This is something for those of us who grew up in the 90's. Or who enjoyed the 90's (No, Mickey Rorke, the 90's did not suck. Jerk.) so take it with that mindset. I'm not taking this story seriously, so you probably shouldn't either.

That saying, this is a non-sex story. Meaning there probably won't be any sex at all, all romance you see will be purely PG-13. The language won't be however. I don't have that much restraint.

So... if offensive language offends you or intimate contact between two males offends you then go away.

This program is not suitable for all audiences.

Throughout time, humans have always acclimated to whatever dire situation presented. When earth began to deteriorate from over-use of its resources, humans set off to find new places to settle in the universe. Some found new homes, some found death.

The rest of them?




Phase Two: Attraction! Bursting Chemistry!


"C'mon Lady, you can't just let us sit here until the air runs out. You at least need Pinocchio here alive if you want the money." Jiminy spoke into his communication device.

"Non, not ontil you apologize." A woman responded in a thick French accent.

"Aw, c'mon, you can't stay mad at me forever." Jiminy cooed.

"Vat vas zat? I zidn't hear you." She called mockingly.

"Alright-alright! Fine, I'm sorry for insulting your `fragrance'. It smelled very nice."

"And?" She egged on.

Jiminy let out a small sigh, and said unenthusiastically "You're the most prettiest and smartest girl this side of the galaxy." He looked to Pin and rolled his eyes.

"Very good. Okay, I vill pick you up soon."

Jiminy pressed a button on his comm.-device and tossed it aside.

He let out a breath with a dry laugh, "And people wonder why I hate women."

He stared at a wall nearby while Pin just sat across observing him. Jiminy shifted uncomfortably under his blank but curious gaze. Then Jiminy looked at him long and hard, trying to work up the right way to ask his question.

He couldn't, so he just asked, "What was that?"

"What was what?" Pin responded.

"That... thing. With the armor. It was like something out of Japan."

Pin crooked his head to the side, "Jah-Pan?"

Jiminy shook his head, "It's a place from..." He paused and cleared his throat, "Nevermind, there wasn't anything about what you did back there in our information. What was that armor thing you did?"

"I don't know." Pin stated simply. "I just... knew what to do. I was probably made to use it."

Jiminy gave him a half-smile, "I figured that much. I guess you were just following instinct, huh?"

Pin nodded.

Jiminy sighed and toyed with his blue ring, finding it could come of fairly easily. He brought it up to light and examined it. It had small green lines on the inside of the rings, they glowed with a soft light that faded in and out occasionally.

"I'm guessing I'm the only person who can wear this blue one now." Jiminy queried to Pin without looking at him.

"I suppose." He responded softly.

"I'll have Coligny take a look at it when she comes to get us."

The escape pod began to shake and convulse, making Pin and Jiminy lose their balance. Pin fell against the wall and Jiminy fell on his face. When the convulsing stopped, Jiminy propped himself on his elbows.

"Life lesson number one, Pinocchio: Women can't drive. At all."

And intercom on the pod beeped, "I heard zat!" Coligny snarled.

"Good." Jiminy quipped.

He got up and stumbled to the door and smacked the release switch. A door in front of him swung up. He looked over to Pin and pointed his head through the door. Pin got up and followed him out.

"Welcome to the Dampf, Pinocchio. It's a small ship, not for but a few passengers and some cargo. It's nice for getting around without much attention though."

Jiminy looked back and Pin and smirked. Pin gave him a curious look.

"C'mon! I'll give you the tour." Jiminy urged while grabbing Pin's hand.

"I would like to try something." The man in the hologram said.

The doors behind Dr. Gale opened, two guards were dragging in a small boy with tan skin. He had a sack as his only article of clothing and he was making futile attempts to break free from his captors. Dr. Gale looked at him with part skepticism and part empathy. She turned to the hologram.

"A child? You expect me to experiment on a child?" She crossed her arms and softly said, "You must be joking..."

The man leaned forward on his elbows and laced his fingers together.

"Dr. Gale, I'm afraid that children are the best subjects I can secure with the least amount of issues. Whatever sentimentalities you have will have to be put aside. Either that or we can just kill you and get someone without..."

The man stopped mid-sentence, peering over his hands at Gale who was staring at him with a defiant glare, her sharp features making it amusing for the man to look at. She looked down, her black hair falling around her face and started entering commands into the console. The large tube in the room began to descend, opening the platform. She looked up to him with the same stare, with just a hint of defeat in her green eyes.

The man leaned back. "Alright then." He looked towards the guards. "Put him in."

The guards dragged the boy in and tossed him into the tube. Dr. Gale pressed a button that made the tube ascend around the boy. He started screaming in a language no one in the room understood and was pounding against the glass.

The man looked to Gale, "What have you planned this time?" he asked.

Dr. Gale held up a test tube with a dark-metallic liquid. "I'm not sure." She said as she swished the around the liquid. "I suppose we'll find out."

She dropped the tube into the console, not long after a gas of the same color invaded the tube around the boy.

"And so we wait." The man said. "Keep me posted Gale."


The hologram disappeared and the guards left the lab. Dr. Gale looked down at her hands resting on the console and let out a sad sigh.

After staring at her hands a while longer she let out a breath and said, "Bloody hell."


The fruity smell of perfume could be practically seen seeping out of the double-doors to the bridge. Jiminy looked over to Pin and smirked. Pin just stared at him blankly, rubbing his hand against his thigh, trying to make the tingling sensation that had been there since Jiminy held it go away.

"Sorry if the clothes don't fit right." Jiminy said, "We'll get some that you won't completely tear apart from moving when we get to Erde."

Pin looked down at the t-shirt and pants Jiminy had lent him.

"They are tight." He said.

Jiminy chuckled and hit a panel near the door. They swung open with the expected `swoosh' noise. The fragrance became much stronger the moment the door opened and a light fog was shrouding the bridge.

Jiminy put a hand to his nose, "I fucking hate this shit. Gives me a headache."

Pin sniffed lightly, then immediately copied Jiminy's action.

"Too strong." Said Pin.

"Vat do you know?" A posh sounding voice uttered from the middle of the mist, "You men are ze same. Pigs."

Jiminy sighed and dryly said, "Well you're definitely one of a kind Coli."

"Vat ez zat supposed to mean?" She growled.

"Absolutely nothing Coli." Jiminy shrugged.

The two men moved into the middle of the bridge, Coligny was sitting in a chair filing her nails. Her thin ebony body contrasted by a very revealing white outfit and blonde hair. She looked up to Jiminy and let out a distasted grunt as he leaned against a nearby console. She looked at Pin and her eyes bugged out, she immediately stood up and walked over to him. Jiminy rolled his eyes and laughed at the frightened look Pin had suddenly adopted.

Coligny began to caress Pin's chest and said in a sultry voice, "No von told me you'd be so... How do you say Djiminy?"

"I don't think there's a term vulgar enough to describe how smokin' Pin is, Coli."

"I believe you!" She exclaimed in exaggeration, she then looked at Pin curiously, "Pin? Ez zat your name? Oh-no, no, no. Zat vill not do darling. Ez a silly name! Djiminy thought et up didn't he?"

"Nope," Jiminy said shaking his head, "He thought it up all by himself."

Pin nodded, with an innocent look of fear still on his face. "I like my name." he squeaked out.

"Oh vut darling, zere are so many better ones. How about Beau? Yez, I like that one. We will call you Beau."

Pin softly pushed her off him, "I like my name." he said a little firmer this time.

Coligny pouted and Pin's face grew more fearful, he looked to Jiminy as if asking to rescue him. Jiminy smiled and chuckled internally. He pushed himself off his perch and pulled Coligny away from Pin.

"Leave him alone." Jiminy said in a parental tone, "You're supposed to be taking us to Erde, not flirting with him. Besides," He said looking up at Pin, "We don't even know if he has a sex drive or anything like that." He looked down to Coligny and smirked, "And even if he does, I call dibs."

Coligny let out a frustrated grunt and stormed off back to her original seat. Jiminy laughed and looked up to Pin who shared a grateful look with him.

Jiminy leaned up to Pin and whispered, "Life lesson number two Pinocchio: Women are scary."

"Ve vill be zere momentarily boys." Coligny said in an agitated tone. She looked back at Jiminy and glared at him.

Jiminy stuck his tongue out at her and Pin laughed.


The small ship landed it its designated port. The three walked down the catwalk leading out into the large city. The city was spotted with a collection of various types of architecture mostly buildings left over from the original colonization that look older, and a little more crude, while there was a large collection of modern skyscrapers that towered over everything.

As the three reached the bottom of the steps to the docking station, Coligny turned to the boys.

"I'm going to go get a hold of ze contact Djiminy. Don't get in too much trouble."

"Scouts honor!" Jiminy said happily, holding his hand up.

Coligny rolled her eyes and strolled off.

Pin looked to Jiminy and asked, "What's a scout?"

Jiminy shrugged, "Hell if I know. Let's get you some clothes."


"So where did you send It?" The man in the hologram asked.

"Erde. I traced the potential escape points for their pod and it was the most likely place that they would have headed." Dr. Gale pushed her hair behind her ear. "We should get some interesting results."

"Hmm, yes. By the way, what are they doing up there?" The man nodded behind Gale.

Dr. Gale turned around and smirked at the guards that were stuck to the wall.

"Those two were drawn to each other, It just happened to take it literally."


Jiminy dragged Pin into the clothing store by the hand. Pin was still perplexed by the strange sensation Jiminy sent through his arm. It didn't feel bad by any means, so he just let it go. Jiminy took the first shirt he found on the rack and brought it up to Pin.

"How about this." He held up the shirt, but stopped when he saw how small it looked. He reached for the tag and saw the large red L printed on the inside and then looked up. Pin stared at Jiminy and smiled warmly at him. Jiminy averted his gaze, feeling warmth creep up his body.

"You need a bigger size." Jiminy said.

"What's that?" Pin asked, pointing to Jiminy's face.


"Your face is all red. What is that? Are you ill?"

"Wha-? No, Pinocchio, it means..." Jiminy averted his eyes again and sighed. "It means I'm doing something I shouldn't."

"What is it?"

Jiminy opened his mouth to answer but no sound came out. Thinking quickly he grabbed the nearest articles of clothing and shoved them in Pin's hands. The turned him around and shoved him in the direction of the dressing rooms.

"Go in there and try those on."

Pin looked back at Jiminy as he continued to push him, "Okay, can you come in with me?"

Jiminy looked up at him and began to turn red again. He shook his head.

Pin looked at him with concern. "Are you sure you're not ill?" He stopped in his tracks, effortlessly becoming a brick wall for Jiminy as he crashed into Pin's back. Pin turned around like he didn't feel anything. He felt Jiminy's forehead and began poking and prodding him.

"You're my only friend. I don't want anything bad to happen to you."

Jiminy's face just kept getting redder and it felt like he had this little weighty orb stuck in his stomach. It wasn't a bad feeling. But it made him feel strange. He wanted it to stop, so he just kept trying to shove Pin into the dressing room.

"I'll be fine, just get in there." Jiminy muttered.


Jiminy eventually went into the room and closed the door behind him. Jiminy sighed and looked to his right to see the store clerk looking at him strangely. Jiminy got red from frustration rather than hormones this time though.

"What, never seen an artificial human before?" He growled while grabbing a shirt. He stormed into the other dressing room.

Jiminy sat down and tossed the shirt on the floor. He leaned forward and put his head in his hands and let out a frustrated growl.

`What the fuck am I doing?' He thought to himself. `He's not real, calm down and stop acting like a girl.'

Jiminy brought up his head and stared at his hands. He looked at his blue ring and noticed it was glowing. Jiminy stared at it oddly, got up and exited the dressing room.

"Hey Pin, my weird ring is..." He looked to see his room was empty, "glowing..." He looked around and saw the clerk standing by the door with her arms crossed.

"He ran out of here. With the clothes he was trying on. He's your boyfriend, you're going to pay. Right?"

Jiminy sighed. "So not groovy..." He looked up to the store clerk. "Did he at least look good in them?"

"That boy doesn't need clothes to look good. In fact I think we'd be better off if he ran around naked." She held out her hand motioning for Jiminy to pay.

Jiminy shook his head and laughed as he took out his wallet and handed the girl money.

"You're probably right. By the way, he's not my boyfriend."

"Mmhmm, that's ain't what he thinks I bet."

"He's not real. He probably doesn't even have a sex drive."

"But he be lookin' at you-"

"Oh shut up," Jiminy interrupted, "which way did he go?"

The girl unfolded her arms and gave Jiminy a sassy look while she put one arm on her hip and used the other to point in the direction Pin went. Jiminy ran out of the store and down the alley.


Pin stormed down the street, following the large metal objects being carried through the air. The eye of the happenings was coming from a large city square. Tons of metallic objects were floating around in the air, circling around a lone figure in the middle. It was disfigured to a high degree, most of its body make of spikes of a dark lead color. It had no face like the last creature. It looked only vaguely human.

It was instinct.

Pin swung his arm behind him then quickly over his head, bringing his hand down in front of him, cupping it at his waist. His ring glowed a molten orange and a ring of fire surrounded his waist. After a few seconds the flames extinguished leaving a belt around Pin's waist. He was holding the square buckle in his hand, his ring touching an emblem that looked like the sun.

"Acclimate!" He shouted.

Pin dragged the ring up the emblem creating sparks, the sparks trailed with the ring until his hand was above his head, a flame ignited in his palm.

Pin closed his fist on the fire; the next instant his entire body was engulfed in flame. The flames on his body separated and fizzled out, leaving Pin standing transformed into his armor.

The creature had turned around, noticing Pin. It flung its arm out, sending several objects into Pin's trajectory. Pin opened and closed his fists, causing them to ignite with flames. He punched each object, they exploded on contact, with shrapnel and debris falling behind him.

Pin ran towards the monster, which kept throwing things at him to slow him down. Pin kept destroying everything that was thrown at him, but it kept him from getting any closer. The creature somehow kept throwing tearing things from the ground and making it just fly to Pin without even touching it. He could only stand his ground and keep destroying the objects.

Jiminy ran through the alleyway, following the sounds of the commotion going on in the city square. He ran out into the square to find Pin in his armor again, smashing objects this large... mound of lead was tossing at it him with some sort of force. Jiminy began to run forward, but tripped on a planter. His gun fell out of his pocket, but it didn't fall to the ground. It just... hovered there. The wires connected in Jiminy's head.

"It's a magnet..." He muttered.

He reached down and grabbed his gun and took aim at the monster. Across from him, Pin finally noticed who had ran up behind the creature. Something stirred in his chest, at the sight of Jiminy. He didn't want him here.

"Jiminy no!" Pin shouted.

Jiminy aimed carefully and pulled the trigger. Like he thought the bullet did nothing-but it got its attention. The monster turned around and let out a gargled noise in Jiminy's direction. Jiminy kept the monster in his sight.

"Come on..." he whispered.

The monster flung its hand in Jiminy's direction. His gun forcefully flew out of his hand and into the air and pointed back at him. The trigger began to twitch, Jiminy stared in fear.

"Jiminy get out of here!" Pin continued to yell. His feet felt planted, he was... scared of what might happen to him. Jiminy just stared at the trigger that continued to twitch.

"Oh shit." Jiminy said wide-eyed before the gun went off and shot him, sending him flying face-down onto the ground.

"Jiminy!!" Pin yelled.

His feet began to move on their own, a feral roar built in his chest and belted out of him and he charge at the monster. His armor began to radiate an orange light that swelled and grew the louder his roar became and the closer he got to the monster. He flung out his fist and collided with the monsters torso, and within a split second the entire plaza was engulfed into a giant fireball.

The fire died down, Pin stood in the center hunched over and breathing heavily. The smoking crater was all that was left from the plaza. The creature lied a few feet away from Pin, smoldering and making a strangled coughing noise. The creature soon got up and stared at Pin. Both were breathing in time with one another. The creature flung its arms towards Pin, but nothing happened. The creature brought its arm up and let out a confused noise.

Pin took this as his chance. He brought his hand to his buckle and grabbed it; he twisted it clockwise, and turned it into a diamond shape. The buckle started beeping, growing progressively faster in repetition and higher in pitch. Pin let out another roar and ran towards the monster. His body burst into flames as he got closer. When he was close enough he jumped into the air, twisting his body and extending his leg to kick the creature. Pin and the creature exploded on contact, sending another blast of fire into the air.

When the flames died, all that remained was Pin on his hands and knees with the ashes of his armor dissolving into the air. His breathing was labored, but that didn't stop him from rushing to Jiminy who remained still on the ground. Pin put Jiminy on his back and put his head on his thigh.

"J-Jiminy?" He sputtered.

Jiminy quietly moaned and squirmed slightly against Pin's thigh.

"Jiminy?" He quietly asked again.

"Mm, five more minutes Lucas." Jiminy muttered.

"Jiminy." Pin said, while lightly pushing his shoulder.

Jiminy moaned again and slowly opened his eyes. He stared straight up at Pin, directly into his eyes.

"You're naked." Jiminy eventually said. He blinked twice before saying, "Far out."

Pin let out a small laugh.

"I'm sorry I couldn't protect you." Jiminy said, "It's my fault you got hurt."

"I'm the one who shot the damn thing. I wasn't expecting it to use my gun against me."

"You still got hurt. I feel like it's my fault."

"That's stupid Pinocchio. I'll be fine, it just hit my shoulder, this isn't the first time I've been shot. Besides, you did what I wanted you to do. That thing was a magnet. The heat from that groovy fire explosion thing canceled out its magnetism."

"Oh..." He stated plainly. "When-when your gun was pointed at you... I felt something in my chest. I don't know what it was, but I wanted to run over to you and..."

"Take the shot for me?" Jiminy finished for him slowly.

Pin nodded. "I want... I want to protect you for some reason." He paused, staring at Jiminy. "Only you. I only feel that way with you."

Jiminy chuckled and brought his hand up to cup Pin's face, "You remind me a lot of a guy I used to know." He let his hand drop, and then let his head fall to the side, right into Pin's crotch. "Whoa, hi there! Damn man, now you really remind me of this guy I knew."

Jiminy looked up to Pin again. "We're gonna have to get you a lot more clothes if you're gonna keep burning them up Pinocchio."

Pin just smiled at Jiminy and helped him up.


"I got good news and bad news. Vell ez good news for you. Ez all bad for me."

"Just spit it out Coli." Jiminy spat impatiently on the medical table in the Dampf's infirmary.

"Ze good news ez you're going to live. Ze bullet wound ez nothing serious."

"What's ze bad news mon cheri?" Jiminy asked, in a mocking imitation.

Coligny smacked Jiminy on his bad shoulder.

"Ow!" Jiminy cried out.

"Hey!" Pin yelled out from across the room. He came over and grabbed Coligny by the hips and placed her away from Jiminy. "Leave him alone." He said fever.

Both Jiminy and Coligny looked at Pin oddly, but said nothing. Pin stood between the two with his arms folded facing Coligny. Jiminy peered from behind his back and shared a look with Coligny.

"... Anyway. What's the bad news Coli?" Jiminy asked.

"Öde... Ez vere ze drop-off ez."

Jiminy leaned back on the table and let out a long exasperated breath.

"Fuck man, that's heavy." He said.

"Öde?" Pin asked leaning back.

Jiminy sat up, "It's not the most mellow star-system ever. But it's the only place where we can get away with our uh... line of work without the fuzz getting in the way."

"Et doesn't matter. Ve have to go. Vut if we keep running into those... creatures, et might take longer zen expected. Djiminy, you said you have ze same ring, non?"

"Oh, yeah, I do. You wanna take a look at it?" Jiminy took off his ring and handed it to Coligny.

"Oui. Ef we can make use of et, and have two of those suits, zen it might be better."

Pin let out a grunt of distaste.

Jiminy and Coligny looked up to Pin with the same look from a few minutes ago.

"I... I don't want Jiminy to get hurt." Pin said softly while lowering his head.

"Ve don't even know ef et vill work for him mon beau. Let's look at it first."

"And even if it does, it's up to me if I want to use it or not." Jiminy added sternly. "And if it does, it just gives you a better opportunity to protect me, right? You'll always know where I am after all." He offered with a soft smile. "Is that okay Pinocchio?"

Pin looked to Jiminy and nodded with the concerned look he's had since after the battle.

"Okay..." He said.

But he didn't seem to happy about it.

"P-pinocchio?! I knew you had a part in zat silly name Djiminy!" Coligny spat. She began to strut over to Jiminy again.

Pin stood in her path again, looking down on her with a stern look with his arms folded. Coligny looked up surprised and slightly afraid.

"I like my name." Pin stated

Coligny gulped and backed away, Jiminy just lied down on the table and laughed.


So yeah, it took me this long to realize I totally didn't tell you guys who wrote this gem (or garbage depending on what you think of it). So here's my email, tell me what you think