Date: Wed, 15 Jan 2003 13:30:03 EST From: JuilianJ@aol.com Subject: the story of us part 8b THE STORY OF US BY: Julien This story is 100% fictional and is by no means depictive of the life of any person, place or thing. It contains sexual activities between males and should only be read if it is legal to do so in your area. Read at your own risk and enjoy. Comments are welcomed and would be very much appreciated. ENJOY! There will be many flashback sequences in this story so as not to confuse anyone, when a flashback takes place, there will be an asterisk (*) before the start of that flashback. I'm dedicating this little piece to Thomas (you know who you are). Continue reading and you'll know why!!! I opened my eyes slowly and had to shut them quickly as the light came flooding in. I heard the shuffling of feet around me and a voice scream 'doctor he's awake'. All the commotion around me grew into excitement as many voices and feet traveled around me. Finally I was able to open my eyes again, this time there was nothing to drown me as the light all but disappeared. A man in a white lab overcoat stood over me and began speaking, "Good evening Richard. Glad to see you've awoken. Do you know who you are?" "Yes." "Can you please state your name for me please?" "Richard Lyn. Where am I? What am I doing here?" "You my friend are at Mount Sinai in our Trauma Unit." He paused then continued, "and you've been in a coma for the last three and a half months." I couldn't think, I couldn't speak then all of a sudden for some reason I couldn't breathe. "He's hyperventilating, I need an oxygen mask here!" The nurse handed him a mask, which he gently put over my head. I felt my breath slowly returning and my breathing come back to normal. "I think I should explain to you the nature of your injuries." With that he ushered the nurses and orderlies out of the room and then proceeded to pull up a chair beside my bedside. "Three and a half months ago, your car was blindsided by a delivery truck. The impact caused your lung to shatter as well as your rib cage to break in at least sixteen places. You broke both your hands and legs and almost bled to death. Technically, you did die but our EMT crew was able to revive you and keep you alive till you were able to get some here to the hospital. You are one lucky man Mr. Lyn. Usually if a patient does not awaken from a coma within two weeks, there isn't much we are able to do." My mind was nothing but a blur. I couldn't remember the accident or anything immediately following it. "I don't remember the accident." "Don't worry, amnesia is usually a side effect of head trauma, especially the degree of head trauma that you have endured. Within the coming days you should start to get snippets of memory here and there but I should warn you, you may experience some paranoia as well as nightmares stemming from this. I would recommend you get some help while here with us and when you are released." "How long do I have to say here?" "We are going to run a few tests on you to make sure you are healing properly and to make sure that there is no additional trauma to you brain. And if everything comes back ok, you could be released as early as Thursday next week. By the way, I have notified your brother and a Mr. Knight that you've awoken, your brother is outside waiting to see you." And just hearing his name after so long brought back the painful memory of that day full force and again I started to hyperventilate. "Nurse, Nurse, get me 10mm of cryogen phosphate stat." He shouted to a passing nurse then he began to speak to me, "You need to calm down Mr. Lyn, breathe, breathe, breathe." And at his instructions, I took deep breaths and breathed. Moments later the nurse came running in with a needle and handed it to the doctor. "What I'm going to inject you with is a mixture of morphine and a phosphate amphetamine, it will assist you with your breathing and will keep these hyperventilating episodes to a minimum. You will also feel a bit drowsy. Now you will feel a little prick." And with that, he stuck me with the needle and stood over me as I promptly lost consciousness. "Is he going to be ok?" "Yes and no. He seems to be coherent but these hyperventilating spells seem to be brought on by some defense mechanism. With that said, I'm going to have to discontinue any visitors from coming into his room, at least until I get back the test results." "And how long will that take?" "It could take anywhere from two days to two weeks." "Two weeks!" "It's for his own safety Mr. Lyn. He could choke on anything from his own spit to his own vomit if his breathing passage starts to close up again. You can still visit him when he's asleep but when he's awake, I won't allow any visitors whatsoever." "Ok but can you please tell him that everyone's praying for his safe recovery?" "You can tell him yourself." I felt a hand on mine and then I heard my brothers' voice, "Richie, I know that I haven't always been there for you but I'm here now and I'm not going any where. Everybody's' praying for you and everybody's' missing you." His voice broke as if he were crying and I wanted to get up and tell him I was ok but I couldn't move. "Can he hear me?" "Yes, just fine." "Well when he's up can you please give him these. A friend of his has been writing these letters for him since the accident. I know it will mean a lot to Richie." "Will do Mr. Lyn and I will give you a call when he is well enough to receive visitors." "Thank you." I heard footsteps, a door close and then silence again. TWO WEEKS LATER "When is check out time?" "You make it sound like a damn hotel." "Michael!" "12:30 give or take a few minutes. By the way, do you know if your doctor is available?" "Michael!" I warned again "Ok, Daddy, forget I asked, I'll find out for myself." And I had to laugh at Michaels' antics. With everything that had happened, he had actually surprised me by being there for me during my recovery period, something that I wouldn't have expected from him. "Nice flowers. Who sent them?" I looked over at the vase on my dresser and frowned. "Who else?" "You still haven't called him yet?" "Nope." "And why is that?" "Michael!" "Don't Michael me Richie. Why the hell haven't you called him yet? He's been asking about you like crazy, if I weren't sane I might actually say the man was smitten over you." "Well he's not and I'm not interested in him." And that was the truth or at least what I kept telling myself. In the past two weeks or so, I had been catching up with the outside via videos, newspapers and of course email (via my laptop). And of course there were the letters from none other than Bobby himself. I had to admit that my initial anger at him had vanished into thin air leaving in me a gaping hole right where my heart should have been. I still yearned for him and because of that, I refused to answer his letters, acknowledge his phone calls and visit with him when he made the trip to see me. I know that I may have seemed like a jerk to a lot of people but it was my way of protecting myself from hurt again. "Then why do you still have these?" I broke out of thought and looked up at Michael. In his hands he held a stack of letters that Romeo himself had written and sent to me. "That's none of your fucking business." I sneered grabbing the stack from him. He held up his hands defensively and apologized. "I'm sorry Michael. I'm just not ready to..." "It's ok Richie." "No it's not. You've been so supportive of me through this fucking mess and now I'm treating you like shit. I really appreciate what you've done for me, past and present." "Just trying to redeem myself Richie, just trying to redeem myself." And I wasn't sure if he was being serious or not but if he was, he had long ago done that. "What would I do without you Michael?" "You'd have a boring existence Richie." I laughed and allowed him to help me into a wheelchair. "That I would." And as he wheeled me out into the parking lot, I couldn't help but think that this was going to be where the real test begun. On a night when I had begun to feel ill again because of the medication, I took up residence in the corner of my kitchen surrounded by a pitcher of chilled water and for some strange reason, the letters I had received from Bobby. This morning ritual had been going on for the past month and a half and sometimes the pain would get so intense that I had to bite down on an old wooden board. The doctor had warned me that this would happen and that it was better if I were with someone when it did. And of course I had to be me and not tell a soul but tonight I began to feel something that I had not felt before, fear, anguish, a feeling of dread and I knew that I needed someone. I stretched for the phone only to have it just out of my reach. "Shit!" I cursed to myself and once again tried to grasp it. I felt the antenna in the palm of my hands and pulled on it hard bringing the entire phone system tumbling on the floor beside me. The feeling in my chest got heavier as I dialed the only number I could remember. And as it began to ring, I could feel my breathing get shallow and my fingers get numb and the last thing I remember before passing out was hearing the sound of his voice. "Richie, goddammit man, wake up?" My eyes fluttered open at the sound of my name and I had to quickly shut them as the light penetrated. "Take your time Mr. Lyn. Your eyes will take a few minutes to adjust to the light." And once again I attempted to open my eyes and succeeded. Everything seemed twice as bright as it normally would be and I had to keep blinking. "Dim the lights will you?" I didn't recognize the voice but soon enough the intensity of light was reduced to just a few watts, barley visible. "Can you turn your head Richard?" I moved my head to the left with minimum ease and I heard myself moan in obvious pain. A pair of hands started up my neck and continued to my chin before retracing its' steps. "What you feel now is a discomfort of your spine. It will be felt most in your neck but in a few months it should diminish and maybe in a year or two it will go away all together." "What happened to me?" I managed to ask, not recognizing my own voice. "You had a fainting spell." "A fainting spell?" "Yes. It's one of the side effects of your medication. It can be a scary thing to experience, which is exactly why I wanted you to be with somebody when it did." "I thought I could handle it. It was never this bad before and I never passed out before." "It was not serious, this time but it could have been a whole different matter if you fell and hit your head on the side of a counter or on a kitchen table. For this reason I am going to strongly recommend that you stay with your brother or a friend for at least the next month or so. By that time we will have at least seen what the medication has or has not done for you." "Fine. Will I be able to go back to work anytime soon? I have a client and..." "You're not going anywhere." I turned to my left and for the first time noticed Bobby standing there. My face flustered and I tried to turn away but he was too quick for me, initiating and maintaining eye contact. "Excuse me?" I was annoyed that he thought he had the God given right to make any decision concerning me. "I have to also recommend that you take some time off from work." The doctor chimed in, passing looks between Bobby and myself. "I can't! In my line of work you can be in today..." I paused, and turning to Bobby, continued, "Gone tomorrow. I can't take the time off, I just can't." "Well I can't force you Mr. Lyn but I will give you the realities of the situation. For the next month at least, you will feel continuous discomfort in your neck, not to mention the nausea and cold sweats that you will undoubtedly face after each does of medication. You can expect sudden paralysis once in a while, also periods where you won't be able to walk much less get out of bed. So with that said, you may decide to rethink your position." I didn't say anything and neither did he. "I have to go and check on some of my other patients but I will be back to sign your release forms. By then, hopefully, you will have changed your mind." And with that he walked out closing the door behind him. It seemed like only a second after he had left, Bobby spoke, "I spoke to Laurence and he says that you should take the time off. Diane agrees with him too Richie, your health..." "Is none of your concern." "What is your damn problem? I practically save your damn life and you don't even have the damn decency to say thank you." "Well I didn't fucking ask for it." "Actually you did, you called me." And realizing that he was telling the truth, I said the only thing I could. "It was a mistake." The scowl etched unto his face was priceless. To actually see how much I could push his buttons gave me back some control, not much but enough to get by. "A mistake? A mistake! I should have left your ass lying there." "Yeah you should have, it wouldn't' have been the first time." "What the hell is that supposed to mean?" "What the hell do you think?" "You know what Richie, I don't need this unnecessary hassle. I don't know what the hell you want from me!" "I don't want anything from you man, not a damn thing." And though I might have convinced Bobby, I knew I hadn't believed that for a minute. "Whatever man. Good luck on your recovery." And with that he had walked out on me once again. 'I don't need him anyway. When has he ever been there for me.' I thought as I tried my hardest to be mad at him, angry, upset even but all I ended up feeling was guilt at myself for being so ungrateful. And by the time I got a nurse into my room to call him back, he was already gone. I had been standing outside his door for the longest time, wanting to knock, wanting to see him but the yellow in me seemed to rearing to come out and I did nothing. And just as I was about to walk away, the door opened he stepped out. "Richie!" He seemed surprised to see me, maybe because I was in such a sad state, having not shaved in a week and my hair growing out of control. "You going out." I said stating the obvious. He was dressed in a two-piece suit, Armani I think and a top hat to match. He had that gangsta look going on, something that I had never seen on him before and I had to admit, he was at the top of his game tonight. "Yeah but..." "I could come back." And as I turned to leave, he grabbed my shoulder. "Yeah but I'm early. Thing doesn't start till ten thirty." "Ok." We just stood there staring at each other. "This is stupid, you want to come in?" "Yeah, sure, thanks." "No problem. So, what brings you to my neck of the woods?" I was looking for anything that would give me the reason I needed to leave, I didn't see it. "I just, I...I wanted to say...I wanted to tell you thanks for all that you did for me." "Your Welcomed. I would have done it for anyone that needed it." And by him saying that, I felt as if he were comparing me to any one else, as if I could have been a homeless man and it would not have made a difference. "Oh. Well that's all I came here to say." And I got up to leave. "Richie wait!" "What!" I had to get out of there before I broke down. "I didn't mean that." "The hell you didn't!" "No I didn't. I...shit! I just didn't expect to see you tonight. I thought you didn't want to see me again." "I lied." "What's going on with you?" "I don't know. I just don't know. I feel stupid being here." And once again I tried to leave. "Goddammit Richie! For once will you just stay still and tell me what the fuck is the matter." "No, I got to go..." "Why? What the hell are you rushing home to?" "Nothing! We all can't be as lucky as you to have invitations to go out to all these nice places." "Dammit Richie, stop feeling sorry for yourself, because if you expect pity from this end you won't get it." "I don't want anything from you." "Then stop acing like you do." That one caught me off guard. "What?" "You keep saying that you don't want anything from me but your actions tell me a totally different story. Now I think it's time you put up or shut up." "There's nothing to put up." I looked at the clock above his head and saw that it was minutes to ten. "It's almost ten." "So." "So what about your appointment?" "Fuck my appointment, we're talking about you and me." "You and me." I echoed. "Yeah, you and me." "Well there is no you and me." "Is that how you want it?" Was he really asking what I thought he was asking? I needed to find out. "What do you mean if that's how I want it?" "Forget it!" And for once I didn't back down, this was too important to back down from and as my heartbeat sped up I asked him the question again. "I said forget it!" "And you're telling me to put up or shut up. Why don't you put up or shut up." "What, you got some balls now." "Fuck you!" And once again I tried to walk away and this time he didn't stop me. "Richie I want us to..." he stopped and so did I. Maybe he was going to say what I wanted to hear. Maybe once and for all he would tell me what I needed to hear, what I always needed to hear from him. "Say it will you." And taking a deep breath he said, "I want our friendship back, for good this time." And it was a bittersweet moment for me. I wanted that too but at the same time I wanted so much more. I wanted him to tell me that he loved me too. That he needed me as much as I needed him. That we could take this relationship to the next level, but it was not to be. I had to consign myself to that reality and stop this fantasy that I had about us, because that was all it would ever be, a fantasy. "No more bullshit, I promise you that. Nothing will ever stand in the way again, not Ernie, not my music not anybody or anything." Bobby..." "I know I've taken you for granted all too long but I want you to know that I've never had a relationship like this where I felt I could trust someone completely. I trust you Richie, with all my heart and soul." "You mean that?" "Hell yeah! I wouldn't lie about something like that. I would have never made it this far without you." "You sure wouldn't" he started to laugh. "We have a lot of issues we need to work through." I offered. "I know and we will work through them, which Is why I want you to stay here." "Here?" "Yeah. We'll kill two birds with one stone. I can look out for you just like the doctor ordered and we'll be able to spend some time together like we used to, before all of this." And I had to be real. Could I really handle living with Bobby for any period of time with the way I felt about him? Could I control my urges? Could I hide them? It seemed like an awful risk to take. "Bobby I don't know." "I know that it will be hard for you with everything that has happened but I know that this is what we need. Think of it this way. It'll be like summer camp." With that he smiled that smile at me, melting the ice around my heart. And I knew that I couldn't turn him down. "Just until I'm well enough to go back to work and not a day longer." "Ok. Roomie." Again I looked up at the clock and saw that it was way past ten thirty. "I'm sorry I made you missed your appointment." "Forget it. It was worth it and you were worth it." And with that he put his arm around my shoulder and led me into his den where we would no doubt be listening to music. A beautiful end. THE END IS HERE OF PART 1. YOU DIDN'T ACTUALLY THINK I WOULD END THE STORY LIKE THAT DID YOU? ANYWAY I AM AT A CROSSROADS AS I DO REALLY WANT TO FINISH THIS UP AND SOON. I NEED SOME PUBLIC OPINION AND QUICK. WOULD YOU LIKE TO HEAR THE CONTINUANCE VIA RICHIE'S P.O.V. OR WOULD YOU PREFER A CHANGE AND HEAR IT FROM BOBBY'S P.O.V. THE SOONER YOU LET ME KNOW, THE SOONER I CAN GET IT STARTED. I WOULD LOVE TO HEAR FROM ALL OF THOSE THAT HAVE BEEN FOLlOWING THIS FROM THE VERY BEGINNING. You know who you are!!!!