Marine Squad Sierra Foxtrot

Chapter 9:

It's only been a week since all of the drama of Matt's melt-down, but things seem to be going alright. I've been keeping a very close on eye on him and talking to him about what he experienced and what he's feeling. He has trouble putting it into words sometimes, but just having someone there willing to share your nightmare would be helpful; at least I hope it is. Matt's also been talking to Gunny quite a bit. None of us ever knew this about him, but apparently he was in Iraq when he lost his best friend. They had been in a supply truck, his best friend sitting less than two feet away when his head exploded from the bullet that went into it. Gunny had told Matt that it kind of reminded him of J.F.K's assassination; the back of his head blowing out over the trunk of the car. He also told Matt that he'd been really fucked in the head about it for almost a year; that they'd been as close as Josh and I, just without the sexual part of the relationship.

Speaking of relationships, the budding whatever it is between our newest brother and Mark seemed to be progressing. Somehow they had managed to keep it secret from everyone else, but I figured time was against them. I asked Mark yesterday if he were in love with Drew and he grinned, but said he wasn't going to allow himself to fall in love with a straight boy; that he wanted what Josh and I had, not just a fuck buddy. I told him it was probably a good idea; no sense opening yourself up to someone that may not be able to return your feelings. He also told me that they had done it; that he'd let Drew fuck him and he'd loved it. I grinned and told him I was happy for him. In some perverse way I was kind of bummed that I wasn't his first. I know I have Josh, but I guess there's always been a part of me that thought Mark would let me be his first. I know he told me he wasn't in love with me, but like my better half I kind of thought he might be. Maybe I was just being arrogant.

We'd been out on patrol all day and it was now close to 1600 hours and we were headed back. I wanted to get back and call Logan; I hadn't talked to him in a couple of days and I wanted to know how he was. I was with Gunny, Matt, Scott and Pete; Gunny teaming me up with Matt now every time he's been back out on patrol; which has only been the last couple of days. Gunny had finally chilled out about what we had done, but we were all on our best behavior around him. The one advantage to going on patrol with Gunny was we usually got to take the Humvee; we didn't have to walk everywhere. We were just pulling into camp and I called up to him from the back.

"Hey Gunny, would it be alright if I called my little brother?"

"Yeah, Joe; just give me a few minutes to take care of some paperwork, then the office is all yours. I need a fuckin' shower in the worst way."

"Thanks; I appreciate it."

Scott was sitting next to him up front and looked over and grinned at him. "We weren't gonna say anything, but yeah, you kinda do."

"Shut up, boy; before I have you in there with me washin' my fuckin' balls."

"I'll let Joe take care of that for ya; he's pretty good at it."

Gunny turns and looks at him, smiling. "Are you tellin' me you have Joe wash your balls for ya?"

"No! I'm just sayin' I've seen him in action; he's fuckin' good at it."

Gunny laughs. "That's way more than I needed to know. Why are you watching him and Josh, anyway; you thinkin' of switchin' teams? Or maybe you're already on their team and too chicken shit to come out." He laughs again.

"Fuck no! I'm not gay, but I have to admit, watchin' them is fuckin' hot; they really go at it."

I yell up from the back. "Hey! Why the fuck're you talkin' about my sex life?"

"'Cause I don't have one, dickhead; shut up! Let the men talk."

"Bend over, asswipe; I'll show you a fuckin' man."

Gunny looks back at Scott. "You're a fuckin' perv, dude. Who watches their buddies havin' sex?"

"You want the entire head count, or just the guys that live in our dorm?"

"Jesus; I'm surrounded by fuckin' pervs."

"Hey, who the fuck has been watchin' us from the other dorm!?"

Scott laughs. "Everyone except Pete."

"Fuckin' hell. You guys need to get a life; Josh and I aren't here for your sexual entertainment."

"Then do it somewhere besides you're fuckin' bed."

"That still doesn't give everyone the right to fuckin' watch and beat off."

"I didn't say nothin' `bout beatin' off; we just watch."

"Christ. You're all a bunch of fuckin' closet case pervs."

"Pervs maybe, but not closet cases."

"Tell yourself whatever you need to help you sleep. Straight boys don't watch guys havin' sex. Gunny, you ever had the desire to watch two guys get it on?"

"Fuck no. You're right, Joe; they're a bunch of fuckin' closet cases. Fuck, who'd of thought it; I'm in command of an entire squad of gay boys." He laughs loudly.

He stops the truck and we all bail out, grabbing our gear and walking towards the dorms. I look over at Scott and shake my head. "Fuckin' closet case."

"Fuck you. I'm not a fuckin' closet case, fag."

Matt grabs him from behind. "You ever say that word to him again and I'll fuckin' kill you where you stand."

"I'm sorry, Matt; I didn't mean nothin' by it. He called me a fuckin' closet case."

"Maybe you are, maybe you're not; but you ever say that word to him again and I'll fuckin' find out. You'll have my fuckin' cock buried in your ass."

"I'm sorry."

"Tell him, not me."

"I'm really sorry, Joe. I didn't mean it that way; it just slipped out."

"Don't sweat it. I'm sorry I called ya a closet case. You have to admit though, it's kinda weird that straight guys find two guys havin' sex so interesting."

"It's kinda like havin' live porn. You use what you can to get off."

"Even so, invitin' everyone in camp to come and watch is fucked up."

"I didn't invite nobody; they just happen to be there sometimes when you guys are doin' something."

"Yeah, whatever." I open the door and let them go in first, holding the door for them. "I'd appreciate it if y'all quit doin' that. It is private between me and Josh, you know."

"OK. I didn't know you had a problem with it. We'll stop watchin'."

"Thank you."

I go into my room while Matt and Scott keep walking to their respective rooms. I get all of my gear off and stowed, then decide I'm sick of being in this uniform. I strip out of it and put on some shorts and a t-shirt; hunting high and low for my tennis shoes. I'm bent over, my head stuck under the bed when someone behind me whistles. I pull my head back and swing around, ready to fight. It's my own boy standin' there.

"Damn, boy, that looks great. Were you waitin' for me to get home?"

I laugh. "Well no, but I'm really glad you are. I was lookin' for my tennis shoes."

"Don't let me stop ya; I love the view."

I blush and grin. "Thanks." I jump up off the floor and walk into him, pulling him in close and kissing him. "Hi."

He smiles. "Hi yourself. Decided to get comfy, huh?"

"Yeah; you wanna get comfy too?"

"Sure. Let me get outta this stuff. Actually I wanna take a shower first, if that's OK with you."

"Of course. You can watch Scott wash Gunny's balls for him."

He laughs. "Do I wanna know?"

"No, you really don't. You don't wanna know anything about that conversation."

"Now I do, but you can tell me after I'm done with my shower."

"You gotta kiss me again first if you want info outta me."

He leans in and kisses me, holding it for about twenty seconds, his tongue exploring my mouth. He pulls back and grins at me.

"Will that get me the required info?"

I grin. "Joseph Christopher Ziegler, Private First Class: United States Marine Corps, Serial Number 326-33-2110.

He laughs. "For that kiss I only get your name, rank and serial number?"

"I'm a greedy bitch."

"Fine, PFC Ziegler; keep your info. I'll be in the shower."

"OK. I'll be in the office, actually; I wanna talk to Logan."

"OK babe, I'll see ya when you get back."

"Do I get another kiss?"

"No, not until I get more than your name, rank and serial number."

"Will you at least tell me where my shoes are?"

He laughs. "They're behind your duffle bag; just where you put `em the last time you wore `em."

I give him a quick kiss. "Thank you, baby. I love you."

"I love you. Go talk to your brother."

"I don't get to watch you get undressed?"

"Only if you help."

"Sure."

Once I have Josh stripped and on his way to the shower, I put my tennis shoes on and head over to the office. I've been whistled at twice in the short walk over here. I'm really starting to wonder about these guys. Maybe they're just really horny from not having any women around, but damn. I'm starting to think me, Josh and Mark could drop to our knees in the chow hall and they'd all line up for blowjobs. I knock on the office door and open it, peeking in. It's empty so I just walk in and sit behind the desk. As I'm opening the laptop Gunny walks in, stark naked and carrying a towel over his shoulder.

"Oh, sorry Joe; I didn't realize anyone was in here." He puts his towel around his waist.

"I'm sorry, Gunny; I thought the office was empty."

"Don't sweat it. I'll be in the shower."

"Keep an eye on Josh for me; I'm startin' to get worried about these guys."

He laughs. "I wouldn't worry too much; besides, Josh can take care of himself."

"I don't know... Fuck, I was whistled at twice just walkin' over here from the dorm."

"You wearin' a g-string or something?" He grins.

"No! I'm just wearing shorts and a t-shirt."

"Eh, don't let `em get to ya; they're just a bunch of horny boys far from home and pussy."

"That's what worries me. It's like everyone here but you, Pete and Tiff would let us suck `em off if we offered."

He laughs. "I wouldn't offer that if I were you; they'd take you up on it."

"I know!"

"Well don't let `em get to ya."

"I won't, it just seems a little weird that straight boys wanna watch us and then whistle at us."

He laughs. "They're just horny; I don't think anyone's gonna attack ya or nothin'."

"No, I doubt it. I think they're all too afraid of what Matt would do to `em if they did try anything. He tore into Scott as we were walkin' back to the dorm."

"Just for what he said in the truck? He was just jokin' around. Do you think Matt's on the edge?"

"No, not because of that. I called Scott a closet case again and he called me a fag. Matt went off on him for callin' me a fag."

"Is that normal for him?"

"Oh yeah, he's told everyone here that if any of them give Josh or me any shit they'd have to deal with him for it. He's always been really protective of us."

"OK. I was just wonderin' about his state of mind. I'm outta here; enjoy your chat with Logan."

"Thanks Gunny. Tell Scott not to use any teeth."

He laughs loudly and walks out of the door. I grin and turn to the laptop, making the call to Logan. He answers after one ring.

"Mark?"

"No, sorry, dude; just your big brother. I can go get Mark if you want."

"NO! Fuck, Joey; I'm glad you called. I haven't seen ya in a couple of days."

"I know; that's why I'm callin'. How's tricks?"

"Eh, you know how it is; if it's not the girls wantin' my body, it's the boys." He laughs.

"Yeah, I know what you mean. How are things with you and Kyle?"

He blushes. "They're fine."

I look at him, grinning. "Only fine? What's goin' on, dude? Spill."

He blushes deeper. "We, ah... we did it."

I smile. "You did what? Robbed a bank?"

He laughs. "No, dufus! We did it; we had sex. We made love to each other."

I smile big. "Really? So how was it?"

"Kinda painful at first, but fuckin' awesome! Joey, I couldn't believe that something like that would feel good. Fuck... I was terrified about lettin' him do me after I did him, but it was fuckin' great."

I smile again. "Yeah, it is. I'm jealous, dude. I had to wait until I was almost twenty-two to find that out."

He grins. "It's not my fault you're a late bloomer." We both laugh.

"So I take it things are gettin' serious with you and Kyle?"

"Yeah... I mean I never thought about him that way before, but I think about him that way a lot now. How do you know when you're in love, Joey?"

"You know it when the other person's happiness means more than your own. You know it when you can't stop thinking about them; can't sleep, can't eat, can't concentrate because all you do is think about them."

He blushes and grins. "Then I'm in love."

I smile big. "That's awesome, Logan! I'm really happy for you!"

"Thanks, I'm pretty happy too. I don't remember being this happy before."

I grin. "You're in love, dude. I can see it in your eyes."

"Really? What do you see?"

I grin. "Think about Kyle for a moment."

He starts to smile and blush. "Right there! You eyes get happy when you think about him."

He smiles. "Really?"

"Yeah, really. I'm happy for ya, little brother." I grin. "This is fuckin' sweet! My baby brother's in love for the first time; fuck yeah!"

He laughs. "Chill, dude. Don't go takin' out ads or nothin'. We gotta keep this low key; you know, the rents."

I sigh. "Yeah, I know; I'm sorry about that part. I would suggest keeping this very low key."

"We are. We actually made love in his room at his house. I told him we couldn't risk being busted here."

"I hear ya. Make sure you do everything at his house. His parents are cool about this?"

"I don't know if they know about us, but they know he's gay; they're very cool with it."

"Well then they'll be cool with you as his boyfriend. I mean, fuck dude, you've been around `em since you were four; who better than you?"

He grins. "My thoughts exactly. They're almost like the mom and dad we should have."

"Eh, don't say that, dude. I love Mom and Dad with all my heart; they're just a little behind the times."

"They're a fuckin' pain in the ass; and not in a good way like Kyle is." He grins.

"Yeah yeah, you're preachin' to the choir. You do love Mom and Dad, don't ya?"

"Of course I do, but they're still a pain. Why do you think I always spend so much time at Kyle's? His house is easier to get along in. His parents are actually fun to be around."

"I know... It's the same reason I spent so much time at Jake's house. Our home life isn't exactly a party, is it?"

"Fuck no; more like a concentration camp."

"Oh, come on; it's not that bad. We have had some good times with `em."

"A few. It's really been dead around here since you left. You're the only thing that made it bearable to be here."

"What's goin' on?"

"Nothing different, I'm just sick of bein' yelled at or ignored."

"I'm sory, Logan; I know what that's like. I guess just spend more time with Kyle and try to avoid `em. I guess if Mark or I call you on this thing you can answer on Kyle's computer, right?"

"Oh sure, I've talked to Mark a few times from Kyle's. How is the horn dog?"

I laugh. "He's great. He and Drew are doin' whatever it is they do."

"Good, I'm happy for him."

"Me too. I'm glad he found someone. Not as glad as I am you did, but damn close."

"Me too. I thought it would be really weird to do things like this with Kyle, and feel this way about him, but it's not; it's fuckin' awesome."

"It is. I think part of it might be you're sixteen and incredibly horny, but I know what you're sayin'."

"I am incredibly horny. What, you're not?"

I blush and grin. "Always, little brother; always."

He laughs. "See, age has nothin' to do with it. I've decided it's a guy thing; we're born horny and we'll die horny."

I laugh hard. "Fuckin Logan... You got that right, dude! I'm surrounded by a bunch of horny fuckers; can you believe the horny baboons have been watchin' me and Josh havin' sex? I just found out today that everyone here, expect for three of `em have watched us."

He laughs his ass off. "That's fuckin' funny, Joey! Fuck yeah!"

"It is not; it's creepy. How would you feel if your friends from school were watchin' you and Kyle and you didn't even know they were?"

"Let `em fuckin' watch! I got nothin' to be embarrassed about! They're just jealous, Joey; you're gettin' laid and they're not. Don't worry about `em."

"It's still kinda creepy. All the ones that are watchin' are supposedly straight; what's up with that? How many straight dudes get off on watchin' gay sex?"

He laughs. "Well I can think of several Marines off the top of my head."

I laugh. "Fucker...I guess... It's just kinda weird. I don't want to watch two women havin' sex; that wouldn't do a thing for me. These baboons are watchin' and beatin' off."

He laughs hard again. "How can you not know they're watchin' if they're beatin' off while they're watchin'?"

"I get really zoned into Josh; I don't hear anything else."

"I guess you better start listenin' to something besides Josh moanin' and callin' out your name." He grins.

"Laugh it up, boy; how many times did you call out Kyle's name while he was plowin' your ass?"

He laughs. "Only about five or six."

"Fuckin' Logan... So did you let him slap your ass while he was plowin' it?"

He laughs. "No! Why the fuck would I want him slappin' me around?"

"Not slappin' you around, dufus; slappin' your ass. It's actually kinda hot. Don't let him fuckin' whale on it, but have him slap it just a little hard; it's fuckin' great, dude."

"You fuckin' perv. Thanks a lot for that mental image. Now I'm gonna be thinkin' about Josh plowin' my big brother and slappin' your ass, yellin' yee haw!" He laughs hard.

I laugh. "He doesn't yell yee haw, dufus. OK, smart-ass, then try it on Kyle the next time you're plowin' his ass. I bet he likes it."

He grins. "Is that a wager I hear commin' outta your mouth?"

"Fuck yeah, boy; I'll put twenty on it. You have to tell me the truth, though."

"I will. I think he's gonna turn around and look at me like I lost my fuckin' mind."

"He won't. I mean don't make his ass red, but give it a nice slap."

He laughs. "Fuckin' Joey... Dude, you've gotten twisted since you been there."

"Look at the baboons I'm surrounded by; what'd you expect?"

"True enough. So how's Matt doin'?"

"He's better. He's still strugglin' a little, but at least he doesn't wanna kill himself."

"You've been bein' you and talkin' to him, right?"

"Yes, I've been bein' me. I care about him a lot; I can't let him suffer."

"I know, Joey; you care about everyone. Take good care of him for his family."

"I will. I love him as much as I love Mark; I won't let anything happen to him."

"Good. He has to get home to his family; just like you and everyone there does."

"We're tryin'; we really are. I kinda felt bad for a few days after I introduced you to Mark and Josh; I thought I was just giving you more people to worry about. I realized you worry about all of us anyway. Thanks, little brother."

"Don't thank me for that. I do worry about everyone over there. I know it's hard for you guys, but you should try it on this side some time; it's fuckin' drastic."

"I'm sure it is; I'm sorry. We're all doing what we feel is right and we're fighting for our country. I'm sorry the families at home suffer too, but we need to be here."

"I know, Joey; that's why I wanna join. I know exactly what you're sayin'. Dad may be a giant pain in the ass, but at least he taught us to be proud of our country and honored to serve it."

"Yeah he did. It's kinda funny, but the first time I remember seeing pride in his eyes was the day I told him I'd joined the Marines."

"We were all proud, Joey."

"I know... So, hey, have you talked to Kaden yet?"

"A couple of times, why?"

"Just wonderin'. Josh asked me about it."

"Yeah, we've talked a few times. Just general type stuff; nothin' personal."

"I wasn't asking that, Logan; I was just curious."

"OK. Yeah, we've rapped. I like him well enough, but he's not really into the same things I am. He doesn't even own a game console."

I smile. "Not everyone lives in front of the T.V. playin' video games."

"I don't! I do other things."

"I know. I'm just sayin' not everyone your age is into video games; it doesn't make `em weird or nothin'."

"What do you mean my age? I've seen you and Jake spend all fuckin' day playin'. And Mark tells me he kicks your ass at "Need For Speed" at least three times a week. Now what?" He grins.

I roll my eyes. "He would tell you that, the little shit. Fine, I'm as guilty as those I accuse. I won't deny I like playin' `em. And Mark does not kick my ass three times a week."

He grins. "That's his version."

"He's warped."

He grins again. "Don't be talkin' shit about my big brother like that."

I laugh. "I was your big brother first; I can talk all the shit I want."

"Yeah, OK." He smiles. "I wuv you, big brudder..."

I laugh. "Too late to kiss up now, boy; you already told me Mark was your big brudder."

He laughs hard. "I'm allowed to have more than one. Besides, I love you most of all."

"I love you most of all, too."

He gives me an evil grin. "More than Josh?"

"Yes." He looks surprised. "Did you really think I didn't?"

"I guess not; I'm just kinda surprised you didn't even have to think about it. I know how much you love Josh."

"There was nothing to think about. I love you more than anything; including Josh. I told Matt the other day that Josh was my one true love, but that's not specifically true. You are; you always have been and always will be. You've been the best part of me for sixteen years."

"You just like seein' me cry, huh?"

I smile. "No; I hate seeing you cry. I don't mean to make you cry, I'm just telling you what you mean to me."

"Oh fuck... I so wanna hug you right now. I so miss being hugged by you; having you to hug me and tell me everything's gonna be OK."

"I'm sorry, Logan. I didn't mean to make you sad. I wish I could hug you, too. I miss our hugs. Hey, I have some more advice for ya. The next time you hug Kyle, just think it's me you're huggin'. I do that sometimes with Josh and it helps."

"Really?"

"Yeah, really. I'll be thinkin' about you and really wishin' I was gettin' one of your great hugs, so I'll hug Josh. It kinda helps."

"You know I love you, right?"

"There's never been a doubt in my mind."

"Good. Don't ever forget it."

"I never do. The same goes for me."

"I know; I've never doubted it either."

"So, are you gonna head over to Kyle's later and hang out with him?"

"I was thinkin' about it. There isn't much goin' on around here. I'm glad I was near the computer when you called."

"I noticed; it only took one ring for you to answer. Been watchin' porn?" I grin.

He smiles. "No... But I was thinkin' about it."

I smirk. "Why? You have the real thing now, why the hell do you need porn?"

He grins. "Well I don't think Kyle wants to do something three or four times a day and I get hard and have to take care of it."

I laugh. "Perv. And look at it this way; if you're hard three or four times a day you can bet good money he is too. Damn, boy, I haven't jacked off one time since me and Josh have been together. I haven't even thought about it; I haven't had to. Get over to that boy's house and give him some cock. Jeez, dude."

He laughs. "Just walk in his room and pull it out, huh?"

"Fuck yeah. I've done that with Josh; he loves it. He says it's kinda kinky and it turns him on."

"Really?"

"Yeah. Hey, I'll let you in on something I discovered. I was really, really fuckin' horny one day." He grins. "And I took him outside and pulled him up against me, letting him feel my hard-on through my pants. I had my hands on his hips, just holdin' him against me. He got hard in like ten seconds. We spent like a minute or so just standing in front of each other, kinda rubbbin' against each other. He was getting more turned on and horny than I was. We went back to our room and I kissed him, playing a little tonsil hockey with him and then just dropped to my knees in front of him. I undid the buttons on his pants, yanked `em down over his ass and just swallowed his fuckin' cock. I sucked him for about six or seven minutes before I even pulled off the first time. I just couldn't get enough of him."

"Fuck, bro; you made my fuckin' dick hard talkin' about that shit. I know you're my brother and all, but that's fuckin' hot."

"Well then get over to your boy's house and try it; I guarantee it'll work. You'll either have a cock in your mouth or your cock in his mouth, but it won't take long. And I bet you could get him turned on every time you do that. Damn, boy, if you're fuckin' horny you have to tell your partner these things; not beat off in front of the computer."

He grins. "You have a really good point. Mark was right; you're good at this."

I turn like sixteen shades of red and he laughs. I just look at him. "Mark told you about that night?"

"Fuck yeah; it sounded fuckin' hot. Like I said, I know you're my brother, but you're fuckin' good at this. Mark really thinks so." He starts laughing and giggling. "Now I remember! The fuckin' spankin'. I already knew you liked that shit; he told me about you slappin' your own ass!"

"Oh man... I gonna kill him. That's just wrong tellin' my little brother about that."

"Don't you dare touch him; he was just tellin' me the story of how you guys got so close. And don't worry about him tellin' your little brother; it's not like I'm twelve or something. And like I said, it was fuckin' hot. I don't mean to freak ya out, but I fuckin' jerked off three times to it the day he told me about it."

"Oh man... I didn't need to know that, Logan. My own brother's jerkin' off to something I did with another dude. That's messed up."

"You just told me in detail about you suckin' Josh's cock and you're worried about what I'm thinkin' about while I jerk off? Give me a break."

"I know, but still... That whole scene behind the building was like surreal; it's like someone else was doin' all that. I'd never done anything like that in my life. I was tryin' to get him hard so I could see his dick."

He girns. "I know, he told me. I guess you did. You got him hard and you got him off." He giggles. "Good game, dude."

"Oh man... this is too weird."

"Oh get over it. I've beat off thinkin' about you several times. It's old news."

"What!?"

"You heard me."

"I know; that's what freaks me out. What do you mean you've beat off thinkin' about me?"

He grins. "I used to watch you jerk off in bed sometimes. I'd be outside in the hall, peeking in through your door and watchin' you. I'd get really turned on and start jerking myself off. The first time I ever came was out in the hall, watchin' you jerk that fat dick. I'm surprised you didn't hear me; I felt like my world had just exploded around me."

I blush crimson. "Oh man... So you've been bustin' loads on my bedroom door for three or four years?"

He laughs his ass off. "No! Well, OK, that first one, cause I wasn't expectin' it. The rest have been into my hand. I'd wipe my hand off on the rug, rubbin' it in real good. A couple of times I tried it; I ate it." He grins.

I shake my head, grinning at him. "Fuckin' Logan... Damn... I guess you're not the first brother to watch his brother beat off, but it's still kinda different for me. It's a mental image I never thought I needed."

He grins. "Hey, if you're good enough for me to bust a nut to, I should be good for the same thing. You can think about my dick all you want."

"Oh man, don't say shit like that; you're gonna have me in therapy. Besides, I haven't seen your dick since you were twelve."

He grins and stands up, dropping his drawers. He's rock hard and pointing it at the damn camera. "There, now you know what it looks like all grown up."

"Put that fuckin' thing away! Dude, we're on the fuckin' internet; you don't need to be whippin' your dick out."

He leans over, staring into the camera and grinning from ear to ear. "Waddaya think? It's not as fat as yours, but it's just as long. And my balls aren't as big, but they're gettin' there."

I shake my head. "Dude, pull your fuckin' pants up. We can't do shit like this."

"Why not; you're my brother? You're checkin' me for a hernia." He laughs.

I laugh; I can't help it. "Dude, just pull your pants up; put that monster away."

"Not until you tell me what you think. You're the cock expert, what do you think of my cock?"

"It's fuckin' sweet, dude; put it away."

He sits back in the chair, laughing. "You're just sayin' that so I'll put it away."

"God, you're as bad as the pervs around here."

"I learned everything I know from you."

"You didn't learn that from me!"

He laughs. "I did in a way. What you did with Mark behind the building wasn't any different, except for the whole internet thing."

"Yeah, but Mark's not my brother."

"Yes he is."

"Well, OK, he's my Marine brother, but not my biological brother."

"It doesn't matter, Joey. So, what'd you think?"

"It's nice, bro; it really is. I'd do ya in a heartbeat if you weren't sixteen and my brother."

"Thanks. I'd do you too; even as my brother. So, other than the night behind the building, have you ever done anything with Mark?"

"Yes."

He smiles. "I want details."

"You can't have `em."

"Oh come on... You know you wanna tell me. You used to always tell me everything."

"Don't play that card. Let's just say when he first told us how he was feelin' he hadn't ever done anything, but was curious to try. Josh and I decided to satisfy his curiosity. We had a three-way blow job."

He grins. "Fucking awesome! Was it good?"

I giggle. "Yeah, it was fuckin' hot."

"I need details, Joey; give me fuckin' details."

"No! You're gonna sit there and beat off if I give you details."

He grins. "I wouldn't do that."

"Yes you would. Go get your man and beat off with him."

"If he's in the room, we're not beatin' off."

"Whatever. Go blow your man. I'm gonna go blow mine."

He grins from ear to ear. "Take pictures."

I start laughing. "Fuck... You're every bit as bad as these baboons. I ain't sendin' you fuckin' pictures of me havin' sex; get over it."

"Then show me your cock; I showed you mine."

"No! Damn, boy, I ain't showin' my fuckin' cock to my little brother."

"I showed you mine."

"I didn't ask to see it."

"So? I'm askin' to see yours."

"Little pervert."

"Yes. Are you hard?"

"No! I'm sittin' here talkin' to my little brother; I ain't hard."

"So, I'm talkin' to my big brother and I'm fuckin' rock hard."

"I know; I saw. Go suck your man off."

"Just show me your cock and I'll leave you alone about it."

"I ain't whippin' my dick out in this office, online to my little brother."

"Oh come on; just a quick flash. Just undo the buttons on your cammos while you're sitting and then stand up for just a few seconds."

"Fucking perv. I ain't wearin' cammos; I'm wearin' shorts."

"Even better; easier to get open."

"No."

"Why not?"

"Because you're my little brother for one. Two, what if someone walks in here or Mom walks into your room? That would be the end of being a Marine and my life as I know it."

"OK, I see your point. I'm sorry, Joey. I'll be good."

"Thank you. Since you're hard and horny why don't you text Kyle and ask him if he is? You can get together and take care of each other's hard-on's."

He smiles. "I already did. He's waitin' for me."

I smile and shake my head. "Fucking perv. Go see your man and take care of business. I'm gonna go see a therapist."

He giggles. "Yeah, Dr. Dick Josh."

I laugh. "Fucker... Have fun with Kyle, Logan; I'll call ya tomorrow."

He smiles. "I will. You have fun with Josh. I love you, Joey."

"I love you too, perv."

"Bye."

"Adios, Dr. Big Cock."

He grins and stands up, giggling, stroking his cock for me and then shutting off the computer. I shake my head and laugh. Fuck... I've had some weird days since I've been here but this one tops the list of the weirdest day of my life. I never would've believed my own brother would not only beat off thinking about me, but show me his dick on a web cam. Between the dick flash and finding out Josh and I have been doing porn for most of the camp I'm starting to get a little freaked out. And to make matters worse I kind of liked seeing Logan's cock; it's really nice and if he weren't my brother I could see myself with it buried down my throat. I shake my head, trying to get that image out of it and stand up. I notice my dick's a little fuller than it was when I sat down. Oh man... I walk outside and go over to Tiff's little bench and take a seat, just looking around and thinking to myself.

I was really creeped out thinking everyone in camp has been watching me have sex with Josh. Now I'm even more creeped out thinking I would have sucked my own brother's dick if given the chance. What the fuck is wrong with me? That's wrong on so many levels I'd be put in a nut hospital and never released. Here I was thinking it was so wrong to have the guys here watching me and now I was thinking about my little brother's dick. What is it with guys? Is it like Logan said; we're just born horny and stay that way until we die? I'd really like to believe there's more to life than sex.

I'd been sitting there for about a half-hour, beating myself up for all of these thoughts when Matt sits next me, looking over at me.

"Hey, are you OK"

I look over at him. "I don't know, Matt; it's been a fucked up afternoon."

"Why; what's goin' on? Did you and Josh have a fight or something? It's not like you to be somewhere without him."

"No, we didn't have a fight. Last I saw him he was heading to the showers. No, man, it's finding out everyone in camp is fuckin' watchin' us have sex; it's really fuckin' with my head."

He smirks. "Don't sweat that; it's not that big a deal, dude. So what if people are watchin'? If they wanna get off watchin' two guys goin'at it, let `em. There's nothin' wrong with it."

I grin. "Of course you'd say that; you're one of the one's watchin'. I mean I know why you watch; you're like the horniest guy I've ever met in my life, but what's up with everyone else? Is everyone here as horny as you?"

He laughs. "Probably. They may not talk about it as much as I do, but chances are they're every bit as horny. Dude, we're all guys and we're all young; we're fuckin' horny twenty-four hours a day. You don't notice it as much `cause you're the only one gettin' any; well you and Josh."

"I just think it's kinda weird that a bunch of straight guys are watchin' two dudes fuckin' and suckin'."

He laughs again. "Bein' straight or gay has nothin' to do with it, dude. Like I told ya, it's like havin' free, live porn; sex is sex. Don't let it get to ya so much. You can't tell me you wouldn't get turned on watchin' someone have sex."

"I wouldn't get turned on watchin' two women havin' sex. That's the part that confuses me. Why are a bunch of straight boys gettin' turned on watchin' gay sex?"

He grins. "I don't know, Joe; maybe it's `cause you and Josh are fuckin' hot together. I know you don't see it from a distance or from someone else's point of view, but you should some day; you guys are fuckin' hot as hell together. We just like watchin'. If it really bothers you we'll stop; I'll pass the word that the free porn shows are over."

"I wonder if Josh knows about this, and what he thinks of it?"

"I don't know; ask him."

"I was gonna but I got kinda freaked out by my brother and needed some time to think about things. Between findin' out I'm a fuckin' porn star and what he did, I'm losing my mind."

He grins. "You'd make a great porn star. What'd your brother do that freaked you out?"

"Well it's not only what he did but what I thought about a little bit after he did it."

"Well, what'd he do?"

"He not only told me he's beat off thinkin' about me, but pulled his fuckin' dick out and showed me his hard-on."

Matt laughs and slaps me on the back. "Fuckin' A! Damn, dude, if you can turn your own brother on you really should think about bein' a fuckin' porn star. That's fuckin' priceless!"

"It is not; it's fuckin' twisted. He's my little brother, he's not supposed to beat off thinkin' about me; much less show me his cock."

He looks at me a few seconds. "That's not what's fuckin' with you; you got turned on seein' him, huh? That's what you meant when you said about what you thought about after he did it. You got turned on seein' your brother's cock, didn't you?"

I blush and turn away. "Yeah, I did a little. How fuckin' twisted and sick is that?"

"Joey, you're bein' way too hard on yourself. First of all, you're gay so you naturally have an appreciation for cock, and seein' your brother sittin' there with a hard on got your attention. It doesn't matter if he's your brother; you saw a hard cock and you liked what you saw. Gettin' turned on by seein' his cock isn't wrong. Doin' something with it would be, but not just gettin' turned on by it."

"How about thinkin' about doin' something with it?"

He grins. "Such as...?"

"I thought to myself that if he weren't my little brother I could see myself with it buried down my throat."

"So what? You said it yourself, if he weren't your little brother... That's the distinction, dude; you were seein' it as nothin' more than a hard cock. Odds are you'll never see him do that again; don't worry about it. If you think about it and you get turned on, fuckin' beat off and go on with life. I get turned on all the time seein' you and Josh doin' something, it doesn't mean I wanna join in; it's just something that turns me on. Don't sweat it so much."

"OK, like you just said, I'm gay and I have an appreciation for cock; what's up with all these straight boys around here wantin' to see cock?"

He laughs. "It's not cock we're lookin' at, dude, its two hot fuckin' guys havin' sex. It's the sex act itself that turns us on, not that you're guys. I don't lay in my fuckin' bed at night dreamin' about your or Josh's cock; I dream about the sex you had, or the cock suckin' action. And I'm not thinkin' about the cock I'm thinkin' about the fuckin' mouth that's on it."

I laugh. "So you just like seein' my mouth wrapped around cock, huh?"

He grins. "Fuck yeah, dude; you're a fuckin' master cocksucker. No offense."

I laugh hard. "None taken, you fuckin' perv. So you think that's all it is with these guys; they just like seein' my mouth in action?"

He laughs. "Fuck yeah. And dude, I've only seen it once, but seein' Josh fuck you is like nothin' else. You have to admit, you have the sweetest fuckin' ass for a thousand miles, and seein' you gettin' fucked is like nothin' else. That hot little ass swallown' that cock is almost the hottest thing I've ever seen; and I've watched a lot of fuckin' porn."

I blush bright red and grin at him. "Fuck... Thanks for the complement, but that's nothin' I ever expected to come outta your mouth." I look at him a moment, seeing the grin on his face and looking into those damn eyes of his. "I'm not offerin' and I'm not makin' a pass at ya, but have you ever thought about it bein' your cock my ass is swallowing?"

"Yeah."

"Really?"

"Yeah, I have. And I'm not offerin' or makin' a pass, but I'd fuck you in a New York minute. I've never wanted to fuck a dude before, but I'd fuck that sweet ass of yours in a heartbeat."

I just look at him, not really believing he just said that, but also getting a little turned on at the idea of it. "I don't know what to say to that..."

He smiles. "Don't say anything; just know I'm tellin' you the God's honest truth. I'd also like to do that thing Josh does; eatin' your ass. I bet it tastes fuckin' sweet. And I always eat what I'm about to fuck." He grins.

I leer at him. "Is your cock hard?"

He grins. "Fuck yeah. Why, you offerin' that sweet ass? I thought you said you'd never cheat on Josh."

"I wouldn't; I was just wonderin', `cause mine is."

He smiles big. "Really?"

"Yeah, really; really, really hard."

He laughs. "You're havin' wet dreams about me again, huh?"

I blush and grin. "Yeah...."

He smiles at me again. "You know what it's like in those rooms, and I heard what Josh told you about doin' me. I know he said he was okay with it. I also know you'd feel guilty as fuck if you ever did anything with me. Just know that I'm honored that you feel that way about me, and I think sex with you would be some of the best sex I've ever had. And I'm not sayin' let's go do it, but I am sayin' that if you ever get to the point that you're sure you wouldn't be wracked with guilt, I'm willin' to do this when you are."

I just look at him. "Goddamn you; you tell me everything I've wanted to hear from you for six fuckin' months, and you say it in that fuckin' southern boy voice, and I'm supposed to just think about how guilty I'd feel for doin' something I've wanted for so long. It's not fair."

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to upset ya, I was just tellin' ya I'd do it. I'm sorry I waited so long to tell ya; I didn't know before now. I knew you wanted to kiss me, but I didn't know you wanted more; I didn't know I'd want more. I'm really sorry, Joe."

I shake my head a little. "Please don't be sorry. I didn't mean to make you feel bad about this, it's just I realized that all the fantasies I've had about you were obtainable, and it made me frustrated that my guilt is the only thing stopping me. My love for Josh and our relationship should be what stops me, not the guilt I'd feel."

"I understand, Joe. Let me ask you something. Did you feel guilty about the kiss?"

"No, not at all; I've wanted to kiss you for so long and so badly that I felt no guilt about it."

He smiles. "Thank you. OK, so let me ask this. How do you know you'd feel so guilty about doing something else?"

"I don't know for sure, but I know me. Even though he said it was okay, I know I would feel like I was cheating on him; betraying him. Betraying everything I've ever said to him; how much I love him."

"OK, I see that; I would feel like I betrayed him too. He is my friend; one of my two best friends. So, how about we do something with all three of us? If he's there and it's not just the two of us then everybody's happy and nobody's guilty."

I grin. "Now you're suggestin' a three-way with two guys? Are you sure you're not coming over to the dark side?"

He giggles, and it's fucking cute too; I've never heard him really giggle before. "Yeah, that's what I'm suggestin'. And no, I'm not comin' over to the dark side; I just wanna try visiting it. It solves the problem of the guilt and it allows you to have your fantasies. It also sounds really hot. Like I just told ya; you and Josh havin' sex together is fuckin' hot, why wouldn't I wanna try bein' the boy in the middle?"

I smile. "And here I was thinkin' I'm the one that always comes up with the good ideas." I look around us to make sure we're alone. I lean over and give him a quick kiss. "Thank you. I knew you were every bit as sweet and sexy as I always thought you were; and now smart too."

He blushes and grins. "Fucker... I've always been smart, you've just been thinkin' with your cock. And if you keep kissin' me people are gonna start talkin'." He grins.

"Do you care?"

"No; fuck `em. They wouldn't dare say anything to me anyway. I like your kisses; it shows me how much I mean to ya. And just to clear somethin' up; I've never been sweet." He grins.

"Oh yes you are. You may not let other people see it, but you've let me see it countless times. Don't worry, I'm not tellin'."

"You'd better not; I have a reputation to maintain."

I giggle. "You're OK lettin' them see ya kiss a guy, but not losin' the rep, huh?"

He grins. "Pretty much. Hasn't anyone ever told ya, rep is everything?"

"I've heard it a few times. And I don't mean to embarrass ya or nothin', but you are very sweet and incredibly sexy, Matt."

"Ah shucks." He giggles again and I laugh.

I look into his eyes, getting a little lost again. I shake my head to break the thoughts. He grins at me. "Don't fall in love with me, Joey; I can't give you everything you want. I'll gladly give you what I can, but I can't give you everything you want and need. Besides, you have a cute red head that is desperately in love with you, and you with him. Please don't fall in love with me."

I nod my head yes. "I know... I just get lost in your eyes sometimes; I did it again. I'll be good."

He smiles. "My eyes too, huh? Damn, boy, you just want all of me, huh?"

"I like everything about you; I always have."

"If I could find a fuckin' girl that loves me like you do I'd be the luckiest fuckin' dude on the planet. You almost make me wanna be gay, Joey. I know I've never actually said the words, but you know I love you, right? Not in love, but I do love you."

"I know. I love you too. Thank you for sayin' it though; you know a girl likes to hear these things." I grin at him and he smirks and grins.

"Dirty bitch."

"You wish."

"I do. So let's go find your boy and tell him our idea for a new way to rock his world."

I grin. "You got it."

 

Thanks,

Jeff raudiv8q@aim.com