and I returned to school that next Monday as if nothing
happened. Little bit and I saw a new Dwayne emerging who was
strong, purposeful and didn’t fear the future. Now that he was
out from under the Colonel, school wasn’t anything he couldn’t handle.
When things were starting to get to him, he remembered the love of his
handsome giant, his wonderful cowboy dad, his brother’s love, and the
love of a strong group of men in the community; men who were not
selfish in letting him know they cared about him and were standing
strongly behind him. Sheriff Leland Bard was especially good to
In a small town,
it’s almost impossible to keep anything secret. People gossip and
there’s nothing you can do about it. Dwayne knew that, but he wasn’t
going to let it get to him. He had me and little bit to keep his
spirits up and we were like two guard dogs. We figured nothing got out
through the men who were there that night, but most of it probably got
started through the paramedics and hospital staff. Almost all the
kids who were part of the ‘in group’ in school heard something about it
even if all the facts weren’t right.
It was common
knowledge the Colonel was in jail on child molestation charges,
attempted murder, and conspiracy to commit murder, and several other
charges, but they only were concerned with the molestation part. To
them, that was the juicy part. Since Dwayne was an only child it
didn’t take a rocket scientist to figure out who was involved. It
was a little more sketchy for them what the giant, black man’s part in
all of it was, but they weren’t about to ask. They knew he wasn’t
charged with anything and was rumored to have saved Dwayne’s
asked if he could sit with us at lunch. We knew he’d heard. He simply
stuck out his hand to Dwayne to shake his hand, told how much he
admired him, and he would be proud to think on him as his brother. It
brought tears to Dwayne’s eyes, but he didn’t break down. Dwayne
thanked him graciously, and pulled Gary to him and gave him a hug. He
told him he would be honored for Gary to think of him as his brother,
and he was pleased to think on Gary as his brother as well. Nothing
more was said, but Gary Peacock became one of Dwayne’s greatest
defenders. If he heard anyone gossiping about Dwayne he’d embarrass the
shit out of them. That stopped it pretty damn quick.
For the fourteen
days Lamar was in the hospital the three of us would walk over to the
hospital from school and visit for a while. We would have an hour or so
until my dad came to pick Dwayne and I up, and Mr. Wiggins came for
Sidney. Lamar seemed so happy to see us and always had something funny
to tell us about his day. He’d have us laughing with him.
Little bit and I would leave him alone with Dwayne for a while and wait
out in the lobby for our rides.
“Did you obey
your Captain, boy?” Lamar asked Dwayne gently.
“Yes, Sir, and
thank you, Sir. It was wonderful. My dad really is what I needed right
now. I’m so happy he’s here with me. He’ll be here all week. He was
more than I expected, Sir. I love him, but he’s my dad, and I love you.”
“I’m glad for
that report, boy. I know’s you love me. That’s why I can
tell you to give yourself to your old man and let him heal you,
Son. I knew the minute I met him he was a good man. I have
a feeling he’s gonna’ be in both our lives for a long time to come.”
“I hope so,
Lamar. I think he will, too. I love him a lot but not in
the same way I love you.”
“You don’t have
to explain to me, baby boy. I know how much you loves me and it’s
separate from your love for your old man. That’s as it should be. You
should love and honor your dad. Let both loves grow inside you,
there’s room for both. You got a big heart, Dwayne. I saw what your
spirit was made of in that damn bathroom that night, Son. You be a lot
stronger than you think you are. I love you, too, baby boy.”
Dwayne stole a
quick kiss, and said his goodbyes when I hollered at him. After
fourteen days we drove Lamar back to Pendleton. Sticker volunteered to
drive us in his new Humvee. There was room for dad, Dwayne, Logan, big
Sidney, Lamar and me. We thought he might have some trepidation about
going back, but he didn’t. He was looking forward to getting on with
his life. He had new friends and new goals for himself. He was
happy, and he seemed content and confident. Sicker’s shiny black Humvee
turned a lot of heads and all looked to see a huge black man being
accompanied by six cowboys. We took him to the admin building, and they
directed him to the infirmary. We said our goodbyes and made a big
to-do about shaking hands.
Dwayne was a
little down, but we kept reminding him he’d see him in a couple of week
for graduation. His dad had to leave after spending a wonderful week
with him. Sticker drove him back to the stock company. Dad and I
laughed at them. They weren’t too silent in their love making and we
could hear Dwayne telling his dad, “Fuck me, cowboy! Ride that damn
thing!” Dad and I would hold each other laughing. We were happy for
them, it’s exactly what both of them needed and they were making up for
lost time. It was exactly what Dwayne needed, and my dad told me Rance
confided in him it was just what he needed, too. Dwayne gained a great
deal of courage and love from his dad that made him stronger than he
had ever been. I was proud of my brother.
me, the same night Rance told Dwayne about us being cousins, and
at first I couldn’t believe it; but then, when I thought about Rance’s
eyes being like mine, I had to believe my dad. I know he wouldn’t
lie to me, but it was just so hard to believe. It was wonderful news.
It explained a lot of things about Dwayne and I we always took for
granted being close friends. To find out we were related shed new light
on our relationship. Dad was right to tell us about being cousins. It
only made things better, and Dwayne was right, little bit had a fit. He
knew for sure we were making the story up and blowing smoke up his ass.
He came over that day just to hear it from the two horse’s mouths, my
dad and Dwayne’s dad. He was flabbergasted. Dwayne and I had to
administer much mouth-to-mouth resuscitation along with an ample dose
of hide the little green snake.
through the last three weeks of school and we were out for summer
vacation. Dwayne, Sidney and I spent a great deal of time together, and
we watched our big brother grow into a man that summer. I think the
experience matured the three of us. Mr. Wainright and Sticker told our
dads they never saw such a dramatic change in Logan as there was since
he bonded with us. They were both more than a little pleased and proud
of their boy and us. They bonded in friendship stronger than ever with
the other men of the community. They all came to love and respect
Sheriff Leland Bard as a man who brought strength of convictions and
humanity to his job.
Dad gave the
papers Sadie left him to Rance and Dwayne the same evening she brought
them by. Rance had a rodeo in a small town about thirty miles south and
drove to our place every night he was there. We were having Rance,
Dwayne and the Winchesters over for dinner. When dad told them what
Sadie did, there was a great silence around the table. Rance was
stunned, but after a while, when everything calmed down, it began to
sink in, the ranch really belonged to them now. It took them a while to
realize they had to make a decision what were they going to do with it?
Dwayne knew his
daddy loved his job, and he wouldn’t quit it for the world. Dwayne
didn’t want him to. He saw how much his dad loved his job. He not
only loved the job, it was important to him for his own self-esteem and
self-worth, and for the first time in many years Rance Harding was
proud of himself and who he was. He could walk tall. Dwayne was proud
of his dad. The way Rance came to his boy’s side when Dwayne needed him
gained him a great deal of love and respect from the community.
Dwayne talked it
over with me and Sidney and we suggested they hold on to the ranch as a
backstop or fall back thing for their lives. We reminded him one day
his daddy was going to get too old to do that job. Sidney pointed
out traveling and being on the road as much as he was, begins to get
very old and tiring after a while no matter how much you love it or how
much it pays. You just get sick of living out of a suitcase.
Dad urged Rance
to hold on to the ranch for much the same reasons. Rance thought it
might be too much for the boy to live there again because of the bad
memories, but Dwayne assured Rance only six months of his life was
taken away by the Colonel, and he wouldn’t have any problem living
there again. He was firm and honest with his dad when he told him it
would be a different story if they hadn’t brought Dunbar to
justice. If the Colonel got away with it to do the same to
others, then no, he didn’t think he could go back there ever again;
however, that wasn’t the case, and he saw no problems with it
Sidney’s dad what he thought they should do. Rance wanted to change the
title to joint tenancy, but Sidney advise them not to. If they put it
in joint tenancy, if anything happened to Rance or Dwayne the survivor
would have to pay a lot of fees and taxes. Sidney suggested they keep
it in Rance’s name and Rance would make out a living will, in the event
of his death, it would automatically become his heir’s property with
only minor fees for title change and no taxes.
They decided to
keep the ranch and Dwayne would run it part time with help from others
until he could finished high school. He still wanted to live with
the Winchesters until he graduated and then make a decision whether he
wanted to move on his own or not. Then, too, they had Frank and Curley
who were a fount of knowledge on how to run a ranch. They were
eager to see the ranch survive under Rance and Dwayne. Dwayne himself
grew up on the ranch. He was no novice to ranch life, and the amount of
work it required. Rance agreed he’d try to make it home as much as he
could to help make the ranch a success. Dwayne would work on it on
weekends and everyone helped him at one time or another. Hell,
they even got Gary Peacock on a pony several weekends.
The first week
in June was my seventeenth birthday. Dwayne’s was about six weeks later
in July, but we decided to celebrate both on my birthday. Dwayne
told his dad he didn’t want anything for his birthday, just him. That
was enough for Dwayne, and he truly meant it. We both wanted the folks
whom we loved to spend the day with us in celebration of not only our
birthdays, but as a thanksgiving of successfully coming out of a
terrible couple of weeks.
having to get rides with us and the Winchesters out to the ranch to get
anything done. He was still trying to do his chores to help Frank and
Curley out. Dad started loaning Dwayne his truck, and it really
helped out. Dwayne would pick me up every morning, and we’d drive to
school then out to the ranch to do the chores. Dad phoned Sticker and
told him what was going on. He thought Dwayne needed some
transportation of his own. He felt Dwayne was mature enough to be
responsible and certainly could use his own truck as a much needed tool
for the ranch. Sticker got in touch with Rance and told him what Vince
said. He told Rance he and big Sidney talked it over and agreed
Wiggins, what can I do for you, Sir?”
called me today and told me Dwayne’s having problems with
transportation to and from the ranch to the Winchester’s or the
Longhorns’s place. He suggested you get Dwayne a set of wheels for his
and Casey’s birthday party next week. Sidney and I agree with Vince, we
think Dwayne is mature enough to have his own truck. It would relieve a
lot of tension for Dwayne and help several people.”
Wiggins, I ain’t got time to go truck shopping for my boy before his
birthday. Hell, ‘at’s next week and you gimme’ that week off to
be with him. I was leaving Tucson on Friday night to get there for
Casey and his birthday celebration on Sunday. I don’t see how I
can. Maybe I can buy him one the week I’m there.”
crew cab Ford 3/4 ton truck I was driving before I got the Humvee?”
“Yes, Sir, that
was a really nice truck. It had a lot of extras on it.”
“Yeah, well I
didn’t trade it in on the Humvee. The Humvee was a birthday gift from
my boss man. The Ford’s been parked in one of Sidney’s garages
for over six months now. It’s only two years old and in perfect
condition. Hell, it’s still under warranty. If you want it, it’s yours
“How much you
asking for it, Mr. Wiggins?”
“How ‘bout a
blow job, cowboy?” Sticker roared with laughter.
“Cheap at twice
the price, Sir!” shot back Rance. “Hell, I’d bend over and
whistle like a’ pig fer ya.’” Rance broke up laughing. That only
made Sticker laugh harder.
yours, if you want it for Dwayne. Just be damn sure, me’n Sidney get to
sign the birthday card to let him know it’s from all of us.”
“Can I give you
anything for it, Sir?”
“No, you’ve done
more’n enough to cover it, ramrod. As Vince would say, I
garan-damn-tee-ya’!” Sticker laughed again and got a laugh out of
Rance. “Tell ya’ what,— I’ll get it out tomorrow and take to a
shop I deal with. I’ll have ‘um detail it, wash and wax it. It’ll
look brand new when they git through with it. You git Vince to drive
you over here on his birthday, you drive it back and give him the
keys. We’ll follow you back over. We’re invited to the
Sir! How can I ever thank you?
“You all ready
have, pod’na,’ more’n you know.”
appreciate it, Sir, and I know Dwayne’s gonna’ be thrilled. Would you
do me a favor, Sir. Out of respect for Spencer Winchester would
ju’ mind calling him for me and ask his permission to git Dwayne some
transportation for his birthday. I’d really appreciate it, Sir. I
know Spence probably won’t have a problem with it, but I’d jes’ like to
show him that respect, Sir.”
“Damn good idea,
Rance! I hadn’t even thought about it. No problem! You got
it, cowboy. I’ll call him right away. See you Sunday. Have a safe
trip, ya’ hear?”
“Yes, Sir, and
thanks again, Sir.”
* * * * * * *
did appreciate Sticker calling at Rance’s request and he thought it was
a wonderful idea. He certainly agreed, he felt Dwayne was mature
enough to have his own transportation, and it would solve a lot of
problems getting him out to the ranch and back. Spencer was
really touched the men took him into consideration and asked his
The day of our
birthday party we were up early cooking breakfast for everyone.
Dwayne had another wonderful night with his dad and from the sounds
from their bedroom, it gave the term ‘rough riders’ new dimensions.
Lord a-mighty, them two weren’t real quite about their love making.
Dwayne had a silly-ass grin on his face all morning. He was
cutting up potatoes for cowboy fries. I was watching him out of
the corner of my eyes, and he would just grin to himself from time to
“That good, huh,
cowboy?” I asked quietly. He turned to look at me, grinned
real big and just shook his head.
brother! I can’t gainsay that. Of course I don’t think of what
dad and I do as passionate, romantic love. I look’s on it more
like it’s medicinal. He’s jes’ give’n me another injection of
cowboy love’n to get me over the Colonel.” Dwayne giggled like
“You are so full
of shit, brother,— you was over the Colonel the first night dad and I
heard you yell, ‘Yahoo, ride ‘em, cowboy! Spur ‘em hard in the
flank!’” I laughed at Dawyne.
that?” He laughed.
“Dad and I don’t
even bother to have sex anymore when your dad’s here. We love it.
All we gotta’ do in lay there, make a little love, and listen to you
two. Hell, we come ever’ damn time.” I was laughing my ass off at him.
“I don’t believe
you! I’m gonna’ ask yore’ daddy. He won’t lie to me.”
on! Knock yourself out, brother!” I laughed at him.
“Oh, God, Case,—
I can’t help it! He done figured out that first night we were
together what he needed to gimme’ to git me over the Colonel. You’re
right, brother, that old cowboy got me over the Colonel the first damn
night, but for God’s sake don’t tell him! I got him believe’n I need a
shit load more of them fine cowboy fucks.” Dwayne had me in stitches.
“After each one, I tell him I think I’m git’n jes’ a little bit better.
Who knows, it might be years before I fully recover.”
I couldn’t stand
anymore, I had to leave the room. Dad and Rance came down for
breakfast and wanted to know what the hell was going on. Dwayne and I
just shook our heads.
“Trust me! You
don’t wanna’ know!” I told them. Then Dwayne and I laughed harder.
It was a
wonderful day. Dad barbecued and everyone came. There must have been
fifty people there, so Dwayne and I didn’t miss Sticker and Rance when
they took off to go get his truck. Sidney all ready knew about it, but
he didn’t say a word at first until I pulled him aside. After a while,
Dwayne started looking for his dad and Mr. Winchester told him he
thought he and Sticker ran to the store for some more ice. About
that time we looked up and saw Sticker’s Humvee being followed by the
dark, navy-blue pickup we knew was his old vehicle. Rance was
driving it, but Dwayne had no idea. Little bit couldn’t keep the
secret from his big brother, so I knew what was up. I was really
happy for Dwayne. The truck was polished to a high sheen and
looked brand new. Rance walked over as everyone gathered around. He
handed Dwayne the keys.
dropped open. He couldn’t believe the truck was for him.
“It’s from me,
Mr. Wiggins, Mr. Wianright, and Sidney, Son.” Rance handed him the
card. Dwayne opened it and burst into tears he was so touched.
His dad took him in his arms and hugged him. He recovered quickly to
thank Mr. Wiggins, Mr. Wainright, and to hug and kiss his little
brother. Dwayne was thrilled. It was a really nice truck
with lots of extras.
Not to be
outdone dad handed me the keys to our old pickup and told me I could
start driving it. He all ready taught me to drive, and I got my
license right after I turned sixteen. He still didn’t let me
drive much, but with Dwayne having his own transportation, he thought I
probably should, too. I gave him a hug and a kiss. He gave
me another birthday gift though. He gave me a beautiful new pony.
It was a little male pinto colt. It was so pretty I was thrilled
with it. I sincerely thanked him. I loved it.
“Can’t afford a
new truck for you, Son,— wish’t I could. I ain’t giving it to
ya,’ ‘cause we need it around the ranch, but you can use it. Ever’ damn
thing I have is yores anyway.”
“The old truck
suits me jes’ fine, Dad. You know I’ve always loved that old
truck. It has character. Hell, it ain’t that old. We
got it jes’ before mom past away about four years ago. Besides, I
love my new pony you gimme.’ I’m gonna’ make him into a fine
roping pony if’n I can. He’s so pretty. Thank you, Dad.”
The highlight of
Dwayne’s day was Lamar called to wish him a happy birthday. Dwayne was
thrilled. The infirmary was going to release him at the end of the
following week, and he was returning to a regular company who were
going to graduate in one week. He gave Dwayne the dates. Dwayne told
Lamar about his new truck. Lamar was happy for him. He
couldn’t wait to see it when we pick him up after graduation. He
was going to stay with us one night and we would take him to the
airport the following day to fly home.
know how it happened, but he got a letter and some official documents
that claimed his conviction for being an accessory in a car theft had
been rescinded and expunged from his record. He no longer had any
arrest record nor any conviction on his record, and the judge who
sentenced him was reprimanded. He was very happy and told Dwayne
to be sure and thank the sheriff for him. He told Dwayne to tell
him he would come thank him personally when he visits us on leave.
“I jes’ realized
you be seventeen this birthday. Lord, Lord, baby boy, you’s
gonna’ be a man this time come next year. You’s all ready a man to me,
boy. I kept think’n we’s got two more years before you turns eighteen,
but it ain’t, it’s next year. I’m gonna’ schedule my leave for that two
weeks for sure. I have leave coming right around then. I loved being
with you before ya’ll brought me back to the base. I loved hold’n you
in my arms, baby boy. I can’t think of nothing else but you, Son.
I love you, Dwayne, and hope you have a great birthday today. I’m
looking forward to seeing you and your brothers weekend after next.”
there. We may bring another few good men with us. I love
you, Lamar. I know you probably get tired of a kid telling you he loves
you, but I do. I think of you all the time.”
“Ole Lamar don’t
never git tired of hearing his baby boy tell him he loves him.
Now, don’t go saying that no more. I’s jes’ worried I might scare you
off by tell’n you too many times.”
“You don’t have
to worry either, Sir. You told me never to doubt your love, and I ain’t
gonna’ start now.”
Now that’s listen’n to your ole Captain. Gotta’ run, boy. Say hello to
all the good folks; especially, Sheriff Bard. He’s a good man. Bye,
baby boy, I love you.”
“Bye, Sir, I
love you, too.”
Dwayne went out
and shook Sheriff Bard’s hand and thanked him for having Lamar’s
conviction rescinded and everything including the arrest expunged from
his record. Dwayne told him the judge who wrongly convicted Lamar
wonderful news, but I didn’t have anything to do with it. I knew about
it, I knew it was in the works, but I’m really glad to hear it got
done. I had little doubt it wouldn’t get done, considering— ”
“The staff of
attorneys Mr. Wainright has on permanent retainer.”
did this for us?” Dwayne asked. The sheriff smiled at Dwayne’s
use of the word, ‘us.’
“Yes, Son, it
was him. Remember me asking if anyone might know someone who
could help this man. Sidney called me the next day and asked
where his attorney could get the particulars on Lamar’s conviction for
auto theft. I told him who to get in touch with, and I guess he took
care of it. Congratulations, I’m happy for you, both, Son.”
sheriff,— well,— we owe you a great deal of thanks as well. You really
been good to us, Sir.”
“Jes’ do’n my
job, young man,— jes’ do’n my job.” He smiled. “Oh, and by the
way, happy birthday, Son. Only one more year to go before your grand
opening.” He smiled wickedly. Dwayne laughed.
opening’?” Dwayne fell out laughing at the sheriff, “I’m praying
that’s exactly what it will be, Sir. We’ll be sure to invite chu,’
it for the world, Son. Jes’ remember to be a good boy and say
them prayers ever’ damn night. ” Sheriff Bard winked at him,
laughed and hugged Dwayne.
Dwayne went to
Mr. Wainright and duly thanked him for his actions in getting Lamar’s
conviction rescinded. Big Sidney hadn’t heard from his attorney
who handled it for him, so he was surprised and pleased it was done. It
was a great day. Rance stayed with us and Dwayne all that week. Dwayne
was in heaven. His cowboy dad was home again. The Winchesters
understood when Rance was here, Dwayne would probably be staying over
at our place. Still, Dwayne would call everyday to check in with
either Donna or Spencer to let them know he was okay and having a good
time. We all had dinner with Donna and Spencer one night that week and
they came over to our place for dinner on Friday.
Rance and Dwayne
spent a great deal of time at the ranch. They had long talks with Frank
and Curley about what they thought they should do and Rance and Dwayne
went through the house talking about what to get rid of and what to
“You know, Dad,
I don’t wanna’ live here by myself right away. Would you consider
helping me to stay with the Winchesters for a while after I get out of
high school if they’ll let me. They really make me feel wanted and like
I’m family. It’s wonderful when you’re here, but I’ve come to
rely on them. To be honest, I think they’ve become a bit fond of
“I think it
would be a wonderful idea. You can’t have too much family, Son
and they’re fine people. ‘Sides, I don’t like the idea of you
living alone way out here. Frank and Curley are great men to have
around. Hell,— they’re like family, but they have their lives to
live. They can’t provide much companionship for you. Sure, I’d be
willing to see you through a couple of years or so. We could ask them
to set a price for room and board for you. You don’t eat there
all the time anyway.”
* * * * * * *
That summer was
perhaps the best summer of our lives. Little bit was with us
constantly. We didn’t care. We loved him, so did Rance and
my dad. He decided that summer he wanted to be called Logan. He
decided he liked the name better than Sidney. I think it was because
Mr. Wiggins gave him that name. Also, he was growing up, he wanted to
be distinguished for himself and not be confused with big Sidney.
It took everyone a while to get use to it, but we did. By the end
of the summer everyone in town was calling him Logan.
named Logan’s ESP talents, his ‘psychotic’ abilities. He began to
develop his abilities, and he became better at getting into people’s
heads. As he grew, so did his talents. He no longer had to go into a
deep trance. He could do it pretty much anytime he wanted. He
didn’t do it a lot, because his daddy sat him down and gave him a stern
lecture on the right to people’s privacy. Furthermore, big Sidney
insisted as few people as possible know about his talent. Can you
imagine the paranoia and fear it would strike in the hearts of every
politician and military mogul if one man had the ability to tell others
whether they were telling the truth or not? Boggles the mind.
Aside from big
Sidney’s lecture, his daddy always raised him to respect folks privacy,
but once in a while he just couldn’t resist. We could always tell when
he was doing it, he’d look like he was staring off into space deep in
thought. He wasn’t, he was in someone’s head listening.
The other kids
in school accepted him as our buddy and he was included in
everything. Logan began to bloom socially, and he began to date
quite a bit. We would tease him unmercifully about some girl he had a
crush on. We were happy for him, he was a late bloomer, but he decided
he had to try everything at least once. Big Sidney decided for
his senior year in school Logan needed his own transportation and gave
him permission to buy anything he wanted except a Humvee, a sports car
or an expensive status car. Logan decided he wanted a pick up
truck like his big brothers. His dad let him pick the one he
wanted. We went with him several time to look, but he just
couldn’t find the truck he wanted.
bit, tell us what chu’ want and we’ll help you find it.” Dwayne told
him as we were driving from dealership to dealership in San Diego. We’d
spend a good deal of time helping him look.
“I’ll know it
when I see it.” was all he would tell us.
We were getting
pretty frustrated with him. On the way home we were passing
through the many small towns and burgs we had to go through to get back
to our community when Logan yells,
it! Right there! Turn around big brother and let’s go back.”
What he saw was
a late model Ford 3/4 ton pickup with crew cab and a long bed with lots
of extra goodies. It was for sale by a private owner and was
sitting in the front yard. We stopped and looked at it, and Logan
fell in love with it. It was exactly the color combination he was
looking for and had the big crew cab which had more room for people
than the average car. A woman came out who was young and in her
mid-thirties. The truck still had payments to make on it, but she
was asking minimal because it was part of a divorce settlement which it
had to be liquidated quickly.
It was her
husband’s truck. Big Sidney had Sticker take it to his auto-mechanics
to thoroughly check it out, and they found it perfect condition.
It had never been wrecked. Sticker wrote the woman a check and paid off
the balance that afternoon. Sticker took it to his dealer to be
detailed for Logan. It was a handsome truck, and Logan was
thrilled with it. Sticker told big Sidney he thought they got a really
good price for the truck, and his mechanics agreed.
The three of us
spent a great deal of time on the Harding ranch working to help Dwayne
and Rance. Logan surprised Dwayne and I, he was no shirker when
it came to hard work, and he was right there with us every day lending
a hand. That summer he shot up in height until he was almost as
tall as Dwayne and I. We told him it was all the cow shit he’d been
walking in that made him grow. It was good fertilizer. He wondered if
there might not be a grain of truth to it. He was no longer our little
brother; our little bit. Of course, that didn’t stop us from
calling him our little brother or little bit. He loved both
names. He told us he looked upon nicknames others give you as a from of
endearment. Dwayne told him, he was, indeed, a ‘dear.’
I never really
appreciated how much Frank and Curley did around the ranch. They
certainly earned their modest wages Rance was now paying them.
They hadn’t been paid by Sadie or the Colonel in three months.
Rance paid them up what they were owed. When you don’t make a lot
a money you need what little you get as income. They’d lived on their
savings for three months. Now they could put it back. Rance was hoping
to pay them more as they made a profit from the ranch, but that might
not be for a while.
Dunbar had no
idea how to run a ranch and almost ran it into bankruptcy in the two
years he was married to Sadie. She let him take charge. She let
him do it. Dwayne figured, that last six months, his mother was
depending on the Colonel’s income to float the ranch. We wondered
if he let the ranch go almost into bankruptcy to make Sadie dependent
on him. That way, she was more likely to turn her head and ignore what
was going on. We thought that was why he was so bold and arrogant
about his sexual activities. He thought he had her where he wanted her,
and Dwayne wasn’t a threat.
out loud, after the Colonel was thrown in jail and Sadie no longer had
his income to depend on, if she saw the handwriting on the wall, she
was going to lose the ranch anyway, so may as well give it to Rance and
Dwayne to see if they can make a go of it. With Rance’s income they
certainly could and did. It made a profit the second year they owned it
and a profit every year after that.
indeed, raise Frank and Curely’s salaries to where they were sharing in
the profits. It was the most money they made as cowboys in their
lives. Rance remembered what Sticker did for him and how he
treated him. He and Dwayne decided Frank and Curley should be
treated the same way. Rance and Dwayne wanted them know their
hard work was appreciated.
In our running
around the San Diego area Logan noticed a gay S & M leather shop
out near the Naval Station, and we thought it would be great fun to
check it out. It was late summer, I hadn’t bothered to shave in a
couple of days and had a pretty good stubble of beard and
mustache. I certainly looked older than my age. As big as they
were, so did Logan and Dwayne. We looked around for a while when
suddenly Dwayne saw an enormous rubber husband that was made from a
soft pliable material that look for all world like a duplicate of
Lamar’s generous endowment. Dwayne’s eyes lit up like a pinball machine
that just went ‘tilt’ and his mouth began to water.
Logan looked at
me, and I looked at him. We smiled at each other and then broke up
laughing. We didn’t have to be mind readers to figure out what our big
brother had in mind. Dwayne was so shy he couldn’t bring himself to buy
it. I told him to give me the damn thing, I’d buy it for him.
Logan was laughing at the two of us. He had tears running down his
face. That didn’t make it any easier on poor Dwayne. We’d never
seen him so embarrassed. He was bright red from blushing the
whole time I was paying the man for the sex toy. On the way to the
truck Logan turned to me.
“Who’s he gonna’
git to use it on him, bubba?” Logan asked laughing.
“Hell, what’s a
brother for, little bit, if’n we can’t help out our big brother in his
time of need?” I chastised him laughing my ass off.
“You mean you
guys really would help me out?” Dwayne asked sheepishly.
Kidding?! Try’n stop us!” I told him.
bother, but ya’ gotta’ give each of us an equal turn.” Logan
“I was jes’a’
hope’n ya’ll might.” He said grinning real big.
And so it was,
every chance we got we were away to the Harding ranch to help out our
big brother. Of course we helped him with the ranch, too. Dwayne
kept his toy in a cabinet on the back porch where no one would find it.
He certainly wasn’t going to keep it at the Winchester’s. We
agreed with him it might be in poor taste, to say nothing of scaring
poor Donna Winchester to death if she accidentally discovered it. It
had sort of a pinkish flesh color to it, and it wiggled a lot. Logan
named it ‘Pink Floyd.’ I wanted to name it ‘Baby Lamar.’ Dwayne
thought we were awful to have such fun at his expense. He was right, we
were, but that’s what brothers are for.
Then the fates
decided to be mischievous and have a little fun; that’s when
disaster struck. Rance was home for a long weekend and Dwayne and
I went somewhere with little bit. Rance went looking for a
cleaning rag on the back porch. He found a rag and pulled it out
of the cabinet when suddenly ‘Pink Floyd’ rolled out in all its
glory, dropped about four feet to the floor with loud thud, bounced
once and landed right across his cowboy boots. Rance was stunned beyond
belief to find a giant rubber cock laying at his feet.
Then he started
laughing his ass off. He needed no explanation. He knew
immediately what we were up to, and what it was for. He sat on the back
porch steps and laughed until he cried. Frank and Curley walked up to
find out what was wrong with him. He couldn’t tell them, but just
pointed into the back porch for them to take a look. They did,
and they sat on the steps and laughed with him.
This was just
too damn good for Rance to keep the story from the men in our community
who loved Dwayne and would most appreciate it. The men thought
they were going to have to call the paramedics when he told Sheriff
Leland Bard about his incident with ‘Pink Floyd’ bouncing around on the
floor and onto his cowboy boots. Of course, being a cowboy, Rance
embellished his story until it was way out of proportion and painfully
I don’t think
Dwayne ever discovered his dad found ‘Pink Floyd’ before he told him
about it. However, there were many snickers and chuckles from the men
who loved him. The sheriff chastised Rance and told him he should be
ashamed of himself, he thought it was a damn good idea. He was
proud of Dwayne and told Rance he should be, too. All in all, for all
the fun, Rance was proud of his boy for thinking enough of someone else
to see to their happiness and volunteered many evenings to give his boy
a workout with it,— after Rance got thought fucking him, of course.
We worked with
our brother all that year until he could take the damn thing with no
problem,— and I don’t mean just gently. He learned to relax and
take the whole thing the first go. We could fuck him with it for an
hour or more, but he’d snap right back, tight as ever. We told him we
thought we were being rougher on him than the Colonel ever was. He
Our senior year
in high school was the happiest most wonderful year of our lives.
Dwayne and I led our football team to our second year as district
champions. We were on top of the world. Dwayne, Logan and I
became lionized in school. We had no problems getting dates with
any pretty girl we wanted. The editors of the year book did something
unprecedented that year. The first page of the year book had a
big, handsome picture of Dwayne and the year book was dedicated to him.
He had no idea they were going to do it, and it touched him deeply.
I won most
popular student for the third year in a row and Logan was voted
smartest man in school. He was valedictorian of our class. His
grade point average for his four years in high school was a perfect
four-point-oh. No one ever graduated with a higher grade point
average. Because of having Logan for a brother, a lot of times we’d do
our homework together, and he’d teach us tricks how to learn and
memorize things. As a result Dwayne and my grade point average rose
Of course our
little brother gave the valedictory speech at our graduation. He didn’t
tell anyone what he was going to say. We all thought we’d hear the
usual, ‘go forth young fertile minds and make the future yours’
speech. Not Logan. His speech was all about the potential
goodness of all mankind and the importance of reaching out and helping
your brothers. In a round about way it was great testament to our
friendship and everyone got the message. There wasn’t a dry eye
in audience when he finished, and they gave him a standing
ovation. We were right proud of our little
Lamar kept in
constant contact with Dwayne. He would tell him what he was doing and
Dwayne would tell him about what he was doing. Lamar was thrilled to
hear about Dwayne and his dad getting the ranch back from Dwayne’s
mother. He wanted to know all about it and what they were
doing. Lamar couldn’t tell him where he was because he was half
of a team of armed guards for the admiral of the seventh fleet.
He rose in rank quickly and was now Corporal Bradley. He would
accompany the admiral anywhere he went and was regularly seen in
Washington and the pentagon in the company of the admiral. The
admiral particularly like Lamar and was good to him. The Marines
sent him to a six week school to learn protocol and how to be a guard
for a dignitary.
He sent Dwayne
pictures of himself in his full dress uniform, and he really looked
handsome and sharp. Logan and I were so damn jealous we decided
after we cut our brother’s heart out, we’d tar and feather him, and
just for good measure we’d draw and quarter him; then, we laughed our
ass’s off at our silliness. Lamar sent one picture of him and his
partner, the other guard, and they both were in full dress
uniform. The other man was a white man, but almost the same size
as Lamar. He, too, was huge. Dwayne had a picture of Lamar framed and
sitting on his desk at the Winchester’s. Lamar and Dwayne wrote
and exchanged e-mails several times a week, but they were very careful
not to write anything that might be misconstrued. The only terms
of endearment they exchanged was ‘dear brother.’ They could read
between the lines, though, and each knew the other was still very much
Just like he
planned, Lamar got his two weeks leave at the end of his first year as
a Marine and he flew to San Diego to be with his love for his
eighteenth birthday. He wrote to Dwayne he had no more family but
our community. He felt more at home with us than anywhere else.
Dwayne was thrilled Lamar was coming for his birthday. Everyone
was happy for him. Dwayne wanted us all to go to the airport with
him, but Rance told him ‘no.’ He should go alone in his new truck to
pick him up.
agreed with his dad and drove to the airport by himself. He was
standing watching all the people get off the plane until finally he saw
his love, proud, handsome and tall in his dress uniform. He
looked spectacular. Lamar saw his young, handsome cowboy, in his
boots and big hat, standing there with the biggest smile on his face,
and his heart damn near skipped a beat. He forgot just how imposing and
fine looking his little buddy was and how much he love the sight of
him. They hugged but didn’t kiss more than on the cheek. It was a
brotherly welcome; totally acceptable in public. However, when they got
to Dwayne’s pickup with the heavily tinted windows, it was a horse of a
different color. They kissed a kiss of welcome and passion that
was at once as gentle as it was moving for both of them. They finally
broke it off and sat there for a minute.
“Ready to go
home, my beautiful giant?”
“Them’s the best
words I’ve heard all week, Son.” Lamar answered.
“I love you,
“I love you,
too, baby boy. Oh, shit, after tomorrow I ain’t gonna’ be able to
call you my ‘baby boy’ no more.”
“You can call me
anything you want to, big man, and I’ll come a’ running.” Dwayne
replied. Lamar laughed. “You look so damn handsome in your uniform. I’m
so proud of you. I’m glad you wore it. Everyone is there
waiting for you. I wanted them all to come with me to the airport, but
my daddy told me ‘no,’ I should come by myself in my new truck to pick
you up. My dad is usually right about a lot of things. I’m kinda
glad I did. I don’t have to share you with anyone for a little
“I’m glad you
did, too, baby boy. I gets all nervous when a lot of people are talk’n
to me at the same time. Now, when we git to the ranch I won’t have any
problem. I knows all them good folks. I loves them all.”
“They love you,
too, Corporal Bradley.” Dwayne winked at him. “I love calling you
that.” He smiled.
“Good boy, you
should show proper respect for even a noncommissioned officer.”
Lamar smiled, “This truck is a beauty, Son. When you said pickup
truck, I was thinking a beat up old cowboy truck. This thing is
really nice. It’s comfortable even for me. My head don’t touch
the roof like in all them cars we have to ride in with the admiral.”
about a lot of things, and they were really relaxed by the time they
got to the Longhorn ranch. It was early afternoon and dad, Rance,
Logan, the Winchesters, big Sidney, Sticker, and me were all there
waiting for him to say ‘hello’ and ‘welcome.’ They all would be
there tomorrow as well for Dwayne’s birthday. We decided to
celebrate our birthdays separately that year. Somehow, it just
seemed right since this was a special birthday for the three of us.
Logan wouldn’t turn eighteen ‘til the second week in August and, he was
really jealous of Dwayne and I. I told him I’d get a knife from
the kitchen, and he could cut my heart out later. He laughed.
Logan and I used
his printer and made a huge banner we hung across the post of the front
stairs up to the porch of the house that read: ‘Welcome Home Corporal
Bradley.’ Dwayne said Lamar got choked up for a minute when he saw the
banner. He turned to Dwayne.
“It’s so good to
see all their faces again. That Mr. Wiggins is a fine looking
man, ain’t he, boy?”
“Yeah, he is,
but not as handsome as my Marine Corporal.”
“Ain’t a one of
‘em prettier’n you, baby boy, and don’t chu’ forget it! I got me a
pur-tee little cowboy to love.” He smiled as they came to a stop.
“Yes, you do,—
and I got me a handsome Marine Corporal to love.”
Everyone was at
Dwayne’s truck. Dad was the first to get to Lamar. He threw
his arms around him, gave him a big hug and a kiss on the cheek.
“Damn, Son, you
look so fine and handsome in that uniform. Welcome home, Son.”
“Thank you, Mr.
Longhorn. I’s s’glad to be here. I appreciate you asking me to stay
with you, Sir.”
Next was Mr.
Wiggings and Sidney Wainright. Lamar had a big hug and kiss for
each of them and shook their hands.
“I wanna’ thank
you men for all you done for me. I won’t never forget it, Mr.
Wiggins, and Mr. Wainright. I shore’ appreciate it.”
Son. Welcome home.” Sidney said for both of them.
Little bit was
next and Lamar had a big old hug and a special kiss for him.
Logan was giggling like a school boy, but we’d all ready graduated.
“Look at chu,’
boy! You ain’t no ‘little bit’ no more! You’re almost as tall as
them yahoos. You been a good boy, or is Corporal Lamar gonna’
have to turn you over his knee?”
Bradley, I’ve been so bad, Sir. I deserve a good spanking,
Sir!” Logan said contritely.
hugged and kissed Logan again and promised he’d take care of him
later. Little bit laughed.
Winchesters greeted him and welcomed him home. If a black
man could glow, I’m sure Lamar was at that moment. Last but not least
was Dwayne’s dad, Rance Harding.
Lamar stuck out his hand and Rance took his bigger hand and shook it.
“Ah, hell, Son,
that ain’t gonna’ get it, gimme’ a hug.”
“Yes, Sir, Mr.
Harding.” Lamar hugged and kissed Rance on the cheek.
“And for God’s
sake, call me Rance, Son.” He laughed.
“Yes, Sir. Thank
you, Sir. I appreciate that, Sir.” He smiled and Rance laughed
more at his politeness.
“You’re a fine
young man, Lamar,— you’re welcome here, Son.”
“I feel like I’m
Son.” Rance assured him.
Dwayne and I
managed to break down the huge bed in my ‘junk room’ the three of us
played on from time to time and moved it across the hall to a room we
fixed up for him and Lamar. Logan helped us repaint the whole
room, clean and wax the floors. In a trunk in the attic we found
some beautiful Oriental rugs we cleaned and placed on the floor. We
added a chest of drawers from my junk room. I wanted to get that
stuff out of my junk room anyway to have more room. The room was
at the far end of the hall and was one of the four out of six upstairs
bedrooms with windows on two sides for cross ventilation. It was
a nice room when we finished. Dwayne helped Lamar with his sea bag and
they stored it in the big room. Lamar took one look at the bed and got
a big smile on his face.
“Now, that’s a
bed a man can sleep on.” He said.
“That ain’t all
you gonna’ be doing in that bed, big man.” Dwayne said under his breath
and then chuckled.
We all laughed.
We left the room to leave them alone for a while. I closed the door
behind us. Lamar took Dwayne into his arms and looked down at
him. Dwayne was a bigger man than either me or little bit and
this man towered over him. Many times when you see an unusually tall
man he will be skinny; not Lamar. He was as broad at the
shoulders as he was imposing in height. It was as if the huge bed was
made for him in mind. He gently kissed Dwayne on his forehead.
“You ready for
tomorrow night, sweet baby?”
“Sure am, big
man, I can’t wait. I been drive’n my brothers and dads crazy talk’n
“Not a bit.
Should I be?”
know’s how big I am, Son.”
certainly do remember.” Dwayne smiled real big, “I remember ever’ inch
of it. It’s burned into my memory like it was yesterday, and if I need
a reminder I can watch the video. You don’t how many times your
beautiful cock has all ready been made love to in my dreams and you
jes’ don’t know it.” Dwayne laughed and Lamar laughed, too.
“Ya’ll saved a
copy of the video?”
bit made copies for each of us. I told him not to give me mine until my
birthday. I told him I wanted the unedited one where it shows me
sucking on your big dick and you stealing a kiss from me when the
Colonel weren’t look’n.”
“Can we watch it
“Sure, I’d love
to. Will it bother you to see yourself git shot?”
“We can turn it
off before then, can’t we?’
“What about the
“Logan made me a
copy of that, too.”
“That’s what I
“It’s the one
what’s got the love in it.”
that, my handsome giant.”
“Lemme’ git out
a’ this uniform before I git some’um on it. Are those drawers for
us to use, baby boy?”
“While I undress
would you mind unpacking my bag and putting things in those drawers. I
don’t care where, jes’ long’s I can find ever’ thing. What I wanna’
wear is way down at the bottom.”
Corporal Bradley, Sir.” Dwayne said with respect.
unpacking and watched Lamar undress at the same time. He carefully hung
up his uniform and put it in the closet. He removed every thing
else and placed his mirror polished shoes in the closet as well.
He took off his shirt and was down to his GI issue underwear. He
didn’t hesitate, and took his wife-beater undershirt off and threw it
on the bed. He dropped his boxer shorts to the floor. Lamar was
even bigger than Dwayne remembered him.
clearly see the scar where the bullet entered his chest just below his
massive pectoral muscle. Dwayne hadn’t forgotten how large he was below
his waist. He couldn’t have picked a better rubber husband to
expand his horizons. Lamar was at least that big or maybe just a
little bigger. Dwayne reached down to the bottom of Lamar’s bag
and brought out a huge pair of Western boots, a pair of big Wrangler
jeans and a beautiful Western shirt. Lamar grinned real big at
“I wanted to fit
in.” He said shyly.
handsome boots, just like their owner.”
dressed and stood before Dwayne. He made as handsome a cowboy as
he did a Marine Corporal.
“Lamar,— is it
my imagination, or are you bigger than you were a year ago?” Dwayne
“I hope to hell
it ain’t chore’ imagination, Son. I worked my black ass off for this
extra mass. I’s glad ya’ noticed,— that’s really sweet of
you. I done it jes’ fer you, baby boy. I told myself you’d
“How could I
help? You really are bigger; much bigger! I’ll be curious to see if
anyone else notices. In the meantime, kiss me cowboy.”
They kissed a
kiss full of love and joy. It wasn’t a tongue battle or swallowing
contest. It was kiss of two men in love with each other who knew
more love is conveyed through a gentle and tender kiss.
The two men went
downstairs and several mouths dropped open. Lamar went up the stairs a
handsome, squared away, sharp looking Marine Corporal and came down the
stairs a big, handsome, black cowboy.
a-mighty,— would ya’ll look at what jes’ come down them steps.” said my
dad. He went to Larmar and patted him on the back. “You’re
looking fine, Son.”
“If you call my
brother, Rance, by his first name, you think you kin call me, Vince,
“Thank you, Sir,
I appreciate it. It’s so good to see all ya’ll again. I told
Dwayne on the way, I feel more at home here with you folks than
the way we want you to feel, Son!” Barked Sticker. “I’d tell ya’
to relax and let chore’ hair down, but ya’ ain’t got none.”
“Naw, Sir, I had
some kind of illness when I was a young boy and all my hair fell out.
It never grew back. I’ve been bald most of my life.”
“I’m sorry, Son,
I didn’t know.”
“Don’t be sorry,
Mr. Wiggins, I ain’t. Its saved me a fortune in haircuts.”
laughed. Dwayne knew Lamar was going to fit right in with these
folks,— and there was one other place he had in mind for his giant to
fit into. They had dinner together. Everyone brought something.
Sticker and Sidney volunteered to bring steaks if Vince would cook them
on the grill outside over mesquite. Donna Winchester brought another
wonderful dessert. We provided salad and a vegetable.
Dwayne and Rance cooked up the cowboy fried potatoes.
Later in the
evening Lamar and Dwayne lay together on the big bed with Lamar holding
his love in his arms pressing his body close to his. They made
sweet love and whispered outrageous things to each other lovers have
done since the beginning of time . They were tempted to wait until
midnight and then,—
“No! Damn it!
We’ve come this far, baby boy. We can wait ‘til tomorrow night.”
Lamar said with authority.
Corporal Bradley, Sir.” Dwayne replied.
Dwayne close to his big, warm body all night and would wake
occasionally to buss a kiss behind his love’s ear, sigh deeply and
return to a deep peaceful sleep. It seem like they’d come so far
together. They were separated; but yet, they made an effort to
keep in touch all year. Dwayne didn’t know why God brought him
this giant to love, but he wasn’t going to worry about it. He did
say a small prayer of thanks for bringing him and Lamar together.
If God is love He surely must have been in the room with them that
evening, smiling, satisfied with Himself and thinking,
‘I done real
good,— git’n them two together.’
End Chapter 20 ~
Copyright 2005 ~