Date: Mon, 11 Aug 2003 11:59:01 -0500 From: Paul Wilson Subject: Doctor's Visit I recently read a post on the Gymnopedes web site about a boy's experience with a very detailed physical examination with his mother present in the room. It was a pretty exciting post, as it reminded me of my experience with physical exams from my family doctor when I was a kid. The events I'm about to relate were not witnessed by my mother, thankfully, as she stopped going in with me by the time I was 9 or 10. I started masturbating at an early age, probably 6 or 7 years old, mostly by laying on my pillow and humping it, and by climbing on small trees or poles and wrapping my legs around them tightly so my little penis was stimulated. There wasn't any sexual connotation to me about this; I just did it because it felt good and left me feeling relaxed and happy afterwards. I'm sure many people saw me doing this, as I didn't try very hard to hide it because I saw nothing wrong with it, though I also didn't flaunt that behavior when other people were around. And I have on several occasions witnessed small boys doing the same thing, so finding stimulation by climbing things seems far more common than I thought back in those formative years. I thought I was the only one who had discovered that trick. Funny I would think that, because I noticed other boys hanging on things in a similar way, but never thought they were experiencing what I did when I did it. Dumb me. I actually lived next door to a family with a small child several years back, and from about age 7 to 9 it seemed he almost lived on the support pole to his swing set in the back yard. It was so obvious what he was doing, but apparently his mother didn't mind, and he was getting good exercise! There was another boy who lived in a different house who always seemed to have this large teddy bear with him in the back yard when he was playing, and every so often he'd go out behind the shed in his back yard so he was shielded from sight from his house, pull his pants down, and mount the teddy, humping it happily until he jerked and stopped, and I could see he had a little stiffy when he got up and pulled his pants back up. He was probably about 6 the first time I witnessed that, and he did it for several years. He had a friend who would come over every so often, and they'd take turns humping that poor teddy, who got a lot of use from those little boys. I found it kind of funny that they did it behind the shed so they couldn't be seen from his house, but I could see clearly from my house, and enjoyed watching the frequent show as they pleasured themselves with that bear (or in the case of the other boy, his swing set). I never felt self conscious about being naked in front of my doctor during my yearly physical exams. He was always very matter-of-fact about it, and I had nothing to hide. But I did enjoy the pleasant feelings when he manipulated my penis and foreskin as part of the exam, and I looked forward to the times when his warm hand manipulated me. It felt somehow different than when I did it. I was always very aware of the nice feelings I got by holding and playing with my penis, and by about 10 years old or so I was masturbating with my hand more than by rubbing on things. By then of course doing my tree or pole climbing in public was not an option, as I was more aware of the embarrassment of being seen doing it, and in bed at night or while watching TV it was move convenient to just put my hand in my pants and play around. When I was 12 the doctor did my first rectal exam. It was right after he had done the hernia thing where he'd hold my genitals gently, stick his finger up into my groin and tell me to cough, then manipulated my foreskin, pulling it back to make sure I was clean and healthy underneath (I washed there frequently, which was as much for the good feelings I got when I did it as for cleanliness). This time he had me climb up onto the exam table still naked and lay on my side with my knees up so my butt was sticking out on his side of the table. I didn't know what to expect, but he explained what he was going to do, which sounded kind of gross. He said he was going to feel my prostate to make sure it was OK. I had no idea what a prostate was or where it was, so I just lay there wondering what this was all about. He put a rubber glove on his right hand and got some lubricating jelly, which he smeared around my butt hole and on his index finger. It was cold at first, but warmed up as he rubbed it around. Then he said he was going to insert his finger, but would do it very slowly so it wouldn't hurt me, and told me to relax down there. I did my best to relax as I felt his finger start to glide into me just a little at a time. At first it hurt a little, but he was very slow and gentle, and I had to admit to myself that it felt pretty good. I'd had a lot of things come out of me down there before, but never anything go in, and it was an odd, filling feeling. He finally got his entire finger into me, then started rubbing it around, and that felt even better. But then he found his intended target, and started rubbing it. I found out later that was my prostate, and boy, it felt good. I popped a little boner almost instantly, and was glad the doctor couldn't see it. He felt around a little while, then pulled out, much to my disappointment. He then told me to lay on my back so he could check out my stomach (you know, when they thump and push feeling for who knows what), and my little boner was sticking up, very obvious, I blushed with embarrassment. The doctor chuckled and said not to worry about that because prostate stimulation caused that reaction in a lot of boys. I really didn't understand "prostate" stimulation, but when I got home I was determined to find out more, so looked up the words in my dad's big dictionary. Nothing much was said in it, but it did say what the prostate was (but nothing about it feeling good), and the word stimulation had several definitions, a couple of which with positive connotations which implied pleasure, and I kind of put them together to realize that what I had experienced was pleasure from my prostate being stimulated. I decided to look up the word "masturbation" to see what it said about that, and about all it said was "sexual self-stimulation." Those words pretty well confirmed what I had deduced about the doctor's comment about "prostate stimulation." A good feeling from stimulating the prostate, just as masturbation was a good feeling from stimulating the penis. Things were starting to come together for me, and I realized that there was a relationship between the good feelings I got when playing with my penis and the good feelings I got when the doctor played with my prostate. I was becoming a great scientist, eh? Being a normal, precocious 12 year old, I immediately began experimenting to see if I could duplicate the pleasant feeling I'd felt at the doctor's office. I started putting things up my butt, lubricated with Vaseline, like pens, pencils, anything small enough to fit without hurting. Even my fingers, but I couldn't reach that spot that felt so good. It felt good to have things up there, but I didn't get the same feeling as when the doctor stimulated my prostate. Then one day I tried a candle that was long enough to reach my prostate, and I felt that feeling again. I found that playing with the candle inside me while masturbating made it feel even better, and soon I was incorporating my candle in my nightly routine, and loving it. In my day-to-day travels, I was always on the lookout for something better to use than the candle, since it was stiff and hard, and I thought something softer might be more comfortable. Then one day my searching was rewarded by finding a six inch piece of soft rubber in the garage. It was about 3/4 inch in diameter, a perfect size for careful insertion without hurting, and was flexible enough to bend, but stiff enough that it would hold its shape. I had no idea what it was, but I knew immediately when I saw it that it had possibilities. It was blunt at both ends, so I had to whittle one end so it would fit comfortably into my butt, and when I was done I had the first dildo of my young life, though I had no idea such things existed, other than in my own mind. I had to try it out right away, so I ran up to my room, locked the door, got naked, and lay on my bed in anticipation. I lubed up my rubber dildo, lay on my side, and slid it in. Oh, it felt great, and I found I could get it right to the right spot without having to wiggle it around like I had to with a candle. I was so excited I came with only a few strokes of my hand on my penis, forgetting to put anything on my bedspread to catch the mess (I had a hand towel under my mattress for that purpose. I lay there panting, realizing the nasty little thing I had discovered was going to give me a lot of fun and pleasure. My normal routine at night was to study in my room, get a snack, then go to bed and masturbate before going to sleep, often using something up my butt for extra stimulation. Not long after I initiated my new toy, I was sitting there reading some boring homework assignment, and got to thinking how good my toy felt in my butt. And I got a new idea. I went to where I hid it, pulled my pants down and inserted it up into my butt, then pulled my pants back up and carefully sat down again at my desk. It was such a turn on to be sitting there in plain sight, with my door open, with my rubber dildo in my butt. I found that by rocking back and forth a little, it would push in and out just enough to stimulate my prostate. My penis was hard in my underpants, and I was feeling more and more horny, and suddenly I came right in my pants. It made a Hell of a mess in my underpants, but boy, did it feel good. That was the first time I came without even rubbing my penis, though it was rubbing on the fabric of my clothes. I learned to put a couple of paper towels in my underwear to catch the mess, because I was soiling too much of my underwear and I was afraid my mother would notice when doing laundry. That technique became a favorite. I even did it at school in class a couple of times. I had one particularly boring English class where I sat in the back of the room, and I got to thinking of interesting possibilities. I'd sneak my dildo into school in my bookbag, and between classes go to the restroom to insert it, walking to English class carefully so it wouldn't come out. Then in class I'd rock myself slowly and gently, and spurt into the paper towels in my underwear. The fear of being caught made it particularly exciting. After class I'd go back to the bathroom, take out the paper towels and finish cleaning up, removing and wiping off the dildo, and go about the rest of the day with a warm glow. A year after my first rectal exam which started all this, I learned I had another appointment for a physical about a week ahead of time. I had mixed feelings. On the one hand I was excited about the prospect of the doctor fingering me again, but on the other I was afraid the stimulation would get the better of me and I might orgasm while he did it, since I had perfected that technique so well. When the day came I went in with a little trepidation. When the doctor did his hernia and foreskin thing, I got hard as a rock, which was embarrassing. But he pretended nothing was out of the ordinary, and I figured that must happen to a lot of boys. But my arousal was at a peak by the time he had me lay on my side on the table, and he went through the same slow, gentle penetration he'd done the year before. But this time I was already hard and aroused, and as soon as he started massaging my prostate, I tensed and shot. The first shot went all the way up to my chin, and three or four ropes of semen shot out onto the paper that covered the table. I was mortified because I knew the doctor could see the jets of semen, and my sphincter muscle clamped down on his finger at each throb. I was panting heavily. The doctor remarked, "My word, we seem to have a hair trigger here," and handed me a handful of tissues to clean up with as he had me roll back onto my back. I cleaned up, but as he was thumping my stomach, semen kept dribbling out of my now deflating penis. I stammered an apology, but the doctor just said "Don't worry about it, that's not an unknown reaction. I assume, at your age, you've been practicing." When I got up I looked at the globs on the paper, and the doctor chuckled, saying that's why they cover the exam table, and proceeded to pull the paper down as new paper came off the roll, and tore it off and stuffed it in the trash can. "No harm done, see?" The next year when I had my exam, just before the prostate check, the doctor asked with a chuckle, "Are we going to have another hair trigger situation today?" I was embarrassed, and answered, "Maybe." He handed me a couple of tissues and said, "Just in case." Well, of course it was a repeat of the last year, and I shot an even more copious amount onto the table. The year before I had stifled my usual grunting when I came, but this time I didn't, and I panted out an "Oh, Oh, Oh," at every shot. After I finished, the doctor said, "It looks and sounds like you really enjoy this," and got serious for a moment. He asked if I masturbated by sticking things into my rectum. I reluctantly said yes, figuring that was a strange thing to do. He replied he figured as much, since my rectum was a little looser than was usual for a boy my age but that many boys like to do that. Then he said that I had to be careful not to put anything sharp in there, or get anything in so far I couldn't get it out. He said a surprising number of boys have to go to the emergency room to get things removed, and it was very embarrassing. I agreed. He asked what I used, and I told him about the rubber dildo (I didn't know that name, so I just called it a "rubber thing"). He said that sounded pretty safe, but just be careful. This time I pulled the paper off the table and replaced it, saying, "It's the least I can do since I made the mess." It was the same every year that I went back to that doctor until I went off to college. I had gotten over the embarrassment with my family doctor, but didn't want to do that with a new one, so from then on I made sure I masturbated just before going for a physical exam so I wouldn't have an ejaculation during the rectal exam. But it probably wouldn't have been a problem anyway, because every doctor who did it after that was a lot rougher. They'd just lube up and jam their finger in, none too gently. I realized I had been lucky with our family doctor that he was so gentle and made sure he didn't hurt me. It didn't occur to me until years later that perhaps he enjoyed doing it slowly, and was pleased to see that he could make me orgasm like that. I don't know, and never will. I just thank him for showing me what has become one of my lifetime's best pleasures. I did have one friend who found out about my dildo, because he found it on my bedside table, with my jar of Vaseline, one day when I'd forgotten to put it away. He held it up and looked at it, and asked what it was. I didn't know how to answer, and the way I turned red and stammered without any coherent answer gave my secret away. He asked, "You put this up your butt?" with an incredulous voice. I just nodded. He thought about it a minute, and asked if I could show him. I was reluctant, but agreed, and soon I was on my side naked, slipping my toy into my butt while he watched. I came pretty quickly onto my hand towel, and he asked if he could try it. I said OK, but I needed to wash it first. I got dressed and went to the bathroom to wash it off, then took it back to him. He stripped down and got into the same position. He tried to get it in, but was having trouble, so I said, "Here, let me show you," and put it at the entrance to his hole and put it in very, very slowly, like my doctor had done with his finger. It took a little while, but soon I had it in there, and felt for where I thought his prostate would be. I could tell when I found it, because he gasped and seemed to like it. I rubbed it around in him, and he attacked his penis furiously, and quickly came all over my hand towel. He just lay there panting, and then cleaned off his penis as I pulled the dildo slowly out of him. He said that was the best he'd ever felt. He'd heard of things like that, but never tried it before. We were both a little embarrassed at what we had done, but he was back a couple of days later and asked if he could try it again. This time he said, "You've used this in English class, haven't you?" with a broad smile on his face. I was shocked that he had figured that out, and admitted it. "You're braver than I am," he said. We shared that piece of rubber from age 14 until at least 17 when we separated to go to different colleges. It was fun having someone to do it with. By the way, I still have my old original rubber dildo, and use it frequently. I find it better than the ones you can buy.