Date: Thu, 6 Jul 2006 17:00:36 EDT From: Tommyhawk1@aol.com Subject: "A Failure to Communicate" A FAILURE TO COMMUNICATE By Tommyhawk1@AOL.COM WWW.TOMMYHAWKSFANTASYWORLD.COM WWW.TOMMYHAWKSROGUEMOON.COM I walked into Big Jacob's offices with my usual punctualism, of which I have more than a little. It does not do in the business in which Big Jacob is occupied to be tardy, as he has been known to show his displeasure with such misbehavioralists with a reminder carved into one of their body parts so they will not forget with much rapidity. As I happen to be extremely fond of every part of my body of which I am aware, I felt it behooved me to attend to Big Jacob's pleasure with all dispatchness. Big Jacob was sitting behind his desk, and let me tell you that Big Jacob has a lot to place in such a position, if he was to get on hands and knees, he would take up more room than the desk! But Big Jacob doesn't have to get down on his hands and knees to get things done, he has people like me to get on hands and knees, to form for him a footrest if he is so inclined. So I takes off my hat and I says all geniality-like, "Good afternoon, Big Jacob. Here I am as you requested, and I am ready for what it is you are wishing." As I said, I was genie-ality-like, but you probably thought I meant I was smiling or something. Big Jacob looks up at me and he says, "Well, Tall Tony, as much of a pleasure as it always is to see your smiling countenanceship, I have a grievance with one of our bookies that requires you to remind him of whom he is owing his allegiance as well as a full accounting of his receipts, of which he is sadly lacking in his mathematics, in that he can count his fifteen percent of the take on five thousand dollars, and pocket four thousand five hundred for himself." "That is indeed a most egregiousness breaching of his contractualship, Big Jacob." I says. "I would be most pleased to visit this person and visit upon said person whatever rearrangements you feel would be most likely to reformalize his performanceness in future." "I knew that I could place my dependance upon your enthusiasticity in this occasion." Big Jacob says. "I will tell you that the bad apple is none other than Kevin McCormick, who has recently taken over the business from his father who was also named Kevin McCormick, so when you visit their hardware store, you will take proper care that you will visit your retributionhood upon the one who is not white of hair and arthritic." "I shall take most proper care that the hair of the McCormick upon which I take your revenge shall have hair that is not vacant of any hue and tintship." I said sincerely. "But you still have not told me what exactly you wish me to visit upon anybody of any hair color." "That is true." Big Jacob leaned forward. "What I want you to do to Kevin McCormick is quite simple." Now I must explain to those of you who are not members of my occupationhood that when a man like Big Jacob gives his instructions, he cannot simply say, "I want to break So-and-So's arm" because if So-and-So's arm gets broken and the police get curious about his misfortunateness, it is very important that no hidden recording can come along and show that Big Jacob was the author of that particular parting of the bone's integrityship. So this requires upon the part of the member of Big Jacob's company an ability to translate his general instructions into a most specific arrangement of actions. In order to make the executation match up with the verbalization, you must pay the most specific attention to the exact words Big Jacob is using. So I am listening with an intensification that makes of me like a stenographer, only I am not sitting on Big Jacob's lap, not that Big Jacob has a lap of a size that any but the most miniscular of the ladies could accommodate themselves. "I want you to take Kevin McCormick down and I want you to work him over, really give it to him good, and you work him long and hard, and don't stop until you have made him scream and beg." Big Jacob sat back again, which for him, meant he was done instructioning. "Do you understand me, Tall Tony?" "I do most truly understand you, Big Jacob." I said. "And you may depend upon me to follow your instructions with the utmost of particularity." "You are a most loyal follower." Big Jacob said. "And now, go and make me proud to call you one of my own." So with my heart bursting with pride, I removed myself from Big Jacob's presence and set out to repair my absence from said Kevin McCormick. McCormick's Hardware Store was nothing special, which is how Big Jacob likes to have his fronts for his bookies operating. Inside was everything you would need if you felt a good use for your time was unplugging a stopped toilet or adding electrical outlets to your room. But the main purpose of the business of course, was to be a place where a man could go without anybody casting unkind aspersionations upon him and put a few bets down under the guise of picking up a new socket wrench. His wife would wonder why her husband needed more socket wrenches, but of her possible answers, far down on the list was that he was trying to make the weekly trifecta so he could leave her and find a woman who was ten years younger and five breast sizes large than her. Everyone has to have a dream. But Kevin McCormick's job was not to set the odds or to do anything but take the money and phone in the bets. And pay out as he had to in order to settle the bets with the winners. He was supposed to keep a percentage of the bet money and pay the rest of it (most of it) to Big Jacob who was, after all, taking all the risks involved. Big Jacob wasn't selfish, he knew that most bookies skimmed a little extra for himself, and as long as he didn't get too greedy, Big Jacob would overlook it. Kevin McCormick was taking a bet when I walked in, and I gave him the "it's okay" signal so he would go ahead and finish the bet. When he did, and the man left, I noticed that he didn't phone in the bet. A typical way of skimming was to not record the bet, then when the man lost (most people do), Big Jacob wouldn't know about the bet at all and he could keep the money. But Big Jacob sent guys around to all his bookies with odd bets so he can keep track of just this, and Kevin McCormick had come up smelling like the wrong end of a race horse. With the other guy out of the store, I closed the door and turned the lock and pulled down the shade. "You are closed for a half hour or so." I informs him. "I have the monicker of Tall Tony, and I have been sent by Big Jacob to teach you a lesson about how to calculate your percentages in a way that is more in line with verisimilitudeness." He blanched at that, as you can imagine. "Wha-, wha-, wha-what, what are you going to do to me?" he said as I advanced upon him. "My instructions from Big Jacob were crystaliciously clear." I said. "You will remember this, I can guarantee you." I went around behind his counter and said, "Now, if you will but comply with my instruction, you will survivalize this with only a memory or two to occupy the empty space which is supposedly the repositorium of your conscience, which I understand to be a vacuum most ponderous in quantity. We should start by your removing of your apron and shirt, as we do not want to get them messy." "Oh, God." Kevin said and he obediently shucked his heavy-cloth apron and the white shirt. This left him in an undershirt of the sort they call a "wife-beater" and I saw that he had some considerable muscle of his own, indeed, if he chose to resist me, he could probably do a respectable job of rearranging my countenance. Still, such a prospect is a hazard of doing business for such as me, and I said, "Now I shall carry out upon your person the instructions which were given to me by Big Jacob." "Go ahead. I don't blame you personally." Kevin said to me, squinching his eyes shut. I had to smile at that, for he was about to get the surprise of his life. I stepped up and I took him in my arms and I kissed him and his eyes popped open and he gave out a "glmph" of shock. I kissed him in a way that made it clear he had best to join me in this or he was going to be in for a rougher treatment. So he began to kiss me back, a kiss that was more bewildered than passionate. I commenced to moving my hands over his body, and when I moved down to kiss his neck, he said, "Uh, Tall Tony?" "Yeah?" I said in the midst of my kissing of his Adam's apple. "Uh! Why are you doing this?" I grabbed his buttocks in both hands and I pulled him tight against me. "Because I am a loyal henchman to him who is the boss of both of us, namely Big Jacob and he has given me instructions on how to deal with you. I am to take you down and work you over and that is what I am commencing to do here, so if you will but kindly cooperate, I can move on to the taking you down so I can work you over." And I ground my crotch up against his, let him feel my big, thick Italian tool and after a moment, I was rubbing it against a tube fully as firm as my own inside his pants. "I can see that you are a practical man." I said as I stopped rubbing him and reached down for his fly. "It is good in my business to deal with a practical man." I got his pants open and reached inside, he was wearing boxers and I found the opening of them and got a handful of male tumescencehood. I gripped it tightly and felt it swelling in my hand. "A practical man with a willingness to do what he has to can go very far in the organization." I knelt down, pulled out his cock, nine solid inches of pure Irish prick, and regarded the apple-shaped head with interest. "Now it is time for me to do the taking you down part." I wet my lips with my tongue and then I wrapped them solidly around that apple of Ireland and was rewarded with an appropriately Irish moan. "Ooohhh! I can't believe that Big Jacob told you to do this to me." He gasped. I had the glans thoroughly wet now and I began to stuff the shaft itself further down my throat. The huge knob was fitting nicely into the space behind my tongue and I was enjoying the percolationisms of his throbbing pud on my taste bud receptacilities. So big, so hot, so smooth and sliding like velvet cake at the best restaurants which I had patronated upon several occasions in my capacitizing as a bodyguard for Big Jacob. It had the same feel upon my tongue and palate, silken and clean and slick as butter. "Ohhh, Big Jacob couldn't have meant this!" Kevin moaned. "You must have gotten him wrong, and...." I jerked my head off of his cock and was up on my feet and glaring right into his frightened face. "Now, you listen to me and you listen good!" I snarled at him. "Big Jacob trusts me, he trusts me to understand what he needs when he needs it. I never misunderstand him, and he trusts me to fulfill his every order to the letter. He told me to take you down and work you over, and that is precisely what my intentions are." And I went back down, but this time I took him with me. "Now shut up while I suck your dick or I'll give you a fat lip that's going to make it very hard for you to suck mine for me. The next step for you is for me to really work you over, and I intend to do so to the best of my ability! So you get to working on my dong and you'll reap the beneficiaries of that when I stuff it up your ass." That was enough to get this Kevin guy into line, he and I were on the floor and I found that this red-haired Irishman had a real talent for nursing my pud into a glorification of the sensualities. I was relishing this until I realized that maybe the guy was trying so hard to suck me off so that when it came time to stuff him up his anal repositorium, I would find myself lacking in the quintessential elementaries to do so, namely, to have a stiff dick. So, as marvelously as the little twinkling lights of sexual glowbugs were sparkling in my cranial spaces, I pulled my mouth from his cock and my cock from his mouth and I said, "All right, now it is time for your working over, so if you will but remove your lower clothing from your extremities and bend over so that I may commence my insertion, we shall make this working-over as thorough as is humanly potentiable." "Oh, man!" Kevin groaned, panting as he struggled to remove his shoes and his pants as ordered. "Nobody is ever going to believe me when I tell them about this! They'll all think I am fucking making this up!" "I shall give you such evidentiaries as you may be able to retain." I informed him. "However, you know that Big Jacob is not very keen upon such publicity as you might wish to afford him, so I would keep this to ourselves unless you wish to suffer something a little more permanent." "Yes, Tall Tony." Kevin said as he got his pants off and bent over, clasping his hands on a chair and presenting his buttocks to me. "I am now ready for your lesson in my humility." "Such a lesson you will receive." I agreed. "And be glad that Big Jacob is a rather forgiving man, but his patience has several severe limitationisms, and foremost among these is people who refuse to learn their lessons upon their first applicationship." I positioned myself to align my spit-slicked pud to his dark crevice and judged where the entrance had to be. "And now we will commence with the aforementioned working over." I shoved into him and he yelped out loud. Good, I thought to myself, Big Jacob said that he wanted this guy to yell out. But also to beg, I remembered. So I began to fuck him, slowly and smoothly, taking my time with every move into his body and every pull out of those quivering pale orbs of his buttocks. "Oh, God, man!" Kevin panted. "You are doing things to me I never even thought about before! Shit, man, fuck me harder!" I maintained my aloofhood and continued my slow pace. "Oh, God, faster, man, faster! Come on, you can do it faster!" I turned a deaf ear to his entreaties. Big Jacob's words were my gospelism. "Oh, God, please, Tall Tony, fuck me faster, please, Tall Tony, faster, please, God, please, man, faster, please!" That was the begging which I was expected to elicitate from this man per Big Jacob's instructions and I therefore now honored his request. Besides, my own jewels were beginning to groan from their own urgencies, and so it was also a matter of my own self-interest to begin to do a real butt-pounding move on this recalitrantist bookie nee shopkeeper. And so with my dong afire, I rammed his Irish butt until it was glowing from his perspirates and sweat began to ball up and run down over the shiny globes that I was plowing between. I was working up quite a sweat myself, I must admit, and I grabbed hold of his hips and performed a set of rapid-hunching that any male rabbit would be proud to claim as his own. That made this guy howl and as he yodeled like the proverbial wolf, I heard the meaty splats of his jizz as it landed on the chair and the floor and Kevin threw his head back and he howled at the invisible moon overhead beyond the roof of this building. My job here was done and I could now take my own satisfaction with no worry about disappointing Big Jacob when I reported to him and so I performed a movement I like to call the Italian twist-and-roll which is a movement of my hips that really rings the bell of my partner in every way it can be rung, and does a number on my own bell-clapper which I am swinging, and I brought myself to my fruitionship and I settled for a more dignified groan as I slammed my rod in deep and I pumped my load so far inside him that he couldn't get rid of it in less than a day or so of steady straining on the pot. My glowbugs of delight turned out to electric eels, and they latched onto my brain and wrung it completely dry with their static-shock treatment, and I saw all those pretty colored lights you see when your body goes into overload just before it tries to shut down entirely. I parted myself from Kevin after I finished and I fished my handkerchief which is always clean and I wiped my dong clean of the juices that it had picked up inside Kevin while I was fucking him, and I was glad that he must have evacuated his bowels shortly before I arrived, for those juices were mostly clear and I wadded it up and stuffed it into my pants pocket. "Now Big Jacob says let that be a reminder to you not to be a dim-bulb and tinker with the receipts in future. He has a very good idea of how much you should be turning over to him, and as long as you are satisfied with your percentage, you can grow old and die of natural causes, rather than from a lack of ability of being able to swim while wearing concrete blocks tied to each foot, if you catch my drift." "I understand." Kevin said. "From now on, I'll be a good boy, I promise. Whoof! I've learned my lesson, yes, sir!" "That is good." I said as I finished putting my clothes back into shape and I put on my hat, helped myself to a clean handkerchief from a display of same that he had near the register, and I gave him a farewell touch of the brim of my hat as I grinned and left him there, having to clean up a fucked butt and come on the floor of his hardware store. I reported back to Big Jacob, only to find that he was expecting me with more than a little excitations. "Tall Tony, I am amazed." he says to me. "Why is that, if I may so bold as to inquire?" I says in return. "I just got off the phone with Kevin McCormick. He apologized to me most fervently for his past misbehaviors and promises to pay every penny of his future take upon one condition, that you personally go to pick it up from him every week." He gave me a most peculiar stare. "If you want me to do that, then of course I will." I said. "That is not my source of curiosity." Big Jacob said. "I cannot help but wonder from the way that he spoke if you did misunderstand my instructions on how to handle him. When a man is sporting a set of bruises from a hard working over with fists until he begs the man to stop hitting him, he is usually not too keen to have that man come back for regular visits, if you see my perplexifications here." "I do indeed." I said. "And I fear that we did have a misunderstanding upon our prior conversationhood, for which I offer my most hearty repententship and shall endeavor to do better in future if I can." Big Jacob waved his hand. "I am interested in results." He said. "I am not sure of the measures you used on Kevin McCormick, but if you can turn a petty thief like him into a reliable operator for me, then I shall ask you to use the same tactics in all my future troubles." "I am glad that you take this viewpoint upon my misapprehensionisms." I said. "And I will take a great deal of pleasure in acting as your representative in this sort of future occasionosities, even if it was born from a failure to communicate." Big Jacob gave me the wave to indicate he was done with me, and I stepped out to go get myself a steak dinner at Rita's nearby. If I was going to be Big Jacob's special troubleshooter, I was going to need all the strength I could get! THE END Comments, Complaints or Suggestions? Send E-mail to Tommyhawk1@AOL.COM. WWW.TOMMYHAWKSFANTASYWORLD.COM WWW.TOMMYHAWKSROGUEMOON.COM