This posting describes an intense sexual scene between a nineteen year-old and his eleven year-old brother. If you are offended by homosexuality, incest, and inter-generational relations, or if it is illegal for you to access or read such material wherever you are, please do not read any further. The sex in this story is important to the plot. The story is a fantasy. Please understand the difference between fantasy and acting on fantasies. The author does not condone the violation of any laws or the harming of children in any way! The setting of Springfield in the story does not refer to any actual city by that name, but is used as a generic name, which is often used in television and fiction.
Please write to me at: montag154@ gmail.com.
Plus, I have a blog to go along with the story at: montag154@blogspot.com
The
Way We Are
by Montag
Chapter One
A brilliant afternoon sun shone down upon me as I stood naked and erect in the center of a lush Alpine meadow. A cool breeze blew across my naked skin as I gazed round at the surrounding mountain peaks covered in pristine snow and I felt a sense of elation for my freedom. Ecstatically, I threw my arms into the air as I laughed with joy. Behind, I could hear an answering laugh and turned to find a dozen boys, all equally naked and erect, running toward me and waving. They were beautiful, with bright blond hair, so much prettier than my own obnoxious red, and clear, alabaster complexions devoid of the freckles I was sure disfigured my own face. They were my friends; I loved them and they loved me. Often we would run down the mountainside to Salzburg (fully clothed, of course, though still usually erect) to sit in an outdoor café and eat chocolate pastries while listening to Mozart. Today, however, there would be no Salzburg, no chocolate pastries, no Mozart, for as they gathered round me, we all hugged and kissed and caressed before falling to the ground in a writhing, twisting mass of loving boyhood...
‟Quit touching me.”
‟I’m not touching you.”
‟Yes, you are. Quit touching me.”
‟I’m not touching you. You’re touching me.”
I looked up from the remains of my spaghetti dinner and sighed with a sickening feeling in my stomach as I realized with a dreadful letdown that I wasn’t in some Rogers and Hammerstein fantasy with my Austrian love boys, but sitting in the kitchen of my family’s home somewhere in the middle of America as The Vermin began yet another skirmish in their long and senseless war of humiliation against each other. My mother was standing at the kitchen sink, smoking a cigarette and washing the skillet in which she had prepared the marinara sauce while a commercial played on the radio beside her.
‟Hi ho, hey hey, chew your little troubles away! Hi ho, hey hey, chew Wrigley’s Spearmint Gum!”
‟I’m not touching you, you liar. You’re touching me!”
‟You’re the liar, Liar!”
I rolled my eyes and looked back down at my plate as I scooped up the last bit of pasta and sauce and put it in my mouth. Mother sighed and set the skillet in the dishwasher before turning and walking out of the kitchen to the living room.
‟Harrison Ford has the best deals in Springfield on all ‘69 model Mustangs, Galaxie 500’s, and LTD’s in their summer close-out sale. All cars must move before the new 1970 models arrive this fall and your friends at Harrison Ford are ready to deal! Harrison Ford, where they treat you right!”
‟If you don’t quit touching me, I’m gonna kill you!”
‟If you kill me, I’ll kill you!”
‟You can’t kill me if you’re already dead.”
‟It’s eighty-nine degrees right now at the More Music Station where we play all the hits, Seventy-five, WRX, just what the doctor ordered, with the number one song on the charts for the second week in a row, The Beatles and ‘Get Back!’”
‟I can if I come back as a ghost!”
‟You won’t ‘cause you’ll be in Hell and the Devil won’t let you out!”
‟Jo Jo was a man who thought he was a loner, but he knew it wouldn’t last.”
I looked up with disgust at The Vermin as I swallowed my last bite of spaghetti and slid my chair back.
‟Jo Jo left his home in Tucson Arizona for some California grass!”
‟What’s the matter with you, Sissy Chrissy?”
‟Yeah, Sissy Chrissy!” What’s the matter with you?”
‟Get back! Get back! Get back to where you once belonged!”
Immediately, I looked down and stood up, hoping they would just forget about me and return to their own battle as I picked up my dishes. I softly answered, ‟Nothing.”
‟Get back! Get back! Get back to where you once belonged! Get back, Jo Jo!”
‟Come on, Sissy Chrissy. What’s the matter?”
‟Yeah, what’s the matter, Sissy Chrissy?”
I stopped at the kitchen counter and dropped my dishes into the sink before I suddenly spun around and replied, ‟You know, all you ever do is fight. That’s all you ever do. And, it’s always about stupid stuff. You never fight about anything worthwhile. It’s all just stupid. Don’t you ever get tired of fighting? Why can’t you just shut up for once?”
The Vermin looked at me with surprise for a moment before they maliciously grinned and turned their heads toward the living room, happily wailing in unison, ‟Mommy, Chrissy’s bein’ mean to us!”
‟Yeah, Chrissy’s bein’ bossy!”
‟Yeah, Chrissy’s tellin’ us to shut up!”
My shoulder’s slumped and I rolled my eyes in exasperation as I turned around and began to rinse off my plate. From the living room, I heard the predictable response from our mother, ‟Shut the shit up in there! All of you! I’m sick of your shit! If you don’t shut up, I’m gonna come in there and slap the shit out of you!”
I shuddered with disgust and allowed my mind to wander back to Austria while I cleaned my dishes. At least, there no one fought all the time or called me names or used the ‟s” word at least once in every sentence! As images of my naked blind boyfriends danced before me, I leaned over and opened the dishwasher and inserted my dishes.
‟Sweet Loretta Martin thought she was a woman, but she was another man. All the girls around they say she’s got it comin’, but she takes it where she can.”
Suddenly, and I didn’t know why, I stood up and abruptly turned the radio off. As I turned around, The Vermin looked aggrieved and I was certain they were going to start whining again. I gave them a look and, instead, one of them got a calculating look on it’s face.
‟How come you’re all dressed up, Sissy Chrissy?”
‟I’m not dressed up,” I replied. Actually, I was. I had put on my new Madras shorts and my new white crocodile shirt, but I wasn’t going to concede anything to Them.
‟Are ya goin’ out with Thady again?”
‟Yeah, are ya goin’ out on a date with Thady?”
‟I’m not going out on a date!” I replied sharply. ‟Thad’s taking me to the Symphony in the Park tonight!”
They both rolled their eyes and one of Them replied, ‟That’s dorky. Thad’s a doofus.”
‟He is not!” I replied hotly. ‟He’s the coolest guy in the world! He’s the nicest guy in the world!”
‟He’s a wussy sissy like you.”
‟He’s our brother!”
‟He’s not out brother! Mommy said so!”
‟He is our brother!” I replied with sudden fury. ‟Just because he had a different mother doesn’t mean he’s not our brother! He’s our half-brother, but he’s still our brother! Daddy wouldn’t want you saying stuff like that.”
‟Well, Daddy’s dead!”
I flinched as if they had slapped me. They both looked at me with worry for a moment as I looked back at them with shock and then outrage. I couldn’t trust myself not to go crazy if I said anything in response, so I just strode past them. Before, I could leave the kitchen, however, one of Them cried out, ‟Mommy! Chrissy has a stiffy again!”
‟Sissy Chrissy has a stiffy!”
‟Stiffy Chrissy! Stiffy Chrissy!”
I wanted to die! I stopped in the middle of the dining room before my mother in the living room could see me. With my face burning with embarrassment, I looked down in horror and saw that I was indeed hard as a rock. It was probably left over from my little mental sojourns to Austria, though underneath, I also knew it was part of The Problem! I shoved my hands into my pockets in the hope I could hide it from my mother and walked on into the living room.
I was hoping to escape before Mother said anything. She was sitting on the couch, smoking her inevitable cigarette and flipping though one of her many movie and gossip magazines as I strode past the television and toward the front door.
‟Where are you going?” she demanded just as I grabbed the door knob, thinking I was about to escape unscathed.
‟I’m going to wait for Thad on the front porch.”
She scowled and then demanded, ‟Can’t you get yourself under control any better than that?”
‟What do you mean?” I asked nervously, knowing exactly what she meant, but hoping she would just sigh and let it go. She didn’t.
‟You know what I mean. You’re a damn pervert.”
I opened the door and stepped forward as the hot air from outside flowed through the screen door and over me. I was unable to look at my mother. I stared out the screen, my face flushing fiercely, and replied in a tight voice, ‟I’m not a pervert. I can’t help it. The doctor said it’s a nervous condition.”
‟Bullshit!” my mother replied vehemently. ‟You’re a boy! Boy’s don’t get nervous! That’s just an excuse. You’re a pervert, just like your God-damned grandfather!”
I closed my eyes in utter humiliation and horror that my mother would speak so openly about The Problem. Usually, she would make a snide comment, but never before had she directly addressed it as she just had. I didn’t know how to react. I was mortified.
‟And, I’m not so sure I want you spending so much time with your Daddy’s little bastard, either!”
My eyes grew wide with outrage as I stared at her. She was standing now, having thrown her magazine aside as her fury grew unchecked.
‟He’s... he’s not Daddy’s little bastard! He’s our brother! How can you be so hateful? Why are you so mean to me?”
I knew I shouldn’t have said that, but she had hurt me so and I was so angry at what she had said about Thad that I couldn’t stop myself. I paid the price.
Mother’s face grew instantly scarlet and her eyes flamed as he strode toward me, her hand raised. I immediately stepped outside, thinking she would never hit me in front of the neighbors. I was wrong.
She burst threw the door and struck me repeatedly about the face and shoulders as I stood on the lawn trying to shield myself with my arms from her blows as she screamed, ‟You God damn shit ass! Shit ass! You God damned pervert! Shit ass pervert! God damn it!”
I was only vaguely aware that a car had pulled up in front of the house or that several people were shouting at us. Mother was still screaming vile and hateful things as she slapped and hit me and I was crying, ‟Stop it! Stop, Mother! Stop it!”
Suddenly, I was jerked aside and fell to the ground. I looked up and found a college-age man with shaggy strawberry blond curls and flips about his head, Madras shorts and a white crocodile shirt (just like me), and loafers without socks, standing between Mother and me with his hands grasping Mother’s arms as she cursed and screamed and struggled.
‟Carolyn! Stop it!” Thad yelled at her. ‟Get control of yourself! Stop it!”
After a moment, Mother finally stopped struggling. She stood before Thad, panting, her hair in a mess, and mascara streaming down her cheeks. She then burst into tears and dramatically fell to the ground.
‟You don’t know what it’s like!” she wailed. ‟You don’t know what it’s like!”
‟What’s is the matter with you?” Thad demanded as he looked down at her with disgust.
Mother simply repeated her mantra over and over. Several neighbors had rushed over and were now standing around us, watching with shock and disgust.
‟Should I call the police?” a woman asked.
‟I don’t know,” Thad replied. He turned to me and asked, ‟Are the other kids all right?”
I nodded and Thad looked at the front screen. They were standing on the other side watching with shock. Thad looked down at Mother and asked with disgust, ‟Do we need to call the police, Carolyn?”
Mother simply shook her head as she bawled pathetically and repeated, ‟You don’t know what it’s like!”
‟I don’t care what it’s like!” Thad declared. ‟There’s nothing that boy could have done to justify you attacking him like that! Nothing!”
‟You don’t know...”
‟Oh, shut up.”
Thad turned around and knelt before me.
‟Are you okay, Chris?”
I swallowed and nodded as I wiped the tears from my face with my wrist. He stood and helped me to my feet. With a gentle hand on my shoulder, he said softly, ‟Go get in the car. I’ll be along in a minute.”
I nodded and, horrified that the neighbors had seen my mother slapping and hitting me and screaming as if she were crazy, I dropped my head and trudged toward his old, black Volkswagen while Thad faced my mother again.
‟Chris is going to spend the night at my place,” Thad began.
Mother interrupted with, ‟The hell he is!”
‟Or I will call Child Protection as soon as I get home. You understand? I don’t think you want to lose your kids and I swear to God in front of all your neighbors, if I hear of you going off like this again, I will call Child Protection. Do you understand?”
I was standing by the car and looked back as Mother looked up at him with hatred in her eyes.
‟I said, do you understand?” Thad said firmly.
Mother nodded once. Thad sighed and said, ‟Good. I will come by here in the morning and we’ll talk about what’s best for Chris in the future.”
And, with that, he turned around and marched toward the car. I opened the passenger door and climbed in, my face burning with humiliation. I couldn’t look out the window; I sat with my face down.
Thad climbed in and slammed his door. He took several deep breaths and then turned to me. He gently placed his hand on my face and softly said, ‟It’s going to be okay, Chrissy. Don’t worry. Everything’s going to be just fine.”
I swallowed, but said nothing. He added, ‟I don’t think we’ll go to the concert. I think maybe we should just go to my place. How’s that sound?”
Silently, I nodded and Thad leaned over and kissed the side of my head. He started the car and we pulled away from the house.
A couple of times as we drove, Thad asked what had caused Mother to go off on my like that, but I couldn’t talk. I just sniffed and shook my head, afraid that I might start crying in front of my hero, my big brother, and that was something I could never do.
After a few minutes of driving through an older neighborhood of small, but fashionable homes, we pulled into an alley behind a building on University Avenue. I looked up with my red eyes and asked, ‟Is this where you live?”
Thad nodded and smiled, replying, ‟Yeah, I told my mom to drop dead and moved out over the Memorial Day holiday. I seem to getting good at telling crazy-ass mothers where to go. I’ve got this really cool place upstairs above the bookstore! It was like this storeroom and the landlord built a bathroom and a kitchen and then there’s this huge room. It’s the coolest place. You’ll really love it.”
I swallowed and nodded doubtfully and as he got out of the car, I slowly opened my door and carefully climbed out. I followed Thad as he unlocked a door and entered a narrow hallway that led through the building to the sidewalk out front. We walked to the front, climbed the stairs and entered another locked door.
He was right. It was cool and I did love it. It was a long room with the kitchen and bath in the middle and a bed and dresser at the opposite end, an old couch with a giant wooden spool as a coffee table, and several bookshelves made of boards and cinder blocks containing books, record albums and a stereo. There were several old easy chairs, lots of hanging plants, and the coolest posters on the wall. One was for the Springfield Ballet and showed both male and female dancers in various positions. Another was for an exhibition of French Impressionism at the Springfield Museum of Art. There was a movie poster for West Side Story, a poster for The Rolling Stones and one for The Doors, and a few Escher and Dali prints. At the far end, near his bed, were a couple of easels with canvases on them. One of the canvases was a garden scene that I recognized as being from one of the parks nearby. The other was of a naked teenage boy.
A naked teenage boy? I stared at the picture in shock. He was strong and muscled, with curly brown hair and he was sitting on a stool and... his wiener was quite exposed!
Quickly I turned away and saw Thad grinning at me.
‟Well, what do you think of the place?”
‟It’s really cool,” I replied. ‟It’s neat.”
Thad grinned and led me toward the couch. Outside the windows, I looked down at University Avenue and saw the evening traffic moving past the full sidewalks and the various bars and cafés and shops. The windows were open and a nice cool breeze drifted in along with the sounds of the street below.
‟Have a seat,” Thad said in a friendly voice. ‟Would you like a Coke?”
I nodded as I carefully sat down on the couch. He smiled and walked over to the stereo and turned on the receiver to the local FM rock station and set the volume low. As The Velvet Underground came on, he walked over to the kitchen area, which was separated from the living room area by a bar with stools. I sat on the edge of the couch, my knees close together, my hands clasped tightly in my lap, until I suddenly felt an overwhelming rush of emotion. I supposed it must have been a delayed reaction, but by the time Thad returned with a couple of bottles of Coke, I had begun to bawl my eyes out.
Thad quickly set the bottles on the big wooden spool and sat down beside me. He wrapped his arms around me and held me tightly as he whispered, ‟It’s okay, Chrissy. Go ahead and let it out. It’s all right.”
I don’t know how long I cried, but after awhile, my sobs slowly diminished and finally exhausted themselves. Still holding me with his right arm, Thad reached over to the coffee table and picked up a Kleenex box. I blew my nose a couple of times, wiped my eyes and smiled with embarrassment.
‟Hey,” he whispered, his mouth close to my face, ‟don’t be embarrassed. I still cry and I’m nineteen.”
He kissed me on the forehead and then hugged me tightly.
It felt so wonderful to feel my big brother, my hero, my Thad holding me, his strong arms wrapped tightly around me, and I melted into him, feeling like a sissy, but not caring. It just felt so wonderful that I didn’t care. I was also getting hard again, but I was sure he wasn’t going to notice. He wasn’t looking down at my crotch and since we were sitting, it wouldn’t be that noticeable anyway.
In the dim light of the apartment, as the breeze from the windows behind us caressed our skin and the sounds of the street provided a soft background noise, Thad pulled away slowly and smiled down at me.
‟So, tell me what happened.”
I closed my eyes. I was afraid he would do this. I didn’t know what to say. How could I tell him what happened without mentioning The Problem? And, if I told him about The Problem, would he freak out and not want to be my brother anymore? What would I do if Thad wasn’t in my life anymore? There would be no one left who gave a damn about me. No, I couldn’t say anything.
‟I don’t want to talk about it.”
Thad cocked his head and said sympathetically, ‟Little guy, I have to know so I’ll know how to deal with your mother tomorrow.”
‟What are you going to do?”
Thad shrugged and said, ‟Oh, I’ve got some ideas, but it all really depends on what happened tonight. What set her off?”
I looked down in shame, suddenly wanting to be somewhere else. I shook my head and said, ‟I just... I can’t tell you. Please, Thad. I just can’t tell you.”
Thad nodded and sat back. After a long moment, he quietly said, ‟Chrissy, I want you to know that there is absolutely nothing you could tell me that would make me think any less of you. You are a bright and witty and decent kid and I’m your big brother and I love you and I always will. You can trust me with anything and you can tell me anything. I promise. And, to be perfectly honest, there’s probably nothing that you could tell me that I haven’t already experienced or felt myself. Really.”
With my lips pressed apprehensively together, I nervously looked up into Thad’s blue-green eyes. I could see he meant what he said, but it was just too difficult.
He ran his fingers through my red hair and then down my nose. I swallowed and said in a weak voice, ‟She called me a pervert.”
He nodded and said, ‟I heard that.”
‟She called you Daddy’s little bastard.”
Thad chuckled and shrugged, replying, ‟I’ve been called worse, believe me. But, I’m proud that Dad was my father.”
I nodded and looked away before I whispered, ‟I have a problem.”
‟Yeah?”
I took a deep breath and whispered, ‟It’s... about my wiener, my... penis.”
‟Yes?”
I turned and looked at him.
‟I...get hard all the time. I mean, all the time.”
‟Oh, hell. Is that all?” Thad asked with a grin. ‟If I had a dime for every time I’ve popped a boner, I’d be driving a Porsche and living in Palm Springs!”
In spite of myself, I chuckled. I’d never, ever spoken of this to anyone other than the doctor and Daddy. I’d never heard the term ‟pop a boner” before, but I knew what it meant, plus it sounded... exciting, nasty. It made my wiener throb really hard.
‟Thad, I know boys are supposed to... pop boners, but this is like way more than normal. It’s like... it’s like I’m a boner maniac.”
Thad laughed and I grinned in spite of my discomfort and then added, ‟The doctor says it’s a nervous condition. He said that it’s caused by anxiety and stress.”
Thad nodded and said, ‟Little Dude, I already knew this. It’s cool. Dad told me.”
My eyes grew wide with consternation and I exclaimed, ‟Daddy told you?”
Thad nodded matter-of-factly and explained, ‟He loved you and he was worried about you and he asked me for some advice.”
I looked down and shook my head. I couldn’t believe that Daddy had told him!
‟It’s okay, Little Dude. Really.”
I sighed and Thad leaned over with a grin and said, ‟So, I’m guessing you probably beat it a lot, too.”
I looked at him with some confusion and he chuckled. Forming a tube with his fingers, he jerked his hand back and forth and said, ‟You know, beat-off, jack-off, spank the monkey. Masturbate.”
‟Oh, um, yeah.”
Thad took a deep breath and asked, ‟Chrissy, can I ask you a question?”
I nodded nervously and Thad asked, ‟Did, um, did Grandad... ever... you know...”
I nodded and asked with surprise, ‟How did you know?”
‟He did it to me, too. I don’t suppose you had much choice, did you?”
I looked down in shame and said, ‟At first I was too scared to say no, but then it started feeling good and... I know it was sick and everything and I’m sorry I’m such a pervert and...”
‟Hey! Stop that! It’s not your fault! He should never have forced you! Of course it felt good, but he made you let him do it, so don’t you ever feel shame. That’s not the way it’s supposed to be. It’s supposed to be nice and loving and you’re supposed to want it.”
‟But, I did, later.”
Thad sighed and said, ‟The point I’m trying to make, Chrissy, is that... well, you’re not alone. You’re not the only one like this. I am, too. You and I are just alike.”
My jaw dropped and I looked at Thad with shock.
‟You mean...you get... boners and... beat it?”
Thad nodded and smiled.
‟Chrissy, my doctor diagnosed me a few years ago as something called ‟sexually compulsive.” It means have a very high sex drive. I have to have sex... a lot. I probably beat off three or four times a day. Maybe more. I go cruising for sex a lot. I get it on a lot.”
‟Me, too!” I said, quickly adding, ‟I mean, I... beat it like three or four times a day, too! Sometimes more.”
Thad nodded and explained, ‟You see, Chrissy, nobody knows for sure what causes people to be like us. It might be genetic, meaning something we inherit biologically, or it could be the way we’re raised, the psychological influences. It’s probably a mix of both. I think Grandad was probably this way, so we were probably born with a predisposition to be super-sexual and some psychological factors brought it out or made it more intense than it would have been. Something’s different about our brains. They just grew differently, so we need lots and lots of sex. Personally, I rather like sex, so I think it’s pretty cool. Of course, a lot of people don’t understand, so they take some outmoded religious view and just condemn us. Well, science is a little better than religion at explaining these things, so... I guess what I’m saying, Chrissy, is that... well, you’re just like me. You like sex. You were probably born with a predisposition to like sex more than most people and when Grandad molested you, he sort of confirmed it in your brain. For me, it was Grandad and my stepdad. He used to come into my room at night and do stuff with me until I was fifteen. Then he died. And, then I started cruising for sex, doing it with guys at school or at the park or lots of other places.”
I was stunned. My mind was absolutely blown away! I couldn’t believe what Thad was telling me. Thad was a sex maniac and so was I and it was okay! It was okay!
‟Of course, most people hate us. They think we’re perverts and sickos and should be put away. And, sometimes they’re right because sometimes there are people who force themselves on others, who force others to let them be sexual with them, like rapists and people like that. That’s wrong, Chrissy. You should never, ever, ever force someone to do it or to let you do it. Never! Do you understand?”
I nodded and asked, ‟But, what if I can’t help it? What if I want to do it with someone so bad I can’t stop myself and I force them to let me do it? What if I can’t help myself?”
‟Well, then in that case, you do need to get help from the psychiatrists or doctors. Do you ever feel that way?”
‟I don’t think so,” I replied. ‟I just feel really super sexy sometimes, like my wiener gets so hard that I think it’ll break off and I rub my wiener so much sometimes that it hurts.”
Thad hugged me and kissed my forehead before he chuckled and said, ‟You know, that doesn’t sound sexually compulsive. That sounds more like a normal, horny eleven year old boy.”
I smiled and my brother added, ‟So don’t ever think you’re all alone, because you’re not, Chrissy. There are lots of people like us out there. You just need to make sure that this doesn’t like take over your life. There are lots of wonderful and beautiful things about life besides sex. I mean, sex is hot and wonderful and beautiful, but so are music and art and literature and love. Love is important, just as important, even more important. Balance, Chrissy. Balance it all and you’ll be a very happy boy and man.”
I nodded. My wiener was so hard in my shorts, harder than it had ever been. All this talk had made me feel sexier than I had ever felt in my life. I needed to rub, to... beat it so bad I thought I was going to go crazy, but Thad wasn’t finished talking.
‟One day, you’ll meet a nice girl or a nice woman and you’ll like her and have really hot and nice and beautiful sex with her. Or lots of girls and women.”
‟What if I don’t like girls or women?” I asked with a shaky voice.
Thad grinned and replied, ‟Ah. So you like boys, is it?”
I shrugged and looked sheepish.
‟I don’t know. I see a lot of cute boys who make my wiener hard, but girls or women don’t really make it hard.”
‟So, you’re a homo.”
I looked down and softly asked, ‟Is that what that means?”
Thad frowned and asked, ‟Do people call you that?”
I nodded, once again unable to look Thad in the eye as I answered, ‟The kids at school... they call me all kinds of names like sissy and fairy and fruit and homo. Mostly they call me sissy ‘cause I cry so much and I’m so bad at games and... well, I mean I act so... I mean, I don’t act like a girl. I don’t want to be a girl. I’m glad I’m a boy, but... I don’t really act like other boys. I don’t know how to put it.”
Thad hugged me with his right arm and sat back on the couch, pulling me with him. I lay my head on my shoulder and felt so much nicer and more peaceful and relaxed. He said, ‟You’re a more passive, delicate, sweet boy. You’re probably what other gay guys call a ‘bottom.’”
‟A bottom?”
Thad grinned and said, ‟I’ll explain sometime. I don’t want to overwhelm you with too much information too soon. Just know that there’s nothing wrong with you. It isn’t always a bad thing to be a sissy. Besides, I kind of like sissies.”
I hated being called a sissy, yet, when Thad did it, it almost seemed like a compliment. I relaxed a little more and said, ‟There’s a boy on TV I think about when I rub, I mean, when I beat it.”
‟Yeah? Who?”
I nodded and said, ‟He’s the kid who plays Israel, you know, Daniel Boone’s son on Daniel Boone. He’s so cute. He’s got the prettiest blond hair and... I want to kiss him for hours!”
Thad nodded and said, ‟Yeah, he’s really cute. I can see why you’d like him. You know who I like right now?”
‟Who?” I asked with growing excitement.
Thad pointed to the poster of The Doors on the wall.
‟I think Jim Morrison is a sex god. I think he’s one of the hottest guys on earth. I’d love to lick him all over and...”
I started giggling uncontrollably.
‟What?” Thad asked with a grin.
‟I can’t believe we’re talking like this!” I explained. ‟I mean, I’ve never told anyone about this before. No one’s ever talked to me about sex and stuff before. This is... this is so cool.”
‟It is,” Thad replied with a grin. ‟It really is cool sitting here all boned up and talking about cute guys with my little gay sissy brother.”
I giggled some more and looked down at the front of our shorts. With a wild surge of sexiness, I realized that we were both hard! Thad was sitting next to me and his wiener, his penis, was hard!
‟Thad, you’re hard.”
‟Yeah,” he replied with a husky voice. ‟I’m really horny. I always bone up when I talk about sex and guys and what I like to do with them.”
‟I bone up every time I think about it!”
‟Oh, yeah. I’m almost always hard.”
We were both silent for a bit. I wanted to rub, to beat it. I wanted to so bad I could hardly stand it. And, I wanted to see Thad’s big man wiener. I wanted to see his hard penis. The rise in his shorts looked so long and thick. It had to be huge, enormous, gigantic!
It was getting dark in the room. There was light coming in through the windows from the lights along the street and the candle on the table in front of us flickered as, ironically, The Doors came on the stereo playing Light My Fire. I looked up at Thad and grinned as he looked down and said in a soft, breathy voice, ‟Even his voice is sexy. He makes me so hard.”
I swallowed as I realized my hands were trembling. I was so hard I just knew my wiener was going to break off inside my shorts!
‟Thad,” I breathed.
‟Yeah, Little Dude?”
‟I have to do it.”
‟Me, too. I need to beat off really bad.”
‟Yeah,” I said, feeling so nasty, so wicked, so sexy, so alive. ‟I need to beat off!”
We looked at each other as Thad started rubbing his hand across the front of his shorts and he grinned nastily at me and said, ‟You know what? I think we should get naked. You want to get naked, Little Dude? You want to get naked and beat off?”
I could barely control my voice as I replied, ‟Yeah.”
Thad grinned and said, ‟You sounded so sexy just then!”
I giggled and Thad suddenly stood up. With a huge grin, he walked around the big spool coffee table and stood in the center of the living room. I stood up and walked around to stand in front of him, our eyes hungrily looking up and down each other. The front of Thad’s shorts were tented outward so outrageously. I had never seen anything like it! I looked downward and felt so inadequate when I saw that mine was big, bigger than it had ever been, tenting out and pointing down and to the right, but it wasn’t anything like Thad’s!
My big brother kicked off his loafers and nudged them to the side with his bare foot. I looked at his feet and felt a rush; they were so big and sexy and his toes were so long and manly and cool. Then he grabbed his shirt and whipped it up and over his head and then carelessly tossed it aside to land on the floor behind him.
Thad was standing before me now in nothing but his Madras shorts. His chest looked so exciting. There was almost no hair on it, only a hint of blond hair near his titties, which were big and round and red and hard! I wanted to feel them! There was reddish blond hair under his slim, strong arms that looked so hot and a line of it running down from his navel and into his shorts. He cocked his head slightly and grinned at me.”
‟Well? Aren’t you going to get naked, too?”
I awoke from my trance and blushed. With a grin, I pulled my shirt off and tossed it aside, knelt down to untie my sneakers and pull them off, along with my socks, and then stood up again. I was so excited; I was about to get naked with my brother! I was about to get naked with Thad! I was going to see him naked!
He grabbed the top of his shorts and unfastened them. I did the same and we both unzipped together. Then, he slipped his thumbs inside the elastic band of his underwear and grinned at me, suggesting, ‟Why don’t we drop them at the same time. Okay?”
I nodded and he giggled like a little boy before he said, ‟One... two...”
He dropped his before he made it to three and laughed as his shorts and underwear fell to the floor and his wiener boinged up and pointed rigidly outward.
I couldn’t breathe; I couldn’t move. I thought to myself that his wiener must have been six or seven or eight inches long! I couldn’t believe it! It started out in a big patch of soft, red hair and extended outward to a wide, pink ring behind the cone, which didn’t flair out like mine, but was shaped actually like a cone. It was much darker than the pink ring and looked like it might explode. His wiener was bouncing slightly, too, maybe with his heartbeat. And, his balls were fat and big and hung snugly underneath. I couldn’t take my eyes off the sight.
Thad cleared his throat and I looked up.
‟I believe it’s your turn, or do you want me to take them off for you?”
I blushed and quickly shoved my shorts and briefs down, letting my stiffy bounce in the warn evening air at almost a forty-five degree angle. My wiener wasn’t even half as long as Thad’s and only about as thick as a magic marker. And, it certainly didn’t have any hair around it. I was almost embarrassed for Thad to see it, but when I looked at his face, he seemed to be as fascinated with my wiener as I was with his.
‟Oh, man, Chrissy. You dick is so beautiful,” he almost whispered. ‟That’s the prettiest boy dick I’ve ever seen in my whole life.”
I looked down at my... dick did he call it?... I looked down at my dick and wondered what was so pretty about it. It wasn’t anything like Thad’s, which was so big and long and powerful looking. I wanted to get down on my knees in front of him and run my hands all over his dick. It was spectacular.
Thad set his feet apart and thrust his hips forward, before he ran the fingers of both hands up and down his long, rigid dick. He twined them through his red dick hair and then around his balls. I watched hypnotized as he touched himself. Then, suddenly, his right hand grasped his dick and he started pumping on it as pushed his hips outward toward me.
‟Come on, Little Dude,” he said to me in a horse, raspy voice. ‟Jack it! Beat that boner. Make it feel good. Do it.”
My hand was shaking. In fact, my whole body was shaking as if I had just gotten freezing cold. I grasped my dick with my thumb and my first two fingers and began to frantically rub it.
‟No, no,” Thad said. ‟Grab it, man. Really pump on it. Like this.”
Shaking and feeling weak, I did as he said. I wrapped my hand around my dick and started pumping on it. It felt good, so good, so awfully good! It felt so good that suddenly, I fell to my knees and gave myself the Big Feeling! It came too soon and surprised me. I didn’t expect it that fast, but looking at Thad naked, beating his dick right in front of me, and being naked in front of Thad and beating my own dick in front of him, it was all too exciting. It hit me hard as I fell to my knees in front of him. I bucked and twisted a few times as I cried out, and then I collapsed on the floor in front of him.
Thad looked down at me and grinned as I gasped for breath.
‟Man, that was fast,” he said as he knelt in front of me, still pumping his dick. ‟Did it feel good, Chrissy?”
‟Oh, yeah, so good,” I breathed.
Thad was on his knees and sat back, spreading his knees wide as he jacked on his dick with his right hand.
‟Get up on your knees,” he told me.
Slowly, my eyes locked on his rapidly pumping fist, I got up on my knees, my still rigid stiffy pointing up at his face. With his left hand, he reached forward and wrapped it around my dick.
‟Uhhh!” I groaned as I felt his hand on my dick. He began to fondle me, rubbing his fingers across my balls, stroking up and down on my boner, touching my lower belly where I assumed my own hair would grow someday. It was the best feeling in the world.
‟Nnng! Nnng! Nnng!” I whined as he pushed my hips forward. ‟Oh, God, that feels so good! Feels so good. Its way better than when Grandad did it!”
‟Yeah?” Thad replied with a grin. ‟It’s because I want to make you feel good, Chrissy. I want it to feel so good you can’t stand it. I want you to scream because it feels so good.”
His words were making me feel so much more sexy. I felt like an animal.
I reached forward with my hands and touched Thad. He moaned softly, muttering, ‟Oh, yeah, Chrissy. Feel me. Feel my dick. Yeah, feel my balls,” as I ran my fingers through his red dick hair and cupped my hands over his big, fat balls. He kept pumping his dick as I felt him and he continued to fondle me. Soon, his fondling turned into stroking up and down on my stiffness and I was going crazy. He seemed to know just how to make my crazy and how to make it last without making the Big Feeling. Every time I’d get close, he slow down or change his style. Instead of just stroking up and down, sometimes he would twist his hand around, or twist and pump, sliding his thumb across the sensitive tip and making me squeal because the feeling was just too much.
‟Oh, God, uh, Thad, Thad. Oh, my dick! My dick feels so good! Uhhh! Uhhh! Nnngya! Nnngya! Uhhh! Uuuh! UUUH!”
Suddenly, just as I was about to go into the Big Feeling again, he released my dick and I screamed, ‟What are you doing? I was going to do it! Don’t stop! Don’’t stop! Do it, Thad! Do it!”
Thad released his own dick at that moment and I stared at it as it jumped and throbbed stiffly before me. Thad was panting and as he remained on his knees in front of me, he gasped for breath and panted, ‟Oh, man, this is so beautiful. You are so fucking beautiful, Chrissy. You’re the most beautiful boy in the world. I love the freckles across your face and your red hair and your smooth skin. God, you’re beautiful. I love you, Chrissy.”
‟I love you, Thad,” I said, still trembling with sexiness.
Thad sat down on the floor in front of me and spread his legs wide, his dick pointing straight up in the air.
‟Come here,” he breathed.
I scooted forward between his legs and then he wrapped around me. My stiffy was pointing upward between my legs just a couple of inches from his own vertical boner. He cupped my face with his left hand and wrapped his right around my dick again and as he slowly started fondling me again, he whispered, ‟I love you, Little Brother,” and then leaned forward and kissed me. That was the neatest thing. Thad was kissing me. I loved it. I kissed him back as I squirmed under his pumping hand on my dick. I felt his lips part and his tongue pushed forward against my own lips and I began to wonder if he was going to stick his tongue in my mouth. Ordinarily, the thought of someone else’s tongue in my mouth would have totally grossed me out, but at that moment, as Thad jacked my dick and held my face and kissed me as only someone who loved me could kiss me, I wanted it. I wanted it badly. I wanted his tongue.
And, then he did it. He pushed his tongue slowly between my lips and I let it in. He paused by my teeth, rubbed his tongue back and forth over them and then pushed forward. I tried to move my own tongue out of the way and then pushed it forward against his.
My tongue slid across his tongue. They slid back and forth against each other, twisting and pushing and sliding, two tongues like separate living things, twisting and loving each other.
I was whining and whimpering like a little girl as I twisted and squirmed under his slow, relentlessly pumping on my stiff boy dick. Thad was moaning softly, as well, and I could feel his moans as he breathed them into me and down my throat. This was way beyond anything I had ever even thought about, let alone done!
Suddenly, I grabbed Thad’s dick. I had to feel it! I had to stroke it. I ran my hands all over it, all over his balls, all through his dick hair, along the inside of his thighs, and back along his rigid, throbbing dick. He moaned loudly into my mouth and I became crazy. He slowed his jacking on my dick again and I cried out, ‟No!” into his mouth.
‟Do it! Do it!” I tried to say as his tongue rampaged through my mouth and across my own tongue. His left hand held my face to his tightly as he simply held my dick with his right hand. Then, slowly, he began to jack again, ever so slowly moving up and down, his fingers sliding over my little balls and tickling the sensitive area between my balls and my butt. I didn’t know why and the thought had never occurred to me before, but I wanted his fingers to push on down to my butt, but they didn’t.
He was moaning into my mouth as he kissed me so hard. I felt like I couldn’t control anything, like Thad was completely in charge and that made me almost scream into his mouth.
Suddenly, the Big Feeling hit me again. I cried and whimpered and twisted about as he held my mouth firmly to his and his right hand rubbed and stroked my spasming dick. I was grabbing and feeling his dick and balls any way I could, unable to really think, knowing only that I was on the verge of passing out because everything was just so good and mind-blowing and wonderful and beautiful and good!
I bucked and twisted and then the feeling seemed to go down, but not completely go away because Thad just kept right on stroking me. My dick was almost too sensitive and I screamed into his mouth. I tried to pull away and beg him to stop, but I couldn’t. His left hand held my mouth to his too tightly and his right hand was working my dick again. I was whimpering loudly and grabbing and stroking and rubbing Thad and Thad was groaning and moaning loudly down my throat as he kissed me and his hand was stroking me and my dick was so hard and it was feeling so good and it felt like the Big Feeling was just lasting and lasting and growing again even stronger than before and...
Thad grunted loudly and squeezed me so tight it hurt and I became aware of something wet and hot squirting all over my hands and arms and across my legs and tummy and chest as Thad squirmed and bucked and kissed and pushed his tongue all around in my mouth and squeezed my dick and then the Big Feeling, the Really Really Big Feeling hit and I was screaming into his mouth.
The next thing I remember was that I was lying on the floor, sticky stuff all over me, feeling so tired and peaceful and nice as Thad sat over me, panting and smiling down at me with such a look of love on his face. I couldn’t say anything and I figured that neither could Thad. He just looked at me with those blue eyes, his thick reddish blond curls falling over his forehead, his puffy lips forming the most beautiful smile.
He leaned down and kissed me gently on the lips before he slipped his hands underneath me and lifted me up as he stood. I was too tired to say anything, but it was the most glorious feeling, Thad carrying me across the room to his bed in the darkness. With only the light of the city outside the windows, he lay me down on the bed and walked away, returning after a moment with a warm, wet rag with which he wiped the sticky goo off me. Tossing the rag to the floor, he pulled the covers back under me and lay down beside me. Barely awake, I felt Thad wrap his arms around my naked body and pull me to him. He kissed me gently on the lips and, feeling his arms holding me and the warmth of his body below me, I lay my head on my big brother’s chest and fell asleep.
I was in love with my big brother.
I hope you enjoyed the first chapter of my story. Please let me know at montag154@ gmail.com. Thank you!