Date: Mon, 26 Aug 2002 21:13:02 -0400 (EDT)
From: Rob Andresen <malricnyc@excite.com>
Subject: A Man After Midnight

	Have you ever had one of those moments when everything in your life
suddenly changes with just a single eye-opening event?  You know the ones,
the first time you saw a man naked and got hard or the first time you saw
your child?  I was privileged to have seen both in my life although it was
a development born out of pain and denial for me.
	And yet, here I was at 45, coming out to myself and the community
for the first time since divorcing my wife, exploring the gay lifestyle in
a youth obsessed culture that at least valued my commitment to health.  It
was an interesting feeling, wanting to be a part of something that was
alien to me in so many ways, aching for the connection to others who felt
just like me and not quite knowing how to go about finding them.
	Sure, there were a few men at the bars that were around my age or
older but there was something about them I couldn't seem to accept.  Maybe
it was their exceptionally effeminate mannerisms or the lisping brainless
conversation or just the vain attempt at hiding the signs and scars of
experience with flashy clothes and a hint of mascara but I didn't care for
what I saw.
	Yet where else was there for me?  I had found this place largely by
catching their float at the last gay pride parade as I and a couple of
coworkers passed by for lunch.  Gino made some rude comment and I was
captivated by the go-go- boy gyrating atop the wobbly float to hammering
music, simulating an act I was almost desperate to try with another man.
	I caught the name of the bar on the side but it took me another
four months to get up the courage to venture out.  I mean, this had been my
town for years and my wife and boys still lived here as well.  I had to
keep part of my desires secret for fear of being exposed and yet I had
these desires of being exposed with another man.
	The torture of knowledge and indecision finally caught up with me
and I dressed for the occasion: faded jeans over hiking boots and a
burgundy shirt with a diagonal accent stripe.  Hey, I was old, not out of
style!
	My heart was pounding as I parked the car in a lot five blocks
away, just to disguise my destination.  The lights over the doorway were
bright and the thumping music vibrated the sidewalk as I neared the door.
	A fiver for cover and a bored expression from the bouncer and I
walked into a dimly lit cavern that smelled of men and cologne and sweat
and smoke.  The faces turned toward the open door flashed into my mind, a
snapshot of bored and desperate men lined against a liquor stained bar.
	I retreated to the far side, angling against the dark wall to gain
perspective and figure out my next move.  There were stairs leading down to
a wall of sound I imagined held writhing bodies drenched in sweat and a
doorway that led to a room filled with flashes of light and music less
loud.  Another hallway seemed to hold a line of men that moved forward
slowly if at all and against the furthest wall, a small stage draped in
worn rainbow flags with a sparkled ball above.
	I guess I was just in time for the show to start since someone
closed the door to the lower dance floor and a drum roll sounded over aged
speakers before Don Pardo's gay twin announced, "And now, boys and girls of
all ages, it's time for Mr. C's Nite-time revue and everyone's favorite
retro group Abba-nana!"
	The lights dimmed and a spotlight hit the rotating disco ball to
throw sparkles around the room.  Conversations didn't seem to falter
despite the competition from the music thumping from the speakers.  I had
grow up with Abba and was pleased to know that they were back in
popularity.
	Two girls got onto the stage and began lip synching to `Take a
Chance on Me'.  I too the chance and snaked my way through the sea of men
in rayon and suddenly had a vision of polyester and Saturday Night Fever.
	I ordered a beer, paid my nine bucks, and wandered back to the wall
where I was able to see the stage without a support beam in the way.
	The music was different, a hit of a disco beat but with more bass
and a stronger back beat driving the music at a greater speed.  The songs
went from one right into another with the two girls dancing on stage and
looking for all the world like Agnetha and Frida.  It wasn't until they
threw their heads back that I realized that both of them had Adam's apples!
They were men in drag!
	I was amazed but thrilled to see how good they were.  As I was
concentrating on the one playing Agnetha, two men sidled onto the stage, no
doubt to play Benny and Bjorn.  The song changed over and suddenly the
music sped up, the two "girls" sidled off stage and the boys turned around
and began singing, "gimme, gimme, gimme a man after midnight."
	The crowd loved this and began getting into the music, calling out
to the guys on stage.  And that's when I had my moment.  Because there, on
the stage, in front of hundreds of men, lip synching to Abba was my son,
Adrian!
	The beer fell from my nerveless fingers as I suddenly came face to
face with a new reality for which I was not prepared.  As the beer bottle
caromed off the feet of people near me I stood there with my jaw dropped a
foot and my heart hammering into my temple.
	He couldn't be here, it wasn't possible.  I tried to deny what I
was seeing but as I stared at him, the features became even more distinct
and I knew that it truly was my son, his bearded face round and flushed
with the effort.  I rationalized what my eyes were seeing and determined
that he was just singing, after all, there was no way he was gay.
	But then he turned to the man playing Bjorn and kissed him, mouth
open and tongues reaching across a short gap between them.  The crowd went
wild, applauding and egging them on.  They broke their kiss, turned back
and began lip synching to "Mamma Mia."
	I stood there, my eyes blank as I watched him mash his polyester
covered pelvis against Bjorn's satin pants, their contact sending sparks in
flashes across the eyes of the audience.
	They separated and the two `girls' came back out to follow on with
Waterloo and would it up with their own kiss to "Voulez Vous."  The lights
came up a little and the announcer made some inane comment about the
performers being great.
	All four came out, held hands, bowed, they kissed as `opposite'
couples and then turned and kissed, man to man and woman to woman.  The
audience went wild again, encouraging them once more.  The lights went out,
the music dropped off and all you could hear for a brief moment was the
sexual thunder beat from downstairs before the lights came back up a bit
and some top 40 hits squeaked from the speakers once more.
	I was shaking as Adrian stepped off the stage, still holding
`Bjorn's' hand.  They accepted the congratulations and well wishes of the
boys at the front of the floor before making their way toward the bar,
almost directly in front of me.  They kissed again and `Bjorn' headed off
to some other place leaving my son standing six feet in front of me at the
bar.
	I'm not sure if it was fear or stupefaction that kept me from
moving away but I stood, trembling, a short distance rom my son as he
ordered a beer and took a swig.  I stared at him, seeing him for the first
time in a long time.
	My wife and I had divorced four years ago when Adrian was 18 and
his sister was 16.  I hadn't seen much of him after that, my desperation
and desires keeping me from maintaining any sort of contact for fear of
being discovered.  I knew that he had done well in college and was, in
fact, just getting ready to graduate with a degree in International
political science.
	I gazed at him in wonder, his strong jaw a copy of my own, his
brown hair tousled, the tips wet with seat from his performance.  He had a
ready grin and a white smile that sparkled in the bar's poor lighting.  He
was my height and a little stocky but from muscle, not fat.  The satin
shirt he wore rode up over thick biceps and I saw the beginnings of a tatoo
ringing his right arm.
	He filled out his shirt well, the threads shimmering in the light
as he moved in place, almost dancing to the hidden music piped overhead.
There was a lot to admire about my boy but here I was staring.  The guy to
my left made a comment and began laughing, backing into me and stepping on
my hikers with his Bruno Magli peaks.
	I stopped him from backing up any further and he made some vague
apology as I pushed him forward toward his group.
	When I turned back to return my attention to Adrian I found that he
had turned to see the commotion and he was staring at me, his mouth open in
unknowing imitation of my own from moments earlier.  I flushed intensely
and averted my eyes, wishing for the floor to open up and swallow me into a
fiery pit.
	He recovered faster than me and strode over to me, his eyes wide in
wonder as he came to stand in front of me, his hands resting on narrow
hips.
	"What the hell are you doing here?" he accused, his mouth turned
down in a grimace.
	I couldn't answer, I just shook before him, my mind blanking on
possible actions or words.  He stood before me for a few moments before he
began to realize that I was having a difficult time breathing.  He grabbed
my arm and began drawing me toward the door.
	"Come on, let's go outside.  I think you need some fresh air."  He
nodded at those who smiled at him and even deflected a snide comment or two
as we crested the wave of boys and headed toward the open sea once more.
	It was chilly outside and my flesh prickled, my nipples bouncing to
erection in the soft breeze as we turned the building's corner and came to
a rest against the short wall that separated the alley from the parking lot
next to the bar.
	I leaned against the stone, shaking as my son held my shoulders,
his voice low and calming as he tried to ease my shock.
	"It's all right, Dad.  I know it must have been a shock but there's
nothing wrong here.  It's all right."
	I calmed down a bit and stopped shaking but I slowly shook my head,
not in denial but refuting his statements.  He went quiet as I started
mumbling, the words falling out of my mouth but not making sense to him or
me.
	"Look, Dad.  I think you need to sit down somewhere.  My place is
just down the block.  Do you think you can make it there?"  I nodded and
stumbled along as he guided me to his brownstone apartment, leaning me
against the door frame as he unlocked the door and led me up the stairs to
the fourth floor walkup.
	It was decorated in a retro style that paid homage to the 70's
without being too kitsch.  His sofa was leather, not naugahyde but done in
a deep purple that no cow would ever be.  He dropped me on the sofa and
went into the kitchen to get me a glass of water.
	Sitting next to me, he flipped the remote for the stereo and a
dance beat thumped across the hardwood floors.  Another click and the music
softened somewhat, soothing my mental ache to a dull roar.
	I swallowed half the glass in a gulp and held the frosted tumbler
between sweaty palms, unsure of the next move.  Adrian made it, turning my
face to his and staring into my red rimmed pupils.
	"All right, Dad, it's time to come clean with me.  What the hell
were you doing at rumors?"
	I took a shuddering breath and let it out in a prayer filled sigh
before I began.
	"I was there because I needed to get out, to be with others who
were like me, I needed to see what there is for me.  I needed to see what
it was like to be with other men who felt like me, who wanted to be with
men."
	Adrian stared at me for a moment, his mouth slightly open behind
the short beard, before he chuckled.  "Oh.  I see."  He sat there for a
moment, a bright wonderment in his eyes as he took in all the implications
of what I was telling him.
	"So, Dad," he whispered.  "And just when did you realize you were
gay?"
	A shudder slipped through my body as my life flashed behind closed
lids.  I opened my eyes again and gazed into my boy's brown pools.
	"I guess I've always know, since before I was in college, but I
just never thought I could let myself be gay, be with men.  Sure, I fooled
around in high school jacking off with my friends.  I even kissed a buddy
and laughed when our stubbled chins made rasping sounds.  But I knew I had
to be a man, be a dad, get married and have kids.  I couldn't continue with
other guys.
	"But then I found myself thinking about it more and more when you
were in high school.  You remember, I went to all of your soccer games and
watched you play for the jazz band at the basketball games.  All those
boys, turning into young men and you along with them.  And then their
fathers, every one a man I thought about wrapping my arms around, kissing
and holding.
	"I tried to ignore it, then I tried to drum it out with therapy,
then I tried to screw my way out of it, cheating on your Mom before she
caught me, and then I just gave up.  That's when your Mom and I got
divorced.  I told her it was because we had grown apart and the affairs
made it easier for her to accept that.  I couldn't tell her that I was
trying to hide my attraction to men."
	I looked up at my son and was surprised to see a flush on his face.
	"Oh, Dad.  Damn, you sure have a way with words.  You really had
the hots for my friends in high school?"
	"Hell, son, I was trying to look at every man around.  I even
caught you playing with yourself that night the start of your senior year,
remember?"
	He flushed with the memory of my opening the door on him, his hands
pulling the covers over his throbbing boy cock, trying to hide his actions.
I chuckled at his new reaction to a past event and smiled.
	"Hey, it was a good way of starting the `birds, bees, and
responsibility' talk I knew we had to have."
	There was moisture in his eyes as he grinned back at me.
	"Well, Dad, there's one thing you didn't know, even back then.  I
was gay in high school and I was fantasizing about you when you caught be
jacking off.  I always thought you were such a hot man!"
	I stared at my boy, the bald admission sending neurons firing in my
brain and nether head, sparkles dancing across my vision.
	"Wh...wh...what?"
	He chuckled.  "Dad, I've always been attracted to older men,
daddies, if you will, and I always figured it was because I idolized you
when I was growing up.  I always wanted to be like you, I just never
realized how much like you I really was!"
	The realization hit me and I began to laugh, the rumble bubbling
from my belly until I let it out in a half bark that continued into a
recognition of the hilarity of it all.  Adrian joined me and we chortled
for several minutes at the understanding that the apple did not fall far
from the tree in our family.
	As we sat, basking in the warmth of a companionable aura, I began
to realize that I was becoming aroused, my Son's admission sending thoughts
flashing through my mind.  He seemed to have a similar reaction as we
looked into each other's eyes.
	"Dad," he whispered.  "I have always wanted to find a man like you,
I always wanted a man like you."
	I swallowed dryly as I realized what I was feeling.  "Adrian, I
always loved you and I always thought you were such a handsome man."  We
sat for a moment, the atmosphere coalescing until he leaned forward, his
crinkly face fur rubbing against my smooth lips before his tongue tickled
them open to meet mine in an oral embrace.
	I closed my eyes, his hot breath sustaining me and swallowing away
uncertainty and doubt as we kissed, man to man, for the first time in his
life.  I reveled in the sensation of my son's soft lips caressing mine as
he moved back and forth, sending his tongue into my cheeks and swirling
around my own erect mouth muscle.
	I felt his hands on my shoulders, massaging away fear and thought
as I sank into a sea of emotion and sensation, conscious efforts dwindling
away to mere reactions to his efforts.  He ran his hands down my arms,
grasping my biceps and testing their strength.  He ran his hands back up to
my shoulders before beginning a new exploration down my chest, coming to
rest against my pecs, his palms soft grinding into my perky nipples,
sending sparks through nerves I didn't know I owned.
	He broke off the kiss and gazed into my eyes, moisture reflecting a
warmth I was afraid to acknowledge.  "I love you, Dad," he whispered as he
closed his eyes and dove in for another oral embrace.
	I surrendered to the passion he passed over to me and brought my
own hands to his face, caressing the bristly covering that hid cheeks red
with effort.  I massaged behind his ears, a place he had loved being
touched when he was just a boy.
	He signed into my lips, his body softening slightly under the
caress.  He began brushing his hands across my chest, teasing open the
buttons without me being remotely aware he was doing so.  I realized what
had happened when I felt his palm brushing against my chest fur, sparking
new bolts of energy along my spine to nestle at the base of my growing
cock.
	I moaned my appreciation and gratitude and he gently pinched my
erect nubbins between his fingers and twirled his fingertips through by
dense fur.  I ran my hands down his silken shirt and across his biceps,
their fleshy hardness quivering beneath my palms.
	He continued moving his hands in such a way that my shirt was
opened in short order and he ran his hands up over my shoulders and back,
sliding the fabric along my firing nerves down my back and arms, revealing
my torso as I dropped my hands to complete the unveiling.
	He ran his hands up my chest, sending shivers down my back as we
continued to kiss, his tongue jousting with mine.  I felt exposed in a way
I knew I wanted as my Son continued to caress my body and my soul with his
hands, his tongue, his love.
	I was slipping into a comfortable cloud of sensation when he
stopped his saliva soaked forays and slid down my face to kiss and nibble
on my chin.  His moustache tickled my lower lip as he chewed on my face,
sliding back to gnaw gently on my neck.  He must have hit a nerve or a vein
because I felt warm and could hear my heart pounding in my ears as he
continued down to my shoulder, his beard caressing and gently scratching my
tender skin.
	He pushed me back slowly as he continued along my shoulder to rest
his face in my collarbone, his tongue flicking forward to dance along my
fur line.  He drooled a trail down from my collar bone to my left nipple,
swirling his moisture laden tongue around it before clamping down with his
lips, further arousing them into inflamed knobs of nerves.
	He chewed on my chest for several minutes, trailing spit across to
the other nipple and treating it fairly before returning to his original
target.  I leaned against the sofa, sparks shooting behind my closed eye
lids as he led me along paths of flannel feelings.
	I had been passive through these beginnings but I wanted to know my
Son's body as well and I knew that he would continue finding ways to
pleasure me if I let him.  So I forced myself to lean forward, looking at
his soft face, a contrast in innocense and sin, the beard trying
unsuccessfully to conceal a baby face of flushed cheek and smooth skin.
	I unbuttoned his shirt, less unobtrusively than he had with me, but
succeeding just as well, revealing a nicely formed chest, a light dusting
of brown fur forming a `T' from nipple to nipple and leading down to
treasures buried in designer disco packaging below.
	I ran my hands across his chest, sending waves of sensation across
his skin, arousing his purple nubbins and creating goose bumps across his
pecs.  He shivered against me, his lips resting against my sternum, the fur
mixing with his beard to create shadows and highlights in the hair.
	I pushed him back on his haunches and reached beneath his arm pits
to rest in soft tufts of fur before lifting up, letting him rise to stand
before me.  I looked up into my Son's eyes and saw acceptance and agreement
there before I looked down at the Christmas present wrapped up before me.
	The belt was easy enough to open sliding tighter across his hips
before releasing themselves and opening like a morning flower.  The pant
buttons were more difficult, partly from my inexperience and partly because
the pants appeared to be new.  But a little leverage and they too flowered
open, revealing the continuation of his treasure trail leading into low
rise briefs of deep blue.
	I peeled back the flaps of his pants and they slid over his hips
quickly, whispering down to rest on his ankles. I reached down and slipped
off his shoes before he stepped out of the shimmering fabric, revealing
hair covered legs leading upward to a bulging pair of cotton briefs.
	I held his hips, gently rubbing them as I watched his growing mound
twitching beneath the cotton barrier, hinting at the fleshy staff that
lurked below.  I licked my lips and looked back up at Adrian.  He smiled at
me, his eyes filled with wonder and suppressed need.
	"Do it, Dad," he whispered.  I complied, my hands easing cotton
over skin, sliding the fabric barrier down his hips, releasing his growing
member to slap up against his belly, a spiderweb strand of precum flashing
out and across my shoulder.  I gazed at my son's cock, it's length
increasing as I watched in wonder.
	I was no slouch in the size department but my son had done me one
better.  Actually, he had done me three better as I estimated him at eleven
inches in length and a handspan in diameter.  I was seven inches long but
did have the advantage in width stretching even the most season
cocksucker's mouth with my beer can prick.
	I grasped his rod sending a shiver up his spine to poke a gasp from
his lips.  He felt warm and soft despite his strength flowing through
spongy membranes.  I slid my hand along his length, amazed at the time it
took to complete my travels before I reversed course and returned to the
nest of fur that covered his base.
	Having felt the goods, I decided I needed to taste them, snapping
my tongue out to flick against the purple head, a pearl gum drop oozing
from his mushroom cleft against my taster.  He was earthy, a taste of wood
and water against my lips as I enveloped his crown with my mouth and gently
sucked against the turgid flesh.
	He groaned and slid forward a bit, demanding further attention.
But, despite my relative inexperience, I knew that there was more to be
gained from the tease before release so I didn't allow any more of his
sugar cane to slid down my throat.  Instead I swirled my tongue around the
crest of his mushroom, driving him back in surprised pleasure.
	That's when I swallowed him down, his cock lodging in my throat
where my neck muscles massaged his fleshy shaft.  I pulled back before I
began seeing stars and laved his prick again before moving forward for a
repeat performance.  He groaned as I buried his prick in my mouth and slid
back, the friction drawing across tender nerve fibers.  I face fucked
myself on his cock as he stood there, letting me control the flow as I
tasted his sweet pores of meat.
	He started shuddering and I knew that he was not going to last much
longer.  He moaned a warning to me but I clamped down on his meat staff and
sucked his cock to drain as much juice as I could get from his fur soaked
balls.
	He gave me my just desserts as the first fusillade of jism exploded
against my tonsils, coating my mouth with his saltwater taffy cream for
shot after shot.  He filled my oral cavity quickly and I had to swallow,
contracting against his cock and sending him into a second climax almost
immediately.  He held my head into his crotch, grinding his bush into my
face and sending his cum down my hungry throat.
	After he sent a final volley along my tongue, he stood, shaking,
letting me lave his pole clean, ensuring that I had every last drop of his
goodness.  Gathering his strength, he stepped back, kneeled down, and in a
few quick movements, opened my straining trousers to reveal my own cum
drooling rod.  He quirked an eyebrow at the lack of underwear and I nodded
a sheepish grin.  Yes, I had been hoping to get lucky tonight, I just
hadn't considered how lucky I would be.
	He leaned me back against the sofa back again and straddled my
legs, his cantaloupe ass cheeks opening to envelop my cock.  As I slid up
his velvet love chute I began seeing sparks dance in his eyes as my member
slid along unmoistened walls to come to rest against his cum knob.
	He sat down in my lap, his drooling cock softening against my furry
belly and oozing a trail of boy slime across my navel.  He rose above my
groin, pulling my cock with it until it released my staff to slide toward
the opening.  When only my cock head was inside his hole, he dropped back
down burying my cock inside himself and mashing my balls with his firm
flesh mounds.
	He didn't have to continue his anal exercises for long, I hadn't
had sex in so long that I was ready to burst in a few short moments.  I
tried to hold off as long as I could but the effort was too much and as my
vision became blurred from the lack of oxygen to the brain, my cock head
decided to finish the job and send a shock wave down my cock and into my
balls where my cum was churning for release.
	I cried out and raised my ass, burying my cock in my boy's man
cunt, releasing a stampede of man sperm into Adrian's ass.  Not content
just to shoot, I dropped down and raise myself up again, fucking my cum out
of my cock and into my boy's butt with every stroke.
	He tensed as I went down, squeezing my shaft dry before the next
fuck forward and shot of cream sped into his depths.  I must have shot a
gallon of cum into my boy before exhaustion and post-climax nerves dropped
me to the leather below.
	Adrian sat down on my lap and leaned forward to kiss me.  He was
soft and gentle with me, almost afraid to lose my drooping cock as he
licked against my lips, his beard rustling against my smooth skin in the
quiet room.  I hugged him to me, his smoother skin so soft next to my fur
covered torso.
	As we sat there, the music began intruding on the moment once more
and I started laughing.  It was Abba, playing in the background.  Adrian
leaned back and grinned at me.  As Benny, Bjorn, Agnetha and Frida sang to
my boy and me, I chuckled.  After all, I really had found my man after
midnight!


Let me know what you think!  Rob