Date: Mon, 8 Jun 2009 04:44:20 -0700 (PDT) From: Joe Parker Subject: I Think I'm in Trouble Chapter 19 I THINK I'M IN TROUBLE Chapter XIX (This one is for Roy and his awesome son W') There is a link, a ribbon or chain that connects us all agether under the lovin watchful gaze of our Heavenly Father, keeping us safe helping us to learn and to live and to love. Points of light that show us the face of God in one anothers countenances. (Jake) Mid-week - Garfield High Aimee Kohl is a dog.., Bow wow wow! I don't like her I don't trust her I don't want Felix anywhere near her. One thing I have come to learn about Felix is how naive he is. The guy really is clueless about certain things. It is partly his naivete that makes hims so attractive. His innocence, goodwill and curiosity shines through him like a beacon. But like all bright lights, it doesn't just draw good people.., it attracts undesirables too. I hate having the feeling that I can't be direct about my concerns regarding Ms Kohl. I get the distinct impression that Felix would defend her till he's blue in the damn face. I see it as my duty to guard him against all people, objects and situations for whom or which he has a blind spot. And warning him yet again about Aimee is a task I'm obliged to do no matter how unpopular it makes me. I have come to learn, appreciate and dread various expressions that can flash across and set upon Felix' beautiful face and the idea that he is 'blue in the face' is quite as apt as the current reality that he has now gone 'red in the face'. His little elfin chin has jutted out and his flashing eyes keep narrowing as they strafe the ground looking side to side before beaming up to clash with my own. From a pure aesthetic point of view it's rather fetching, but to put it figuratively, I feel like I'm in a toaster and I get the sinking feeling that it's not gonna be popping me out any time soon... "What is your evidence Jake?" "It's just a feeling that I have Felix and I'm not the only one - Jessica -- " "I don't care bout what all Jessica and anybody else might think, it ain't right to just badmouth folks when you don't got due reason an all!" "Felix, don't get me wrong here - you asked me to open up to you and so I am trying. I get what you are trying to say also so I'm not going to mention this again alright? - but I think you should be very careful about that lady..." "Jake.., you said you weren't going to mention it again - and that 'lady' has a name - oh my god!" "Fine Felix have your way but don't come crying to me when the wheels fall off 'Ms Kohl's f-cking wheelchair!" "Fine Jake but that was inappropriate!" he glares at me... "Fine Felix" I glare back... "Yalls jez doin the same thing to Miss Aimee that yalls did to me when we first met!" "What the f-ck Felix!?!... that was uncalled for!" "I ain't takin it back, you need to learn not to pre-judge folks based on nothin more than fear! I think we got a lot more important things to be concerned bout than this Jake!" He spins on a dime and stalks off down the suddenly much quieter hall. I feel like lashing out at all the curious and cautious eyes that are carefully surveying me. My mind is reeling, 'Oh Felix my love', 'There is nothing on this Earth more important to me than you - I can't believe we just had a fight like this...' Here I am standing on the same spot where first we met, yet again! Ironic isn't it. My mind goes racing back over what has been one incredible month.., thinking over the many amazing moments that have poured themselves out since then... The intrusive clanging of a bell breaks my reverie. I trudge off to class feeling half the man I used to be. *** If Aimee Kohl is a dog, then Georgia Lewis is a witch.., the bitch and the witch. She took great pleasure in announcing the cancellation of the Starlight Mountain Dance this weekend due to intervening circumstances. She harped on for a while about how disrespectful it would be to the memory of our 'Dear, dear Carol Garfield' and our 'gravely injured Clarke Griersen if we carried on with the event. Even across the public address system her insincerity seems boundless. Adding insult to injury.., cancelling the Fall dance would be the last thing either Clarke or Miss Carol would want. She also announces that tomorrow morning will be a special day off school because of the main funeral service for Miss Carol. I can just hear the reluctance in her voice, she really doesn't want to take the time does she. My heart perishes at the thought that she won't be presenting the major awards on Graduation Day next year.., something she has been doing as long as anyone alive here can remember. Everyone seems to be in a somber mood, some kids from here have already come up top to visit with Miss Carol's family and pay their respects to the old lady. There has been a steady flow of traffic going up and down the hill since Monday afternoon. My sceptical nature tells me that some of them were only visiting in order to take a look at my house.., but I'm probably discrediting Miss Carol's outstanding reputation in the community. I glance over at Felix.., he seems to be more relieved than anything else to be seated in front of me. Since I first stepped into the room today he has studiously avoided making eye contact with me. It just makes me desperately sad. I'm even considering just having it out with him right here, right now... It really doesn't help that Blam is doing her 'cat on heat' routine having seated herself directly in front of him. I guess it's lucky for me that he appears to be giving her dramatic and overblown display the same silent/avoidance treatment he's giving me. It just doesn't sit right with me that I am sharing something like this in common with her. I have that nervous tension leg thing going on and I bring unwanted attention to myself by hitting my knee up against the bottom of my too small desk. Ouch! - why are these f-cking desks always made for f-ucking dwarves! "F-CK!!!" My sudden outburst garners a stern look from the teacher. It also causes Felix to turn around. Well I guess that's one way to get Felix' attention... Our eyes meet, catch and hold, then he looks down.., then he turns away from me back towards the front. Nothing was communicated in that look, no affection, no concern, not even anger or hostility. It just leaves me cold and sadder than hell. Why can't we just sail along happily without having drama after drama come crashing into our lives? Mark and Jessica look on with sympathetic eyes, but I don't need or want their pity. Why is everything so one step forward, two steps backward? Why do we let an argument about a stupid ingrate like Aimee Kohl come between us like this? Maybe he's right, maybe she's annoying but harmless. Hmmmph maybe I should just apologize and drop it? Maybe... I wanna reach out and straighten my baby's crooked collar. His red check shirt did not exactly flatter him a few minutes ago when he was mad at me.., he looked like a glowing Christmas decoration. But right now he looks good enough to eat. Eating him out the other day has served as exquisite fodder for my recent j/o fantasies. I find it's myself who is reddening as I begin to get that tell-tale heated flush that comes just before I myself actually end up 'cumming'... Damn boy! - the things you can do to me! I look around the room guiltily and you guessed it - Mark's beady blue eyes, his laughing blue eyes are right on me as I try my damnedest to cool off. "Jake you nasty boy!" he whispers too loudly, gaining the attention of both Felix and a forbidding Jessica who gives him a very sharp look. Mark has the good grace to wince. This time Felix shows some emotion.., disdain - oh well, at least it's a start. "Maaan Jacob you gotta quit emitting those testosterone fired fantasies around the room dude, I wore tight pants today!" "Mark do you HAVE to engage in such juvenile nonsense?" - Jessica... "Pussy whipped" I whisper back in my admittedly ridiculous version of a falsetto voice. "Cock lashed" he laughs before getting kicked by Jess. Our juvenile banter only makes me miss Clarke even more... Felix turns around slightly and quickly looks me in the eye before sliding his glance aside and away from me. He looks hurt and sad and it makes me feel terrible. I don't want to just straighten out his collar.., I really wanna straighten out the bad feelings that have created the distance between us this morning. All I wanna do is be near Felix and not have him mad at me. It's all I wanna do. *** I hate hospitals and everything about them.., Charleston Area Medical Center is no exception. My mind fills with thoughts of super-bugs and incompetent student doctors. I know it's unfair but I am just freaked of the whole hospital environment. My already bad mood is not helped by the fact that I am at the hospital today without Felix. I refocus my mind on the whole reason I am here in the first place and just get on with it. Being offside with Felix hasn't been helpful and Mark's penchant for telling wickedly disgusting 'operations gone wrong' stories is likewise not the best. The last thing I wanna hear about is patients mistakenly having surgical pads and scissors stitched up inside of them in the operating theater. Dad is going to be bringing some really expensive surgical teams to work on Clarke in the weeks to come. I hope they will be worth all the money it's gonna cost to procure their services. It was meant to be me Felix and Mark today but when I reminded Felix at lunch he said he had to do some project work for his journalism seminar and was very sorry. He did look very sorry, guilty even but I still felt angry in my gut about it. Have you ever been in that situation where you really want to just lash out and express your feelings but you know you just can't? I HATE it! I wanna tell Felix that I think he should be with me, going to see Clarke. I also really want to ask him point blank if he is just trying to avoid me? But I just can't. When I weigh up my options it would potentially cause too much damage to confront him with my concerns. I have already seen where that can get me today. No need to get my ass kicked all over again. Instead I'll just have to go back to having this awful hollow feeling inside, this gut churning that worms it's way through my innards. Besides, I am meant to be just letting it go. Aimee Kohl is just a nice harmless photo-journalist lady. That word potential, and its close neighbor - the word 'potentially'... in this context can be most damaging. It causes us to fear, to second guess, to doubt because 'potentially' such and such could happen. If we select option A then a 'potentially' very undesirable scenario may occur. Yet then again, it is a possibility that nothing bad will happen at all. Possibilities and potentialities.., how is it that they can represent equally what is potentially possible..., and potentially impossible? I just don't know. "So Jakey, I know you hate hospitals but this isn't a drive-in medical center bro... says Mark.., We're gonna actually have to exit the truck in order to enter the hospital dude" I shake myself off like a wet seal and give him the one fingered salute. "Lead on loser" I respond, my trademark smirk back in place, albeit only just. He puts his arm around my neck and reaches up to give me a noogie before lightly punching me in the guts. "Don't ever forget Maxson, you are one lucky son of a gun!" he chuckles. "Don't let em tell you any different, you are always gonna be a winner bro!" "I appreciate it dude" I reply warmly, "But Maaaark you're still the biggest loser in Forkridge haha!" "Well thank the Lord we ain't in Forkridge right now right?" he says, his bright humor is infectious and I match his brilliant smile. "Haha you're still the loser Mark Fisher!" "Hehe, it's all a matter of perspective dude! - Come on -- race ya!" There's another word, perspective... *** I did not expect to find Dad and Momma Kath here so it was a pleasant surprise. " Hi Dad! - Momma Kath.., did you come up here alone? - are the kids back with Lenore? - Momma Kath have you met Mark? -- this is he" "Woah there tiger, one interrogation at a time aight?" laughs my father who hugs me into him whilst ruffling Marks too perfect coif. "Howdy Mark I'm Felix' Momma" "What's up Mrs J?" says Mark. "Son the kids are here along with Lenore, they went to the play area" informs my father. "Some other good news is that Clarke is no longer on the critical list and he's gonna be moved out of here to another private room tonight" "Hey that's great news Dad! - where's Mr and Mrs G?" "They're just down at the desk sorting out some paperwork. Now Clarke still has a long way to go but things are definitely beginning to pick up now. He will remain on this floor just down the other end" "Great Dad! I'm so glad to hear that!" I hug my father again. I can't believe how confident he has become, strutting around the hospital like he owns it, not a single sign of nervousness to be found. I'm sure that a lot of his new found confidence is due to the calming, centering influence of Momma Kath. Felix has much the same effect on me. I get the feeling that if not for her, Dad would be sneaking in here in the middle of the night to visit. "Son why don't you and Mark go on over and visit with your buddy now, we will go get coffee and soda's for you boys" "Sure Dad see you guys soon"... Even though Clarke is meant to have improved a great deal he doesn't look it. He looks like a mummy who went through a food processor. Me and Mark take turns holding his hand and we begin to shoot the breeze, talking about school, about how Dr. Lewis cancelled the Starlight Mountain Dance, how we are gonna miss him come football time. Mark tells him that Jessica is taking good care of his cat and teases him about his goth looking black eyes. By the time Dad and Aunt Kath return with Mr and Mrs Griersen in tow, we have pretty much caught Clarke up on all the local happenings. The only thing we don't talk about is the investigation into his attack or the passing of Miss Carol. We have been told to leave both those subjects for later. "Oh hello boys!" says Mrs Griersen - she hugs and kisses us both and we shake hands with Clarke's Dad. "I'm so glad you guys made the trip up here to Charleston, I know he can't tell you but it really does mean so much to Clarke and I know how busy you guys are" Mrs Griersen has always been kinda emotional and right now tears have sprung to her eyes, but I can totally understand her behavior. "It been great having Junior up here everyday too, and so many others have come daily to visit the least of which is your father here and Kathleen. And we sure know there are so many other important things going on right now" I sense she is alluding to Miss Carol's death - which is something I'm really trying my hardest not to think about. I can't let myself ponder what's left for me, for all of us in the wake of the old lady's passing. I steel myself, promising in my mind that I will let it all out come service time tomorrow.. "Yes boys, we never really had a chance to thank you for finding Clarke but we are so grateful to you" says an equally emotional Mr Griersen. Now that is unusual but given the circumstances maybe not. "It was the dog Mr Griersen, honestly if not for the dog we wouldn't have gone down that bank" says Mark. Mark is as honest as the day is long, I was about to do an 'Awww shucks' and take all the credit I can get.., I certainly know Clarke would have if he could speak. I nod at Clarke.., "You know Mr and Mrs Griersen, this is the quietest I've ever known Clarke to be" As usual I speak without thinking.., I'm generally pretty quiet myself and now I think I know why... The silence in the room is palpable, Dad has a stern expression on his face and Momma Kath has her hand over her mouth. "Ha!...." Mr Griersen begins to laugh... his blue eyes lighting up like beacons, Clarke's eyes. "Hehe he he he!" Mrs Griersen joins him and soon everyone in the room is in hysterics except for me. A pretty red haired nurse pops her head in the door to check and I give her the 'get me out of here stat!' look. Alas she leaves me in with the crazies. Sheese I never thought it was THAT funny, Mr Griersen had to sit down and hold his gut, he's laughing so hard. Maybe there's a future for me in Stand up... The only thing worse than laughing at your own jokes unaccompanied is not getting your own jokes but everyone else does... and I wasn't even joking. Oh well at least Clarke gets what I mean, I hope. I just wish Felix was here, he'd know exactly what I meant! -- I think... *** (Lenore) Big hospitals are a world unto themselves and they have always intrigued me. I see them as exciting, intense places to be and I really enjoy the business and the sheer vitality of them. People everywhere in the daytime, rushing about attending to their duties, seeking assistance, visiting and of course waiting.., the interminable waiting. The evening comes and things settle down but never completely. The ER area never quits and there are other pockets and little hives of activity going on throughout the rest of the hospital. I've always wondered at how well they tend to conceal the deaths of patients - which must happen of course, but you rarely see them wheeling the bodies of the dead off to the morgue do you? Operating theaters, morgues, chapels, wards, laundry's, offices, physical therapy gyms, security, consulting chambers and kitchens. All these vital and very different components make up this phenomenon we call the modern hospital.., or slaughterhouse as Brad so uncouthly put it the other day... Getting lost is also another part of hospital lore. They can have the best maps and direction charts but people being people are still apt to wander off and get lost - or be lost from the outset. And such is me.., I am trying to wrack my brain in order to figure out the best way to get back to Clarke's room. If it wasn't for the easy distraction of all the hot young physicians here, I would have been fine... Oh yessss.., all the hot doctors - wow some awesome specimens work round here and because this hospital is connected to the university there are a lot of young studs too hehehe. If I never had the two lil darlings I would definitely be on the prowl. I've already been given the twice over by several of the devilishly handsome young professionals, and more than a few older ones.... Unfortunately the indoor children's playground isn't the best place to meet hot guys. Abby is playing on the slide and Lil Shaun is in the tube house. I can see him peeping out of each little window he squirms past to check that we have not abandoned him. He is a little young to be in there but he's a very determined wee fellow. A very distinctive little voice carries across the herrum skerrum of jostling children and piques my interest. I seek out the owner of the voice. He's currently telling off a much larger boy of about 11 or even 12 who won't let Abigail climb the slide. "Hey now how would you like it if I stopped you from going on the slide huh?" Says the owner of the booming little voice. "Shut up, no girls are allowed on this slide and she's a giiiirl!" The other boy smirks and pulls Abigail away from the slide.., "Don't touch her you meany!" The little boy is surprisingly strong and yanks the older boys hands off Abigail before pushing him roughly away. "Yeah don't touch me and let me go on the slides!" Says Abigail who also knows how to stick up for herself. I can see Lil Shaun's face frowning as he watches the scene through another window. "Who is this your wife or somethin ha ha ha!" The bigger boy looks at a buddy of his for support. The other boy laughs and makes kissing noises. "Hey I'm not his wife's! - that's just silly talk, you make me sea sick!" I don't know where Abigail picked that one up from. "Yes you are my wife, well one day you will be" declares the red haired little boy. "I will nots!" "Will too" "Will NOTS!" she crosses her little arms and stamps her foot, tossing her hair. "Will too and we can't get divorced!" "I will nots, I'm gonna have lots of boyfriends like Miss Lenore" I wince, kids see and notice EVERYTHING. "No you won't, I won't allow it, I will blanquish them!" "What does blanquish mean?" "I don't know but it's magic!" "Hey I thought we was arguing bout this here slide!" interjects the other boy, but Abby and the little red haired boy ignore him, the slide long forgotten. Lil Shaun who has now exited the tube house comes wobbling over obviously intending on backing up his sister against the bully and her apparent future 'husband'. "Nnnnnnoooo! - bad naughty!" He cries... I think it's time to intervene. Just as I begin to head over there the bully kid swings his foot out aiming to trip up Lil Shaun. I am too far away and I yell trying to get the boy to stop. But before I can get there the little red haired boy moves quicker than lightning and soundly kicks the bigger boy in the shin of his other leg causing him to screech out in pain and begin hopping around. The other bully boy rushes at Abby's 'husband' and gets a long vicious scratch right down the middle of his face for his efforts. "Aaaarrgh!" he stumbles away holding his face. This little boy can fight! - Wow! "Serves you right!" cries Abigail. "That'll learn y'alls not to mess with mines boyfriend!" "Husband" "Boyfriends!" "NOT hubben! - NOT boyfenn! -- YUCKY!" cries Lil Shaun screwing his face up and shaking his head. The two bully's have fast fled the scene and I arrive to find Abigail and the cute freckled red head staring at each other. "Well well, what do we have here?" I say... "Hello Mam, I was looking after this little girl and her brother from those bullies..." Lil Shaun has come up to the hero kid and is now holding his hand. "Miss Lenore I has mines first boyfriends here! - do yalls like hims? She pulls him in front of her like one of her larger Dolly's and presents him to me. "Well do you?" "Oh honey I love him, what a good 'catch' he is! What's your name honey?" He extricates himself from Abigail and Lil Shaun's grasp and draws himself up to his full height. "My name is Mikey and I am a knight and a husband, I am 7 years old" "Well honey I am very pleased to meet you and I am very very thankful to you for protecting the two little children here" "That's okay those boys always bully other kids and I got sick of it I did!" "Well you are a very strong little boy and you did well. Your wife's name is actually Abigail and the boy beside you is Lil Shaun" "Noooo big Shaun!" the little mite calls out in protest... "Hi big Shaun, hi Ar-bee-gail..." he enunciates her name carefully and slowly. "Miss Le-nooore, are you sick, is that why you are visiting the hostible?" "Naw honey we are visiting another young man who was in a terrible accident.., and he needs lots of love and attention" "Well my Momma is the bestest nurse here and if you need her help she is on the 3rd floor okay?" "The 3rd floor? - wow that's cool because our friend is also on the 3rd floor and that is where we are going right now - but we are kinda lost... can you lead the way Mikey?" "Sure I can, follow me and watch out for the dragons! - they are dangerous..." "Dragons?" questions Abby, her eyes as wide as saucers. "Dra-uhns?" echoes Lil Shaun. "Uh huh, they look like old ladies and they dress in nurse outfits but really they are wicked dragons in disguise, but don't worry I will protect you and I know every cool hidey place in this hostible too I do!" "Will y'alls blanquish thems?" says Abigail. "Yep!" "Yep!" copies Lil Shaun. We follow the personable young knight down a corridor to the elevator bank and head on up to the 3rd floor. Phew it's the last place I would have chosen. (Jake) I have never felt comfortable around the adults but Mark definitely is and I quite admire the aplomb and adroitness he exhibits when dealing with the parents. It allows me to just sit back, smile and wave - if you know what I mean. I'm kinda distracted anyway, my mind keeps drifting off to the other half of me, wondering where he is, how he's doing.., whether he's still mad at me. Trying to formulate a way to get back into his good graces. Love is a double edged sword, even though I'm sure I'm not the first person to think or say that, it certainly feels like that to me. I suppose it's because it is indeed my first time. It's agony this feeling I have knowing I have upset him and wishing we were together so I could prove to him how much I do love him and show him that he can trust me to do right by him. My motivation to 'win him back' is an urge, a raw desire that has me itching to get back to him. Which in turn makes me feel guilty because I am meant to be here visiting my buddy Clarke. But Felix was meant to be here too! It's just not fair. Shoot listen to me going on and on about Felix. I'd be the first to ridicule this kind of behavior in somebody else. He's really got me by the cajones this time. Looking at my buddy does indeed drag my mind off Felix for a few moments. I am churning inside with a cold and calculated fury. They WILL capture the sick b##tard who did this to Clarkey and I WILL find some way to pay whoever he is a nice little visit. Mark my words, coz I'm gonna do it. I can feel my eyes turning black... I can't let that happen or I'm gonna be an absolute prick for the rest of the day. I need to find something nice and fluffy to think about or I'm sunk. Everybody else are all happily chatting away when the door suddenly bursts open and for a moment it looks as if it opened on it's own. That's when I see a familiar freckle faced little kid, the one and only Mikey. His curious eyes rake the room with that shamelessness that only young kids can affect. He gauges everyone as if they are the visitor to his domain and not the other way round. Hey what's Mikey doing here? Shortly after Lenore enters the room carrying Lil Shaun with Abigail bringing up the tail end. Mikey has recognized me and he smiles with delight. I can feel my eyes beginning to lighten all over again. "Well hello again lil man what a surprise!" He runs to me and leaps straight into the air fully expecting me to catch him, which of course I fully do.., hey I am an dedicated athlete after all, it's what I do. "Mr Jake!!! - YAY!" "Heya little buddy what are you doing here? Are you stalking me?" I swing him around the room causing Momma Kath and Miss Dina to duck out of the way - what? -- don't they trust my awesome coordination and swinging kid skills? Mark of course doesn't move an inch, he knows full well I've got everything under control. Okay so Mikey's foot kicks a vase of flowers onto the floor spilling water and blooms in it's plastic tumbler wake. It's nothing the ladies can't fix right? "Jake, look what you've done now" chides my father. The ladies do indeed rush off to get mops and whatever else it is they need. They take the two squirming, excited kids with them. "Thanks Lenore honey for taking the kids to the play area" says Momma Felix as she heads out the door. "It's no problem Mam" Lenore replies easing further into the room. "Well look at me with all these handsome men" laughs Lenore fanning herself as she takes a seat. "Awww thanks sweety but I'm happily married, you'll have to try one of these turkeys" jokes Mr Griersen, I can see where Clarke gets his sense of humor from and his killer smile. I'd like to think that Mr Griersen's last statement signals him being on good terms again with his wife because it was obvious he was on the outer just a couple of days ago, just like me and Felix today. "So hows it goin champ?" says my father, addressing Mikey. "I'm good, are you his daddy Sir?" he nods his head and squirms so I let him go. He saunters straight over to my dad looking him up and down. "You look like him but you ain't got funny eyes though" he observes. "Ummm thanks little buddy, Jake has his mother's crazy eyes, his good looks come from me of course" Everybody chuckles except for Mikey and me. "You shouldn't say that about ladies coz they could turn into a dragon and burn you all up!" "Oh don't I just know it son, I've got burn marks all over my body" Dad chuckles. "Ya me too" seconds a bemused Mr Griersen. Mikey just stares at him with those guileless eyes that kids everywhere seem to possess. Mikey returns to me and I let him scramble up onto my shoulders. It's a good thing I am sitting down or his head would have gone through the ceiling. I explain to the guys how Felix and I met Mikey and his sister at the mall and how he and his family are going to come to the Maxson Christmas Party in a couple of weeks time. "Wow how cool, and what brings you to the hospital lil guy?" asks Mark who is as taken with my new little friend as everyone else is. I'm feeling kinda proprietary, not wanting Mark to steal my new found friend away from me. "Hey you ain't Felix, are you Jake's new boyfriend?..." Never was there a truer saying than 'The silence in the room was deafening'. I think everyone knows that there's something going on between Felix and me but this is the first time it's actually been raised in public among my family and lifetime friends and I would never have dreamed that it would be Mikey who would air it. But then again knowing what I know about the fearless little boy, it's definitely something he could do and has... "Errrm no Felix is still my boyfriend, this is Mark.., he failed the boyfriend test coz he's butt ugly haha!" Mikey giggles, Dad looks relieved at my pressure release tactic of trying humor, but he disapproves of me ribbing on Mark. "Son don't talk about your friend like that in front of the ladies and the children!" "Oh I don't mind Mr Maxson" - says Lenore.., "Besides I like ugly boys like Mark here" It's pretty rare to see Mark embarrassed but right now there can be no doubt. First he is mistakenly taken for my boyfriend by the little fireplug and then secondly ole Lenore is making eyes at him... "If it's all the same to you guys I kinda like being single" Mark ducks his head and avoids making eye contact - awww how touching... something tells me Mark's not telling the whole truth here but I am happy to let it ride. He notices my rather insouciant grin and winces all over again. Oh yeah, I know who's the dirty boy haha! "Hey who's that boy there?" Mikey points straight at the comatose Clarke. "That's Clarke, he's my son.., Mr Griersen replies. "What happened to him?" "He got hurt very bad but now he is doing a lot better and is in the right place" "A dragon did it" "Haha no we don't really know who did it or how exactly it happened but we sure hope to find out..." "No a dragon did it, he got burned up by a wicked dragon" My dad looks over at a nonplussed Jeb Griersen.., "I guess he's speaking figuratively Jeb, you know how kids can be. The 'Dragon' is probably representative of whoever the guy is that did this" Mikey shakes his head emphatically. "No I ain't, that boy was burned up by the dragon and it was a lady dragon, not a guy dragon" The hairs on my neck are standing up and my spine is tingling. A sudden howling wind intrudes from beyond the thick plate glass windows and we all shiver. Little Mikey turns straight towards me and his eyes, his voice.., they remind me so much of.., they REMIND me so much of - nah I must be crazy. "There's a sorcerer lady too, a witch lady, she is helping the dragon." "I think we should blanquish them! Please Uncle Jake, can we blanquish them?" "Oh my God what the hell is up with this kid?" "Mikey darlin, what you say is most interesting indeed" It's Lenore and never have I seen her beautiful eyes so bright, glowing green with inner light. It's right at this moment that the ladies return with brooms, a mop and bucket with disinfectant spray and a plastic litter scoop. The children holding hands follow behind them both of them sucking on lollipops. The weird mood quickly dissipates but I notice all the previous occupants of the room are still all eyes on Mikey. And he is still gazing intently at Clarke. "I am gonna come and visit him everyday, and together we will prepare to slay the dragon and blanquish the sorcerer" I just don't know what the hell to think... And then a nurse strides into the room... "Mikey! - excuse me everybody this is my son..." she glances round apologetically. Michael I thought I heard your voice - what are you doing in here disturbing these kind people?" "Mommy this is my friend Jake and he gonna be at the Christmas Party!" We all pretty much make introductions to his mother who turns out to be the attractive red haired nurse I saw earlier. I cracked up when Mikey pointed at Abigail and declared her to be his future wife. The look on every-ones face was priceless. Those who had been in here minutes earlier were already starting to get the impression that this kid was smokin some pretty whack stuff and he certainly did himself no favors with this latest revelation. Abigail herself did not seem too perturbed by his assertion and neither did her little brother (which surprised me) In fact she went over to Mikey and they held hands which everyone thought was rather cute, even his flustered mother had a twinkle in her eye. I'd laugh if they really DID end up getting hitched - imagine that?... Shortly after that Mikey's Mom apologized for intruding once more and then gathered her son to her but not before Lenore grabbed him and gave him a big hug and kiss. But I also saw her whisper something in his ear, and he whispered something back. Next he comes over to me and I twirl him around and hug him goodbye. "I can't wait to see you at the Christmas Party real soon little man, and I will be at your birthday party!" "Do you promise?" "Yep and we will have just the best time ever!" "Really? and will Felix be there too?" "I'll do everything I can to make sure he does" "Good coz you look real sad without him here" ".............." I can't speak so I give him a little peck on the cheek (which he screws his face up at) before releasing him. I laugh and release him breathing in the smell of little boy which makes me yearn to have a kid of my own. "Bye Mr Jake, bye everybody, bye Big Shaun! -- Bye bye Ar-bee-gail" I note the shyer quieter tone when he addresses Abby. His mother gives us one more long suffering shrug before leading her live-wire son through the door by the hand. He takes a final look in the direction of our sleeping knight and nods, muttering something that none of us can hear nor discern. We all say goodbye as his Mother closes the door behind them quietly. "That people is one interesting young fellow" observes Mark. "Yes" says Mr Griersen.., "I feel like a mini tornado just blew through this place" "He is a little sweetheart! - just adorable, and do I hear Wedding Bells Kath?" says Dina Griersen. "Now now Miss Dina! - my daughter has to at least be able to sign her name proper afore she goes off marrying handsome young hospital boys!" Everybody laughs when Abby reminds everybody that he's only her boyfriend. *** "Well guys it's been a long day and we have an even longer day ahead of us tomorrow" says Dad. "Kathleen and I are gonna head back to Forkridge now but Jeb, Dina I want you both to know that if you do not feel up to coming to the funeral tomorrow, we will all completely understand. You know that Miss Carol would want you to remain with your son" Mr Griersen shakes his head vehemently and raises his hand to belay my father. "Ryan, we appreciate you guys so much and we will be there tomorrow. We owe the old lady everything we have and even then it is not enough. For the life of our son we are forever indebted to Miss Carol, we don't understand how but we know that somehow she sensed his need when it was greatest and do you know Ryan, how precious, how wondrous that is to us" Miss Dina sits near her son, holding his hand to her face, swaying and weeping gently, humming a lullaby that she probably sang to him in his childhood. A tune that most definitely she would never have expected to be singing again until she had grandchildren to rock. "Ryan and Jake, your family's help has enabled us to focus completely on being with our son and you will forever have our gratitude" Dad waves this away, I don't quite know where to look.., it's times like these I really do still feel like a kid. It will be a very long time before I am ready to represent my family and it's interests in any kind of meaningful way. I'm glad that Mr Griersen is looking at my father and not at me. My father replies with a very heavy choked sounding voice. "Old friend, how long have we known each other? We were 4 and you asked me if God lived on top of Maxson Mountain... I said no but I know that the devil lives up there and she is a big old black lady..." They chuckle at the memory.., "Sweet sweet Dina, I have known you since 2nd grade, and you could beat the crap out of me till Senior High" "It was my decision to quit bustin your butt Ry hehehe" It's weird watching old folks behaving like this... "Well anyway haha -- we have shared so many wonderful times together and I have not forgotten that when I lost Shonta, you both were there for me, giving me the courage and will to believe that someday the sun would shine again in my life and so it does" He hugs Kathleen Jarrow to him and kisses her hair while winking at the kids. Dina you took Jake and you let him see what it was like to live in a regular home in a regular neighborhood. He had a grandmother, he had a nanny but you gave him a mother. So please believe me when I say that you both owe me and my family absolutely nothing... on the contrary it's us who owe you" I hang my head flicking away crystal droplets with my fingertips. It's true, it's not only Clarke that I am here for, it's his Mom and Dad too. I know that Mr G has had his ups and downs with Clarke in the last few years but there's no denying how much they all mean to one another. We are all linked, even Mark and Lenore have incredibly strong bonds to all of us. There's no denying how much we all mean to one another. Miss Carol always had a saying.., She said that there is an invisible ribbon that links us all together keeping us safe helping us to learn and to live and to love. Maaaan I wish she was still here, God how I wish my Felix was here... Dina holds out her arms to me and I crawl into her arms letting her hold me and mother me like she used to do. How is it that we can always fit into the embrace of a loved one like this - no matter how much we grow? For many years I spent almost every weekend down at the Griersen's so that I could spend time with the town kids. Often Elroy would join me because we were the only kids our age up top. My closeness to Clarke is something that can never be lost. Even when we were fighting, I always knew that sooner or later we would be okay again. We have wandered through one anothers homes and lives for years and my anger at the perpetrator is because of the deep hurt and anguish I feel over the grave injuries committed against someone who is closer than a best friend, much more like a beloved brother. I cannot get away from the fact that if not for this horrible act, Miss Carol would still be with us today. I cling to Clarke's Mom, I imagine Miss Dina is holding me like she wishes she could hold Clarke. Dad kisses Dina, hugs Jeb then kisses Clarke on the forehead, Miss Kathleen does the same. It's been cool seeing Felix' Mom and Miss Dina becoming close friends over the past few weeks. It is an amazing thing how rewarding life is when you take the time to let people into your life, when you give each other the benefit of your concern and share with them the miracle of yours and their love. I don't know where the hell I get my nasty, contrary behavior from, having all these amazing people in my life you wouldn't think so. But I have been trying so hard in the past couple of weeks to get a grip on my life and treat people better than I have and it all started because of a violet eyed blond boy who snuck into my heart and now lives there. Oh God if anything ever happened to Felix, I'd be done. "Son, I'll see you back up top for dinner and for the night service. Marky, will I see you tomorrow?" "I'll be there tonight Mr Maxson" "Good, see you then champ" "Mr Maxson, Miss Kathleen.., would you mind if I caught a ride back with the boys today? - And I will also see you guys tonight for evening service" says Lenore. "Sure honey" says Momma Kath, "Make sure those boys don't speed" "She's the last one you want to say that too" mumbles Mark. "What was that?" growls Lenore... "Nothin..." "Yeah I thought so" *** Most of the trip home is spent trying to ignore the constant bickering going on between Mark and Lenore who claimed shotgun, which put his nose out of joint. It's not till we're almost home when I remember something I wanted to ask Lenore about earlier... "Lenore, tell me what you were whispering about with Mikey back there?" "Hmmm oh yeah now THAT was very interesting and what an intriguing boy!" "Yeah he sure is now spill!" "I just asked him what he saw when he looked at Clark" "Okay aaaand?" "He said he saw a boy" "Yeah well Clarke IS a boy after all" snorts Mark. "Yeah well if the 'dragon' had her way he sure wouldn't be" retorts Lenore. "What?" I am confused... "The sick human who did that to Clarke is a woman guys, and something stopped her from finishing the job..." I can't handle all this at the moment and she hasn't answered my original question either... "Lenore, what DID you guys talk about back there - what the hell did Mikey say he saw?!?" "Alright! - keep your shirt on, or maybe on second thoughts.., how bout you take it off for me darlin?" "You crazy bitch!" - There goes my plans of improving my behavior... "Haha talk dirty to me baby! - okay, okay! -- but couldn't you just undo maybe one or two buttons.." "Lenore I swear if I have to stop this truck you are gonna be walking home!" "Ummm bro, we are only 2-3 minutes walk from her house dude..." "Mark whose side are you on!?! -- Geeeeeeeeze!" "Hehe Mark your ass looked particularly hot today by the way, I just wanted to put it out there" Lenore is a cougar in waiting. Sudden silence from the peanut gallery... "Okay seriously Jake, he said he saw a boy..., I asked how old -- Mikey thinks that Clarke is 9 or maybe 10 years old guys" "WTF!?!" "Oh Jake you are such a drama queen honey..." "You both know that Clarke seems to have regressed into a childlike state, at least that's what they determined when he was talking for that short period they had him back with us" "Little Mikey seems to see him as a literal 9 year old, so do you know what that tells me about Mikey boys?" "Nope, I'm lost" I'm not really lost -- I just don't know what to think... "It means that Mikey has some kind of gift or ability like Miss Carol's, he has the sight" ventures Mark. "Right on my blonde honeychild!" "And now I'm gonna tell you both something else... The 'dragon' we're looking for is is the one and only Aimee Kohl, and the sorcerous witch is none other than Georgia Lewis your most esteemed principal..." If I hadn't already pulled up to the kerb and parked the car in front of Lenore's and Junior's house.., I think I would have crashed. My mind fills with only one thought... 'FELIX!' *** (Much later that night) Two bitter women sitting in a room, one on whiskey the other on rum. "I sthtill think you wenth justh a lil bith faaaar wizz zat Griersen boy honey" says the first. "But then again, he wassss an arrogant lil baths--rd" "Ooooohhh not quite faar nuff my dear thister! -- I wanted to burn it off but my phone ssstarted ringing annnn I got the heeebies!" "Who wath it dahhling?" "You might noth bleeve it but it wath that ole black bitch! - I wath like how the f-ck dith you get thith number you nosey cow!?!" "I warned you she wass dan-ger-russ before you came here! - I toll you she would sniff you out moment you came inside town limitss. Thass why I said stay out at that motel coz then she can't find so easy. The voice warned me bout her!" "Well ith okay coz although I answered the ph-ph--phone I dith not speak" "Ohhh? you ansssswred? - whass she say?" "She said she know whath I'm doing and got the copsss out" "And thass when you called me and I come help you dispose of him - S' a pity he sthill live, I can't bloody believe it ho ho ho!" "My but he wath a good lay, beautiful high school boy hehehehe. I had the moth glorious time breaking him everywhere, a lil bit of rohypnol and a lot of love! ha ha!!!" "And so much more where that came from too my dear old Aimee!" "Yeth Georgie, ith nearly drawing to an end for uss innit? Our pact is sacred and we will honor it fully after all theese years!" "Oh yes oh yessss Aimee dear, when we go out it will be with just the biggest bang ever, we will be the moth famouth girls thith town ever thaw!" "Promise?" "Croth my hearth an hope to die a mosth horrible death!" "Good" They have been repeating this same conversation for the past four nights. Even madness loves to hear its every little victory extolled. Whiskey woman attempts to stand and cross the room to pour herself another glass of Jack Daniels, but she sways and falls back into her recliner. Rum woman obliges her, getting up out of her wheelchair and walks over to the decanter topping her best friends tumbler up for the 13th time this night. Please join me again for the next chapter~