Date: Sun, 10 Nov 2013 16:38:47 -0800 (PST) From: T W Subject: Greg and Tim Greg and Tim Greg and I met at work. It was the late 90's and we were both in our 30's. There was an instant connection when we first shook hands. But that wouldn't have mattered. I looked at one of the most engaging faces I had ever seen. His big smile lit up the area around you. You couldn't help but smile in his presence. Greg is eloquent and never meets a stranger. That is something I appreciate because I am much more reserved. We chatted about nothing just making small talk about work. Let me tell you about Greg. He is about 5'9", 190lbs of solid mass, slick bald head, dark cocoa skin and dark brown eyes you could just dive into. Greg is handsome, sexy, hot, and dreamy. He knows it but he doesn't let it show or go to his head. We became fast friends enjoying our lunch time together whether eating at the office or going somewhere off campus. I always thought of Greg as handsome but the more time I spent with him the more I saw beyond his physical beauty. Yeah, I know. I admit it. I'm shallow but I didn't start a friendship with him because of his looks. I became friends with Greg because I truly admired him. At the time I was not what I would consider hot but I wasn't fugly either. I was 5'10", mostly bald, 230lbs, blue eyes and dimples. When I heard the compliments about me, it was just like what people say about pretty women that are fat. Instead some adjectives were changed because I am a man, "you have such a handsome face", "you have the most gorgeous blue eyes", "I would kill for your dimples". A compliment is a compliment even if it is a back-handed one. Greg is one of the few people you will meet in your life that is comfortable with themselves. He doesn't care what people think about him and REALLY doesn't care what people say about him because of the company he keeps. Greg knew I was gay from the start but that didn't matter to him. My first thought was that he needed something and that was why he was being nice. That's usually the way it goes. You can picture it I'm sure...the hot guy talks up the awkward fat computer guy to get what he needs and then disappears once he gets it. I don't mean anything sexual. I'm talking work related. In the past it was, "hey Tim. I sure could use your help. You are the smartest one around here and you know all the ins and outs. Nobody can pull things from a computer like you can. Can you help me with this report"..."I sure wish I knew someone that could get this information for me"... "If you show this one more time I will be able to do it myself next time...Oh wait! I forgot I have this meeting I need to get to. Can you just do this one favor for me? I'll owe you." I have so many chits you wouldn't even believe it. Of course when I needed something, they could never help me. They conveniently forgot. So here comes Greg, handsome, confident, polite and so genuine. He must have a big favor to ask. And boy did he ever. "Tim, will you have lunch with me tomorrow? I know it's short notice and you probably already have plans but I will consider it a personal favor if you will." What? He wants to have lunch with me? I'm confused. What does he mean about it being a personal favor? "Greg? Lunch? What...why...Do you want something?" I stammered. I sounded like a blithering idiot. But Greg was ever so smooth. He didn't take offense to my faux pas. He just smiled at me. "Yes, I want something", he grinned at me. "I want to have lunch with you." And then he waited for my answer looking right at me with a cute grin. I didn't know what to say. A hot guy just asked me to lunch. Oh shit what do I do... Greg still just politely waited for my answer. Grinning at me the whole time. He looked at me like he could read the thoughts going through my mind. Then I thought, WTF. It's just lunch. He probably doesn't want anyone else to know he is asking me to help him with some project. "Ok, sure. Let's have lunch" I answered actually sounding more normal than I ever would have expected. Hot guys make me sound and act like a dork. "Where?" I asked "Well what do you like?" he asked and there was that grin. Was that just a smile or was that a double entendre question and grin. "For lunch?" I gulped as I asked for clarification. "Of course for lunch. What else did you think I was talking about?" he grinned even more and his eyes just danced. Disregarding his question I said, "Why don't we just go to the food court. Then we have options." "Then the food court it is." He suggested a time and it was all set. I was about to turn to go back into my office when he said my name again. "Tim?" he touched me on the shoulder and my heart stopped. "I am looking forward to tomorrow" he stated with sincerity. Then he turned and left. It took a minute for my legs to move again and get me back behind my desk. I couldn't concentrate on my work the rest of the day. I kept wondering what this lunch thing was. Why did he ask me? We don't even work in the same building. Before today I never saw him before. I knew him by name but that was it. But I know everyone by name. One of my job responsibilities is security of the computer system so I remember when the request crossed my desk to create an account for him. He has been here a couple of months now so more than enough time for word to filter back to him about how he can talk me into helping him. I'm sure that's what this is. The next day starts off with major problems. Huge system issues that need my immediate attention. I don't know if I will have it all fixed before lunch. This is a priority. I guess Greg will have to wait to ask me to help him with his project. I clear my mind of everything and get into my zone. When I do this I'm like a machine. I see only the screen in front of me and everything else fades away. The problems today are no match for me. I'm resolving one after the other and blazing through the morning. Just before the last one is finally fixed, I hear someone clear their throat. I look up and there sits Greg on the other side of my desk. I blink a couple of times and ask, "How long have you been sitting there?" "About 10 minutes", he answers. "I wanted to walk with you rather than meet at the food court. I came over early because I didn't want to miss you. "I spoke to you when I got here but you didn't hear me. So I knocked and called your name again" he chuckled. "Still nothing so I decided to wait you out. Do you always get that engrossed in your work?" I shrugged and said, "I don't know. I usually don't have visitors." I explained how my morning started and all the issues. "Well can you go to lunch now?" Greg asked still sitting. "Sure. Let's go." I got up and walked passed him on my way out the door. He patted me on the back saying, "You probably need the break after being that focused." I didn't say anything because that's just a part of the job. As we walked Greg started telling me about himself. As we ate I asked him about growing up in a small town because I have always lived in a big city. "It was very different than here in Atlanta. It was a much slower pace to everyday life. You knew all your neighbors. Everybody went to the same school and just about everybody went to church. Not the same church mind you but most did attend some type of service." He went on to paint a picture that sounded like a cross between a Norman Rockwell painting and Mayberry. I half expected him to tell me about Andy, Barney and the gang. When he finished his story, he said, "Ok, that's enough about me. I want to know about you." So I told him about my childhood. "I was born in Florida but I grew up in Atlanta. I've lived here so long I feel like a native" I grinned. "I grew up middle class. Dad worked and Mom stayed home with us until we could drive. Then she went to work part time to keep herself busy. I never really wanted for anything. My parents were awesome. All my friends came to my house to hang out. We were all close as it sounds like you were with your friends." And so we talked throughout the rest of lunch. I found that I was having a good time and didn't want it to end. As we walked back Greg looked to me, "Tim, I want to thank you for having lunch with me today. I am enjoying getting to know you." I smiled at Greg and said, "Greg, you don't have to thank me. I had a great time." "Good! Then have lunch with me tomorrow." I thought he was joking but he wasn't. He was serious. "Ok." He got the biggest smile on his face with that short response. That describes most days for Greg and me. We would have lunch and talk and get to know each other better. The more I learned the more I liked Greg. I knew I was in trouble. I was falling for him so hard. I was in deep. Funny thing is, he seemed like he was too. I guess he is just doing the old fashioned courtship thing. Greg and I had been seeing each other almost every day for lunch when I got knocked for a loop. He picked a quiet place today. He seemed a little on edge but I just figured he would talk about that when he was ready. Greg looked at me with an almost pained expression, "Tim, I need to tell you something but I don't want you to get the wrong idea." I'm thinking oh shit. He's like all the others. Here was this wonderful man that I was getting to know through our lunch conversations and it was all a game. Part of a plan to get me to help him. I was getting pissed now and it showed. He held up a hand and said, "Now just let me finish. I will answer all you questions but please here me out." Yep. Just like all the others. I'm sitting here thinking "ok asshole. Let's hear it. This ought to be good." "The day I walked over and introduced myself. I told you I just saw your name on your office and wanted to say hello" he started. "Yes, I remember" I said with a slight chill to my voice. "Please hear everything before you make any assumptions." Yeah, like I need to hear anything. Been there. Done that. Heard this before. What the fuck ever. Just get on with this so I can leave... "That wasn't the first time I saw you. I had to come over one day to speak with one of the technicians and I noticed you across the floor." What the hell is he talking about? "You were talking with someone and I watch your conversation with him. I had to know who you were so I asked the technician. He told me who both of you were. So I made an excuse to stay there so I could continue to look at you." "Greg", I looked at him with apprehension, "this is starting to make me uncomfortable." "No, please just wait. When I watched you with Chuck, I couldn't believe that you were so flirtatious with him. At first I was surprised because this was at work and also because Chuck isn't white. I just didn't expect to see that." NOW I was really pissed. Did he just say he thought I was racist? "I'm through here. I'm leaving." "Tim. Wait!" I turned and looked at him. The other people around us looked on wondering what the commotion was. "Why? Do you have more insults? I think I have heard enough." I turn and walk away. I didn't care what the other people thought. I didn't care that there was a "scene" and I was a part of it. I wasn't raised that way but nobody is going to insult me. And I damn sure won't sit there and listen to it. I'm fuming as I walk back to work. I need to vent to someone. I reach for my phone to make a call and it isn't there. I search my pockets looking for it muttering "where the fuck is my phone" looking to see if I dropped it. As I turn around there is Greg. Holding my phone and smiling. "Looking for this?" "Please give me my phone" I say holding out my hand and trying to remain calm but not feeling it. He shakes his head and puts my phone in his pocket. I just stand there wide eyed and my mouth hanging open. I was speechless. "All I ask is that you let me finish what I was trying to say back at the restaurant. I admit I was doing a poor job expressing my thoughts. Everything came out wrong and then I tried to fix it and only made it worse. But the thing is, what I did say isn't the part that I was concerned about telling you. I have made a mess of things and hope you will allow me the chance to explain myself." "If I give you that chance, will you give me back my phone?" "Yes." "Good. You have that chance so please give me my phone." I state holding out my hand. "Promise me that you won't leave until I tell you `I'm finished'. Will you do that for me?" he looks so sad as he asks. "I give you my word. Now my phone. Please!" Greg reaches into his pockets for my phone and holds it unsure whether to give it back. We both have given our word and he decides to hand me my phone. "What I was trying to say is I admire you. What I saw that day was a person that just being themself. I admit I didn't realize it that day but I did come to realize that. I was so fascinated by you. I made every excuse to come by your office or at least near it just so I could see you. I saw what a kind and thoughtful person you are. Stopping to ask someone how they are, if they are feeling better after having been sick. Answering someone's question but not just answering it, explaining it in a way that they could understand it. I listened with great interest as you took an interest in your colleagues. Not many will take the time and care as much as I see in you. "I watched as you and Chuck interacted with each other and I wondered about the two of you. May I ask you how long you have been together?" I looked at him puzzled. "What do you mean? Chuck and I are not together." Now it was his turn to look at me with a puzzled expression. "You and Chuck aren't lovers?" "No! What in the hell gave you that idea?" "Just the way you flirted with him. Well maybe flirted isn't the right word. Your body language with him is very...I guess sexual. It is like watching 2 lovers that have this choreographed seduction. Yet spontaneous." "I don't know what you are talking about. You are imagining things." I disregard his observation. "No, you just can't see it because you are in it. But it is there. I saw it enough times to know. And he goes right there with you. It's not just you. Both of you do it." "Greg! Chuck and I are just friends" I vehemently point out. "Ok! I believe you. The whole time I was watching you two I was jealous." What did he just say? Did Greg just say he was jealous of something that isn't real? "Greg, why were you jealous of something that wasn't real?" He just looked at me and didn't say anything. "Why Greg?" "I don't know?" he shrugged "Uh uh. That's a child's answer. Tell me why." This was very uncomfortable for him. He looked like a deer caught in lights. "I don't...I guess I...well you just..." I have never seen him at a loss for words. Wow! "Come on. Tell me. Why?" I gently persuaded. "Because it isn't supposed to be him" he finally said. I could see it in his eyes. That is what he thought. He was jealous of Chuck. The green eyed monster was doing a number on Greg. But it was more than just jealousy. I think he truly hated Chuck and it pained him to see me with Chuck. "Ok. Keeping in mind it never was. There never was a Chuck and me. So if not Chuck, then who?" I asked. "I just don't see you with him!" fire practically shot out of his eyes. Oh yes, Greg was definitely not a fan of Chuck. "It should be someone else. Someone that fits you better, is a better match for your wit and temperament. Someone that doesn't see you as competition but as an equal. Someone that can be your companion." He stopped there. He did not explain further. He just stood there huffing like a bull. What was Greg saying? Companion? Did he feel for me as I did for him? "Greg, are you saying that someone is you?" He stepped forward and looked me in the eye. Possessive. That's what I saw. Possessiveness. "I'm saying not him." He reached out and touched my arm. "Please Tim. Not him." ******* This is my first attempt. Please be kind with any feedback. If you are interested in more from this storyline, let me know. I have more to tell about Greg and Tim. You can email me at luvsthickmen@yahoo.com