I'm crying. It's 4 o'clock in the morning and I'm laying by an electronic fireplace in my apartment crying. I never cry in public. I never cry. I'm not some Cancer or Pisces all in touch with my inner deep feelings or anything like that. The fact that I'm crying right now is something that is blowing my mind. I feel weak. I feel ineffective.
I feel unbalanced.
And I hated that feeling.
"What time is it?"
I turn and notice that Ryder has walked into the living room. I get embarrassed as soon as he does. I don't realize how loud I was being at that moment. I find myself struggling to get out of here.
"Sorry. I'll head to my room. Didn't mean to disturb you."
I almost forgot about him. He's been avoiding me. After finding out that Apollo and Lloyd were married I got sick to my stomach. The only thing that I could do is cry like a little fucking idiot. I attempt to change the subject though. Luckily it is dark in the living room. I start towards my room.
I don't make it far. Ryder grabs me by my arm.
"Wait are you fucking crying?" he asks.
Shit. He's noticed.
"Do you really care?"
"I didn't think Libras cried."
"We aren't robots," I respond.
He shakes his head, "No that would be Virgos. Your little creepy ass friend who stands by the door who likes to break fingers is more like a robot. I just figured your lives were so balanced and ideal that you had no reason to cry."
"That's ridiculous. That's like me saying Aries don't believe in wearing shirts..." I respond.
I look at Ryder. He is shirtless again. He's still holding onto my arm. After a few seconds he releases it probably because it gets a little awkward. He sits there and shakes his head watching me.
"What are you crying about?" he asks me, "Just spill it. Not that I care or anything. I just need to get back to sleep and it's clear that you are a little bit emotional right now. So let's just get this over with. Let me know what's bothering you."
There is an awkwardness at that moment. At first I want to resist but then I realize this that Ryder is actually attempting to be somewhat nice. I mean he's still doing it in his rude way but at least he was making some sort of attempt. That was better than what I was getting before. I figured I probably shouldn't waste this.
I lean up against the wall in the darkness, "I got an invitation...to a dinner party."
"So it's the person who the invitation was from. I just found out the person that I was in love with is married to someone else."
"Are you serious?" he asks and sighs a little bit, "Damn..."
"Well now you know. Goodnight."
I start walking away. He grabs me again. For someone who got so mad when I grabbed him back at the bar he was really being grabby now. I stand still though and turn around.
"Why you walking away? That can't be it."
"It is it."
"You don't like to talk about your feelings do you?" he asks.
"It doesn't accomplish anything. It makes me look off..." I explain to him, "With Libras your head and your heart are always supposed to be equal. We embrace our emotions but we make our choices based off of our head. The man I am in love with is named Apollo and I walked in on him with my best friend. They look like they just had sex."
Its awkward talking to the guy who is my husband about my ex lover. I'm shocked when Ryder actually seems to be interested in this conversation. Maybe he is being a little bit more open because it is in the middle of the morning. Maybe he is being more open because he saw me crying and he just wants me to shut up so he can get back to sleep like he said. Whatever the reason I'm trying to understand Ryder a little bit better.
"A---Is he an Aquarius? Those guys start with A's. What a waste. Aries' names should start with A's if you ask me. They get everything first. I guess that's beside the point. Maybe it's not. A. Oh my god. Wait. It's that pretty boy from the back at the bar huh? That Aquarius in the suit that I laid out on his ass."
He seems proud of his show of violence right now.
I nod, "Yeah."
"Jesus. What a fucking square. The guy looks like he sleeps in a fucking suit. Is that really your type?" Ryder laughs, "He couldn't even fight."
"I don't look for a fighter."
"Well if you were my lover I would probably fight a little harder for you. He fell flat on his ass."
"You ARE my lover," I correct him, "In case you forgot."
Things get awkward. I think he did forget. Maybe he thinks he's just talking to someone on the street. It's making it harder to have this conversation right now. It seems like he seems to be reminded of the situation that we are in. Maybe I shouldn't have brought that up. His face gets a little tight again. He crosses his arms and seems am little defiant.
"You know what I mean."
I nod, "I suppose. Anyway he was drunk. And it's not the point. I stormed out when I found out they were together. It was immature of me. I turned him down when he proposed to me. I have no right to be mad..."
He looks at me, "Why are you so fucking fair?"
"I'm just looking at things from his view..."
He sighs a little bit, "Jesus Chris. That's ridiculous. Is that what you guys do? You have the right to be pissed. You're in your emotions. Sure you were wrong but you can be pissed and wrong at the same time. Stop being so goddam fair all the time. Are you mad about this?"
"I don't know..."
"Law. Are you fucking mad about this or not?"
"Go to this stupid fucking dinner party and scream at them. It doesn't have to make sense. It doesn't have to be fair. Scream and look stupid."
I'm so confused.
"What would that accomplish?"
He shrugs, "Nothing really. But you'll feel better. Try it. Now. I'm going to sleep so please keep it down."
He nods at that moment as though he's told me the most impressive thing in the world then he just walks off. You would have thought by Ryder's swagger that he had just created some master plan or something like that. Still...the more I think about it the more I realize that maybe this is what I was going to do. I open up my tablet.
I respond to the invitation that I got earlier from Apollo. I RSVP.
Work the next day is awkward. I purposely avoid my friends. I don't want to avoid the girls but I know that Lloyd is going to be with them. I know it's going to be super awkward. What's worse is that I start getting emails to my mobile device asking if I'm OK by the twins. I think Lloyd has finally broken the news to them about who he's married to. There's no other reason they would be so worried. I end up leaving training yet again. I feel like I'm running behind in the orientation classes but this new life is something that I just can't get used to.
By the end of the day I'm getting dressed and I've given Ryder a suit to wear for the dinner party as well.
Ryder is resistant as always.
"I never agreed to come with you to this dinner party. I stated that you should go. Alone. Meaning you should go do your thing."
"It was your idea. You're my husband."
"Fuck that sounds so weird when you say it," he states.
"Please. I mean I want to be able to sleep tonight. I think you want to be to be able to sleep tonight," I tell him.
The only thing I can think about is appealing to his sense of sleep at this point. I know Ryder doesn't like me. Hell. He probably hates my guts but he seems to really like the idea of sleeping. Me staying up crying about Apollo and Lloyd wasn't exactly my way of doing it.
Ryder looks at the suit.
"Can't believe this shit."
Ryder still wears the suit however. He still decides to go with me. I feel a sense of comfort with him being there...just because of how Ryder looks. Knowing Apollo he is pretty close to my friends and would be inviting some of them to this dinner party. By the time we pull up to Apollo's apartment I look over at Ryder and I'm just completely shocked at how handsome he is in a suit.
Ryder pulls at the tie. He looks behind his corner at Whistler who is standing outside the apartment. I know she won't come in. He gives her a look as though trying to get some sympathy but Whistler shows no pity. He clearly doesn't like it. He's coughing as though it's cutting off his breathing air. It's clearly not but this is a guy who's used to walking around with no shirt. He looks the part but Ryder clearly is uncomfortable. He won't stop jittering around. I'm actually shocked as we are standing at the door that he really decided to come to this thing. He clearly would rather be anywhere else but here right now. He doesn't seem like the type to get along with Aquarius, Libras and Geminis. The air signs weren't really his thing.
"I'll hate you forever for making me do this," he warns me, pulling down his tie, "Just so you know. Forever. That's a long time. You realize that right Law?"
I let him face me as we stand at the door. I adjust Ryder's tie. I close his jacket as well. He looks like an Aquarius honestly. I mean he isn't as tall as the Aquarius guys usually and his body is much more muscular than most Aquarius but like an Aquarius he looks so good in a suit. That is until Ryder opens his mouth. Then you remember that he definitely isn't the person who he says he is.
"Relax, you look handsome."
"Can you not---"
"Give me compliments and shit," he tells me shrugging me off a little bit, "It makes me feel weird."
"God forbid I tell my husband he looks handsome," I argue.
"Stop calling me that."
Difficult wasn't the word to describe Ryder. He scorns up his face a little bit. I ignore him and ring the doorbell to Apollo's apartment. His apartment isn't too far from mine. It's a penthouse suite. I wasn't expecting anything less from the next Police Commissioner.
It's Apollo that opens the door. When he sees me his eyes light up like they did a million times. He's so tall. He towers over us at the doorway wearing a white suit, white tie and pointed classy white shoes. He looks godly.
"Oh my god. Law. You showed up. I didn't think you were going to..."
"You sent me the invite."
"Yeah but...I just assumed that you would say no. I just assumed you wouldn't be comfortable with..."
Just at that moment I see Lloyd show up at the door. He is laughing about something. God knows what he is laughing about. He is in an amazing mood. I knew my best friend and I knew when my best friend was having the time of his life. I watch as Lloyd runs right into Apollo. The two of them grab each other close. I don't think Lloyd even recognizes me honestly. When his eyes do recognize me he has the same shocked expression. I feel like I'm intruding on the dinner party.
"Law. I didn't think you'd show up," Lloyd said.
"That's what I just said," Apollo responds.
The two of them laugh. Nothing is funny really. I think they are just trying to lighten the mood. The awkwardness is filling the threshold. It's so fucking awkward. I can tell they legitimately assumed I wouldn't show up for something like this. They probably sent the invitation just to be nice so that I wouldn't be insulted. The fact that I actually am here is getting to them. Still I watch Lloyd trying to save the situation. He leans over and gives me a quick hug. Apollo hesitates as though unsure whether to touch me or not, but regardless he decides not to. His hug is quick. Maybe he doesn't know how Lloyd will feel if he hugged me for too long. Maybe he doesn't know how I would react to it.
Lloyd struggles to save this moment, "You look amazing best friend. And oh my god. This must be your husband."
"This is an Aries?" Apollo asks.
I can see the slight shade in Apollo's voice as he looks Ryder up and down. Ryder is handsome right now. They doing assume that he is an Aries.
"Amazing," Lloyd says and smiles at me again, "What's his name?"
I'm distracted. Seeing the two of them together right here is hurting me. It is literally painful. Lloyd is trying his best to not make this awkward. He's getting some support from Apollo but not a lot. Apollo and I are exchanging these awkward glances every other second. Every time he looks at me it fucking hurts. It feels like he's taken a small knife and is pricking me with it in my chest over and over hoping to get to my heart.
I'm standing there. Speechless.
Lloyd gives me a half smile. My best friend knows me. He knows something's wrong.
"Um. Law. Listen...if this isn't a good time it would be really understandable if you didn't want to come in," Lloyd explains to me, "Apollo and I would completely be OK with that."
He was speaking for him and Apollo. How fast they were acting like a couple. Meanwhile my husband hated my guts.
I take a step back. I'm ready to leave.
Just as I turn to run someone stops me. It's Ryder. He pulls me over. He puts his arm over me and pulls me close. That's when he turns and he kisses me. He kisses me on the lips. It's just a soft peck but I'm shocked none-the-less that it happened. When Ryder kisses me in front of Apollo and Lloyd both their eyes shoot open in shock.
"My husband is perfectly fine. Matter of fact it was his idea to show up to this," Ryder says squeezing my arm a little bit harder.
Apollo looks Ryder up and down. He looks me up and down. After a quick awkward moment Apollo just walks into the house. He doesn't excuse himself. He doesn't invite us in. His face is like a stone figure as though someone carved it out of granite. He leaves Lloyd at our doorstep and Lloyd for the moment seems confused and lost in this awkward moment.
"Come in. Come in," Lloyd forces a smile, "Everyone is already here actually so. Right this way."
Lloyd walks in slowly. He instructs his robot to come help us with our coats while he walks away. I'm wearing a loose white shawl that I give the robot. I tried to dress as casual as I possibly could for this occasion. Just some slacks and a shawl. Nothing too crazy. Libras really didn't wear suits. As we walk into the house I am amazed by how beautiful it is. There isn't just one robot that comes over to help us but several. There is a big entry that that is deceivingly large once you walk in. The place looks homely like it was designed by a Cancer. I smell potpourri and fresh baked apple pie. It smells like someone's cabin in here in the middle of winter.
"You not going to break out crying are you?" he asks me, "Don't you dare fucking break down crying in here."
I was tougher than that. Me crying in the privacy of my own home was one thing. I didn't plan on bringing this in public. Still the awkwardness of this situation was beyond anything I'd ever felt before. A part of me wanted to turn around and leave. I wanted to avoid both Lloyd and Apollo for the rest of my life. But I couldn't do that. I had relationships with these people. The matchmaker set them up. They did nothing wrong.
"Why are you helping me?" I whisper to him.
He shrugs, "I came didn't I? Might as well help you out. You were tongue tied back there. I don't know. I just felt bad."
"I thought you hated me," I respond.
He seems stuck on how to respond so he doesn't. He just grabs my hand and leads me towards the dinner room table. I see a bunch of people that I'm used to. Aeron and Lourdes are the most beautiful couple. Lourdes gives me an awkward smile while I walk in. Her sister Lizabeth is sitting with a pretty girl who I must assume is her wife.
I sit at the table with Ryder. It's super awkward. Loreal has a smile on her face. No one is talking. She must be eating this awkward moment up right now.
"We were already eating. We just assumed no one else was showing up. I'm so sorry. We definitely would have waited," Lloyd apologizes, "Please help yourselves."
The dinner is like a mini-Thanksgiving. There is a big ham and all these extra sides. Who knew that Lloyd was domesticated? He definitely didn't cook this. It had to have been Apollo. Apollo is sitting the head of the table now. He downs a glass of wine, pours himself another and downs that. He pours himself another and then looks across the table at me. His eyes burn into mine. He isn't avoiding eye contact. He isn't even trying to hide it. This is just like the bar all over again except this time we are both married.
Aeron starts up to shake Ryder's hand but Apollo gives his friend a look that is so telling that Aeron settles for giving Ryder nothing more than a wave and a whisper of his name as an introduction. Lourdes just keeps smiling her stupid smile and doesn't even introduce herself.
Loreal doesn't have that problem though.
"I'm Loreal. This is my husband Gregory. He's a Gemini. He's in charge of the State Treasury. You must be the infamous Aries."
"His name's Ryder," I damn near spit at Loreal.
Gregory gives us a warm smile. He might actually be a decent guy but being that he's a Gemini you never really know. They have a way of seeming like things they really aren't. The fact that he is compatible with Loreal makes me wonder about him. None-the-less I try to fake a smile.
Ryder surprisingly seems to do the same, "I work in Construction."
"Construction?" Lizabeth jumps in, "My wife Gina actually works in Construction too."
Gina is a Gemini. She isn't as pretty as Lizabeth but hey complement each other. I don't think Lizabeth would really be able to date someone as pretty as her. She's one of those kind of people. She nudges Gina a little bit probably giving her a context clue to break the ice a little bit. By how they are focusing so heavily on Ryder and I it was clear they'd already become acquainted with one another.
Gina seems to immediately start going through her resume as her wife's request, "I own several construction companies. B&W construction, Warner Construction, Oxen Astronomy Construction. Which ones do own Ryder?"
"Actually I don't own any. I work for Warner Construction."
Gina seems a little confused, "Like you actually are a construction worker? Oh. How nice."
It's awkward. I don't think Gina was expecting that. I don't think the others were either. For someone who owned a construction company you wouldn't think she would be surprised to meet a construction worker. Maybe it's the fact that she is sharing a meal with him that is really getting underneath her skin. She smiles over at Lourdes. They whisper something amongst themselves that is rather rude if you ask me.
"Yeah I guess I should call you, Boss. Maybe during dinner we can talk about this raise," Ryder responds.
It causes a few people across the table to laugh. I'm shocked Ryder is able to do that. He flashes a smile as well. I would think at that moment it was Apollo working a crowd. I notice however that Apollo doesn't laugh at Ryder's joke.
"You must be good with your hands," Lourdes states, "That's a good thing Law. A man who knows how to actually make things."
"That is actually really cool," Law adds in, "What kind of things can you do Ryder?"
Ryder starts going through all the kind of projects he worked through back in Ram Country. The others are listening and completely intrigued. Ryder is actually charming as he talks. For some reason I find myself watching his lips and laughing at every small joke he says. After about an hour or so it seems almost like people are starting to warm up to him. Loreal is even asking Ryder questions about Ram Country and things from back home. Every once in a while Ryder looks over to me, flashes me a smile, pulls me in close and then leans over and gives a kiss. I watch as Lourdes and Lizabeth giggle like school girls every time he does it.
I don't know if it's an act that Ryder is pulling on but I'm actually shocked. I thought he was going to come to this dinner and act like a complete Neanderthal. That actually wasn't the case. He was surprising them but surprising me the entire time.
But all the while I notice Apollo. He's finished an entire bottle of wine. His eyes are rolling in the back of his head. Every word that Ryder says seems to annoy him more and more.
"I hear you Aries learn to fight as soon as you learn to walk," Lourdes asks Ryder.
"It's tough out there. A lot of things come early in Ram Country. We learn to hunt at an early age. We learn to fight at an early age. Hell, between me and you. We learned to fuck at an early age too."
The girls erupt in senseless giggles. Lloyd and Aeron even laugh a little bit. Apollo clears his throat though and glares at Ryder.
"That is a little inappropriate talk for dinner," Apollo explains.
An awkward silence follows. Ryder doesn't let it last too long. He smiles a little bit before challenging him, "Didn't think sex was inappropriate for grown adults."
"Maybe you guys discuss that at Ram tables, but at Aquarius tables we carry ourselves with a little bit of grace."
I look over at Ryder. I swear he is biting his tongue for whatever reason right now. I expect him to be a ratchet mess but instead he seems to clear his throat and just smile a little bit. Apollo is way out of line. Sure this was his table and maybe we normally didn't discuss sex with people we just met, but it wasn't that big of a deal. We were just making small talk.
Ryder kills him with kindness in a way that seems to piss Apollo off even more. Apollo has no choice but to shut up and be quiet at that moment.
Loreal leans in. The bitch seems to not have paid any attention to her own husband but is all of a sudden super intrigued by Ryder. She leans closer across the table. Maybe she just likes to flirt with guys that are interested in me. Maybe that is her thing.
"I hear...and let me know if this is crossing the line...but I hear that Ram Country is near the Valley of Scorpions. You know the Outlaw Zodiac."
"We are..." he states.
"Isn't that weird. Being so close to them?" Lloyd asks, "I mean the Scorpions don't send representatives to the Capital. They are the only Zodiac who doesn't."
I had read about the Scorpios. Clearly I didn't get too much interest from them. Of all the Zodiacs they were the only ones who didn't follow the rules of the High Liberty. They didn't follow the laws of the Liberties. Supposedly they married who they wanted to, they did what they wanted to and didn't have specific skills they trained their people to learn.
""They just don't believe in the Zodiac system. That's all that is."
"What's not to believe in?" I ask at that moment, a little confused, "The Zodiac system brought piece to the world."
"Not everyone believes that," Ryder responds.
"Everyone knows the Scorpios are terrorists. They are the Zodiac Killers..." Apollo says out of nowhere.
"Zodiac Killers?" I ask.
I had never heard the term.
"It's a terrorist group that has been attacking the Capital for a while now. Randomly," Aeron explains.
"A terrorist group consisting of Scorpions," Apollo adds in, "They are filthy fucking outlaws trying bring back the dark ages when we didn't have the Zodiac system and Astronomy was nothing more than a myth. They are trying to bring back imbalance."
I shake my head. I'm bothered by this. I'm so bothered that I don't see that Ryder is pissed off as well. He isn't upset over the Scorpions though. He's upset over Apollo. I watch when he looks at Apollo there seems to be a sense of resistance. I don't understand why he looks at him like that. He looks pissed though.
"You know any Scorpions?" Ryder asks Apollo.
"Then maybe you shouldn't talk about something you don't know," Ryder responds.
"Is there a reason you're fucking defending them?" Apollo asks.
"I'm not defending anyone. I'm just saying that maybe you should let a Scorpio come speak for himself before bashing them and their beliefs."
"Beliefs? It's terrorism," Aeron adds in on Apollo's side.
"The Aries don't agree with the Scorpions right?" Lourdes asks Ryder.
Ryder hesitates. He looks around the table.
"It isn't as black and white as you all think."
"Sure it is," Lizabeth adds in, "They are fighting the Zodiac system. That makes them a danger. That makes them unbalanced."
"At least Libras understand how dangerous that is for society," Apollo states, "Guess our friend Ryder hear doesn't want us to speak on the fact that there is a group of Zodiac Killers who want to revert us back to the ages of conflict. Maybe all those World Wars aren't taught in Ram Country."
"You people don't know what you're talking about," Ryder responds.
"Explain it," I state.
Ryder looks over at me, "Why? It's clear your friends have made up their minds."
"Anyone with half a brain cell would be able to come to the same conclusion?" Apollo argues.
Ryder gets up off the table, "Yo...are you trying be funny Aquarius?"
Apollo gets up as well. Aeron is right behind him. They don't move towards Ryder but they are letting him know that they are willing to if Ryder keeps pushing them. This turned bad really quickly. The others are clearly on Apollo's side now. They are looking at Ryder like he has three heads because he's kind of defending the terrorist group. I don't get it.
"Ryder don't..." I whisper.
"Have a nice day sir. Hopefully you don't run into a Zodiac Killer on your way home. Maybe then you'll understand how dangerous terrorism really is," Apollo shoots at him.
It's an unnecessary blow.
I look at Apollo, "Apollo stop."
"Doesn't matter. He can say what he wants. I'm leaving like I said," Ryder states.
Ryder turns. He starts walking towards the door. Then he does something I don't expect. He stands at the doorway and outstretches his hand.
"Are you coming with me or not?"
I look at Ryder. I look back at Apollo. It's awkward. I don't expect Ryder to be giving me this sort of ultimatum. But at the same time I'm really liking the fact that he actually wants me to go somewhere with him.
Apollo was way out of order. Ryder was explaining things. He was ready to explain things. Apollo didn't even give him the chance to talk. Sure I didn't agree with terrorism but I wanted to hear why Ryder didn't want the others to jump to conclusions. Ryder was protecting something and I wanted to know what.
That's when I do it. I take his hand.
We end up leaving and Ryder takes me somewhere that seems a little sketchy to say the least. Whistler stays close to me when we get to the place. It's a local dive bar in an area of the city called Oldtown. Oldtown is broken up. It seems to be like the slums of the Zodiac Capital. The bar we go into is called the Lion. I see the huge lion symbol hanging above the door. As we walk in the first thing I notice is the smell of smoke and topless women walking around. Whistler stands close by with her hand touched on her weapon ready to take out anyone that gets too close.
"Tell your murder machine she can stand down," he tells me, "You're safe. You're here with me."
I give Whistler no such order. There is a bar fight going on not too far from me. No one seems to be really interested in it. It's like an everyday thing I think.
"What is this place?" I ask.
"The Leo's own this bar. If you ever party...you party with Leo's. I tell you they know how to party. You like tits?"
"Me too. Doesn't mean I don't like tits. That's the thing about you Libras. You're so damn uptight. Here. Come here. Sit with me. Have a drink."
I sit with him and we drink a few drinks. Some of his friends come over and talk to us for a while. They are his Aries friends. He doesn't introduce me to them. I wonder if he's ashamed of me or something. It kind of hurts when they walk away drunk and he still hadn't even given them my name or acknowledged me at all.
After a while Whistler finally seems to relax. I have to watch as a couple of local girls walk up to Ryder and attempt to hit on him. With everyone that walks up to him he turns to me and asks me what sign they are. I don't think he's as good at being educated about how to tell people by their signs as I am. I know the Leos a mile away. They are mostly the ones hitting on him. Leo's are obnoxiously confident. They literally have the courage of lions. I watch as the girls walk up to him. Some literally even attempt to grab his dick through his pants.
I roll my eyes a few times watching this scene as Ryder is pulling the girls off of him. They completely ignore me. Clearly these aren't the kind of people that are attracted to me anyway. I haven't seen a Gemini or an Aquarius since I walked into this dive bar.
"You seem to be having fun," I state, "That girl across the way has been staring at you for the past hour..."
"What sign is she?" he asks.
She's a Leo. She's a slutty looking Leo at that. Her shirt is a see through shirt. Her jeans are so low that I can see parts of her underwear. She is playing with this contraption on the table that is allowing her to brew and drink her own kinds of beers within a matter of seconds. It's safe to say she's a sloppy drunk.
"I'm not helping you flirt," I respond.
"You jealous?" he asks.
"Why would I be jealous? Not like we are really emotionally attached or anything," I respond, "But that doesn't mean I'm helping you."
Ryder gives me a hard stare. I think he's trying to read me. I can tell he's drunk, but he's a happy drunk surprisingly. He has been smiling from ear to ear since he came into the Lion. It's weird seeing him somewhere where he is more comfortable.
"You need to lighten up," he says.
"Why didn't you introduce me?" I ask.
"Why didn't you introduce me to your Aries friends that came over earlier?" I ask.
He looks annoyed and confused when he shrugs," I don't know. I didn't know what to introduce you as---I guess. I didn't want to call you my friend because I feel like you would have gotten mad. Plus we aren't friends. I still kind of hate you. And I didn't want to introduce you as my husband because well...you don't feel like my husband."
"We are married."
"So what?" he asks shrugging a little bit and leaning up against the bar, "Is that all a marriage is to you? A ceremony? We aren't in love. That's what a marriage is to me. You know."
I think about it.
I shake my head, "No. I don't know. The matchmakers put us together. You're my husband. Period."
He sighs, "That's the problem. That's the problem with Society. That's why I can't get too mad at the Scorpios. Like look at us. We haven't even had sex. The only time I kissed you was when I was pretending. We don't even sleep in the same bed."
"Whose fault is that?" I ask, "I've been trying with you."
"You've been trying to be my husband," he responds, "Maybe you should try to be my friend first. And we start from there. Damn. I don't know why I'm talking to you about this. You'll never get it. I might as well be having a conversation with Whistler. This isn't going anywhere. Man. Hold on. I'll be back."
"Where the hell are you going? You're not leaving me here alone. Ryder. RYDER!"
Ryder walks away and leaves me to talk to the girl across the bar who is looking at him. I'm shocked by it. I look over at Whistler. She remains guarding me. It's not the point that I feel unsafe but the fact that he left me just pisses me off. He brought me in this fucking bar just to fucking leave me. I'm steaming. I'm so mad that I think about just walking out of this place and leaving him here. Maybe he plans on taking the Leo girl home. I have no idea.
I'm surprised when he returns however after just a few minutes, "Fix your face."
"You left me."
"But did you die. Relax. I was getting us a hook up," he says, "Open your hand."
I open my hand.
He drops a pill in it.
"What is this?"
"The Leo's call it a Roar. The Roar is the strongest drug out right now. Guaranteed to knock you on your ass. I want you to take it with me."
I stare at the pill. I'm hesitant.
"I don't do drugs."
He sighs a little bit, "I figured that much. God forbid you are knocked off balance. God forbid you lose yourself just for one night. What are you so afraid of, Law? I'm not talking about the drugs either. Just in life. Is it fear that we'll have another World War? Is it fear that Libras won't be as needed in a society that doesn't need your rules anymore?"
"I'm not scared of anything. Justice is fair. No matter where you go, she always finds you."
"If you are so sure that Justice will find you then why don't you lose yourself once in a while?"
"I don't know..."
"Man never mind."
"Wait. Give me the pill..."
The last thing I remember is taking a pill and telling Whistler that I was a little thirsty and to bring me some water. She doesn't do it though. She probably is letting me know that she isn't a slave, she's a bodyguard. She watches me and for some reason now I'm still parched. I roll over. I have the biggest fucking headache possible.
I look around.
I'm not in my room. I'm in my apartment though but not in my room.
Then I notice something else. I'm completely naked. I'm lying on sheets and the sheets are wet. They are soaked with some sort of liquid. Its sweat but it's something else too. Something sticky is all over the sheets. I'm laid in it. That's when I feel the moisture in my butt. I lower my hand at that moment to feel what is going on down there.
My hand returns and I damn near scream.
Nut. My ass is full of nut. I turn to my right and see someone else has woken up screaming because of me. He seems just as shocked to see me as I am to see him. What the fuck happened that night?
Ryder glares at me, "Did we...um...last night. I think we, well, see. My dick is um..."
It's clear. I had sex with my husband last night.
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