Date: Sun, 07 Nov 1999 11:30:13 PST From: Robert J. Cutter Subject: "A VICTORIAN ROMANCE - Chapter 3" (Man/Man) Disclaimer: The following is a work of fiction. All of the characters are fictitious, as are the locales. If any aspect of male/male relationships offends you or if you are averse to anything gay, please leave now. A VICTORIAN ROMANCE ------------------------------------ Copyright 1999 by Robert J. Cutter - All Rights Reserved The author retains all rights to this story. It is not permissible to distribute it to any newsgroups and/or other web sites without the express written consent and permission of the author. Chapter 3 - The Victorian Crown "This is absolutely the best one yet?" Wally was saying after tasting the roast chicken with mango chutney and honey glazed pecans. "Definitely the best!" "Don't say anything, Wally! Please! Just write down your comments on the sheet!" Cara said rather loudly. "Okay, okay!" Wally said with a smile. "But it is good!" It was the middle of July. Cara and Hart had us tasting new dishes every single day, sometimes as many as eight or ten a day; this included salads, appetizers, main courses, cheese courses, desserts, post-desserts, coffees, teas and anything else they could dream up. It was an education in eating and we all loved doing it. The "we" included Wally, Chris, Rudy, Rudy's girlfriend Cheryl, Cara's children, Sheriff Carmichael, Judge Collinsworth, their wives and an occasional guest. "Do you think you'll make your opening date?" Judge Collinsworth asked between mouths full of food. "I certainly hope so!" I replied. "A lot depends on how soon we can get our liquor license." I looked pointedly at him. "Then there's so much more to do before we can really begin to operate." "We're going to start with dinners only, five nights a week, Wednesday to Sunday," Hart interjected. "Gradually we'll expand to seven nights and add lunches. Of course we're going to have full gourmet breakfasts every morning, otherwise it wouldn't be a bed and breakfast, would it?." The kids laughed and Hart smiled. "We're going to open with six, maybe up to eight guest rooms?" Wally noted. "Most on the main floor will be about fifty percent furnished. There're TVs to buy, telephones to install and lots of other stuff. Oh Christ! Laundry! I'd better get on that tomorrow?" The last two weeks had been a purchasing and logistical nightmare. The supplies we need were almost endless - everything from beds to pens. We required tons of furniture - literally. Enough was needed to furnish at least six bedrooms, rooms on the main floor (especially the dining room), not to mention Cara and Hart's apartment over the garages and Chris' room in the turret. We were toting furniture every day. The general plan was to begin taking lodgers toward the end of July and initiate restaurant service on August 1st. Our strenuous and immense work was definitely beginning to pay off, though. Five of the eight guest rooms were completely furnished and a sixth nearing completion. In addition four additional bedrooms were partially furnished and the dining room, sitting room and conservatory on the first floor were about 75% done. Chris finally had some real furniture in his turret. Rudy, and a few of his friends (yes, the parolees from his "escapade") were of tremendous help. Whenever Wally had his days off, the four of them would go out scouring surrounding counties for furniture and other fixtures and amenities for the house. They had been very successful, especially in towns that had at one time been resorts. A general contractor was busy finishing the rooms above the kitchen. These would be used, if necessary, to house kitchen/restaurant staff. They were to be simple and utilitarian, not furnished in the style of the rest of the house. I had hired Rudy as a groundskeeper and general handyman. He was an excellent worker. Wally had convinced me to hire him despite his bad police record; he was sure that the event was merely an aberration and that Rudy was really a very good kid. So far the results had borne out Wally's assessment. The house was shaping up beautifully, and so was our young charge, Chris. Judge Collinsworth had declared Chris' mother an unfit parent (in absentia) and had awarded me guardianship of that great kid. His grandmother had been committed to a state asylum. However, through help of the judge and various others, we were able to place her in a private sanitarium where she was given proper treatment and care. We made sure that Chris visited her at least once a week; sometimes she recognized him, sometimes she didn't. Chris was so happy when the Judge gave his ruling that he just cried for about five minutes, right there in the courtroom. He was almost in a state of shock when we returned home and I carried him into his official new home. Wally and the others were waiting for us; they had prepared a wonderful surprise luncheon for all. He was such a great kid and looked really great since he had gained some weight. He also had been incredibly helpful around the house setting up furniture and acting as a general handyman and sous-chef in the kitchen. Wally had continued his job as deputy, working seven-day shifts and then having four days off. When he worked he stayed at his own apartment, living at the house only on his days off. I missed him tremendously whenever he wasn't here. My bed was so lonely without my beautiful Deputy Wally. He was a very loving man and I felt wonderful and proud to have him as a partner. We had placed advertisements in local newspapers weeks before the date of our opening. It was too late to get advertisements into programs for the local festivals, so we decided to run a few local cable television spots in large metropolitan areas. They were thirty seconds long and were a little amateurish, but seemed to work. We established a web site (designed by Cara, with help from John) and it proved to be quite popular. The 800-number we established began to ring steadily and a few days before officially welcoming our first guest we were 75% booked for the month of August, and over 80% booked for September and October, the fall foliage season. We advertised the establishment as a luxury bed and breakfast, with all amenities available and a gourmet breakfast served every morning. We welcomed families and made special provisions for kids. Having four kids in residence made this part much easier. The local kids who had gone to camp had returned - the camp was only for two weeks. And it appeared to me that Chris seemed to have become their leader. At first I thought it was because he lived in the best house for miles around and that carried a certain cache. Then I realized that it was because he seemed to have developed a real take charge attitude and a new seriousness. He was asserting himself not only with his friends but also within his new family. The kid was really growing up and I was proud of him and his accomplishments. During those hot July days, the large swimming pool at the rear of the property was the focal point of much of the activities taking place. After a long day of work, everyone changed into bathing suits and jumped into the refreshing water. It was great! It was always such great fun with the kids playing, Rudy and his friends trying to impress the girls, and, when he was available, my beautiful, hunky Wally wowing everyone in sight. The kids loved the way he played with them; he was so much like a big kid himself. Cara had always home-schooled her children, and after moving into the apartment over the garages she set up a schoolroom in one of the small rooms there. She had three computers and immediately began with lessons every day for the kids. I spoke to her about Chris and his obviously poor education and schooling. She said she would talk to him in detail and hoped to do some testing. Cara was, among other things, a licensed elementary school teacher; she changed professions as often as most of us change our underwear. Three days later we spoke in detail about Chris. "He is probably handicapped with attention deficit disorder. He can learn, but with ADD we need to take an entirely different track and he'll probably need medication. For that you will have to take him to a qualified child psychiatrist. Also, daddy, you'll be very happy to hear that he isn't stupid - in fact, he's actually rather bright. But he seemed to be extremely undernourished in the past and this definitely prevented him from learning properly. He always fretted about the dire poverty in which he lived. While in school he was subjected to derision and abuse from other kids. This too prevented him from learning properly. I think he was too weak to fight back even though he was bigger than most kids." I shook my head. "Poor kid," I said in an exasperated voice. "What that poor kid had to endure. Can you help him, Cara?" I asked anxiously. "It'd be great if he could be schooled along with your kids and I'd be so very grateful." "Sure, I suppose so, daddy. I don't see why not. But we'll need another computer and probably more room and maybe some other items." "What about the construction of some kind of schoolroom and computer facility in the basement of the house?" "Would you be willing to do that? It would be great! It'll cost plenty of money, though." "Of course I'd do it; what the hell is a few thousand dollars more going to matter? Especially if it's for my grandchildren and Chris." She smiled at my seeming indifference to money. "I wonder if there're any other kids in the area who would be interested in this type of schooling? It certainly would be optimum if we had six or seven kids attending." "Does grade matter?" "Not really. We can swing most anything. John, Lily and Avi are all at different grade levels and things work fine with them." "Let's find out. I'll ask Chris if there are any kids he'd like to attend school with." -------------------------------------------- We accepted our first guests on the scheduled opening day of The Victorian Crown. The newly installed signs out front read, The VICTORIAN CROWN A Luxury Family Bed and Breakfast Wayne Franklin A second sign hung underneath: The ALEXANDRIA Creative Modern American Cuisine In An Old World Setting Cara Franklin Hart Strauss Both signs were very discrete and were illuminated by small halogen spotlights. Everything about The Victorian Crown was to bespeak quiet elegance. We all worked up to the opening minute of The Victorian Crown. There were literally thousands of small details to attend to. And one and all were completely helpful and just wonderful; every person worked for the betterment of the new establishment and left personal choices and preferences on a back burner. Wally and Chris were super and so wonderfully caring about me and supportive of me. They made sure I did not get over tired and that I rested when I need it. Of course, having Wally in bed with me made the rests more relaxing and much more fun. Cara, her kids and Hart were busy with the new kitchen staff and creating schedules for the operations of the kitchen. They had stocked the refrigerators, freezers and pantries with all kinds of wonderful foodstuffs and created sample menus for our approval. By the end of each workday we all had just enough strength to crawl into our beds. There was quite a crew helping. Besides Wally, Chris and me, and Cara and Hart and Cara's kids, there were Rudy and three of his friends, plus Rudy's current girlfriend Cheryl, and two more young women who were acquaintances of Cheryl's. They were from nearby towns and were pleasant young women. They would eventually be the beginning of the wait staff for the dining room/restaurant while Cheryl (who was nineteen, three years older than Rudy) would become the hostess. It was a young staff, with no preconceived notions of what a bed and breakfast or a restaurant should look like or how it was to be operated. The housekeeping crews consisted of older women and men from the immediate areas. These would be expanded as requirements necessitated. I tried to convince Wally to leave his job in the sheriff's department, but he didn't want to. I think it was that he wanted to be...how shall I put this...I think he wanted to be free, to feel that he was in control of his life and destiny. I supposed he wanted to be on his own, that the fear of committing to another person (or persons since there was both Chris and me involved) was scaring him. I believe the feeling of responsibility overwhelmed him. The opening day was a Thursday and it found The Victorian Crown to be quiet and stately, as befitted the shining opulence of the building itself. At precisely 12:47 PM our first guest arrived. They were an elderly couple, the Garrisons, who were staying for four nights and would be attending the opera season at Glimmerglass. I was behind the magnificent front desk, which was really a desk. The guests would sit down in front of the desk while I sat behind it and registered them. The reservation system was completely computerized and functioned beautifully. I would then stand and lead them back to the main entrance hall where Connie (one of Rudy's buddies) would assist them to their room. Everything was done to preserve the quality of the house as a home, because it was a home. It was my home, Chris' home and home to Cara and her extended family. That first day, all six of our rooms ready for occupancy were taken. Two rooms were occupied by elderly couples, two by yuppie couples and two by families with small children. The room fees were reduced from what we ultimately expected to charge because of the unfinished state of the dwelling and because of the learning experiences of the staff. Unfortunately for me, Wally did not consider The Victorian Crown to be his home. Even though he stayed here and slept in my bed when he was off duty, Wally did not want to resign his job and/or move in with me on a permanent basis. I found this to be very, very disturbing. Wally was very loving and very wonderful in bed; the sex continued to be great and we both seemed to enjoy it very much. However, at times, when we were together, I had the distinct feeling that he was off in another world and I felt disconnected from him. For some reason, he also did not seem completely happy.he exhibited an air of aloofness and standoffishness. I thought I detected a feeling of boredom on Wally's part. I first attributed it to a letdown after so much work had been done getting the business running. I subsequently began to think that there was someone else - something much more disturbing. I thought that Wally had found another man. But this didn't make sense because I called him regularly when he was away and I was always able to reach him. Yet I was sure that something was bothering him and it was having a profound effect on me. On the business side, our guests seemed very pleased with the accommodations and service at The Victorian Crown. The comments about the breakfasts were particularly strong and shining. Cara and Hart were incredibly happy, even though the opening of The Alexandria had to be rescheduled to August 10th because of a problem getting an important piece of kitchen equipment. We were also planning on opening four more guest rooms on the same date. The furniture kept arriving and the rooms were slowly being furnished and finished. Cara was working on the dining room and the conservatory, which would become an adjunct to the dining room. She even had the grand scheme of eventually having weddings here; she thought it to be so unbelievably romantic. Two days before the opening of the restaurant, I was registering new guests when I received a call from Wally. I was excited to hear from him because he had four days off and would be staying as we opened the additional rooms and the restaurant. "Wayne, I won't...won't be coming over tonight. Something's come up." "What is it Wally?" "Can't say, but it's real important. I'll call tomorrow, okay?" "Yeah, if you say so." I turned away from the registering guest and whispered, "I love you, Wally" into the phone. But he had already hung up. I was devastated. Now I was definitely convinced that there was someone else in Wally's life. This realization soured the rest of my day and I was in a real bitchy mood. I yelled at Rudy when he did something I had not authorized, which was really not like me. With the restaurant opening only two days away, with the place completely booked for the first dinner (and for days afterward), I was terribly stressed. That night, in bed, I could not fall asleep. I could not concentrate on anything except Wally. My mind kept playing possible scenarios over and over and over. Who was it? Someone from the department? Someone here? Who? "I'll bet it's Rudy! Of course! It must be Rudy! Who else? He's good looking, has a great body - parading around at the pool like he does. And I know he has great equipment. I could see that goddamned large basket he sports - everybody could. Rudy! That's why Wally wanted him hired!" I began to take out my frustrations at Rudy; I was livid! Then reason, and a semblance of sanity began to take shape in my mind. "Of course, come to think of it, Rudy seems to be completely heterosexual. And that girl, Cheryl, clings to him like a lichen on a tree. Maybe it's not Rudy. Maybe it's someone in the department. Of course, someone he sees all the time and can be with at any time." I tried remembering the men from the department who had, on occasion, helped Wally procure some furniture and other objects for The Victorian Crown. I was working myself into an incredible rage and beat my fists into the mattress. I noticed the door to my upstairs office open and Chris came slowly down the stairs. He walked over to my bed and got under the covers with me. He gave me a big smile and I managed to smile back at him. He was so cute. He had gotten taller in the weeks he lived here, gained some much needed weight and became more handsome and attractive. He still wore his hair in the long ponytail first done by Wally. He was developing into one really adorable and sweet kid. I was so lucky to have him with me. He was naked under the bedcovers, as was I. He snuggled close to me and put his arm around my neck. "I know ya miss Wally." "I do, Chris. I really miss him. I just don't understand why he won't be here with us when the restaurant opens and what is so important to keep him away." "It mus' really be somethin' very important, Wayne. Ya know that? I know Wally won't be away unless it's somethin' really important." "You're right. It must be something really, really important." I held Chris close to my body and soothingly stroked his back. "This feels so great!" he said softly. He did the same to me. It felt so comforting and reassuring holding my boy like this. My tensions eased, my mind relaxed, as did my body. We were fast asleep in a matter of minutes, each cradled lovingly in the arms of the other. -------------------------------------------- Three days passed and still I had no word or messages from Wally. I was extremely upset and almost beside myself with worry. I made inquiries of the sheriff and his fellow officers, but everything came up a blank. The opening of The Alexandria Restaurant was a great success with almost everybody lavishing praise on the quality of the food, the service and the decor. Of course, there were a few slipups, but that was only to be expected. Thankfully there was nothing serious, nothing that either the kitchen staff or the dining room staff could not handle. Chris and I continued to sleep together every night that Wally was gone. It was also comforting to me and I know it was a help to Chris. He was equally upset with Wally's apparent disappearance.or was it abandonment? Early the next morning my private telephone line rang. I scampered out of bed to answer it. I was stunned to hear Wally's voice. I was so happy I cried. "Where are you, Wally? I need to know!" "Wayne, gonna put someone else on the line. Please talk to him and listen to what he has to say. Okay?" Here it comes; here's Wally's new lover. A terrible sinking feeling began to develop in the pit of my stomach and a wave of nausea swept over me. Chris had awakened when he heard me mention Wally's name. He stood next to me and I put an arm around his waist. "Mr. Franklin? My name is George Hammersmith. I'm an oncologist and I'm treating your friend Wallace Travers here at University Hospital in Albany." I was speechless. I sat down slowly, almost dropping the phone. I could only berate myself for my rush to judgment about Wally's behavior. "Oh, God! Wally's in the hospital - in a cancer ward. He's being treated for cancer and he I was ready to put him in some other man's bed. What a shithead, what an unthinking, unloving, fucking shithead I am!" "Yes, doctor. What is it?" I spoke slowly into the phone. "Mr. Franklin, I would like you come to the hospital as soon as possible. I'd like to speak with you personally, privately and candidly." I was absolutely stunned! "Y-y-yes doctor," I stammered. "I'll be there as soon as possible." "Will it be within the next few hours?" My head was spinning. The doctor's voice seemed so far away.so distant.like on another planet. "Yes, I'll be there in under two hours." "Good. When you get to the hospital, go to the main entrance information area and ask them to page me. Dr. George Hammersmith." Wally got back on the telephone. "Wayne? Are you okay Wayne?" "Oh, Wally. Are you all right? I was so worried when we didn't hear from you. I am still so worried. Tell me that you're all right, Wally. Please tell me that." Wally was hesitant. "Can't honestly say that Wayne. Please come soon? Okay?" "Okay Wally." I hung up the phone and began to cry hard. Chris put his arms around me and held me tightly. I cried on his shoulder while he soothing rubbed my back. I told him that I had to go to Albany because Wally was very sick and in the hospital. He wanted to come along with me but I told him he needed to stay here. I felt awful thinking about Wally, alone in a hospital bed. I felt even worse when I thought of all the terrible things I had envisioned when Wally was away form me. Wally was alone, while I had Chris here taking care of me and comforting me. Wally was alone in a cancer ward of some cold, impersonal hospital. I was here, comfortable and happy, surrounded by those I loved...and those who loved me. I cried harder. -------------------------------------------- Wallace Kenneth Travers died in mid-November, six weeks before his twenty-fourth birthday. The cause was non-Hodgkin's lymphoma. Wally - beautiful, sexy, magnificent Deputy Wally - my love, my lover and my partner. The funeral was in Canandaigua, the county seat. The day was cold and clear, the sun shining brightly. The turnout was very high, including sheriff's department personnel from four counties, local residents and county workers. Practically every resident of Shadow Springs was there. Wally's sisters had flown here earlier in the week from Montana; they were able to see him before he died. The services, which were non-sectarian, kept with Wally's wishes. His coffin was carried on the back of horse-drawn 1880's fire pumper. He was cremated, his ashes placed in a black urn and given to me. I was charged with the disposition of them as I saw fit. At times, Wally's suffering was truly terrible. There were harrowing times during those three months since his first hospitalization. The chemotherapy and drugs administered had devastating effects on his beautiful body. He lost weight, his hair fell out and he was weak most of the time. After each hospital session, Wally returned to The Victorian Crown. He seemed to love it here. He liked the quite stateliness yet friendly atmosphere of the big house. He liked sitting in the gardens and playing and talking with Chris and with Cara's kids, and sometimes even with guest children. It always seemed to brighten his day when there were kids around. I realized that Wally's seeming estrangement and aloofness from us, and his unwillingness to leave his job, indicated to me that Wally had realized his cancer had returned. He did not want to be a burden on me with high medical bills. It was a very generous action on his part. The Victorian Crown and the Alexandria restaurant closed for the season on October 31st. We had a big Halloween party in the restaurant for the town kids and a final dinner for the staff, friends and family. Wally was able to attend and he seemed to have a grand time. Cara, Hart and the kids had decided to stay the entire winter at the house. They felt it would be cozy and would give them time to recharge their inspiration and to try new and different recipes. The kids would continue their schooling (along with Chris and three local kids) while we all tended to Wally. I would certainly be staying with Wally - there was never a question of that. Wally's last stay at The Victorian Crown was difficult and yet had happier moments. We set up a hospital room for him in the alcove of my bedroom, complete with all the requisite equipment. We took turns caring for him. He was generally with it and we spoke of future plans for the establishment including the restaurant and the possibility of offering package deals during the winter months. Wally was very much aware of what was going on. He was lucid and fun to be with most of the time, with the exception of times when he had to take powerful painkillers or immediately after the administration of a certain drug used in the chemotherapy. I remember so very clearly my last time with Wally. It was late at night and Chris was already asleep in my bed. "Noticed that Chris is already taking my place, Wayne?" "That's not true Wally, and you know it. You are my man - and only you. Nobody needs to take your place; and I don't want anyone but you." He looked at me and spoke in a hushed, hoarse voice. "Remember that first night, Wayne?" "I most certainly do, sweetheart." "We were both so scared. You about never having done it with a man before and me.me because of my one ball and small cock. Jeez, we were quite a pair." "A very loving pair, I may add." "Yeah," he said in a very breathy voice. "A very loving pair." He smiled at me. He was so painfully thin I barely recognized him. That manly chest and his wonderfully chiseled features were now a thing of the past, yet his eyes - those marvelous, luminous eyes - still sparkled with mischief and joy and love. He lifted his hand and I grasped it tightly. 'You will need lots of people in the future," he whispered. "Everyone here is really so good.and so helpful. And Chris is so loving and caring. He's become such a handsome young guy. It makes me a little jealous." "You have nothing to be jealous about, my love. Nothing at all." I squeezed his hand and he smiled. "I love you so much, my precious Wally. So very, very much." "I love you too, Wayne. Your love and devotion...these last months we've...we've been together...have made this the...the best time in...my life. The absolute best...the best..." He then drifted off into a drug-induced sleep - from which he never awoke. Wally's passing had a devastating effect on me - and on Chris. The doctor put me on an anti- depressant medication and sleeping pills for my increasing insomnia. I also considered seeing a psychiatrist on a regular basis, but there was no one qualified for almost 50 miles around. Chris became slightly more hyperactive and his medication was increased. We continued to sleep together, to comfort each other and to ease the terrible pain were we both experiencing. Chris had viewed Wally as a big brother and was deeply attached to him. They had gone fishing together and even hunted some. Chris' schoolwork began to suffer because of the emotional trauma. I finally decided that the best thing for the two of us would be to get away from Shadow Springs, at least for the remainder of the winter. Chris could study (via computer) wherever we went. I planned on being home by the end of March. This would give us time to get The Victorian Crown fully operational for its first full season as a bed and breakfast. Cara and Hart were in agreement. Lily and Avi wanted to come with us, but Cara knew that Chris and I had to be alone together. I re-outfitted my big SUV with various luxury appointments (TV, futon, portable stove, etc.) and on the Saturday after Thanksgiving the two of us set out for sunshine, warmer climes and maybe even some tranquility. We hoped to find a reason; we hoped to understand why Wally had been taken from us. We were two people who needed to find the inner strength and serenity that comes with the acceptance of loss. Chris and I needed, above all, to find the ability to grow with our love. The afternoon of the day before we left, we gathered for small family ceremony in the gardens behind the house - the gardens that my beloved Wally had adored so much. Of course, nothing was in bloom; nothing was growing. Everything was bare and brown and dormant, awaiting the rebirth that comes with spring. Chris and I carefully spread Wally's ashes around the rose bushes, the azaleas and the hydrangeas. All was done in total silence. That silence was punctuated only by the occasional noise of the birds, busily eating from the feeders that Wally had insisted we install, and the distant sounds of children playing. The End This is the last chapter of "A Victorian Romance". However, the author reserves the right to continue the story at a future time. Thank you for your time and I hope you have enjoyed this tale. I appreciate anything that you, the readers, have to say. Please e-mail any comments to: rjcutter57@yahoo.com