Date: Sat, 06 May 2000 13:56:45 EDT From: ralhsa1@yahoo.com Subject: Corey - Jeff Disclaimer: Any comments can be sent to ralhsa1@yahoo.com Jeff sat in silence watching the stony eyed boy in front of him. The boy was fair skinned and a smathering of freckles were sprinkled over his nose. His large green eyes looked everywhere but at him and he repeatedly brushed his strawberry blonde hair out of his face. He was cute and if he were not so stubborn he would be a very sweet child. They had been watching each other now for three sessions and as Jeff glanced at his watch he realized he had to tack another fifteen minutes on to that tally. Picking up some papers he looked at the boy who fidgeted. "Since we don't seem to have much to talk about I am going to catch up on some paperwork. I get a little behind from time to time, because everyone else likes to talk to me." The little boy didn't say anything he stared stoically at the wall. Jeff shook his head, he had never seen such a stubborn little boy. Most of them opened up and started talking in a few minutes or two sessions at the most, but never like this. Sighing he began to fill out some forms when the ringing of the telephone startled him. Frowning he let it ring twice more before he picked it up. "Hello Jeff, I know you don't like to be interrupted during your sessions but there is a boy here at the desk and he is insisting he has to see you. He says its an emergency and you will be very glad to see him. He seems very upset." The voice on the phone was from his receptionist Donna. She was a sweet petite woman who had worked for him for five years now. Thinking for a moment he looked at the boy, who was watching him with interest. "Tell him to have a seat and I will be with him in a few minutes." Donna's soft voice replied, "Okay, I am sorry but I wasn't sure what to do but call you." Jeff laughed, "Okay thanks Donna. See you in a few minutes." Jeff stood up and stretched, "Something has come up. I have a little boy who really needs to see me and since we aren't talking I think it would be a good idea for me to see this other little boy." The little boy looked upset, "But it's my time." Jeff was surprised by his protest. "Well its your time if you use it. If you talk to me then its your time because you need me, but so far you haven't and something important has come up. If you promise to talk to me I will schedule you some extra time to make up for it but not unless you promise to talk." The little boy thought about it and nodded, "Just for me time and you won't yell at me?" Jeff nodded at him. "I promise." Leading the little boy out to the waiting room he looked at the two figures sitting in the corner. Both were dressed identically in long black robes, similar to a priest's cassock right down to the hoods which covered their heads. "Donna scheduled Joey here for an hour and a half for his next visit. Seems he is going to talk to me next time." He smiled and ruffled the boy's hair. Then he turned to the two figures in the corner. One of the figures had stood up, drawn the black hood off his head, and he stood watching Jeff nervously. "Hi Jeff, do you remember me?" Jeff stood in silent shock staring at a face that jumped out at him from the past. For a moment he wondered if he was actually there. The harsh white light fell on a fragile, too thin face. His snow white skin stood out in harsh contrast to the soft velvet black robe he wore. Large almond shaped silver eyes that were bright watched Jeff eagerly and hopeful that he had not faded into nothingness over the years. He fingered the end of a silver white braid that held his hair off of his face. "Raleigh?" he asked softly still not believing his eyes. Raleigh's face brightened into a wide smile and he nodded. "Yep its me. I have come back." The second figure had stood up by this time and turned to face Jeff. He looked alot like Raleigh in facial features and his build, so much so that Jeff figured that they were related. Unlike Raleigh he had black hair, no Jeff thought to himself, it was blue black and hung loose. His almond eyes were dark brown and cold they were not warm as he expected. They were also hostile and he gazed at Jeff with open distaste. Jeff decided to make the first move in this and he held his hand out to the dark haired man. "Hello I am Jeffrey Davit and I used to be Raleigh's counselor." The dark haired man did not reply but stared at his hand in the same open distaste as he had before. Jeff withdrew his hand and looked at Raleigh. " Come on back to the office and we can talk. I am eager to know what's been going on." Raleigh winced as he turned to his companion, speaking to him in a rich lilting but unknown language. It sounded a little like French but he didn't recognize any of the words. The reply that followed was sharp and whatever he said didn't sound like something very nice. Raleigh winced and bowing his head he nodded. "Okay let's go talk." Raleigh's enthusiasm had been put into check but only momentarily. The moment Jeff got Raleigh into the office he drew the fragile boy into his arms. Raleigh stiffened for a moment then he hugged him back as fiercely as Jeff hugged him. The second figure who had been watching this reprimanded Raleigh in a harsh tone that made him immediately pull away and stare at the floor. "This is my Master Nashaul he is eager to be on his way. He doesn't like Hu... people and.." Very uncomfortable and at a loss for words he looked to Nashaul for help. Nashual however offered him none as he stood there staring at him. Then he spoke sharply and held out a box and a thick book. Raleigh didn't immediately take them and so Nashaul thrust them at him. Then turning to Jeff he said, "We came looking for you, Arija has found you and I am leaving now." He turned then to Raleigh and in the same lilting language and sharp tone said, "You know what you are supposed to do this week and I expect it to be done. I trust that you can take care of yourself for the week. I will return for you in seven sun turns." Raleigh looked stricken "What will I do?" Nashaul shrugged, "That is up to you. I care not. If I can not trust you alone for a week then what am I to think of you? I trust you will NOT disappoint me." Jeff watched this exchange and decided he didn't like this at all. Then Nashaul suddenly turned and walked out of the office. Raleigh stared at the box and the book in his hand and sighed his fear showing on his small face. Getting up Jeff knelt before Raleigh, "What's going on? What was that all about?" Raleigh bit his lip, "He is leaving for the week and I am going to be alone for it. That's all nothing big." Jeff was stunned and silent and he needed to get a hold of things. He had no doubts that this was the same little boy he had cared for so long ago. For three years Raleigh had been under his care at summer camp, counseling, and even for weekends and one night a week after school. His mother had determined that under Jeffrey's care Raleigh was growing and changing. His erratic behavior had become manageable, his closed attitude, and his extreme social isolation had all changed for the better. Jeff held the success with Raleigh to a few different things. One was the attention he gave to him, taking him places, showing him things and teaching him that he had worth and he was important. Raleigh was ten when he vanished without a trace. The only one who knew what had happened to him was his brother Carmen. Carmen had insisted that a man on a black unicorn had taken him through a hole in air. Even after two years of questioning nothing had changed and Carmen still insisted that was what had happened to him. Infact to this day he still insisted the same thing. For a long time he was under suspicion of possibly killing Raleigh but his body had never been found and eventually people had stopped asking and looking for him, but Jeff never had. As hard as it seemed to be Raleigh was here and he was almost exactly the same as when he left. The only problem was Raleigh had been gone almost thirteen years. Surprisingly this was one of the last things on his mind. "He can't just abandon you to your own devices for a week." Raleigh looked up at Jeff in amusement. "He can do whatever he wants. No one tells Nashaul what to do if they know what's good for them. Besides he is gone and for awhile everything is okay. Its better for me to be alone than..." His voice trailed off into silence. "Than what, Rah?" Raleigh shook his head. "You look the same." Jeff laughed, "So do you surprisingly. How old are you now?" Raleigh pursed his lips, "I am thirteen now." Jeff blinked surprised, "Do you know that Carmen is twenty-three and you should be too." Raleigh shook his head. "If I were here I would be in your years sure but I would still be thirteen in my years. I would still be a child because I am not human like you or Carmen." His demeanor was simple, and his tone was matter of fact, straight forward, as though he had always known and Jeff should know as well. "This is too complex right now and I am not worried about it. Right now I am more worried about you being alone." Raleigh looked up, "I could stay with Sharon and David and my brother." Jeff shook his head, "Raleigh, you have been gone for a very long time Sharon and David were divorced about three years after you disappeared. Sharon got custody of Carmen and they moved to Reading Pennsylvania. Carmen is in med. school right now. I heard from them about two weeks ago. David is in California and has remarried, but I haven't heard from him. I can only tell you what Carmen has mentioned in his letters." Raleigh stood quietly. "I didn't think anything would have changed here." Jeff smiled, "I know what you mean. Home is not supposed to change even if you have been gone a hundred years, its supposed to be the same." Raleigh sighed, "This isn't home and never will be, but I never expected it to change just the same." Jeff looked away for a long moment and Raleigh took the opportunity to sit down as his hip was beginning to ache. Jeff was still looking at the tan wall when he said, "Your room, at my place, is still the same as when you left it." Raleigh looked at him silently for a moment, "Are all the stars still on the ceiling?" Jeffrey laughed, "Yes they are all still there although over time I have had to replace some but they are all there." Raleigh almost laughed, "I remember how long it took to map out the sky on the ceiling but it was fun." Jeff agreed, "It was fun. So would you consider staying with me for the week?" Raleigh was quiet and he nodded, "Okay but I have to show you something first." Jeff sat down next to him and smiled, "Okay what would you like to show me?" Raleigh put the box that Nashaul had shoved at him on Jeff's desk and opening it he stepped back to allow Jeff to see. Leaning forward Jeff looked up at Raleigh, "Its an empty box." Raleigh looked into it and sighed. "Come on Orca, show yourself you are making me look quite the fool." There was a sharp whistle followed by a few clicks and Jeff looked curiously at the box. "She's uhmm being stubborn." Picking up the box Raleigh turned it over and there was an audible thump as something hit the desk. This thud was followed by a small winged lizard, which appeared suddenly and out of thin air. It wasn't very large only about a foot tall with a wing span of maybe three feet. It was a solid white that appeared to be irridescent in the light. Its large green eyes looked at him and it chattered at him annoyed. It stood on its hind legs balancing easily as a bird and it reminded him of a mix between a tiny dinosaur with wings and some kind of exotic bird. Jeff backed away from the animal. "My God, what in the Hell is that?" Raleigh smiled, held out his arm, and let the creature scramble up on to his shoulder. "It's a Flicker Flame one of the smallest dragons on my world. She won't hurt you and normally she is alot nicer but she has had her nap interrupted so you will have to forgive her. Her name is Orca and she is my familiar." Jeff looked at Raleigh and the only thing he could think to say was, "Is it house broken?" Raleigh nodded, "If it weren't then Nashaul would have put an end to her along time ago." For right now Jeff had too many questions and things were too complicated for him to work out here. He just wanted to get Raleigh home where he could really talk to him. "Well did you bring anything with you?" Raleigh looked at him a bit confused. "I brought Orca with me and my book." Jeff looked at his black robe which, was tied around his waist by a silver corded belt. "Did you bring any other clothing?" Raleigh shook his head, "No I just wear this all the time, Why?" Jeff shrugged, "I don't care what you wear but if we go anywhere you will have to get used to being stared at. People don't dress like that here but we'll worry about that later, right now lets just go home and we can talk there." The trip to Jeff's place was silent as both of them were lost in their own thoughts. As they pulled up to the house Raleigh smiled happily. "Its exactly the way I remember it." Jeff smiled, "What can I say? I am a predictable creature of habit who does not like change." Raleigh got out of the car and followed him up to the porch and Jeff unlocked the door to let Raleigh go in first as he kept a wary eye on the lizard who was once more perched on Raleigh's shoulder. Raleigh smiled as he entered the hallway and looked around. He was happy here, as happy as he had been anywhere in this world and he was certainly happier here than he was in his own world. One of the reasons he loved this place was because everything in it reflected Jeff's love of crystal and anything that was tasteful, fragile and elegant. Those tastes were very similar to his own. In the hallway was a mirror and etched on it was a delicate flower spray. Beside the door that led into the livingroom was a waist high table where he tossed his keys and his mail. Walking into the livingroom he sat down and watched Raleigh investigate the room. "Everything is the same but the wolf piece is different and so are the unicorns." He pointed to two book ends which were crystal and had captured the fanciful prance of a carefree unicorn. Jeff nodded. "I got those a few years ago. The wolf I got just after you left. I have gotten a few other new pieces but they are in other rooms. Here I want to show you something I got just after you left." Jeff got up and went down another small hallway to a room and curiously Raleigh waited for him. When he came out again he was carrying a silver picture frame. "I was going through some pictures and I found this one," He held out the silver frame to him and Raleigh nearly dropped it. It was a picture that had been taken on one of the trips he had earned with his points. That time he wanted to go to a `real zoo' and so Jeff had taken him to one. They had had a rare white tiger cub and were giving a talk about rare and endangered animals. Raleigh had gone down to the front of the group and sat down to watch. At the end of the demonstration they picked a child to hold the cub and that lucky child had been Raleigh. He was excited but at that time Raleigh rarely showed how he felt. So he had climbed up on the table and they had placed the cub in his lap. The cub had stuck his nose in Raleigh's face and looked at him curiously and then it had licked him. Jeff had just managed to catch the moment on camera and Raleigh's rare laughter that came with it. "I took the negative and had it enlarged into an eight by ten. It took me months to find the frame to go with it." The frame was a dragon that coiled in around itself. The head of the dragon was crafted so that it looked as though the dragon were looking at the picture. Its bright eyes were crafted out of crystal and they sparkled in the afternoon sunlight that streamed in through the bay window. "Wow I had forgotten about that. That cub was one of the neatest things I had ever seen and it was so soft." Jeff took the picture and looked at it, "Yeah you were so happy and you laughed. I was so glad I caught that laugh it was such a rare thing back then and it looks like it is again." Raleigh didn't reply but suddenly looked around. "Where's Orca?" A chirp answered him almost immediately and Raleigh frowned as he spotted her curled up on a soft hand embroidered pillow. "Orca get off of there. You aren't allowed on the furniture." Jeff looked over at her, "Oh she is fine. Its not like she is going to shed on it." Raleigh looked at Orca again, "Okay." Jeff took the picture back into his room and placed it on the night stand. Raleigh followed him and looked around the rose colored room. The light tan wallpaper with its tiny pink and rose colored roses gave way to a rose carpet and with a matching bedspread and curtains it was a lovely room. The four poster bed matching dresser, bookcase, and nightstand were all oak. Jeff sat down on the bed and patted his lap. Raleigh hesitated and then sat down beside Jeff and after a moment longer he climbed onto his lap. Jeff hugged him tightly, "I have missed you so much over these years." Raleigh was quiet and didn't reply to him. "Tell me about your friend that you came with." Raleigh looked up at him clearly puzzled. "My friend? Do you mean Orca?" Jeff shook his head, "I would like to know about her too but I was thinking about the man you came with. Is he your father or perhaps a relation to you, maybe a friend?" Raleigh shook his head. "Nashaul is none of those things. He is my Master, unlike most places in this world mine has no problem with buying and selling people." Jeff looked at him speechless and silence fell for a long moment. "How did this come about?", he asked. Raleigh shifted uncomfortably, "Well when I went home with my father things didn't work out. I thought I was going home to stay and for a short time I was living with my father. Then, like before, he got rid of me. He took me to the Land Elves and had me purchased and the buyer was Nashaul. My father he got rid of me for a good reason..." sighing he looked into the mirror that sat on the dresser. "I was making everyone sick; I mean physically sick. Nashaul is a skilled herbalist and a mage. He saw that I had potential as a mage and because I get sick so easily and so readily he found that I would help him in his work." "What do you mean `help him with his work'?" Raleigh looked from his reflection to the floor, "He made me sick and then would try different things to make me well. When I am well he teaches me magic and I stay out of his way. That part is easy because he gives me more than enough to keep me out of his way." Jeff wasn't sure what to think of what Raleigh was telling him but he was worried about him. "How does he make you sick?" Raleigh trembled in his arms and then slid onto the floor. "Can we..." Raleigh looked around, his words failing him he went into the livingroom and took refuge in the corner between the couch, the endtable and the wall. Jeff looked at Raleigh and sighed. "Hey, want to go out and have some pizza or something? We don't have to talk anymore. This is our week and we have so much time to catch up on." Raleigh looked up from his place and shook his head, "I am tired and I want to lay down. Is that okay?" Jeff smiled at him, "I will order some for dinner." Raleigh's voice lacked any enthusiasm, "Sure that would be great." Getting up he went down the hall to the room across from Jeff's and went in. Raleigh was, greeted by the same thick blue carpet and white walls that he remembered from so long ago. The same pictures of dragons and unicorns were hung on the wall. A new mirror hung on the wall with a finely etched unicorn on a cliff and above the rearing unicorn was a dragon in full attack position. The frame around it was finished in a dark cherry stain which was a hair darker than the rest of the room's furnishing. Raleigh looked at the tiny rainbows which were cast by the various faceted crystals that hung in the windows. Raleigh went over to the window and fingered one that had been cut into the shape of a star. He then sat down on the bed and kicked his black soft leather shoes off and laid down. He smiled at the glow in the dark stars that decorated the ceiling and he sighed. Curling up on the bed he closed his eyes. He was tired and he wasn't feeling too well. Sleep came to him after awhile but it was a restless and disturbed sleep that didn't last long at all. Finally he got up and wandered out into the livingroom where Jeff was on the phone. Jeff smiled at him and Raleigh sat down on the couch. Orca chirped and climbed up onto his shoulder. She chirped and after a moment Raleigh got up and let her outside. Jeff had hung up and looked at him. "You didn't sleep too well did you?" Raleigh shook his head, "It's okay I rarely do." Jeff sighed softly, "You hungry?" Raleigh shook his head again, "No but I am thirsty." Jeff smiled and got him a glass of orange juice. Raleigh thanked him as he drank some of it. "You let me know when you are hungry and I will order us some dinner, okay?" Raleigh nodded. The evening passed very slowly for Raleigh he was quiet and self evolved. Jeff was worried but didn't say anything for fear that he would further upset him. It was a little after eight when exhaustion claimed Raleigh in the midst of a movie Jeff had put on for them. Jeff smiled as he watched Raleigh sleep and after the movie ended he gently picked him up and carried him back to the guest room. Tucking him in Jeff quietly closed the door. When Jeff turned he almost laughed as he caught sight of Raleigh's little dragon trying with all her might to pull the embroidered pillow down the hall to Raleigh's room. All four of her clawed feet were dug into the carpet, everyone of her little muscles strained. Laughing Jeff picked the pillow up and gently shook it as Orca held on with all her might. Taking them both he dropped them onto the bed where Orca climbed up on top of it and whistled softly at him. "You are welcome." He said with a grin as he once more closed the door. Jeff sat straight up as a cry of panic yanked him out of a sound sleep. Looking around for a moment he jumped out of bed and headed to the guest room. Raleigh was sitting up in bed his knees to his chest shivering. He had wrapped himself up tightly in his blanket. He looked at Jeff with wide, spooked eyes when he came in. "You okay?" he asked sitting down and hugging Raleigh to him. Raleigh pulled away from him. "Yes I am okay. I am sorry I woke you up." Jeff sighed, "Don't worry about it. So what was your dream about?" Raleigh laid down and shook his head. "I don't want to talk about it." Jeff smoothed Raleigh's hair, "The only way I can help you is if you talk to me." Raleigh looked up at him, "I don't need help." Jeff hugged him. "Tomorrow I have to go to the mall and pick up a gift for my ex-wife and then drop it off. After that I want you and I to go and do something together. Would you like that?" Raleigh nodded. "Raleigh are you sure you don't want to talk about this?" Once more Raleigh nodded. "Okay, if you do I am here for you." Raleigh gave a small short lived smile as he hugged him gently. Kissing his forehead he got up. "Would you like me to leave the door open?" Raleigh shook his head and rolled over onto his side. Gently closing the door he went back to his own room but it wasn't very much later when Raleigh came in and carefully climbed into bed with him. Jeff let him snuggle against him. Raleigh woke up and looked around himself confused for a moment. Slowly he recalled what was going on and where he was. He could hear Jeff on the phone and the clatter of dishes as he made breakfast. Raleigh got up and wandered out into the livingroom and then the kitchen. Orca was nowhere to be seen so he figured she was sunbathing in one of Jeff's bay windows. Sitting down at the table he watched Jeff mix some egg mixture which he then poured into a skillet adding along with it some meat and cheese. "I know but I really need to do this. You know I would have made arrangements before hand otherwise. Just call up everyone you can and reschedule or just shift them over to Brian if he can take them. I will be in next Monday..." He turned smiling at Raleigh he poured him a glass of juice. "All right, I will keep my pager on and take care. See you in a week." He hung up and turned to Raleigh, "Morning, you hungry?" Raleigh shook his head. "Okay well you have got to eat even if its just a little so will you try?" He put some of the eggs on a plate and set them in front of Raleigh. Taking some himself he sat down across from him. "I took some time off work so we could do things together and one of the things I want to do is talk with you about what's his name." Raleigh didn't do anything but continue to pick bits of meat out of his eggs and make a neat pile with them. "What if I don't want to talk to anyone about it?" Raleigh's question wasn't one that he wanted answered because it was more of a statement than a question. "Raleigh are you happy?" Clearly puzzled Raleigh looked up from his plate. "Happy?", he questioned. "Yeah happy as in, gee I feel great today... top of the world... You know not feeling like you wish the world would end or the ground would just swallow you whole." Raleigh looked at his plate then at the pale blue wall behind Jeff. "No I am not happy but I am not sad either. Although I do wish the world would end and I do wish I were anywhere but here, and I mean here as in alive not physical location. You want to know what I think, Jeff. How I see things?" Jeff didn't like the hollow empty tone in his voice. Jeff nodded, "Yeah Rah, tell me." His voice was soft and, he hoped, even. Raleigh continued to look off into the distance almost as if there were no walls between him and the horizon. The answer that came was plain and simple. It was straight foward and so cutting Jeff winced. Raleigh's voice wasn't angry it wasn't bitter but rather he was tired and he sounded old. He sounded far older than he should have at his young age. "I simply exist. I am waiting to die plain and simple and when I do then I will happy. Until then I won't be so don't ask." With that he got up and went into the livingroom followed by Jeff. "If that is not being depressed I certainly don't want to encounter true depression." Raleigh didn't say anything in return. "What happened to you when you went home? I know you were sold to the man you came with and he made you sick but that's all I know." Raleigh fingered the fringe on one of the pillows on the couch. Then taking the pillow he hugged it to his chest drawing his knees against the pillow he buried his face into it. After a moment he looked up but not at Jeff. "I remember the first time I met Nashaul he had just purchased me and my father had just abandoned me to him. I had a bag with some odds and ends I managed to collect while I was home. It was petty magic but none the less it was important to me. I didn't understand them and their secrets were Suns to me." Jeff didn't know what Suns were but he wasn't going to inturrupt him to ask. Instead he picked up a peice of paper and a pen and wrote suns and beside it he put a question mark so he could ask about it later. "He waited until we were away from the market and then he said to me that I was his from then on and I had better get used to it. I was surprised because he spoke English and no one else did and I was relieved. I mean finally, I had someone I could understand. He told me that I had a weak body system and that's what he was looking for. He also told me that if I got sick it took me a long time to get over it and even if I did chances were I would get sick with the samething again. Nashaul said that was great because no matter how much I got something I would and could get it again. I didn't understand why this was important because I could have told him the same thing but he seemed happy about this discovery. Anyway he told me he was not only interrested in that but why my people have such a tolerence for things that are poisionous to other races. He told me that I would help him with all that. He said my place with him was to help him figure these things out." Raleigh looked far away again his eyes unfocused as though he could see something no one else could. "When we got to Nashaul's place he made it clear what my role was. He took me to the basement and put me in a room. There was nothing at all in this room just bare walls and floor all made of stone. It was very cold and he would not allow me to have my things. He told me I belonged to him and I wouldn't need them. Instead he gave me a book and told me I should cultivate my talent for magic. Well I had no idea what to do with a book I couldn't read. I don't know how long I was there before he said I would learn to read and write and help him with his research wether I liked it or not. Thus things began." Jeff looked at him waiting for him to continue and it wasn't long before he did. "He came down and gave me a blanket which I was glad for, then he left and returned with a chair and began to teach me the basics of my language. It was a very painful lesson because he had no patience with me. By the end of it I was in tears and I hurt because he liked to hit when he didn't care where he hit. When he got angry enough he left and for a long time he didn't come back and when he did he had a bowl of soup and some juice. He told me I would eat it if he had to feed it to me. At that time I didn't have a problem with it but after I had eaten it I was sick, really sick." Jeff bit his lip, "Do you know what it was that he gave you?" Raleigh shook his head, "No but I was sick for a very long time and all I remember was not being able to move and being stung like stung by a bee. Mostly that was what things were like for me, being sick in the dark, always hungry and tired, and when I wasn't sick I was being hurt for being stupid. Then not to long ago maybe a month he began to let me sleep and eat. He didn't make me sick and I learned more in the last month from him than any other time. Then he announced we were coming here and I was going with him. I don't know why he wanted me to come or why he descided I was going to be alone. He told me that if I tried to leave him he would find me and I would be very sorry I had even been born. I dared to ask him if I could look you up and he agreed, again I don't know why but here I am. I think he is hurting me in another way by showing me this place again. Allowing me to see what I can't have. No one here is the same and I am now alone because time here has moved on without me. I mean it would have anyway but at least I would have been apart of that time. Since I was not allowed that then I no more belong here then I did then. Its a cruel lesson that he knew. I can't leave him because of the simple fact I have no where to be and nowhere to go. Like I said I exist and I am just waiting to die." A long silence fell before Jeff soke again, "Were you ever allowed to go outside?" Raleigh shook his head, "Not alone and most of the time when I was allowed I was sick, either from lack of food and sleep or from whatever he would give me to make me sick." Jeff sighed, "God thirteen years of that... what or how did you make it?" Raleigh shook his head, "It was only three years, remember my time is different from yours. I was sure I wasn't going to die because I would never be so lucky as for that happen. Believe me I wished for it and I cried for it sometimes and then I just turned it off. I gave up on wishing for death and at the same time I gave up on it ever happening. I knew whatever was happening to me was a punishment and that was it plain and simple." Jeff shook his head, "No it wasn't a punishment, it was torture. You went home to be a lab rat." Raleigh unfolded from the couch, dropping the pillow to the floor, and went to the window. Looking up at the sky he sighed, "Nashaul told me once, during a rare time when I was getting well and he was nice to me, that I had to find my nitch in the world. He said I had to settle into that nitch and never look beyond it and if I did look beyond it that I would only be hurt to find that which I could never have. He said that I was lucky because I had someone who had found that nitch for me and knew what was good for me. He told me that I was best off here and this is what I was made for. He said I was helping all other races and that was what I was to do even if I died in the process. I have no doubts that when I go back the same will happen and I will die." Raleigh turned from the window the morning sun made his white hair golden and his eyes were now the color of a spring morning. "I am not scared at all and infact I want it because I know Nashaul was wrong. He isn't my nitch that cold bare room isn't either but death is and I will be very happy then. I will be where I belong which, is a place where I am away from everything, everyone, including myself." Jeff watched Raleigh and he shook his head. The silence was long and then it was shattered by the ringing of the phone. Taking the opportunity he went outside into the bright sun and he shivered in the morning air, eventhough it was mid August. He drew his robe close around him and looked at the world around him. Orca landed on his shoulder and Raleigh rubbed her back. A moment later Jeff joined him. "Why don't we go and pick up that gift and get you something different to wear. Then I will drop the gift off to my ex and we can go meet a friend of mine for lunch." Raleigh looked around and gave a little nod. Jeff led him into the house, "You go and get ready." Raleigh did as he was told. Once he was in his room he took down his braid and picking up a brush he began to run it through his hair. Orca chirped at him, then she curled up on a pillow and began to clean herself in the manner that a cat would. Deftly Raleigh rebraided his hair and replaced the ribbon with a rubberband from a container on the desk. Then sitting down he took the silver corded belt from his waist, taking the pouches off of it he laid them on the desk. He retied the belt tucking into only a black square hankercheif with a silver border. Around his thin wrist he slipped a copper wire bracelet that held a beautiful Tiger's Eye. Then looking at his reflection in the mirror he straghtened his robe and went to meet Jeff in the livingroom. Jeff smiled and picking up his keys he led Raleigh out to the car. "Orca should be okay she was cleaning herself in my room. She will probably sleep today since she didn't last night." Jeff nodded as he backed out of the driveway. "She won't get into anything will she?" Raleigh shrugged, "I don't know. She is curious but I don't think she will." Jeff was quiet and Raleigh watched the sceanery go by. Raleigh had always been self absorbed but when he had left thirteen years ago he was happy and recovering. He laughed and played he had even been more open about what he was thinking, feeling and what questions were weighing heavilly on his mind, but now it looked like he had lost all of those abilities and Jeff didn't know what to do. When they pulled up to the mall Raleigh hesitated before getting out. He was extremely stressed and his heditation showed it. He did not want to be seen, curious about what Raleigh would do next Jeff watched him. Slowly Raleigh got out of the car and stood in the parking lot with one hand on the door. He looked at Jeff and then at the mall behind him. "Could I wait here in the car?" Although he didn't voice the question it was clearly being asked in his body language, his clenched hand, his stiff posture and his worried eyes. "Come on Rah, it will be okay." With a last look at the car he shut the door and followed Jeff. The mall wasn't very crowded since it was Thursday morning and Jeff figured that was good. As they entered the glass doors Raleigh fixed his attention on the tiles of the floor. He didn't look up from the floor even when Jeff spoke to him. Raleigh imagined that everone in this place was staring at him and he was partially right. Anyone he passed looked at him curiously, except for some teen kids who were just hanging out and probably playing hookie from summer school. Dressed in black and having painted their skin white they looked alot like Raleigh except for they wore alot of lace and had painted strange black lines across their face. One, a girl caught sight of Raleigh and stared at him. She nudged a guy next to her. "Hey look at the kid." The guy turned and looked. "Yeah what about..." He paused and looked at his companion. "You feel it too don't you?" Her harsh wisper only drew a nod from him. "Should we talk to him?" The man nodded, "Not right now though, he is frightened and very upset. You can tell by how he is standing. Lets just follow him and see what happens." Raleigh unlike Jeff had noticed the girl and her three friends and it was her stare that caused him to finally look up from the floor but only briefly. "What kind of clothing do you like?" Raleigh shrugged, "I don't know. I am not picky with what I wear." Jeff looked at him and then picked out a few button down shirts in light blue, yellow, and tan then he took him to the pants section and picked out some nice pants to go with them. The shirts were no problem since they came in small but pants however took a bit of looking. After finding a few pairs in the junios section that fit him, he paid for them and had Raleigh change into the new clothes. Now that he was dressed in a pair of kahki slacks and a pale blue shirt he no longer stuck out as much and he felt like he fit in a bit more. Venturing a look around he sighed to find no one was watching him. Jeff next took him to his favorite store in the mall and as they went in it was plain to raleigh why it was his favorite. Everything in this store was made of porciline, crystal, spun glass or some other fagile material. Raleigh was amazed by the many items that sparkled in glass display cases. He walked to one that held various figurines made of spun glass. "You like this store?" Raleigh looked up at Jeff and grinned. "Yes, it's got lots of beautiful things." Jeff patted his shoulder. "You look around while I pick up the gift and have it wrapped. If you see something you like let me know okay?" Raleigh nodded. While Jeff had gone to talk to a clerk Raleigh continued to look around the store. The girl he had seen earlier had followed them into the store as well. She took a feigned intrest in a case that held collector edition Disney figurines. She looked at Raleigh from the corner of her eye, she noted his features and smiled to herself. "Hello" Raleigh looked up startled by the unfamiliar voice he took a step backwards, tripping over a box beind him he fell. Crying out at the sharp pain that traveled both down his leg and up his back he grabbed at something to catch himself. Unfortunately the thing he grabbed was not a shelf, but the delicate angel that was sitting on it. His cry of pain was oddly intermingled with the breaking of fine pourceline. The girl knelt down and helped him up. Raleigh's face reflected fear, anguish and pain. Jeff was next to arrive. "You alright Raleigh? What happened?" Raleigh couldn't answer as he stood staring at the ground. He held his weight off his leg silently he trembled and when Jeff came close to him and reached out to touch him Raleigh put his hands up as if to protect himself from a blow to the face. "I am sorry I startled him and he tripped over that box. It was an accident and he hadn't meant for it to happen. Its my fault I scared him" The shopkeeper was furious but not with Raleigh or the Gothic girl but rather with the clerk who had placed the box in the isle. Jeff ignored them all and led Raleigh to a bench outside the store. "You okay?" Raleigh, evethough he whimpered with each step nodded and limping badly he sat wincing. "Wait here for me and I will be right back to talk to you, then we will go to the doctor. I want to have you looked at." Raleigh didn't give any responce to Jeff except to say, "I didn't mean to break it." Jeff nodded, "I know and you are not in any trouble and no one is going to hurt you." The Gothic girl came out and sat down next to him. "Are you alright?" Raleigh nodded silently. "I am Lydia. I am sorry I scared you. I just wanted to talk to you." Raleigh remained silent he just stared at the floor. "Your dad says he is going to pay for the angel eventhough it was an accident. The shopkeeper says he doesn't have to and is giving him credit for it." Raleigh looked at her, "He isn't my father. He is my friend." Lydia looked towards the store again. "What's your name?" Raleigh looked at her, "I am Raleigh." Raleigh looked down again. "You aren't from around here are you?" Raleigh didn't respond. He was relieved when Jeff came back out. Raleigh stood up holding his weight on his other leg. Fresh tears streamed down his cheeks as his pain sprang up fresh and new. "Are you okay to walk?" Raleigh nodded and slowly walked with Jeff resisting any help at all. When they got to the car he greatfully got into it. Jeff set his box on the seat and got in beside him. "What did the girl say to you that frightened you?" Raleigh looked up, "Nothing I just didn't expect someone to be so close to me. I don't like strange people near me it makes me nervous. She was nice to me." "I don't need a doctor. I will be okay I just hurt a little now." Jeff looked over at him. "You sure?" Raleigh nodded, "I am sorry I broke that statue." Jeff smiled, "Its all right I know it was an accident and accidents happen to everyone. That's why I was not and are not angry with you. Even if I were mad at you I want you to know I would never raise a hand to you with an intent to hit you or hurt you. I believe there are better ways of dealing with things than hurting someone over them. I hope you believe me about this because it's important that you do." Raleigh looked up, "I believe you. I am just used to it and I thought it would happen again." Jeff patted his knee. "Its alright. I can understand why you would." Backing out of the parking space he got onto the highway. "Next stop my ex wives house." Raleigh sat in silence thinking of the events so far today. Yawning he laid his head against the door and closed his eyes. It was a good half hour before Jeff pulled up at a small brick home with white shutters on the windows. "Would you like to come in with me?" Raleigh looked at the house and then at the cars parked infront of them. "Can I wait here? I am tired and I really don't want to be with more strange people." Jeff nodded, "Yeah this won't take to long and I will bring you a peice of cake." Raleigh attempted to smile but it was short lived. "Be back in a few minutes." Taking the box with him he watched as Jeff went up to the door. Then he laid against the door and drifted off into a light sleep. Jeff knocked on the door and in a moment; he was greeted by a brown haired girl. "Daddy! What are you doing here?" Jeff hugged her tightly, "Hi Breeze I came to wish your mom a happy birthday. Is she here?" Breeze grinned broadly her hazel eyes spakling. "Yeah, everyone is here even Chris." Jeff's smile faded some as he realized `everyone' meant not only his son Chris, his Ex wife Charlotte, and Breeze, it also meant Brian his wife's boyfriend, and her sister Karen were here as well. Sighing he followed his daughter into the house. He found Charlotte in the kitchen sitting at the table. "Jeff, what are you doing here? I didn't expect you until tonight. Why aren't you at work?" Charlotte was a small woman with green eyes and auburn hair. She was a generally happy woman with a viscious temper when she got angry. "I brought you a gift happy birthday. Where is Chris? Breeze said he was here. Oh as for work I took a week off." Charlotte's look of surprise did not go unnoticed. "You took time off daddy?" Breeze asked coming into the kitchen. "Yeah I descided I needed a vacation." Breeze got a piece of cake and set it down in front of him. "Chris said he doesn't want to see you. I told him you wanted to see him but he said to go jump in a lake." Jeff marvelled at the candor of his sixteen year old daughter. Want someone to tell you the truth as plainly as possible you could always count on Breeze to do just that. It was at that moment Karen came in the room. Her stringy black hair and her face which, always reminded Jeff of a rotting pumpkin wearing a black mop, looked at him. "Bree go help your brother with dinner." Making a face she got up, "Come say bye to me okay daddy?" Jeff smiled, "Sure thing honey. I won't be here too long I have alot to do." Karen scowled at him. "Why do you insist on coming over here? After what you did to this family you should just stay the Hell away from here." Jeff looked up at her. "You have no idea what you are talking about. You have no idea what happened with this family." He kept his voice low and he tried to keep his voice and anger in check. "I know more than you think. I have talked to people and more importantly I talked to Chris. I know what went on between you and him, and I know why you took on all those hours at your work." Jeff stood, "I don't know what you are insinuating but I would be careful about what you say." Karen didn't say anything in reply to this warning and Jeff hated her smug expression but he didn't show it. As much as he hated to Jeff had to be careful the last thing he needed was to have an investigation on his hands so he kept quiet nd hid his worries and his fears. Karen watched him and seeing she had put Jeff securly inhis place she turned and walked out of the kitchen. Charlotte chose that moment to make her way into the kitchen where she plopped herself down and smiled up at him. "I didn't come for long, just enough to say hello and wish you a happy birthday. I came to see the kids to but Chris has gone and Breeze well, I don't want to put her in the position of getting the third degree from Karen. " Charlotte was quiet for a moment, "She is just being careful with the children that's all and you can't blame her for that. Everytime you come it upsets Chris for days she just hates to see him like that. We all do. For him to find out that you took time off is hard too. I mean you never have before and suddenly you have. It raises questions that none of us want to talk about. Especially when there is a boy sleeping in your car." Jeff was quiet for a moment, "He didn't want to come in so he stayed there…." His voice trailed off as Charlotte cut him off, "Look I appreciate you coming over to say happy birthday, to see the kids and let us know that you are still around and doing alright for yourself. I think its time for you to go." Jeff sighed, "I was thinking the same thing. Let me say good-bye to Bree and Chris.." Charlotte cut him off again. "No I will tell them just go." Jeff nodded. "Yeah, take care and tell the kids I love them." Charlottes watched him leave and sighed thinking as she often did, that she had lost a husband only to gain a brother. Raieigh awoke with a start when Jeff closed the car door.