by Andrew J
This story is pure fiction. If you are not 18 or older, please leave immediately.
Do not continue reading. Also, if gay male sex isn't
your thing, you might want to stop here. Otherwise, enjoy!
If you liked this story, please let me know. All comments and feedback are welcome. DO NOT email me if you are under 18 years of age. Andrew J (Email: email@example.com; Yahoo IM: andrewbjo)
“You OK, buddy?” Dan asked as he led me by the hand into our room. We were at a tiny motel in Brooklyn, basically what the cab driver could help us find after 2 AM.
There we were, my big brother and I, alone, together, both wanting to be away from his girlfriend and my boyfriend. I was still higher than a kite, and my whole body was surging with happiness and pleasure. I vaguely remember calling Tom while we were in the cab, and babbling incessantly about what a good time Dan and I were having. I told him about the dancing, and all the men, and how happy Dan was, and about us wanting to have brothers-only time, and told Tom I missed him terribly. Tom just listened, asked to make sure we were OK, and told me to have a good time. He told me he missed me too, and said he’d see us the next day.
“Yeah, I’m OK,” I said feebly, watching my big brother get undressed. I started getting out of my clothes too, and naked, we both collapsed onto the bed.
“C’mere, buddy,” Dan said, his arms wide open. I snuggled up to his side, and he hugged me close. His cool, slightly sweaty skin felt good against mine, as I was feeling really flush.
I stared into his beautiful eyes. His face was radiant, and I could tell he was pretty high too. I love you, Dan. I love you I love you I love you.
“Hey buddy, you know how much I love you, right?” Dan said.
I held him tightly, and nodded.
“I mean, this isn’t just the ecstacy, OK? I mean, you’re my baby brother, and I love you more than anything and I’ll never let anything happen to you, OK?”
I held him tighter, and mustered a bit of a nod. I felt tears welling in my eyes.
“You wanna know something?” Dan said, putting his hand on my chin.
I looked up at him. He looked back at me with earnest eyes, and held me tighter.
“You’re the most important person in the whole world to me, OK? Even more important than mom or dad or Jen or anyone. Noone else understands me like you do.”
I love you too Dan, I wanted to say, but no words came. I felt a few tears trickle down my cheek, and opened my mouth. “I… I…”
“I know, buddy,” Dan said, as he held my head against his chest.
As my big bro held me and I pressed up close to him, I suddenly realized that we were both naked. I could feel every ridge of his chest and torso, and his strong, hairy legs against mine. His cock was pressed up against my abs, and mine against his thighs, as we held each other in lock embrace. I felt intensely aroused. But it wasn’t the usual kind of horny arousal. It was like there was a stream of unspeakably intense arousal flowing from the most private and intimate center of my being to Dan, and I was receiving the same from him. I didn’t even have an erection, but the intense feelings I had were better than any erection I’d ever had.
“I, I love you too, Dan.” I said finally.
“Let’s get under the covers,” Dan said, pulling the blankets aside and getting underneath them. I followed suite.
We held each other that way for a long while, and chatted about all kinds of things. Mostly our childhoods.
“Hey I got a call from Rick last week,” Dan said. “He said you guys hooked up the last time you were in Madison.”
Rick was Dan’s best friend in high school. He was a year younger than Dan, and they were sports buddies and had a band together. I knew Rick well because he was my first gay experience, and also my first boyfriend. We started fooling around together when I was 13. Rick was 15 at the time, and hung out with Dan after school almost every day. We didn’t stop fooling around until Dan moved away to college, which was 3 years after that. Whenever I go back to Madison to visit my parents I give Rick a call and if he’s around we get together.
“Yeah, I saw him” I said, blushing a bit.
“You two were like animals when you were kids. You guys had sex like every day!” Dan said. Dan was completely in on our secret, and would let us use his bedroom to have sex after school and in the evenings. Our parents would have killed me if they knew what was going on, but Dan didn’t care. So while Rick and I were fucking like jackrabbits in his room, Dan would sit in my room doing his homework and wait for us to get done.
“Dan? Thanks, man…” I said.
Reading my mind, Dan said, “For what? Don’t worry about it man, made me happy to know my baby bro was getting laid.”
There were many times Dan protected us at school too, and would put up fight if anyone said or suggested anything was going on with Rick and me. Dan mostly protected me, because Rick was pretty tough and could hold his own. I was the wimp.
“Dan, remember how you used to get into a lot of fights at school cuz of me?”
“Naw, not really. Some of those guys had it coming to them anyways. Had nothing to do with you, buddy!”
Dan pulled me up so I was lying on top of him. I placed my head on his shoulder, and felt the stubble on his jaw against my nose. Every part of our bodies were aligned… his nipples grazed mine, my crotch rested directly above his, and my feet caressed his as I stretched them. I could even feel his heartbeat against mine.
I gave Dan a kiss on his neck, and he smiled, ruffling my hair, drawing my head closer to his. We were both tripping – feeling intense emotions, both happiness and melancholy ebb and flow inside of us. We lay like that, silently, in each others arms, for a long while.
“So, mom and dad. They did the best they could, OK?” Dan said, finally.
Geez, do we have to talk about mom and dad? Dad was an alcoholic. The worst sort of alcoholic – the sort that was a widely respected academic and revered member of our church. His alcoholism was something kept tightly under wraps, and the “best” of it was shared only with his family. Mom, Dan and me. I remember my parents’ constant fights, and when Dan was old enough, Dan’s fights with my dad. Dad was a homophobe to the core, and getting caught being gay always scared the shit out of me.
“Naw, they didn’t, Dan.” I said, tensing up. In my mind I continued - And when we grew up, you told them you were the queer one. To save my skin. And I could never bring myself to say thank you, or to apologize, for what you had to go through.
Memories of that winter night when I was 14 came flooding back. Dan and I had just gotten home from the movies. Dad, who was drunk as usual, confronted us with a magazine he’d found that day in the garage. It was a gay porn magazine. He wanted to know whose it was. Which of his two boys was a fucking queer. To this day my insides turn to jelly as I recall that moment. Unflinching, Dan said it was his. Time stood still. I’ve never seen so much rage in anyone’s eyes as I saw in Dad’s at that instant. His right fist landed on Dan’s face, and after he fell to the ground, Dad kicked him in the stomach, twice. I stood by and watched, not even weakly protesting. In fact, I recall feeling relieved, a feeling I will forever carry with me and forever feel guilty for. When Dan got up, Dad pushed him out the door, not even giving him time to put on his coat. Into the freezing-cold Madison winter night. Dan walked twelve blocks to our cousin’s place and spent the night there.
Mom and Dad didn’t let him back in the house for 2 days. Dad was determined to never let him in ever again. Not even mom budged for the first two days. And I cried in my room, scared I’d be next. And for knowing that Dan stood up for my sake, to protect me. Yet again.
I started sobbing, quietly at first, then more loudly. I held Dan tightly.
“Hey buddy, don’t think about all that shit right now. It’s OK. Here,” Dan said, and rocked me, kissing me and holding me.
“Dan, I --” I’m sorry. I’m sorry.
“It’s OK, buddy. It all turned out good. Look at us now, OK?” Dan said. He gently caressed my back with his fingers as he held me on top of him. My tears slowly subsided, and I lay quietly, enjoying Dan’s touch.
“What a buzz killer all that crying shit was, man!” Dan said, smiling and lightly smacking me on the head.
I had to smile at that, despite my tears. We were both still pretty buzzed, and Dan was right, the crying was bringing us way down.
“Remember how when we were little Dad would sit us on his knees and gentle-tickle our backs when he watched TV?”
“Yeah… vaguely,” I said. I was really little when Dad did that.
“Well, it feels like my buddy here could use some gentle-tickling.”
Saying that, Dan got up from underneath me and sat up, leaning against the head of the bed. He pulled me up to a seated position and into him, with my head leaning against his shoulder, and my back pressed up against his torso. Dan kissed me on the cheek, and slowly started tickling my chest. It felt really good. He used the lightest of touch with all his fingers outstretched, and made slow lines and circles over my pecs, shoulders and abs. My skin was awakening with the sensations, the goosebumps, and the coolness of being exposed.
“That feel good, buddy?”
“Mmm…” I responded, leaning into him more. Wanting to be as open as I could to his touch, I arched my back and spread my legs a little.
Dan encircled my legs with his stronger ones, and I could feel the hair on his legs chafe the hair on mine as he gently spread my legs apart. I felt completely exposed and vulnerable -- and safe, in Dan’s firm but gentle grip. He continued tickling me, making larger and larger circles, and longer and longer lines. They covered my waist, my groin and down to my thighs. I almost jumped when he reached my sensitive inner thighs. My soft, down-like hairs there were standing on end to Dan’s ministrations.
As he gentle-tickled me, he kissed me, and talked to me about nothing in particular. He recounted stories from when we were kids, mostly happy ones, and stories from his college days, most of which I’d heard but was glad to hear again. Our highs were getting a bit tempered by our exhaustion, and I was beginning to get pretty tired.
My mind wandered back to the time in our lives when Dan left home for college. I was almost 16, and desperately wanted him not to leave home. It would be the end of everything for me. I would never see Rick again, and I was petrified of being at home all alone with my parents and noone to look out for me. Dan had gotten admission to pretty much every school he’d applied to, including of course, the University of Wisconsin, right at home in Madison. I hated him for moving away, even though it was only to Milwaukee. Dad never forgave him for not going to Madison, the school he’d been to and had taught at all his career. For different reasons, I never forgave him either. In fact, I took it personally. Life at home was never the same after Dan was gone.
Dan stopped tickling me and rested his hands on my inner thighs. His fingers were almost, but not quite, touching my balls.
“Your big bro’s getting kinda tired, buddy,” he said. He rested his head on my shoulder, and I could feel the warmth from his face, and his body up against my own.
I didn’t move. I didn’t want this to end, ever. I felt safe and loved and protected and happy, in ways I’d never felt in my entire life.
After Dan left home, I stopped seeing Rick, and stopped doing anything remotely gay. My dad’s drinking increased, as did his expectations of me. His first son had let him down, and now I was his last feeble hope. I promptly stepped back into the closet, slammed the door shut, and focused on my schoolwork. I got straight As in every class, and breezed into UW Madison. During that period I was lonely and isolated. Life at home was miserable. I visited Dan in Milwaukee every chance I got, which was almost every weekend once I got my own car. And then he left Wisconsin for good.
Dan started rubbing my tummy. “Hey what’s wrong, buddy?” he asked.
“Nothing,” I said.
“You’re thinking about when I was in Milwaukee and shit, right?” he asked. Damn how could he read my mind.
“I really missed you, Dan,” I said. “There were days I wanted to just run away from home and move in with you.”
He held me tightly against him in a bear hug. I could feel his strong chest and firm abs against my back. I looked down at my own abs, which were soft. I felt embarrassed and ashamed.
“Well, I’m not going anywhere anymore, OK? Do a killer job at Northwestern this semester, then get your ass over to New York and we’ll be together again. K?”
I nodded, feeling better.
Dan started tickling me again. He started making longer strokes, from my shoulders all the way down to as far as he could reach on my thighs, and then circle upwards again. Taking a deep breath, I started melting into the sensations, and letting go of all my worries. The happiness started surging in me again. I closed my eyes, and rest my head on Dan’s shoulder behind me.
Then all of a sudden his fingers grazed my balls. It was like a jolt of high-voltage pleasure went through me. My whole body violently jerked and I let out a loud moan.
“Whoa!” Dan said. “You liked that, huh?” he said, smiling.
Then, he force spread my legs apart wider, firmly holding them down with his legs entwined around them. I could feel a cool draft on my ballsac, and the delicate skin below it. He took my arms and put them behind his head, so I was embracing him and pulling him closer to me. My armpits were now completely exposed, as was the rest of my arched torso.
He slowly started tickling me again. Long, deliberate, even strokes, all over my body. Including, in fact focusing on, the parts he’d missed the last time. My armpits, my inner arms, my inner thighs, and my testicles. I was writhing around with pleasure and moaning. My legs were completely immobilized by his legs entwined around them, and my hands were behind his head. When he tickled my armpits, I yanked them in which had the effect of pulling his head closer into my shoulder.
“uuhhhh….mmmmhhhh…” I moaned. I started weeping in pleasure as Dan took complete control of my body and all my pleasure points. Tears were streaming down my cheeks as my big brother touched my body, my most private parts, in ways noone had ever touched me before.
As my big brother tickled me, he started kissing me. On the neck, then on my cheek. I was too far gone to be of any help, and he couldn’t reach my mouth, so he kept kissing my cheek.
“You like this, little guy? You like your big bro kissing you and holding you?”
More moans, more tears from me.
“You like it when I play with my little buddy here?” Dan asked, drawing feather light circles on my testicles with his fingers.
Yes Yes please never stop I said, but no words came. Just incoherent moans, getting louder, and tears.
“My little buddy,” Dan said. His tickles had turned into long strokes with his hands, and I felt more drawn into him than ever.
“Here, lie down,.” Dan lay me down, and lay beside me. I looked up at him as he stared into my eyes. Sometimes when I looked at Dan I felt like I was looking into a mirror. Sometimes I felt like I was looking at something far more handsome and beautiful than I could ever be. I felt the latter at that moment. I felt tiny, meek and submitted completely to my big brother.
I love you Dan.
“I know buddy. I love you too,” Dan replied, even though I hadn’t said anything.
Then my big bro started caressing me again. It’s funny, because I didn’t feel his caresses this time. Not in the same way. As I stared into his beautiful eyes, I felt a blissful glow on the inside of my body.
Dan got on top of me. His body was cool, and he drew the blankets over us. He held my head with one arm, and circled my torso with the other. He stared straight into my eyes. Dan’s eyes looked wired but at the same time exhausted.
“Do you love your big bro, little guy?”
I nodded. I could smell his breath, a mixture of chewing gum and alcohol, and his body musk in the air hanging right above me. I involuntarily spread my legs apart, and slowly wrapped them around him. And I put my arms around his strong shoulders, so I was holding him tightly into me. His whole body weight now rested on my torso.
“Kinda like me with Jen, huh?” Dan said. “Or you with Tom.” He teasingly rocked his hips back and forth into mine, as he stared into my eyes. I raised my legs on his back, and held him tighter and more desperately.
His stubble, now harsher than it was last night, was grazing my jaw as he whispered in my ear. “Would you like that, buddy? Would you like me to fuck you like you were Jen?”
I meekly looked into Dan's eyes, afraid and unable to say anything. Intense happiness, arousal and love was all I knew at that instant.
And then, without warning, he kissed me on the lips. Gently at first, but then fully. I felt his tongue inside me, against my tongue, exploring my mouth. I was too dumbfounded and helpless to react or participate or do anything but just lie there and hold him. He moved his head around, sideways and up, as he probed my mouth. I could smell and taste his breath in my mouth, something I'd never done before. His tongue was strong and thick, and explored every recess of my mouth, my gums, and the area below my tongue. It was soft yet firm, and the kiss felt better than any kiss I'd ever had in my life. In fact, than any sexual experience of any kind. His saliva leaked into my mouth, and my own tongue, which seemed to be half the length and have barely half the strength of his, and willingly submitted to his domination. I sucked on his tongue and held on to it for life, desperately opening my mouth and throat and my entire being so he could go deeper. A stream of lightening was surging through me. I was a slave to my brother's kiss and surrendered all control of my body and being to him.
I can’t explain what happened next. To say I came would be partially true. But it was different from any orgasm I’d ever had. I wasn’t aware of my cock, or of my erection, or of the thick, hot fluild that pumped out of me, or of my body jerking around so violently that Dan was practically knocked off of me onto my side. I was aware only of the tidal wave of emotion and love, pent up inside since early that evening, that burst forth, out from every nook and corner of my body through my cock. My body contractions lasted for a long time, and I lay there, helpless to do anything but moan and shout until it passed. “Mmmh…. Uuughhh…” I felt like my entire body was shooting through my cock.
I must have stopped breathing or something, because when I gradually came to, Dan was lying by my side, with a loving but concerned look in his eyes, holding me.
When I finally smiled up at him, he said, “Whoa! What the hell was that!”
We both laughed. He looked at the mess I’d made, all over myself and all over him, and laughed some more.
“Little fucker,” he said, laughing, wiping the cum off him and onto my face.
I laughed so hard my sides started hurting. I took some of my cum and wiped it back on him. He wrestled me down, and, wiping more off of him, shoved his finger into my mouth. I gagged as he force fed me my own cum. He was laughing really hard too. It was a blissful moment.
After horsing around for a while, exhausted, Dan lay down beside me, and I curled up next to him.
“I love you, big bro,” I said, squeezing him tightly.
“I know you do, buddy. I love you too, more than anything,” he said. We lay like that for a while, drifting in and out of sleep.
For the first time I noticed daylight streaming in through the window. It was already Saturday morning. I was completely exhausted. Realizing Dan hadn’t cum yet, I weakly caressed his chest in a attempt at stimulating him. I moved my hand lower, towards his groin. It occurred to me that I’d never before touched Dan’s cock with the intent of getting him off. That had always been off limits, right back from when we started the Kneeling Thing as kids.
As I reached his lower abs, he gently took hold of my hand. Bringing it up to his mouth, he kissed it, and then held it at his mouth for a while. He then pulled my head against his chest with one arm and hugged me close to him with the other. As we lay like that, I felt his fingers grip my head harder, and his heartbeat change. I sensed that Dan’s trip was returning him to another melancholic, emotional state.
“Yeah.” I said, kissing his chest.
“I’m sorry, OK?”
“Huh? For what?” I asked, slightly more alert.
“I’m sorry for letting you down. I’m sorry I’m not –” He paused.
I completed his sentence in my head. I don’t know how, but I knew exactly what he was trying to say. I gently squeezed his hand, and kissed his cheek.
He continued, “I mean, if I was, it would be more fun for you, and, and I’d make it more fun for you, and we’d, we’d do it all the time. I can’t do it, buddy. Even that kiss just now. It doesn’t feel right somehow. Like something’s missing. No matter how hard I try. I -,” And he fell quiet.
When I looked up at him, I noticed a few tears rolling down my big brother’s cheek.
“Buddy, I feel like a failure. I mean, you’re the most important guy in the world to me, and I can’t make you happy. I know how much you get off on me but I – I need different stuff. I mean, if I was into guys I’d do it with you all the time. When we were young I used to hate Rick, and some days I feel so jealous of Tom. How come I can’t be that to you. I wish – ”
I held Dan close to me, and kissed him. “You’re perfect, Dan. You’re my big bro and my hero. You can’t be any better no matter what.” And I meant it.
Dan sniffled. “I love you, buddy.”
“I love you too, Dan,” I said. And we both drifted off to sleep.
We slept for about an hour.
We were suddenly awaken by the smell of coffee and a familiar voice ringing in our ears.
“Good morning!” Tom said. “Geez, don’t you guys lock the door!? This is Brooklyn, guys… and a dumpy part of Brooklyn at that. It’s MY neighborhood.” He laughed loudly. “You two Manhattan boys are gonna get killed out here! I mean, you guys SMELL like cash. Anyways, I brought you coffee and muffins! Waky! Waky!” All chipper and cheerful, a mile a minute.
“Tom, how did you know where –,” I mumbled, not even getting up.
“Don’t you remember calling me last night? You told me all about your night and where you were staying and everything! In fact, you said a lot of sweet things to me.” He came over to me and, beaming, whispered into my ear, “Boyfriend!”
“And I brought you guys a change of shirts.” He held up two matching grey t-shirts. “Don’t wanna look like Friday night fags on Saturday morning!” He laughed.
Dan was still lying in bed, barely awake, as was I.
“I’m glad you guys had fun last night. I had a blast with Jen. We totally connected.” He babbled on. I was beginning to get a headache from all the morning energy.
“ – we rented some DVDs, ordered in pizza, ice cream – ”
“Ice cream?” I said, incoherently.
“- we’re going clothes shopping this afternoon. Jen needs new outfits for – ”
At this Dan perked up ever so slighly. “You’re taking her shopping?”
“Oh yeah. She hates shopping with you, so I suggested – ”
“Dude, you’re my hero!” Dan said groggily.
I just lay there, too tired for words. Glad as I was to see Tom, I was thoroughly annoyed his perkiness. Didn’t he realize Dan and I had been awake all night?
“But first, we’re going to have brunch at my place. All of us. You guys get to meet my 3 crazy roommates. They’re cooking. Well, Tanya’s cooking. Brendan and Valerie don’t cook, thankfully. Jen’s already over there. By the way, Dan you’re in big trouble man!” Tom laughed.
He wouldn’t stop.
“– Jen was sooo funny! We got stoned, and watched repeats of –”
Finally, unable to stand the incessant babbling any more, Dan sat up.
“Dude, first, shut the fuck up. Second, take your clothes off and third, get into bed and give me a back rub. I’ve been up all fucking night.”
Tom stopped talking abruptly, a bit taken aback. He looked over towards me questioningly. I looked back at him and nodded with my eyes. I was too tired to actually move my head.
Tom obediently shut up, undressed and got into bed. He lay between us, naked, and massaged Dan’s back. I snuggled up to him, and inhaled that familiar Tom smell I’d grown addicted to over the last week. I reached down and felt his cock growing. Massaging Dan had that effect on him. I wondered if he’d jerked off last night.
“Last time was Friday morning with you,” Tom said to me. Damn, how was everyone reading my mind today.
“You guys are both coated with cum. What did I miss?” Tom asked.
“It’s all your boyfriend's. I didn’t get off,” Dan said half asleep.
Tom looked at me admonishingly. How could you, his eyes asked.
I guiltily looked away, and started drifting off to sleep again. I was glad Tom was around. I figured Tom could kneel for Dan, or somehow get Dan off. They didn’t need me.
And I wasn’t wrong about that. Long after I’d drifted off to sleep, I briefly surfaced from my slumber to hear Dan grunting, followed by muffled moans from Tom. That meant that Dan had just gotten off, and Tom was kneeling, or the horizontal equivalent, and had gotten off himself too. It will be very useful to have Tom around, I thought.
Almost immediately Dan scrambled up to my side and spooned me. He put his strong arms around me, and I felt his post-orgasmic breathing against my back. His cock was still wet and I felt his cum rub against my ass. It felt nice.
“Can I hold you for a while, handsome?” he whispered into my ear. I moved into him closer in response. Tom slowly caressed my body as he held me. Dan began lightly snoring beside us.
And, lying in my beautiful boyfriend’s arms, it wasn’t long before I followed Dan into a peaceful slumber.
To be continued...
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-- Andrew J (Email: firstname.lastname@example.org; Yahoo IM: andrewbjo)
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