Date: Wed, 13 Oct 2004 16:12:04 +0000 From: Douglas DD DD Subject: The Boys of Lady Lex Chapter 28 Welcome back for another chapter. Of course you've all been wondering what Douglas's decision was going to be. The decision will reveal a lot about Douglas. What Douglas sees will also profoundly affect Ben. Ben left with with a dilemma. I hope I battled out of it okay. Read and enjoy. The Boys of the Lady Lex Chapter 28 "Redemption" Written By Douglas DD and Benjamin TC Earth Ben's fate was in Douglas's hands. If he walks over and opens the door, Kiran lives and Ben's life goes on as normal. If he leaves the door closed he will always have the memory of Ben in his heart. He had no idea how he got sent to the past, or even if he would be returned to his present. What if I never go back to the Lady Lex, he thought. What would be my best decision then, because who is to say I'm even going back. Thinking about it in those terms, there was no doubt in his mind what his decision was going to be. Ben had been unhappy for over a week. He had nightmares. He had been unfairly convicted in what was obviously the accidental death of his friend. Ben had given up and Douglas very simply couldn't stand to see his love like that. He needed to act, and act quickly. He left the protection of the trees he had been hiding behind and headed for the door. His decision had been made. Kiran would live and Ben would be free. The "Wonder Boy" Everything in the "Wonder Boy" looked normal, except that Douglas was gone. Ben felt momentary panic. Somehow all the shimmering and distortion he had seen had taken Douglas from him. He looked out of the view screen and once again saw the stars distort followed by what looked like the outline of a starship, but the vision was so fast he couldn't swear that was what he had seen. He walked over to the control panel to pick up the commlink and call the bridge when he became distracted by someone coming through the hatch of the "Wonder Boy". "Andrew?" "No. It's Trev." "What are you doing here, Trev?" "I'm your other twin brother, remember?" Ben felt a jolt of guilt. Andrew had been the one to get his attention over Trev almost from the moment the dead body of Kiran had been found. Trevor had been the distant one, the cool one, the one who didn't need anybody. On the Lady Lex it as almost as if they didn't know each other as Trev maintained his distance, and even when he did make contact with Ben, it was still as if he was a stranger saying hello. Andrew had been the open emotional one, and was also the one who had recovered from the shock and grief of Kiran's death better than any of them. Andrew had found himself a friend, no a Boyfriend, quickly and had adjusted to life on the Lady Lex better than either he or Trevor had. Ben knew that without Douglas he would have been lost long ago. "Sorry, Trev. I'm really truly sorry." Trev sat on the two person seat Ben and Douglas had put together, but said nothing. Ben picked up the phone again and called the bridge. Ian Brothers, who was on duty as cadet communications officer answered. "Bridge." "This is Ben. I need to talk to an officer." "They're busy." "This is an emergency." "They're busy with an emergency. Do you want to talk to Mike?" "I'll talk to anybody as long as it's now!" Mike came on the line and asked Ben what the problem was. Ben told him Douglas had disappeared into some kind of distortion. "Shit. Okay, we're having all kinds of problems here. I'll give this to Captain Storm. I'll get back to you as quick as I can.' "Damn it, Mike, Douglas has disappeared! Don't put me in some fucking line! I need to talk to somebody now!" "I'll do what I can, Ben," Mike said calmly. "This is all pretty scary. I'll do what I can." Ben clicked off the comm, not at all happy with how things were playing out. What had happened to Douglas? Did anybody on the bridge even care? What were all those distortions? He didn't like the fact that Douglas's disappearance had just been something that was put on somebody's list. He turned to Trevor, who looked as lonely and lost as he'd ever seen him. "What can I do for you, Trev?" Ben sad next to him. Trev edged away from him, making sure they didn't touch. "Nothing." "Must be something or you wouldn't have come here," "You're too worried about Douglas to talk to me." Ben reached out to give Trev a hug, but Trev pulled back even more. "I always have time for you, Trev." "That's a lie. You don't even like me." "I love you, Trev. You're my brother." "You said that before and it didn't mean nothing then. I asked why you didn't like me and you just said I love you Trev. It's all bullshit." Ben sat next to Trevor, staring out into space, wondering what was going on. Wondering why he couldn't shake Kiran out of his head. Wondering why he had dragged Douglas into here for a week when Douglas should have been doing his job. Wondering why he was always so damned selfish. Wondering where Douglas had gone. Wondering why Trev though he didn't like him and wondering why life was so damned fucked up! "You can't answer me can you?" Ben was still silent. Trev started to get up. "I better go. I know I'm not wanted here." Ben looked at Trev, his eyes pleading. "Don't go Trev. I want you to stay." Trev sat. He started fighting tears, tears he did not want his big brother to see, the same kind of tears he could see his big brother fighting for the same reason - that he didn't want his brother to see him vulnerable. "Why aren't you on the bridge?" Trev asked. "I don't deserve to be. I was responsible for letting an innocent boy die." Trev then wandered up a path Douglas hadn't taken, because Douglas was still young and naive enough to think that love meant doing everything he could to keep his lover happy, even if it meant nurturing his lover's unhappiness. But Trevor had an ornery streak in him, and that, coupled with the deep love he had for his brother that he couldn't admit to himself and a quick temper that often got him shooting at the mouth, sent him up the different path. "That is bullshit! That is so much bullshit! It wasn't our fault I don't care what all those courts say! We never meant to hurt him! You gonna just spend the rest of your life here feeling sorry for yourself! Just sit on your ass thinking how shitty it all is?" Ben could feel his own temper rising. Trev had no business talking to him like that. Trev hadn't said ten words to him in the last month, and now he was telling him how he was supposed to think. "It's not like that," Ben said defensively. "Yes it is. Kiran was my bestest friend in the world. I love him. He was taken from me and now I'm here but I'm not sitting on my ass doing nothing for the rest of my life. I'm the Hawke. Kiran's gonna live in the Hawke because the Hawke is awesome. And what are you? You're just a crybaby sitting with your boyfriend who lets you do what you want so you can feel sorry for yourself until you die." "You never cried when Kiran died. Andrew and I did." "Big fucking deal! I didn't cry. I got mad. I got pissed. I don't have to cry. I don't have to cry. I don't, I don't, I don't." "Yes, you do." Trev took a deep breath, but he couldn't start the tears from trickling down his cheeks. "I did cry. I cried with, with," he took another breath," with somebody I want to be like." "Who?" "I can't say. Now I want to cry with somebody I love." "Who would that be?" "You." Trev buried his head into Ben's chest, and for the second time let the sobs come out, hard, uncontrolled, full of emotion, guilt, and even love. Ben held his brother tightly to his chest. Trevor, who seemed so above it all, yet was so vulnerable. He let Trevor's tears dampen his shirt as his own tears fell on his brother's head. He fought back a sob and said, "Do you know why I like you, Trevor?" "You don't like me. You don't even like yourself!" His body shook with emotion. "Yes, I do. You know why?" "Why?" "Because you love me enough to tell me what I needed to hear, even if I wasn't going to like it. You love me enough to love me even when I treat you like you're not even my brother." Then Trev's words came back to him, lighting up his brain. "You don't even like yourself." "Trev, I like you because you like, no make that you love, me, even when I don't love myself. You love me, Douglas loves me. Andrew loves me. Maybe it's time I started liking and loving me again." "You do like me?" Trev asked. "I like you. I love you. Kiran's gone. He's dead. Maybe it's time for some of us to live." He kissed Trevor on the forehead, looking at his tear stained face. "Thanks, brother." "For what?" "For being my brother. For being my friend. Let's see if we can help bring Douglas back." "How?" "I have an idea. I don't know anything about what happened, but I do know this. We can't bring him back by leaving the spot where he disappeared. We have to go back." The boys cleaned their tear-streaked faces. Ben straightened his uniform. There were some things he needed to take care of. Starting with his uncle. He wondered if he would be welcomed on the bridge. The "Orion" "It's not that far away, Richie," Todd said as he sat in the chair in front of the metal desk that occupied most of Rich's office. As cadet CO he got an office, a desk, and a cadet to help him with his paperwork. "Quit calling me Richie." "You used to love it when I called you Richie. You loved it when I used to fuck you, to dominate you. You couldn't get enough of my calling out Richie as I to make you scream by fucking you so hard. You loved having me humiliate you, having me top you in every way imaginable." Todd gave Rich a leer and continued, with a fake note of sadness to his voice. "And now you say I can't call you Richie?" "Shut up." "The job's really gotten to you, hasn't it? You used to be so pleasant to be around. I used to love you, Richie. Hell, in some deep down way I still do love you." "I don't want to talk about this. Get down to business or get out, Todd." "When's the last time you had sex, Richie? Was it the last time with me? When was that? Right at the start of our junior year before you decided you were going to be an ambitious puke and be the CO instead of me? So you could show me who the dominate one really was? Is that the last time Richie? Because if that's true, it's been a long long time." "Knock it off." "Still the same old Richie, aren't you? Still wanting to be dominated by me, even if it's in your own office and you don't have the cajones to kick my ass out." "I've been busy. I don't have time for sex." Todd leaned over the desk. "Tell me Richie, do you think of me when you jerk off? Do you think of me tying you up and fucking your brains out? Do you? Admit it, Richie." "Look, Todd, those days are over. The only reason I haven't' kicked you out is that we have work to do." "Uh huh. Whatever you say, Richie. But you know what? Just like it's always been between us. You got to kiss ass and get what you want. And I end up with all the power. Interesting how that works isn't it." "I'm tired of your act, Todd. I used to love it. It's not that way anymore." "If you ever want reminding of how it used to be, you know where my cabin is." On junior academy ships the CO and the XO had their own cabins. Captain Hatcher wasn't yet ready to accord that privilege to Johnny and Mike on the Lady Lex. "Look, let's just get down to business, okay?" Todd grinned that infuriating grin that Rich both hated and loved at the same time. That grin that said, I gotcha. "Like I said, it's only a few more days until we have our practice round against the Lady Lex." "We were lucky to draw her. She's weak. They're not a team. This will be a cakewalk for us. It's a ship of losers." "They handled the little initiation you planned pretty well." Rich had been the CO in charge of the invasion of the Lady Lex. "This will be a big confidence builder, Todd. We're in a situation where we can't lose." "I agree that we'll probably kick their ass. But our ships do have something in common." "What's that?" "We've never competed as a ship in Olympic type competition." "So? The `Orion' is the best of the best. The `Lexington' is made up of losers who have never won at anything and never will." "Think about this, Richie." Rich winced once again as he heard the familiar name he had only let Todd use. "You know we're going to kick their ass. I know we're going to kick their ass. Everybody on the `Orion" knows we'll kick their ass. Hell, every junior academy ship in the fleet knows it, including the Lady Lex herself, knows the Lady Lex is going to get her ass kicked." "Then I don't see what the problem is, Todd." "The problem is this Richie, the CO who is so caught up in success and kissing ass he doesn't know where his dick is hanging, when that competition is done we're going to think our shit doesn't stink. And they're going to be just good enough and motivated enough that they will actually think they can compete three months down the line." "Even with three more months they haven't had the years of training most of us have had. Even the new upper level students like Mark Hatcher have had a lot of the training we got in the junior academy. Three months of training won't defeat years of training." "You missed one of my key words, Richie." "That word being...?" "Motivation. We, meaning all of the junior academy ships, have everything to lose and little to gain by beating up on the Lady Lex. They have nothing to lose and everything to gain by beating us. My point is let's hope we kick ass but remember we could end up getting bitten in the ass later. Maybe we don't want to show them out best. Kind of hide our hand. Let them think they're better than they are. Then show our hand come the Olympics." "I don't agree. What we want to do is humiliate them. Rub their noses in who they are. Knock them down and don't let them back up. Make them so afraid of the Olympics, they won't even want to show up." "You're wrong, Richie. And I hope to God you don't get your nose rubbed in it." Todd stood up and opened the office door. "Hey, Todd." "Yes, Richie." "When's the last time you had sex?" "Yesterday. You see, Richie, I know how to live, Richie. Maybe you should try it sometime." The Bridge The door hissed as Ben walked on to the bridge with a look of determination on his face. The flurry of activity was far beyond the normal hustle and bustle of the bridge. A few heads turned when Ben walked in. Some reacted, some didn't to Ben's presence. Captain Hatcher was in his chair looking over printouts and talking to Ely Storm. Mike saw Ben come in and walked over to meet him. "You ready to take over the helm?" "Not yet." Johnny was in the cadet's CO chair. "He still needs more crying time," he said. Mike glared at him. "This isn't the time, Johnny." "It never is," he grumbled. Ben walked up to Captain Hatcher. Ely, seeing the look on Ben's face stepped aside. "Uncle Steve, I need to talk to you." Hatcher glared at him. "You know you don't call me that here, Ben." "Sorry. I forgot. I need so talk to you." "There's no time for that, Ben. Don't you understand we're in red alert?" "This has to do with that. Please Uncl..er...Captain. I think I know some things. And we have to get Douglas." "Not now, Ben!" "Yes! Now! You need to hear this!" "Nobody talks to me like that, cadet!" "Uncle Steve. Please?" "Five minutes. That's all you get. Five minutes. Change to yellow alert." "Cadet Cooper, you have the conn." "Me?" "Unless you've changed your name, cadet." "But we're in red alert." Cadets could not command under red alert conditions. "Wake up cadet, or can't you make out yellow? But we're now dead in space. I don't think you can do much harm you can do in five minutes, cadet, and Commander Creevy can always bail you out. After all she is a charter member of your fan club." He shot Creevy a glance and went briskly to his ready room, with Ben trailing him. "What is so all-fired important Cadet Collins that you break the rule we agreed you wouldn't break?" "And what rule was that?" "Calling me Uncle Steve." "That was your rule, not mine." "We don't have time to argue it now, our time is short. What do you want?" Ben jumped a bit at the Captain's curtness, but he held his ground. "Two things, sir." He decided to make this as formal as he could. "And what would they be?" "First, we need to go back to where Douglas disappeared so we can get him back again." "How do you know that would get him back? You don't know anything about what we just went through." "I know enough to know we can't get Douglas back if we're not in the same spot we were before." "Douglas is lost for good, Ben." Ben could feel his blood rising as he fought to control his temper. "Have you told his father that?" "After this crisis is over he will find out." "And you're going to tell him you did nothing to bring him back?" "He'll understand." "Like hell he will! Um...Sir." "That's enough Cadet Collins. You're dismissed!" "Maybe Cadet Collins is dismissed, but your nephew Ben isn't." "I don't have time for this, Ben." Ben dove right in before he could be stopped again. "Uncle Steve, ever since the `Wonder Boy' almost got shot out of space you haven't been our captain. Oh, you've sat in the Captain's chair and taken up space and given orders but everybody can tell you don't have your heart in it. If you did, we'd go back to find Douglas. Instead you're just happy to sit here and not make decisions and not take risks and not go back for a lost crew member that maybe you could rescue. You've gotten scared to take risks and to command and we all know it and it hurts us, Uncle Steve." "You mean the kind of choice you've been making the last week or so, Ben?" Hatcher asked with surprising gentleness. "I was wrong. I was wrong to do that. I got into myself and what I did and I took Douglas right with me. I was wrong just like you are wrong. You've got to be our Captain. Everybody knows you're doing nothing about Douglas and everybody is waiting for you to give the order to go back. You know it just like I know it. I mean I know I don't know you that well because you've always been in space, but dad says you're the best captain in the fleet and now all you do is sit on your ass in your chair and look at printouts and hope you don't have to do anything." "Ben...." "I was on the `Wonder Boy' too, you know. Right there with Mark and Jessie. I was going to be killed right with them. Uncle Steve you made the right decision. We got lucky somebody caught Captain Storm's mistake, but from what you know you made the right decision." Ben was fighting back tears. "I would've died, Uncle Steve, but you did the right thing. Like you have to do the right thing now!" Steven Hatcher looked at his nephew with a mixture of horror, surprise, and respect. Mark would never had dared talk to him like that. Jessie pretty much didn't talk to him at all, though he could see some similarities between Jesse and his cousin. Jessie was beginning to show the same feistiness Ben was displaying. As much as he wanted to think otherwise, and as much as he would never admit it out loud, Ben was right. He had been hiding. He had been unwilling to lead. After what happened with Jay, and after what had almost happened with the "Wonder Boy" he could feel his confidence in his leadership ebb away, as he could tell was happening with Eli. The Lady Lex didn't need two has-beens. What it needed was leaders ready to give their all to the boys they had committed to. It was time to step it up. Without acknowledging Ben was right he simply said, "Finding that worm hole won't be easy." Ben let his breath out. It was as if he hadn't taken a breath since he stepped into the ready room. "I know. But I think I can find it. It's like I have a picture of it in my mind. It has to be in almost the same place." "You have to touch it without entering it. And we have to do it before it closes. Some of the wormholes were closing as we found them. It may already be gone." "I know that, too Was Gary at the helm then?" "Yes he was. I will put Kalon Masters there for this." "Uncle...er..Sir, I think I should be at the helm." "Sorry, Ben. This needs somebody experienced. We're lucky to have Kalon. He's the best pilot in the fleet. This maneuver will need his experience." "Sir, I know I can do it. Kalon says I'm a natural. And I know exactly what I'm looking for. He'd have to guess at the wormhole. When I see it I'll know it. We can't be guessing. I'm good enough to do it." Ben spoke with a confidence and authority he hadn't felt in a long time. He hadn't rid himself of his demons, but for the moment, at least, he could live with them. He needed to bring Douglas back. "One more thing, sir." "What's that, cadet?" "I think we get back into warp space I'll be able to feel Douglas. I don't know why I think that, but I do. I think there were all kinds of things coming through that wormhole and it's what made me feel the way I felt." "If that's the case, Ben, when we go back into warp space those same feeling may overwhelm you again." "I know that. I think I know what caused how I felt." But not completely, he thought to himself-the nightmares had been with him since the day Kiran died. But since they hit warp every emotion had been magnified somehow. He was only going to sit with Douglas in the "Wonder Boy" for a day to recover his senses. Instead he was hit with such an overwhelming sense of defeat he couldn't even function. He didn't know if it was because they were our of warp, or because of Trev's loving talk, or because he had to have Douglas back, but while the emotions were still there, the sense of defeat was gone. "I know I can fight it. And on top of that, I'll be feeling Douglas through there, too. I'm the person who has to be at the helm." "And you're sure you're good enough?" "I know I am, sir. I'm the best pilot on the Lady Lex. Someday I want to be a helmsman in the SFA. I want to be the best there is, like Kalon." "I don't see you as an SFA helmsman, Ben." Ben's heart sank at the comment. "You don't?" "No. I see you as a captain. Now let's take care of business." Ben beamed as he followed Captain Steven Hatcher back to the bridge. Desert Planet Matt looked at the stump that had been Jake Master's hand. "Aye, lad, it isn't pretty," Jake said. "Jake Masters now has something personal at stake here. It was for money. Now it's revenge. Earth and Kriton must go to war, and Kriton must go down." "That's why you kidnapped me isn't it?" "Aye. And your father has been most cooperative. Most cooperative." He remembered the last communication he had sent to the now newly appointed Ambassador to Kriton. "All trade talks with the Kritons must be stalled. And the Peace Conference must be sabotaged." Ambassador Talon had been the power on Kriton, but Matt's father had been the brains, the negotiator. Now, as the official Ambassador, he was had the power, the power to destroy any budding relations between Kriton and Earth. The final line was merely a reminder. "Your son will be perfectly safe and happy until you've done your job." "I want to see him again," Matt said. "Once he's done what Jake Masters wants." "I miss him." "I know lad. And I'm sincerely sorry. It's business you know. Strictly business. I like you lad. I like you very much." "What's going to happen to your hand?" "I'll get a new one. The doctors have already started it. Amazing what modern medicine can do. But it doesn't stop Jake Masters from being angry." Jake smiled at Matt. "You want Jake to stay. lad?" Matt flopped down on his bed, wearing nothing but a pair of skimpy shorts. He was tired of staying here. He missed his family. He missed the parties. He missed his friends. He missed Tim and all the things they did together. But he also wanted Jake. He wanted his big hairy cock in his ass. He wanted his hard hairy body close to him in bed. He wanted Jake to like him. He had a crush on Jake that he couldn't shake. Matt had never heard of the Stockholm Syndrome, where hostages ended up identifying with their captors, but he was very much a victim of it, and at age 12 it was easy for him to fall into the trap. He wanted Jake to let him go, to return him home. He hated Jake for keeping him here. He wanted Jake in his bed fucking him hard. He loved Jake for loving him. "Well, lad? You haven't had Jake in your bed for awhile. You ready to find out what you've been missing?" Matt gave Jake as neutral a look as he could. "No. I want to be alone right now." "So be it, lad. You knows where Jake is if you wants him." Jake, the infamous smuggler, was many things, some good, but most bad. But he also had his own standards of integrity. He would never force himself on somebody. He walked out of Matt's room, full of desire, but willing to let the boy have the solitude he wanted. Earth Douglas skirted along the side of the field, heading for the bunker. He wasn't sure why he didn't just go directly to the bunker, but something told him he shouldn't be seen. Maybe it was because he didn't belong there. He walked in behind some bushes that were maybe a 100 meters from the door to the bunker. His mind was spinning. He knew he was doing the right thing for Ben. Kiran would be let out the door; Ben, Andrew, and Trevor would come back and find him pissed off but alive, and Ben's life would go on as it should. Yet, questions kept running through his head. Was it his destiny to meet Ben? What would happen to him once he changed the past? Would he just disappear and his life end? Even if he didn't change the past, would he even return to the Lady Lex? Was he doomed to be stuck here in this time? And if he was, would he end up meeting himself as well as Ben? He knew if he stayed behind this bush trying to sort out the answers he would be paralyzed by indecision. The time to act was now or he would never be able to do it. Just as he was about to move, he heard voices. He stopped and watched as two men approached from the other side. They looked to be in their twenties or thirties and were a bit on the scruffy side. One was tall and lean and had long dirty brown hair and a faded red baseball cap on. The other was shorter, a bit on the stout side, with thinning blond hair. They both wore jackets and jeans. "I thought those kids would never leave," the tall one said. "I only saw three of them go," the short one said. "Where's the fourth?" "Went home, I guess." Then both of them and Douglas heard the shouting start up again from behind the door. "Or maybe not. Sounds like somebody is stuck in there." "Look, we gotta get the goods to Cassiday by tonight. We can't keep waiting for these kids to clear out. It's get it now or lose out on a big payday." "Look. It's one kid. It's not like we've let something like that stop us before." What's going on, Douglas thought? Who are these guys? The tall one pulled a big bandanna out of his pocket. "This should do the trick, don't ya think, Max?" Douglas looked on in horror. Oh my God! I have to stop them. The Bridge Captain Hatcher and Ben strode back onto the bride with a purpose. Both Ely Storm and Commander Creevy noticed a spring in his step that had been missing for awhile. "Navigator. Set a course for the wormholes. Captain Storm prepare to put us back in warp space." "The worm holes? Sir, we can't go back there. We know nothing about what went on back there. We lost one crew member already." "Our intention is to get that crew member back, Captain Storm, and to do it before that hole closes. " Ely fought down a smile. This was the Steven Hatcher he knew and loved serving under. "Do you want me to take the helm, sir?" Kalon Masters asked. "No. I want Cadet Collins at the helm?" Kalon smiled inside. Yes! "Are we going to red alert, captain?" Commander Creevy asked. Regulations required a regular crew member man all command stations during a red alert. "No. We stay at yellow." Ben approached the helm, which was being manned by Gary. Gary got up, but Ben sat at the second chair. "Hang with me, Gary. You deserve to be here." Gary took the seat next to Ben. Kalon stood behind the helm, taking it all in, wondering what, exactly, was going on. Ben reached for his dark glasses, but they weren't in their accustomed spot. Gary smiled and grabbed something from under the second chair console. He handed Ben his dark glasses and his CD. Ben popped into the CD player, but heard nothing. "The music is too much of a distraction. They drown out orders," Commander Creevy said from her XO's chair. "And sometimes music is a necessary part of the mission," Captain Hatcher said as he flicked a switch on his console and "Flying" started to blare over the bridge's PA system. Hatcher quickly cranked the volume down. "Within limits, of course." Ben fought off his grin. This was his station. This was where he belonged. And he was back. He brought the ship to the proper course and Hatcher gave the order to engage the warp drive. Ben felt the ripple effect as the Lady Lex headed into warp space. Right away he was glad he had kept Gary next to him and that Kalon Masters was behind him. He had been instructed that the feel of the helm was different in warp drive, and now he was experiencing it first hand without any practice. He felt a momentary bolt of panic shoot through him. He had said he could do this. But was he right? However, with some quick help from Gary and Kalon he got a feel for the helm, and his training and instincts took over. Ben was a born pilot, and it didn't take long for his talent to take over and for him to become one with the helm and the huge starship he was guiding. As they traveled through warp space seeking out the worm holes, Ben could feel his mood shifting. He could feel the doubts coming back. He could sense Kiran's fear. He could feel the guilt well up inside him again. He could sense his own fear and self-hatred. But just as he was ready to tear off his glasses and scream, "I can't do this!" he also felt Douglas's love in the mix. That was all he needed to recover. The two feelings convinced him that the anomaly was still open. There was a chance to bring Douglas back. "I see the wormholes," Scooter said. As cadet science officer he was working side by side with Commander Hollis, the science officer. Ben checked his own readouts and could see their formation now that Scooter had pointed them out. Wormholes weren't' unusual in warp space. They were a hazard, but once the hazard had been discovered in the early days of warp travel, early detection had pretty much neutralized the danger. These wormholes were different, however, in that there were a large number of them in the same space. Usually they were a rare, isolated phenomena. But the biggest difference was the time anomaly Douglas had fallen into. No SFA ship had ever encountered something like it before. Captain Hatcher could only hope that Douglas had the sense to do nothing, fearing any tampering with the time-space continuum would have disastrous results. Ely, Scooter, and Hollis hovered over the science instruments as Ben approached the wormholes with caution. "That's strange," Scooter said. "Some of the holes have closed. But there are six new ones there, too. They've opened since we were here last." "We've made some calculations," Commander Hollis announced. "We feel that to duplicate what happened previously, the Lady Lex must pass close to the time anomaly, but with only the `Wonder Boy' touching it. No other part of the ship can touch it." Captain Hatcher thought about what Commander Hollis had just said. It would take a combination of precise navigation, precise engineering, and precise piloting to accomplish their mission. He looked around at the faces on the bridge, both those of the teenage cadets and the seasoned SFA veterans. And God help us if any of those factors are wrong, he thought.. The Kriton Fleet General Elihu winced as he learned he had lost yet another vessel. Two in two hours. He would need to bring the maneuvers to a stop until the problem was figured out. The wormholes they created would be kept in place. This was a key jumping off place on the invasion route, but one of the wormholes apparently wasn't stable. Until they could figure out which one it was and either eliminate it or stabilize it he couldn't risk losing more ships. He hated relying on his Admiral friend, but he needed him. He knew that he needed the excuse of the trade talks being stalled, and more importantly the peace treaty talks collapsing, to give him the excuse of the invasion. Not that he truly needed an excuse, but it would be much easier to solidify his position with the high council behind him. What the good Admiral Whitaker had in mind, a tense standoff that would increase the size of their respective fleets and the power of both of them wasn't going to happen, however. Elihu paced his war room and thought through the present situation to himself. Whitaker thinks he had the fleet and the power for a standoff, and in a sense he's right. The difference between them is going to be the wormholes, once our scientists get the rogue wormhole stabilized. It may take a few more months, because when the next full test happened he would be completely sure of the wormholes. He had been assured they were ready after some minor test. Obviously they were not. But when they were, Admiral Whitaker will have unknowingly opened the door to Earth for him. Kriton Ambassador Bergen read the e-mail in front of him of what seemed the hundredth time. He wanted his son back. He wasn't sure if he could pay the price. He didn't want his son growing up in a galaxy threatened by war, yet he did want his son to have the opportunity to grow up. Oh, Matt, he thought. I know I haven't always been there for you. I know I all too often put my career ahead of you, but I love you. You're my son. You're only twelve, and I promise that WHEN I get you back I will be the father you deserve. The e-mail reminded him of his duties to slow down the trade talks and sabotage the upcoming peace conference. It had a huge reminder not to discuss the situation with anybody. It reminded him there were spies on his staff who knew just about his every move, and it contained evidence to verify that fact. But it was time to take a gamble. He couldn't sit and let other forced determine the fate of Earth and of his son. He dialed a code into the lock of his satchel. He pulled a small box-like device out which he hooked into his computer. It had been given to him by a one-time attaché of the Ambassador to Planet Lucifer when he was stationed there. They had become friends, and he had helped her out of a tough situation. Just before she was whisked off Lucifer for Earth, she gave him the device and told him to use it until the situation became so desperate there was no other way out of it. He took it, figuring that situation would never arrive for member of the diplomatic corps. He was wrong. The time had arrived . The device was good for one use only. It would direct one e-mail to a secret mailbox. After this many years, he wasn't even certain the mailbox existed. He did know that the e-mail he sent would be undetectable. He stared at his screen and started typing. "Dear Myrna: I have the unsolvable dilemma you gave me this address for. My son Matt.........." He finished it and hit send. He had no idea what would happen at the other end, but at least he had done something at his end. Engineering Ely Storm had left the bridge and gone down to engineering. He wanted to be at the big consoles to do plot the precision work he would need to do with the warp drive. The bridge instruments were good for tracking and controlling normal operations, but not for the kind of precise maneuvering the Lady Lex would need to do in order to make contact with the anomaly properly. I've showed my age twice, now, he thought. I almost destroyed the "Wonder Boy" with my miscalculation, and I threw the wrong switch as we went into warp for the first time. Why do I think I can handle something is complicated as this? The boy at the helm. Ben. He was on the "Wonder Boy". He is up there depending on me being in tune with his every move. He's fourteen. Too young to be doing something like this. But then, I'm too old. Between the two of us how can we help not messing this up? And yet there's my old friend Steven Hatcher, strutting on the bridge like he was still the captain of the "Excalibur." If Ben Collins and Captain Hatcher could reach back and find new energy and life, then maybe he could too, if only for the few minutes necessary to perform the delicate maneuver. Ely put his headphones on to connect him to the bridge. He liked having the headphones for communication because they blocked out distractions, and for what was going to come up, distractions were something he didn't need. Ryan and Jesse went quietly about their business, following Ensign Anderson around as well as other members of the engineering crew. But all eyes were on Ely Storm, wondering if the man who was once the top engineer in the SFA fleet had it in him to help put the Lady Lex where she needed to be. The Bridge Ben had gotten used to the warp handling. The difference between the touch of the helm in standard space and warp space was not nearly as great as the difference had been with the "Wonder Boy". The Lady Lex slipped under the wormholes. It would need to be flown in the opposite direction to get the "Wonder Boy", which was berthed on the port side, into the proper part of the anomaly. Ben had the urge to perform a Quinlan Loop, a maneuver Kalon Masters had taught him on the "Wonder Boy" to bring the Lady Lex into position. He knew he couldn't do it; the big starship was build for the strain of that kind of maneuver, but it was tempting, because it would certainly get them lined up quicker if he did it. Once again a wave of depression crashed over him as he heard Kiran's voice speaking to him. "Ben, Ben, Ben, help me Ben!" I can't help you Kiran. I can't. I killed you. I'm sorry. "I need to get away from here," Ben muttered out loud, his eyes starting to glaze over. Gary looked over at him, his hands poised to take control of the helm. He felt a hand shake him. It was Kalon. Ben shook his head and returned his concentration on the console in front of him. Kalon bent down and whispered in his ear, "Shake it off. Focus. Concentrate. You can do this." Ben focused on his music and on bringing the starship through a long looping turn. Another feeling hit him. This time it was a rush of love. It was Douglas. It had to be. Somehow he was connected to Kiran. He could feel feelings rushing at him from both. Once again, he shook his head, putting his concentration totally into piloting the Lady Lex. Kiran, Douglas, it made no difference now. He knew there was only one way to bring his love back, and that for him to succeed. For him to succeed he had to focus on his job and nothing else. Scooter was reading out numbers he and Commander Hollis were getting from the computer and their calculators. Ben fed the information into the helm as down in engineering Eli fed them into the engineering console. The speed and position of the Lady Lex had to be as close to the previous pass as they could make it. Ben looked into the view screen. He could see the wormholes clearly now, as well as the shimmer of the anomaly. He focused on the anomaly. "Two minutes to contact," Scooter said in a monotone. "BEN BEN BEN HELP ME! HELP ME!" "No! Don't. I have to stop them. I have to!" The voices and feeling became stronger as the Lady Lex approached the anomaly. Ben blocked it all out, focused his mind as it had never been focused before. He silently thanked his experience as a baseball catcher, his coaches teaching him how to focus on a game, a pitcher, a pitch. His mind was on one thing, the shimmer in front of him. But unlike baseball, there was no room for a mistake. Earth The two men pulled the latch on the bunker door and pulled it open. Kiran came staggering out, saw the two men, and attempted to bolt. But the shorter man had a strong grip on his arm. "Ben, Ben, Ben, help me Ben!" Kiran screamed before the man covered his mouth with the bandanna. "No! Don't. I have to stop them. I have to!" Douglas started to move from behind the bush. The overall effect of his actions meant nothing to him at all now. All he knew was he had to save the boy, had to save Ben, had to keep somebody from dying. It was time to act! The Bridge Ben was totally focused four things. The shimmer in front of him, the numbers Scooter was feeding him, and the controls in his hands, and the music playing through the bridge. He heard the one minute mark, he eased up slightly on the speed, knowing they were flirting with dropping out of warp space, knowing if they did they would have to start over, knowing deep in his brain that this chance was going to be their only chance, knowing if he hit the anomaly wrong he ran the risk of damaging or even destroying the Lady Lex. He pulled the ship slightly to port, looking at the diagram of the port side of the Lady Lex. He could see the anomaly showing up on the diagram as he eased the Lady Lex into it. It was important the "Wonder Boy", poking out from the side of the starship as it rested in its berth, be the only part of the Lady Lex to hit the anomaly. Miss it and he would have to loop around again, running the risk of the hole closing. Get too much of it and the results could be disastrous. Earth Douglas ran out from behind the bushes, quickly covering the yards between him, the two men, and Kiran. The shorter man was trying to drag Kiran back into the bunker, smothering him with the bandanna. Kiran struggled and gave a muffled grunt. but he was no match for the two men. Douglas didn't know if he would be either, especially has he ran out in full view without a weapon. He didn't care. He had to do the right thing, and the right thing meant trying to save the boy's life. Max's hand fell from Kiran's face. "It's one of the kids." "Ben! Ben! It's you!" Kiran yelled, noting the similarity in size between the two boys, but in his panic not realizing the boy dashing across the field wasn't Ben. The Bridge "Ben! Ben! It's you!" screamed in Ben's head. No it's not! Ben said to himself and shut the voice out. Douglas is all that counts now. He gave his control another tug. This was it. He was less than thirty seconds away. He looked at his panel. Every number had to be right. Every move had to be right. Another tug to port. Another change in speed. He looked at the diagram. At the numbers. The speed was off a notch. Come on Ely, match what I want. Speed it up. Engineering Ely saw the effects of Ben's commands to the helm on his instrument panel. For the most part all he had to do is make sure those numbers matched what his calculations said they should be. The connection between the helm and the warp drive was not totally automatic, but for the most part the commands Ben gave the helm went directly to the warp drive. He saw two numbers that didn't match, waited for them to automatically adjust, and realized they weren't going to. The ship was going just a tad too slowly. He needed to do a manual adjustment. He looked at his won calculations and pushed on his own control. There was not enough time to double check his calculation, and if he was wrong like had been all too often lately, the all the work of the young helmsman would mean nothing. He had just doomed him and perhaps the entire crew of the Lady Lex. The Bridge Ben saw the numbers adjust. Excellent, he thought. Way to go Eli. Fifteen seconds. Earth Max slapped the bandanna back over Kiran's mouth and dragged him into the bunker. His partner waited for the boy running toward him. He pulled out a laser pistol, and pointed it at Douglas. He looked through the scope, saw it was aimed perfectly and prepared to fire. Douglas saw the man pull out the pistol, raise it, and point it at him. "Shit! Shit! I'm doomed! I'm dead!" At the same moment he felt another flood of emotion. A flood of love. A message that said, "I'm coming for you, Douglas," in a voice that could only be Ben's. The Bridge The "Wonder Boy" and the entire port side within five decks of her had been cleared. Nobody knew what to except when contact was made with the anomaly, but everybody knew they didn't want to lose yet another crew member to the mysterious shimmer. Ben checked his diagram, his numbers, his diagram. He felt as if he and the Lady Lex were one, they were connected, that he could almost think the huge starship into doing whatever he wanted it to do. The "Wonder Boy" touched the anomaly. The diagram flashed and went blank. Earth The tall man was ready to pull the trigger when suddenly the boy and everything around him shimmered. The man pulled the trigger at the wavy figure of the boy. The laser beam shot out of the pistol right on target, but it passed through the spot the boy had been. The background solidified again, but the boy was gone. The "Wonder Boy" Douglas staggered, coughed, and fell right into a leather seat. He looked around, wondering where he was. His mind started to clear up and he realized he was on the "Wonder Boy." He was back! He was home! A wave of relief rushed through him. That was followed by an almost equal wave of depression. But he'd failed. He hadn't saved the boy. He hadn't save Kiran. He wondered where Ben was. Ben had been sitting right here when he had been whisked into the past, but now the "Wonder Boy" was empty and silent. He got up from the chair. He had to find Ben. He had to tell him what really happened. The Bridge The Lady Lex passed the anomaly. The diagram lit back up. The "Wonder Boy" was still there. But was Douglas there? Ian was already trying to contact the "Wonder Boy", but Ben knew that the shuttle had been powered down. "Uncle...er...captain, can Gary take the helm. Can I leave the bridge?" Ben was forgetting formalities. He had to find Douglas. He had to see if the maneuver worked. "Permission granted, Cadet Collins." Ben took off his glasses and dropped them on the console. Before Captain Hatcher could kill the music and before Gary could touch the controls of the helm, Ben was off the bridge. Steven Hatcher breathed a sigh of relief. Whatever Ben found as he left the bridge, he had made the right decision. A command decision. The Lady Lex was once again his. Then he thought about his nephew. Watch out, Kalon Masters. It won't be long and the pupil will be surpassing the teacher. It was hard to believe the boy was a 14 year old rookie cadet. Steven Hatcher had rarely seen a starship piloted was such precision and delicacy. Engineering Ely Storm took his headphones off. He'd been right. His engineering calculations had been perfect. He knew they'd made perfect contact exactly as planned. He might be old, but he wasn't dead yet. He smiled a rueful smile. But sometimes it feels damned close. The only question was, had Douglas been returned to them? That question would be answered soon. All he knew at the moment was he and Stephen Hatcher had been redeemed. They'd been as good as at any time in their careers. The "Wonder Boy" Ben willed the turbo elevator to go faster. He exited on deck six and literally flew down the corridors of the Lady Lex. He turned a corner and almost crashed head-on into Douglas, sending them both crashing to the floor. Before either one could say anything they each saw who they had collided with. "DOUGLAS!" Ben screamed as he smothered his boyfriend with kisses. "You're back! You're back!" Douglas planted a big kiss on Ben. "You did it! I know you did it! I could feel you coming for me." "Never mind that. You're safe. That's all the counts. What happened? Where did you go?" Douglas's demeanor suddenly sobered as the two boys picked themselves up off the deck. Ben put his hand under Ben's chin. "Let's go back on the `Wonder Boy'." Ben wondered what had suddenly changed the mood of his boyfriend. He took his hand, squeezed it three times, their secret signal for "I love you" and went with him to the "Wonder Boy", pleased when Douglas gave him three return squeezes. They sat on the seat of the "Wonder Boy" where they had spent so much quiet time over the past few days. "I don't need to be here any more," Ben said. "I'm free of that. I'm the helmsman again. That doesn't mean I'm free of the nightmares and guilt, but I can do what I need to, again." "You brought the Lady Lex back for me, didn't you?" "Yeah. But like I said, we can talk about that later. What happened to you?" "Ben. I went back into the past. I think I know why you were getting so depressed since we entered warp space, because you see that anomaly linked you to...." "...it linked me to Kiran." "Yeah. How did you know?" "I don't know. It just made sense. All the guilt feelings I already had for being responsible for my friend's death got bigger and deeper. It had to be something. It was like the feelings of both of linked us to Kiran through that wormhole." Douglas put his hand on Ben's shoulder with a warm, gentle, loving touch and said quietly, but forcefully, "Ben, you didn't kill Kiran." "I didn't? Of course I did. I was there. Don't start with that, Douglas. I killed him just as sure as I'm sitting here with him. I'm getting over the feelings...." Douglas cut him off. "Ben, I mean what I said. Word for word. You didn't kill him." Douglas grabbed Ben by the shoulder and told him what had happened. Ben listened with rapt attention. He couldn't believe what he was hearing. "Don't you see, Ben? Everybody was so sure that closing that door caused Kiran to die of suffocation. Nobody looked any deeper than that. But you said yourself you didn't understand how Kiran could have used up the air that quickly, even in that musty, closed bunker. Well, he didn't. He was killed. But not by you. Ben, you, Trevor, and Andrew are free. You didn't kill your friend." "But we still locked him in that bunker he isn't killed. We're still responsible." "Maybe. Maybe not. All I know is how can you figure on something like that happening? You were kids playing. You were going to come back. What you did wasn't what killed Kiran." Douglas thought for a moment, and then went on. "I don't know anything about fate and destiny. I'm just a kid. But I know I wasn't able to do a thing to save him. If you hadn't touched the anomaly when you did I would have been killed, too. Maybe what happened was meant to be. It's all too confusing. All I know is, I love you, Ben." Ben fought off the tears. A load was coming off his shoulders. He couldn't wait to tell his brothers. Now they could mourn properly; a mourning not full of guilt, but full of love. The Bridge Steven Hatcher turned off his comm switch. Ben Collins had just let him know Douglas was back. He almost wanted to fight off tears upon hearing of the rescue of the son of his old friend. Ben also told him he had more to tell, but that it would wait. Knowing how close those two boys were, Hatcher could understand. "Mr. Navigator. Mr. Helmsman. Plot a course of Phosphorous Prime. It's time to see if the village of Ghent is still as beautiful as I remember it." To be continued......