Date: Fri, 29 Jan 2010 09:21:04 -0500
From: J K <imawriter123@gmail.com>
Subject: Funny Things Happen part 2

"Funny things happen"  Part 2
Comments welcome at : imawriter123@gmail.com

At that point I suddenly (not surprisingly) lost my appetite for food, and
just sat staring at her, with a smile on my face as she was babbling away
about one thing after another, except that I didn't hear a thing she was
saying. I was just sitting there in a complete daze, and then again the
room started to spin, and before my head fell down to the table again, I
blinked my eyes twice, and said to her that I needed to leave and go home,
and we would talk in the morning and figure out how it was that we were
going to break this to our parents.

As I got up from the table to leave, she called to me,

	"David, you promise you really are going to stay with me and not
run away? Remember this is your baby too."

My head spun around, because I went from the state of a daze to that of
anger – which is not like me.  I looked back at her with daggers in my
eyes and I'm sure that she saw them, and I said to her,

	"Christine, yes I'm going to stay with you, yes this is my baby
too.  But I'll tell you why I'm going to do it. I'm doing it because that's
who I am, that's the type of person that I am.  I DO NOT LIE, I DO NOT
CHEAT.  I AM A MAN OF MY WORD. I am going to stay because that is what this
child deserves, it deserves to have a father and a mother, and a correct
family.  And he or she will get every ounce of my love and my care, all
that I have.  BUT I am also going to teach our child how NOT to act, and
how NOT to be like his mother who LIED just to get something SHE wanted.
Yes that's right Christine, you did pick someone who would be loving and
caring to his child even if he was fooled into it.  But don't think for ONE
MINUTE, that this is for you.  Yes I care for you, and I think that
somewhere underneath all of your bullshit, you are a good person, but it is
going to be EXTREMELY difficult for me to trust you going further.  I no
longer have that for you.  Do you understand that and why?"

She just sat there staring at me with a look of shock on her face.  I guess
she finally got it – at least my real feelings in this now.  She just
kept staring at me, and finally nodded her head that she understood.

And with that, I turned and walked out to my car, got in and slammed the
door shut, and then finally just broke down and dropped my head to the
steering wheel, and started weeping.  I had no idea what I was going to do
now, how was I going to college? How was I going to tell my parents? What
did my life turn into?  I really didn't know, but I realize one thing.  I
had less than 7 months to figure it all out.

I finally composed myself, turned on the car and drove off, I had no idea
where I was going, just an aimless drive out to the middle of no-where and
figure out what the hell to do.  Well really there was no question there, I
was going to have a baby, I was certain that I was going to have to get
married – but what kind of a marriage was this going to be?  I did not
love the woman I would be married to, it would be a complete sham, but how
do you tell that to your parents, "Hi mom, dad, how was your night?  Oh
good, by the way Christine is pregnant with my child and we're going to get
married."  Oh lord this was going to be a massive mess.  But all that said
it somehow had to be done, but done correctly.

I went home that night, and tried to sleep, but twisted and turned, and
every time I closed my eyes I had nightmares running through my head with
so many disaster scenarios that sleep just became impossible, Christine and
I were going to have to make this work one way or another, and it's going
to be done right.  If I am going to have this child I was going to the best
that I could to make sure that had the best childhood and care that I could
possibly give.

The following morning, Christine and I got together and tried to figure out
how to break the news to our parents, and we decided that it would be best
to do it as a `group' thing. So we got everyone together for dinner , and
Christine started off,

	"The reason David and I wanted to have everyone together, was
because we have 2 very special announcements that we would like to make,
Davd?"

	"Well, to put it bluntly and not beat around the bush, Christine
and I have decided to have a child together and we are getting married."
After that statement, there was absolute silence. You really could hear a
pin drop. My mother finally said,

	"I will make the assumption Christine that you are already
pregnant?" (My mother was always the blunt one, I guess that's where I got
that from.) And Christine just nodded yes, and responded "2 months now"

	After that, both of her parents, just had a look of distain
directed towards me and my parents, and my father looked back with daggers
in his eyes, and I figured it was he who was going to speak next.  But it
was Christine's father who's voice was speaking.

	So David, you wanted to be married, and decided that the best way
to do it was knock up my kid?"

I stared right back at him with just as much distain and anger after that
comment and then looked at Christine with the same look, and she looked
back at me, and then at her father and said,

	"Actually Daddy, it was not David's fault at all, it was mine.  I
wanted a child, and I love David, and I knew that he loved me and he would
be the perfect person to have a child, and rather than lose him and never
be able to find someone else, I lied to him and told him that I had been on
the birth-control pill, but I had not, and I got pregnant with David."

I thought to myself, well at least she was telling the truth now, but it
didn't matter, I still didn't trust her as far as I could spit.  Once a
liar, always a liar.

After that night, everything changed.  We both transferred back to Perdue
university where we lived-and in what seemed like 30 seconds, we were
married, living together on the outside as a happy couple and on the
inside, doing everything we could to make this marriage work.  And
truthfully I did grow to care more for Christine, but underneath it all, my
true feelings never changed.  I wanted to be with a man and that was it.

It was October 19th at 2:30pm, where I stood in the hospital delivery room
watching the birth of my child.  After what seemed like hours, I finally
heard the screaming cry of a baby, I looked up, and tears started rolling
down my face, I had just been given a son.  The doctor quickly cleaned him
up and then wrapped him in a blanket and placed him in my arms, all of a
sudden he went from screaming, just a quiet wriggling bundle of beautiful
boy.  I instantly fell in love. At this point, nothing else in the world
mattered, I could hate Christine, hate everything, but this being in my
arms had now become my life.  And before handing him over to Christine, to
hold brought him close up and gave him a kiss on the top of his head, and
instead of starting to cry again, he let out this little laugh and smiled.
Oh yea, I was hooked.

I handed him over to Christine to let her hold him, and all of a sudden he
started to scream and cry again.  And I almost laughed out loud, and
thought to myself, "Good Boy!  You already know who you like better."
Which was a mean thought, but in the bottom of my heart, that's how I felt.
She may have wanted a baby, but she really didn't deserve him at all. As
she took him in her arms and rocked him back and forth to calm him down
(which eventually did work), I just stood there staring at the scene in
front of me.  My "wife" and my son, I wasn't even 18 years old yet and I
had wife and a son-but at that moment all of that was trivial, my life had
just changed once again, although this time I could see a light at the end
of the tunnel, at least that's what I hoped it was.

After a few days they finally came home, and we began our so called life as
a family. Truthfully, as much as I wanted to be mad at Christine, I
couldn't be, she had just given me the most wonderful gift in the world and
I could be nothing more than thankful to her.  While the way she did it,
was wrong and deceitful, in the end I still had Joshua. But on the same
token, as much as I loved him, and as much as I could deal with her, my
other wrench was still there, and how long I was going to be able to
suppress it was another issue in itself. But for now, back to Josh.

As time started to pass Josh started growing faster than either of us could
believe, he was a bouncing bumble of joy, always had a smile on his face,
loved to be held and played with.  One thing Christine, always made mention
of was the fact that he had inherited my personality of
"light-heartedness".  And who could argue or complain about that?  Although
something else that became very interesting was the fact that it was only
me who could ever get him to listen and do things.  I was once in the other
room studying for an exam, and Christine was trying to get him to eat his
dinner, and I could hear her struggling with him, and I heard her almost
growl – and I knew that really it was just out of frustration, but at
the same time, made me angry over the fact that it was audible enough that
I could hear it, which meant Josh could definitely hear it, not understand
it, but hear it, and then heard him start to cry, and I immediately got up
and went out there, and she said,

	"David, I can't get him to eat, no matter what I do as you can see,
I'm full of baby food."

I chuckled to myself and then turned to Josh who had stopped crying and
said,

	"What's wrong buddy? You don't like your food? You've got eat it
though, you need it to become a big strong boy!"

He just looked back at me with a big smile and a cute little giggle, and I
took the spoon and baby food , and just brought it over to his mouth and
had no problem at all. He smiled opened his mouth and sucked it right off
the spoon.  I looked up at Christine, and she just stood there shaking her
head, and then down back at Josh and just said to him outloud,

	"Hey big guy boy, you have to listen to mommy. OK? Let mommy finish
feeding you and then I'll come back up later and we can take a bath ok?"
and just smiled and giggled.  I leaned down to give him a kiss on the
cheek, and at the same time he grabbed my shirt and kissed me back. I then
handed the food back over to Christine, and she went to finish feeding him,
and while she was able to do it without much more of a problem.  As I
walked out of the kitchen to go back to studying, I paused and turned
around and looked back into the kitchen, and felt tears well up into my
eyes because there sat the most beautiful creature I had ever seen in my
life, and who I loved with all my heart.  He was the only thing that has
kept me going for the past 2 years, the only reason I didn't walk out on
this marriage.

As time continued to quickly pass, Josh was already 4 years old and
Christine and I were about to graduate from college, even with having
become parents before we started, we somehow managed to make it all the way
through.  As much of a monumental task as that was, and it was, we were now
coming to a crossroads so to what Christine and I were going to do going
forward.  I had already gotten accepted to Purdue to complete a Masters
degree in business, and Christine, had applied for one in science but did
not get accepted.  This was not something that we had expected, and threw a
major wrench into our situation.  It was clear that we now had a major
dilemma on our hands. The question was what were we going to do about
Christine.  It's actually funny, because this was the exact same situation
we were in 4 years ago, except this time there was a child involved.  One
who had become my entire life, from morning to night, I spent as much time
as I possibly could with Josh, it really was the one thing that made me
happy in life.  And he too, seemed perfectly content with that.  But on the
same token he had finally taken to listening to his mother, while it was
not easy to get him to do it, he did.

You see, this was a golden opportunity for me to finally free myself of
this woman and become who I really was, not have to hide it from the world.
You see, while all of this was going on, one thing that ended the day that
Christine told me she was pregnant, was sexual contact.  At first the
excuse for it was simple, you are pregnant and it's not safe to do it.
But, after Josh was born, physically there was no reason not to, the issue
was mental.  I didn't want to.  I wanted to be with a man, I was already 18
years old I was horny as a fuck and needed some sort of release since my
hand was no longer enough.  So yes, I finally started playing around with
other guys.  I initially had a feeling of guilt about it, that I was the
one that was cheating now, something I had said that I would never do –
but I rationalized it to the point that I had made clear to her from the
get-go that I was not in this marriage for her, it was for Josh and that
was it.  And that statement, made it sensible enough for me, that I wasn't
really cheating. But that said, back to the issue at hand.

To get a divorce from Christine could spell absolute disaster for me, at
this young age, the courts always give the custody of a child to the
mother.  If I was to stay at Perdue and she went off somewhere else, I
would get the ability to be who I really was, but at the same time, lose
Josh.  And that in itself would just absolutely kill me.  He really had
become my life, none of the men that I played around with really meant
anything, they were fun to get my rocks off with and that was it, the only
thing in the world that ever really made me happy was being with my son.
And by this point, I'm sure that Christine had figured that out already, I
hadn't touched her in 4 years, and if I was home and not doing something,
or even if I was doing something, I more or less ignored her and paid
attention to Josh and Josh only.  But even with all that, she did have the
courts on her side, and she knew it too.  And we really had both been
dreading having to talk about this, but it had to be done, it was time to
figure out, where do we go from here?