Date: Sat, 15 Feb 2014 08:50:44 +0000 From: Raul Bimenyimana Subject: Matters of The Heart 2 MATTERS OF THE HEART 2 I would like to start this chapter by thanking everyone who sent me mail,I am very grateful for the kind words and support.I'd like to thank Pen and Colin(from Australia)for encouraging me and their kind words led me to complete this chapter faster and to nifty for giving me the opportunity to post the story. I have noticed some mistakes with the first chapter please forgive me for them. Warning:Acts of sex between consenting male individuals ahead,if you are offended by this exit now,if you happen to be a minor then don't read this and if you do,don't read this in front of the authorities,I wouldn't be liable for whatever consequences that may befall you. Latly some people asked me if this story is based on events that actually occured in my life,the truth is that only part of it is,especially the beginning is based on true life events.The characters in the story have been given different names to protect their identities. Looking back at how Frank and I met,I always knew that he was the one I'd always love,at the moment I was uncertain if the love would ever be reciprocated but I was certain I loved him. He was an engineering student at the University of Pennsylvania and he was in his final year,as excited as he was about finishing school he was very busy as well and rarely saw his family anymore. "So what's Nairobi like?"he asked."It's the most beautiful place you could ever be in,it's more populous than Philadelphia but there's lots to see and the wildlife reserve in the area is beyond magnificent" "Really do they like have lions,elephants,hyenas and cheetahs?!"he asked excitedly as mention of wildlife sparked his interest."Yeah""And you've seen them?!""Yes I have,you can see them in their orphanage or out in the wild I've done both""Wow". At that very moment,Aunt Eva arrived with Malaika,Malaika however ran toward Frank giving him a big hug which he returned affectionately."And how is my little angel doing?!""Fine,look uncle I lost a tooth""Well would you look at that someones becoming a big girl""Hi,Frank""Hi,Eva"he approched Eva with Malaika in one arm and hugged her with the other."I see you've already met my nephew,Riley""Yeah,I have he was keeping me company while waiting and he sure does have some stories""Honey,you don't just live in Nairobi and lack some exciting stories,and how is school?""School is fine,I just took a break this weekend to relax a bit and decided to drop by and say hello,I was hoping I'd catch Steve""He's running a few errands but he'll be back in a while,let's take a seat""And how is Fiona doing?""She's fine,I haven't been seeing her much lately because of the frantic schedule but she's good". It felt like a little jab to my heart when Fiona was mentioned but I realised that a guy like him must be straight and have a girlfriend,so I resolved the matter by telling myself whoever this Fiona person was,she was one lucky bitch. Later on in the afternoon Steve came back from work and it was quite a touching sight to see what kind of special bond the two brothers had as they engaged in playful teasing.It was a beautiful affair and they all involved me in their conversations making me feel like family. Later we all had dinner speacially prepared by me and Aunt Eva.We had chapatis,samosas,rice,chicken,kales and spinach along with ugali.All these were delicacies I had learnt to cook from my mom,and cooking them with Eva brought so many fond memories. They all practically devoured the food,even little Malaika which made me very happy."Well there's no doubt you took after your mother in the kitchen department,"Aunt Eva said"You always cook well but you've outdone yourself today.""Eva's right this is really great"Frank added,while Steve affirmed with a yeah. Moments later Malaika was trying to stay awake but failing miserably and Eva decided to take her to her room shortly after Malaika bid us all goodnight.Some minutes later I also said my goodnights to Steve and Frank and went to my room.In my room,I lay on my bed and couldn't help the big smile that found its way on my face when I remembered the events of the day.Remembering Franks face,his eyes,his body,just then a knock on the door woke me up from my reverie. "Come in",Eva came in closing the door gently."You like him,"she said more of a statement than a question.She was always like that,straight to the point,the queston took me by surprise so I remained silent thinking of something to tell her."It's ok,you know you don't have to hold back what you feel anymore," "I know" "Really then start acting like you do and I've already told you that this is also your home too.You've been walking on eggshells and are nervous everytime.RELAX." "Sorry,I'm not used to just saying how I feel or talking about my attraction for other guys with someone but I promise to loosen up a bit more""Good,now will you tell me about your little crush on Frank""Aunt Eva!"I whined"By this point you should know that whining ain't gonna help you,now spill it"I sighed again,arguing with her was hopeless so I just resolved to tell her the truth."Yes I like him""How did it happen""I don't know,I just did,I just met him and he completely blew me away""Whoa,now I understand it's normal to have a crush on someone but I don't want to see you get hurt you do know that he's straight,right?""Yah""And that he has a girlfriend""Yah,I know,don't worry I know all that""Oh Riley it's ok,you're still young,you'll find someone who'll love you and be their for you."She said holding my hands,I could only give a nod in reply as the lump in my throat was going to betray my emotions if I spoke. After that day,I thought of Frank more often than anyone else before.The only person I ever thought of frequently was my late mother,but not in that sense.I remembered of his blue eyes,his full red lips,his fine black hair,his strong jaw and as much as I tried telling myself that I shouldn't get my hopes up I just ended up thinking of him. School went on well,my grades couldn't be any better my social life on the other hand wasn't doing as well.Apart from Claire,Sean and Daniel I didn't have many friends.Some acquaintances but not many friends.Steve and Eva always supported me with school always telling me how proud they were when I came home with good grades. I didn't get to hang out with Frank as often as I'd like Frank eventually graduated and even Steve threw him a party.This is when I got to meet Fiona.She really was beautiful,she had a body you see with Victoria Secrets models,blue eyes and.. a terrible personality.At the party while we were introduced,she was down right arrogant. "Fiona I'd like you to meet Riley,Eva's nephew,Riley Fiona,my girlfriend,"Frank warmly introduced us."Hi Fiona,"I greeted her while extending my hand.She all but ignored my hand and went on with texting away. Frank actually seemed embarrassed by the situation,I could do nothing but take my hand back and say"nice to meet you Fiona"while smiling at Frank trying to tell him it was ok.Good enough he was able to understand the message and smiled in return as I went to mingle with the other guests. I tried to tell myself that Fiona was probably relaying urgent information when we were being introduced but as the evening went by I resolved that she was just being rude.When talking with other people I noticed there were those she spoke with well,Steve and Eva for example but when she talked to some others..well let's just say there wasn't much talking on her part. Frank later came to apologize for Fiona's conduct,"Sorry for what happened with Fiona""You don't have to apologize for anything,she must have been busy,anyway I'd like to congratulate you on your graduation and wish you success in your endeavours""Thank you Riley,everything going well with school?""Yeah,everything's great""Well that's good to hear, Later on before Frank started working he began spending a lot of time with his family.That meant I got to see him more and more which was just fine with me.At first we'd go to movies all of us together then later we had picnics and if we were "lucky enough" Fiona would grace us with her presence.At these times though,Fiona was cordial enough to me but as soon as Steve and eva stepped out,she'd go back to bitch mode. I was very confused with what Frank saw in her,ok she was pretty and all but her personality took away all the beauty one saw.I guess if I was straight I'd be able to see what he saw in her but since I was not I bit my tongue and treated her as well as I could. Something else that discombobulated me was how hypocritical she was,I mean why was she saving face and acting all nice to certain people and acting like a bitch to everyone else.I noticed however how everyone she treated nicely was close to Frank. I approached Eva one day with this question and I was shocked by how vehemently Eva came to Fiona's defence,"Riley don't you think it's your feelings for Frank that have clouded your judgement?""No they haven't,at first I thought it was so but you really have to see how she gets when you guys are not around""I've known Fiona longer than you have and the Fiona I know is a sweet and humble girl..Riley stop acting so shocked and close your mouth" "What's more,what did I tell you about Frank,get ideas of you two together out of your head and even if something were to happen he's way older than you""He's just six years older and I am not saying this because of Frank""Really?!so it just happens you like the boy and coincidentally hate the girlfriend?""I don't hate her,all I'm saying is...well you know what,I'm sorry you're right,my judgement of her was flawed"I relented knowing fully well there was no way I was going to win that argument."Hmph!"she replied to my statement clearly exprssing her disappointment. When I had first arrived in the States,I was unfamiliar with what my dad would call secular music.It was prohibited to listen to any music that wasn't Gospel,but thankfully I came across a lot of music in my new home.Most of it was music from the 70s,80s and early 90's.I liked the music more than what was contemporary.Since I was deprived of it,I tried every genre I could and liked almost all of them. This was to be a good thing since Frank and I ended up liking the same music,it was so good that we could just at times enjoying each others company while the sweet voice of Whitney Houston took us to the heavens and back. It was sweet to see this man who was all man get in touch with emotions and let the sweet music move him.It was weird though he didn't listen to music like that with anyone else,I guess that made me feel special knowing I was the only one who he'd let see in his vulnerability. "Saving All My Love For You" was one of my favourites and one day when we were listening to it,I looked at Frank who had his eyes closed and was being moved and mouthed the lyrics of the song to him.Of course my message was out of hte song's context but when the chorus came I could relate to giving all my love to this man. Two years had past since my arrival in the States .Frank for one had moved to Florida and I no longer saw him at all,this really was a bit painful not being able to see him anymore,but my right hand was still subjected to pleasing myself with the memory of him as I still remembered every inch of him perfectly. His perfect dimples that formed when he smiled to reveal his teeth,the sparkle in his blue eyes. I was hopelessly in love with a straight man and I tried telling myself that I needed to snap out of this infatuation,but I could not and the fact that he was so far away did not alleviate the pain. The only good news was that Frank called oftenly and even spoke to me about how he and Fiona were doing,Fiona normally spoke to Steve and Eva in case she was with Frank when he was calling,we never spoke since I don't think she even remembered my name. For my sixteenth birthday,Eva and Steve surprised me by buying me a car,I couldn't believe how generous they were,I hugged them both and thanked them kissing them both on the cheek,actually for the first time I think I saw Steve blush and Eva guffawed at the situation. Sean,Daniel and Claire were also there as well,I was so happy to be with my family and friends and all that was missing was the man my heart craved for. Just then I heard a familiar voice from behind me shout"Happy Birthday!"and sure enough when I turned around there he was,standing in all his glory as if by magic with his beautiful smile and a gift in his hands and just as I was about to hug him,I saw her.If it wasn't for the love I felt for Frank being greater than the detest I'd grown toward this woman,my jovial mood might have changed,however that was not to be the case. "Frank!?"I shouted in dibelief,"What a nice surprise and thank you for the gift,"I said trying not to sound over excited."Hey it's nothing and i have a feeling you'll like it"he said while I inspected the nice box I was given. "Happy Birthday Riley,"Fiona said with a warm smile extending her arm and passing on a gift.For a moment I just froze and sared at heer completely dumbfounded.I had no idea she even knew my name."Um,thank you Fiona,"I said some what still surprised.Had she changed during her stay in Florida,just as I was asking myself the question I heard her greet Steve and Eva warmly.Of course,it finally clicked she was still ingratiating. "With the way you talked about her,I thought Fiona was the ice queen,"Sean remarked as we were talking out in the patio."Yeah Riley,how come yet she seemed so nice"Claire supporting Sean's statement."I really don't know what to tell you guys,she's never as nice to me as she was today,heck she never even spoke to me till now,I just think she did it because of Eva and Steve.""I know what you mean Riles,I've seen people like that,I know what you mean,"Daniel spoke up."Thanks Danny,and I didn't think you two would be the ones to doubt me""We don't doubt you,we just thought it was very ironic how nice she was compared to the conceited person you described to us,"Claire explained. My gift from Frank was Madonna's Immaculate Collection,I loved and cherished his gift.Fiona had given me socks,in her defence at least the socks were comfy. Summer of that year I got a job at restaurant as a waiter.My job wasn't hard,I worked great shifts and it paid good money added with the tips I had enough money.The assistant manager was cute too. Tony was his name.He was a beautiful black man.Pearl white teeth,masculine in every way and unfortunately straight as well,or atleast I thought.I didn't understand what my attraction to straight men was.I couldn't help but stare at him when he talked to me.I kept telling myself to stop dreaming and get my act together but found myself still looking at his face,wondering how his lips would feel pressed against mine. Apart from his good looks Tony never really had anything much to show in terms of character.He wasn't the meanest to work with but he was very crude when conversing outside of work.If anything he just kept an official appearance when the boss was around. The both of us were just casual friends at work and our conversations really never went far into personal stuff.I would be lying if I said I didn't want us to know each other personally.In my mind I knew that I had no chance with Frank so I fel getting to know Tony wouldn't be such a bad thing and if it turned out he liked me as much as I liked him then we could as our shift was over,Tony invited me to his house.He was so kind and sweet with me so I couldn't refuse.We went back to his place,he got some beer while he gave me a coke.It was neat and almost spartan. We were watching and talking about anything and everything.He was asking me about school while we were watching t.v.We were watching an ESPN special what it was about I don't remember all I know is that those basketball were getting me hot and bothered. As the programme we were watching ended,Tony started browsing for something else to watch he came across a soft porn channel and stopped.I almost stopped breathing as I saw the arousing scene on the telly unfolding. "You okay with this Riley?"Tony asked looking at me,I quickly nodded my head yes and he laughed at my reaction.The main reason I was so drawn to it was because of the man on the screen,he was bald,muscular and hung.I never had seen anyone else's dick in a state of arousal before and I never went out to look for porn so to say I was inexperienced would have been an understatement. Looking towards Tony I could see his hand inside his shorts which only aroused me more.For a moment I could hardly breath,as I saw Tony moving his hand inside his shorts. "You ever jerk off Riley?""Yeah,"I answered shyly."No need to worry,hey look" he said dropping his shorts and boxers only to leave his erect penis swaying in the air.I gasped as I looked at him,or it. He stood and came to where I was seating,dick swinging and said "I've been seeing the way you look at me at work,hey don't worry it's ok,"he said"You like me and I think you're cute too so we could help each other out"He was now holding my arm drawing me to the couch.Still dumbfounded he removed his shirt to reveal his chest. "You can touch,go on don't be shy,"he urged me as I began to touch his pec and chest.It was all so new to me,all those days I was dreaming of doing this and here I was.I began twisting his nipples which caused him to mourn,and lowered my trembling hands to his well endowed manhood.I know I was six inches at the time but Tony was large,maybe eight inches if I had to guess. As I stroked his cock I got more courageous,hearing the moans emitted by Tony.Soon I was stroking him quickly as my left hand played with his balls and I cpuld hear him breathing hard.I was in awe of his cock and I went touching it and just drinking in the male beauty that was Tony as his masculine scent bathed the room. After some time he stopped me,"take it slow babe,I'm really close".I smiled as I heard him calling me babe."I think you should kiss Tony Junior,"he said.I kissed the tip,licking the precum that had collected itself.I heard him hiss and mourn as I continued licking and sucking at the head.I then took the entire head into my mouth and started sucking it like a lolly as Tony continued mourning and mourning louder. Just then I realised how much I liked sucking dick.The taste of it,the musky smell of him,the feel of his dick on my tongue,hearing his mourning and the sight of Tony's face in pure bliss had me harder than I'd ever been.If there was ever a doubt I had of being gay,of which I hadn't then at that time I was convinced I really was.I decided to take more of the big thing but gagged at first. "Go slow,you're doing great as it is"he cooed.I renewed my efforts failing thrice but at last I felt his pubes tickling my nose.Tony moaned so loudly,and judging by his breathing I could tell he was close so I renewed my efforts and sucked even harder. Tony didn't last long after that as volumes of his thick juice shot into my throat chocking me at first but I somehow managed to swallow most of it.The force of his semen hitting the back of my throat was nothing like I'd experienced before.When he finished he got up and told me to jerk myself off. It didn't take me long and I achieved an amazing orgasm.After that an awkward silence ensued and I wished he would do more,maybe even kiss me but after seeing nothing remotely romantic happening I asked to leave. Walking back home,I battled with thoughts in my head and emotions in my heart.Was what I did wrong?I know I used to tell myself sex wasn't wrong if done with love but I felt no love for Tony.I was in lust with him that's for sure,and what we did was consensual I wasn't forced into it.How I wished it was Frank who was my first sexual encounter,but I sucked it up."Don't be foolish,take what you get Riley"I told myself."Maybe Tony will love you someday and it would be easy for you to love him".But inside I knew this was not true.