh. A sly grin comes to my lips. I'm wiggling my butt over the bed to find out. "A little." "My uncle's thing is big," comments Jesse. "Not only did you let him fuck you but Simon and me as well. Lots of sperm put in your butt this afternoon." My face is burning. We've reverted to speaking out loud and that makes me feel even more embarrassed. To hear Jes say that, I suppose. Some courage comes to me when I say, "Should have worked my way up from your smaller dicks before giving my ass to Running Water. He even did me twice." Jesse giggles. "Serves you right. Simon has a good size for a boy of his age yet his thing must have felt like only a tickle in your hole." I'm laughing. "Yours, too." I've already admitted to Jes that his uncle's cock is of thickness and reach into my butt to massage my prostate. It's an intense sensation no one has ever given me before from fucking. "I felt Ron's doing that to me too." The smile on my face doesn't fade. Jes has already told me so instead of feeling mad, it excites me. Both our butts are hot to trot. "We'll be giving ourselves to men in need," says Jesse. "Uh-huh." A part of me regrets that I wasn't the first man to be with him. I'm Sensing my lover's sadness. Oh. He's thinking about what happened to Ron. That man was murdered late last year by Trickster Eli Kie. His ghost haunted the trailer I was renting for the summer, guarding over a Power Bundle of the Blackfoot People he had reclaimed from Eli Kie who had taken it from the arms of Shaman Good-eyes where he'd slept in his burial cave since the time of Jesse's grandfather's father. My former self was also murdered by that evil man over a hundred and thirty years ago. Jesse's former self is that very shaman who crafted that Power Bundle but my lover must not Merge with Good-eyes least he lose himself to him. I Merged with Chris by Living all of his memories. I've been changed from who I was yet not so great a change because Chris was younger than me when he died at eighteen. Good-eyes was an old man. He'd possess Jesse completely if he were allowed to come forth in his body to live again. Both Christopher and I have sworn to prevent this from happening! Jes crafted a fragile spell that I'm supporting by my life's energy as a shield against Good-eyes' approach. It is draining on me though. Jesse caresses my face with the palm of his hand. The fierceness in my eyes fade and I close them. A deep breath fills my lungs. :Grandfather will find that Omaha Shaman who can help me,: assures Jesse. I open my eyes to peer up at my lover. He gives me a gentle smile. Hope fills us. :Until then, take whatever you need from my very being to remain the young man that I love.: Jesse nods while going deep into thought. I try following where my lover has gone in his head but I can't. :Jesse?: His eyes came back into focus. I'm given his tender kiss that drives away all of our troubling thoughts. My left hand lowers to Jesse's butt, outlining its shape. Ahh. It's very nice. My forefinger slips between his cheeks to rub over his hole. I know that he likes that. A pleasant tingling goes through my cock. I've enjoyed joining my body to his in this ultimate gay act of love. I'm looking towards our bedroom door. Winna had knocked earlier so we should be getting up from bed and preparing ourselves for dinner. In answer to this thought, Jes rolls off me. My eyes fall down his slim brown chest. He's not that wet there. I'm looking down mine. Our mingling cum is found on my belly and catches into my groin hair. Its sweetness is breathed in. When I sit up, Jes slides off our bed and prances over to his dresser. My eyes are stuck to his butt like tree sap. It's a nice shape. Brown cheeks that stick out nicely from his body yet small like a boy's. My eyes lower to his long legs. His arms too are unusually long because of Marfan's Syndrome. Jesse has a very slim body as if he doesn't eat much. Food doesn't seem to stick to his bones though I've been chiding him to try. He has to be careful not to exert himself physically such as playing in sports or even to walk a lot least his heart fail him. Running Water suffers from Marfan's too. He's told me that it'll only be a concern in their old age, fifties or so. Until then, our love making can be passionate and often enjoyed. I marvel at how much lovin' we partook of today. This morning, we got together with Running Water in bed. Well. Me that is since Jesse won't have sex with his uncle because that's considered incest even though we're all guys and no baby can come of it. This afternoon, I fended off a boy's sexual advances but he chased down Running Water's ass. That made a man out of Simon. My butt got taken by everyone. That's why it's aching me. I stretch my body with my hands reaching back to the pillows. That upsets Brown Bear who falls against my right shoulder. He's gently placed back where he belongs. There's a cool sensation from my belly that reminds me of our recent love making. We belly rubbed before our nap and afterwards. A deep yawn fills my mouth. I try shaking the weariness from my head. Man! I'm still feeling tired and could use more rest but there's no time. My parents are soon to arrive for dinner. That's a sobering thought. Jesse returns to our bed. I catch the shy expression on his face when he reveals a cloth and bottle of water in his hands. "To clean up with," he explains. I'm smiling. "You prepared for this?" I ask teasingly. Jes nods. He wipes my lower belly and groin dry of cum. After folding the cloth inwards, he pours water over it and finishes cleaning me. Then his own belly is rinsed. Another yawn springs from my mouth. I lay back down with my eyes closing. The bed feels so good and sleep would easily claim me if it wasn't for Jes. I'm startled by his tongue wiggling into my navel. His long hair also tickles my chest so I sit up in surrender, watching his head lowering to my groin. I'm gasping out sharply. :Your thing is leaking a little,: explains Jesse. I'm squirming over the bed. :Too ticklish!: :Are you awake now?: Jes gives me a sly grin. I scoot over to my lover whose face comes to mine so we can kiss. That leads to several more kisses. I'm pulling his lithe body into my arms, turning him onto his side for a tight hug. We grow passionate. :We'll get wet bellies again,: warns Jesse. :Yeah. You're right.: I release a tense breath and let him go. :Tonight, love.: I'm laughing out loud. :After enduring my parent's visit, I'll be using our bedroom for what it's intended for - sleep.: :Tomorrow morning then.: That's a wonderful thought. I take a quick look around Jesse's bedroom knowing that this is my room too. It's our sanctuary from all those problems facing us. We'll be sleeping here in each other's arms. Making love. A deep breath is taken into my lungs. It's gently released. Jes grins. The radiance of his being shines from his face and my heart fills with the love this young man has for me. Without moving my lips, I Send my worded thoughts and even how I'm feeling to Jes through our special Connection. He Answers me. We both Share the sweet sensations from just having made love and our deep feelings for each other. A truth has been whispered in our ears by that Spirit dwelling inside us. New to love ourselves, we'll teach others like us how to find love for themselves instead of falling into despair. "Are you ready?" Jesse asks. He means facing what this night will bring. I'm slowly nodding my head. My lover and I arise from bed to get dressed. Not in the good clothes worn when we lunched with my parents but in casual clothes. I'm not looking forward to dining with them tonight. Jes offers me a grin to help lift me from my gloomy mood. New underwear is taken from the package. That reminds me of the 'wet' pair I've left back at my trailer. Jes slips into some jeans that closely matches the blue jeans I'm about to put on. We exchange knowing grins. White shirts are donned and we look each other for a final inspection. He looks great. I'm given my lover's approval. We hold hands as if never letting each other go. We'll no longer hide who we are to each other. My dad already suspects. I won't come right out and tell mom tonight that I'm gay if she hasn't already been told when dad drove her back to their motel room but I won't hide my feelings for Jes in front of them any longer. Jesse sniffs the air. "Mom is cooking up something good." I'm nodding. My eyes haven't left my lover in admiration of his handsome appearance. His brown face, neck and arms are in contrast to his shirt stretched over his body. His nipples are sticking out. He's been looking me over in much the same way. From Sharing our thoughts and emotions, I know that he finds me handsome. A cute looking white guy. My arms bulge with strength. He likes the fine hair covering my body that tickles his smoothness when we're holding each other. I'm aching to do that right now with him. Jesse embraces me. He turns to look into a mirror hanging above his chest of drawers. I see myself holding this young Indian man, our arms around each other with chests pressing together. I'm a little taller than him. When his hands reach low for my butt, I grasp his nice curves sticking out from the seat of his pants. We've put our love in each other there. Jes turns away from the mirror to rest his head on my shoulder. The eagle's feather dances about his long black hair flowing down his back. Ahh. My Indian warrior... :And your squaw,: Says Jesse. My lover humps his butt I'm grasping. I hump my butt under his hands. It blows my mind that gay guys can both fuck and get fucked. I've discovered how good that can feel to give myself to a needing man. At least a baby won't come from it. "Yours is nice, Mike." Jes squeezes my cheeks while images pop into my head - all the times that he's stuck my pale drum with his brown tom-tom in love's rhythmic beat. My face begins to burn when I See Running Water doing me through his eyes, how that man's savagery differs from Simon's gentle thrusts. I've given my butt to everyone today. Man! I'm really turning into a gay fuck. :Don't be embarrassed, love. It's a human thing to enjoy sex with others.: I pick up on Jesse's longing to have Simon do his ass, to experience what it'll be like to feel that boy's smooth body riding over his. He's only been fucked by hairy white guys. Ron and me. Only Indians have stuck in me so far. My cock feels tight in my pants. We mash them together in our tight hug for thrills. The naughty thought of me sticking into Simon's butt is cast away but not before Jes Saw it. :I'll be the first to break that boy in,: Says Jesse. :He needs to learn in his heart and with his head that fucking isn't love. Ron taught me that.: :I'm worried about us doing that with a minor. Having sex with Simon is against the law and the moral codes of this day and age. Maybe he won't want us to perform that act with him. The boy's too young!: :You worry too much, love. Simon won't tattle on us. Nothing will be forced on that youth yet I've Seen his longing to know what getting fucked is like. He's tried tempting you into doing his butt a few times already.: I remember that. Simon stuck his brown ass at me in a tease. That's all I figured it was at the time so I warned him that he risked getting it raped. If not by me, from some horny guy who wouldn't show the same restraint. He'll learn something alright. How much it hurts at first! :That's why we must do this for him. Our penetration will be gentle and dispel the wrong notion in his head that he must save that part himself for a lover. I didn't.: He means when he gave his butt to Ron. It wasn't done from love on either of their parts. Letting himself get fucked fulfilled that part of Jes that's two spirited while satisfying that man's lust. I know that when we fuck, it's a way to express the feelings in our hearts for each other. We are in love. :By me not being a virgin, did it lessen that act of love when you first expressed it with me in the garage?: Asks Jesse. :No. But afterwards, when you told me that I wasn't the first man to join himself to your body, it really hurt my heart!: :Because you couldn't separate sex from an act of love. You were only Mike then. As Short Hair, you realize this difference don't you? Simon needs to be taught this lesson too.: My hands become very tight around Jesse's butt so he'll stop flexing it. That leaves our mashed cocks tingling in want of yet another release. I breathe out wearily. :All that you've said lays easily in my heart. It's my head that's in turmoil. Mostly about us doing stuff with Simon.: :I know. We are new to love. What we learn will be taught to others like that boy so they'll find happiness for themselves. In turn, we'll become better human beings because of it. That's the path we've chosen in our past lives and in this one.: Jes rubs his soft head against mine. It is soothing. All my troubling thoughts are cast away until I'm left with a good feeling in my heart. A quick glance is taken of our reflection in the mirror. I see us hugging. From within, I See our strong bond that gives us the strength to face life together. We'll never be alone. Jesse peers at our reflection in the mirror. He smiles. I press my lips against his left ear and whisper, "We make a fine looking couple. Wouldn't my parents think so?" My lover's arms tighten around me and I Feel his hope that it will prove so. "My mom does." I barely caught what Jes said. It's echoed more strongly in my head from Sharing our thoughts. He's remembering when his mom walked in on us when we were hugging in her kitchen. Jes had stiffened in my arms. She knew we were a couple but hadn't seen us doing anything until that moment. We feared how she'd react. Winna said that she saw the love in both of us. That we're only expressing what's in our hearts for each other so she didn't want us to feel that it must be kept hidden as if in shame. At least not in her house. Her last words touched our hearts when she told us how happy she was for us both. "That was nice of my mom to say." "Yeah. It was." I'm thinking about my own parents. What will they say about us? "Allow them some time to get over their shock. Remember how mad mom was at you? At me too, though that was mostly her worrying for me." "Of a white guy taking advantage of her young son." I'm laughing bitterly. Winna doesn't know that another man had already fucked him. She must never know least her anger will be directed at Running Water who was Ron's lover. A strange feeling comes over me. :Someday, though... she should be told.: I sense Jesse's reluctance to do so. :Would it not be better if your mom learned about that from us then someone else?: I'm not sure why I Said that. :Have you Gleaned something, love?: Jesse Asks. :I'm not sure. I was against telling your mom about Ron when all of a sudden, it felt wrong.: My eyes close in concentration. Nothing. When I open them, Jes is peering at me with a dark expression on his face. :Our enemy could wield such a weapon against us! Unlike the Trickster's usual wont to craft a clever lie, his strike would come from revealing truth to my mom. Her anger would be directed at Ron, Running Water and then at us. You're right, love. She must be told.: My eyes widen when I recall something else I've Gleaned and had forgotten to tell Jesse about. My hands grab his slim shoulders. :Eli Kie isn't the only one in our tribe working evil! I've Seen this. He has a pupil who has pledged himself to walk behind him into Darkness. A Trickster in training!: "Who is it?" gasps Jesse. My eyes shut tight. It's difficult to recapture what I'd Seen last night when my angry spirit had taken a brief Flight to the Above. :You took that Spirit Flight without me,: Says Jesse. :Our Father has revealed this danger to you.: :To both of us! I didn't See a face, only know that it's someone in the tribe who is helping Eli Kie.: Jesse's shoulders slump. I too feel this added burden. Jesse releases a tense sigh. :It is better to know of the danger than to face it unexpectedly.: He gulps in a breath. :Let's wait a while before having to tell my mom.: :Okay. Eli Kie is on the run so it would be difficult for him to strike out at us.: I guard my next thoughts from Jes. I'm realizing that Ron's diary taken from me by Lieutenant Danielson may already be in Eli Kie's hands. He has only to translate those passages where Ron wrote about fucking Jes and mail them to his mother. Then there's that sick poem of his. I remember how upset I'd been after reading it when I thought Running Water and Jes had been in Ron's bed getting fucked by him in turn. Winna would go to pieces if she read that, fiction though it is. There's also the danger of the police having a copy of Ron's diary. His murder is still under investigation so they'd be interested in translating his accounts that lead up to it. Would they tell Jesse's mom what Ron wrote about them being together? "What are you thinking about, love?" My breath comes out of me in a rush. Jes gives me a knowing look so I cast away my troubling thoughts. Our bedroom is not the place for them. We both take a last glimpse of ourselves in the mirror. Then we separate and head for the bedroom door. Stepping outside, the burdens return to my shoulders. Oh, this night! 'May it pass quickly and with nothing bad happening with my parents,' I pray. My eyes lower in shame. It was a petty thing to ask of our Lord. We enter the kitchen like a pair of shadows. A steaming bowl has been set on the counter. Whatever it contains, it smells good. There are three plates of sliced fruit and vegetables: oranges, strawberries and cucumbers. Winna is frying bread in a skillet and doesn't notice us standing behind her. "Mom? Is there anything we can do to help?" Winna turns her head sharply. "Ah. You can set the table." She points at the pile of plates and silverware she's already taken down from the cabinet. The woman returns to her stove before we could make eye contact. With a sigh, I help Jes bring everything into the dining room. We're setting down plates, napkins and silverware that to my surprise adds up to six. That's when I notice the six unlit candles centered in the table. :Someone is joining us for dinner,: Jesse comments. :I wonder who?: A strong tingling runs down my spine when I Glean something. Not the identity of our unexpected guest but that important news comes with him. We're rushing back to the kitchen. "Mom? There's an extra setting at the table. Who's that for?" "Your grandfather. He called while the two of you were sleeping. When I told him that your parents will be dining here tonight, he asked to join us. Is that alright with you, Mike?" "Of course." Winna peers at me to read my face. Jes takes hold of my hand. "He's my grandfather too and I would be honored to have him over for dinner." Winna is about to check on her fried bread but she pauses from doing so. "Mike? I know how difficult it'll be when your parents realize what my son means to you. Were you, ah... planning on telling them that tonight?" I'm slowly shaking my head. Winna looks at the white shirts we're wearing and our matching blue jeans. I realize why she's asked me that. "My father already knows. He asked me at the restaurant when I was going to tell mom. I told him tomorrow." The woman nods, turning back to her stove. Winna flips the round piece of bread over. It has a nice brown color, like my lover's bottom. Jes shoots me a sly grin. He takes my hand in his. The woman glances back at us, her eyes softening when she looks at her son. On his face is an expression I'm often seeing from him: happiness mixed with his longing to have me at his side. Winna turns to me. My face is revealing this same thing for her son. A soft smile is given us from Winna. Her eyes reveal anxiety for what this night may bring. She's not looking forward to dining with my parents either. When the woman is about to turn back to her stove, I reach out for her arm. "Mother? Thank you for... your understanding." I'm peering at Jesse. He's about to say something but thinks better of it. Winna takes a breath and speaks. "I really didn't have a choice, did I?" She closes her eyes for a moment. "Go into the front room you two and let me finish preparing dinner." I tug on my lover's hand and we pass through the dining room. :It's still difficult for your mother to accept that we're together, isn't it?: :I suppose. She knows there's no separating us now, love. Not after all we've been through in service of our tribe, our Connection, and how you're helping me to be... normal. My mother understands this. It's her heart that aches her. There will be no grandchildren from me for her to cherish.: We reach the couch and sit down. I turn to Jesse. :I'm sorry about that.: :Don't be.: Jes rests his head on me. I look down at our hands when his long fingers tighten around mine. A clasping of brown and white. We're struggling against more than just being gay but of clashing cultures. He's an Indian. I'm white. There's little love lost between our two peoples. Bitter memories of the wars fought between our grandfather's fathers have not been forgotten. The struggle to regain stolen land, sacred objects and even the bones of their ancestors continues today. Ron was helping the Blackfoot with this. So will I. :You have done much already, love.: A deep breath fills my lungs before I answer him. I'm still doing that even though we're often Talking without using our mouths. Sometimes we don't even Send words to each other but Share our feelings and the images flashing in our heads. We're doing that now. I See us finding Good-eyes' Power Bundle that Ron had hidden under the floor boards in his trailer. No longer needing to guard over it, his ghost departed this world for the next. Eli Kie had murdered him. He failed to get the bundle from Ron then and attempted to take it away from Jesse. With the help of Mr. Augusten, my neighbor who held a shot gun to Eli Kie's head, we managed to escape that evil man with the bundle and our lives. Lieutenant Danielson had been waiting in Winna's house for us. I tripped that man up when he came flying out the front door after Jes with his gun drawn. Would he have shot my lover?! I beat him into unconsciousness. That's why I'm facing charges of assault on a police officer and flight from arrest. Danielson was murdered in his hospital bed. We know that Eli Kie has done this. He also killed Miss Thomas and set her home ablaze. Winna's house is ever under guard to prevent anything bad from happening to us. I'm falling into despair until Jes reminds me of the good things that's happened. We met. And like our former selves, we've fallen in love. Again. A Spirit is within us who will help bring a truth to the People that those who are like us can find happiness and love. We're helping a boy with that. Ah, Simon. How sweet your heart is and so willing to partake of love acts. We'll also be filling your head with good teachings. A parade of other good things that's happened run through our heads. I'm in a relationship with his uncle. Not a deep love that Jes and I share but as gay brothers. Running Water is a good man. I'm reminded of another uncle that I've helped. My manly strength has been Passed to Hawk Flying Over. He'll be able to give his next wife a baby. My heart feels lighter when we recall the other good deeds I've done for others. Winna won't be losing her home. I'll be paying off her mortgage after her husband had cashed out half its value. She also took my advice to ask her boss if she can work part time after being laid off. He agreed. I'll be teaching her MS-Word in the meanwhile. That way, she'll learn this necessary skill to return to full time work with the construction company. I peer into Jesse's eyes that shine like clear pools into his soul. I've Seen this man. He knows me too in a way no one else can. All my faults, weaknesses and fears. :You have a good heart too,: assures Jesse. :You're strong. Very brave. If not for you, I'd remain lost within myself and I couldn't help my People.: Pride fills me. Not so much for myself but for Jesse. He'll soon be trained by his grandfather to be the tribe's next shaman. I was going to undergo initiation to become a member of the Blackfoot. Instead, I'll remain true to my white heritage and do what I can for these Indian People as Mike. Short Hair is who I've become from Merging with Christopher and it's Jesse's namesake for me. "Where will we go for our honeymoon?" I'm startled out of my thoughts. Jes had asked that out loud. "Oh. I don't know." A laugh comes out of me. "We need to get married first." I clutch the small bundle hanging down from my neck. His grandfather had given it to me. Inside are two silver rings mounted with stones like dark tears. They had been Ron's and Running Water's marriage rings. "Grandfather said that he'll perform that rite for us," says Jesse. "Will your family attend?" I ask. I've never considered what the actual ceremony would entail. It's mostly symbolic; our exchange of vows in front of witnesses to make it official. We're already married in our hearts. "Then we've been enjoying our honeymoon already?" teases Jesse. "Ah, yes. Lots of love making." My daydreaming returns of getting us somewhere alone so we can get to know each other from outside ourselves. There's been too many distractions. So many problems we've had to face! "How about Las Vegas?" "Huh?" "I've heard that a lot of folks go there for their honeymoon. Some couples even get married there." I'm shaking my head. "That wouldn't be my choice." I know that it's not his either. He's just teasing me some more. My head fills with a more rustic setting for our honeymoon. We're riding on a horse along the Canadian border, no one around for miles and miles. All of our cares are left behind. I long to have Jesse all to myself, our only concern being for where to sleep for the night around a campfire. The days will be warm and sunny. "You can wear overalls," suggests Jesse. "No shirt. That's all Chris wore when he met his brave." "Then breechclout flaps for you." I'm laughing after saying that. Jesse looks down at himself with a shy grin. "It'll be like that time we first met. Our former selves that is." I can tell that Jes is serious. "Okay, if you want." There wouldn't be anyone around to see us in the wilds. We both possess skills to live off the land as it had been in Indian days of old. Jesse snuggles against me. We indulge in a daydream of our honeymoon as we imagine it will be. A horse carries us across the rolling prairies. I'll go shirtless in a pair of overalls while my lover wears mere buckskin flaps. We'll explore the lands of our grandfather's father's as they've remained. Unstained by civilization's encroachment, we'll finally be alone. Together. Ahh. I long for our return to a simpler life Chris enjoyed with Owopspec even if it's only for a week. We need this break from all our troubles. The doorbell rings. Both of us are startled back to reality. I'm groaning inwards. A glance at the clock reveals that my parents are early. Wearily, I get up from the couch and gesture for Jes to remain sitting there. On second thought, it'll be better if he were to hide out in the kitchen with his mom. I want to face my parents alone. Has dad told my mom about us? My steps down the hall are heavily placed over the floor. I take a deep breath. Open the door. To my pleasant surprise, Running Water greets me with grandfather standing beside him. "Come in!" I shout with relief. He-who-runs-up-mountains offers me his greeting and walks past, going into the front room as if in haste. I face Running Water with a bright grin. "I'll be waiting outside." We exchange glances. "How's your leg?" I mutter for not having anything better to say. "It's better." I'm looking past him into the growing darkness. A street light shines down on his red pickup parked at the curb. There's no one in sight. My arms open in their offer for a hug. My brother accepts it, briefly, then he steps back. I see longing on his dark face. His smile. That puts me at ease. No words come to either of us. There's nothing that needs to be said between us. Our faces reveal all. "I hope that it goes well with dinner tonight." A deep sigh comes out of me. "Thanks." My brother likely knows what I'll be facing with my parents. He's read the dread on my face. To put me at ease, Running Water grips my shoulder. I grasp his right arm and rub my forehead against the softness of his long shirt sleeve. "Be strong, for Jes-ee-ah." "I will." Running Water steps behind me with his long arms coming around my chest. I'm in need of his comforting hug. He knows this. His emotions are Felt in my head from our own Connection: concern, his understanding for my plight and a bit of humor that puts me off. "You'll be facing an 'invite' for dinner by Winna one of these nights." The man stiffens behind me. I regret having said that even as a tease. "She doesn't know about us." "No. But you know what I mean." Winna is still angry at him for knowing about Jes and I being together and not telling her. "Keeping our relationship a secret has some benefits. At least you won't have to face my parents." "Do they know about you and Jesse yet?" "My father does. I don't know if he's told my mother." When Running Water relaxes his hands around me, I'm holding them against my chest to prolong our hug. This man feels good behind me. I hump my butt against his groin and recall how much I enjoyed him fucking me this afternoon. "Are you still hurting down there?" asks Running Water. A grin springs to my lips. "A little. But it's a good aching." "I can't believe how much I want you, Mike." Running Water's words were spoken under his breath as if he hadn't meant for me to hear them. "I love you, my brother." He doesn't say anything but I know that he does. I've pledged myself to Jesse but my heart is big enough to have him in it too. After giving a kiss to my head, Running Water pulls away. I turn to him. He's already walking towards the street so I can't see his face. The emotions this man is feeling fades from my inner Sight but not before I catch regret in him. That leaves me gasping. Does my brother regret still being with me when I have Jesse or that he didn't win my full heart for himself? Maybe it's from something else. Am I being selfish to take his love when he could find another man to give it to? :I sense your turmoil, love. Please forgive me for peeking in your head.: I'm spinning over my feet to face the house. :Do you know why your uncle regrets loving me?: :He doesn't,: Answers Jesse. :My uncle regrets having to hide what you feel for each other from everyone.: I bow my head in shame. :Stop sulking out there and get your butt back in here!: scolds Jesse. :Grandfather is waiting to tell us something important.: I'm running back into the house, turning to close the front door with a bang (sorry, Winna!) and enter the front room. Grandfather is sitting on the couch beside Jesse. He lifts his right hand and gestures for me to set myself down on the coffee table. I do so. The old man casts his gaze towards the ceiling as if going into deep thought. His eyes aren't blinking. I've seen this in Elders before. Chris has, that is. Grandfather is considering how he'll shape the words to his big news. We must remain patient. Jes is staring at my knees. I pat the one on my left to catch his eyes. He gives me a plain face. We're not Passing thoughts, honoring the silence our shaman has imposed. Is it bad news he brings? A grin fills the old man's face. He lowers his eyes to mine and speaks. "It will be good to meet your parents, Short Hair." I'm gently nodding in reply. "I know they are soon to arrive so let me say what has brought me." Grandfather turns to Jesse. The news concerns him. "A shaman of the Omaha will come to Great Falls this Tuesday to meet with you. He offers his help." When Jes doesn't say anything after a moment, I blurt out, "Will he do something to prevent Good-eyes from coming up in Jes-ee-ah?" "The shaman only said that he comes in answer to your summons." My summons? "Didn't you call him?" Grandfather shakes his head back and forth. "Did you not tell him what's happening to my love... to Jes-ee-ah?" "No. Charms A Bird left a message on my answering machine." "What did he say?" asks Jesse. I see the intensity in my lover's eyes for his grandfather. Great hope. "These are his words: 'I am Charms A Bird of the Omaha. I am come to Great Falls this Tuesday in answer to the summons of that man with short hair. Look for me in a motel set in the forking of the Missouri and Sun Rivers. I await your arrival with an open heart. Be at peace.'" "He didn't leave a telephone number where he can be reached?" Grandfather shakes his head. I notice a peculiar gleam in his eyes. "That's all he said?" "Yes. Running Water listened to the tape and translated his words for me." "They were in English?" We've been speaking in Siksika because that's easier for grandfather. "Yes. Charms A Bird speaks in that tongue better than I." Again, I catch something in this old man's eyes as if he's not sharing everything with us. He wouldn't hold something important back. I trust him in this. Jesse reveals hope in his eyes that I Share in. :Charms A Bird Heard my plea! He's coming to help you deal with your former self.: :I think so, love.: Jesse looks past me with a startled look on his face. I'm turning my head 'round. My mother steps back into the hall. I've caught the look of surprise on her face that has me realizing she's been listening to us. Ah, no. She couldn't know what we've been saying in Siksika. When my father enters the room, I spring to my feet to greet them. There's nothing bad showing on his face. Relief fills me. Maybe he didn't tell mom that I'm gay after all. "A man let us in when no one answered the door," explains Michael. "That was Running Water. Sorry about that." I didn't hear the doorbell. My parents' approach to the couch prompts grandfather to get to his feet. I hear the bones cracking in his legs. Jes stands at his side to offer support if he needs it. I'm remembering my manners by making introductions. "This is He-who-runs-up-mountains, shaman of the Blackfoot and grandfather to Jes-ee-ah." I swing my hand towards my parents. "My father, Michael Yager and my mother, Linda." "Hello," says Michael. Grandfather nods his head. "You raise a fine son. He to come the People with good, give of his heart. You to proud him." I'm trying to hide my smile for the old man's broken English. My father nods his head but he doesn't look at me. Mother is beaming. Winna comes into the front room to offer them her greeting. "Good evening. You are well come to my house. I'll have dinner ready in about ten minutes." "Don't rush," says Linda. "We had come a little early." I glance at the clock. The minute hand points straight up so I'm not sure why she's said that. Winna returns to her kitchen without another word. Jes offers his place on the couch to my parents but they remains standing. So does grandfather. It becomes an awkward moment until my father asks about a painting on a wall. It's of 'Dust for the Dancers'. Jesse explains that it was painted by his grandfather's wife who eagerly offers comments about it. My mother steps to my side like a ghost. There's tension on her face. "Where's the bathroom?" I'm about to point back at the hallway but lead her there myself. She turns towards the front door instead. Oh. She wants to talk with me. Alone. Linda struggles for breath when she speaks. "Your father has told me that you're going to stay in Montana. Is this true?" I'm about to bow my head but remember Running Water's words to be strong. "Yes. It's true." Mom reaches for my hands and tightly grasps them. "You want to stay here with... these people?" Mom was going to name my lover but decided not to at the last moment. My father has likely told her everything then. My stomach pains me when our eyes meet. It's dark in the hall but I sense the pain and bewilderment in her. In a soft voice, "Please understand. I love him." My teeth are clenched after admitting that to her. "I heard you speaking earlier to that old man. How do you know Siksika?" I'm startled by mom's abrupt change in subject. More so, how does she know that's what the Blackfoot tongue is called? "You are able to speak Siksika better than he can speak English." The tiny hairs lift at the back of my neck after she said that. Not with English words but a mix of older Siksika with the modern form. My thoughts race as to how this can be. "My mother was half blooded," Linda explains in a whisper. I remember seeing an old photograph of Betsy With-a-big-voice. She was the daughter of Christopher's wife, Shirt-for-man. That must be how my mother learned to speak Siksika. I've never heard her speak it before. "You mustn't stay here!" Linda pleads. Anger bursts out of me. "I've grown up mom so please respect my decision!" My voice softens. "For the first time in my life, I'm happy. Jes-ee-ah loves me. He needs me. His mother has welcomed me to stay here with her son." Linda violently shakes her head. "You'll lose yourself!" "What?" I gasp. A sharp tingling runs down my spine when I Glean what she meant. How can she know?! My mother looks past me at someone standing just within the hall. It's Jesse. He meekly comes to stand at my side. "I... didn't mean to intrude." We exchange glances. :My mother knows! Not only that we're together but she fears that I'll lose myself if I stay here. She means to Christopher. How can she know about that?: My lover reveals his concern when he Sensed my fear. I've been blocking myself to him when speaking with my mother. Jes came to see what was the matter. I open myself to him now. Everything that's been said that's left me feeling bewildered. :Why don't you ask her?: suggests Jesse. I turn to my mother. She's wiping her eyes with the back of her hand. My hands are still held in her right hand as if never letting me go. She must. "Mom? I'm gonna be staying here with Jesse. Please don't be sad." "I'm afraid for you," says Linda. "From what?" She stares at Jesse for a long moment then shakes her head. My lover isn't the cause of her fear. She doesn't even seem to be that upset to know that I'm gay. Maybe she already did as mothers know their sons better than they know themselves sometimes. "Your grandmother. She told me when you were born. Warned me. Him..." I rush to hug my mother. She's trembling in my arms so I'm tightening them and shoo her from being afraid. After a long moment, we separate. Mom looks towards the front door. "It's rather warm in here," she comments in a weak voice. I turn to Jesse. "Let my dad know that we're going outside for a while. Mom needs some fresh air." I Send him these words. :I'm gonna have to tell her it's already happened and that there's nothing to fear.: :Don't say too much, love. Your mom is really upset.: :Yeah. I know.: Jes returns to the front room. The door is opened and we step out into the cool night. Mom steps down from the porch, pauses, then sits over its steps. I join her. "I have nothing against that boy," whispers Linda. "Mom. Jesse is nearly twenty four." "I'm sorry. Please don't mind me. You must think I'm acting silly." "No, mom. I know that you're worried about me staying her but I'm gonna be alright. Really." I'm given a funny look from her. "You... don't sound like yourself." My throat constricts. "I'm alright." I nod to her unspoken question and clasp her hand. "You have nothing to fear. What grandmother told you was a kind of Sight like a shaman is given from our Father. Interpreting what it means is another thing. I know what she meant about me but it's nothin' bad." I'm taking a deep breath. "It's already happened." "Tell me!" Linda wails. I tighten my grip of my mother's hand. "You can't tell anyone. Not even to your husband because he's not of the blood." Linda shakes her head but not in denial of what her son has asked of her. "I've not told anyone what my mother said to me... until now. That's why I kept your true heritage hidden from you by saying that your Indian blood had come from your great grandfather. Why I never spoke Siksika. To keep you from going to them where you'd lose yourself!" "I didn't, mother. I've found my true self. It is not something to fear." "What do you mean?" This is going to be difficult to explain. I put it off for a moment by asking, "Do you swear not to reveal what I'm about to say to anyone?" My mother nods her head. In Siksika, "I need to hear your spoken vow." "Very well. I swear that I'll not reveal to another what you will say." I'm nodding in acceptance of her oath. I find it strange that we're speaking in the old tongue. I'm seeing my mother as I've never seen her before. A woman of the Blackfoot. She's lived her adult life as a white but she shares a quarter of their blood. That's been kept hidden from her husband and from me. I wet my lips. "I've Merged with my former self." "What do you mean. Who?" I revert back into Siksika. "I am the son of my mother. You are the daughter of your mother who was the daughter of her mother, Shirt-for-man. She was my wife." Understanding flashes in her eyes for a moment. "Are you saying that you're reincarnated from my... grandfather?" "Yes. His name was Christopher Walker who was born in 1843. His mother was named Lythia. His father was Joshua Walker." "Is that what the old man told you?" "Jesse's grandfather? No." I see the disbelief in my mother's eyes. "I've Merged with my former self. All of his memories. I can tell you things that happened to Chris no one living today could know. For instance. He was born in a farm house outside Shelbyville near Big Blue River. At seven, he attended Blue Bells School. His teacher was an old lady named Mrs. Stevens but Miss Perkins took her place when he was eleven. She came from a well to do family and took up teaching from the goodness of her heart. I remember the photographs she showed us in class that her father took of folks. Of special interest was them depicting Indians. My love for those wild savages was born in me then. "At fifteen, Pa could no longer resist his wander lust to travel west. He heard tell there be virgin farmland for the takin' over the Mississippi so we packed up and left Indiana." My head bows when I recall the tragedy that befell my parents. I continue speaking after gulping in a breath. "When crossing a rain swollen river, Ma was swept off our raft. Pa followed her. I washed up on a sandbar where a trapper named Telson found me. We found Ma and buried her on the bank. He took me to Fort Union where a Blackfoot brave named Pah-kaps-owopspec or Bad-eyes in our tongue, stole me back to his tribe to live with him." My eyes flare. I decide not to reveal that he's Jesse's former self. My mouth shuts. No need to tell mom that we were lovers back then too. I catch my breath after saying my spiel. That's when I notice how my mother's hand is trembling. Her eyes are wide as saucers. I swallow past the hard lump in my throat and ask, "Are you alright?" "Yes." Mom is shaking her head back and forth though. It's difficult seeing her wild eyes. I drop my eyes to the sidewalk where there's a lightning bug crawling along it. His bottom glows faintly. Mother squeezes my hand and I hear her sigh. "Your voice. That's him I've been hearing so it's true. You have lost yourself to that man." "Chris died when he was only eighteen. He hasn't taken over who I am, only added who he was to me now. I'm still your son. Please, believe me!" My mom peers into my eyes for a long moment. "I don't know. This is a bit overwhelming for me! You're saying that you were someone else and if so, how can you be him while remaining my son?" "I have changed. You've heard that in my voice. Yet I remain the son you bore and raised until the man I've become. All of us are changed from the experiences we gain in life. Christopher's experiences are a part of me now. I was him in the past. We share many similar traits and I think that comes from me being his great grandson." I dare to reveal a little more to my mom. "He was murdered. That's why his spirit was reborn in me so he'd get another chance at life. I was him and he's become who I am now. We've Merged." Mom covers her face with her right hand. This has been too much for her. Jes had warned me. I Reach out to my lover and Ask him to bring out some tissues for mom. Him coming outside will also break this difficult moment. Everyone is waiting for us to come to dinner. I'm hoping that will help settle my mother after telling her all this. Within half a minute, I hear the approach of footsteps. Jesse squats at my side and hands me several tissues. "Thanks." I'm offering these to my mom. She dabs her face while averting her eyes from my lover. "Are you alright, Mrs. Yager?" Linda turns to Jesse but sets her eyes only on his legs. "No. I'm not. Please give your mother my apologies for not coming to the table. Mike? Could you ask my husband to come outside?" "Sure, mom." I get to my feet and walk back into the house with dread. Dad is found in the front room standing near the window. Grandfather is sitting on the couch. From both their grim faces, I know that they realize what's been happening outside. "Dad? Mom isn't feeling well so I think she wants you to take her back to the motel." He nods slightly. When our eyes meet, I see sadness mixed with suppressed anger. His hands form tight fists. My father strides past me while I take his place by the window. I can see mom sitting on the porch with Jesse. They're talking. I'm distracted by grandfather when he grunts. Not from pain, I think he's expressing his dissatisfaction for the way things turned out. I peer through the window. My father is leading mom towards the driveway where their car is parked. Jes remains sitting on the porch. Watching them. I run out of the front room to join him outside. The engine is started. I'm blinded by the car's headlights as it backs out of the driveway, turns, and speeds off down the street. I drop like a stone at Jesse's side. He touches my arm. "I am sorry." I turn to my lover gravely. "It's not your fault." My sight clears enough to see the tears in Jesse's eyes. Mom must have said something bad to him! "She's afraid," Jesse whispers. "For you." "What did she say to you?" Anger rises in me to see my lover's distress. Jes shakes his head, rubbing an arm across his eyes to dry them. "Tell me." He remains silent. I'm Peering into his head to know what he's unable or unwilling to tell me. I meet resistance but break through it. 'I want my son returned to me. Please! Leave him be.' Jesse snaps his head back as if I struck him. The force of Pulling what my mother had said from him had hurt him. I'm rushing to embrace my lover. :Sorry! Please forgive me for doing that!: He whimpers in response. I Sense a Presence rising between us. A face known to me. It's Owopspec. He offers Jesse protection and a release to his pain. I'm gasping in fear. Words spring from my mouth in an angry shout. "I will hate you! Despise what you'll become if you take him over. Go back Down!" Two pairs of ghostly hands try separating Owopspec from Jes-ee-ah but to no avail. A flood of memories slip past our fingers. I See an Indian boy's face, his toothy smile like a wolf's as he springs upon the rabbit. Chris and I try to stop their Merging. Yet it's happening. A third pair of hands enter the fray. They Reach lower than ours can into Jes-ee-ah and in his right hand is a shining spear. It strikes Owopspec. A blinding flash fills my eyes, my heart and my head. I'm reeling back until inner Sight is lost to me. With regular eyes, I see grandfather kneeling before us. He slowly opens his eyes. A grunt escapes his lips. "Grandson? Awaken." I turn to Jesse in desperate hope. His eyes remain closed. He clings to me like a frightened dog whose master has just saved him from great peril. "Jesse? Come back to us!" I Send those thoughts to him as well. After a moment, I Sense our Connection returning. My lover opens his eyes but they are unseeing. I'm pressing my forehead to his. :Please, my love. Wake up.: :Mike?: My breath rushes out of me as a gasp of joy. :I'm here! Oh, love. My dear Jesse! Please stay with me and not give in to Him.: I kiss my lover. His lips are slow to respond until he remembers who I am and who he is to me. :He tried to... He almost took me over!: :I know, my love. Grandfather is with us. He helped save you from Him.: Our kiss ends. We both turn to the old man who has risen to his feet. "Take my grandson inside to bed. He will feel the need for sleep in a moment so let him." I give grandfather a worried glance. "He has been cast back Down. That spirit within you came into my hand as a spear. I but wielded it." "Can you not smote him dead?" The old man shakes his head. "No. Shaman Good-eyes is already dead, in body. His spirit lives ever on in my grandson. Beyond my skill to..." The old man shrugs his shoulders. "Let us hope that Charms A Lot's aid will come in time." Jesse yawns in my arms. I'm Sensing his weariness and need for sleep. I lift him to his feet. He clings to me, whimpering. :I won't leave you. Ever!: We enter the house side by side and face Winna standing in the hall. "What's happened to my son?" she demands. I hear grandfather's voice answering behind us. I'm concentrating on keeping our feet and Sending soothing thoughts to my lover. The woman steps aside to let us pass. We're walking down the hall, into the kitchen filled with the smells of food that reminds me, sadly, of a ruined dinner with my parents. I cast that thought from my head. We reach our bedroom. I fumble with the doorknob, nearly dropping my lover but we manage to get inside the room. We reach our bed. I turn to lower Jesse onto it. In the dim light, I see Jesse unbuttoning his shirt. He yawns. I'm resisting the urge to fall into blissful sleepiness that's claiming him. I help him remove his shirt. It's cast to the floor along with mine. "Mike?" I squat down to be face level with Jes. He wets his lips but no words are forthcoming. It's from our Connection that I know what troubles my lover. :Don't you fret about my parents. That was wrong of my mom to... say that. You know that I'll never leave you! I can't.: As I'm able to know what troubles my lover, he too knows what worries me. I offer him my assurances. :Chris lost his parents to the river. If I've lost mine now too, well. I'll just have to live with that. Jes! I couldn't bear to lose you. We couldn't!: That duality of my former self and me becomes apparent for a moment. :I Felt the beginning of our Merging!: Sends Jesse. My lover's curiosity for his former self has been stirred. I remember how Christopher came up in me when I was in a terrible dark place. How alone I felt in jail! He offered to help me in my moment of weakness when I was most vulnerable. I Lived his memories. We Merged. :You are here for me, love. I don't need... Him.: I'm hugging Jesse hard. :For always!: I assure my lover. Another yawn escapes his lips. His head feels so heavy with sleep so I'm pulling him across our bed to a pillow. He's laying on his right side, me behind him. My arms reach around with my hands locking over his chest. I feel his hands grasping mine not ever letting go. There's the sound of a door closing. Approaching footsteps. Winna? I'm lifting my head to take a look. It's dark in the room but I Sense that it's grandfather who comes to sit on our bed. "Is my grandson asleep?" My eyes close in concentration. Jesse acknowledges the presence of his grandfather but he's too weary to respond. "Nearly," I answer. A yawn comes from my lips. I'm being drawn into sleep by my lover. "I will watch over you," assures the old man. "Rest now." When I draw a deep breath, the scent of burning sage fills my nose. It's a pleasant odor. A drum beat begins. I hear grandfather chanting softly that puts us both at ease. Sleep comes for us. A lean youth with long sandy hair stands before a tipi. Dried mud covers his body to protect it from the burning sun. The muscles tighten in his pale butt. Tied around his waist is a thong that holds a front flap. He wants to go inside. Something prevents him though. "Enter, Krist-o-fer." The youth bows his head. "I cannot." "Our tipi has ever been your home," says the voice from within. "With me." "That was so." The tipi's door flap is lifted by an unseen hand to reveal the darkness within. Chris lifts his right foot for a moment but he sets it back down. "I will remain outside and you must stay where you are, my love." "I need to be with you!" says the desperate voice from within the tipi. "Amongst the living." Chris bows his head even lower. In a sad whisper, "You cannot." "Have you not achieved a second chance at life?" "Yes. That is so." "We can be together as we were!" the voice from within pleads. The white youth shakes his head. "The cost is too great. Your coming would take over a life not belonging to you, my love. I've been afforded a new life because mine was wrongfully taken from me. You've lived yours! It was by your own hand that your spirit was severed from flesh." "In sacrifice to the People!" Tears fall down Christopher's freckled cheeks. "I know. Your Power Bundle was borne with a spirit and it has Passed into them." The white youth turns to face us. I'm holding Jes-ee-ah in my arms and Chris gently steps into my body. We're of the same spirit, nearly the same age and we share many traits. Only our life's experiences differ. They Merge to complete who we are. Ourselves. Me. "Bring him inside the tipi so that I may live again," begs Good-eyes. I shake my head back and forth. "Love!" the voice wails. His next words crack from emotion and great age. "How I long to walk in the sunlight with you. We can be together again!" Christopher weeps. "It cannot be, Owopspec. I have found love again with this man who was you and is yet not. Do not try to come forth in him, I beg." The tipi quakes from great anger. "You foolish boy! It is not only that I want to be with you as we once were. There is great need for me to return so that I may prevent a servant of the Darkness from bringing an end to..." I'm startled awake. My heartbeat sounds loud in my ears or is that from grandfather's drumming? I breathe in the smell of burning sage. That soothes me. I'm falling back to sleep. My eyes open in the early light of morning. Jes is snoring in my arms. There's the faint whiff of sage in the air that reminds me of grandfather. I slowly turn my head around to look for him. He's gone. Jesse yawns. His slim shoulders lift when he takes a deep breath. I kiss a bare spot on his neck that's not covered by his long hair. My mouth roams upwards, across a silky black river to an oval island of brown. I'm nibbling on my lover's earlobe. He giggles softly. "You're tickling me!" Hearing Jesse's voice puts my heart at ease. "Did you sleep well?" My thoughts frame a more important question. :Are you feeling... yourself?: :Yes, love. He did not Merge with me.: I'm Peering deep into Jesse's head to ensure that this is so. He seems to be the same. The pattern to his thoughts are familiar and I don't detect any that are strange to me. I breathe in a sigh of relief. :Love?: I Sense something from Jesse. It's awe. :What is it?: :A part of who my former self was as a boy was revealed to me.: Worry squeezes my heart. :Show me.: Our thoughts intertwine and I'm led to a corner of Jesse's mind that I don't recognize. There are memories held there that aren't his! :I didn't Live them,: assures Jesse. :He revealed something that happened to him when he was ten years old. I know they are Owopspec's memories and not my own. Let me Show you.: :Maybe we shouldn't Look,: I warn. :You may be tempted to know more about your former self and thus be ensnared.: Jesse releases a sigh. :No. That door in me is being guarded. I think we can Look at what Owopspec has left behind in my head. You'll be with me.: I'm remembering how I failed him last night. Owopspec's flow of memories was like water slipping through my fingers. I couldn't hold them back. :Grandfather has set that spirit within us to guard over my former self's coming,: assures Jesse. :I only have a few of Owopspec's memories. I'm drawn to Look at them like a moth is drawn to the flame.: :To its ill!: I warn. :That may be so, love but I can't ignore them! If we Look together, I'll be kept from the danger as if in your arms. Please. Let's Look.: I tighten my arms around Jesse. My head is shaking back and forth 'cause I'm thinking it's not wise for us to do so. My lover Says that he must. I fear for him! But if we don't do it now, he'll Look at the memories Owopspec left behind in his head when I'm not there to hold him. :Are you ready, love?: I'm nodding. A face comes before our inner Sight. He looks similar to Jesse except for the nose. It's bigger. The shyness in this youth's eyes is very familiar by how they're cast to the ground in front of strangers or when he's given a bad scolding by his father. Jes and I are swept into this strong memory of Owopspec's when he was a boy. Brown Reed is enduring words for having run away from the tribe for six fingered nights. Wind-in-her-hair, his mother had been beside herself with grief that turned to dread when she thought him dead. A scout had found the boy's breechclout on the plains beside the moccasined prints of an enemy. The boy's unexpected return brought joy to his parents but his father was grim when they'd spoken alone to learn why he'd run away and what happened that left the boy naked after his encounter with a Cree warrior. Jes and I catch glimpses of what led up to Brown Reed running away. The boys of his tribe had been teasing him. They called him names. Little Arrow even said that he was the chief's 'daughter' because his face was so pretty. Brown Reed was ashamed by his short height and how small his pole was for his age. He didn't like playing the rough games of his friends. They called him a girl because of it. Not all the boys were mean to Brown Reed. Beaver liked wrestling with him. Whoever ended up on top won. That led to a wrestle between their stiff poles. An exciting game! As Beaver held Brown Reed's hands down to the ground, he bent his legs around his friend's humping behind to hold him back. It became a contest of which boy could endure the intense thrills from their erections the longest. Brown Reed changed that part of their game when he turned to face the ground. Beaver laid over his back, rubbing himself against his cheeks. He spread his legs to slip Beaver's dick into his butt. Closing his legs, it made a tight place for his friend to rub. That felt very exciting. The boys enjoyed playing this until Hawk's Claw caught them doing it and tattled. Ear-to-ground-to-hear-buffalo was furious with Brown Reed. As chief, this incident only added to the disappointments he had for his son. He gave the boy flaps to wear along with a warning not to play such naked games. Yet Brown Reed still dared. He let Paints-his-arm, a boy of thirteen wrestle with him after their swim which led to naughty touching, belly rubbing and giving Brown Reed wet cheeks when that boy rode his butt. Paints-his-arm boasted to the other boys that his 'willing squaw' had made a man out of him. That shamed Brown Reed. He also feared his father's wrath so he ran away. It was on the second morning that Brown Reed's wanderings were tracked down by a Cree warrior. He wore a single feather in his hair. The man seemed too young to have achieved such an honor but his warhorse, weapons and a fine painted shield proved otherwise. Brown Reed was no match for him. The boy's hands were tied and he was made to walk behind the warrior's horse on a rope leash. He feared what would happen to him when they reached the man's camp. There were dark accounts of how slaves were treated by their enemies. Worse, he might even be sacrificed in some death ritual to appease an evil spirit. That night, Brown Reed revealed through hand signing that he was a chief's son. He offered the warrior two horses that his father would give for his safe return. The man shook his head. Three horses were offered. Either the warrior didn't belief he was a chief's son worth such a trade or he had something else in mind. The boy learned what that was in the morning. They'd come to a stream where the warrior fancied to clean himself. He untied Brown Reed's hands much to the boy's surprise. When an opportunity came to flee, he tried but the man easily overcame him that led to wrestling. It was unmatched. Brown Reed landed some blows on the man who only laughed, his mean game turning rough when he held the boy's hands down along his back and bit his butt. That lead to something even worse. The man licked into his hole then stuck his big cock in. It was painful. Yet the boy felt he deserved to be used like a squaw as Beaver and Paints-his-arm had done to him. Those boys only rubbed between his cheeks. This man spermed inside him! Afterwards, the warrior signed that he was being taken back to his tribe where he'd tend to the man's tipi and satisfy his nightly lust. Brown Reed's breechclout was left on the bank since it was a boy's garment. Brown Reed was often forced to satisfy that man during their journey. Each time, the boy struggled less and came to accept it. A dark realization grew in him. He liked getting his butt filled with seed. The Cree warrior noticed. After satisfying himself, he turned the boy around and sucked on his stiff pole for his pleasure. A change came to the man. He let Brown Reed ride with him on his horse and was gentler with sticking in his butt. His erection was taken in the man's hand for thrills when their bodies joined. After getting spermed, the boy's pole was sucked on until he couldn't endure the intense thrills any longer. Brown Reed saw something unexpected in the man's eyes. A look that reminded him of what he longed to see from his father when trying to please him or after performing a good deed. He realized that by giving his body willingly to this enemy warrior, he was given something in return that he'd never achieved from his own father: love. I interrupt what we're Seeing to Tell Jesse something. :I didn't know that Owopspec had suffered a difficult childhood. He never spoke of it to me, ah... I mean to Chris. As a man, Owopspec's father treated him with respect and loved him as any father does for his son.: :My own father was disappointed in me.: That makes me very sad. :Maybe when your father can accept that you're gay like your mother has, he would have been able to show his love for you like Owopspec's father did for him.: :That's the hope I cling to.: In a flash, I understand what has grieved Jesse the most when his father ran away. They didn't get the chance to grow up together, for father and son to truly become so and display the love both had for each other :Your father may still return to you and your mother. You've grown into a man who has been named the successor to your grandfather as shaman of your tribe. I know that would make your father proud.: :I'm willing to forgive him for leaving us. Maybe he'll forgive me.: :There's nothing to forgive, my love! You didn't do anything wrong! He has to accept you for who you are. I know that can be the hardest thing for a father to grant his son. Look at Owopspec. His father came to accept how his spirit directed him when he reached manhood. The warriors even followed Owopspec when his father fell in battle. He was given the name Good-eyes, Chief of the Blackfoot. And later, he became shaman.: I go deep into thought when considering the strained relationship with my own father. He wanted me to graduate from college like he did. Instead, I pursued a career in computers that earned me a lot of money but that didn't impress him. Now he's learned that I'm gay. Man! How am I ever gonna gain acceptance from my father now? :Mike? There's always hope if you allow it to live on in your heart.: :Yeah. Hope for both of our fathers.: Jesse brings my left hand clutching his shoulder down to his heart. I acknowledge his gesture with a squeeze. :I wonder how Brown Reed escaped that Cree warrior?: Asks Jesse. :Don't you know? Owopspec didn't finish the account of what happened to him as a boy?: :No. We didn't Merge. Grandfather stopped his flow of memories coming into my head.: Suspicion fills me. :Maybe Owopspec only allowed you a glimpse of his boyhood to entice your Merging so you'll learn how that story ended.: :Maybe.: Jesse reaches down to remove his jeans and underwear. He's feeling too warm under the covers to wear clothes. I notice what my lover is doing so I'm baring myself as well. My hard cock presses up against Jesse's butt. I lock my hands over his chest. A kiss is planted on his moist neck. Ahh. This man feels so good in my arms! We both realize what this is leading to. :Brown Reed discovered that his butt could offer pleasure to others and for himself. That helped set his path in life.: "Yeah..." I breathe. Jesse backs himself onto me until my cock slips between his cheeks. I've not prepared his hole for fucking though. :Beaver and Paints-his-arm enjoyed rubbing their dicks in Brown Reed's tight cheeks.: Jesse presses his legs together. I'm moaning from that lusty sensation. Jesse's cheeks have trapped my cock between them. I start rubbing between them for thrills as those boys had done in Brown Reed's tight butt. Jesse giggles. :Brown Reed didn't stop playing those naked games with the other boys.: :I'm sure of it. That boy was likely 'misplacing' his rear flap to draw the lusty attention of his friends much to his father's dismay. As a man, Owopspec kept his butt bared like any squaw-man wanting to be spermed. Chris witnessed many of the needing braves and warriors in camp fucking his lover. They had done him in their boyhood. Hmm. I think I know why that Cree warrior let Brown Reed go.: :He didn't escape him?: Asks Jesse. :Do you think a boy of ten could have overpowered that lusty man?: :No. You're probably right, love. That Cree warrior was given something more valuable in trade than three horses. He learned from Brown Reed that love could happen between a man and a boy.: :Then why did he not keep that youth for himself?: :Have you not stopped yourself from plucking a pretty flower so that it may remain alive on the stem and ever as a sweet memory?: I know what he means. My left hand lowers to grasp my lover's dick. It's very stiff. He reaches back for my butt, pulling over it hard to force my penetration of his asshole. Ahh! The sensation is intense. My cock slips all the way inside him with an ease that surprises me. :I've felt your oozing,: explains Jesse. :Like Brown Reed, my butt enjoys getting stuck. I want your love to fill me.: I'm keeping still for a moment so that my lover can get used to my cock. It doesn't ooze that much. I don't want Jes hurt when I ride his ass. :Yessss. If it hurts, love, it'll be a good pain!: I Sense his longing to get fucked good and hard. Running Water's cock had felt wonderful in my butt yesterday and hearing that man's groans was very thrilling. This gay act of giving our bodies to the lusty need of others is most fulfilling. My hands roam up Jesse's slim body to his chest. I swirl fingers across his tits that cause them to come erect. He moans softly. :Can you imagine how a boy of ten could have endured a warrior's savage mounting?: Asks Jesse. :I'm sure it had hurt a lot at first.: :Yet Brown Reed grew to like feeling that man's cock in his butt. The boy felt proud that he was satisfying a warrior as if he were a girl. He really liked the ending part. Seed filled him but without the risk of making a baby in him.: :That's what's good about being a gay fuck,: I tease. Jesse sticks his butt out to fully impale himself on my cock. He wants me bad. My stabs begin. Ahh! An asshole is tighter than simply rubbing between a pair of cheeks like Brown Reed's friends had done with him. That warrior had shown him a better way to offer boys their release - inside his hole. Jes knows some tricks to tighten his when I'm pulling back. My forward thrust stabs into slimy heat that has me groaning out. :I Feel your pleasure, love!: Jesse's left hand is pulling over my butt to drive my cock faster through his butt. Our bodily joining completes how we're always Connected in thought. We're Sharing this joy! :In this moment we are truly One!: Sends Jesse. I'm giving my lover a deep kiss to his neck. The lime smell of his skin enflames me to even greater passion. My left hand pulls hard over his waist, getting my cock real deep in his asshole. Jes wails out in his high pitched voice. He feels very intense from me fucking him. :Ron never made me feel this good!: Sends Jesse. I know why. Only that man's cock touched Jes with its lustful power. Ron couldn't reach his heart as I am. Love can be expressed through sex but not the other way around. Having sex with someone doesn't mean it is love. :Your heart has learned this truth, love.: :I have a good teacher.: I'm bucking like a stallion to fulfill my lover's desire that matches my own. He pulls the covers down to our thighs. I look low at Jesse's little brown ass that my pale cock plunges into with a fierce beat. He wail out like a girl. I'm holding breaths to deepen my own thrills. :Jes! You are very much like Owopspec. I've Seen him as a boy through your eyes and from Chris, the man he became. You don't need to Merge with your former self. Resist him!: :I will, love. I promise!: My left hand feels a stiffening to Jesse's dick. At his moment of climax, I'm cupping his shooting knob to catch it all. My lover cries out. There's a tight clamping around my cock that gets me exploding. Ahh! We Share our sweet male thrills at this moment. Then our struggling bodies grow limp. We're left heated and sweaty from a love making that just seems to get better and better. It has taken my breath away. :I'm noticing that too,: comments Jesse. :You're becoming a great lover!: Breaths rush through our mouths yet that doesn't prevent us from Talking. :You too. I can't get enough of you!: Jes Sends me his heartfelt love and I give his neck a deep mouth kiss that will leave a mark. My filled left hand is brought up to Jesse's chest and opened over his heart. I spread his cum all over him. We both smell its sweet scent, reminding me of that pretty flower best left on the stem for others to enjoy. :Yes, love. We'll let others enjoy our pretty flowers.: Jesse rubs over my cheeks in a gesture of what he meant. Our brown and white petals have drawn men (and a boy) to enjoy us. I'm glad that I didn't pluck Jesse's love from the stem for only me to have. :I've given myself to Ron and you, love. Running Water, Simon and I have enjoyed the loveliness of your white flower. Others will too.: :Yeah, okay.: My breath comes out as a long sigh. I hear my heartbeat in my ears and so does Jesse. No. That's drum beating! :Keep holding me, Mike. It'll be alright.: We both realize that grandfather must still be in our room! He didn't leave us last night and may have seen our love making. I resist the urge to turn my head around to find out. I'm feeling a burning to my face. My left hand pulls the covers up to our shoulders so the old man won't see that we've been fucking. :Don't be embarrassed, love. Grandfather knows how it's done.: :Yeah. But I'll bet he's not seen two guys doing it.: I bury my face in Jesse's neck to hide myself. :Grandfather knows that Ron was with my uncle that way. He even married them. You keep the silver rings he crafted for them that will soon be ours to wear.: Ah, yes. We're to be married next month. I'm still curious to know if grandfather will perform our ceremony in front of family. :Why not ask him?: I release my tense breath against Jesse's neck. Courage comes to me. :Okay. I will.: Jes helps me turn him around to a sitting position in my lap. Our bodies remain connected as our thoughts ever are. I cast my eyes to the left with dread. Grandfather is sitting on the floor near the door. He's slowly beating on his drum, head bowed slightly and eyes closed. From his position, he could have seen us making love earlier. The drumming ends. Grandfather lowers his hands and looks up at us with utter peace showing on his face. I know the feeling. My face is still burning with embarrassment but I manage to smile at the old man. "How are my grandsons this morning?" Jesse returns the expected response. "We greet the rising of the sun with light hearts. And you, grandfather?" "My heart is at ease. This will be a good day." The old man sets his drum down by his side. I'm holding Jesse in my lap with my hands covering his dick from sight. The covers had fallen down to our knees when we had crossed our legs. Most of my body is hidden from the old man. I wonder if he's noticing my lover's wet chest? The smell of his cum still fills my nose. He-who-runs-up-mountains breaks out in a grin. "The morning has already proven to be a good one. Yes?" We're both nodding our heads. "Grandfather? I want to ask you something." The old man's face turns plain. He slowly lifts himself from the floor and comes to sit at the corner of our bed. "Yes, Short Hair?" "Well. I wanted to know, ah... We want to know if you will be performing our wedding ceremony in private or if there will be family present." The old man lowers his head for a moment in thought. He answers presently. "That is for both of you to decide." I turn to Jesse though I'm only able to see the left side of his head. "What did Ron and Running Water decide? When you married them, that is." "They stood together in my ceremonial chamber to exchange vows and the giving of rings. Only the three of us were there." I'm gently nodding. :Jes? What do you think about our wedding?: "I would want my mother to attend," answers Jesse out loud. "Running Water can too." I peer at grandfather and ask, "Would others want to be at our wedding?" "That is up to you both. Invite those who would honor your union who in turn would be honored to be there." "Yes, grandfather." My thoughts turn to Owopspec and Chris. Their request upon their shaman to be married had been denied yet everyone in the tribe knew that they were a couple. A thing acknowledged in the People's heads but sadly, it wasn't taken into their hearts. I'm realizing that's what a formal wedding ceremony can do for us. Jes and I are already married in our hearts but a public exchange of vows and the symbolic giving of rings can join their hearts to ours in celebration. :I agree, love. Our family and friends can help us celebrate our union. I'm not ashamed that you are a guy. We're two people who are in love.: Tears fill my eyes. I lift my hands to Jesse's chest and squeeze him in a tight hug. He strains to turn his head around for us to kiss. We manage it. A strong hand grasps my left shoulder. Grandfather grasps Jesse's shoulder and with his face lifted, he asks our Father for His blessing upon us. I think they are the same words he uttered at the Chinook Community Center in old Siksika when I couldn't understand them. I can now. "Great Spirit! I come before You with a glad heart to announce that these two young men are as one in love. Jes-ee-ah with Short Hair, and it is good! Their days together will be in the Light. Good medicine, two hearts I think." The old man lowers his face with bright eyes. "We are honored by your words, grandfather." We'd said that in unison. That draws a sharp glance from the old man but when we smile shyly, his expression softens. "I am happy for my grandsons! And very proud of you both. You walk in the Light of our Father with your hearts filled with joy." "We are tasked to share that with others," says Jesse. Grandfather nods in understanding. His face turns plain. "Are you ready to get up? Winna will be relieved to see that her son is well this morning." "Yes, grandfather." I Feel my lover's concern for his mom. She had seen him swooning in the hall and half carried to our bedroom in my arms. Grandfather must have told her something of what ailed Jes. She needs to know that he's feeling better. I release a tense sigh. The troubles in my life return to weigh heavily on my shoulders. Grandfather peers at me with a knowing look in his eyes. "You have been strong, Short Hair. Not only for Jes-ee-ah but thy self." I'm bowing my head. For how much longer can I endure? "When a hidden truth no longer serves for the good..." mutter grandfather. What does he mean by that? I catch a flash of insight in his eyes but I'm unable to Glean anything from him. It's like I'm too drained or something. "I will speak with Quiet-before-the-dawn. Darkness will flee before the Light of truth which we've kept hidden for too long. The many woes to your hearts will be cast out. This, I promise you grandsons." I'm shaking my head from not understanding what he means. Jesse doesn't either. The old man leaves our bed to fetch his hand drum, incense bowl and his pouch from the floor. Jesse lifts himself from my lap. My limp cock pulls wetly from his butt to sleep against my balls. I reach under the covers to find our clothes in a rush. Grandfather opens the door but before stepping out, he turns to us with the raising of his right hand. We return his gesture. With a soft thud, the door is closed behind the old man. Jes is standing on the right side of our bed. He lifts his arms in a gesture for me to get up and hug him. I do so. It's a wonderful meeting of naked warmth. We peer into each other's eyes with love shining in them. A kiss happens. That leads to another one and another... Before we know it, our hands our pulling low over each other with a thrilling mash of our cocks between us. :We're gonna get wet bellies.: :I think so, love.: Jesse's dick has stiffened against mine. We're clutching each other with our bodies swaying as if in a strong wind. Kisses. There's a soft knock at the door and then it's opened. My lover's eyes grow wide. "Oh! I am sorry." The bedroom door is closed. That was Winna's voice! Oh, boy. Now she's seen us together in a way that no mother should. :It's okay, love.: Jesse giggles. :She only saw your backside.: :And you holding it.: We're both laughing though that mostly comes from our embarrassment. :She shouldn't have entered our bedroom.: :I know. My mom is worried about me because of last night. She only wanted to see if I'm feeling better this morning.: :She's seen more than that,: I chide Jes. Our arms loosen from around each other since the spell has been broken. :Let's go take a shower.: We're both pissing in the toilet. Winna was nowhere to be seen when we passed through the kitchen. Maybe she's in the front room with grandfather. Jesse shakes his dick dry. I finish pissing and turn to sit down on the pot. Sounds come from my butt that gets Jes holding his nose teasingly. My face begins to burn. I wipe myself. :Your turn to smell up the room.: :I don't need to go right now,: Answers Jesse. He grasps his cheeks with a smug grin on his face. I look down at his little brown butt with awe. My love is deep inside it. Jes steps into the bathtub with me joining him. The shower curtain is pulled across. He turns both spigots and checks the water's temperature with his hand before starting our shower. We soap up. Rinse. I'm handed the shampoo bottle and apply some to both our heads. My hands lather up his long black hair. He's rinsing off while I tend to my own hair. Before I can voice my plea, Jes hands me a razor. I'm turning away from the shower, my wet butt pressing against his while shaving my face. His hand reaches back to grasp my left hand. It's wonderful how we're able to anticipate the other's needs and wants without having to utter them by mouth or even in thought. I set my razor down in the soap dish. Our slippery butts rub together with a sensual feeling. It is a nice part of our bodies. Jesse turns around to give me a hug from behind. He has a hard dick. I'm humping myself back there suggestively. :You wanna stick in me?: :Not right now, love. I'm simply enjoying you in my arms.: My hands lift to grasp his locked over my belly. I'm closing my eyes to enjoy this sweet moment with Jes. This guy is mine and I've given myself to him. We're a couple. Love bursts in our hearts. :Will you invite your parents to our wedding?: Asks Jesse. :Sure. If they don't mind seeing their son married to another guy...: Jes was serious about asking that. Sadness comes to me. Last night didn't turn out so well. A disaster actually. My father has more cause to be disappointed with me. I've really upset mom. I wish that we could get another chance to settle things between us but that's not likely gonna happen. They're returning to Indiana tonight. We step out of the shower. A big white towel is shared between us to dry off. I look at Jesse's long hair laying limp along his back and wonder if he'll ask his mom to braid it for him this morning. :I know that you like me wearing it loose.: I'm given Jesse's sly grin and with a nod, assure him that I didn't mind him peeking in my head. :I think you look better that way, my love.: :I know. But when it gets really hot, I'll ask mom to braid it. You guys with short hair don't know how much fuss it can be for us with long hair. The heat frizzes it up. My shoulders get all sweaty and strands catch into my mouth and eyes. Yuk!: I'm laughing. :You could get it cut short like mine.: "No way!" shouts Jesse. :Hawk Flying Over wears his hair short but I don't like how bare it makes his head look. Not proper.: :I agree with you. Not Indian.: Jes punches my shoulder. I answer that by tugging on his hair. He's about to grab mine, realizes there's not enough to pull on and reaches down to pull on my cock instead. :Hey. That's not fair!: Jesse giggles. :It was the only long thing I could find.: Humor fades from my lover's eyes to be replaced by deep longing. For me. I offer him an embrace. His chin rests over my left shoulder. Our ears come together in a kiss. We hold each other close, the thought of making love crosses our minds but we decide to just be. We dress into our jeans. Our shirts were left back in our room on the floor next to where grandfather had slept last night. Winna had supplied him with a blanket and pillow. I hope that his back isn't too stiff from lying over the carpet. :He's slept in worse places during his life,: comments Jesse. :I'm glad that he was watching over us during the night.: :And are you also glad that he might have seen me fucking you?: Jes shrugs his shoulders in reply. A serious expression comes to his face. :It's no big deal. You white folk get so hung up on being seen naked and doing it. Now if it were my mom...: :But she did see us 'doing it'. Remember?: :Not really. She only saw us hugging and that only briefly.: :Well. I hope she doesn't mention it like apologizing to us or something.: Again, Jes shrugs his shoulders. I'm grabbing our towel and we leave the bathroom. There are voices coming from the front room. Right as I'm realizing that could be my father's voice, we nearly run into my mother in the kitchen. Winna is heating up something on the stove beside her. "Mike!" exclaims Linda in a fluster. Surprise passes over my face to be followed by anger and then hope. I glance at Jesse. I've Felt him becoming very tense to see my mom again. "I am sorry about what I said to you last night, Jesse." My lover nods his head slightly. I'm turning to my mom with the hope that she'll have something to say to me. Our eyes meet. Her face becomes stern as if I've done something wrong. That makes me angry. "You really upset him, mom. More than you can know." I reach down for Jesse's hand and start pulling him towards our bedroom. He plants his feet over the floor. "I forgive you," says Jesse. "I'm sure this hasn't been easy for you." "It hasn't. I'm really sorry," mutters Linda. "Mike? Please don't be mad." I release a tense breath. "Okay. But could you please start treating me like a man instead of your little boy?" Winna glances at us for a moment. She turns her stove off and heads for the dinning room with a plate filled with fried bread. :Maybe I should leave you two alone,: Asks Jesse. :Give me the towel and I'll take it back to our bedroom.: I tighten my grip around his hand. :No. Please stay here with me. Okay?: Linda turns her head to look towards the dining room. "I think your mother is ready for us to sit down to eat." "I think so too." A shy expression comes to Jesse's face. "We need to get some shirts on so... Please excuse us for a moment." We're nearly running back to our bedroom. My head is in turmoil but I concentrate on buttoning up my shirt. Jes flashes me a sympathetic look. After we've taken a brush to our hair, we check each other out and pass inspection. I'm walking to the door when my lover stops me. "Forget about what happened last night," asks Jesse. "You're getting that second chance you wanted to make things right. Okay, love?" "Okay." We peer at each other for a moment. I realize that no matter what happens, whether my parents accept our relationship or go home disappointed, I'll still be with my lover. This is where I belong now. Jes clasps my hands. He wets his lips in want of a kiss so I give him one. "Ready now?" "Yes. I hope my parents will be good." Jesse clicks his teeth together. :We weren't the only ones upset by their sudden departure last night. Your mom had gone to all that trouble making dinner for them.: :Now, we'll have it for breakfast. Let's go eat, love.: ---------------------------------------------------------------------------- End of file: TEACHLV1.TXT The story continues in: TEACHLV2.TXT