Date: Wed, 10 Dec 2003 01:04:29 EST
From: Heywealldoit@aol.com
Subject: Exploring Grounds 2

What you are about to read are true events from my past.  They involve me
and my father.  What you wish to think about these events is solely up to
you, as in my opinion, what happened was educational and appreciated.  All
rules apply, if you do not wish to read the contents of this autobiography,
please turn away, although anything you will read here is not subject to
violations by law or nature.  I am proud to write an account of how I
became sexually responsible in life, due to my dad.  He is gone now, but
remembered with great kindness and affection.  I do not write these
accounts to make anyone horny or fanatical about family sexuality.  Just
enjoy what I have to this day think as my 'Exploring Grounds' of life.

In my first venture of putting in writing certain events when I was twelve,
I described in as much detail as I thought necessary how my dad taught me
about jacking off.  Here, it is mostly about my own exploring with myself,
and me being able to express myself...

For several days following my late afternoon of learning about masturbation
and my dad allowing me to watch him do it, it was pretty much all that was
on my mind.  I became more aware of my penis and when it was hard and that
it was virtually asking for attention.  I do not recall that I'd spent much
time at all thinking about what I saw my dad do, though it was what
triggered my sexual awareness.  Days came and went, and I spent quite a bit
of time alone, touching and playing with my penis every time it got hard.
I believe what crossed my mind was that I wanted to do what dad did, and so
I tried to stroke myself as much as possible, yet I could not get myself to
do the sperm thing.
	Also, amid my surroundings, I started noticing and picking up on
other peoples' talk.  Talk about liking girls, hearing the word 'horny,'
sensing the interest boys a few years older then me had toward girls.  It
was like a landslide of information and interest and...fun dirtiness to
hear these things.  I'd get home from playing outside and sit in my room
and articulate what I could remember and try to beat off.  This went on for
several days, until about three weeks later.
	I think, with all the new things on my mind, the meaning of
horniness hit me like a truck.  I was so determined to do the sperm thing
that I refused to stop until I did.  And it happened.  Without real memory
of how long I'd laid on my bed and jacked off, I finally felt that first
time sensation, that first in a lifetime-never feel again rush of feeling
something take over my body.  My spasms went from head to toe as I stared
at my four or so inch hard on flare in my hand, feeling the unexpected
excitement, thinking that I had to pee and couldn't hold it long enough to
get to the toilet, and then being gripped by a large, invisible hand in my
gut as I saw sperm spurt out of me.  It was incredible.  I kept stroking,
watching it come all over my tummy, until nature relaxed my body's
intentions and I just lay there pulsing, smiling.  My little penis was
jumping on its own, and I felt the pleasure in calming down from the spasms
of the rest of my body, mostly in my chest.
	After laying there for a few minutes, getting orientated, I was
overjoyed with such a wonderful feeling, a feeling to this day doesn't have
words to really express.  Then it struck me.  My dad was home.  I was nude
through this except having socks on, and I jumped off my bed, opening my
bedroom door to find dad.  There I was, twelve years old, with my first
load of cum all over the front of me, running through the house.  I started
calling, "Dad!" as I first checked out the upper living room, then his
bedroom.  "Dad!"
	From a distance, I heard him say, "What, Rick?  I'm downstairs."
	Good, I'd thought, he's not out in the garage doing something to
the station wagon.  I trampled my way through the house and down the
stairs, and when I got to the bottom dad was just coming out of his tool
room.  When he saw me quite naked, he froze in his tracks, and I stopped at
the bottom of the stairs too.
	As he said these words, he was sort of laughing... "What's up?"
	"I did it dad!"  I was ecstatic with joy, taking a few steps toward
him and pushing out my wet torso.  "Look!"
	He walked up to me, knelt, and studied me.  There was a smirk on
his face, and he chuckled.
	"Dad, I did it!"  I probably had the biggest smile on my face.
	Grinning, he stood back up, towering over me.  To this day, I know
he found that moment amusing.  I think he tried not to laugh out loud, and
he didn't, but remembering his face, I think he wanted to.  "Good for you,"
He said, looking down at me.  He just kept looking at me.
	"What?"  I asked.
	Dad finally shook his head, and knelt back down.  He looked right
at my crotch, and I was still hard, my penis pointing up, lean and bright
pink.  "Rick, how long have you been stroking?"
	With all my enjoyment, and the fun I'd had, I was happy to say, "I
don't know, I just wanted to do it, dad."
	He put two fingers to my tight, almost non visible ball sac and
said, "You're gonna feel sore, son.  Look at how red your penis is."
	I looked down.  I could feel a pulsing, but it didn't feel sore.  I
didn't understand.
	"Well, how'd it feel then?"
	"It felt like I had to pee really bad, but when I saw the sperm, I
wasn't afraid I was peeing," I explained.  I was just a happy young boy.
	"Well good, because you're probably going to be doing a lot of it,"
He chuckled, standing to his full height, "but not any time soon.  Come on,
you need take a warm bath."  One thing I had hated when I was a kid was
being told to take a bath.  I started to protest and dad knew what all my
facial expressions were.  "Rick, you have to, you made your little pecker
sore there.  If you don't it'll feel worse later on."
	He took me to the upstairs bathroom, and I stood there as he got
the tub going with warm water.  Dad then reached for a hand towel and
positioned me in front of him and he started wiping down my chest.  "You
cum will start to dry very quickly, Rick.  You may want to wipe it off soon
after you shoot or you'll feeling drying tight to your skin."
	"I wanted you to see what I did."
	Chuckling, he nodded, "I see it, Rick.  Did you jack off without
using oil?"  He finished wiping my torso down.
	"Um, yeah."  I realized then that dad was wearing a muscle shirt,
and had light gray colored sweats on.  His own cock was tenting in his lap.
"Look at you dad."  I reached down and lightly touched the head of his lap
tent.
	"I know.  It's because when some things are talked about it's easy
to get excited.  Now listen, get in the tub and soak for a bit.  And after
this, remember to use oil, or Vaseline.  I'll put some in your room.  You
should have told me you were trying to make yourself cum for the first
time, I'd have given oil to you."
	I took my socks off and stepped into the very warm water.  It felt
great, and I slowly sat down.  Dad let if fill half way before turning the
flow off.  "Am I really gonna feel very sore?" I asked.
	Dad chuckled.  "You look really red there, Rick.  Just soak a bit."
He left me in the bathroom, and I stayed in the tub until the water started
feeling cool, and got out.  I couldn't help thinking how cool it was what I
did.
	As I dried off I learned what dad was telling me, because when the
towel touched my penis, it felt like a rubbing pain.  And I was still hard.
Dad must have heard me stirring, because he appeared.  "How are you doing?"
	"I'm a little sore dad."
	Laughing, he said, "You don't have to dress if cloth feels rough.
Just hang around the house."
	"Dad, why won't it go down?"
	"You're just too excited, that's all.  Watch some TV or read a
book.  When you're not thinking about this, it'll go soft.  See, mine did."
I looked at his crotch and there wasn't a tent.
	"Did you..."
	He shook his head, "No, you don't always have to jack off when you
get a hard on, son.  It can go down without jacking off."
	"Oh.  Okay."  It seemed like I was learning something every minute.

	Later that evening, I was still naked, except I did put my socks
back on.  I was mostly in my room reading, but had moved to the living
room, where dad was in his robe and watching Shogun.  At that age, my
attention span for an epic like that wasn't appealing to me, yet I laid
down on the floor between the TV and the coffee table and was half
watching, have day dreaming about who knows what.
	In all my fidgeting on the floor, my head ended up under the coffee
table.  My dad was sitting on the couch with his legs crossed over the top
of the table, and my eyes found his hairy balls dangling loosely between
his legs.  I didn't know that I could do this and I didn't know that I
couldn't do this, but I reached up and felt them.  I also felt my dad just
a bit.
	"What are you doing down there?"  I heard him ask.
	It's funny.  I didn't stop.  The hair and wrinkliness of his ball
sack got my attention.  "Rick?"
	"I'm just checking them out, dad," I answered.
	"You should ask to do something like that first."  He told me.  He
didn't sound stern or angry, not even mellow or happy.  Perhaps he was too
into watching the movie.  I stayed there for a couple minutes playing with
his ball sack, and his legs became more relaxed.  "You need to stop now,
Rick."
	"Why?  Is it hurting?"
	"No, but it is making me hard.  Being touched does that to guys."
	"It does?"  I asked, moving from under the table to sit up.  When I
turned around, I saw his penis sticking out from between the folds of his
robe.  He made no move to tuck it away, and already it seemed, if I
remember totally, that it was going soft.
	"Are you going to watch the movie?"  Dad asked.  I shook my head.
"Then find something to do, I'm trying to watch it."
	"Okay."  I got up and started heading to my room, but turned at the
corner and asked dad, "Are you going to masturbate?"
	He didn't respond quickly, but he finally said, "Maybe later,"
without taking his eyes from the TV.
	"Can I watch?"
	"If you let me watch the movie, yes," He stated, not harshly, but
warningly, like I'd better leave him alone for the moment.
	It didn't matter, his reply made me happy.  I didn't know if he'd
meant it or not, because parents can sometimes say things a kid wants to
hear to remedy a situation quickly.  I went to my room, and since most of
my stuff was at my moms, I really didn't have much to do except read or go
downstairs and find something to watch on that TV, but I opted to read.
	I hopped on my bed and looked at my penis.  Just doing that made it
hard.  It didn't really hurt unless it was throbbing hard, so I hoped
reading would send it away, since dad told me not to touch it.

	With my mom, I always had to fight to be able to stay up really
late, but at dad's he didn't seem to be all that fussy about when I went to
bed, just so that I was ready to sleep when he turned in.  His working
mostly nights made him a night owl; just one of the many things I'd later
learn my mom didn't like about him.  Anyway, I was still reading when I
heard dad moving about the living room.  My room was just around the
corner, and I heard the static of the TV being turned off.
	His head popped through the door.  "It's after eleven Rick.  Are
you ready for bed?"
	"Not yet, dad.  Please?"
	"How does your penis feel?"
	"It doesn't hurt unless it's hard, dad, but I can't...you
know...control that."
	He chuckled, coming into my room and sitting beside me.  "Don't
ever think you can control it, son.  I'm 38 years old and I still can't.
Why don't you try getting to sleep."
	"Ahh dad, you said I could watch you do the jack off thing."  I
pouted.
	"Well what if I don't feel like doing it now, kiddo?"  He had a
nonchalant smile on his face.  I just looked down at my book over my leg.
Yes, it was again a pout.  "Rick, look at me."  I looked up into his eyes.
"Rick, guys don't jack off in front of each other.  I don't know how to
explain it, but they don't.  I let you watch me before to teach you about
it.  And you know...now that you started doing it yourself, you can do it
any time you want."  He smirked, "Well, as long as you don't make yourself
sore again."  I laughed, but I'm sure I was still pouting a bit.  "Besides,
son, when I jack off, I'm like you saw me downstairs.  Do you remember what
was on the TV?"
	I'd actually not really given that much thought at all until he
brought it up.  "Oh yeah."
	He seemed somewhat embarrassed as he tried to explain that.  "I uh,
well I..." I'm sure he was at a loss for explanations there, and that he
probably didn't want me to know about pornography at my age.  "I'll tell
you about that another time, okay?"  He finally said.
	He watched me for about a minute as I thought through whatever was
on my mind, and I said, "I thought it was fun watching you do the sperm
thing, dad."
	"I'm sure it was," he laughed softly, "you've just got a lot to
learn in the next couple years, my boy."  His hands covered his face and he
fell back.  In reflection, and knowing what I know now, I believe he was
wondering what to do about me and what he should tell me.  Yet after he
fell back, his robe was tented.
	It brought a smile to my face.  "You're hard again, dad."
	"I know!"  He said through his hands, his voice sounded deeper and
muffled.
	I grabbed my book and leaned over, dropping it to the floor,
crossed my legs, and asked him.  "Dad, can I hold it again?"
	He sat abruptly and said, "No."  He did this looking at me, looking
away, looking at me, looking away thing for several seconds, then he said,
"Okay, I'll let you watch me one more time, but only because I know I will
have to jack off anyway at this point."
	He got up and left swiftly.  He was only gone less then a minute,
but he returned with a small jar of Vaseline, opened his robe, and sat back
down.  "Is that the oil?"  I asked when I saw him remove the lid and stick
the fingers of his left hand in it.
	"Yes, well, this is Vaseline," He told me, and he rubbed it all
over his hard on before he laid on his back, much the same way as we were
the first time we were in the situation.  After a minute of his beginning
stroking, he looked around the bed and changed positions, his large body
jiggling the bed as he came to the side of me and put his shoulders against
the wall.  Dad gave me a curious once over look, as if he didn't know what
he was doing, and just started jacking off again.  He opened his legs,
knees in the air, and he did something he didn't do the other time.  He
grabbed his balls with his right hand as he stroked, feeling them.
	I didn't like my position where I was watching, so I jumped down
and between his legs.  He watched me do this and chuckled.  "I'm going to
make this quick, Rick."  I only nodded, and it seemed to amuse him, because
a quick laugh erupted from him, as if he couldn't believe what he was
doing.
	My penis was hurting because it was so hard, but it was in the back
of my mind more then bothering me.  I was excited to see dad do it again.
	In all of two minutes it was over.  He jacked off more quickly then
he had the first time, and when he was close, he said, "Okay Rick, I'm
almost there.  You remember what it felt like when you did it today?"  I
nodded eagerly.  "That's what I'm feeling."  His legs went straight and
crushed me between them, not painfully, but strongly, and his body tensed.
"Okay, here it comes!"  His breathing started in gasps, his eyes closed,
and I watched his sperm shoot from the head of his cock, the first hitting
his mid torso, the second and third hitting his hairy tummy, until he
sighed, his orgasm subsiding.
	I was ecstatic, loving seeing it.  It was great to me.  I don't
know how to explain the rush a 12 year old boy has at seeing such a thing.
It was...cool.  I felt his legs relax as he raised his knees again.
	"Whew!"  He said, his voice sounding deep and rumbling.  Looking at
himself, his messy chest, then looking at me, he sat up, keeping his left
hand away from us.  "Well?"
	"That's so cool, dad!"  Whatever was in my head at that time, I
can't really say now, but I reached into his lap and tried gripping his
pulsing erection.
	He jumped at that, pulling my hand away quickly with his right
hand.  "No, Rick, it's sensitive right now."  He started to get up and I
got out of the way of his swinging leg, allowing him to stand.  "Time for
bed now?"  He asked.
	I was in total agreement with anything he could have asked me at
that moment.  "Okay!"
	He grabbed his robe with his clean hand and let out a sigh, just
staring at me as I worked my way under the covers.  When I felt all tucked
in, he was still just staring at me, a sober look on his face.  "That was
fun, dad."  I told him.
	He nodded.  "Go to sleep now."
	"I will."
	As he left my room, I remember him shaking his head with amusement,
at least I think it was amusement.  He turned my light out, and I can still
see him standing in the doorway, the light from the hallway behind him.
"Night dad."
	"Night, son."
	Not knowing how tired I was, I was asleep even before a moment
later when he turned the hall light off.  I just woke up the next morning
and started another day...