Date: Thu, 14 Sep 2023 12:18:15 -0500 From: Troy Subject: That Special One - Part VI That Special one – Part VI By Troy M lookatmenow.7283@gmail.com Please consider donating to the nifty organization. Startled by that statement I looked up and into Sean's Ocean blue eyes and just stared at him. No words were spoken. It was the first time I had seen him in years now. I had a million thoughts running through my head on what to say, how I wanted to say it, but nothing came out other than, "Why are you here Sean? I have already told you I'm done. Just pretend I don't exist like everyone else in our family and others do." He just looked at me with this odd look, one that I don't believe I had ever seen before. "Well for one, I'm here because I wanted to see the play you wrote, two to see you. And after that play, and the critics remarks, I don't think it's going to be possible for you to be invisible anymore. It was quite amazing; you certainly do have a talent and I now understand why you received the drama desk award back in high school. And third, can we go inside it's cold out here and I want to talk for real." I just looked at him, and asked again, "Why are you here? What do you want from me? I'm tired of getting my hopes up and then having them crushed every single time. I'm done." And then I noticed something he was carrying a backpack. In all my life he's never carried anything with him. And as smart as he is, as I wrapped the blanket around me, I noticed that the price tag was still on it. Now things were starting to make sense in my head. If he had been living at home my parents threw him out or he had been living with a girlfriend and she threw him out and my parents said no to him coming home and now he needed a place to stay as to why he keeps asking to go inside. So, I finally just said to him, "Sure, we can go inside, but you have to tell me first, where are you living now?" He just continued staring at me and didn't say anything. I knew I was right. He had nowhere to go and figured that I would take him in. "Where are you living?" He finally opened his mouth to speak, "Fine, you got me. I have no place to stay. My now ex-girlfriend threw me out and mom and dad won't let me stay with them. I need your help, Troy. Not only for a place to stay but for a lot of things. You were right, just as you usually are. Everything fell apart and I had nowhere or anyone to turn to. And then I remembered what you said in the hospital, and I was hoping it still holds true." I started to laugh and couldn't stop laughing. "You are just too much. You just think we can have the conversation we had then you disappear and now that you have fallen flat on your face, that I'm going to come and rescue you? And not only that but must deal with all of the feelings that I have for you, that I have worked for a very long time to learn how to deal with in my life. You know something Troy, maybe it's time you didn't get rescued or could just float by on your looks and whatever else you've used people for. Maybe, it's finally time for you to learn a lesson and understand what it's like to feel tortured for years on end with a feeling of it being that way for eternity. I love you Sean, I always have, and I always will. But I'm not going to let myself drawn into a situation where I get my hopes up again and then have them destroyed by you all over again." I saw a look of shock on his face, hell I had shocked myself by what I just said. But enough was enough. I wasn't going to do this anymore. And I just said, "Let's go, you can stay at my place tonight and then we'll figure out for where you can go." I motioned him to follow me, and he caught up very quickly to walk beside me instead of behind me. There were no words to be spoken at this point. As we walked into my apartment, it was nothing fancy just a simple 1 bedroom with a decent sized living room. Once inside we both just stood there, we were at a crossroad here as to how things were going to progress. In my heart and half my brain, I wanted to drag him into bed with me and just sleep in his arms. But at the same time, I wanted him to suffer a little bit too. And apparently the more vindictive side of me took over me. "The couch pulls out into a queen I'll get you some sheets and a blanket." He just nodded at me and dropped his bag. I gave him the sheets, blanket and pillow showed him the bathroom and then said that I was going to bed and went into my bedroom and closed the door. I undressed and got into bed and just lay there thinking unable to sleep. Too many thoughts running through my head about the multitude of events that had happened tonight. I had opening night to my first produced play that apparently got rave reviews, and my brother-the man that I love more than anything in the world shows up asking for help because as I knew it would, has fallen flat on his face and had no where to turn but to come to me and ask for help. The man that I love most in the world, that my life has almost revolved around is sleeping on my couch on the other side of the wall in front of me, and while I desperately want him in the bed with me here, I just can't fall down this hole again. It's that good old catch 22 I'm damned if I do and damned if I don't. I must have fallen asleep at some point because the next thing I knew the sun was coming through the windows and my phone was ringing. I picked it up and groggily answered, "Hello??" "Have you read the paper yet?? Have you read the paper yet?" Mike was almost screaming into the phone. "No Mike I haven't, I haven't even gotten out of bed yet. I had an odd night to say the least. Just tell me. Good or bad?" "No. Get your ass out of bed and go get the paper and read the reviews yourself." And then he just hung up. I dragged myself out of bed put on a pair of shorts opened my door and first saw Sean sitting at my table drinking coffee and reading the paper and got slapped in the face again with the realization of what had had happened last night. Coffee. Yes, I need that. "Good morning and thank you for the bed. Don't know where I would have gone so I really appreciate it. Coffee is ready go have some, and then you need to see this." Pointing to the paper. So, I poured my coffee into the cup and finally went to pick up the paper to see the reviews. One after another 5 stars, `a must see', `Don't miss this'. I really had succeeded. I started to say something to Sean but then got cut off by the phone ringing again. "Well did you read it? YOU did it. My phone has been non-stop all morning, I've got 6 producers that want plays from you. Dude, you made it!!" I just sat there in silence staring at the paper and then looking up at Sean, who had this bright smile on and what looked like pride in his beautiful eyes. "Earth to Troy!!" "Sorry Mike I'm still in shock over the whole thing. I did not expect this type of reaction. I'm still trying to work it all out in my head." "Well work it out, pull yourself together, and I'll need you in my office tomorrow. We have a lot to go through and make decisions on. But congratulations you did it!!" And then he quickly hung up. I looked over at Sean and he still had this smile on his face. "I'm sure you have a lot to take care of Troy, but I'm really proud of you. Your work was truly incredible, and you deserve all those accolades. But anyway, I'll get out of your way. Thank you again for the bed last night I really appreciate it." He got up and started to put things into his bag and looked like he was getting ready to leave. "Sean?" "Yea?" "Please stay with me." "Are you sure? I mean after what you said last night, I can understand why you wouldn't want me here. I wouldn't want me here either. And I'm sorry for all of that. You didn't deserve it." "Yes, I'm sure. I don't know what's going to happen between us. But what I do know is that I don't want you to leave now. I want you to stay with me here." He just stood there staring at me. "I called my friend Steve; he said I could stay with him. But if you want me to stay here instead then I will." "I do Sean, please don't leave me again. I want you here with me even if just a roommate. Just don't leave me again." He slowly walked over to me and looked into my eyes, into me. "Then it's settled. I will stay with you; the pull-out is perfectly fine for me. I won't leave you until you tell me to." "Thank you, Sean. It really means a lot to me for you to be here right now." I wanted to say that I want you to be here forever. But I wasn't going to push my luck. I'd take what I could get for the time being. In the midst of my thoughts, I felt 2 arms being wrapped around me. And he just whispered in my ear, "It's good to be back with you again. I've missed you, and I know it's my fault. But I'm glad that I'm here now and I'm not going anywhere unless you tell me to." I was Just stunned. I had no idea what to say. I was just melting into his arms. I would probably set myself up for a complete disaster if things went sour. But I was putty in his hands at this point – literally and figuratively and I didn't care what the future ramifications could be I had him here – at least for now. Thank you to all who responded – all comments welcome at lookatmenow.7283@gmail.com I apologize that the releases are slow – it's a difficult story to write and I want to ensure that everything is coming out correctly. Thank you for your patience.