Grandma and I were preparing to move to the castle, when she commented, "You know, I think that you will be bored, being all alone in San Salva, this summer."
"I don't think so! You are with me."
"Flatterer! I am but an old woman, and you a boy."
"Firstly, you are not an old woman. Secondly, I am not a boy!"
"At seventy three? When will I become old, then?"
"Never! And I am not much more than a boy, I am only twenty-one."
Grandma smiled and looked at me with love filled eyes: "Anyway, I decided to invite Edoardo De Turris, to keep you company!"
"The De Turris family? Grandma!"
"No, not all the De Turrises. Just Edoardo."
"But he is a kid!"
"He is eighteen and finished high school this year. Moreover, he is a dear boy who is quiet and good-hearted. I think he has a great admiration for you and it will do him good to have a summer far away from his family. Poor thing!"
"But grandma! Will I have to baby sit him? I would be better off on my own."
"Massimiliano! Anyway, it is too late! I thought to please you... You will miss Margherita so, you will think of her less with Edoardo around. I have already invited him. I phoned only this morning."
"And he accepted and his parents agreed, I presume."
"Certainly, he willingly accepted and his parents agreed without reserve!"
Immediately upon our arrival at the castle, grandma had the spare room on my floor emptied, cleaned, and set up as Edoardo's bedroom.
"I thought that he might be lonely, all alone in the guest wing, so you will be near, and he can be more independent. He can go to bed or get up without depending on me or being disturbed by the staff. Treat him well, I am asking this as a personal favour."
"All right, grandma. But remember, I will do this just for you!"
She gave me a kiss on my forehead, and continued to direct the work for the new setting of the room. For a moment I thought I would have preferred to have Paolo or Margherita in the room near mine. But I at once chased away that thought. I would have preferred just Margherita. However, grandma would never have allowed her to sleep in a room so close to mine! Both of us, alone, secluded up there. Never mind! I resigned myself and hoped that the boy would not be too much of a burden.
So, Edoardo arrived at the castle. The family chauffeur brought him. The last time I saw him he was sixteen. Then he seemed to think that he was more adult than he actually was, thin and tall, a little ungraceful, with a hint of hair on his upper lip... how had he changed! Now he was almost nineteen, no more a kid, he had developed a lot. It might have been that his clothes contributed to making him look more mature, more adult. Grandma and I met him at the main entrance. The first thing I noticed, while he was getting out of the car was that he still had an extremely shy air about him. The second thing I noticed, was his green, golden eyes, luminous and really beautiful.
"Duchess... Massimiliano... I am so glad to be your guest..."
"Welcome, Edoardo. It is we who are happy to have you as our guest. Come." grandma said,
She placed her arm inside his and guided him to the castle, while the servants helped the chauffeur to unload the luggage and transfer up to the already prepared room. The boy's clothes were elegant but, in some way, rather neutral. I was sure they had been chosen by his mother. While I followed them inside the castle, I could just make out his straight and elegant gait, and the nape of his neck, with brown hair well cut and perfectly shaped. His clothes hid his figure and could only guess that he was well proportioned and lean. He could however, be too thin or somewhat plump, it was impossible to say. We sat in the Chinese lounge on the ground floor. Felicia served us tea and grandma asked Edoardo news about his family. The boy answered with politely, without being lengthy or too concise.
I studied him. When he smiled - he had a nice smile - the corners of his mouth were slightly bent upwards and his eyes were slightly closed, he was attractive. He had a fine, straight, and well-shaped nose. His hair was light and he had a large forelock, carefully combed, which barely covered his ears that were perfect. I remember thinking that his ears were more beautiful than those of Margherita, and yet my girlfriend's ears were the most beautiful I had ever seen, up to then. I looked at his hands - violinist's hands, tapered, cared for and beautiful. The little of him that was visible, was more than agreeable as was his voice.
"... will take you for some nice rides on our horses, right, Massimiliano?"
"Eh? Ah, yes, certainly. Do you like to ride?"
"Yes, but... I would not bother you..."
Grandma stood up, Edoardo did immediately the same.
"No, no, sit down. I'll leave you two alone for a while, you youths will get to know each other far quicker without my presence. See you for supper. Massimiliano, you will show him his room and help him to settle, won't you? See you later, my dear boys." She left the room.
Edoardo gave a short bow (perfect, I thought) then turned towards me.
"Sit down, Edoardo. Later I will show you to your room."
"Thank you, Massimiliano." he said and sat.
I felt he was a little tense, ill at ease. He was not at all dislikeable. On the contrary, I remember thinking that I had simply shouldn't put him in the same horsebox as his parents and treat him fairly.
"Call me Max, if we are to be friends."
"Very well, as you like."
"So, you just got your high school diploma, right?" I said, almost to underline that he was younger than me, and so affirm my authority.
"Yes. You are in the third year, aren't you?"
"Political Science, yes. What are you thinking of doing, after?"
"University. My father decided I must study Business Administration."
"How you say it sounds as though you don't like the idea very much."
"He decided. He wants me to prepare to take his side in his industry management business."
"What would you have liked to study, instead?"
"I? It doesn't matter, Business Administration is all right."
"Yes, but if it was up to you to make the choice?"
"Architecture."
"You would like to become an architect? That's interesting."
"Not really, more an interior designer. But my road is different."
"But, did you discuss this with him?"
Edoardo's eyes for an instant stared at mine, shone, then he looked away: "All but that! To go against the wishes of my father!"
"Is he so... terrible?"
"No, well, he is very... resolute in what he wants."
"I see. I think I... I think I am really lucky to have been brought up by my grandmother..."
"She is an exceptional woman, the duchess. I have always admired her, very much."
I nodded. The simple fact he had good thoughts of grandma and that his eyes shone while he was speaking, made me start to really like him.
"May I be honest with you, Edoardo?"
He nodded seriously and said: "If we have to... become friends, we need to be sincere with each other, don't we?"
"Well, it is not said we HAVE to become friends, but we can."
"I really wanted to underline the word friends..."
"Ah, very good. When grandma said to me that you were coming to spend the summer here with us, I was not too happy. I remembered you as a little boy and... well, I don't feel a boy any more do you see? But now that I'm getting to know you, I think I would be happy if we could become friends."
"I hope you will be happy... But I have never felt like a little boy, or just a boy for that matter. I would have liked, but it did not happen."
I frowned: "You were never a boy? What do you mean?"
"Well, you see... I never stole the jam, I never played war games or hide and seek, or... do you see?"
"Never? You never shot a sling?"
"No, at home or in the garden, one is not allowed."
"Never made a kite fly?"
"No."
"Never grazed your knees falling on your roller skates?"
"I never had roller skates, too dangerous."
"Never rolled on a lawn fighting with other boys?"
"No..."
"But at school, with your mates..."
"A Swiss boarding school, worse than barracks."
"Grandma always made me go to public schools."
"Also the high school?" Edoardo asked, widening his eyes.
"Sure. My mother sent me to a boarding school. But from the fourth year of primary school onwards, that is when I started to live with grandma, she at once sent me to public schools."
"Lucky you!"
"I never thought it was... That is, I studied there, and that's it. But probably yes, I have been lucky. How did you play then?"
"The only one allowed game, beside sports, was chess."
"Nothing more? And didn't you become insane?"
Edoardo again raised his head and looked at me with those luminous eyes: "No, I don't think so. I lived in a world of fantasy, here, inside me, where I took refuge and could feel free. A world only mine, where my father and my mother, and the teachers, and all the others, could not enter... could not control me. A world were my mother could not open my mail or rummage through my drawers and throw away my things she judged stupid..."
"You mean that..."
"Once I found a stone, that had stripes of various colours and shone. It was so beautiful..."
"And your mother threw it away?"
"Yes, it was just a stone."
"Why didn't you hide it?"
"I did but she always managed to find my hiding places."
"Oh God! That's terrible!"
"No, it is... it is just so."
"I always knew that your parents are..." I passionately started, but stopped, biting my tongue.
He had a sad smile and shook his head: "They are convinced they are doing good."
"And what about your sister and brother?"
"For the little I could, I tried to help them. Soon I discovered that the best way to help was to persuade them to accept..."
I was so shocked at hearing all this that I was at loss for words. I just felt I had a knot in my throat.
In the end I burst out: "Don't you hate them for what they have done... are doing to you?"
He shook his head, smiling again: "No. Hate doesn't help to solve problems. They are not bad, after all. They never beat us. One cannot judge them too harshly... they are my parents, after all."
Right, one has not to judge, but...
"Listen, Edoardo. For two months you can be your true self. You can... you'll see, we will amuse ourselves."
"This is the first time I am... I can have a vacation alone. It still seems impossible! I owe this to your grand mother..."
I accompanied him to the tower, to his room. His luggage was already there. I helped him to put his things in the closets and in the drawers as we continued to talk.
"Would you like to take a bath, before supper?"
"Willingly."
I showed him the bathroom and told him I would wait in my room. Sitting near the window, I thought about what Edoardo told me. That boy made me feel incredible tenderness towards him. What an absurd life he had been through! I had to make those two months a true vacation for him, an unforgettable period, an oasis in such a squalor. I could hear the bathroom water flowing. Yes, I would amuse him, play, do what he felt he would like, take his fill. When I helped him to put away his belongings, I noticed he had just formal clothing (but of a little sad elegance) and nothing like a T-shirt or jeans. He was a little smaller than myself, but not too much. I would have to lend him some of mine, possibly the clothes that were a little tight for me, so that he could... how do you say... sit on the ground or climb a tree, or roll on the grass without any problems. I also decided that the following day I would take him riding and show him the surroundings. Even better, I could organize a picnic for lunch, make a fire to cook our food, and take him at the brook to bathe and wallow...
I heard the water in the bathroom was no more flowing, then the door opening. I went out of my room just as Edoardo was entering his own. He was wearing a long, white bathrobe.
"Edoardo, what about going for a ride tomorrow, eating in the wood, and..."
He turned towards me. His bathrobe, tied at his waist, barely showed a narrow triangle on his smooth and hairless chest.
"Yes, that would be wonderful! Will your grandmother agree?"
"Sure, why shouldn't she?"
"How have I to dress, for supper?"
"As you like. Not in a formal way, though. We still have an hour..."
"Do you change your clothes?"
"Yes."
"What will you wear?"
"I don't know, I haven't thought about it yet. I will see."
"May I see what you decide to wear, so I too can choose something equally suitable?"
"Sure, come."
We went into my room where I opened the closet, rapidly chose some clothes and lay them out on my bed.
"Here. I'd rather change now, so I'll be ready for supper."
"Good, thank you. I must dress, too."
He left my room as I continued to change my clothes. I was arranging myself in front of the mirror when he knocked at my door.
"Come in!"
He came and stopped at the door: "May I?"
"Come in! You are rather ceremonious! You can enter my room even without knocking."
"Well, you might... not be presentable."
"You mean naked? Who cares! We are two boys, I would not feel embarrassed with you!"
"I think I would be ashamed. I haven't even seen my little brother in his underwear."
"Really? In the gym or at the manege, I often had my shower with the others, it's just normal."
"Without anything on?"
I laughed, amused: "Everybody showers naked! At your boarding school, in Switzerland, didn't you shower naked?"
"Yes, of course. But we had private showers in our rooms, and we had to follow the rules. If we were not completely dressed, there could be no one there but the occupant."
"Then, you have never seen a naked man?"
"Beside myself... no, never."
"And... a girl?"
He blushed in a delicious way: "No, of course not."
"But... have you ever made love?"
"I? No; never!"
"You mean that at well over eighteen, all you did was... alone?"
He again blushed, this time to the tip of his ears, but nodded without looking at me. I shook my head, almost in disbelief. Then I looked at him, set his shirt collar under his jacket. The back of my hands brushed his neck and I felt a light shudder and the impulse to caress the nape of his neck, but I restrained myself, afraid that he may interpret my gesture wrongly. In fact, at that point, I felt tenderness, almost like an elder brother for his younger sibling, nothing more.
"A walk around the castle, before supper?" I proposed.
"Willingly."
We went downstairs and out of the castle. We talked some more as we wandered in the garden, until the dinner bell rang. We entered the dining room from the garden's patio and sat waiting for grandma. As she entered, Edoardo at once stood up and greeted her with his short bow.
"So then, my dears, did you break the ice?" she asked with a smile.
While eating we talked about various subjects. It was grandma that led the conversations.
When I told her that Edoardo would have liked to study architecture, but that his father decided to enrol him in Business Administration, she said: "Oh, what a pity! Don't you think you should tell your wish to your father?"
"No, no, he would never accept."
"I can talk to you mother. I will be happy to do so."
"No, thank you. My mother would never oppose my father and... even if she tried, she would get nowhere, and things would become worse, and... Believe me. I thank you, duchess. You are very kind, but to realize my dreams is not essential. Dreams are dreams, we have not to mistake them with real life."
"But dreams can also become reality. It depends on us." I exclaimed, feeling pain for Edoardo.
After supper, Edoardo apologized and retired to bed. I stayed to talk with grandma.
When she too decided to go to retire, she said: "Good night, Massimiliano. I am happy that you are taking Edoardo to heart. You can do him good by giving your friendship. But be careful, don't pit him against his family, you would just make him more unhappy, poor boy."
That night I had difficulty in sleeping, I was really concerned for him. The following morning he arrived in a horseman's attire. I barely held back my laughter.
Trying to remain serious, I said: "Edoardo, we are not going to ride at Vinovo or at Piazza di Siena! We are going to do an excursion of the woods. Come, I'll give you something more fitting."
I lent him a T-shirt and jeans. He went to change in his room. When he showed again, I nodded and ruffled his hair.
"What are you doing?" he asked me, amazed.
"So you look better, listen to me."
"But so I am uncombed!"
"No more than me! You look too serious, all waxed up. Not a hair out of place. We are in the country side here, aren't we?"
After breakfast I took two horses and, loaded the provisions in the saddle bags, then we cantered out the castle. Edoardo was a good rider. My T- shirt was soft on him, but for the first time I saw his bare arms. They were lightly muscled and I liked them. We rode and chatted at the same time. After a couple of hours we stopped near the brook, tied our horses to a tree and went down to the watercourse. We took off our shoes and sat on the bank, dangling our feet in the water.
"Do you like it here?"
"Wonderful. Do you know that this is the first time I have sat on the ground and soaked my feet? I feel so... free!"
"Let's take a bath!"
"A bath? Here?"
"Why not? There is nobody about and the sun is warm and... I often come here to bathe. At first the water feels cool, but then it is pleasurable."
"But... I don't have a swimming suit."
"Me neither. Normally I bathe naked."
"Naked?" he asked me, his eyes widened in surprise.
"Sure. Anyway nobody ever comes here."
"I... I would be ashamed."
"And then keep your underpants on. Come on, let's undress." I said standing up and pulling off my T-shirt.
Edoardo appeared to hesitate, but then sheepishly followed suit. I wanted to look at him, but I thought that it might embarrass him, so I refrained. Anyway, I mused that I would see him while we bathe. I was now wearing my underpants and, at this point, I hesitated.
"If you want, you can take them off! If you like...!" I heard Edoardo say.
He was watching at me! Without turning, I nodded and took off my last garment, and went to plunge in the brook. Then I turned. Edoardo was coming. He wore just white cotton underpants. The water came up to his knees. He sat down in the stream.
"Brrr! It is c... co... cold, but good!"
Beating the water with my hands, I splashed him and wet him all over. He laughed and started to slap the water towards me. We played for a while, splashing each other and laughing like fools. He was happy and excited. I stopped and looked at him. He was beautiful!
He noticed I was looking at him and he too stopped splashing me: "Why do you look at me... so?"
"Are you happy?"
"Yes, oh yes! Never even in my wildest dreams has anything happened to me like this, so... special, beautiful."
"And this is just your second day! You will see..."
Edoardo turned his head, like as if he was looking around. But I understood he didn't want me to see he was crying. I felt an incredible impulse to hold him tight in my arms, to cuddle him. And still, I assure you, Eugenio, I didn't feel for him but a great tenderness. That boy was bewitching me, he was conquering my heart.
We got out of the water and lay under the sun. We talked and talked. I turned my head towards him and caught his glance that was flowing all long my naked body.
When he became aware I was looking at him, he blushed like a little schoolboy caught in the act: "Sorry..." he murmured looking away.
"For what? At least now you can't say that you've never seen a naked man!"
"Doesn't it... annoy you?"
"No. I am not an exhibitionist, but I really believe I have nothing to be ashamed of. I am rather well shaped, don't you think?"
He didn't answer.
"Let's dress. Aren't you hungry? Shall we prepare dinner?"
"Yes, sure." he answered seriously, starting to dress at his turn.
A little later, Edoardo was again serene and laughing. He was fascinated to prepare the fire, to roast the meat and the potatoes on the embers, and he ate with pleasure, with his hands.
"If my parents could see me now!" he merrily exclaimed, licking his fingers.
After eating, and carefully extinguishing the embers, we mounted our horses and wandered around, keeping our horses at the pace. I started to clown around in my saddle. I knelt on it, lay down, sat backwards. He laughed and laughed. Then he tried, too!
At first he was hesitant, but when he succeeded in kneeling on his saddle, he shouted in excitement: "Look, look, I did it, I did it, too!" and laughed, merry and light-hearted just like a child.
The following day I took him out on the bicycles. At times we challenged each other as to which of us was the faster, at times we slowly pedalled side-by-side, chatting away. We stopped at the bar in the nearby village where we played on the pinball machine - I had played a couple of times, Edoardo never had, we were two hopeless players but we enjoyed ourselves.
On the third day we went on our horses again. And this time he asked me if we could go bathing.
"Have you brought your swimming trunks?" I asked.
He blushed (how often it happened to him, then!) and said: "No... I decided to go... like you."
And so, finally, I saw him naked. He was so beautiful (by the way he still is, or rather he his even more beautiful now). I remember that for a moment I thought that it was a pity we hadn't met before... But nowadays I have decided to never again do it with a man. Even if I would have liked, with him... I chased that thought away - it was the first time I thought of him lustfully, and I believe that just the chilling water of the brook avoided an embarrassing erection. I noticed that he had not yet completely overcome his embarrassment, but he was trying. The day passed pleasurably.
The following two or three days were really great! We were getting better more as the days passed, closer, more comfortable with each other. Grandma Liza noticed it, too, and that made her very happy.
We had now been together for a week. I taught him to make a catapult and a peashooter, we played leapfrog just like two kids. I too was amused and had a very good time in renewing those childhood games, and to teach and play them with him, and to see how much he enjoyed them.
One evening I entered the bathroom and Edoardo he was in the tub.
"Oh, sorry." I said withdrawing.
"Max? Max, come in! We already saw each other naked, haven't we?"
"Aren't you bothered?"
"No... that is, just a little. But I have to control myself. Two friends have not to be ashamed of each other, isn't that right?" he said shyly smiling to me. I went in.
"I just wanted to brush my teeth." I said, but sat on the tub edge.
The foam covered his body and just half of his chest and his knees were visible above the water line.
"Do you feel all right, Edoardo?"
"Yes, perfectly. I can stay, soaking in the tub, even for an hour, if I feel like! It's great!"
"No, I meant here, with us."
"Oh yes! I feel wonderful. I feel like dreaming. And you with me it's... it's exceptional. I would have loved to have you as an elder brother."
"And I, to have you as a younger brother!" I said ruffling his hair.
"Really?"
"Yes, very much. But it is also beautiful to be friends, isn't it?"
"Yes, and rather, a brother, you find him there, so. A friend, you choose. That's even better, don't you think?"
"You are right." I said.
Suddenly, I felt a terrible desire to kiss him, and not how you would kiss a brother or a friend. So I stood up and went to brush my teeth. He also stood up and, while he was emptying the tub, he rinsed with the shower nozzle. Through the mirror I looked at him and sharply felt a desire for him. I looked away and tried to think of Margherita. I finished brushing my teeth and went back to my room. I had just finished undressing and was putting on my dressing gown, when Edoardo came in. He was wearing his long bathrobe.
"What will we do, tomorrow?" he asked with the air of an excited child who is about to open his Christmas presents.
"Surprise! Now it is time to hit the sack!."
"Already? Don't you feel like talking a while?"
"Yes, sure. Why not?"
We chatted for about an hour, I sitting on my bed and he on a chair.
Then I got an idea: "Edoardo, let's go to the kitchen to steal some jam!"
"What?"
"Yes, we can stuff ourselves with bread and jam, and then we can put everything in disorder, so tomorrow we will hear the reaction of the Gina!"
"But if they catch us, they will think we are mad."
"And we will do so that they don't catch us!"
"All right, I am game!"
I rummaged in my drawer and found the torch. I raised my finger vertically across my lips, gesturing him not to make any noise, I switched off the bedroom light and, by the beam of the torch, we went downstairs, bare feet, to the kitchen.
You will not believe me, Eugenio, but my heart was pounding like when I did some prank as a child. We prepared two sandwiches with butter and jam, and while eating them, we started to change the places of the pans, plates, everything! From time to time I looked at Edoardo and saw that he was really amused. Suddenly a fry pan slipped out of his hand and fell down onto the stone floor, resounding like a gong. I looked at him, he had a lost air. I switched off the torch and whispered him to keep silent. After a while I felt his hand on my arm and his body brush mine. He was trembling. And I got aroused and if we were not in the dark, I think it would have been clearly visible. I felt it pushing against the silk of my gown, erect, hard, impudent. And Edoardo was almost leaning against my body.
"Can they have heard us?" he barely whispered, after a while.
"I don't think so. I hear nothing."
"Perhaps it is better if we go upstairs..."
"Yes, let's go." I said. I switched on the torch and led the way.
We went up the tower and back to my room. I switched on the light and we sat on my bed and burst into laughter. Happily my erection had subsided.
"Clean yourself, you have a smear of jam on your lip." I said. He wiped it off and we laughed some more.
"You are incredible, Max. Do you know that you made me really feel like an... an eight-year-old urchin?"
"I felt so, too Edoardo! If you only knew how fast my heart was pumping!"
"You too? Mine was beating so strongly that I'm sure it could be heard all over the castle. And tomorrow, what will Gina say?"
"Please, just remain serious. We don't know anything about it."
"We can swear on that, we are two good boys! I really hope I can remain straight-faced!"
We could. But at a certain point we had to leave the vicinity, because it was becoming too difficult to remain serious.
It was when grandma said to Gina: "Come on, Gina! There are no more children in this castle, and never there have been ghosts. Who do you think moved the things in the kitchen?"
At that the poor Gina left the room muttering to herself: "And yet things in the kitchen are no more in the place I put them..."
As soon as we were behind the stables, we embraced and we burst our sides in laughing.