Date: Sat, 23 Sep 2000 20:45:16 -0700 (PDT)
From: Brew Maxwell <brew_drinker23@yahoo.com>
Subject: Twin Spin, Part 2, Chapter 1

Disclaimer:

The following is a work of fiction, and any resemblance to real people or
events is purely coincidental.  The story contains graphic descriptions of
sex between men, and anyone who is forbidden by law to read such material
must exit the story now.  The characters have unprotected sex, as
characters safely can in fiction.  Reality, obviously, is another matter
entirely.

This story is being posted to the Nifty Archive for the enjoyment of its
readers.  It may not be posted or distributed by any other medium without
the written permission of the author.

Other works by the author in the Nifty Archive include "Unusual Christmas"
and the series Nick's Adventures, both in bisexual/high school; "First
Mate" and "Twin Spin" in gay/incest; The Dancer and Call-Boy Journal in
gay/encounters; "My First Year with Kevin" in gay/high school; and "From
Slave to Houseboy" in gay/authoritarian.

This story is a continuation of "Twin Spin," and you might find that some
of the references make more sense if you've read the first part.

E-mail comments are always welcome.

Twin Spin, Part 2

Chapter 1

	The rest of the ride back home was pretty silent after the outburst
between Kevin and Brian.  I knew that Kevin was in bad shape, emotionally,
and so did Brian.  It was something he had to go through alone, though.  If
either of us tried to help him through it, it would have only prolonged the
agony.
	At the next rest stop, Brian took over the driving, and I sat in
front with him.  Kevin was in the back seat.  When I looked back at him, as
I did every few minutes, sometimes he would be staring out of the window,
seeing nothing, I was sure.  Other times he would have his head hung down
in the kind of position of sadness that made my heart break for him.  I
loved Brian to death, but, of the two, Kevin was the one I was more drawn
to, and I absolutely hated to see him suffering.  And that's truly what it
was--suffering.
	We got home to the place in Asheville around eight o'clock.  We
unloaded the car, and the boys went up to their rooms, presumably to
unpack.  I was down the hall, and I didn't hear any talk between them.
Kevin finished first, and I heard him leave his room and go downstairs.  I
hadn't really finished sorting out my dirty clothes from my clean clothes,
if there were any clean ones, but I went down right after him.  He was
pouring himself a drink of scotch when I got down to the den.
	"Oh, hey, J.  You want a drink?"
	"Yes, please," I said.
	"Coming right up," he said.  He sounded cheerful and regular, but I
suspected he and I needed to talk.
	"Come outside with me," I said.
	"Okay."
	Once we were on the patio and had taken seats, I started the
conversation.
	"That was some pretty heavy shit you and Brian got into on the way
home.  You want to talk about it?"
	"Yeah, I do.  I really do."
	He took a sip of his drink and set it aside.
	"Do you know when the last time was that Brian or I hit each other
in anger," he asked.
	"No.  Of course I don't."
	"I don't either, J.  It's been more than ten years, though, that
much I know."
	"That really bothered you, didn't it?"
	"Oh, man, he's my brother.  I can't hit him.  And I thought he
couldn't hit me.  Sure, we punch each other in fun, but he did it in anger.
He wanted to beat me up."
	Kevin was close to tears again.  I didn't know what to do or what
to say.
	"I know he did it to make a point, but that wasn't called for, I
don't think.  He didn't hurt me.  Shit, he punched me like a girl, not like
he can really punch.  But he punched me in anger.  I've lost him, J."
Kevin started to cry.
	"No, you haven't, Kevin.  You gained him as a brother, and not as a
twin."
	"Oh, so all of a sudden we aren't twins?"
	"No, that's not what I meant, and I think you know that, Kevin."
	"What do I know, J?  Tell me, please."
	"You know he loves you."
	"Shit, I've never doubted that.  And he knows I love him.  That's
what makes it so hard.  Why did he have to hit me?"
	I had to really think on that one.
	"Do you think he wanted to emphasize the point that you and he
aren't the same person?  He hit you because you were somebody other than
him.  He wouldn't inflict pain on himself, but he would on somebody else.
He'd hit somebody else, not himself."
	Kevin was very quiet for a long time.  I could see on his face that
he was processing what I had said.
	"Kevin, I think you've misjudged this thing a little bit.  You've
assumed you're the only one suffering from the realization that you and
Brian aren't the same person.  I think Brian is going through some of the
same stuff, man."
	"You think so?"
	"Well, I kind of know he is.  Just as I would never tell him
anything you told me in confidence, I can't tell you what he's told me in
confidence, either.  But, yeah, I think Brian wishes you were gay and that
the two of your could go through life as brothers and lovers.  But he knows
you can't.  He's not being a shit.  He's trying to help you see the truth."
	"Oh, I know that.  And I know he loves me in every way.  Hell, we
each love each other more than we do ourselves, and each of us would gladly
die for the other one.  That will never change."
	"The way I see it, Brian hit you because he wanted you to know he
accepts that fact.  He loves you, but you guys are different people.
Individuals, with a right to individual lives."
	"Yeah, I know.  And I accept that.  At least on the intellectual
level.  Emotionally is another story, but I'm getting better with that,
too."
	"Could you go up there right now and slap him around to claim that
you are the same person?  I mean, he slapped you around to make the point
that you guys aren't the same person."
	Kevin hung his head.  He was silent for a long time.
	"No," he finally said, "I couldn't."
	"Don't you see the progress you're making, man?  You're not willing
to admit you guys are the same person.  Two weeks ago you would never have
said that."
	"Two week ago I was crying my fucking eyes out in the steam bath at
the Finch building."
	"Exactly.  You have grown enormously, Kevin, in those weeks.
You've become a man, man."
	"I know you're right, J, and you know I want to cry my eyes out
right now for what I've lost."
	"Kevin.  Dude.  You haven't lost anything.  You have a gay brother,
and you might as well face it.  He loves you absolutely, totally, and
completely.  You know that."
	"Yeah, I do.  But will he still want me?  Sexually, I mean.  Cause
I still want him."
	"I can't answer that.  You've told me you've wanted him less and
less, sexually, for the last year.  Will you still want him?"
	Kevin burst into tears.  "That's the point, J.  I don't know if I
will, and that will kill me."
	"No, it won't, Kevin.  It won't kill you.  It will be natural.  It
will be what God intended for both of you boys."
	"I've never heard you speak of God before, J."
	"Well, maybe not, but I believe in God, as I know you and Brian do,
and God doesn't have a sexual relationship between you on a permanent basis
in mind.  That's really clear to me."
	"I guess it's clear to me, too," he said.
	"I'm tired, and I'm going to bed.  Good night."
	"Night, man.  And J, thank you so much for putting up with me.  I
love you."
	"I love you, too, Kevin, but good night."  With that I went to bed,
physically and emotionally exhausted.

	The next morning when I got up, the boys were on the patio, naked,
reading the paper.  I sensed no hostility between them, but they were both
more subdued than they usually were.  I made myself a cup of coffee and
took it outside where they were.
	"Morning, guys," I said, pretending to be more cheerful than I
really was.
	"Morning, J," they said in unison.
	"So what's up for today," I asked.
	Neither one responded.
	"Do you guys want to be alone," I asked.
	"Of course not, J," Kevin said.  "In fact, I want you to stay.  I
want to say something to both of you."
	Oh, shit, I thought.  Here it comes.  Another crying jag.
	"What is it you want to say," Brian asked.
	"I think you know, Brian," Kevin replied.
	"Yeah, I think I do, too, but J doesn't, so say it anyway."
	"Well, first off, I want to say thank you for taking us on that
trip, J.  You know, there were a few times when I didn't feel very happy,
but I still had a great time."
	"Yeah, J, me, too," Brian said.
	"Well, you guys are more than welcome.  I had a good time, too,
although I think all three of us had some unhappy times, Kevin."
	"I know, and that's what I really want to talk to you guys about.
I'm sorry I've been acting like such an asshole.  You guys have been great
to put up with my shit, and I really, really love both of you.  I was up
almost all night out here thinking about everything, and, Brian, thank you
for forcing me to face the truth.  I know you did it because you love me,
but it hurt so bad that I couldn't see that very clearly.  When you hit me
yesterday in the car, I thought my world had ended.  But I now know it
hasn't."
	"I have been crying inside ever since I did that, Huck.  Did I hurt
you, Kevin?"
	"Oh, shit no.  Not physically.  You hit me like you were some kind
of eight-year-old girl."
	"Fuck you," Brian said.
	"I want to talk about that later with you, but I want that to be
private, okay?"
	"You asshole," Brian said, grinning broadly.
	"I've thought about this a lot, Brian, thanks, mainly, to what J
has helped me realize, and I know we can't be brothers and lovers for the
rest of our lives.  Even though I love you with every cell in my body and
every thought in my head, I now know I no longer even want to be your
brother...er, LOVER.  I meant to say 'lover,' not 'brother.'
	"You shit-ass, I knew you were going to pull that bullshit when you
opened your ugly mouth."
	They both laughed, and I could tell the old "twin spin" hadn't been
affected one bit by all that had happened.
	"Seriously, I'll always consider you my lover, even if we never
touch one another sexually again.  I hope that won't be the case, but, if
it is, you'll still be my brother and my lover.  But it will be the real
'me,' not the 'Brian' me."
	Then it was Brian's turn to tear up.  Oh, shit, I thought,
adolescence.  Thank God they were almost through with it.
	"That was so beautiful, Huck.  And I feel the same way," Brian
said.  He got control of himself before he became a complete waterspout,
though, and Kevin continued.
	"I know you do, Huck.  And I know you always will.  You've always
been the more aggressive of us, and the hitting in the car yesterday was
just your way of saying you love me and that I'm not you.  I know that
now."
	"Kevin, please don't remind me of that.  You know I'm not
aggressive."
	"Hell, J, he kicked the shit out of me on purpose for nine months
when we were inside Mom."
	"You asshole," Brian said, laughing between his tears.
	"So how come I was bruised when we were born, and you weren't?
Huh?  I remember everything, Brian."
	"Shut the fuck up.  You know that isn't true."
	"Why, do you remember it differently?"
	"Look, boys, I think Kevin has done a pretty courageous thing this
morning, but no more courageous than what you did, Brian, in confronting
him.  I can see there aren't any hard feelings between you, and I'm really
glad for that.  Kiss and make up."
	"I ain't kissing no boy," Kevin said.
	"Oh, yes, you are, motherfucker."
	Brian leaped onto Kevin in the lounge chair he was in, put his
knees on either side of him, and kissed him hard.  In a couple of minutes,
Brian started humping into Kevin, and I decided I was a third wheel in what
was going on there.  I went inside, but I watched from the kitchen window
as they made very tender love to one another.
	I was very proud of Kevin that morning, and I was proud of Brian,
too, but for different reasons.  I thought the storm had passed, and I was
thankful.

	Chuck got there around ten.  The boys both came inside when they
saw him drive up, and they kissed and hugged him like a long-lost parent.
	"Chuck, guess what?  I'm not gay anymore."
	"Kevin, baby, you never were," Chuck said, matter-of-factly.
	"Yes, I was.  You know what Brian and I have done."
	"Of course, I know.  Who do you think has changed those cummy
sheets for years.  But you've never been gay, Kevin.  And you never will
be.  Oh, I know you've wanted to be.  Probably still do, but, baby, this is
like your birthday.  And thank God you have finally realized who and what
you are."
	"Well, that's a pretty damn sobering idea," Kevin said.
	"Kevin, boy, if you had any idea how many hours your daddy and I
have talked about you and your sexuality, you would just be floored.  He
thought y'all were both gay for a long time, but I never thought it.  I'm
gay; Tom isn't.  Brian's gay; you aren't.  Is any of this starting to
penetrate that beautiful skull of yours."
	"Well, why didn't you tell me?"
	"Realizing they're gay takes some men a long time.  I guess finding
out they aren't gay takes some men a long time, too," Chuck said.  "But you
know who spotted you first?"
	"Who?"
	"Well, fucking guess, Kevin.  His name starts with a C and ends
with an N."
	Kevin thought for a second.  Then a big grin came over his face.
"Calvin?  He knew?"
	"Yes, son, Calvin knew for years.  He don't have no Princeton tiger
on his ass for nothing, you know?"
	"You son of a bitch," Kevin said.  "Both of you."
	"Maybe, but not the same bitch, like you two."
	"Uhhhhhhh, did you call my mama a bitch," Kevin asked.
	"Well, don't bitches give birth to mongrel dogs?"
	"Well, your mama did, but I'd never disrespect your mama by calling
her a bitch."
	"She wasn't.  She was a fine lady."
	"So how come you turned out so bad, if she was so fine?"
	"How long has it been since I've taken a spatula to your sorry
ass," Chuck asked.
	"Oh, way too long.  Do it now, please, Chuck.  You know I love it,
and you know you love it.  Please give me the spatula."
	"Kevin, get your sorry ass out of my kitchen, right now, STRAIGHT
BOY."
	Kevin got the most forlorn look on his face, just like he has lost
his best friend.  He was going to cry any second, and I thought Chuck was,
too, when he saw his face.
	"Oh, baby, I didn't mean that.  You know that.  You know your Chuck
loves you and is happy for you."  Chuck was all over Kevin, hugging him,
petting him, taking him to his heart.
	"Gotcha last, Chunk."
	Kevin ran upstairs so fast he probably broke world records.
	"That asshole.  No, I'm the asshole.  I didn't even recognize the
Dozens, and I'm the one that taught it to you two.  Well, fuck me."
	"When," Brian asked eagerly.
	"You get your sorry ass out of my kitchen, too.  You ain't no
better than him.  And don't you dare say 'gotcha last,' cause you ain't got
me.  Not like that sorry-ass brother of yours did.  I'm cooking his
favorite meal tonight to show him I acknowledge his greatness."
	"It's my favorite meal, too," Brian said.
	"Yeah, but it's for him, not for you.  I'll fix you a pan of gruel
for your supper.  You get, too, and let the grown-ups be in peace."
	"We love you, Chuck," Brian said.
	"I know you do, and I love you, but you can't stay in my kitchen,
and you can't have my Bud Lite, either.  Now get."

	When the boys were gone, Chuck turned to me and said, "Sit your ass
down.  We've got some talking to do.  What has happened to my boys?"
	"Oh, Chuck.  You don't even want to know."
	"Yes, sir.  I want to know everything.  And I mean everything.  It
was that trip, wasn't it?"
	"Not really.  This has been coming for a long time."
	"Over a year," Chuck said.  "Remember, I change the sheets."
	I laughed when he said that.
	"You laugh if you want to, but I've known a crisis has been
brewing.  I love both of those boys with all my heart and soul, but, if I
had to choose, I'd choose Kevin.  He's my baby."
	"Well, they don't know that," I said.
	"And, please God, they never will.  But it's the truth, John.
There's just enough of a difference between them for me to favor Kevin over
Brian.  Consequently, I've probably been just a little bit harder on Kevin
over the years so Brian wouldn't suspect.  That spatula bit?  I have taken
a spatula to his ass more than once.  Brian's, too, but much more often to
Kevin's.  He's the instigator."
	"Yeah, he's told me that, too.  Not in so many words, but I've
picked that up."
	"That Brian is so much more intuitive than Kevin is.  Kevin's
gotten better over the years, but Brian has always had that gift."
	"I call it 'twin spin.'  They know what the other one is thinking
and doing, it seems."
	"Oh, John, you don't know the half of that.  I like that term--twin
spin.  Damn, they have it in spades."
	I told Chuck about the incident in New Jersey where Kevin knew
Brian was in trouble.
	"And Kevin beat the shit out of the guy, too, didn't he?"
	"Yes, sir.  He did."
	"And did he take care of Brian after it happened?"
	"Well," I said, "he actually wanted to rape the guy who did it.
Brian stopped him."
	"That figures.  Kevin is much more aggressive than Brian is.  Kevin
will tell you the opposite, of course, but he is."
	"We were talking about that this morning before you got here, and
Kevin said Brian was the more aggressive.  Brian hit Kevin several times in
anger in the car yesterday.  Kevin never hit him back.  He just took it and
started crying."
	"My Kevin started crying from blows from Brian?  Bullshit."
	"No, they weren't hard.  Kevin said this morning Brian hit him like
an eight-year-old girl would have.  He was hurt because Brian hit him in
anger."
	Chuck thought a while.  Then he said, "I'm not surprised.  Brian
would never hurt Kevin.  Not now.  That's not the way it always was, and
I've put ice on more than one bloody nose on both sides.  But that's been
ten years or more.  I've never known two brothers who were as close as
those two are, and Brian would never hit Kevin to hurt him.  Unless it was
to make a point."
	"That's exactly how I figured it.  Brian was trying to make the
point, probably subconsciously, that he and Kevin aren't the same person.
They're two different people."
	"Oh, sweet Jesus.  Is that what Kevin has finally realized?
	"Yeah, but it was hard going for him.  He wants to be gay so he can
be like Brian."
	"Shit, I knew they would come to that eventually, but I thought I
would be there to counsel them.  You got that squared away?"
	"Well, I think so.  You don't know how many times on that trip I
said to myself, 'God, if only Chuck were here.'"
	"Well, the outcome looks like you handled it very, very well.  My
hat's off to you, man.  Tom knows how to pick his people well, doesn't he?
	"Well, I guess."
	"I know he does, John.  I know he does."  Pause.  "If you'll get
out of my way right now, I might be able to get some lunch on this table in
a little while.  It's 11:30, and I know they'll be needin' a feedin'.
	I left and went up to my room.

	Chuck rang what amounted to a dinner bell, and all three of us
heeded it.  He had made a delicious lunch, and we all, including Chuck, ate
heartily.  It was amazing to me how much those boys loved Chuck.  He really
was their mother, and, increasingly, their father.  After lunch Kevin
wanted to go into town to work out.  He asked Brian to go along, but Brian
declined.
	"Now, you don't see that very often," Chuck said, when they were
both gone.  He and I were still at the table having coffee.
	"I know.  I'm kind of amazed," I replied.
	"You know what's next, don't you?"
	"What," I asked.
	"Separate cars.  Their having just one car between them is going to
become more and more of a problem as they start developing different
interests.  They'll want the same make and model, of course, and, if they
aren't supervised, they'll want the same color, too, even if they buy them
at the same time in different cities.  I'll mention that when I talk to Tom
later on."
	"How often do you guys get to talk," I asked.
	"Almost every day.  He doesn't talk to them that often, but he and
I usually manage to get in ten or fifteen minutes on the phone daily.  Next
to Calvin, Tom is my best friend, and I know I'm his because he's said so
since we were five years old.  You probably think he doesn't care much
about them since he's not here very much, but those two are his left and
right eyes and nuts."  Chuck finished his coffee.  "Well, I've got work to
do," he said.
	I knew that was my signal to get out of the kitchen, so I did.  I
went up to my room and lay down.  In a few minutes, Brian came in.
	"Can I talk to you," he asked.
	"Of course you can.  Any time, dude.  Do you want to talk about
Kevin?"
	Brian sat on my bed.  "Yeah.  Do you feel like it?"
	"Sure.  What's up?"
	"That was a damn hard thing he did this morning, don't you think?"
	"Yes, I do.  Both of you are turning into men of fine character."
Where'd that line come from, I wondered.  Jeez, I'm getting old, I thought.
	"You like him more than you do me, don't you?"
	That question floored me.  Had I done anything to make that
obvious?  I mean, the difference in my feeling for them was so tiny I
didn't think anybody could notice it.
	"That's an unfair question, don't you think, Brian?"
	"Yeah.  I guess it is.  If you do, though, I understand.  Most
people like him more than they do me.  Except Chuck.  He likes us the
same."
	"Chuck *loves* you the same; he doesn't just *like* you."
	"And I think you love us the same, too.  Loving and liking aren't
necessarily the same thing, not the way I mean it."
	"Brian, this is confusing the hell out of me.  What is it you're
trying to say, man?"
	"That we're different people.  The differences are more subtle than
in most brothers, but there are differences."  Then, out of the blue,
"Would you please hold me, J."
	"Sure, little dude," I said, to a man who was slightly taller and
much more muscular than I am.  "Do you want to take your clothes off."
	"Yes.  I need skin right now, J."
	We both got nude and lay down.  I took Brian into my arms, and his
warmth felt really good.
	After a few minutes of holding him, it finally dawned on me what
was going on.
	"This has really been hard on you, hasn't it?  All the attention
has gone to Kevin, but you're hurting as much as he is, aren't you?"
	"Probably not as much as he was hurting, but, yeah, I hurt pretty
bad, still."
	"You're not having second thoughts about what you did, I hope,
because it was the right thing to do.  Chuck said..."
	"What did Chuck say?"  Brian got that out before I could finish my
sentence.
	"Chuck basically said, 'Oh, thank God.  It's about time.'"
	"Were those his exact words, J?"
	"No, not really, but that's certainly what he meant.  I don't
remember his exact words."
	Brian was lying on his side, and I was spooned against him, holding
him.  My cock was in the crevice of his ass.  After a few minutes, I had my
normal male reaction to being that close to a gorgeous person.
	"Are you getting hard," Brian asked.
	"Guilty."
	"It feels really good.  I'm really horny.  Kevin and I made love
this morning for the first time in a long time, but I'm still horny."
	"That's authorized," I said.
	"What?"
	"Never mind.  I just meant it's okay for you to be horny."  I
started kissing him gently on the neck and shoulder.  "Is what I'm doing
okay with you," I asked him.
	"It's making me hard, if that's what you mean."
	"That's what I mean."
	From there I escalated what I was doing, and pretty soon he turned
to kiss me.  We both put plenty of tongue into it, and I could feel his
precum wetting my cock as they rubbed together.
	"I want you to fuck me," Brian said.  He quickly turned back onto
his side, facing away from me.  "Put it in me like this."  He bent his
right leg at the knee with his foot on the bed.  That gave me full access
to his ass.
	"Do we need some lube," I asked.
	"Oh, please!  I take Kevin's cock without lube.  I'll be able to
take yours just find."
	"Gee, thanks."
	He chuckled.  "You know what I mean, J.  Just stick it in me,
okay?"
	"Okay."  It was cute the way he said that.
	I entered him easily, and we had a wonderful, long, slow fuck.  He
contracted his ass muscles the way Kevin had done.  Like Kevin, he brought
us both to the brink of orgasm several times before he came, which caused
me to come.  I shot my load into him, but he didn't shoot.  I wondered if
he and Kevin had shot that morning.

	We went to sleep in each other's arms.  The next thing we knew,
Kevin was standing over us, grinning.
	"Hi, guys," he said cheerfully.  "Have any fun while old Kevin was
gone?"
	"Hey, Huck," Brian said.  "Yeah, we did, actually.  What about
you?"
	"Not that kind.  Maybe that will come later tonight."
	Nobody knew what to say, and the silence was a little awkward.
	Then, "I have a date tonight," Kevin said.
	"A date?  Already," Brian asked.
	"Damn straight," Kevin responded.
	"Don't rub it in," Brian said.
	"What I hope to do is stick it in.  Or gently thrust it in.  Or
maybe even gently ease it in."
	"So, did Vick ask you out," I asked.
	"Ohhhhhhhh, low blow, dude," Kevin replied.
	"What the hell are y'all talking about," Brian asked.
	"This fucker's been hanging out with us way too much, Brian.  He's
starting to catch on the Dozens."
	Kevin explained that Vick was the dumb-ass trainer at the Finch
building who didn't get the connection between their last name and the name
of the company or the building.  We had a good laugh.
	"Who you going out with, stud," I asked.
	"A girl I met."
	"You actually met her, and she's still going out with you," Brian
asked.
	"I don't plan on coming out to her.  I'm not into that fag bullshit
any more.  In fact, I hate queers."
	"So why do you desperately want to be one," Brian asked.
	"You know, I've asked myself that question a million times, and I
just can't find an answer to it."
	We all laughed at both what he said and the seriousness with which
he said it.
	"You want to get in here with us," I asked Kevin.
	"Of course, I do, but I'm running a little late.  I need to get
cleaned up and dressed for my date."
	"You're excited about this date, aren't you," Brian asked.
	"What do you think?"
	"Kevin, I know you are.  I can almost feel it myself.  Have a good
time, okay, Huck?"
	"Thanks, Huck.  I think I will."

	Kevin left my room to get dressed.
	"God, this all feels so natural and normal, doesn't it," Brian
asked.
	"What do you mean?"
	"He's there, J; he's really there.  He's where he needs to be."