Committed and now it's my turn
[This story was fabricated and created by me, the author. Any similarity to any real life situation, event, or person(s) is purely of coincidence. Please do not distribute this story in any way, shape, part, or form without my expressed consent.]
Patrick's confession to not only being my cousin, but also gay, somehow had a profound effect on me. Hearing him explain to Frank what he felt being boyfriends meant, echoed in my mind and matched exactly with my perception of love. Tommy was mine and no one else had a right to him or to me. I looked at Frank when he said he still wanted what was between Tommy's and my legs. Sure, like he just said, he was not committed. We were committed though. His remark to Patrick, inferring that his current freedom had a hope to change, seemed just another one of Frank's off the cuff, no thought given, statements. I looked from Frank to Patrick and noticed the blush there in his cheeks. He had confessed his attraction to Frank, even that he had fantasized concerning him. Frank had eavesdropped on that confession. I squeezed Tommy's hand in mine and looked at Frank.
"Listen to me Frank. From the first, I've had a problem with us all having sex together. I believe everything that Patrick just told you about love and commitment." I took a quick look at Tommy and then took a deep breath. "Tommy is mine Frank and I'm his, only his. I'm sorry, but we're not going to be having sex together tonight, or any other time. You're my best friend Frank, and that's what I want us to be. You need to decide if that is enough for you. That's what I'm offering, not sex." Tommy squeezed back on my hand when I finished talking to Frank. When I turned to him, he was smiling and nodding his head. He looked at Frank.
"Me too, Frank. I, I was thinking I'm not enough for Brent and if I try and hold him to his word too tight, I'd lose him. I'm through feeling like that. He has to be satisfied with only me. That's what I want and, well, I'm not going to settle for less. I also agree with Patrick. You don't ever cheat or let someone else have what is yours, if you truly love them and are committed." Patrick listened to Tommy as he finished, and nodded to himself. Frank sat on the coffee table, looking from one to the other of us. He sighed and looked down in thought. A few moments passed before he looked at me.
"I want to be friends more than I want anything else. I can't stop wanting what I can't have; we'll just have to live with it. But, who knows, I think that I got a little more than I was even hoping for when I came over tonight." He looked at Patrick, who was intently watching him as he spoke. "Its strange how hearing someone talking about you, when they don't know you're listening, makes you realize certain things about yourself. It seems I've closed myself off from feeling or seeing feelings in others. Especially when those others are so damned cute!" He smiled at Patrick, and then looked at Tommy and me. "So, enough of this shit! I came here to play, and if we're not going to be doing it in bed, then let's do SOMETHING! I've been away from people for two weeks, I need some laughing, yelling and maybe I'll get to cop a couple feels here and there." He waggled his eyebrows and the mood abruptly lightened as we laughed at his ridiculous expression.
For the next few hours, we played console games and generally had a great time together. Patrick cast off his meekness and I saw what he was really like, and I liked it. A one point, we had gotten so loud that for the first time in my memory, my father had come to my door to make sure we weren't destroying the place. Seeing him, I immediately launched in with questions about cousins, aunts, uncles, and anyone else with a sampling of shared bloodlines. He was as surprised as Patrick had been, when he learned that I didn't know of our relation to each other. I got a rundown on who was related to me from his side of the family. There weren't many, but just as Patrick had said, he was the only one close to my age. Surprisingly, Patrick was one of only four guys related to me. All the rest were girls, or women. After drilling him for half an hour and him telling us to keep it down a bit, and not to blow the roof off of the house, he left us to ourselves again.
We decided to watch a movie and Patrick chose "The Notebook". We sat on the sofa, turned the lights off, and squeezed in next to each other. By the time the movie was three quarters finished, my arm was around Tommy, holding him close to me. Frank and Patrick were watching the DVD, but I couldn't help notice a bit of tension between them. Patrick couldn't keep his hands still, and looked to want to take a hold of Franks. Frank was jiggling his left leg, which rubbed against Patrick's, nonstop. I smiled to myself at seeing Frank act in a way that was so out of character for him. After the movie finished, we sat around talking about what Frank had missed in school. I looked at my watch and saw it was 1:00 am and I was getting very sleepy.
"All right guys, it's late and I'm bushed. Come on Frank; help me carry in a cot. The sofa folds out into a bed and then with the cot, you and Patrick will have to decide who sleeps on which." Frank followed me down the hall and to a storage closet. We then carried the "cot", which was more of a roll-away bed than it was an actual camping type cot, towards the game room. As we passed the linen closet, I grabbed stuff to make up the bed. Tommy and Patrick had folded out the sofa sleeper, the linen was still clean on it since Brandon had been the last person who was going to sleep on it, yet wound up sleeping with Tommy and me in my bed. We set the cot up along side the sofa, unfolded it, and I made it up. "If either of you get cold, there's extra blankets in the linen closet just outside the door. There's also an extra bedroom, the door to the right of the linen closet, with a bathroom or you can use the bathroom in my bedroom. Just don't make a lot of noise coming in." I smiled at Patrick and Frank. "If you two decide to share the sofa or the cot, I guess extra blankets for warmth won't be necessary."
"Uh, I don't think so Brent." Patrick said and looked at Frank. Frank smiled at him, and then looked at me.
"If I get too cold, I'll crawl in with Patrick. If I get too hot, I'll crawl in with you and Tommy!" He laughed when I said you wish! I looked at Tommy then back at my two guests.
"Well, you two decide how you want to sleep. Tommy and I are going to bed." I walked over and gave Patrick a hug and kiss goodnight. I was so happy to have him as my cousin and things were definitely going to be different between him and me. I turned and gave Frank a hug and kiss as well. He was my best friend and it was going to be great having him back in school on Monday. Tommy followed me with the goodnight kisses and hugs. I took Tommy's hand and we both walked into my bedroom and closed the door. I grabbed him in a hug and locked my lips to his. He held me tight and kissed me with a lot of force behind his lips. When we broke the kiss, he looked at me.
"I mean it Brent. I don't know what the fuck I was thinking before, but I don't want anyone else to ever come between us or share what we have. I was stupid and should have realized I was being stupid, when you seemed confused by what I was suggesting. I love you so much Babe." He gave me a quick kiss and looked at me again.
"You need to stop always feeling like I want something more than I have Tommy. You're enough for me and I don't need someone else to give me what you already do. I love you too and I only WANT you! What happened at Frank's house when you were in Fargo was nothing more than a moment's lust, and I stopped it before it got too far. Now, let's get in bed and I'll show you how much I want you!" Tommy smiled and started removing clothes as he walked towards the bed. By the time I made it to the bed, I was down to my boxers and watched Tommy pull the sheets back and climb onto his side. Just as I was getting into bed, there was a knock at the bedroom door and both Tommy and I said come in at the same time. The door opened and Patrick stuck his head in.
"Um, sorry, but I need to brush my teeth and us the toilet. Is it all right if I use your bathroom, or should I use the one in the extra bedroom?" He had a sheepish look on his face and a blush.
"Of course you can use my bathroom, here; I'll show you where the washcloths are and the hand towels." I stood up and saw Frank peek around behind Patrick.
"I need to brush my teeth too," He said and grinned real big. His eyes shifted to Tommy lying in bed and back at me, his smile even bigger. "Then, I think Patrick and I had better leave you two alone for the night." He snickered and shoved Patrick on into the room and I showed them both to the bathroom. After getting them what they needed, I left them and climbed into bed with Tommy. Frank was the first to leave the bathroom. He had a big smile still on his face. "He kicked me out. I think he's shy about pissing in front of someone. I had no problem with him watching, but he wouldn't let me!" Tommy and I laughed at the outraged expression on Frank's face, and then Patrick came out of the bathroom. He gave Frank a look, and then blushed when he saw me watching him. Frank was standing in my bedroom in only a pair of Hollister boxers, looking as hot as always and totally relaxed in his state of undress. Patrick was standing there with a t-shirt on and a pair of pajama bottoms. You could still see that he was fit physically, but you could walk outside in what he was wearing and not receive much comment.
"I heard you Frank and I did not watch you piss. I turned by back!" He said.
"Ah, but I saw your eyes in the mirror, sexy. If you get cold tonight, just come over to my bed. I'll warm you up and you can warm me up." Frank looked at Patrick. "You might think about taking some of those clothes off though. I usually can get someone warmed up pretty quick and with those, you'll catch fire." He pointed at Patrick's pajama pants and smirked.
"If you two are through flirting with each other, or even if you're not, would you mind? I'd like to go to sleep," Tommy said and then qualified it, "eventually." Frank reached out and took Patrick by the hand.
"Come on, I'll help you untie the knots in those pajama bottoms." Frank laughed and pulled a blushing Patrick with him through the bedroom door and closed it behind them. I looked at Tommy and smiled.
"I think Patrick is going to have a rough night tonight. I don't think anything is really going to happen, but it won't be for lack of Frank trying everything he can to see that it does." I rolled over towards Tommy. "But hopefully I'm not going to have to try so hard with you?" My answer came when he moved closer to me.
"I want to make love to you Brent." Our lips met and we kissed deeply. I slide my hands down his bare back until they rested on his ass cheeks. I gently squeezed and he moaned into my mouth. He leveraged himself on his elbows and smiled down at me. "You're beautiful Brent. I know that sounds cheesy, but you're beyond handsome to me." I slide my hands into the waistband of his boxers and he moved up until I had managed to slip them down off his waist. I felt his hard cock trail along my abs and chest. He worked his legs out of the boxers and I pulled them off and threw them on the floor. He straddled my chest and I took a hold of his waist and pulled him forward until my mouth engulfed the head of his swollen gland. I circled just the head of it with my tongue and Tommy pressed forward, until more of his heated cock was buried in my mouth. I could taste the flavor of his precum as it leaked out onto my taste-buds. I loved the taste of him.
Tommy withdrew from my mouth and slide down my body. He kissed me and continued down my chest to my boxer covered waist. My cock was fully hard and he massaged it through the material before taking the waistband and pulling them off my boxers. As usual for me, my precum was free flowing and my cock slapped my abs with a generous wet sound. Tommy threw the boxers to the floor and smiled up at me. He took hold of my pulsing shaft and slurped up the offered fluid. My breath caught from the sensation of his tongue sliding across the head. His hot mouth took me in and he used his hand to run up the shaft and milk more out of me.
"I want you so much Cutey, god I've wanted this for so long. Make love to me Tommy. I want to feel you make love to me." I looked down at him, his mouth encased around my cock. He let my cock out of his mouth and he kissed down it to my smooth shaved sack. He took one after the other of my globes into his mouth, gently sucking and rolling them around. The sensation was amazing. I lifted and spread my legs, giving him more access. He looked back to me.
"We need some kind of lube Babe. I don't make half as much on my own like you do." He said. I pulled up and thought for a minute. I opened the drawer of my nightstand, not knowing what I would find. What I found surprised me and even shocked my sensibilities a little. In the drawer was a tube and when I pulled it out and read the label, it read Astroglide. Connie or my father had to of been the ones to put it there. My mind skipped this fact quickly, I didn't need to labor it or it would kill the mood and probably cause Tommy and me both embarrassments to think they knew what we were up too. I'm sure they did, but we didn't need to dwell on it. I closed the drawer and handed the tube to Tommy. He raised his brows, but then smiled and lifted the top. He smelled the contents and then sat up and positioned me under him. He squeezed a generous amount onto his fingers, looked at me and asked, "You ready Babe? I'll go slowly and you stop me if it hurts."
"I'm ready," I said, "I love you Tommy."
"I love you too Brent. I've wanted to make love to you so you can feel what I did with you in me." He gave me a kiss and then I felt his fingers close to my anus. He smeared some of the thick lube over the tiny opening, and then slowly eased one finger into the tight canal. Instead of the pain that I had expected to feel, I felt a warm pleasurable sensation spread through me. Slowly, Tommy fucked one, then two fingers in and out of me, coating the walls of my chute with the silky smooth gel, preparing it to receive his engorged cock. When he felt that my inner muscles had relaxed enough, he eased his fingers free of my grasping hole. As he leaned forward, Tommy pressed the tip of his cock against my well lubed opening, as he pressed his lips to mine. When his tongue invaded my mouth, Tommy jerked his hips forward and forced the head of his cock into my virgin ass.
"Ahh!" I screamed painfully into his mouth as I clamped my sphincter muscles tightly around his invading member.
"Relax, Babe. Just relax," Tommy said soothingly as he tenderly caressed my face. I breathed deeply through my mouth as I attempted to force my protesting muscles to relax and accept his thick cock. I cried out as another wave of pain shot through me when he eased another inch of himself into me. "Do you want me to take it out?" He asked softly, his voice filled with concern.
"No, no." I groaned through clenched teeth. "I want you inside me, Tommy. I want you."
"But I don't want to hurt you," He whispered.
"I want this, Tommy. I've wanted it for forever. Don't stop. I'll be okay," I said reassuringly, as I tired to force my muscles to relax. "I want you, no matter how much it hurts." I pleaded as I looked into his eyes. "Shove your cock into me and fuck me." Tommy hesitated for a minute, and then kissed me hard as he drove his entire length deep. I screamed into his mouth and dug my fingers into his back as shock waves of pain racked my body. I felt certain that my ass had been ripped to shreds. Blinding flashes of white light went off behind my tightly closed eyes, as I tried to force the pain away. I bit down hard on my lower lip as he withdrew an inch or two.
"Are you alright?" Tommy asked, his voice shaking with fear.
"Yes," I panted out quickly, adding, "Make love to me, Tommy. Please!" I wanted him to start sliding his cock in and out of me before I changed my mind and had him withdrew. Tommy took a deep breath and began to withdraw until only the head remained inside me. Slowly, he slide the full length back into me, and then began to fuck my already sore hole with a slow, rhythmic motion. After what seemed an eternity, the searing pain that had overcome my body began to turn into sensations of unimaginable pleasure. It was a form of pleasure that I never could have experienced before. The longer he made love to me, the more the pleasure increased, until I was begging him to enter me as hard as he could. My request turned into a demanding command when I shouted, "Fuck me!"Tommy began to shove his cock into me with all the strength he had. He pounded into my ass as hard as he could. "OH! It feels so good!" I panted out as he slammed deep into my willing hole. "Faster! Harder!" I kept groaning as I thrust my ass upwards to meet his forward push. The bedroom echoed with the sound of sweat drenched flesh slapping against sweat drenched flesh, as Tommy slammed into me with all his might.
"Oh! God! Brent! It feels so good being inside you." Tommy groaned. I could feel his soft cock hair brushing against my balls, and his sac slap against my up turned ass with each of his forward thrusts. "It feels so fucking good, Brent. So fucking good!" Tommy shouted as he pounded my ass.
"Oh, yeah, Babe! I love it! I love having you in me. Fuck me, Tommy! Fuck me!" I pulled his face to mine and kissed him hard as I shoved my tongue deep into his mouth. Tommy slipped his right hand between us, and wrapped it around my hard cock. As he continued to fuck my ass, he started jerking me off. "Oh, yeah, Tommy! Yeah! That's it!" I panted out breathlessly. "That feels sooo good. Make me cum with you! Oh! Yeah! I want to shot while you're filling me with your cum!" I cried out, my voice deep and hoarse with lust. Tommy quickened his pace to match the speed with which his hand flew up and down my stiff shaft.
"I'm going to cum soon!" Tommy panted, sweat dripping from his chin. "I'm going to cum in you. Cum with me, Brent! I want you to cum when I cum." Tommy bucked his hips wildly and yanked at my red cock. His eyes were closed tightly, and a look of shear ecstasy covered his face. "I'm going to cum, Brent! I'm going to cum! I'm cumming!" Tommy cried out as he slammed his cock as deep into me as he could. I could feel his cock jerk and pulse inside of me as the first wad of his thick, hot seed blasted into my ass. Wave after wave of orgasmic pleasure rocked his body as he shot wad after wad of his thick seed deep into my ass. As he filled me, my cock erupted, rocketing out my load for the day. I shot hot ropes of cum into Tommy's waiting hand, while my sucking ass muscles, milked the last drop of seed from his drained balls.
Our bodies trembled as the intensity of our orgasms began to subside. Tommy raised his hand to his face, and sucked my seed into his mouth; I watched as he swallowed. He fell forward, pressed his cum smeared lips to mine. I could taste the flavor of my cum on his tongue when it entered my mouth. Tommy rolled off of me, and lay beside me. His chest heaved heavily as his breathing slowly began to return to normal. Both of our bodies glistened with sweat, and the room was filled with the aroma of sex. After several minutes, our breathing returned to normal. He rolled onto his side so that he was facing me, and as he traced the outline of my lips with his fingertip, he asked "Are you alright?"
"I've never been better." I said softly as I smiled warmly at him. "I never knew that anything could feel so good. So fantastic!" As I continued to smile at Tommy, I added, "Hold me." We held onto each other as the feeling of our joint orgasm faded into a warm inner feeling. I began to have an urge to go to the toilet and unwrapped myself from his embrace. I kissed him and told him I'd be right back. I climbed from the bed and headed for the bathroom. I felt liquid run from my ass and start down the back of my inner leg. When I got into the bathroom, I sat on the toilet and expelled Tommy's cum into the bowl. With the euphoria of the lovemaking subsiding quickly, the soreness of having made love was beginning to replace it. I felt raw. When I wiped, pain shot into me and I could barely finish cleaning myself. I flushed and walked back into the room and Tommy was positioned on his elbow, watching me.
"Uh huh. See, and you thought it was funny when I was in pain. Well, you just wait until in the morning. Then you'll see just how much it hurts." Concern replaced his smile, "But Babe, I love you so much and I'm sorry it hurt. I didn't want to hurt you. I can't believe how you were talking to me though. I mean, damn Brent, you had me so hot with it that my mind shut down and my body just took over." His face changed into another expression. "I can't wait until it's my turn again! It was great making love to you, but it's nothing like the feeling of having you inside me!" I walked laboriously towards the bed and climbed in.
"Forgive me for ever laughing at you! If the pain gets worse, you might have to shoot me in the morning!" I leaned over and gave him a kiss. "Now I think I'm really tired; you definitely wore me out. It was awesome though. Tommy, it was more than I thought it would be. Thank you for loving me Cutey."
"Ah, but you don't need to thank me for that. Now, you turnover on your other side, I think it's my night to hold you close to me." I shifted in the bed, turned out the lights, and felt Tommy pull me into his body. He wrapped his arm around my chest and kissed me on the ear. "Goodnight sexy, you did it for me again and you always will." I smiled at his comment and told him goodnight as well. I fell asleep in the comfort of his body.
The next morning we didn't need an alarm to wake up, we had Frank. Two knocks and the opening of the door had Tommy and I both awake, looking who it was. Frank smiled at us and sauntered through the room to the bathroom. His boxers were tented in front of him with his morning wood and he wasn't shy about displaying it. We got a wink before he disappeared behind the closed door. I turned to Tommy and gave him a kiss. "Good morning cute stuff. I think I'm going to stay in bed all day. The thought of getting out of bed and walking doesn't sound appealing to me. I can't feel a lot of pain right now, but I imagine moving around would end that."
"No you don't! You got guests and you're not going to get away with staying flat on your back to recover. I didn't!" We heard another knock, and this time Patrick came in the room. He looked around the room and walked over towards us in the bed. He looked first at Tommy and then at me. Without waiting for an invitation, he sat down on the corner of the bed. I did notice he had his pajama bottoms on still.
"So, if all the noise Frank and I heard coming from in here last night is any indication, you two had a very good time. I thought I was going to have to fight Frank to keep him from coming in your room and then fight to keep him out of my bed." He looked at me. "You don't hold anything back do you? I mean, dang Brent, you were loud!" He blushed, "You even made me get hard and I almost jumped in Frank's bed without his asking!" I felt my face on fire and heard Tommy laugh. Frank opened the bathroom door and saw the three of us and walked over. He took a seat on the bed right in front of me.
"You two are fucking animals in heat and drove me out of my fucking mind last night! I jerked off four times while you were at it and Patrick is luck I didn't rape him! DAMN!" He looked at Tommy and said, "I hate you Tommy Weber! Who told you that you had the right to snatch Brent away from the rest of us? I'm so jealous right now I could jump out of the window!"
"Whoa, wait a minute Frank! You're jealous? He's my cousin and if he asked me too, I'd be in that bed in a flash! I think I need a cold shower this morning, and probably one for the rest of the week." Patrick boldly announced. Frank looked over at him with a wicked smile on his face.
"Why the hell did you keep telling me to leave you alone last night then? If you had let me get a hold of you, then we both wouldn't be feeling so damned frustrated!" He looked at me and smiles. "I got a peek though. You'd have to be a fucking boulder not to have needed to jerk off with the two of you going at it. Patrick thought he was being sly, but I know how to fake sleep better than the best." He looked at a blushing Patrick. "You and I are going to getting to know each other a lot better Patrick. I think you're cute, I know you're smart, and after seeing you last night, you're fucking sexy and hung! You might not be as big as Brent, but man, what I saw will do me just fine!"
"Enough! Now that the two of you have shared so much with us this morning, I think it's time to get ready and down stairs. Connie probably has breakfast waiting on us and I need to shower." I said and looked at Tommy. He was grinning ear to ear. "What are you grinning about?" I asked. I could still feel heat in my cheeks.
"Oh, I'm just waiting to see you climb out of this bed and walk to the bathroom. I don't want to miss a thing." He chuckled and propped himself up in bed. I sighed and looked at Patrick and Frank.
"Well? What are you two waiting for?" They just looked at me with raised brows. I smiled to myself and thought that if they wanted a show, they would get one. I turned slowly onto my right side, threw back the covers and sat up on the edge of the bed. I took a deep breath, stood up and turned to them. "Ha! I don't feel a thing!" I said. I heard as both Frank and Patrick took a deep breath and Tommy laughed out loud.
"Um Brent, you're not wearing any boxers Babe, and I'd say you probably have the urge to take a piss." He looked down at my waist and I followed suit. My morning wood was in full force and here I was standing at full mast on display in front of everyone.
"Oh! My! God!" Leave it to Frank to speak right up. His eyes were fixed on my penis and he was licking his lips. I hurried and looked at Patrick; his mouth was hanging open, eyes fixated on my prick. My motivation spurred to hurry to the bathroom, I turned quickly and left them staring. I closed the door behind me and leaned against it. The pain in my ass was almost unbearable. I could hear Frank through the door however. "You fucker! Did you see the size of that club! I feel sick to my stomach and if you weren't one of my best friends I think I'd be kicking your ass TJ! You are the luckiest guy in the whole fucking world!" I could hear Tommy chuckling and just imagined him sitting there in the bed, enjoying Frank's typical loss in controlling his mouth.
I moved away from the door and looked at myself in the mirror. My face showed no signs, except maybe a small wrinkling of my forehead, as I coped with the pain. I got over to the toilet and finally released my bladder for a nice long piss. Releasing this pressure seemed to help a little and when I finished, I turned to the shower and pressed the cycle. Tommy opened the bathroom door and came walking in. He was only in the flesh and he obviously needed to release his morning pressure too. I noticed the outer room was empty of Patrick and Frank. Tommy moved over to the toilet and sat down. He leaned forward and pressed his hardon into the bowl. A few seconds later a sigh of relief came from his mouth and he smiled up at me. I smiled back and stepped into the spray from the shower. Tommy joined me when he was finished. He took a washcloth, lathered it with shower gel, and gently began to wash my body for me. He was very gentle around my posterior and planted a kiss on each cheek before washing them. He washed my hair for me and then washed his own hair. I tried to help him but he refused. He said he wanted to take care of me this morning. We both rinsed in the next cycle and he even dried my body with a towel when we stepped out of the shower.
"I love you Brent Stewart." He said. "You know what? This is bad of me, but just knowing how jealous Frank and even Patrick are of me having you, it makes me feel all warm inside. I know it's awful, but fuck it. You are mine." I smiled at him.
"And you're all mine Tommy. If they felt what I felt last night with you inside me, then I think they'd be feeling a little jealous of me as well. I'm not going to lie, it hurts like hell this morning, but it still felt better than anything else I've ever felt last night! I'll pay the price, anytime!" I took him and gave him a hug and kiss. We brushed our teeth and walked out together into the bedroom. Tommy asked me what I wanted to wear and my cutey helped me get dressed and I sat on the bed and waited for him to dress. "Now I feel really bad because of you giving me all this help afterwards and all I did was laugh and watch you!"
"Ah, but you see, I know now how you feel. You didn't know how I really felt. So, it's not the same. Just remember it after the next time you make love to me! I expect equal treatment." He smiled at me and opened the bedroom door. Frank was sitting on the reclaimed sofa, his hair was wet and he was dressed in shorts and tee.
"Patrick is in the shower in the spare bedroom. I offered to wash his back, but he said to get out. I have a lot of training to do with him." Frank sighed, and then grinned. "But, oh boy is it going to be fun!"
"Frank, you better not hurt Patrick. He's, he's almost in love with you dude and if you play too much with his feelings, you will hurt him. That will really piss me off, enough even to have a really bad effect on our relationship. He's my cousin and I won't have him played with." I caught Frank's eyes with my own and impressed upon him the seriousness of my statement. "If you're not interested in having a relationship other than just sex, I think you need to leave Patrick alone. Someone told me once that I was dating material. I think Patrick is the same. He's not out for a quick fuck. He wants it all. Can you give that kind of commitment?"
"Wait a minute Brent. I'm not going to hurt Patrick! Are you serious? I'd, I'd kill any mother fucker who thought to lay a hand on him and I, I don't just want to fuck him! He's different Brent. I still can't tell he's gay even though I know he is...he's unique, or at least he's the first guy I know that has made it past my gaydar and me know for a fact they're gay." He smiled at me and continued, "Besides, he's cute and makes me smile a lot. His shyness is attractive as hell and the way he looks at me makes my heart beat fast. He may be halfway in love with me, but since last night, I think I'm halfway in love with him." Patrick had entered the room and gasped when he heard Frank saying he was halfway in love with him. Frank turned and looked at him. "We'll have to see if we can find the other halves and if not, then at least we can all be friends." Patrick looked at the three of us from the doorway and then back to Frank, who was still watching him.
"I, I can't believe you said that Frank. I wish it were true, but I'm not going to be an easy fuck for you. I, I don't want only that. Not even from you. You overheard something last night that you weren't meant to know. I told Brent how I felt about you, but I had no hope of you ever feeling the same for me. I won't be fucked with and left behind Frank." Patrick was saying to him.
"Patrick wait, sexy, you weren't here to hear the first part of the conversation. Brent already told me that. He also told me he'd abandon our friendship if I was only looking to fuck you and leave. I'm not looking for that. I don't know exactly what I want, but I don't want that. I won't do that to you. I swear it! And I am serious; I feel like we have a chance at something I've denied myself for a long time. Don't let my teasing and stuff put you off. It's just the way I am, and if you really want to know me, you're going to have to accept that part too. Ask Brent, I say what I want when I want to and sometimes it gets me in trouble." I looked at Patrick and nodded.
"He does and it just happens to be one of the things I like the most about him. He's telling the truth. We talked more before you came in. I think the two of you need to have a discussion soon about what you both want, without an audience. We're all friends here now and it would be cool if you two found what Tommy and I have found, but regardless, we're friends and that's important too." I looked around the room and cringed at the thought of walking down the stairs. "We better all get downstairs and have breakfast. I'd rather be shot than have to walk down them stairs, but I'm hungry too!" I laughed.
We hung out a little more after breakfast, but I didn't feel like doing much strenuous activity. I had today to recover before school tomorrow, unlike Tommy had when he felt like I now did, and I wanted to take full advantage of relaxing. Frank and Patrick went for a walk while Tommy hovered over me, and to my utter embarrassment, so did Connie. She frowned a lot and made a few disparaging comments. My Connie hated having me in pain, even though I was partly to blame for my condition. Tommy took her musings and comments in stride. Frank and Patrick returned in time for us to have lunch together. I really did hope they could find common ground and build something that would last between them. They were polar opposites though. One shy to the point of being withdrawn and the other so outrageously extroverted, he was more often than not, the center of attention. I thought a moment and then announced to Frank and Tommy.
"Patrick is part of my group. You both need to let the rest of the group know it and I expect him to be treated like he deserves. I'll leave that group so fast heads will be spinning if a single one of them does or says anything bad about him. I didn't ask for popularity and I sure as hell didn't want to be the lead, but if he's not part of it, then I don't want any part of it." Frank and Tommy looked at each other, and then back at me. Both wore mirror expressions of surprise.
"Brent, you don't even have to say that and of course he'll be part of our group." Tommy said. "We all grew up together Babe, Patrick right along with us. The group isn't about being popular; I thought Frank explained that to you." He looked at Frank, who shrugged his shoulders. "It's a group about helping each other and anyone else that needs us. Sure, it's kind of exclusive. I wouldn't be a part of it, if it weren't for you Babe. But whether I am or not, isn't important to me. Patrick has my lunch and he will sit with my group. He's got you and he has Frank. It's up to him to be a part or not. He will be any way he chooses, but it's up to him to want to sit with it." Frank and Tommy looked at Patrick, who seemed surprised by the conversation.
"I, well, I would really like to sit with Tommy at lunch. He's, he's like my cousin now, right? But, I don't know what everyone is going to think having me sitting with the POD. I'll stick out like a sore thumb." He said.
"POD?" I asked and raised my eyebrows. All three said almost in unison, "Pride of Dakota" and blushed. I frowned and then smiled. "At least it wasn't Prick's On Display; I think I would have fainted!" I caught Patrick's eye and said, "Look, I want you to be a part of it and I really want you and Tommy together. We're family and I think family should stick together. I don't care what people are going to say."
We finished lunch and a little before 2 pm, Patrick's father came to pick him up. Patrick went upstairs to grab his stuff and Frank followed right behind him. Tommy and I stayed downstairs and talked with his father as he waited. Conversation lagged but finally Patrick came back down the stairs again trailed by Frank. Patrick was red in the face and Frank was blushing as well. We told each other goodbye and we'd see him at school tomorrow. I turned to Frank after Patrick left with his father.
"So what were the red faces about when you two came down from upstairs?" I asked him.
"I kissed him and, well, he kissed me back. He, he told me he loved me and I couldn't tell him that, yet, but I told him I wanted him to come over my house after school on Monday. I guess I wasn't clear enough, because he said he wasn't going to let me fuck him if I didn't love him and I opened my mouth as usual and inserted my foot." Frank blushed a little now. "I told him we'd be fucking alright, but it wouldn't be on Monday. Monday I said was for exploring. Well, we kind of both blushed over it." I looked at Tommy and we smiled.
"Frank, you are one sexy asshole and I love you for being just who you are. I hope you don't screw this up and make an ass out of yourself. If you want my opinion, I think Patrick and you would be perfect for the other. You need some grounding and he needs to open up more. Maybe somewhere in the middle, you'll both make a whole person!" I hugged him and quickly let go. His habit of hugging low caused my ass to hurt again. Frank stayed until after dinner. His father came for him and we said goodnight. My father joined us at the door after Frank left.
"Well, now that the gang has all left, maybe now is as good a time as any for the three of us to have a little chat. Why don't you two follow me to my office?" He turned and started walking away and after sharing a look, Tommy and I followed after him. When we were all in the office, my father sat down in his chair and we took the chairs in front of the desk. "All right, you two, I can see from the way Brent has been walking all day that the favor has been returned. I don't want to embarrass either of you, but Want to get serious for a moment. There are a lot of diseases in this world and a lot of unsavory ones are passed between couples during sex. You have to watch out for any unexpected pains and abnormal sensations, and then let me know about them. There's also something even more important than that, and that is exclusivity. You both were virgins before your relationship and only have each other to worry about as long as it remains that way, meaning just the two of you." He looked at each of us with a direct gaze, and then spoke to us both. "HIV is deadly and is spread most often in gay men by anal intercourse. If you don't have it, you can't spread it, but you can catch it from having multiple partners who aren't sure of all the other people they have had contact with. Using protection during sex, oral and anal, can prevent the spread, but not 100%. The only sure way to prevent it is to be celibate and not come into contact with any other person's bodily fluids. You two need to make a solemn pack and keep it. Either you two are exclusive with each other or you start now to wear protection and be cautious. I would prefer that you use protection regardless, it's not a sign of promiscuity, and it's just prudent."
"I'm exclusive and I will only be with Tommy as long as we are together. We learn about this stuff in school, but I know you're only looking out for us dad." I turned to Tommy. "Tommy, I swear to you that I will never have sex with another person as long as we are together. I'm in love with you and no one else. I don't want anyone else. If you want to wear protection, it is fine with me. I've never used it, well, you know that, but I will, just to make sure I keep you safe and you don't have to worry about me keeping my word. I will always keep my word to you though." I looked him as directly in his eyes as I could. I pulled with all my soul at his to make sure he understood. He always said he could tell my soul through my eyes and this was as honest as I'd ever be with him. His look was as direct with me when he repeated the same affirmation to me. We looked at my father and he nodded.
"I'll buy you some condoms and place them in your nightstand where Connie put the gel. Use them when you wish, but just remember what you both promised here tonight. I love you both and I don't want anything to happen to either of you. I'm sorry Tommy, but my overriding concern is with Brent's safety as I'm sure your father's is with your own. Remember boys, this is life and death. Now, tomorrow you both have school and you better make sure you have any last minute homework finished and then you should probably get a good night sleep." He stood up and came around his desk. He gave me a hug and kiss on top of the head when I stood, and repeated the gesture with Tommy. We told him goodnight and after telling Connie goodnight and hugs, we headed up to my rooms.
Tommy spooned me again when we settled into the bed for the night. Having him in my bed, holding me, and feeling his breath against my neck, gave me so much comfort. I fell asleep completely content, and awoke with our positions changed, and me holding him in my arms, with his head on my chest. I ran my hand through his hair and he looked up at me. I smiled and told him I loved him. I reached and turned off the alarm while Tommy climbed out of bed and stretched.
"You know what I think?" He looked at me and raised his left brow. I smiled at him.
"What do you think Cutey?" I rolled out of bed and stood up. I still felt a little sore, but it wasn't too bad. Tommy walked around the bed and stood in front of me.
"I think we should stop pretending. I'm tired of all the sneaking around in school and having to watch what we say and do." He was watching for my reaction, I could tell. I hated all the sneaking too.
"Tommy, I would come out to everyone and say to hell with whoever couldn't accept it, but you have an advantage over me still. I'm new in this town and even in our school. There are still so many things I'm not used to dealing with. I think if I had to also confront bigots and fight to be who I am, it would overwhelm me fast." I stepped forward and hugged him. I kissed him and then looked in his eyes. "Give me my freshman year and if we aren't found out before then, I will come out with you when we're sophomores. But to be honest, I don't think we will have that long to wait. All it will take is for one person to ask me if you're my boyfriend, because I won't deny you, for it to begin. Let's agree on one thing though? If either of us is found out, all bets are off and we charge out. Not meek and ashamed, but strong and proud Tommy. I don't do meek well at all." He laughed when I finished.
"You meek? I can't even start to picture such a thing, but I agree with what you want. I just want to have you close to me as much as possible. I hate having to avoid physical contact with you." I thought about what he said and at least I could give this much now. Whatever the consequences, then so be it.
"Then don't. I'm from California right? People already expect I must have some weird habits and all. Hug me, kiss me on the cheek, pinch my ass, just don't grab my cock and I think we will be all right. I guarantee Frank will fall right in with it and what Frank does, the group soon follows. If all the popular guys of our school started mimicking my touchy habits, then who the hell is going to say shit about it. Let's give it a try. If it exposes us, then fuck it. I want to touch you too!" Tommy's smile broadened on his face and he hugged and kissed me.
Frank and Matt would both be returning to school today. It seemed forever since I last spoke to Matt. I decided I was going to stop fighting against his wanting to be my friend and welcome it completely. His attraction was no worse than Frank's for me, if a little more direct. My only remaining reservation was knowing that Matt felt he was in love with me, not solely lust. We showered, dressed, ate breakfast, and grabbed our bags when Hank honked for us from outside. My father reminded me about Drivers Ed, and then Tommy and I walked out to Hank.
"Good morning guys!" Hank greeted us as we climbed into the SUV. "Brent, I'll probably be over at the little league field after your divers course this evening. Scott has a game and I think Mike and gang will be there too. If I'm not out front, then just walk over and join us, ok?"
"Sure Hank, I'd like to see the game anyway. I don't play baseball, but I think I'd like to watch if someone I know is playing." I told him. We left the farm and headed into Beulah. I still hadn't made it into town to visit any shops or stores. Every school day, we passed a park along the way to the school that had benches and grassy lawn for picnics or just sitting around and visiting with friends. I really needed to try and make an effort to explore the town I was calling home. Hank dropped us in front of the school and after saying goodbye, drove away. Tommy and I walked together into the building. When we walked into the cafeteria to join the guys at our usual morning table, I smiled when I saw Patrick sitting there. He was on Frank's right and my chair to the left of Frank waiting empty for my arrival. Tommy sat on my left and when I sat down, I looked across at Barry and John. "Morning guys." Everyone at the table smiled and offered us good morning. I looked at Patrick next. "Good morning cousin! I see you found a seat."
"Well, Frank actually dragged me across the commons, across the cafeteria and planted me in this chair and then threatened me to make me stay." Patrick laughed.
"I didn't threaten him; I only told him if he moved I'd kiss him in front of everybody." Frank said as if it were normal everyday conversation. A few of the guys chuckled; they had obviously heard the premier performance. Patrick blushed, but smiled.
"Well, that is a serious threat and I'm glad you decided to stay. Who knows what Frank's had in his mouth lately?" I said.
"Now Brent, don't go telling secrets about us fucking this weekend! You'll make the guys jealous, but I see your ass has recovered from the pounding you received!" Frank laughed and this time I blushed. The table erupted in laughter, but when I looked across at Barry, he raised a brow at me. I leaned over and whispered to Tommy to follow me.
"Barry, would you and John come outside with me and Tommy for a minute. We want to tell you about what you asked last week." Barry and John stood up. We walked out the side door from the cafeteria to the outside benches. I turned to Barry and John. "Tommy's my boyfriend. Frank didn't, um, make love to me this weekend, Tommy did. I can tell you're not surprised; I just wanted to make sure you knew that Frank was only joking. Tommy and I are committed to each other." Barry looked at Tommy then at John. John nodded his head to Barry, who then looked back at me.
"I assume you guessed that John is my boyfriend and he and I are committed also. I knew when I raised my eyebrow at you when Frank finished his joke, you weren't happy. I had a feeling about you and Tommy, but it was your deal and not mines to bring it up. John and I have been together since 8th grade as boyfriends, but we've lived our whole lives with each other. Our mother's were best friends in high school and they still are." Barry looked next to him at John and smiled. John gazed at Barry with open affection in his eyes. I suddenly felt so good inside. Here were two guys who had stayed together since middle school and survived through their junior year! Barry turned his head towards me. "I think we all should make a point of getting together more Brent. We think it's cool that you and Tommy are gay like us. We have even more in common now. We'd like to hang out with you two." I looked at John and he was still watching Barry as he spoke. Tommy was silent also and this somehow struck me as strange.
"Sure Barry that would be great." I looked at Tommy for him to comment, but he remained silent looking at me. I frowned at him and he smiled.
"Good then. I'm glad you decided to tell us, we had already decided to tell you two, but were just waiting for the right time. It was John who caught the signs, my gaydar doesn't work." He laughed and so did I. Barry and I have that in common too. The bell rang and decided to make a start. I hugged Barry and then John. Both returned the hug and had huge smiles on their faces when Tommy did the same. We all walked into the cafeteria and said our goodbyes. Frank and Patrick came over to me and we walked out of the cafeteria. Tommy and Frank left for their homerooms and Patrick walked with me to ours. I put my arm around Patrick and pulled him in close to me.
"I love you Patrick. I want you to know that you mean a lot to me. I hope we become as close as brothers. I always wanted a brother, but a cousin will do for me."
"I love you too Brent. I could cry because of how happy I've been since Saturday. Well, I did cry actually, but only in my room at home. I need you as much as you think you need me. It sucks being an only child and a cousin will do for me just fine too." We walked into our homeroom with my arm still around him. Every head turned to watch as we made our way to our seats. Patrick in front of me and me behind him since day one of school. So close, yet me having no idea that the boy who sat in front of me was mine from the beginning and I was his, we just hadn't really met yet. That was over now and I wasn't ever going to let him go.
I hope you enjoyed this segment of Learning to Love. If you'd like to e-mail me, you can do so at firstname.lastname@example.org . Feedback is welcome and appreciated.