Date: Mon, 21 May 2001 13:32:52 -0500 From: fsw99 Subject: Chapter 10 of You Can't Go Back Legal Notice: The following story contains descriptions of graphic sexual acts. Don't read this story if: **You're not 18 or over, **If it is illegal to read this type of material where you live, **Or if you don't want to read about gay/bi people in love or having sex. The author retains copyright to this story. Placing this story on a website or reproducing this story for distribution without the author's permission is a violation of that copyright. Legal action will be taken against violators. E-mail responses to the stories, story suggestions or other 'constructive' comments or advice may be sent to: stan992001@hotmail.com. All e-mails will be answered. You Can't Go Back By Stan (First, this is a true story as told to me by Dave. Dave was 12 when this happened, so he doesn't remember all of the events, so I have to make up some things. I will keep it as close to truth as I can. This happened almost ten years ago, but it will be told in flashbacks and mingled in with true events that happen to our group of young gay guys (and one old gay guy, me). Or, things that have already happened that we are still dealing with. I hope you enjoy this method of telling a story. I've never tried anything like this before. If you are looking for lots of sex in the story, better look elsewhere. This is more real life stuff. Sorry! If you are curious about our group, we have our own web site. It is at www.gayfreezone.homestead.com. Feel free to check us out. If you are a young gay guy with problems, we are still accepting new members.) Chapter Ten I just finished talking to Mathieu on ICQ. Stan and I haven't exactly given any happy stories about coming out to others so far. Mathieu is very happy now. And I think that deserves writing about. Mathieu is 21 now, I think. Hard to keep up with birthdays. He lives in Canada. He really fell in love with his cousin, who was 16 when Mathieu joined us. They were very close, and spent lots of nights together. Separate twin beds, but very close together. Mathieu wanted to tell his cousin that he was gay, but was scared to do so. Stan basically told him the same thing he told Ric. Make sure of his views on gays before you do so. He was very cautious, maybe too cautious. It took him months before he ever got up enough courage to do so. But he finally did tell him, and his cousin was very supportive. Mathieu is glad now he told him, and it has taken a huge load off his back. One good thing and one not so good thing also happened lately. Matt and Jamie broke up. Stan had told you about them being net boyfriends at the end of ‘Dear Diary'. But now Jamie and Mathieu have become net boyfriends, and are both really happy about it. Stan keeps joking that he has created and gay dating service for young guys, kind of like Matt did in ‘Dear Diary'. Oh well, as long as the guys are happy together, I guess. Anyway, back to Bruce and I. **************************************** Bruce and I had it made for the next year and a half. Our families liked each other. Each family enjoyed us being together. They both joked that we were less trouble together than if they had to deal with us separately. We got to spend the night at each other's house so much that we just started alternating. It was amazing. The parents seemed to like the arrangement, and we sure did too. We only had one bad time, and I have to tell about this. I've written so much about me being scared about being spanked, I can't leave this out. We both got it. Together. One time. And it hurt just as much as I'd feared. Well, there is no way for me to tell you we didn't deserve it this time. We did. Was it worth it? Yeah, I think so. It's one of the fondest memories I have with Bruce. No, not the spanking. What led up to it. We had gotten to a point where we didn't even have to say anything. If one left himself vulnerable with something he said or did and the other could make a smart comment, all he had to do was smile slyly at the other one and he knew what could have been coming, but we quit picking at each other that way. We would just smile sweetly, and the other would think of all the possible comebacks that could have been said, if we were still doing that kind of thing to each other. It worked out well. We could even do it in school. If anything, it drove the point across better. We were a team. We were one unit. We loved each other, and we both knew it. Well, one day, we were at his house. In the barn, doing my favorite chore. Cleaning out the stables. We both had a pitchfork and were scooping up the unlimited amount of shit the horses seem to create all the time. I had one piece that was caught on one of the blades and tried to flick it off into the wheelbarrow. I missed, and it hit Bruce on his left cheek. Face cheek. "I can't believe you did that," Bruce said, as he flicked some my way, hitting me on the leg. "I didn't do it on purpose, shit head," I said, as I sent some his way. This started a war. We were both howling with laughter as we pitched shit back and forth, getting it everywhere. On the rails of the stalls, in the hay that was outside the stalls, lots of places where it didn't belong. Oh, and all over us. We might have gotten away with it if Bruce's Dad hadn't heard all the loud laughter when he drove up and got out of his truck and decided to come in and check on us. "WHAT THE HELL DO YOU BOYS THINK YOU'RE DOING?" he screamed. That startled both of us. Neither of us had seen him come in, or even knew he was home. "Dad, uh, well, we had a little accident," Bruce stammered. "Well, you're about to have another accident that you weren't planning on." He walked quickly over and pulled both of us over to the first railing of the first stall. "You boys are supposed to be working and you've caused more work that still has to be done than what you started with. Pull down the jeans and underwear and grab the middle rail," he demanded, as he took off his belt. Bruce knew it was no use in arguing and he quickly did as he was told. I looked over at Bruce with fear showing in my eyes, and he whispered, "Better do like he says." "You too, Dave. If I have to do it for you, you get five extra swats. We told you along time ago that you would be punished just like Bruce was if you needed it. And this time, you both deserve it. Do it NOW!!" What choice did I have? Bruce had told me what a bad temper his Dad had, and I sure didn't want him any madder than he was right now. I pulled them down and grabbed the rail like Bruce had. He pulled the shirt tails of both our shirts high up our backs, then stepped back and let the first swing fly. I saw Bruce flinch and grimace, but he didn't yell out. Would he finish with Bruce first, then start in on me? I didn't have to wait long to find out, as the next swing was directed at my butt, not Bruce's. "OW!" I screamed. We were both crying before it was over. I think I was after the first couple of hits. Bruce took it much better. He waited until the spanking was over half over before I heard the first sobs from him. Well, I think that's what I heard. I think I was crying too loud myself to know for sure. I don't know how many we both got. 15 or 20, I guess. Lots more than I had wanted, I know that for sure. But he finally stopped. "You boys take a few minutes to pull yourselves back together, then get back to work. I'll be back in a few minutes to check on you. Clean all the shit off the stalls, too, or I might have to do this again." He walked off and we turned to watch him leave. I walked quickly over to Bruce and hugged him. I was still crying pretty hard. Bruce had almost stopped. He held me for a short time, then said, "We'd better get dressed and get back to work. Only one time in my life did he give me a spanking twice in one day and if you think the first one hurts, you won't believe what another one feels like when your butt is still sore from the first one." "I guess you're right," I said, as I bent down and pulled up my jeans and underwear. Bruce did the same, and we hurried back to our chores. Bruce's Dad didn't come back for a long time, and we were almost finished when he finally did walk back in. He was carrying a fresh pair of pants and shirt for each of us. "Now, that looks a lot better. Go ahead and finish and then change into these." We hurriedly finished up and dumped the last load into the pile in front of the tractor. We sprayed out the wheelbarrow and then came back in the barn. "Sorry, Dad. I guess we just lost our heads," Bruce said as we entered. "That's Ok. I was a boy once myself. Here. I don't think you want to walk into your Mom's house looking like that. And wash off the shit before you dump them in the dirty clothes, Ok?" He answered, as he handed us our clothes. Bruce didn't hesitate, he just kicked off his shoes and started stripping right in front of his father. What the Hell, he had just whipped my naked butt and had seen me in nothing but my underwear so many times I couldn't count them. I did the same. Bruce's Dad just stood there and watched us. "You know I didn't like doing that, don't you, boys?" Bruce looked up at him. "Yeah, I know, Dad. We're both sorry it happened." "The spanking or the shit fight?" he Dad asked, laughing. "Both, I guess. But the spanking a lot more." Bruce's Dad laughed heartily at that. "I can remember my old man tanning my hide so many times I have no idea how many. I never seemed to learn. Dave, I had three brothers, two older and one younger. We were all pretty close in age, and were always getting into fights or mischief. We would always blame the others. He got to a point where if one brother was in trouble, we would all get it. He couldn't be sure who started the trouble and who contributed, so he would just spank us all. And he would make us all strip completely naked first and stand at attention until he would call us over and make us lie down on his lap. At least I didn't do that, did I?" "No, thank God," I answered. He and Bruce both laughed at that. "But he would always do one other thing afterwards, and I think I always loved him more for that than anything. He would always make us stand in the corner for 30 minutes after our spankings, still naked. But then he would have each of us come over and he would hug us and tell us he loved us and wanted us all to be better boys from then on so he wouldn't have to do that again. Come here, both of you." We walked over and he hugged both of us to him. The top of our heads didn't even reach his chin. "I do love you boys. Both of you. Dave, you've definitely become part of our family, more so than ever now, I guess. And I'm glad. It's good to have another son." "Thanks," I answered. "I love you, Dad," Bruce said, hugging him back. "Me too," I added. He pulled us both back from him but kept a hand on our shoulders. "I don't want to ever have to do that again. You guys don't either, do you?" "I sure as Hell don't," I answered. Then, I realized what I had just said, and put both hands over my mouth. Bruce almost fell down, he was laughing so hard. His Dad just stared at me with his mouth open. Oh, shit! Now I was really in for it! I had never sworn in front of an adult in my life. But then Bruce's Dad also started laughing. "What happened to the shy little boy that first came over here and wouldn't hardly say anything to us?" he asked. "I think he's long gone, Dad. I know how you feel about swearing. I think Dave needs a few more swats to his butt for that. Here, I'll take down his pants for you." "Bruce, NO!" I said, as I dodged out of his way. Bruce actually did fall down on the floor this time, as he laughed until he started to cough. Bruce's Dad started to laugh really hard too, and I finally knew they were kidding me. "Bruce, you're getting your nice clean clothes all dirty. I think he deserves to be punished for that, don't you Mr. Walker?" "I think you're right, Dave. What do you think? Completely naked like I used to get it?" "Yes sir. I think that would be the right way," I answered, also starting to laugh. "But, I try to be fair, and you did swear in front of me, which is at least as serious as getting fresh clothes dirty, don't you think?" "Uh, well..." "You're right Dad. I think both of us need another lesson to make sure that we'll be good in the future," Bruce added, continuing to laugh. "Come on Dave, let's both get naked," he said, as he started to unbuckle his belt. I just looked wide eyed from one to the other. Bruce opened up his pants to where his boxers were showing, and then couldn't take it any more. He broke up in laughter once again. So did his Dad. Ok, they were kidding me again. I joined them in their laughter. "Uh, I'm sorry about what slipped out of my mouth, Mr. Walker," I finally said as I walked closer. I'd walk closer now that I knew I wasn't getting another spanking. That's fine, Dave, we all slip up occasionally. Let's just keep this between us men, though, Ok? The spanking too. Nobody needs to know about this but the three of us." I smiled at him. "Thanks. I feel the same way." "Dad, can I ask you something?" Bruce asked. "Sure. You know you can." "Well, you said you loved both of us. Dave spends lots of time over here. I was just wondering if we could trade Mitch for Dave and then he could stay over here all of the time." Bruce's father laughed. "That might be a good trade for us. I think I could get Dave to work lots harder than I can get Mitch to work. Do you think they will make it an even swap?" "I don't know. I think we might have to throw in something. Maybe a hog or two," Bruce said, as he laughed hard. "Yeah. And some chickens, too," I added, joining them in laughter. "But I like that idea. Your wife cooks lots better than my Mom. Don't tell I said that, though." "I'll guarantee you that I won't ever bring that up, Dave. A man knows when to speak and when to shut up and that's not something that will ever come out of my mouth, I guarantee you. Nothing good could ever come of it. And lots of bad stuff might," he laughed. "So, when can I move in?" I asked, kidding. "Well, I'm afraid that my wife has kind of got attached to Mitch. I don't think she'll give him up. You seem to be about half way moved in now. Maybe we should just keep it the way it is." "Yeah, I guess that would be the best thing to do. At least I get to eat good half the time." Everyone laughed at that comment. Me too. We walked towards the house with his arm around both of our shoulders. After he had supervised us washing off our other clothes and wringing them out, of course. Did he tell his wife about the spanking? I'm sure he did. She never mentioned it, though. No rubbing it in. She never even asked us why we had wet clothes that we were bringing inside. And I'm pretty sure he wouldn't have a clue where to get clothes for both of us out of Bruce's room anyway. I was happy here. Would I come to live here full time, like we had joked about? No way. I loved my parents, and didn't really want to leave them, no matter how much better a cook Bruce's Mom was. But they were now my second family, and I was closer to them than anybody on the earth except for Bruce and my parents. I loved them and they loved me and nothing could ever change that. At least I thought so. Looking back, it was only about a month before Bruce's 14th birthday from that day. It's amazing how much changed in such a short amount of time. To be continued. Comments are appreciated and always answered. Comments can be sent to stan992001@hotmail.com where all the guys can read them too.