Date: Fri, 25 Dec 2015 22:52:53 -0500 From: Randy Wade Subject: Hazard prolog chapter 1 This story is fictional though some events and places maybe be real the characters and events surrounding them are completely fictional. The idea for this story came loosely from the song hazard by Richard Marx The normal copy rights for this story are held by me any copying without authorization from this writer is not allowed. This story contains graphic sexual content between males. If you are not legal whether by age or place of residence do so at your own risk. Please feel free to contact me at RandyWadeStory@gmail.com Please donate to this site. HAZARD Prolog Most people have happy memories mixed with bad ones. Not me. Imagine yourself in a burning room with no escape. The only thing you have to look forward to is your last breath. That's my life. I am not being melodramatic or emo. In all honesty even my good memories are darkened and burned. They few and rare. They were always clouded by sadness and cruelty. I am not looking for sympathy or anything like that. I am just doing what I was told to do by my therapist. Tell my story by writing it down. It's supposed to help me deal with where I am. Now where I am is hell. I won't tell you where right now. I have been here for 9 months and have a lot more to go. In all truths I really no longer care. I am just surviving life in despite of it. Here is a little insight about me before I tell my story. My name is Noah Mac Daniels. I am 20 years old, dark brown hair with green eyes. I am exactly 6 feet tall. I have a great build, I have been working out since I was 15. Oh yeah and I am gay. I am not bragging but I am a good looking guy. That's what I am told not what I feel. I honestly feel ugly. I told my therapist that but she says that's what I feel about myself inside. I no longer bother telling people that I don't belong here. They don't believe me so I don't waste my breath I just survive and do what I am told. IF I get through a day without being beaten into a bloody mess I consider that a good day. So that being said what you're going to read is my life as I remember it. The bad, the ugly, and the hurt. Yeah it hurts. I'd say happy reading but you know nothing happy about this. Unless you're the sadistic type that get off on this type of shit. HAZARD CHAPTER 1 The drive to Hazard, Kentucky was took around three hours but to me seemed shorter. Joe tried talking to me but I barely replied and when I did it was one or two words. I felt as if I was being abandoned and thrown away again. I knew deep down that Joe couldn't keep me. I knew he wanted too. Unfortunately child serves had other plans. Even knowing this it didn't change that feeling. We drove through the town, before I knew it we were in the woods. Joe pulled onto a gravel road and continued down about a half mile. The trees gave way to an open area in the middle was an old one and half story farm house. It was well kept with wood siding and shutters on the windows. The only thing wrong was that it needed some paint but to me everything was wrong. Joe wouldn't be there. I was going to be with people I never met. I felt the tears well up in my eyes. As the trucked stopped in front of the house an older couple stepped out on the porch. I felt the tears about to come but willed them away as best I could. I did not cry. Men do not cry my mom would say when I did. That was usually accompanied by a smack. Joe got out of the truck and talked to the older people I knew were my grandparents. They would glance at me sitting in the front seat where I remained. I didn't want to get out. I didn't want to stay I wanted to stay with Joe. He was my family. Joe came back to the truck and opened the passenger door. "Time to meet your grandparents Noah." I just looked at Joe and shook my head. I wasn't ready I would never be ready. I felt if I met them Joe would disappear forever from my life. I didn't want to stay here I wanted to go home." I cried. For the first time in a long time I was crying. I hung on to Joe. He just held me until it was over while my grandparents watched from a distance. I felt him rub my back as I cried against. His chest. I felt like everything that was against me in my life was boiling down to this moment the final injustice. Joe finally got me out of the truck and introduced me to my grandparents. My grandmother was a plump woman, though not massive. She had dark hair and stood all of 5' 6". My grandfather was tall like me, thin, wiry and had a head of gray hair. They both had glasses. Though my grandmother had hers on a chain around her neck and grandfather had his on the lower bridge of his nose and looked over the top on them at me. They both had ready smiles and seemed happy I was there. Grandmother was a little reserved though. I think I remember Joe telling me that Grandmother was a teacher or something. I wasn't ready to trust them yet. Though I knew that didn't matter. I was staying here whether I wanted to or not. Joe and I unloaded the truck and put them in the room that was to be mine. All except the weight set that grandmother told me to put in the barn off to the right of the house. I didn't have much so it didn't take long. I tried to make it longer just to keep Joe there for as long as I can. Grandmother fixed us a nice lunch of fried chicken and potato salad. We sat in the kitchen and talked. Well they talked I just listened. "Joe tells me you're a good students with straight A's." grandmother said. Trying to get me to talk. I shrugged my shoulders and shook my head yes. "Noah I know your life hasn't been normal by any sense of the word and it feels like everything is spinning in circles and out of control right now. That being said we understand your quietness. However, when we ask you something, we expect a verbal answer. Not a shake of your head or a shrug of the shoulders." Grandmother said. How did she know what I was feeling right then? Granted she was right but still she didn't know how I felt I wanted to scream at her, you don't know what I feel. It was so quiet. I looked at both my grandparents. I knew I had to answer. "Yes Grandmother, yes Grandfather." I said looking down at my plate. I peeked up at Joe sitting across from me. I could tell from his expression that he agreed with my grandmother. "You don't have to be so formal Noah. Grandma and Grandpa will be just fine." My grandmother, I mean Grandma, said with a chuckle. We finished our lunch and I helped grandma clear the table as Joe and Grandpa went out back and sat on the deck. Grandma and I scraped and loaded the dishes into the dishwasher. Grandma talked and I answered as best as I could about what classes I liked and stuff like that. I never minded doing the dishes or cleaning. Not like my mother had any domestic inclinations to it. It was usually her I had to clean up after anyway. I didn't do because of what people would say if they visited. There was never any visitors. I just couldn't stand living in a pig sty and wanted Joe to come home to a clean house. Not that I am a clean freak. I am after all a teenage boy, but if you had my mom you'd be the same way. I was after all the adult of the house when Joe wasn't home. Which was usually spaced out to maybe one week out of the month. As i wiped down the counter and table, Grandma filled a picture full of lemonade and placed that along with four glasses on a tray and motioned for me to follow her out to the deck in the back of the house. I held the door as she walked out in front of me. I followed her. I jumped when the screen door slammed shut behind me. I looked at grandma ready to apologize. "Been a while since I heard that door bang shut like that. Know I know I got teenager in the house again." She giggled. As she placed the tray of lemonade on the little table near grandpa and Joe. After another hour of talking with me joining in periodically when addressed. Joe stood up and announced it was time for him to take his leave. After shaking hands with my grandparents he asked me to walk him to the truck. We stood by the truck as Joe told me to be good form my grandparents and to listen and keep up. My grades and to try to make friends. "You're beginning a new life Noah. Take advantage of it. Go out for the football team or any sport. Make friends. Try to be happy." He told me. I just looked at the ground and kicked at the pebbles in the drive way. I felt tears but knew I wouldn't cry. I wasn't sad like that. I was afraid. I didn't know what to expect or what my future to be now. Before this I knew I'd get a low paying job and just exist like I did now. Now I was expected to have to live. To have a life. What the fuck. I wanted to go back with Joe and just exist. No expectations. Joe opened the truck door. "I have one more thing for you Noah." He said as reached into the back of the cab and pulled out a box that was labeled "Gateway" with a cow pattern on the box. "I checked with you grandma and there is internet so use this for more than looking at porn." He said with a chuckle. I smiled as I back a put the box down. I gave him a big hug. "I love you Joe." I said not wanting to let go. "I Love you too, Noah. In my heart you're my son but the law says different." He let go of me and smiled again. I'll be back to visit and check up on you. If I hear you been slacking I will not be a happy man." He said as he got into the truck. I watched as he backed up and turned the truck around. He waved before he drove down the road. I watched the truck disappear. I felt that everything that made me feel safe had just left. That only person who understood me was gone forever. I knew he said he would visit but I still felt like I was being swept away in a flood. I turned and walked the front porch where grandma was waiting for me I tried to smile but I didn't work. It just became a frown. I felt her put her arms around me and felt for the second time tears begin to flow. I hadn't cried since I was 7 and in less than four hours I cried twice. I felt so over whelmed with emotions that I had damned up and as cracks appeared in that dam I patched them up. I guess the dam finally gave out there was nothing left to patch. I was a boy pretending to be a tough man. I had face the reality I was a teenage kid with nothing stable or permanent in my life. The only thing that came close just drove off down a dirt road. "I know it hurts baby but you're going to be alright. Everything will get better in time. Joe will be back to visit he is just away not gone." Grandma soothed as she held me there. I felt another set of arms around me. "This is where belong now, son. We'll try and make it a home for you but you need to lets us." I heard grandpa say. After a few minutes like that, after I calmed down, grandpa and grandma let go me. "Why don't you go put away your belongings then explore the area?" Grandma said. I smiled and went to put away my few things. I was about done when the phone rang. i heard my grandmas voice raised slightly agitated but couldn't make out what was being said. I didn't pay much attention as I knew it wasn't for me. Somehow I knew it was about me. I am like the new born baby everyone wants to know about. Isn't that the way of these small towns. I shrugged at the thought and continued to put my meager things away. Placed pictures on the dresser. I would have put up my posters but since there was already some up I didn't want to disturb them. I knew this was really my Uncle Jared's bedroom. Though he was in the marines from the pictures I had seen on the mantle in the living room. I didn't want to disturb his things if I could avoid it. I didn't know anything about him other than he was younger than he was 10 years younger than my mother. I didn't want him to come home with me taking over his room. I heard then phone ring again. I could make out the voice of my grandma again. This time she sounded excited but not in an angry way. I figured if I was to know she would tell me. I had already decided to make myself as invisible as I could. I didn't want to upset or make any waves in their lives. I finished putting my things away, set up the lap top Joe gave me on the little desk in the room. Once I was done i walked down the hall towards the living room to tell grandma I was done putting my things away. No one there I heard grandma talking to in the kitchen and walked in. She was on the phone talking very calmly, so I turned to leave to give her privacy. She waved me over to sit with her at the table. "Thank you Mr. Hearn. I am sure the arrangements will be fine." She said to whomever she was talking to and placed the phone on the cradle on the wall. "We have some things we need to discuss." She said as she sat at the table across from me. "Firstly I was just talking about the arrangements for your mothers final resting. Is there anything special you wish to be done or some remembrance for her?" she asked. I shook my head "No ma'am. I don't think care what you do with her." I answered. I saw her eyes narrow a bit at my words. Though she didn't say anything about my lack of interest my mother's burial I could tell she wasn't happy. I really didn't care. I had stopped caring about my mother a long time ago. Why start now that she is dead. I saw her death as nothing but another upheaval in my life. The only good thing about her death was I wouldn't have to clean up her puke or here her tell me I ruined her life. So I was pretty much okay with her death. I felt a sense of relief about her not being there to hurt me anymore. "Noah are you listening to me?" I heard grandma say. I was so deep in thought I had forgot she was there. "I am sorry grandma I was thinking about stuff. I didn't hear you." I said looking down at my feet. I sat back down. I hadn't realized I stood up. "It's alright Noah. I know there's allot going on right now and everything is moving fast so let me repeat the short version of what I had said." She said smiling. Though I could see concern in her eyes. "Your mother's burial will be this Saturday. It will be mostly just family but I am sure neighbors will pay their respects." She said waiting for my reply. I smiled but didn't say a word. Somethings it's best not to say what you're thinking. "Your uncle Jared is coming is getting the next flight in from camp Pendleton in San Diego. Hebe here tomorrow. You two will be sharing your bedroom. I will set up a cot if you don't want to share a bed. Though it is a large bed. I'd understand if you didn't want to share it as would your Uncle." "It's really his room grandma. So it's up to him." I could tell she wanted to say something but held back. "Well the other part is that Uncle Daniel and Aunt Ruth along with your cousins will be coming for dinner tomorrow also. Uncle Jared should be here by then. We will be eating a bit late tonight." She continued. I smiled at grandma. I knew it was a fake smile. I knew she knew it was one too. In truth it was the best I could do. I didn't know any of these people. I knew of them but that was about it. I tried to show something other than what I felt. What I felt was I don't give a fuck. I knew better than to say that. The last time I swore like that Joe took me to little shed a smacked my ass with a wood paddle. It was the only time he hit me. I saw the pain in his eyes after he did it. I truly believed it hurt him more than me. "Don't ever let me here you say that word again. Never say that word to any adult." I just shook my head yes and hugged him. Grandma gave me a list of chores to do. Like keeping my room clean homework done before I go anywhere. Cutting grass or shoveling snow taking out the trash. You get the idea normal kid chores. Curfew on school nights was 9. Non-school nights was 11. Not that I would be going anywhere. By the time we were done 8it was decided that tomorrow we would go shopping at the Walmart outside of town. She decided I needed more clothing, a suite for Saturday and one for church plus school clothes and supplies. I helped her make dinner as she made a list. After dinner I helped clean up and excused myself saying I was tired was going to turn in early. I went to my room got my tooth brush and shaving kit and went to the bathroom. There was a fresh towel and wash rag already there. I stood in the shower and let the hot water drench me after I washed all my body parts. Of course as washed my dick I was immediately hard. I stroked it as I closed my eyes thinking of the hot guys I seen in magazines. That soon shifted to some of the guys I seen in the locker room at school. It didn't take long before I felt that tingle and then the contractions as began to shoot my load against the shower wall. I leaned my head against the wall waiting for my heart to stop racing and my breathing to become normal. I turn off the shower and stepped out brushed my teeth. I decided to shave tomorrow morning. I crawled into bed in my cut off sweatpants that were well worn but soft and comfortable. I remember thinking about what happened today. I tried to think it was all bad. But I had to honest with myself I wasn't. My grandparents seemed to want me there. I didn't know when it happened but I fell asleep fast and woke to the sun shining through the bedroom window. I had my normal morning wood poking out of my shorts. I reached down and felt it. I smiled and gave it a tug. I looked over to the clock on the nightstand. 6:30 am. I knew I had time to take of it. I tucked the top of my shorts beneath my balls and stroked my 9 inches. I closed my eyes and thought about my favorite model which like usual became the school jock from my old high school. I thought about what it would be like to suck his cock which I guessed would be about 7 inches hard. As my right hand stroked my cock my left hand played with my balls. My picky would occasionally rub my hole. Soon I hand my middle finger inserted in its tight confines. I rubbed that special spot and soon I was humping my fist. I groaned and felt my cum heard my jiz hit the back of the bed. Then felt it hit my chin, chest and abs. I squeezed out the last drops out of my cock and relaxed back into my pillow. I opened my eyes and looked down and saw my semi hard dick in my hand. My chest and abs were covered with thick white globs of my goo. I looked on the head board and smiled one of my longest shots. Using a dirty tee shirt I cleaned up the goo on my body and the headboard. I checked the sheets they were clean. i jumped into the shower and washed up fast. I was careful washing my privates. I didn't want to get my dick hard again. After I finished and dried, I shaved brushed my teeth. I dressed in the new jeans and shirts that Joe bought me. I felt today was going to be good day.. Unusual for me, I was never felt any day was good. I sat down on the bed I had made. I didn't remember making it. I looked around my room my dirty clothes were gone as was the shirt I used to wipe myself after my morning relief session. I could feel my face get red. Grandma. . Oh fuck I thought to myself. So much for the day being good. I made my way down to the kitchen. I could make out the smell of bacon before I even entered the room. I could feel my face redden more as entered the kitchen, if that was possible. I saw grandma's back to me while she was making some scrambled eggs. I stopped not knowing what to do. I admit I was hungry but everything in my body told me to run to avoid the embarrassing situation that was about to take place. "Sit down Noah. Breakfast is about done. I wasn't sure how you liked your eggs so I figured scrambled is always safe." Grandma said as she placed the pate in front of me. I helped myself to some of the bacon and toast on a platter in the middle of table. "Eat up, Grandpa already ate and went to pick up your Uncle Jared." She said pouring herself a cup of coffee as she sat across from me. I cleaned up my plate and helped myself to some more bacon and toast. I was waiting for grandma to say something about my jiz stained tee shirt but she just sat drinking her coffee and looking at a pad and jotting things down on it. I was rinsing off my plate and put it in the dishwasher when I heard a buzzer I knew to be the washer. I felt my face turn red again. "Noah if you can put your clothes in the dryer while I get my purse we can get out of here and do our shopping." I placed all the damp clothes in the dryer, checked the setting and push the start button. I figured grandma didn't notice the tee shirt so I was a little more relaxed as I made my way out the house to meet grandma and the Jeep that was sitting in the front of the house. We made our way down Broadway. Grandma looked over at me and giggled. "You know you're not the first boy in the house. I know what boys do." I felt my face go apple red. Grandma's giggle turned into a laugh. "Relax Noah. Your Uncle Jared kept a rag under the bed. So nothing to be embarrassed about. It's a normal thing." I couldn't help it. The only way I could be embarrassed more was if she walked in on me. The thought of that happening made go red again. We pulled into the big Walmart parking lot. Grandma drove through the parking lanes like she was in a race. When she saw a spot she swung in cutting off another car who blared their horn to let her know what they thought of her out maneuvering them. As we got out we heard a bunch of cussing. Grandma turned around and faced them. Mr. Davies with that limited vocabulary no wonder you're barely passing English. Also shouldn't you be in class. I think you're scheduled for algebra this period. With your last test grades you shouldn't miss any classes." Grandma said as she pulled her bag over her shoulder and walked passed the stunned teenager. I couldn't help giggle. Which got me a nasty glare from the angry teen. I just flexed a little as I faked stretched. I saw his eyes widened a bit and I smiled to myself. Ok that one dude won't be bothering me. Well at least while he doesn't have a crowd. Grandma went through Walmart with a cart throwing in boxer briefs, tee shirts, polo shirts, socks both tube and dress socks. She had me try on sever different jeans and khaki's. "I think you can wear your uncle's suit so we'll save money there." She said as she looked down at my feet and seen my cheap payless sneakers. Grandma dragged me to the shoe area where she had me try on sneakers and shoes. That done we went to the back to school section. Even though school started 3 weeks ago. It was well stocked. Grandma threw in notebooks pads pens pencils paper and so on While she did that I looked at the sketch pads and pencils. Grandma must have seen me she grabbed a few pads and pencil and markers sets. Smiled at me. Pushed the cart down the aisle only to stop again. "Pick a backpack." She said. I picked a camo style one and dropped in the cart. She moved on leaving me to push the cart which seemed heavy even with the wheels behind her to the checkout lanes. When it was our turn to be cashed out the young girl smiled at grandma "Hi. Mrs. Mac A. No school today?" "Sorry to see some things never change. Mind your business Carrol and just ring me up." Grandma ticked at her. Carrol started ring up and chatter away about local gossip. I could tell grand ma was not really paying attention to any of what she said. She just watched the register screen as things were scanned. "Oh and this must be your long lost grandbaby. I am sorry about hearin' about your daughter Mrs. Mac A. I can just imagine what a shock to find out daughter was found with a needle in her arm." "If you do not shut your nasty gossiping mouth this instant. I will make sure this is the last job you have in this town. I am sure your daddy and husband will miss the extra income when they need to fill their alcohol systems." My grandma said very loudly. I watched heads turn towards us and Carrol quickly tried to back track her statement. "Not going to work. This is not high school young lady. Do your job and shut your filthy mouth." Grandma said in very threatening voice. An older man dressed in a suit came up. "Ms. Torrance upstairs now. He took over and finished scanning grandma's purchases. We watched as he put in a few codes then scanned a card. The total came to zero. On us Mrs. Mac Alistair. I am sorry for Carrol's comments. We have been watching and listening to her for some time. This was the final nail in her coffin. We do not abode that kind of behavior here." Grandma just nodded said thank you and led me out of the store. I could tell she was one pissed off lady. The look on her face was one I never wanted directed towards me. "She was a fucking gossiping in school and she still is one. Told that bitch that her lies and gossip would be her ruin." Grand looked at me. I think my jaw was dragging the ground. "What you don't think I can cuss? I can get pissed, get used to it boy. No one messes with my babies." She said and smiled as we loaded up the Jeep Cherokee. It was about three in the afternoon when we headed home after a quick stop at the supermarket. I couldn't help think about what that lady said I knew my mother never shot up. Though, I can see already the rumors were starting. I thought about how my Grandma stood up for me. I never had anyone do that except for Joe when he had to. Even then him not being legally my parent, it was limited at what he could do. I had learned early on it was me against the world. I broke out of my thought as we came to a stop in front of the old farm house that was now home. I guess I think too much and over think it all.