This is my account of the very first intimate experience I ever
had with another person, and it continues to be a radiating emotional and
sensual memory. It was written as accurately as possible from the actual events
as I remember them. There is very little embellishment, though the dialogue is
almost entirely reconstructed, as remembering such details is nearly impossible
after 45 years. If so inclined, do feel free to leave comments at
monsearkus@gmail.com.
Exploring Cousins
Every summer for as long as I could remember, my parents would
drive down to Florida from New York to visit all our relatives who lived in
Miami.
My cousin Robin would always be lucky enough to join us (I was
pretty luck too, since the two-day journey would be ridiculously boring
otherwise).
In the summer of 1974, my family packed up and headed down south
to the sunshine state once again. Robin and I had recently both turned eleven
(he was 2 months my senior).
After visiting all the relatives, we normally dropped in on during
each trip-- as well as enjoying the traditionally great times on the beach and
in the ocean--we headed back to New York. But this time, we drove back with an
additional passenger.
My younger cousin Jason, who was nine at the time, was taking his
vacation by coming to New York and New Jersey. He was going to stay at my house
in Staten Island for a while with Robin before heading at my Robin's house for
the rest of his stay. His mom would then fly up to bring Jason back home
afterward.
Jason always seemed a little effeminate to me, which certainly
didn't bother me at all. As a matter of fact, though I didn't realize in a
logical sense it at the time, I kind of liked it.
Jason was a lot shorter than Robin and I,
and with his ridiculously thin frame, he looked more like six years than he did
nine.
I didn't know it at the time, mostly because boys never Inuit such
things at an early age, but I discovered later that Jason was gay. I can't help
but wonder if the events that would soon unfold had any bearing on his future
sexual preferences, or if he was just born that way.
To be honest, I don't remember much about the time and activities
of Jason's stay in New York, except for two particular days
which are burned into my psyche.
One day during Jason's stay with us, my mom drove us all to my
wealthy aunt's house, who happened to have a huge built in swimming pool in her
enclosed yard.
We were having fun in the pool during that hot and sunny day.
Though Jason was a bit timid and quirky at times, we were all pretty much
getting along--except for those times that Robin picked on Jason as he often did
or made fun of his `scrawny' body, as Robin would call it.
I remember the direct sun was making me feel really
good and a little horny. I now assume the same was the case for my
cousins as well since I later learned why... that the summer sun promotes extra
release of serotonin and dopamine. Not only that, but the extra vitamin D from
sunlight exposure increases production of testosterone.
Yeah, when I learned all about that, it was a true `A ha' moment
for me.
Again, I didn't realize why at the time, but I liked looking at
Jason that day when we played in the pool--especially at his very tight, black
bathing suit. They were speedos (though I don't think that's what they were
called back then).
I can clearly remember looking at Jason's bathing suit a lot that
day as the summer sun made me more and more horny.
I didn't think it as wrong at the time, which was odd, since
homosexual thoughts or desires were detested in my very large family. I suppose
I just felt that I was enjoying how it looked, and nothing more. Ah, the pure
naivety of an Ellen year old boy.
His bathing suite seemed so tight on him that he kept having to
stretch the waist bands and thigh bands all day.
I also remember how the outline of his little dick seemed to keep
drawing my attention. I could clearly see the outline of his cock head, which I
thought looked pretty cool.
In my mind it was an innocent attraction of something that I also
physically possessed, only it was cool to see it under my cousin's tight
bathing suit.
It was because Jason's bathing suit kept commanding my interest,
that I didn't reject Robin's brazen suggestion outright.
Without Jason noticing, Robin had leaned into me and whispered in
my ear.
"I am gonna go under water and pretend I
am putting your dick in my mouth. Then, you pretend you're doing it to me, and
we'll convince Jason to really do it to both of us."
I remember thinking that even with blurred underwater vision, my
younger cousin would see through our ruse.
Without my even agreeing to him, Robin approached our younger
cousin.
"Hey Jason, go under water and watch this."
With that, Robin turned to face me and went below the water with
Justin followed him down.
Robin quickly pulled down my bathing suits and came as close to my
dick with his face as anyone had ever come. He then blew air out, causing a
camouflage of bubbles as he pretended to put my soft cock in his mouth.
I remember feeling awkward and silly at this game. Especially
because It seemed wrong to me to even be playing it.
Looking at my cousin's bathing suit was one thing, but
pretending to put cocks in our mouths was entirely different.
When they both came up to the surface, my younger cousin wasn't
buying it.
"You didn't put it in your mouth, Robin. I'm not stupid."
"Yes, I did and now he's gonna put mine
in his mouth."
Deciding to go along with this stupid game, I submerged beneath
the surface till my face was at the level of Robin's bathing suit.
I then pulled down his trunks.
Robin's dick was hard as I lowered the bathing suit and as I came
close to it, I opened my mouth for a better effect.
Jason's face was a foot away to the right.
I was surprised when Robin pushed his hips forward, sliding his
dick head into my mouth and over my tongue.
I immediately wanted to push away and come up to the surface to
curse out my cousin, but I could see Jason's face watching intently. I didn't
want to be the game buster.
Instead, I felt like, well...what's the expression?
'In for a penny, in for a pound.'
I simply closed my lips around Robin's hard cock and stayed like
that for a few seconds.
Though my vision was quite blurry, I could see that Jason was
watching me, so I was going to give him a show.
The sensation of Robin's cock in my mouth was weird, more because
I had a mouth full of water, than anything else. I also felt a tiny bit a
grossed out by it. After all, another boy's dick was in my mouth and the only
time such things are spoken about was when boys insulted each other.
Yet at the same time there was a fresh new feeling of being
naughty; of engaging in an act that was essentially forbidden for boys to
do--especially in devout Christian cultures, of which our whole family belonged.
But the effect of the sunlight on my hormones made it more palatable.
I noticed Jason going back up to the surface, so I stopped the
ruse and resurfaced myself.
When I came back up, Jason's mouth was wide open in shock.
"Wow!" Was all he said.
My cousin Robin again took the lead.
"Want to try it, Jason?"
Jason suddenly looked as if Robin was trying to trick him. After
all, it was always Robin who treated Jason like a little kid, playing pranks on
him and teasing him often.
And yet Jason's eyes had clearly seen Robin's dick in my mouth for
at least five seconds.
"Ok, but you do it to me first."
Robin rolled his eyes.
"Fine."
He went under water, and I followed him.
I watched as Robin pulled Jason's bathing suit down--with
difficulty from how tight it was--and saw Jason's partial erection flop out.
Robin licked the headfirst, probably trying to determine if he
could go through with this. But a moment later, he opened his mouth and took in
Jason's cock.
I came up to the surface to see Jason's eyes closed, a ridiculous
expression of bliss painted on his face (though it could also have easily been
agony from the contorted eyes and mouth).
From the surface, I could see Robin's head bobbing up and down on
my younger cousin's dick. He spent a lot more time on Jason than I had on
him--actually, it seemed a lot more time than I had expected he would if his
plan had been to have Jason do that to us.
Was Robin enjoying what he was doing to Jason?
Before long, I was rock hard. After all, I had never seen someone
getting or giving a blowjob, not even in pictures.
I remember wondering if this had been Robin's actual plan all
along--to get us all to suck on each other by lying to me about tricking our
younger cousin.
After about 30 seconds, Robin surfaced and told Jason that it was
his turn to do it to him.
Jason flat out refused, which really irritated my cousin Robin
quite a bit.
"I did it to you, asshole!"
"Yeah, but I don't want to do it."
My cousin Robin kept berating Jason, something I always hated him
doing when he felt the need to be an ass to our little cousin. It caused Jason
to leave the pool and run into the house, his erection tenting up his bathing
suit.
I was terrified that he was going to tell my mom and my aunt what
had happened, so I left the pool quickly to follow him. I turning to Robin as I
left the pool.
"You're an asshole!"
Thankfully, Jason had not gone upstairs to tell anyone anything.
Instead, I followed his wet footprints toward the bathroom on the pool level
where we had all changed into our bathing suits.
I approached the semi opened door slowly and peaked through the
crack to see if he was getting dressed.
Jason's bathing suit was on the floor, and with his eyes closed
and an odd look on his face, he was furiously pulling and squeezing his
erection.
It clearly looked as if he had no clue as to what he was doing,
and I couldn't help but wonder if he had ever even jerked off.
I watched him intently and was completely fascinated at seeing
another boy playing with himself.
My own erection, which had deflated a bit after leaving the pool
in terror of Jason telling on us, was quickly becoming stiff once again.
I stayed there, rubbing my erection through my wet trunks for a
few seconds.
My reverie was soon interrupted when Robin came up behind me and
quickly stormed through the door of the bathroom.
"Well look at that!"
He was looking down at Jason's erection in his hand.
"Looks like our little cousin liked what I did to him, huh?".
I came into the bathroom just as Robin was pulling his trunks
down.
His erection bounced up against his stomach.
"It's your turn now, Jason!"
It was an angry command that would not be questioned.
I remember suddenly feeling odd about what was happening. This was
no longer a fun game of exploration. The angry way in which Robin was speaking
to Jason as well as the terrified expression on my little cousin's face was
making me want to stop Robin.
But for some reason I couldn't.
My erection began to die rather quickly, but Robin wasn't going to
let me stand on the sidelines.
"Pull yours down too. He's gonna suck
both of us!"
I don't know why I even listened, but I assume it was the fact
that I was caught in this virgin exploration of sexuality, even if it was being
forced on one of us.
I robotically dropped my bathing suit to the floor and stepped out
of them.
Robin looked back at Jason and pointed to the floor in front of
him.
Jason said nothing. He just complied and squatted down till he was
on his knees--a fearful look shrouding his face.
Looking down at Jason, I suddenly felt really
bad for him. It was clear that he was being forced to do something he
didn't want to do.
I wanted to say something. I wanted to stand up for my younger
cousin, but I was caught up in the moment and just stood there, frozen.
I noticed that Jason's erection was deflating quite rapidly from
what he was being forced to do.
When he stuck Robin's dick in his mouth, Jason's eyes were closed tight,
and his face looked as if he was swallowing cod liver oil.
"Watch your teeth!"
I was because of his angry tone, that felt as if Robin was
treating our little cousin like some slave boy.
Jason opened his eyes, looking up at Robin with a little fear
which was quickly followed by a lot of rage.
After about a minute, Robin pushed Jason's head off his cock and
pointed sideways to me.
"His turn."
I really didn't want this at all. It wasn't right.
But I also didn't want to annoy Robin who had a bad temper.
My reticence to continue was quite obvious by my flaccid penis. A
fact that was not lost on Jason--Only a few seconds after he had me in his
mouth, he pull off of me and turned back toward my
cousin's cock instead.
He was about to put Robin's back in his mouth when Robin
objective.
"You hardly blew him, Jason."
Jason looked at mine with a disgusted look on his face.
"His is soft and mushy."
I was immediately embarrassed and feeling totally inadequate,
especially since i had now seen both of my cousin's
erections and by far, mine was the biggest.
I knew what we were doing was wrong. Or at least I was feeling
guilty about it and I remembered thinking that it may
have been a lot of fun doing this had all us wanted to do it to each other,
without being forced. I also remember thinking that it would probably be a lot
more fun if Jason and I explored each other alone, without Robin. But these
thoughts immediately felt wrong as well.
Looking down at my young cousin kneeling so subserviently on the
floor with my Robin's cock in his mouth, I was convinced that this was totally
and sinfully wrong-- boys were not supposed to do such things to each other, especially
if they were being forced.
But a large part of me was feeling excited, nonetheless.
As my young cousin kept sucking on Robin's cock, something caught
my eye down between at Jason`s hips. His cock, which
had been soft a moment ago, was rapidly getting hard. I also noticed that the
look of disgust Jason had displayed a moment earlier, was now replaced with one
of intention and purpose--he was clearly happier having an erection in his mouth
than my `soft and squishy' penis.
The more I looked at Jason going up and down over Robin`s cock---slowly and methodically--the more it occurred
to me that in some way, Jason must be enjoying what he was doing.
I was starting to get hard again very quickly by this realization,
when the erotic moment was shattered by the sound of my mother's voice just
outside the door.
"Are you boys getting dressed? Lunch is ready and we leave in 30 minutes."
Jason shot off the floor, almost knocking me over.
"OK mom'" I helped Jason regain his balance, "we just got out of
the pool."
The adventure had come to a quick end, and we all got dressed.
The drive back to my house was so eerily quiet, that my mother
even commented at one point, asking us if anything was wrong.
"We're just tired, mom, from all the playing in the pool.
The three of us then exchanged glances -- all our faces were filled
with intense guilt and utter confusion.
After arriving home and eating dinner in complete silence, we
watched TV with my parents in the living room--the "six Million Dollar Man', to
be precise.
I remember feeling bad for Jason because of a rash he had
developed on the inside of his thigh, probably from his extra tight bathing
suit.
It had irritated him so much, that Robin and I had clearly heard
him cry from the bathroom as my mother applied A and D ointment to his rash.
Robin had laughed when hearing Jason cry, which really pissed
me off quite a bit.
All of this was making me feel extra guilty for playing along with
Robin's `game' in coercing our little cousin to do something he obviously
hadn't wanted to do.
Not once did any of us bring up what happened earlier in the day,
and the more I thought about it, the more I was feeling disgusted and guilty by
the whole episode. I can only assume that Robin and Jason were both
experiencing the same emotions.
When it was time for bed, I lay in my sleeping bag on my bedroom
floor, while Robin laid on my bed and Jason on my brother's bed. At the time,
my brother was on a cross county trip to San Francisco.
Again, we didn't talk at all about what had happened earlier in
the day, and simply turned out the lights to go to sleep.
I remember finding it hard to fall asleep that night, constantly
seeing the events of the day projected like a film on the inside of my closed
eyelids. I especially seemed to focus on the image of my cousin Jason kneeling
on the floor sucking Robin's cock.
The feelings of disgust and shame that had plagued me earlier, had
starting to dissolve and lose their power over my immature conscience. I was
soon seeing that image of my Jason sucking Robin through a clear and
non-judge-mental point of view.
And I quickly started getting hard.
As I became hornier and hornier, I began to clearly picture many
details of our nasty adventure with a clear focus
--the moment when Robin had thrust forward shoving his cock in my
mouth
--the way my cousin Robin had sucked Jason under the water...
--how I had watched through the door with excitement, as my cousin
Jason played with himself...
--those magical images of Jason on the floor sucking Robin's cock,
while his own erection curved up in the air from between his legs.
My cock was aching to orgasm, but I dare not jerk off and risk
drawing the attention of either of my cousins.
I fell asleep with an uncontrollable erection.
The next morning, we ate breakfast, still not speaking to each
other.
At one point my mom took Jason into the bathroom and put more A
& D ointment on his inner thigh.
He didn't cry this time, as it appeared that the A & D had
done a lot of healing through the night.
My mom planned to go out food shopping but decided that Jason
should probably stay at home to prevent further chaffing of his inner thigh.
Robin enthusiastically offered to stay with Jason, but my mother,
who knew that Robin would often be mean to Jay, asked me to stay with him
instead.
As soon as they left, I sat on my bed while Jason sat across from
me on my brother's bed.
I decided to break the silence.
"Hey cuz, I hope you're not mad about
yesterday."
"I'm not mad at you, Victor. I'm mad at Robin."
"I get it, but we were all playing around, and it wasn't all that
bad, was it?"
For some reason, in that moment, looking at his innocent
expression as he pondered the question--watching his tiny body sitting crossed
legged in his baggy pjs and with the smell of A & D ointment leaving his
groin--my little cousin looked very young, very innocent, and very vulnerable.
And his vulnerability was starting to get me aroused.
It was more a loving, empathic emotion of my wanting to take care
of my little cousin rather than a feeling of wanting to take advantage of him.
"No, I guess it wasn't that bad." He finally said.
And that was all I needed for my cock to start stirring.
I am not sure where I got the courage to ask, but I desperately
wanted to play with my cousin... alone.
Two's company...
"Do you want to blow each other?"
My voice had actually cracked while asking him.
"Not really."
I felt devastated. More embarrassed that I had put myself out
there and that he had rejected me, than the fact that he just didn't want to do
it.
For I moment--a small moment--I wanted to order him to his knees and
force him to blow me. But the thought quickly left me.
"Come on, you know it feels good."
"I know, but...but I...I don't want to."
I really, really wanted to continue the sexual exploration that
had started the day before.
I didn't know what else I could say to convince him, but when the
image of him playing with his erection in the bathroom popped into my thoughts,
my desire shot off into space.
I then remembered his curved-up erection while kneeling before my
cousin as he sucked his cock.
The images of his erection were filling me with a rabid lust that
wanted to explode.
And then it just left my lips...
"Can I blow you?"
He said nothing.
I was beginning to feel such an uncontrolled, youthful passion,
that I became desperate as more blood surged into my groin.
"You don't have to do it back to me."
My cousin didn't answer but looked down at his groin instead.
"I know that you're still in pain, and... and doctors say that a
blow job makes pain go away."
Yeah, I had gotten desperate alright.
My sole purpose at that very moment was to experience what happen
in the pool with Robin, only without the water in mouth and instead with my
younger cousin's nicer cock.
I wanted to stick Jason in my mouth. I wanted to explore the
desire of giving someone a blow job, I wanted a one-to-one
intimate experience--not that I really understood that at the time.
But would my cousin Jason budge?
"Please Jason, I'll make it feel better than when Robin did it in
the pool."
He still looked down without saying anything.
I was now rock hard as I continued groveling.
"Please, let me do it to you, Jason, please."
He slowly looked up at me with a sinister smile on his face. It
seemed as if he was enjoying the fact that I was begging him.
Perhaps it was the dramatic emotional shift of going from having
no control over the whims of his older cousin, to being the one in charge.
Jason was now the one with the power.
He was the one in control, able to choose whether to agree to his
cousin's desire or reject it. Well, at least this was the case with the cousin sitting
across from him now. I had the distinct feeling that had it been Robin who
stayed behind instead of me, Jason would be on his knees at this very moment
with Robin's cock deep in his mouth.
But Jason knew that I was not like Robin.
I was the kinder cousin.
He had once confided in me that I was his favorite between Robin
and me, mostly because Robin treated him so badly, so often.
He smiled at me kindly, warmly.
"Ok, you could do it to me."
"Great," I said, getting off the bed with my erection tenting up
my PJs.
He pointed at it and started giggling like a little girl.
I had to admit, it did look funny.
I started to laugh as well, then jumped up and down a couple of
times as my cock bounce around in my PJs.
His laugh and smile faded quickly as he watched my bouncing cock,
and it was only later, when looking back on that moment, that I realized it
wasn't because the moment had lost its humor, but instead because he had become
excited by looking at my erection.
"Ok, Jay, lay down on the bed."
He quickly followed my instruction, turning his body and leaning
back till he was lying flat. He then began to shimmy his body up, his hips
moving back and forth in a purely adorable fashion, until his head was on the
pillow.
He took the pillow, folded in half and but it back under his head,
which was now propped up--he obviously wanted to see everything I was about to
do to him. Truth be told, I was not doing this to please my cousin--that was
just a nice by-product. I was doing this to please myself, anticipating each
moment of this unfolding adventure.
I stepped to the foot of the bed.
As I absorbed the view of my cute tiny cousin laying before me,
our eyes locked. He looked excited. He was wearing such a lovely smile and his
beautiful bright eyes beamed a look of girlish anticipation.
"Ok, now spread your legs."
Before I had even finished the sentence, his legs shot apart as if
a tightly wound spring had suddenly snapped.
There was something in his mannerism that reminded me of a little
boy who was quickly tearing opening a huge birthday gift--he looked ridiculously
excited.
He knew he was safe with me.
I was being kind. I was not trying to trick him into anything as
Robin had done the day before. On the contrary, I had begged him to let me do
exactly what he had been forced to do against his will.
I then, of course, remembered how it looked as if Jason had
enjoyed blowing Robin towards the end.
And as if he had read my mind, his eyes dropped to the tent in my
PJs.
I ignored his gazing at my groin and got onto the bed between his
feet.
I inched up with my knees till I was kneeling between his inner
thighs.
Before I could do anything, he grabbed the band of his PJs and
pulled them down at such a blurry speed that it took me a moment to register
his very hard erection.
The smell of A & D ointment wafted up into my nose.
I remember liking the smell for some reason, perhaps because the
moment was so sexually charged or perhaps that the smell was something I
remembered myself form childhood. But one thing I can say is this, for the next
4 decades any time I smelled of A & D ointment it would pleasantly bring me
back to this very experience unfolding before me--in full color smell-a-vision.
There before me was my little cousin's hairless boy groin. It
looked amazing and so inviting.
While I may have been curious about playing with a girl's body, I
had never felt the way I did as I did in that moment of another boys privates--it was always a girl's naked body that I
pictured whenever I masturbated.
The day before, I had looked at Jason's dick when he was kneeling
on the floor, but only found it interesting when Jason had become hard as he
sucked Robin off.
Now his erection was only a couple of feet below me and I was about
to begin playing with it at my own pace--intimately. It was just the two us now,
alone. And I loved that fact.
I felt like some wild carnivorous animal who was about to tear
apart his helpless prey. But the prey had turned the tables, luring me into
pleasing him simply by exposing his sexual area to my eyes.
"Do you mind if I take off your PJs?"
For some reason, I wanted to look at his skinny, girlie legs. I
suppose it was that part of me that liked girls, which made we want to see and
feel them.
He simply nodded, his bright eyes beaming from his escalating
anticipation.
He put his feet back together as I pulled his PJs down.
I stepped back off the bed and slipped his PJs off his small,
smooth feet and dropped them to the floor.
I stood up at the foot of the bed looking down at his hairless
legs and groin. My eyes traced from his adorable feet and ankles up to his thin
calves, following his legs up to his tiny thighs till my eyes landed finally on
his amazing erection. It was actually a nice size--at
two years younger than me, it was only a little smaller than mine.
I jumped back on the bed but stayed at the base with my knees by
his feet.
I reached forward putting my hands on his calves.
His body jerked slightly from my touch.
I looked up at his face, but his eyes were closed.
I slowly rubbed my hands up his legs, feeling his bony knees and
finally rested them on his thighs--I clearly remember my hands almost wrapping
around his thighs, though that's probably some erotic memory glitch.
A million goose bumps flooded Jason's thighs as a barely
detectable moan escaped his throat--he was really loving the feel of my hands
touching him.
I had never felt any part of a girl's body before, let alone
another boy. This was my first time touching someone else intimately, and
though I knew (or wrongly assumed back then) that this was unacceptable
behavior and totally against my parent's religious teachings, I also remembered
not caring one damn bit in that moment.
I was quickly falling in love with the idea of sensually touching
my cousin.
Since this was my first time feeling someone's body intimately, I
could only assume that it had to also be the first time my little cousin was
being touched intimately.
I spread his thighs apart and inched up till I was sitting on my
haunches in front of his beautiful erection.
It was beautiful. And I didn't feel any guilt about
thinking so.
I could now clearly see the chaffing on the inside of his left thigh,
and I immediately felt bad for him, especially in light of
what had happened yesterday
I reached forward and touched the frenulum of his cock.
His body jerked again but he remained silent.
I moved both my hands up his thighs till I gripped his little
hips.
His body shuddered involuntarily, yet his eyes remained closed.
I bent forward till my face was a few inches over his cock and
looked at all the details carefully.
I was in awe of the fact that I was so close to the very body part
that I cherished most on my own body. Yet this someone else's cock before my
eyes and I had never been so close to anyone else's before, not even my own.
I looked at the ridges of his frenulum where his foreskin had been
removed nine years earlier when he was a baby. It was less raised than my own,
but I knew that his would feel just as good as mine did when
ever I rubbed it with my saliva.
Only I was about to use my tongue.
I reached forward and kissed it tenderly.
Again, the slight shudder throughout his entire body.
I started licking the area up and down like a lollypop.
He gasped, which was followed by an adorable high-pitched moan of
absolute delight.
I couldn't stand it anymore.
I reached up with my hand and grabbed the base of his erection,
then bent his cock down a little.
I was now looking down his cock as it curved back to meet his
hairless body.
I opened my mouth and moved down, putting his cock head in my
mouth.
Another moan from my cousin, followed by an involuntary moan from
me.
I went down a little bit, noticing how the texture of tight skin
felt a little rubbery on my tongue and lips.
I absolutely loved it!
I placed my hand back on his hip, gripping them both passionately.
I started to go up and down slowly, still finding it hard to
believe that I was sucking my little cousin's rock-hard cock.
His moaning was now very low in volume, but almost constant.
Though my intention was to take pleasure from this experience, I
found myself absolutely loving the fact that I was making my younger cousin
feel so good. It made me feel like I was somehow repaying him for what had
happened yesterday. I was redeeming the inaction of my not having stood up to
Robin, by pleasing Jason so thoroughly now. And I was asking for absolutely
nothing in return.
I looked up at Jason and saw that he was looking straight into my
eyes with what I can only describe as a loving gratitude. And in that moment,
his hands went down over mine, which still gripped his tiny hips.
I will never forget what happened next.
Jason spread out the fingers of both his hands and maneuvered them
through my own so that our fingers became interlocked.
I had held a girl's hand once in 5th grade and I remembered getting very excited, very hard, very
quickly. But this was different. With our fingers interlocked--his fingertips
rubbing the top of my hands--it was beautifully tender and completely loving.
There was something so intimate and genuine in this simple act, that I felt a
charge of tingling energy permeate my gut.
I had obviously never experienced anything close to sexual contact
with anyone before and that was exactly what we were both experiencing at that
moment with each other--we were having a form of sex.
I started rubbing my finger on the tops of his hands, returning
the loving gesture my cousin was conveying to me.
His eyes brightened with joy from my action, but I then closed my
eyes and focused my attention to the continuing act of pleasing my cousin as
well as pleasing my own mouth.
I was exploring the taste and texture of someone else's cock for
the very first time--licking and sucking my way through a brand-new adventure,
and I never wanted it to end.
But I did stop and unclenched our hands before kneeled back up.
He looked at me with a bit of alarm.
"Is it ok if I take my PJs off?
His little boy smile returned, and he nodded quickly.
I stood up off the bed, stripping down to my birthday suite.
His eyes fell to my raging harden and they stayed there for a few
seconds before he sat up on the bed.
For a moment there I had though he was going to ask if he could
blow me, but instead he quickly unbuttoned his PJ shirt and threw it down to
the floor.
We were both now totally naked in front of each other and we
obviously felt beyond comfortable about this fact.
He leaned back on the bed again, anticipating more pleasure from
the mouth and hands of his older cousin.
I wanted nothing more than to comply.
I looked down at his small naked and beautiful frame.
I was completely enamored of my cousin's body.
For a split second I felt like laying onto of him in an embrace
and even maybe kissing him on the lips, but the idea of kissing another boy
suddenly grossed me out.
Luckily, glancing back down at his beautiful cock served as a
vaccine, which quickly cured me of any negative thoughts.
Then, an idea suddenly occurred to me.
"Put your legs together, Jay."
He did as I asked.
"Is it ok if I rub my dick on your legs while I suck you?"
His eyes looked back and forth before he quickly nodded at me,
smiling.
I got back on the foot of the bed with my knees straddling his
outer ankles.
I leaned forward, laying on top of his legs, my erection landing
between his knees. My head came down too high and hovered above his belly.
Before moving down to access his erection with my mouth, I reached
forward with my lips and kissed his pale, smooth stomach.
He moaned in delight.
I then moved my body down, rubbing against his legs with my body
and my own erection, till my groin rested between his inner ankles.
I lifted my calves in the air behind me so that my legs were no
longer hanging off the edge of the bed
I clearly remember Jason rubbing his foot on my ass and balls,
which felt really great--another expression of intimacy.
I leaned in, grabbed his cock by the base and shoved into my wanting
mouth.
He moaned again.
As I went up and down, swirling my tongue all over the place, I
was also trying to hump his ankles, but it wasn't quite working. So, I had
another idea.
"Hey, can you move your knees out a bit and let me rub myself on
the inside of your feet."
He looked confused, so I took the initiative and positioned his
feet so that the soles are up against each other, and his boney knees were
spread out to the sides.
He watched this intently, looking at my cock with a clear hunger
in his eyes. I remember thinking to myself at that moment that I wasn't going
ask or even suggest that he blow me as well--it would have to come from him if
he so desired.
I rested my cock between his feet as I laid back down.
After putting his cock in my mouth, I gripped his thighs with my
hands. A moment later, I felt his own hands come back down over mine. We
quickly interlocked our fingers in our wonderful expression of intimacy, and I
continued making love to his beautiful, stiff cock.
After several minute of really enjoying myself and bringing such
obviously pleasure to my little cousin, he began to methodically trust his hips
up and down, essentially fucking my mouth.
At one point I gagged when he trusted up as I went down, which
made him stop suddenly.
"I'm...I'm really sorry, Victor."
I came off his cock, watching his saliva covered work of art slap
back onto his stomach.
I smiled kindly at him, saliva dripping from my mouth.
"Hey, it's totally cool. I kind of liked it."
"Really?"
"Yeah. I love blowing you, Jason. I really do. It really feels
good in my mouth."
"So...it's ok if I keep doing that?"
"If you like it better than me going up and down on you, then just
hold my head where you want and keep shoving it in and out of my mouth."
"Really?"
It sounded like I had given him permission to take the controls of
a real expensive battery-operated toy.
"Yes, Jason. After what happened yesterday, I want you to feel
really good!"
"All of this feels really good Jason, thank you. You are such a
great cousin."
I suddenly felt a deep love for my little cousin. I was certainly
going above and beyond any redemption for what occurred the day before, and of
course I was really enjoying all that was happening in that moment--way beyond
anything else that I had ever down before.
I disengaged our interlocked fingers, grabbed his hands, and put
them on the sides of my head.
I opened my mouth and took his cock head inside then stayed there.
He took the cue and began humping my face with his trusting hips.
My little nine-year cousin was fucking my
face. I was in ecstasy.
I remember thinking how Robin had treated Jason like a slave, on
his knees pleasuring him. Now, I felt like a bit of a slave myself as my master
held my head in a tighter and tighter grip, using it as he saw fit to bring
himself pleasure.
I began humping his feet, my cock rubbing against his soft soles.
I quickly shot up, and brought my face to his feet, then looked up
at him.
"I'm gonna wet your feet so it feels
better for me, ok?"
He nodded, probably thinking I was going to get water or cream or
something.
Instead, I leaned down with my tongue outstretched and began
lathering his soles with saliva.
He moaned out loud, shuddering as he did.
This was certainly something I never imagined doing to anyone, but
for some reason it was making me feel really hot to be licking my cousin's tiny
feet.
His soles were amply wet for what I intended, but I couldn't stop,
for some reason. When I went down and started sucking his toes, he yelped,
which was soon followed by him retracting his feet and giggling.
"That tickles!"
"Ok, I'll stop."
I laid back down and his hands gripped my head as I took his cock
head back in my mouth.
I began humping the soles of his feet and I clearly remember that
after about a minute that I wasn't going to be able to hold it for much
longer--my erection was racing fast toward an orgasm.
As he started to hump my mouth harder and faster, I had to stop
rubbing myself on his feet because I had arrived at that edge, and I wanted it
this experience to last. I also wanted to bring my cousin to orgasm before I
did.
I remember wondering that, considering his spastic attempts at
masturbation the day before, if this would be his first orgasm.
I slowly began humping his feet again, remaining close but not
going over the edge.
A minute later, his hands went from the side of my head to the
back as he began pushing down while trusting up and down furiously.
He started to moan in such a sexy and uncontrollable fashion as
his cock got even harder than it had been.
I knew what was happening because my own cock always got harder right
before an orgasm.
As his body began shuddering to the new sensations he was
experiencing, his toes started curing and uncurling on my balls and his soles
started contracting and expanding, which was just enough to push my cock over
the edge.
I moaned in absolute pleasure, humping his feet intensely as we
both experienced our duel dry orgasms.
He pressed my head down hard during his rapture, holding it down
as I gagged. Had I not been in the middle of my own ecstasy, it may have been a
bit too much for me, but I absolutely loved it.
The pulsing of his cock through each contraction was an amazing
sensation in my mouth and I just couldn't believe that another boy was having
an orgasm inside my face.
After a few moments, our orgasms slowed to an end, and I suddenly
started feeling confused and guilty, and even a bit grossed out.
My cousin, on the other hand, was wearing a ridiculous expression
of delight on his face as he smiled down at me.
His looked quickly began evaporating my confusion and guilt--I
didn't want this amazing experience to end on a bad not, especially because of
what had happed the day before. I wanted him to love what I had done and
remember it as a great experience.
As I got off his body, I stood up and looked down at his wet and
still very hard cock. I suddenly knew in that moment, that in my heart, I
wanted to do what I had just done to Jason, and again, and again, and again.
Jason just laid there totally still.
He looked at me with such a loving expression of joy, that it made
me giggle.
"I guess you enjoyed that, huh?"
"I never felt anything like that before. What happened to me
penis?"
"That was an orgasm, Jay. When you play with yourself long enough,
that's what happens at the end."
"But how do I play with myself so that I could make that happen
again?"
He looked down at my still hard cock, asking me with his eyes to
teach him to jerk off properly.
I put my hand on my erection and started to slowly jerk off.
I looked at his expression and loved what I was seeing.
He was mesmerized.
"It feels really good if you use body lotion or if you spit in
your hand when you do it."
With each stroke, my cousin was getting more and more excited.
He reached down and started to mimic me.
Though both of our cocks were still quite sensitive, the
instructor and student continued through the lesson.
At one point, as Jason stared intently at my cock, he licked his
lips.
I couldn't help myself. I stepped around the bed and moved closer to
his upper torso.
"Now you could get a closer look."
He looked up at me with an expression that felt to me as if he was
becoming powerless over some desire.
I was hoping that it was the very desire I thought it might be.
We both kept going up and down with our hands on our cocks, by
cousin watching everything I was doing intently.
I inched a bit closer to his head.
He looked up at me for a moment, then back down at my cock.
After watching him the day before apparently enjoy the act of
sucking my cousin, I knew what he wanted to do. But it almost looked like he
was somehow embarrassed or afraid to give in to his desire.
I said nothing, but kept giving him a show, slowly pulling up and
down on my cock, which was not about to get small again--I was once hornier as
hell. By the hardness of my cousin, and the way he was looking at my cock in
such a wanting fashion, I knew he was as excited as I was.
He turned his body sideways to face me, and in so doing, his face
was now a foot away from erection.
I inched forward a bit more till my shins were up against the bed
and let go of my cock.
It was now pointing directly at his mouth about eight inches away.
He looked up at me again, then back down at my hard cock.
No words were exchanged, as he leaned in closer, his face now only
inches away from the object of his desire.
I carefully leaned in a bit and watched with delight as he opened
his mouth and put his lips around my hard cock.
The slippery smooth and warm sensation of his mouth and tongue
were utterly intoxicating.
But his position was awkward for both up as he began to enjoy
sucking on me.
"Sit on the edge of the bed, Jay."
He quickly swung his legs over the side and sat up on the edge of
the bed.
He then put this hands on my hips and
took me back into his mouth.
I raised my hands to his and interlocked my fingers.
He moaned.
While I was thoroughly enjoying this new sensation of having someone's
mouth going up and down on my cock, I also want to let him do everything at his
own pace, without an interference from me.
Oh, I wanted to do more...I wanted to grip his head, take command of
his mouth, and fuck it hard and fast, but I wasn't
about to interrupt his own sexual exploration. And besides, that was not my
style.
His warm mouth and tongue felt so incredible, that I could feel my
cock getting closer to that magical moment.
But then I heard the front door of the house open.
Jason and I jumped to garb our respective pjs, which were strewn
across the floor, and got dressed as fast as humanly possible.
I instantly grabbed my Star Trek dolls off my night table and
jumped on to the bed with Jason, handing him captain Kirk.
"Pretend we're playing."
I raised the Klingon doll up, and pretended he was battling with
Kirk.
Robin burst into my room as if he thought he might catch us doing
something.
After a moment he laughed.
"You're playing with dolls? You guys are such pansies."
Jason and I looked at each other for a moment then burst out
laughing. We both new that we were laughing at fact that we had just played
with each other's cocks while Robin and mom were shopping, and that Robin was
none the wiser.
"What's so funny?"
I turned to Robin with a sarcastic look on my face.
"Just that you think you're so cool and macho and just last week
we both played with these very same dolls."
Robin grimaced before leaving the room.
I turned to Jason and smiled.
"This is our little secret, OK?"
He smiled and nodded his head with glee.
"And I really hope we get to do it again."
He nodded with such an excited and joyous smile, that I had to
reach over and hold his hand.
We rubbed each other's fingers with the same level of intimacy
that we had done earlier, smiling warmly at each other for a few seconds.
I then got up and headed to the kitchen after my mother had asked
me to help put away the groceries.
Jason and I didn't spend any more time alone for the rest of that
week, as Robin was with us the whole time. Then my aunt and uncle--Robin's
parents--came to pick up Robin and Jason the bring
Jason to their house for the rest of his stay.
It would be a whole year before I would see Jason again alone. Our
next vacation to Miami was via airplane and it coincided with Robin's vacation
to California.
I only slept over Jason's for one night that summer, but it was a
long and sleepless night, as we enjoyed each other's cocks, orgasm after
orgasm.
It was also that night that Jason had told me how Robin had
continually made him suck him off during the last week of his vacation with us.
That magical summer day in my room was where I had fallen in love
with the act of sucking someone else's cock. And for years and even decades
after, Jason and I kept enjoying the magical intimacy and oral exploration that
we had initiated that one summer back in 1974. Only as we both matured through
puberty, we also soon discovered the wonderful taste and texture of cumming down each other's throats.