Date: Thu, 18 Apr 2002 15:14:05 -0400 From: Rory M Subject: A Family chapter 1 A Family By Rory M Chapter 1 >From the View Point of Noah Elliot "Ewwww.....what's that?" "Flounder, and it's for dinner. I don't think it likes you poking it in the eye very much, Add," Liam was throwing green beans into a saute pan. He was amused by the fascination of the 8-year old. "Umm, I'm not eating that." "Yes you are, young man." I had Ava under my right arm as I walked into the kitchen, she was giggling wildly as I spun her around in a mock airplane. "But Dad..." "But nothing. At least try it for me Aidan. You're so used to the crap your mother feeds you I'm surprised you're not pudgy." "Ahhemmm..." Liam gave me a look from across the kitchen that told me he didn't approve. He was right, I shouldn't bad mouth their mother in front of them, but she's just as guilty with twice as much time...I might as well balance it out. Just then the phone rang, "Hello?" "Noah, I need to talk to you about something," here we go... "What's wrong, Maren?" "Nothing, I just need to ask if I can have the kids on the weekend of the 16th.There is an exhibition at the natural history museum for kids and I wanted to take them with my sister's kids." "Can't do, can it be another?" "No?" I got distracted. "Aidan...Add if you don't leave her alone I'm going to box your ears!" "If you touch my son I'll have your visitation revoked," Maren spit off across the receiver into my ear. She's still pretty scary when not in person. "He's my son still, you know. And he's chasing Ava around with the uncooked fish that we were going to have for dinner." "Put him on the phone." "Add, your mom," I handed the phone to my mischievous 8-year old who had stopped dead in his tracks as soon as I mentioned who it was on the phone. If anything, she was the disciplinarian. I guess I never had the true heart to be stern for that long. "Uh huh, Mom. No, Mom. But Mom?? No. OK, I'm sorry, but she was. Fine. Yeah, he's right here. Ok, see you later. Yeah, love you too. Bye," he almost threw the phone into my face as he stomped off. I always seem to be the bad guy lately. I picked up my phone conversation, didn't want to keep the lady waiting, after all. "Anyway, I can't let you have that weekend. I'm going up to see my parents with the kids and Liam for my father's birthday." "I don't ask that much of you, you know. You could at least grant me this much with all you've done," she was getting hostile with me. "I haven't DONE anything. And don't start with me on this. It kills me that I only get weekends and now you're asking me to give up that. I'm sorry, but I'll give you the one before or the one after. I told you about that trip over a month ago, I don't know why you're making such a big deal out of it now." "The next time you and your boy-toy want a kinky fling down the shore you can take the kids along, because I'm not helping your good for nothing ass anymore." "Is that really necessary, Maren? Listen, I'll see you on Sunday when I drop off the kids. If you want to talk later in more civilized tones, call me." I hung up; there was no point in reasoning. She went behind a wall in arguments like that. She had been that way since the divorce and when she found out about Liam. She's been very bitter, to say the least, since I came out. She still doesn't understand that I did it for her. "That sounded pleasant," Liam came up behind me and gave me a hug. He always knows when I need the affection. "Same old'. I wish she would take the stick out of her ass that's taking out her vision. Anyway, when is dinner?" the kids were starting to get restless, meaning that they were hungry. I can't blame them; they only get good food when they're with us over the weekends. Aidan sat at the kitchen counter trying to pop the eye out of the flounder, which he had been recently playing with. Ava was flipping through the channels as she lay in a weird half knot on the floor, as Avery, her twin, lay on the couch. The twins just started kindergarten, which can be relieving but it is a sad realization. Throughout the divorce and all the bitterness of the past two years, I somehow missed them go from diapers to school. That age somehow escaped me, and I curse myself for it. I divorced their mother when they were almost three. I just couldn't lie to her or myself anymore. Maren and I had drifted apart since they were born, even starting before then. I thought I'd get over my feelings for men, but when I got to my 30's I couldn't and there was no use hurting my family anymore. So, here we are today- shared custody, bitter court battles and probably my hairline has all been dealt with, and I think things are getting better. Liam has been a big help. I've been with him for 2 years and we moved into this town house together 6 months ago. Four bedrooms in this area are hard to come by, so we jumped on the chance. The kids love it here, and they're getting used to the idea of Liam. At first, Aidan wasn't sure what to make of it, but he's come around. The twins have been too young, which maybe is a blessing. They won't remember the bitterness, hopefully. Liam is another person to dote over them, so in their eyes he's another dad, thank god. "It'll be ready as soon as I rinse off that fish and cook it. About half an hour?" "Sounds good, babe," I gave his adorable face a small peck as I went over to the couch and he to the kitchen. I didn't realize it before, but Avery was out cold. It was strange to me, because he very rarely takes naps at all, and especially not at this time of the day. I sat next to his curled up frame on the couch and felt his forehead. Damn it. He was burning up. The last thing I wanted this weekend was a sick kid. "Ave, get up sweetie," I nudged him and rubbed his back. He grunted and curled back up into his ball. "Just leave him alone, dad. He's been sleeping like that for a few weeks now." "Add, I think he's sick. Did your mom know he was?" "He was better yesterday, mom sent him to school all week and everything." "You know, when I call her I want to know what's going on, not the weather across town." "Daddy...it was no big deal," Aiden turned back into the kitchen to help Liam with dinner, which was a routine for Friday nights for the two. "Alright, come on Ave, to the bathroom," I hoisted him up and carried him to the bathroom. None of my kids are functioning when they wake up. Like me, they can barely say their own names, let alone walk. I sat him on the counter while I searched in the medicine cabinet for the thermometer. His crystalline green eyes followed my movements as I looked for and then found the thermometer. Avery let out a big sigh of annoyance and opened his mouth for the intrusion. "What a pro!" I mocked him as I frazzled his jet-black hair. He and Ava shared those two traits at least. Besides the hair and eyes they were completely different in everything. As I waited for the thermometer to beep I noticed the bruises on his shins and one on his neck that was very faint. My gut reaction at that moment was to hall Aidan's ass into the bathroom at the second and scold him for beating up on his little brother, but then common sense took over, and I decided to ask Avery himself. After the beep, of course. "Where did you get all of these bruises, Ave?" I asked him softly as I took the thermometer out of his mouth to read it. Damn, 100.3. Why, oh why, couldn't he be sick with his mother? "I don't know, Daddy. They've been there." "Did Add hit you?" "No, not hard. He's not so strong. He's a big sissy, like mom says you and Lee are," he never can pronounce Liam, so his adaptation has been Lee. It's pretty cute. "Umm...ok. It's not nice of your mommy to call us names, you know that, right?" "Yeah, but you call her all sorts of names too, and some of them I can't even say," he did have a point. I took notice of how pale he was, and how he looked a little thinner. I recalled Maren saying that he didn't have much of an appetite lately when I picked them up. I'm surprised she didn't tell me, and more importantly take him to a doctor. "You hungry at all, kiddo?" he shook his head no and yawned. I guess it was an early bedtime, "Why don't we go and get you comfy, I don't think you're going mini-golfing tonight. You wanna watch a video?" "I wanted to go golfing!!" his face contorted into a tired scowl and his voice already started to catch with the oncoming tears. "Me and you will hang out tonight and do whatever you want, ok? Why don't we rent Willy Wonka?" He sniffled out his acceptance of the bargain and held out his arms to be picked up off the counter top. Liam took the other two munchkins mini-golfing that night (what a saint) while I hung out with Ave. He's my quietest one, it's a shame I don't see him so much. ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~ "How long has he felt this way?" "Maybe a week or two, it hasn't been that bad. I think he just doesn't like school, he never seems to want to go, and he gets really tempered with the kids there. I don't think he's really sick." "Maren, he was running a fever and wouldn't eat all weekend. I made an appointment for tomorrow to go see Dr. Phillips." "The kids have school and I have work tomorrow, how am I supposed to take him! You think you can make those kinds of commitments without me? Why don't you think, Noah? Why don't you think?" "First of all, I'm on call tomorrow, so I'm taking him. Now I can either take him home with me or pick him up in the morning, I'd rather take him home, but god forbid I violate the custody agreement for a night." "I'll get him some clothes, but I want him home tomorrow night. This weekday stuff won't work." "Maren, can you have a mellow conversation with me once? Why are you always on such a defensive?" "I gave you want you wanted, didn't I? Don't push it," she barked, I backed away. "Come on kiddo, we're going back to see Lee, ok?" the five-year olds face brightened up as I lifted him into the front seat, where he rarely got to sit. Maren cut me off from seat belting him into my explorer, pushing me into the door as if I wasn't even there." "Now you be good tonight, ok? If you want me for anything you know the number, can you say it for me?" Avery spouted out the number with pride of the knowledge, "Ok, I'll see you later baby, feel better." I said my goodbyes to Aidan and Ava and made the 10-minute drive back to the house that we shared. That evening Avery only ate a little bit of mashed potatoes from his dinner plate. 'My only good eater has quit on me,' I thought, taking the almost full serving away from him. That evening the three of us snuggled up on the couch to watch a Disney movie. Avery was again running a fever, but it didn't take him long to fall asleep. I was really starting to get worried about him. For once I wished for what Maren said to be true, but I just had a gut feeling something was wrong. That night Ave slept with up in our king bed. Usually he would creep in because of a bad dream or he was scared of something or other. After he falls asleep I would carry him back to his own bed, but not that night. I didn't want to disturb him, and I didn't want him to be that far from either Liam or me when he was ill. He curled into my side and was quickly asleep. "Do you think he's ok?" Liam asked looking at me from his pillow. His hand was rubbing gently through the boy's hair as he drifted off to sleep. "I hope so, it's just a bug or something," I leaned across the bed and gave him a goodnight kiss. "I'll wake you at 8?" "Sounds good, what time are you off?" "No long term stories tomorrow, I should be out by four unless something breaking comes up, which I doubt. Give me a call after the doc's though, ok?" Liam was an assistant coordinator at the local channel-six news station. At 29 years old he made more in one year than both his parents did together in ten, which had caused some resentment. "I will. But I'm sure it's nothing, really." "Alright, just let me know." "G'night, babe." "Night." ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~ "Come on Ave, get up." "NO!!! I don't want to go, I want to go back to mommies!" What a wonderful morning. I picked him up and carried him to the bathroom to brush his teeth and get ready. Liam was just finishing up when I carried the irritable 5-year old into the bathroom. "Good mor...Jesus honey he's bleeding all over!!" Liam ran across the bathroom with some toilet paper to gauge Avery's bloody nose. I hadn't noticed because his head was on my shoulder, preventing me from seeing the blood running down his face into his mouth, making him cry all the more. "Shhh, it's alright Ave, calm down," he turned to me with concern in his eyes, "I don't remember him ever getting nose bleeds, do you?" "No, but maybe his sinuses are dried out. I'm going to take him in a little early." "Should I call out and go with you?" "No, Babe. I'll be fine. I'll call you the moment we're done, ok?" "Alright. Just ask for blood work and the whole bit, ok?" "I will, I will. You're worse than his mother with this worrying stuff," I kissed him as he scowled, "Come on Ave, let me see it." I took the balled up toilet paper away from his face gently. His nose wasn't bleeding, but there was drying blood everywhere. "You look like a vampire, kiddo. Hey, look at your daddy's neck, it looks like you left bite marks," Ave giggled a little as I started to wash his face with a clean towel. Within 45 minutes we were off to the doctors as Liam was to the studios. Avery only managed to eat toast for breakfast before almost falling asleep again in front of cartoon reruns. I was getting worried and anxious. I didn't let on, but the nosebleed scared me. I must admit I sped a little to the doctor's. ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~ "Hey hot shot! Why don't you jump up on the scale for me," Dr. Phillips was a good pediatrician, especially with the temperamental twins. Ava hated everything to do with the place and Avery followed suit. Aidan wasn't so bad until it came to shots, then there was trouble, but the doc had a real gift with them. Avery tentatively stood on the scale and took his vitals as I told him his symptoms. The doctor looked concerned as I plopped Avery up on the exam table. It didn't sit well with me, I knew the man well enough to know that there was serious concern. At that moment I requested the blood work Liam was so adamant about. "I was planning on that at the end of the examination, but first can you lay back for me kiddo? I want to feel your belly," he pressed around his upper stomach, eliciting a wince and a whine from Avery. I also wasn't feeling so good, "Are you tired a lot, Avery?" he nodded. The rest of the exam went on with poking and prodding and then the dreaded blood test. It's hard doing it by yourself. Having to hold him down is hard without Maren holding his hand, I admit. "I'm gonna send this downstairs and get a rush on it. It'll take a little over half an hour if you can wait." "Sure. I'm just going to take him for some air and we'll be back. Thanks Doc." For the next half hour I walked with Avery around the building which Dr. Phillips' office was. It was a warm Monday, and the streets were mildly crowded with Philadelphia's morning traffic. His legs were tired so I carried him on my shoulders for a lot of the way. The sun seemed to cheer him up and he forgot about the blood work that just went on only a few minutes before. All too soon, however, it was time to get back into the office. There was another parent and her son in the waiting room. The kid obviously had a bad cold of some sorts, so I took Avery across the room. The receptionist soon asked us into the same examination room we had been in. It seemed like we had been waiting in there forever. I was getting irritated with the hold up. It had been 20 minutes and I hadn't seen the doctor or seen a single test result. Ave had busied himself in counting my keys and playing with the contents of my wallet as he lay on the exam table. After probably a half hour the door opened, but it was not was I expected. Maren came rushing into the room, frantic to see if Avery was ok. Following with a folder in his hand was Dr. Phillips. "I'm sorry for the hold up Mr. Trent, but I thought it would be best if both of you were here, so I called Maren. There is no way for me to prepare you for what these results say, but you'll have to act immediately. What I've concluded is that Avery has a type of cancer called Leukemia." "What? What do you mean cancer? He's only 5!!" Maren's grip on Avery was getting tighter as she became frantic." "Ma'am, please calm down. I need you and your husband to understand what I've just told you." "Ex-husband!" I couldn't think. My mind was spinning and I felt as if I was going to lose my breakfast right there or pass out. 'Cancer? My baby?' kept running over and over again in my mind. I must have stayed in that state for a few moments before the doctor snapped me back to attention. "Noah are you ok, do you need a seat?" I gladly accepted. "Now I need you both to calm down. I know the word 'cancer' is the scariest word any parent thinks about, but Leukemia is one of the most curable kinds of cancer there are. Not saying that it's easy to cure, but he has a good survival rate. He will need to start chemotherapy, hopefully today, and have more tests done to find out what kind of Leukemia we're dealing with. What this little guy needs now is to get over to CHOP (Children's Hospital of Philadelphia) and start his treatments. I've already called the oncology staff and faxed over his blood work results, but I ask you now to please take him over there. I know this is a lot at once and it's very fast, but is there anything you want to know?" It was too fast for me, I couldn't say a word. All I could think about is losing Avery. God I barely knew him besides weekends and when he was a baby, I wanted so much more. Why this now? Why am I not the one going into such an experience? I zoned out as I reached for Avery's hand. Maren was asking many questions, but I didn't hear any of them, I just wanted to touch him. I scooped him out of his mother's death grip and hoisted him up against my chest. He was confused and upset; he obviously didn't know what was going on around him. "I can't drive now, can you take me with you, I'll hold him?" "Huh? Oh, yeah sure." I called Liam on my cell in the parking lot and asked him to pick Ava and Aidan up from school and gave him a briefing. I could hear him start to choke up over the line, but I couldn't deal with that right now, I had to get Avery registered into the hospital for the no doubt nightmare that was about to come. ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~ Any comments or questions can be sent to St_Rory@hotmail.com or IM me at Rory Danial.