Skip – Part 18
So now we have a saved life, a perfectly wonderful young man to add to our circle of love and caring. He had been shown how to love, including losing his cherry happily to David. But he lost more than that. He lost hate. He lost his hate for himself as well. He gained a brand new life, and he would eventually not look back.
He finally, officially, met Skip one weekend on campus. He gave Skip a loving hug and an equally loving kiss.
"Thank you, for my life. Wait, I know what you're going to say. But you gave love to Aaron. Aaron started something beautiful at school. I would be dead, Skip, if it had never started with you."
"I can't take the credit, as much as you want me to have it. It belongs to all of the boys, of which I am but one. We love, deeply."
"Okay, I accept that. But you will always hold a special place for me. Sometime, when we can do it, I want to be part of you four. Aaron, David, and I are three, but I want to be part of you and Billy. I dunno, does that sound too weird?"
"It sounds like you want to return some of the love you've been given. That's not weird. We will welcome you to our home. Come with Billy next time he goes home."
Skip kissed Sam, enjoying the young man's lips. He knew that I had a hand in teaching the boy to kiss, because Sam did not shove his tongue into Skip's mouth. I really don't know why guys do that. We loved lips and a little tongue, not TONGUE! He also looked Skip in the eye as he talked, both to listen to him, and to see the love that lived there. The love was more meaningful eye-to-eye, which became heart-to-heart.
School was also an improvement in Sam. He went from an average student to a brilliant boy. He wanted to earn the tuition that was given so freely as his gift. After mid-term exams, he held a 3.6 GPA, up from his best of 3.25. Patrick also improved from a 3.0 last year to a 3.6 just in the first semester. The study groups taught him discipline and better note taking. The cumulative GPA's would continue to increase as well. Patrick did not lack for love, either. Our relationships had improved his relationship with his girlfriend. He says he listens to her better and talks honestly, like when she might be bugging him. He can tell her so, honestly and respectfully.
Another benefit was that Sam liked jacking off with him, instead of the boys doing their jacking off in the showers. They jacked each other off, not just themselves. They usually shot their loads into each other's mouths, since Sam had learned not to waste it. Patrick was surprised that cum was not nasty.
Sam talked to Billy alone one night. Billy had been waiting for this, because he wanted it too. Sam explained that he had to make up for his past sins. Making love to Billy would be the way to put it in the past. Billy kissed Sam, appreciating that he meant something to him.
Was there a limit to how many he would want to love? Truly, yes. Sam would be the fourth of the four. With more, the guys, including Sam, felt their closeness would suffer. Sam is the perfect addition to their inner circle, though. Most of the time, he would be a strong two with David.
Skip felt the same way, but he was not ready for four, yet, because of Billy wanted. Billy was ready because Sam was there, close by, wanting to be on the A-Team. Eventually there were be a real two—Sam and David. We three will still be three, and an informal five.
Ste told the boys that they should bunk together for the night. Or for the weekend if they wanted to. Ste said he'd be fine to be with Patrick at his dorm at the end of the evenings.
The rest of the boys knew that Sam and Billy would make peace tonight, in their way. They all gave both boys hugs and kisses before they went to bed.
Billy let Sam lead the way. Billy undressed Sam, slowly, and started to undress himself.
"No, let me. I want to see you for myself."
He took off Billy's polo shirt while kissing him. He touched Billy's skin lightly with his fingers.
"That tickles, love. You surprise me. You're very gentle. How?"
"Three guesses and the first two don't count."
"Ah, friend Aaron."
"You got the best of both then, Sam. I have to tell you, even though I don't want to, that I still feel more pity for you then almost anything else."
"What else do you feel, in the `almost anything else'?"
"Love. Lust, too."
"I know it's okay to feel both, as long as they are both. Love overrules sex."
"Do you love me?" asked Billy.
"If not right this moment, then tonight, and for life."
"You're so sweet. I'm sad for you. You were thrown away like yesterday's trash. I don't get it."
"But you get me, so I'm finally okay with that. They wanted to make me not gay, but they made me more gay, because I love David. And Aaron was my first time, you know. I couldn't keep my hands off him, to be honest."
"I know the feeling."
"David didn't get mad that I wanted to be inside of Aaron. He even kissed me when he finished his shower. And they taught me something new besides."
"Which is? ..."
Sam kissed Billy again. He took off Billy's socks, and then unbuttoned and unzipped his jeans, pulling them off. Billy was commando as usual. He was lying across his bed. Sam knelt in front of him and then raised Billy's legs. He licked across Billy's pink pucker. He knew Billy would be clean, even at the end of the day. He licked expertly, because he had practiced on David over the past couple of days.
Billy moaned. "Nice, bro. Very nice."
This encouraged Sam to put his tongue into Billy's hole. Billy shuddered. After a few minutes, Billy had to stop.
"Careful bro. That's enough to set me off. Lemme do it to you."
Sam took Billy's place on the bed. Billy raised Sam's legs and ate out Sam's hole. Sam tasted of fresh soap and of a light musk that was pleasing. He took it slow so he could enjoy the taste of Sam's pucker. After Sam shuddered, as Billy had done, Billy sucked one of Sam's balls into his mouth. He rolled it around, released it, and then sucked the other one. He licked the shaft of Sam's hard shaft and then teased the head. He continued licking up Sam's belly, into his navel, up his chest, and over to each nipple. He licked and bit both of Sam's nipples, making Sam moan again. He kissed Sam's neck, nibbled on his ear lobe, and then lay down on Sam, kissing him very smoothly.
"Wow, nobody showed me that. I wouldn't have dreamed about. If I want to do that to David, would you be mad?"
"No way. David loves that. What you learn, you can pass on, if you like it enough. I bet you can even improve upon it along the way."
"I'm glad you found me when I was hiding. I thought, in a daydream, that you might, but I was only dreaming."
"You're not dreaming now. You're a brilliant boy, Sam. I care about you very much. I do love you, too, for much more than just being naked with you. But since we're naked ..."
"I have a new favorite number," said Sam, smiling at Billy.
"What a coincidence. So do I."
They got into a sixty-nine and went down on each other's very hard cocks. Sam loved sucking, almost as much as his buddies being inside him. He thought about Skip."
"Aww, bro, that's just not right!" said Sam, slipping off Billy's cock.
"What. I don't know how to suck your cock any other way."
"No, not that. That's right, and then some. I have Skip on my mind. I was thinking about being fucked, that Skip hasn't done it yet, but I want him to. You haven't even fucked me yet. It's just not fair to think about someone else."
"Why not? Skip's a great person to think about. I do it all the time."
"While making love to someone else?"
"Sometimes. But Skip and Aaron and I are three, so it's all good."
"But I want you, just you, on my mind this weekend."
"Well, you're nice and hard. Would you be ready to be inside me? I'm ready, if you need to know that."
"I'm ready, bro." Sam opened the drawer to see if it had lube. It did. "Should I use one of the condoms?"
"You've had only David and Aaron?"
"Yeah. I know they're safe. I'm not lying about being with anyone else. The guy ..."
"I trust you, bro. That's part of love. If you lie, you only hurt me,or your bros."
"I don't lie, and I won't. I do know the consequences. Someone wise taught me not to say anything I did not mean, and to not lie."
"I know, and I'm there with you, love. You were concerned that Aaron had AIDS, until you knew about his cancer. It's wise to keep that in mind, no matter whom you're with. You know I've only been with Skip, Aaron, and David. And now it's your turn to add to our connection. Come on, love, slide inside me."
Sam got on his knees and entered Billy in one long slide. Billy opened up to accept Sam's cock. He looked at Sam, almost as if seeing him for the first time. Sam has deep blue eyes. He found himself getting lost in those beautiful eyes. He smiled.
"Your eyes. They are so beautiful. I noticed them that night ... but I was afraid of you. Now I don't have to be afraid any more. It's not just your eyes. It's you."
Sam smiled and then kissed Billy. He had established his smooth rhythm. He had jacked off this morning so that he would not come too fast tonight. He ate his load, thinking about how Billy would taste.
His hair is dirty blond and his nose just a bit small, and very cute. He features are not model perfect, like David and Henry, but he is very much like the sweet boy next door than guys fantasize about.
His body is smooth as silk. He's lean, like a swimmer, and he's a pleasing 5'11" boy. Skip is 5'9", Aaron is 5'11", and David is a tall 6'2". We were all handsome, even me (I look like my pop), yet uniquely our own. Sam had been right that I should be his size. We were 105 pounds and 175 pounds. Sam felt taller because he also had hair, unlike me, their cancer-stricken buddy.
"What?" Billy said again.
There was a tear running down Sam's cheek.
"I just need to tell a buddy that I love him. And I love you, too, bro. I never guessed that I'd be making love to you, not after ..."
"Sshhhh, that's in the past, bro. We don't live in the past. You love me in the present, and you are a gift."
"Nice play on words, bro. Mmmm, I gotta stop for a bit."
He slid his cock all the way inside of Billy, and lay on top of him. They kissed for a while. Sam moved his cock only enough to stay hard. He did not compare how I felt to how David felt to how Billy felt. We are unique and special, though we did love Sam very much. He was a saved soul, which makes him a cut above most anyone else. The Sam's of the world were the goal. We had one, which was 100% victory. Any loss would really crush us.
For now, Billy had Sam, and Sam had Billy. Sam picked up his rhythm again, sliding in and out of Billy, just about ready to come. This first time, Billy would want Sam's cum inside of him, to seal their love. In the future, Billy would take Sam's load in his mouth. Billy planned `in the future' to mean tomorrow morning.
"Showing me the love, my brother. This feels so good. I love your hot cock inside me."
"I love being inside you. Aaron was my first, and this still feels like the first time. Does that ever go away?"
"Not by how my bros love me. It's always like the first time."
"I'm close, Billy. I wish it didn't have to end yet, but there ... unhhhh, unhhhh, ohhhhhhhhhhh."
Billy held Sam tightly and looked into his eyes. Sam locked into Billy's eyes and he kept pumping his cum into Billy's tight ass.
Sam's eyes overflowed. Billy kissed every tear away, but he could not do much about his own. Sam returned the favor, and kissed Billy's tears away lovingly. The boys were thrilled to be a permanent part of each other now.
"Do you want me now, or ..."
"Yeah, I want you now, Billy. You'll be better than me, but you know I love you."
"I'll be as good to you as you just were to me. That's a promise I can live up to. You are a wonderful lover."
Sam kissed Billy, well pleased. Billy lubed up his cock, then teased Sam's hole with one finger, then two. He hit Sam's joy buzzer.
"Wow, bro. Do that again."
Billy did it again.
"Hooooooo, sweet. What is that?"
"Your prostate. Aaron calls it a joy buzzer."
"Rightly so. You buzzed my joy. Did my cock hit yours, like your fingers on mine?"
"Yeah. Why do you think I cried? It was a perfect fuck. You can forget about being a bad lover. You're a wonderful, beautiful boy."
"Be that for me. Pretty please?"
Billy got up on his knees and slid inside of Sam in his classic one-thrust push.
"I love that. Aaron did that to me. David did not, for obvious reasons. David said that he could only do a long slow journey. I told him I would never complain about long and slow."
"Long and slow is the best, because it's not just a fuck. It's not about getting off, right?"
"Right. It's about making sweet love. I know you can, too. Yours is only the third cock inside me. Skip will be the fourth, if he'll have me, and then I'll really be complete. Crud, that didn't come out right."
"Sure it did. Skip completes me, too, every time."
"Thanks for not making me feel stupid."
"Love, you are not stupid. You have three men to love you, for as long as you want us to. Beyond that, you have David for life. You are two, and we are two, but only for tonight. Will you come home with me when I go again?"
All the while they were talking, Billy was sliding smoothly in and out of Sam. Sam opened and clenched in an absolutely perfect rhythm. He could easily drain Billy's balls, so Billy pushed all the way in and left his cock there for a few minutes.
"Yeah. I want Skip for an evening. And then I want to do this with you all. Has anyone else said that about me?"
"Yes. We all have. While we're at school, you can have me when you want to. We should do a threesome with David, too, of course."
"I can have you, without David?"
"If you want to. David is okay with however you want to love us, one on one or together. So am I."
"It feels ... different, I guess, to have love from more than one. I know it's equal, so I guess that's why it works. What was your first time with Skip like?"
"It was totally out of fear. I was terrified Skip would die and leave me alone. I wanted him to have me forever, even beyond here. We did very little for three days but keep our cocks inside each other. But he wouldn't let me cry. He said he would live, one way or another. Even then, it would have killed me to lose him."
"He's that special?"
"Oh yeah. And Aaron, and David, and, beautifully special, you."
"Aww Billy, I'm not up there with them yet. Maybe someday."
"Nope. This very moment. I cried earlier because of you. That's love, bro, real love."
Sam nodded. He kept making love to Billy's cock. Billy finally knew that he had to come, to give his seed to Sam.
Love grew from that seed, as it had three times already. Sam was more special because he was thrown away. But Billy never voiced that. His heart had been full when he had found Sam under a pile of boxes, after Sam had been driven by panic. Now he was driven only by love and caring. Sam needed to be loved. Sam wanted to be loved. And so he would be, forever.
In the morning, Billy woke up slowly. When Sam knew that Billy was more awake than asleep, he slid under the covers. Billy was hard, of course, so Sam decided to take care of that. Billy lay quietly, letting Sam enjoy himself. There were times when all the guys thought that just sex was fine, because of the animal side of them. Those times were rare, but still nice. After a while, Billy pushed the covers down.
"Good morning, love. I hope you're enjoying that as much as I am," Billy said.
"Yum!" said Sam. He sucked and stroked Billy's cock.
"Mmmm, that's really nice. My little expert."
"Not really," said Sam. "The first time I gave a guy a blowjob, I got caught".
"Awww, sorry that happened love."
"I'm not. It brought me to this very moment. And it brought me four boys to love me."
"We do, too. You don't have to keep that up if you don't want to."
"I want to. I want your load in my mouth, so I can taste you. Is that okay?"
"Perfectly okay. If your mouth gets tired, you can diddle my joy buzzer."
Billy relaxed and Sam got back into enjoying Billy's cock. It went on for a while, but Sam's mouth had finally had enough, and he got a bit impatient for more than just pre-cum. He slid his index finger inside Billy's hole. He let Billy have it. Then Billy let Sam have it. Sam swallowed it all, and then cleaned up Billy's cock.
"I repeat, yum!"
"Wow, nice diddle, bro."
"I thought you'd like that. It's like the instant come button."
"Later, bro. Your cum made me realize I'm hungry for real. Let's shower and join the guys for breakfast. But, uh, what are they going to think of us. They knew what last night was about."
"They'll be happy that you are being loved. And maybe a little jealous, but that'll pass."
Sam received an email from his sister's account, but from his middle brother. His brother said that he had hacked into their sister's email account. He wanted Sam to come home. They would work thinks out, somehow. Sam said he now belonged to another family. He would not come home. It was not home, and he had been thrown away.
He asked if the boys would set up an email account for them both, so he could talk to them. They could use the school or public library to get to their email, so their father would not know. He reminded them to delete the sent message from his sister's email account.
In another day, they sent another email to Sam, from their joint email account. They asked only one thing—that Sam not hate them. They said that they did not believe their father's spiel. Sam was their brother after all. They both told him that they love him a lot. They would arrange to meet up with him in Boston some weekend.
Sam was happier than he had been all day. He shared the email with the guys. They were thrilled with how his brothers thought about Sam. They also figured that sister would come around one day, seeing that the boys accepted Sam. They would just need to figure out what to tell their father before coming into Boston on Amtrak. Sam told them that what their father did not know would not hurt them.
By mid October, Billy said he wanted a weekend at home to see his family and me. He and Sam packed a duffle for the weekend. They arrived on Friday at 4:00, at Billy's place. Skip and I were making Saturday's dinner, my signature lasagna. The sauce is an 8-hour process, and is the only culinary venture that I am serious about. I was layering it together when Billy, David, and Sam arrived in Billy's kitchen. It would sit overnight in the fridge to `cure' and then I will bake it for tomorrow's dinner. For tonight's dinner, we are going to go out for Chinese, Sam's favorite food.
After dinner, we sat out in Skip's backyard, which adjoined Billy's, without a fence in between. We sat together, though not in the usual pairs because we were five this weekend.
"What's your fortune, Sam," I asked.
"He who laughs at himself never runs out of things to laugh at."
"And ..." Billy prompted.
"In bed," said Sam, laughing hard. "I guess lightening up turned out to be a good thing, guys."
"Yours Aaron?" asked Skip.
"Oooh baby. Today is a lucky day for those who remain cheerful and optimistic, in bed."
"Sounds like it's gonna be a good night for David, Aaron and me. Cheerfully optimistic in bed. Rah!" said Billy. "What's yours David?"
"Sweet! A secret admirer will soon send you a sign of [his] affection, in bed. Hmmm, I wonder who he is. Can't be you guys; ain't no secrets here. Maybe I should go stand on the corner and see who shows up."
"Keep that up and you'll be standing in a corner, in the living room. Bad boy!" said Billy. "What's yours say, bro," he asked Skip.
"Whoo hoo! The one you love is closer than you think, in bed!"
He leaned in and kissed Sam, sitting next to him, and then me, David, and finally Billy. "Best til last, bro," he whispered to Billy, who kissed him again.
"And Billy, how about yours."
"Mine's hard," he said, straight faced.
"No no, your fortune," said David, laughing.
"Ohhh, my fortune. We cannot do great things; only small things with great love, in bed, and otherwise."
We laughed and enjoyed each other's company throughout the evening. When we got chilly, we went inside to hold on to each other. We sat on the floor.
"I feel greedy," said Sam. "I want to hold two of my brothers."
He pulled Billy and David to him, putting one arm around both of their stomachs from behind. He kissed each boy on his neck, and signed contently. Yanni was on the CD player.
"Wow, is that music made for romance or what," said Sam.
He held his boys closer. They each held his arms, and then turned on their sides to face him. Each kissed Sam for a few moments in turn, and then for a couple minutes each. Sam and his brothers did make for an awesome romantic scene.
I held Skip from behind, wrapping both arms around him and kissing him as he turned his head to me. We did not really make plans for the weekend because we were not really planners. Spontaneous was good. Romance ruled the evening, as we held on to each other, talking, kissing, and listening to music. There was nothing in the world we would rather be doing than welcoming our newest brother into our circle.
David felt a tear on his neck. He turned to look at Sam.
"You okay, bro?"
Sam only nodded. He held David with both arms for a few minutes.
"I love you, very much," he told David. "I never thought my life would be this good."
"You create your own life, love. Everything you did in your past led you to this moment. Everything you do in the future leads you to other moments. Those are what you live."
"The future isn't where my life is; it's in the moments I'm in."
"Who taught you that," I asked.
"You, eventually. You all, and our buds at school, improved my life a thousand percent. I won't take credit for this, not by myself."
"You were the one who had to accept this, or not. You make awesome choices," David said, blushing.
"Billy made me accept you. What choice did I have, but unhappiness?"
"A choice to live."
"It was a hard choice, bro. Look where you found me, hiding in a basement and ready to run away for good."
"Fear won out for awhile. And ..."
"And you took the fear away, Billy. You loved me to life. I know you helped, Aaron, because I know that getting me straight, uh, so to speak, wasn't easy."
"And you are our reward, bro, in spades," said Billy.
He hugged Sam close to him. He kissed him, which always made words more than just words. It was obvious that Billy loved Sam only second to David. It took nothing away from the rest of us. It never will.
It was past 2:00 a.m. by the time we parted. Billy, David, and Sam will be together tonight, so they could continue where they left off earlier in the week. Mostly they would sleep, but there was time enough for romance, or a little sex.
Skip and I made our own romantic sex. He entered me as soon as we got into bed, and loved me for loving our boys, for helping to rescue Sam, and for loving him sincerely. Later, when he came inside of me, he and I contentedly went to sleep.
We slept until 9:00, wanting to surprise the three lovers with breakfast in bed. The boys were awake at 9:30. We brought three trays of eggs, bacon, toast, juice, and fresh berries to them.
"Wow, don't let me get used to this, boys," said Sam, in awe.
"You should get used to love, my young man," I said, kissing him first.
Skip and I went away, leaving them alone. He and I ate in his kitchen, and then he and I went back to bed because he wanted me inside of him for a while. I came hard inside of him twenty or so minutes after entering him. He was the only boy in my thoughts.
However, it was Sam's weekend. We headed north to the lake for an overnight. It was cold, so we dressed warmly and brought sleeping bags. Later, a nice hot lasagna dinner would warm us up, but first we biked and hiked through the trails. It was a must to watch the sunset together from a high rocky outcropping.
"I never did this before, Skip. You know, just sat down to watch the sun set. I look at them, but I don't really see them."
"Look around, love. What else do you see?" Skip asked.
"Pinks in the clouds. Ripples in the lake."
"Is that it?"
"Yeah, pretty good by my standards."
"How about the hawk that just took off from that high tree?" I asked.
I pointed over his shoulder, tracking the hawk with my finger so he could see it. It flew for a few minutes and landed in another high tree.
"The cloud that looks like a dog's head," said Billy. "The way the clouds change shape every few minutes."
"How the air smells in October, crisp and clean during the day and like smoke tonight. Someone lit a fire," I said.
"The chill in the breeze, love," said David. "It makes people do this," he said, hugging Sam from behind tightly and then kissing him.
"The taste of the moisture. Rain is coming," said Skip. "The sun's color and shape as it sets. The sound of the crickets. The bull frogs will join then in an evening symphony in a while."
"The feel of day light, dusk, and then evening," I added. "I'm a creature of the night, though dusk runs a close second in how it feels; soft and calm.
"Wow. My standards are too low. I hear the breeze in the trees, too. I see what you want me to, and smell, too. I do feel it all as well. I feel like I've been blind and deaf, and you just restored me. Existing sucks. Why can't we just live? I know not everyone sees what you all do. It's crazy not to."
"And don't forget the feel of my arms around you, or me inside of you, and you inside of me, how you love me. The taste of my lips, my touch on your skin." said David.
"And the sound of `I love you'," finished Sam.
He had not thought about it for an instant. His words flowed smoothly from David's words into his own.
"Awww, Sam, excellent! Boys?" said David.
"I love you, Sam, with all my heart," said Billy. He gave him a long sweet hug.
"I love you, Sam, because you need and want love, and you've returned it to me," I said. He came to me and hugged me the way I like it best.
"I love you, Sam, because you are a beautiful and kind soul," Skip said. He kissed Sam on his forehead and hugged him. They looked into each other's eyes, and maybe into each other's souls. Skip knew how, and he could teach Sam.
"I love you, Sam, because you are my brother, and my beating heart," said David. He put Sam's hand on top of his heart. "See?"
"I can't do that justice, to any of you, but I can do this," Sam said.
He leaned in hugged each one of us for a few moments each. He whispered something in each ear.
"I love you very much Aaron. I can feel again, like I'm supposed to."
He looked into my eyes as he said it, softly, for me only. He put his hand on my cheek and kissed me again, just right. We looked into my eyes. "You're amazing."
When he kissed David, last and best, David stood Sam up. He hugged him and kissed him, more than just right.
"Ready to go home, bro?" he asked.
"Yeah. I'm hungry."
It took 45 minutes to bake the lasagna. We had salad and bread while we waited. Billy had bought cannolis for dessert, but also surprised us with an Italian pastry assortment. He ate very little dessert, but he knew what we all liked. I think he also sneaked downstairs for a midnight snack on occasion.
He and Skip had continued to run when they could, something I no longer needed to do. I did miss it though. I tried only once since my surgery and recovery, but I got a stitch in my side that was hard to fight against. Skip ran less because of his lung, but ran anyway. They are fit, slim, beautifully built. I, however, am a scrawny-assed young man, too thin, bald, and vastly unappealing to anyone. The Circle never made me feel that way, but they knew my heart, not just my physical being.
I sat and stared at Skip, not realizing I was doing it. He winked at me. Of course, he could read me. He nodded to me and gave me beautiful eyes. Skip was at the center of The Circle, but probably did not feel that way. We had come a long way in almost three years of friendship. He truly was the boy who rocked my heart.
"Monday night," he said, not very loud. I got it.
"Nothing, Billy. Thinking out loud."
I nodded so that he knew I understood him. He smiled a sly smile. I felt my dick tingle. I loved that feeling, because it also meant that I was going to have a loving body to hold all night. Where the dick ended up did not matter. It could spend three minutes in his mouth and I'd be happy enough. I loved his arms and his lips. Actually, I love the complete package, the man.
We went to bed earlier tonight, around 11:30, since the outdoor fun had made us content and tired. I held on to Skip, who held on to me. The other three boys were on their own, though we would be there for them anytime. The only thing I knew for sure is that one of the boys asked for David to be inside of his butt, and that David had entered him happily.
Skip and I smiled at each other. He tucked into my neck and I held him close. I wanted Skip to come back to me, selfishly, where we started. The `school boys' had each other, though they would not lose much from us.
Skip and I woke up at the same time. It was another reason to love him. We went to sleep together and woke up together. He knows when I was thinking about him during the day. Well, that was easy enough, because I thought about him very often. He knows that I love him first and best, but he loves to hear the words, to get the hug and to return it, and to be blessed with the kiss. We did not say anything at all. We watched each other's eyes. He took my hands and kissed my palms. I did not do anything to compete with his attention. Romance was two ways, but sometimes it was all about giving to your mate, so I received quite happily.
My mind wandered back to how we met, how so kind he was to me then. His support of me, and my struggles, was so heartfelt. And then he had had his own bad time, and I never gave up on knowing he would be his family's son and brother, and mine again. He loved me while I cared for Billy. It's easy to see that we did not live boring lives. We hurt profoundly when we hurt, and we loved as profoundly. I am not one to do things half way. To struggle was one thing. To struggle and survive was quite another.
"Nice thought, bro," he whispered. "You are the only one to still struggle. I wish you were well."
"I'm well enough, love. You know that."
"You suffer in quiet, but you still suffer. The cancer is painful. I know that, as well as you do."
"It's not right to show it, not to ..." I said, motioning my head.
"They're tough. They can handle it," he reminded me.
"I know, but I can't. They've been through enough."
"And you haven't?"
"There are four men in this room who love me brilliantly. There are thirteen more at school, plus Patrick. Marissa and Jimmy, Nate and Bryan, Edward and Kathryn, Jillian, Alex, Kirk, Andrew and Claire. Who have I left out?"
"Just one. Think for a moment."
"Michael. God love Michael, our warrior and friend."
"He has suffered too. Poor dude had to lose his testicle. That's hard for a young man, when he's just beginning to be in love."
"No one knows better than you. But you had to love differently, so afraid. You accepted his love just as urgently."
"And I still love him deeply. Nate and Edward suffered seeing Billy almost killed. Jimmy got Billy's blood on his hands and clothing. You probably don't know, but he did not clean up his ski jacket. It's a reminder of how bad hate can be. That was awful for all of them. Plus Jimmy has Hodgkin's disease."
"Michael is nearly healed," Skip reminded me. "He calls me to tell me how he is. Nate and Edward have closure because they sent a man to prison for eight years. Jimmy is near the end of his treatments. Billy has us to love, and I didn't die. I'm better than ever. That still leaves you, alone."
"I'm not alone, love. I have you. Love me like Billy loved you when you were sick."
"It was intense, fearful."
"I won't take fearful, but I'll take intense."
"But it is fearful, love."
"You have so many to love you, if I die."
"They're not you."
"They're way better than me."
"No. They are not."
"Yes, by a long shot."
"You know something that I don't. That's why you're saying all of this, even when you know it's not even close to being true."
I said nothing. He did not push me to tell him, because he respected me, and my ways. We would talk about it, but not now. I wanted to hold him, as if my life depended on it. Truly ,it does. We were close to bringing Sam into us. Sam will want Skip today, and Skip had every desire to make love to Sam. At this moment, however, Skip wanted only me. We kissed each other but it was different, because he knew I was withholding information. He could not read me in that manner.
"What can I do for you?"
"Keep my in here," I said, touching his heart. "Keep hopeful."
"I can do both. What else?"
"Love Sam. Make him complete."
He looked over at Sam, who is still sleeping.
"He looks like an angel. I'd guess that David is inside him. He's pretty happy."
"He'll be happier when he makes love to you, and you to him. He deserves you, and he's earned it."
"No argument there, love. It's what's made us all so special to each other. As loving as he has been, it's not complete, as you say. I do want him."
"I'm glad, love. He needs us, everything about us."
"Will he like my cock?"
I laughed softly. "Even better, he'll love your testicle, too. He already told Billy how he's going to treat it."
"Love him sincerely, Skip. That all he'll ever ask you for."
"I'll love him the way I love you."
"Lucky boy. And lucky me."
Skip got out of our sleeping bag. He went over to the three sleeping beauties and kissed each one awake. He lay in front of Sam and hugged him very warmly.
"Good morning my love. Did you sleep well?"
"I did. David helped, as you can see. Are we, uh ... later?"
Skip kissed Sam in answer. Sam smiled brightly. He reached down to touch Skip's testicle, to show him that he was not afraid of it.
We got up and dressed, hungry of course. We picked up our stuff, filled the trucks, locked up, and headed out to our favorite local diner.
Once we got home, Skip hugged Sam to him and took him to his townhouse. It was going to be as loving as it was hot. I even envied Sam, but just a little. The boys had all night. Skip would later tell me that Sam was so loving and so gentle, that Skip was surprised he'd not embraced Sam's love sooner. It was more than Skip expected from a young man with little experience. He thanked Billy and David, and me, for showing Sam real love and genuine affection. David said that whomever Sam chose for his life mate would be truly blessed. I guessed, confidently, that David would be Sam's life mate. Billy was their solid third mate, as he was ours. Billy loved being the `bridge' between us couples.
After that weekend, Skip and I went back to being a true couple.
Billy has us any time he wants, and his schoolmates as well. He had the best of both, really, but also deserved it. A brutal physical attack gave him the right to an honorable life, having anything he wanted.
Sam having a real family was his own reward. He also has two brothers who will be there for him. Sam talked to Kate and Aaron, after telling his brothers he had a special request. The brothers thought Sam deserved no less. Sam wanted to change his last name to David's, and his parents. They were pleased and honored, and even Aaron not Langille cried a little. Kate and Aaron did what was necessary to make it happen.
David had what he wanted—a brother. Beyond that, his needs were zero and his wants were few.
The boys, including all the mates at school, would not lose much from Skip and me. However, they all also sensed, and eventually knew, that there was a need for Skip and me to be alone together for a while. We will visit the boys at school a couple weekends each month, for a Saturday overnight. The Circle was large and strong, as it should stay. The loss of even one would be hard, so we will work very hard to avoid any loss.
Holiday plans for Connecticut changed. We boys would not go to Connecticut for Christmas. We would rather the boys enjoy their first Christmas together, alone.
Instead, the whole family—Betsy and JD, Skip, Billy, and I joined David and Sam at Kate and Aaron's home for Thanksgiving. Betsy and JD got the guest room. The rest of us spent more quality time in our beloved sleeping bags. The folks provided us with air mattresses to make us more comfortable. Nice touch.
"Uh, bro, you told me there was no guest room in the house, when I was here this summer," I said.
"There wasn't. But after we made Dad a new garage, he took it a step further and added living space above it. Let me show you."
We walked into a room that was stylish and warm. There is a fireplace on the back wall, in the contemporary style I loved, with two chairs in front. There is no bed, so I guessed that the sofa pulled out. Wait there is a cabinet. Ah ha, a Murphy bed. Brilliant. Who woulda thunk? A sitting area with two more chairs sat in front of a large sunny window. A large closet had been made into an attractive en-suite.
"I guess we were inspiring, love," I said to David.
"You were and are," said Aaron from behind us. "David told us about your Murphy bed in the studio apartment. The mattress in this is far better than in a sofa bed. It cost more, but our company loves us for it. Come on boys, dinner is ready."
"Wow, we get meals too? This is a first class motel, no?"
Dad and son laughed. "First class. Like you, Aaron."
"Nah nah, don't put me anywhere but grounded. I'm only a simple man, and always will be."
"Okay, but you're special, and I love you for everything you are ... and everything you're not," said David.
We arrived in the kitchen. Everyone had heard what David said, and everyone agreed. They raised glasses of wine.
"To everything you are, Aaron Langille ... and to everything you are not," said Sam. "I, too, love you for both."
"And, to us," said Betsy, "for all the love we have. No one is richer than we are."
"Cheers to us all," said JD, sincerely. We all raised our glasses, to us.
Thanksgiving dinner truly was a feast. We had great food, companionship of all kinds, and, as Betsy said, no one was richer than we are. We loved passionately, and lived passionately as well.
Skip and I enjoyed each other, by ourselves, for the first time in months. We were between Thanksgiving and Christmas, and home alone. We started with a hot bath, just holding and kissing wonderfully. I did play with his cock, and he played with mine, but it was minor, for now. We liked each other hard.
We enjoyed the warm candlelit glow of my bathroom, and fresh flowers that Betsy had brought for us. One vase sat on my dining room table. She put two white roses on my fireplace mantle in the living room and two more on the bedroom fireplace.
She too sensed that I was in trouble, and that Skip was putting all his energy back into me. My color was pale and I was weak. She also knew we would not sacrifice any need anyone else had. In a way, we made love to almost everyone we met. The ultimate orgasm was saving a boy like Sam, from hate and from himself.
Tonight we wanted the other kind of orgasm, so we toweled each other off, and held each other through a couple more nice kisses. He picked me up and carried me to my bed. He stoked the fireplace a bit and then lay down beside me.
"I love you," he said simply.
"I love you almost as much."
"You love me equally."
"Not possible. I try to match your love for me. I can't."
"How much do you fall short?" he said, smiling. He stroked my cheek.
"Then I'll slow my heart rate by one heartbeat."
"Please don't. I love how we are, even if I fall short. It makes you one heartbeat more special than me."
"You're a romantic. It's an endearing attribute. But I don't want to be better than you."
"Live with it."
"You won't ever leave me, will you?" His eyes were moist.
He lay behind me, so he turned me away from him gently. He raised my left leg and entered me with little effort.
"I won't let you go, ever. I'm a part of you, so where you go, I go."
"You'll have to let me go, some day. Not tonight. I'm well enough, but ..."
"Sshhhh. I'm part of you, and I won't let you go."
He held me tight. He would take me to a wonderful place, though, because he loved me. It was nice, what he did to me with his cock inside of me. Maybe I died, and did not know it, and this was Heaven after all.
"Nope," he said to me. "Just our little corner of the world."
He pulled out of my ass and laid me on my back. He put my legs on his shoulders, slid his cock into me slowly, and then leaned in to kiss me. My friend, my partner, my lover, my confidant, and my heart mate. This really isn't Heaven? Then I won't go anywhere, tonight or some day.
"We both will, love, but that's another topic for another day. Close down your mind and let me love you, okay?"
"Okay. You lead and I'll follow. Anywhere."
Christmas morning brought the best gift that Sam would possibly ever receive. He was now Sam Jared, David Jared's brother by name. Aaron and Kate had taken care of everything for Sam so that this would be no-stress, and a gift.
"Welcome home, my bro, and my love. How do you feel about this?"
Sam whispered in David's ear. The boys went upstairs without looking back.
"So, it's a new year, my love. You've been struggling, mostly in quiet. Andrew is spending a lot of time in his lab in DC."
"The meds we've been using for the past year have stopped working. Two of the tumors behind my remaining kidney aren't reacting any more. There is new growth, too."
"Can Andrew increase the dosages, or add another drug?"
"No to increase the dosage. It's toxic as it is. And not do adding another, not until he flushes the current meds out. The chemical interaction would be a deadly cocktail. The balance is finite, and we're reached it."
"Shit. You're barely strong enough to breathe, never mind hours of surgery."
"That's the problem. I'm between a rock and a hard place. All this will take time, and we don't have it.
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