I lay there on my back, staring at the ceiling. My body felt as though it had been 'vibrating' for the last several hours. My fingers and toes were numb, my lips and face feeling shaken. I rolled over onto my belly to feel an ample amount of fresh semen soaked into my boxers. I caught a violent shiver as the sensitive tip of my shaft touched the mattress, and memories of experiencing a series of mind blowing sexual interludes with Caleb over the last few hours, the most recent just before opening my eyes, flooded my mixed up conscious.
It was like I could still feel his slim and sleek body against me, the smooth surface of his warm teen flesh sliding against my own. I could still smell his pheromone fragrance on me. Still taste his juicy essence in my mouth. And while I may have been fully aware that I was 'forced' into doing it...he had affected my mind in such a way that I almost...missed his touch. Memories of good times that never happened were shoved into my thoughts against my will...and my emotions had no choice but to follow their blueprint. Despite the horror of who or 'what' he was...I was actually experiencing a great level of affection for Caleb. An affection that wasn't there before. An affection as false and imaginary as the dream lover himself.
Why couldn't I shake it? Why?
I got up, and peeled the band of my boxers away from my stomach. I had exploded with so much juice that my eyes were looking at a virtual MESS in there. Covering me from my pubes to my balls, and growing cold as the newest addition of sticky fluids clung to my genitals. I turned my alarm off, as I was up an hour earlier than usual, and I grabbed a fresh pair of underwear out of my drawer to go and take a shower. God, I came a lot! My body was certainly ready to give into the reality of the dream, wasn't it? Maybe I was just...'horny'. Who knows?
I ran the hot water for a few seconds, and lightly pulled the boxers off of me. Then I stepped into the shower and closed the curtain behind me. I don't know what it was...but the second the warm water began to cascade down onto my shoulders, I had to open my eyes again. Maybe it was paranoia, but I could have sworn that I...'felt' something. I opened the curtain and looked out at the rest of the bathroom. Nobody was there. I was all alone. But I still felt as though I was being watched somehow. I tried to ignore the sensation, and started washing myself with my washcloth to get the stickiness off of me. But the feeling didn't go away, not for a moment. And more memories of the dream began to take over my sense of reality.
Was I dreaming now? Or...am I awake? Or was I EVER awake to begin with? Or was I ever ASLEEP to begin with? It was a question that haunted me as much as Caleb's smile...once he finally took control.
It made me think. It made me wonder. I never once had to question my own existence but...what he said to me in the dream really spooked me.
'How do you know that YOU'RE not the dream, and I'M the dreamer?'
I don't know why that was such a creepy statement to me, but it stuck with me. He DID say that he dreamed about me. And he does seem to be getting total control now. Much like how I was beginning to gain control when I started dreamweaving in the first place. I have an entire LIFE that I can remember with ease, but...how is that any different from the fake memories implanted by Caleb to make me feel something for him that I really didn't? How do I know that any part of my life is real....at all?
The more I thought about it...the more I pictured Caleb's cold tongue inside of my mouth. The more I thought about those dead eyes before he brightened them up to become more appealing to me. The more I thought about the intense sexual experience we shared...where I took him into my warm, wet, lips, and sucked him passionately as he returned the favor. I tilted my head back, and took a mouthful of water from the shower head, trying to rinse the taste of his orgasm out of my mouth. I spat the water out and started to scrub myself even harder with my wash cloth. I wanted all traces of him gone. Nothing could remain. It almost made me sick to think about it with a sane mind. But my subconscious? It yearned for more. Practically calling out to him. Inviting him back for another taste.
I imagined his smooth thighs on either side of my head, sensually straddling me, his soft balls resting on my upper lip as I gripped his bubbled cheeks and moaned with him deeply lodged in my throat...my tongue slithering around his hardened shaft. I could still smell the clean aroma of his heated area as it rolled gently up and down against my face. I could still feel his lips tightly wrapped around my length, pleasuring me with a suction that I could feel in the pit of my stomach as he coiled his skillful tongue around me and bathed me with his heated saliva. I felt myself getting hard in the shower just thinking about it, my heart confused as to why it had fallen so deeply in love with something so unreal. But it was all an illusion. I KNOW it was! And I tried to maintain that as much as I could, scrubbing his emotional rape from the surface of my skin, nearly in tears from the thought of being used this way. So helpless to stop it.
Things are getting worse...and I have no one to turn to for help.
By the time I had left the shower...my skin was sore from the friction. And my heart felt as though it had a hole in the center of it.
I didn't talk much to my parents that morning. They asked why I was up so early, and I told them that I just couldn't sleep. My mom looked at me with such an expression of concern. She didn't say anything right away, because I don't think she really knew what to do with me in this situation. But I attempted to give out some sort of subliminal 'hint' that I was ok. not that it really worked very well. But at least it kept her from interrogating me further before she left for work. I think my parents are reaching a level of worry that's gonna have them forcing me to sit down and have a 'family discussion' soon. I can see it in their faces. And I REALLY don't want that! I don't WANNA be crazy! I swear! I just want Caleb to go back to whatever solitary plane of existence he came from, and just leave me alone. That's all. If I can work that out, and get my dreams back to normal...then everything will be ok. I can go back to being a normal boy again.
But...as hard as I try to avoid the feeling....as much as I want to get my control back...Caleb is always right there. Watching. Waiting. Even now I can feel his presence in the room right next to me. INSIDE me. And he's not gonna leave...until he gets what he wants from me.
I had barely gotten a few bites of food in my mouth when Bax came pulling up into my driveway. Usually he shouts out some weird obscenity to get me to open the door...but not today. I heard Jeff lightly rapping on the door, and opened it to see him looking exhausted. Almost to the point of appearing brittle to the touch. "Um...good morning?" I asked, giving him a sideways look.
"Geez...do I look THAT bad?" He said with a yawn, and stepped inside, April and Bax right behind him. "I swear, I'm gonna force myself to sleep all this weekend. This is killing me."
"What's the matter?"
"I don't know. It's like...I keep...'seeing' things. Weird things. And then I wake up. Over and over again, all night. It's exhausting. I feel like I haven't had a decent night's sleep for a week."
"Maybe you should try thinking about your grandmother topless? That should...." Jeff slugged Baxter before he could even finish his sentence.
It was then that April gave me a serious look, and she stepped closer to look me right in the eye. "So...how about you, Donnie? Have...YOU been sleeping better lately?" The way that she asked me...there was something strange about it. It was almost like having a police officer trying to calmly get you to 'drop the knife'.
I looked over at Jeff, remembering our conversation from last night, knowing that they were all about ready to have a full blown 'intervention' for me about the dreamweaving issue. But when our eyes met, he basically gave me the signal to say he hadn't told anybody that I was slipping back into my...'psychosis'. "Yeah." I answered. "A little bit. I mean...much better than before, so..."
"Good. That's awesome." She said, and then yawned herself. Is EVERYBODY losing sleep these days, or what?
I sat down to finish what little breakfast I had left, and noticed that Bax was being unusually quiet this morning. I mean, his obnoxious little comments had pretty much become a part of my morning routine. "What's your deal, today? It's not like you to be spacing out like this." I asked him, and it snapped him out of his temporary daydream.
"Oh...nothing." He said, looking down at the floor as he sat up on the kitchen counter. Then he said, "I'm gonna ask her today. I promised myself I would, and I'm...I'm gonna do it."
"Do what?"
April answered, "He's gonna ask Jessie Turner to go to the Halloween party with him."
"What? Bax, the party's tomorrow, don't you think it's a little bit late?"
"Tommy DeAno says she still doesn't have a date yet. He doesn't even know if she's going." Baxter said, and I narrowed my eyes as I saw him fidget a bit. "So yeah...I'm totally gonna ask her. Do you think she'll say yes? I hope she says yes."
I watched as he sat there, eyes still focused on the tile floor of the kitchen, nervously banging his heels against the cabinet...and I suddenly found myself staring at a lost little boy who almost appeared a total stranger to the rest of us. "Oh my dear God..." I said in disbelief.
"What?"
"This isn't just some pretty girl with a nice pair of tits for you, is it, Bax?"
"Huh? NO! I mean...what the hell are you...?" I swear, I think it was the first time I had ever seen Baxter Trent blush in my entire life!
"No no no...you went from 'I hope she gives me a hand job on the first date' to 'do you think she'll let me take her to the party'. For YOU, that's a huge leap, dude. That's like clearing Mount Everest with a single jump!"
"Whatever. You know what, I was just asking a simple question, and you try to turn and twist it all around...forget it. I'm just talking. You guys talk all the time. Why can't I talk for once?" He said, hopping back down from the counter, hiding his face by turning his back to us.
"Wow! You really LIKE this girl, don't you? I mean, you have some actual emotion invested in her whether or not she likes you back." I said, but he blew off the idea.
"Can we just go, already? Let's get out of here." Awwww, he's embarrassed! That's adorable! Not to mention that it made Jeff squirm a little bit in his chair as his boyish little crush got a bit of an added bonus from having Bax appear to be so...'human'. Bax opened up the door, and walked out on us, as we traded a wicked little smile with April over this new turn of events. I never thought I'd see the day when Bax actually wore his heart on his sleeve. It's kinda cute.
I grabbed my stuff and headed out to the car with everybody else, but...something was making me dizzy. The feeling hit me so suddenly that I stopped, midstep, and had to put my hand up to cover my eyes...just so I could stop the world from spinning long enough to remain standing. Was it just an attack of drowsiness from many restless nights of sleep? Or was it another call from 'him'?
"Donnie?" April called to me. "You ok?"
"Yeah. Yeah, just...give me a second." I said, and I swayed a bit as my eyes tried desperately to focus. And then...without warning, it's like my mouth was filled with the taste of him. Caleb's juices exploding over my tongue in rapid heated spurts. It was more than just a memory. More than just a sensation. It was like it was actually happening again. Right at that moment. Fresh. I turned my head to spit the flavor out onto the concrete. I kept trying to expel whatever it was, but when I looked down at the ground...it was just saliva. Nothing else. And then the sweetened buttery taste was gone. I stood there for a moment, frozen, confused as to what had just happened. Was he dreaming of me again? Were his fantasies about me making this happen?
"Donnie?" Jeff asked.
"Yeah. I'm coming. Sorry. I just...I thought I forgot something in the house. I'm fine." I said, and got into the back seat. I had to do a quick reality check all around me. I had to look at my friends, look at my surroundings, look up at the sky. Was this a dream? Or was I really awake? Did that just happen? Or am I just remembering something that didn't happen? My mind was going in circles again, and it was slowly but surely driving me insane. Reality is just not what it used to be.
I vaguely remember getting into the car. I vaguely remember Baxter starting the engine. But it was only a split second later that I saw April standing outside of the car and looking back at me with a sense of...bewilderment. "Donnie? Hellooooo?"
I felt a bit disoriented. "Huh? What? What is it?"
"Ummm...we have to go to SCHOOL. Remember school?" She said.
"Fine. So get in. Let's go." I said, rubbing my eyes.
But that's when Jeff gave me an even stranger look, and he opened his door. "Go where? We're here already." And he got out of the car.
I sat up and looked at my surroundings, and sure enough we were in the high school parking lot. How the....how the hell did we get here so fast??? I just sat down in the back seat a SECOND ago! Did I black out? How did I suddenly miss the last 15 to 20 minutes?
I got out of the car, and everybody else seemed normal enough. But I...I had no idea what I had been doing the whole trip from my house to the school. And that was just downright frightening. Especially since I could almost feel Caleb with me, his presence growing stronger with every breath. As if...maybe, my submission to his will had somehow merged us even closer together than ever before. His soul to my soul. His world to the real world. Or was it vice versa?
"I don't know, maybe you're right, April." Bax said. "I should just walk right up and ask her. No bullshit games, no stupid hints. Just lay it all on the line and ask her. I mean...I might not get another chance, right?"
"You'll do FINE, Bax. Just do it. With all of your weird little flaws...of which there are MANY...you're still one of the most lovable boys I know." April replied. "Besides, this is high school, and you're hot. That's all that really matters in this place anyway. Save your emotions and intelligence for college where it actually counts for something."
"I do believe that's the nicest thing you've ever said to me, April."
"Yeah, well, don't get used to it. I was just trying to shut you up long enough for me to get to class with a clear conscience." She stood on her tiptoes and gave Bax a sweet kiss on the cheek, and Jeff lightly closed the door as he got out of the car.
Jeff kinda stared dreamily at Bax for a moment, and then he softly told him, "You know...she'd be stupid to say no. You can be...really cool when you wanna be, Bax. Anybody would be lucky to have you as their date. For anything." And he gave him a bashful smirk as his face turned red. Straight or not, I honestly think Bax was flattered.
He sorta mumbled, "Thanks, Jeff. Honestly." It was said with so much heart. I think he actually allowed himself to be really vulnerable at that point. But he was quick to straighten up when he saw Jeff smile back at him with a blush of his own. "Ahem...for the DOOR, I mean."
"About the...huh?"
"Thanks...for not slamming the car door." I suppose it was Baxter's way of shutting down their shared 'moment' without being a jerk about it. Jeff took the hint and instantly backed away from it as well.
"Yeah, I knew that. The door. Whatever." And they all started walking towards the school. "Donnie, you coming, or what?"
"Coming." I said. I still felt off balance. Almost as though I was floating forward by habit alone. No thought needed to move, or to speak...it all seemed so automatic. As if it was being controlled and manipulated by someone else entirely. It was hard for me to even concentrate for more than a few seconds without my mind wandering, or my senses feeling numb and dull. What the hell was happening to me?
It was a mental struggle that I dealt with for most of the morning. There were some moments where I felt like myself again, and others where I felt completely lost as to where I was, and what I was doing. The most puzzling moment came when I got back to Mr. Lipton's class and saw, yet ANOTHER 'C' grade on my paper! This time, I couldn't take it anymore, and I demanded an answer. I went up to his desk, and he practically rolled his fucking eyes at me. I mean, as a professional high school TEACHER, can he even DO that to his students???
"I don't get it. I don't understand what you want from me, Mr. Lipton." I tried not to sound too upset, but I had to ball up my fists and grit my teeth just to hold the anger back. "Why did you give me another 'C'??? I'm working SO hard in this class, trying to write the best I CAN, and you're KILLING me here!"
He looked up at me as though he were simply 'bothered' by me. "Mr. James...this story you wrote is not finished. It just stops at one point, and anybody reading it is stuck without knowing what happens next. That's both frustrating and unprofessional. You've officially wasted my time by not providing proper closure to this idea. I can't give you a higher grade for that. Come back when you've had time to actually complete something for a change."
"Mr. Lipton, I worked my ASS off on this story! I pushed really HARD just to get it this far, and I've got a LOT of other stuff going on from all of my other classes. I could have done a half-ass job on it and just wrapped it all up, but every time I hurry and stress myself out to get something done, you say it looks 'rushed' and 'weak' and that it's full of mistakes. All you do is complain, either way."
"I'm not complaining, I'm attempting to teach you how to do your assignments correctly and completely. If I say it looks rushed...then DON'T rush. If I say you made mistakes...then edit your own work and correct the mistakes. This shouldn't be hard for you, Donnie. Your other classmates seem to be grasping the concept just fine." He said. "If you feel 'pressured' to produce quality work on the deadline I set for you....tough. Try harder."
"Can't you just grade me on the quality and effort of my writing? I'm...I'm pushing sooo hard! At LEAST give me some credit for putting forth a champion effort every time I hand in an assignment?"
Mr. Lipton looked closer at my eyes, and slightly leaned forward in his chair. "I suppose I could, Donnie. But as far as I'm concerned, that kind of special treatment is only reserved for students that I truly feel give a damn about this course, and who have potential to go further. You...are NOT that student. So why don't you take your seat, and try to concentrate more on getting a passing grade in this class based on your OWN merit, instead of trying to convince me why I should give it to you for free? Hmmm?" I looked at him in utter disbelief. This man was evil incarnate! I was completely humiliated!!! And just as I snatched my paper back and walked back to my desk, I heard him say, "There are no free rides in this class, Mr. James. Not for you, not for them, not for anybody. No free rides."
Arrrgh! Fuck him! There's no reason for him to be such an asshole to the rest of us! What the hell is his problem, anyway? I sat down...opened up my books, and slumped down in my chair. Sulking as I thought about the audacity that man had to have to actually say that to me in a room full of people. I can't afford to fail English! I can't even afford to get a bad grade in this class! Ugh! I HATE this! I really do. He's gonna screw up everything!
I turned to one of the middle pages in my notebook...and stopped. I wrinkled my forehead a bit, running my fingers over the surface of it. For some strange reason I saw the page COMPLETELY covered in black ink. Giant angry scribbles all over, from top to bottom, margin to margin. Dark ones, where my pen had created deep frustrated grooves into the paper. It had even torn through the paper in certain places. I turned to the next page, and the next one, and the next one...and they were all full of the same rage filled mess as the first one. I don't...I don't remember....doing this...
"GET OUT!!!" Mr. Lipton yelled. I looked up from my notebook to see him glaring at me with so much hatred that it nearly burned a hole right through the center of my face.
"Wha...???"
"Get out of my classroom! NOW!" He said, and I looked around at the rest of the class. They all had their eyes on me. Staring. Some in total shock, others giggling with amusement. "Don't make me ask you again, Mr. James!"
"What did I do?" All I remember doing was sitting back down at my desk.
"Don't play games with me, I'm not in the mood!"
"But..."
"Take it up with your guidance counselor!" He said. "GO!!!"
He had a pass already written out for me. What the fuck was he doing NOW??? He can't just kick me out of the classroom for no reason! Fine, he wants to play that game, we'll play it his way. I'm telling my counselor just how much I can't STAND him, and how I want to be transferred to another class. I've had enough of his bullshit anyway! I want out!
I took the pass and stormed out of the classroom, not even bothering to look back. I was already drowsy and upset, and he picks today of all days to pull this crap.
My counselor, Mr. Prince, didn't seem to take kindly to the note Mr. Lipton sent with me. In fact, I saw his eyes bulge slightly as he read it. Then he sat back and sighed as he began to speak. An entire five minute lecture on how my scores were declining, and how it was pulling down my grade point average. He asked me about the dark circles under my eyes and if I had been sleeping. Arrrgh!!! I'm sooooo SICK of being questioned about my sleeping habits! I wanna SCREAM!!! I tried to explain that it was Mr. Lipton's fault that my grades were so low, and told him that I didn't do ANYTHING wrong to get kicked out of his class today. I told him exactly what happened, action for action, word for word.
That's when he picked up the note again, and he said, "So...you didn't threaten Mr. Lipton in any way? Is that what you're telling me?"
My jaw dropped. "WHAT??? Threaten him? HOW? By snatching my 'C' grade paper back from him after he INSULTED me? No!"
He looked at the note again. "So...you didn't say, 'I warned you before. Now you've got to PAY, you pathetic piece of shit?' These aren't your words?"
"Wait...WHAT???"
"You didn't say, 'You failed at your life and now you want to take it out on everybody else? I TOLD you to leave him alone. NOW I'm gonna make your hurt like HE hurts. NOW I'm gonna make you BURN, you self centered asshole.'" He said, looking over the note. "You mind telling me what brought this on, Donnie? And who 'he' is?"
My mouth dropped open even further...outraged at the idea. "That's a LIE, Mr. Prince!!! Omigod...that's a bold faced LIE!!! I never said ANY of those things! I'm not CRAZY!"
"I never said you were CRAZY, Donnie...but...am I to believe that one of our teachers made all of this up just to get you out of his class?"
"It *IS* made up! I swear to you!" I begged. He looked at me for a second, and then he put the note back down on the desk and reached in his drawer. He pulled out a pad full of passes, and he wrote on one for me.
"This is a VERY serious situation, Donnie. You could be suspended for this. Possibly even expelled. We have a ZERO tolerance policy for threats of violence against anyone in this school, you know this."
"But...I didn't threaten anybody..." I said, trembling, wondering if he was suspending me right there on the spot. Then, he tore the pass off of the pad and handed it to me. Thank GOD...it wasn't a suspension.
"I want you to come see me in my office on Tuesday, Donnie. Ok? Come during your study hall period. I want to have a serious sit-down talk with you. And I'll look more into this problem of yours with Mr. Lipton. DON'T let it slip your mind. I'll be here waiting. I trust you'll be on time."
"Yes, Mr. Prince." I said, and sulked my way out of his office. But not before he told me...
"Get some sleep. Hear me?"
It was getting close to the end of the day when I met up with April and Jeff in the hallway. They greeted me with the biggest smile ever, and when I asked what was up...Jeff gave me a shove and burst out giggling. "Dude, way to GO! I'm so damn proud of you right now!"
"Proud of me for what?"
April grinned, "Oh c'mon, Donnie! EVERYBODY'S talking about it! You've gotta tell us what finally caused you to snap like that!"
Confused, I stared into their excited faces. "Snap like....like what?" I think, deep down, I already knew the answer. But I was kinda hoping it wasn't true.
"Lipton, dude! You finally told that blowhard son of a bitch to fuck off! God, you're like a high school folk hero right now! That had to be AWESOME! I wish I had been there to see it!" Jeff said, bouncing on his heels.
I looked at both of them, and they seemed to be dead serious about what they were telling me. And that only frightened me more. "Where did you hear about this?" I asked.
Jeff said, "Heh...like, EVERYWHERE! The second everybody got out of that classroom they started spreading the word. I think you officially SHOCKED most of the people in this building today. Both of us included."
Just then, as my senses were trying to gain any recollection whatsoever of the incident, Baxter practically came SKIPPING down the hall in our direction. And with the most animated smile ever created, he shouted, "SHE SAID YES!!!" He lifted April off of her feet and spun her around before putting her back down again. "Omigod! You were right! I just walked up, and I talked to her for a few seconds, and then I asked her out! She was smiling the whole time! Said she'd LOVE to go!" Jeff and I almost didn't recognize Bax while he was being so...'cheerful'. The way he looked as the two of us we were worried that he was gonna pick US up next! "I can't believe it, you guys. Jessie Tuner. THE Jessie Turner! I never in a million year thought she'd say yes. I've been trying to talk to that girl since I was 11 years old...and now...I'm taking her out on a date." He sighed to himself. Wow...he really IS attached to this girl.
"Baxter? You're reaaaally starting to scare me now!" April said, and pushed Bax away as he charged in to give her a hard kiss on the cheek.
"I'm totally gonna make this work! Seriously! I'm gonna totally ask her to be my girlfriend! Oh man...this is awesome! All I ever needed was ONE chance to show her I was a good guy! Just ONE! And this is it!"
"But...you're NOT a good guy, Bax." Jeff teased, trying to work up a smirk, even though I think his crush was seriously being deflated right now. "In fact...you're kind of a jerk. It was, like...part of your charm."
"Those days are over, baby. If it means having Jessie Turner sit on my lap in public...I'd give up almost everything." He grinned, and glided down the hall like Fred Astaire on an acid trip as we all watched in amazement.
We all had....no comment.
When it came time to go home after school, I made sure to take in every last detail that I possibly could. The wind, the colors, the trees, my friends...everything. I actually found myself holding onto April's hand in the back seat of Baxter's car, just to make sure that I had some sort of solid anchor placed firmly in reality. She did think it was awfully weird of me to be doing that, but Bax was going on and on so much about Jessie Turner and how gorgeous she was, that she didn't have much of a chance to put too much thought into my irrational behavior. I was scared that I might black out again. That I might say or do something strange and not even remember. I had to wander around school for the rest of the day, dodging compliments from other kids and people cheering me on for letting one of the meanest English teachers in the whole school have both barrels for the way he treated me. But...despite all the fuss and the praise from the other students...I knew that it wasn't me. I mean, I was ANGRY, sure...but those words would have never left my mouth. Not ever. 'You're gonna burn'??? It would never even cross my MIND to say that. It just doesn't make any sense.
Bax dropped me off at home, and I was lucky to get away from his lovey dovey rambling first. Even Jeff silently mouthed the words 'help me' out of the passenger side window as they drove off. I know that I remembered every minute of the drive home this time...but the mental possession of my thoughts and actions weren't quite over yet.
The drowsiness hit me HARD while sitting at the dinner table with my parents. It was spaghetti night, but as I was using one hand to twirl the noodles around my fork...the other hand was the only thing helping to hold my head up at the table. I was literally feeling 'faint', fighting to remain conscious long enough to at least EAT something. My parents were taking little peeks at me again. Looking at me as if I was some kind of mental patient eating off of their good china. Their voices sounded so faint. So very...'distant'. And as I was attempting to lift another labored fork fool of spaghetti noodles to my mouth, I could have sworn I heard Caleb's voice...whispering my name.
My eyelids were becoming so heavy. So heavy. My breathing slowed until I was almost snoring at the table. It was almost as if I could feel my heart slowing down. And while I distinctly heard my mother call my name...I didn't have the strength to answer.
It had been soooooo long since I was just able to....lay down and just...
...lay down and....
...and just...
There was no transition. No subtle fade to black. No return to color. Just a moment of 'awakening' as I found myself standing in the driveway of my house...and the gentle wind started rolling by as the dream took a firm hold of me. I blinked a few times, attempting to figure out where I was, and when I looked up again, Caleb was waiting for me by the same old tree in the front yard. A gentle smirk on his face. His blond hair blowing gently with the breeze. Beautiful as ever. Seductively slim, with eyes that lured you closer with their spectacular gaze. One sight, and already I yearned to hold him in my arms again.
"Welcome home, sweetie." He smiled, and he walked closer to greet me. At first I gasped, some small traces of my former self still reacting to this ghostly image of the boy before me. But it didn't take long for his reality and mine to merge once again, and we both became lost in one another all over again. His hand brushed against my cheek, and a shiver went down my spine. "I don't like it when you're away for so long. Why do you keep fighting the sleep so much. It's better in here, don't you think? Just you and me?" I didn't answer him as he stared deeply into my eyes. "You're so uptight. But that's ok, Donnie. You know why? Because I love you for who you are. No matter what. I know this is scary right now, it's scary for both of us. But...in time, it'll be ok. You'll learn to love this place more and more like I have. And soon, there won't be any reason for you to wake up at all anymore." He draped his arms over my shoulders, and he smiled as he leaned in to kiss my lips. "I don't think I've ever been more in love with another boy before. Did you know that? You're, like....my first real boyfriend. You're perfect." Then he asked, "What about me? Don't you think I'm perfect for you too? I mean, we're like the perfect match. It's fate. That's why you were able to see me before. That's why I was brought here. So that we could be together."
"Mmmmmph....mmmmmph...." I tried to speak, but my lips wouldn't open. I attempted to move my limbs, but they would not obey. And yet, there was no 'stiffness' to speak of. It wasn't like being tied up or restrained. My limbs were as soft and flexible as they always were. But unless Caleb allowed me to move...movement wasn't an option.
"Shhhh...baby, you're gonna hurt yourself. Why don't we just enjoy our time together. We're going to have a lot more of it soon." He smiled, and as he kissed the side of my neck, I closed my eyes and just tried to block him out. The dreamscape itself began to twitch and spasm from my efforts...but Caleb forced them to stay steady with the blink of an eye. "Mmmm....you look soooooo delicious..."
Caleb kissed me deeply on the lips once again, and then lowered himself to his knees, to open the front of my pants, and slide me lovingly into his mouth. The sensation was overwhelming. Dream sex is better than any other sex that you will ever have. Something about it taps into your personal needs and desires like no separate mind ever could. The purest form of mental masturbation.
But as I tried to fight my way out of my subconscious prison, I felt Caleb's mouth grow cold around me. His tongue, like ice against my shaft. His hands, like ice around my balls. And then...as I heard him start to playfully giggle to himself, his face losing color right in front of my eyes, turning him a shade of white only reserved for the dead...an odor filled my nostrils. I was finally permitted to speak, and whispered..."I smell smoke..."
And Caleb looked up at me, letting my hardness slip from between his cold lips, and he said, "Hehehe, so do I." And his eyes began to glow and flicker like two lit matches. Then wisps of black smoke rose from the corners of his mouth, until he began to laugh out loud...and the smoke began to billow out of his throat as flames burned behind his tonsils. "Hahahahaha!!!!!!"
My eyes shot open! And I found myself lying in my own bed. I quickly sat up and looked around the room...frightened by the silence surrounding me. The sun was shining in through my bedroom window, and as I looked over at the time on my clock, I saw that I was up earlier than my own alarm again. I attempted to calm my breathing down a bit, and eventually got up to use the bathroom. I splashed some water on my face, looking at myself closely in the mirror. I was so exhausted that I could barely recognize my own reflection. I was losing it. I couldn't believe that this was actually happening to me. This is what it feels like...to start going mad.
When I walked back out into the hallway, my mom walked by and rubbed her fingers through my hair, giving me a kiss to say good morning. "You feeling better, honey?"
I paused for a moment, secretly checking the walls and the carpet to make sure I wasn't dreaming. "Feeling...better?"
"From last night? Remember?" She said. "You looked SO sleepy at the dinner table, your father and I were worried. You said you wanted to go to sleep early and just stay in bed all night. You practically passed out the second your head hit the pillow. Don't you remember?"
No.....all I remembered was...dinner. And feeling sleepy. And then...Caleb. "Oh, right. Yeah. I guess...the sleep must have done me some good." I lied, wondering how much longer I planned to hide this. How can I ask for help in a way that won't get me locked away in an asylum for the rest of my life?
"Good to hear, honey. You keep sleeping like you did last night, and you'll be back to your old self in no time. I think you were out for 11 hours or more." She said, walking past me to go downstairs. Then she stopped and said, "Are you still going to that Halloween party tonight with your friends?" I gently nodded, a blank stare on my face. "Well, you guys be careful. And come home before curfew. I don't want you out too late. There's a lot of psychos out there on Halloween."
Right. And I think I'm becoming one of them.
My nerves were on edge the entire time I was getting dressed. When my parents left for work....that giant house had never been so quiet. So empty. Every creak in the floor seemed to echo for a full minute and a half off of the old walls, and downstairs into the living room and kitchen. Suddenly...I didn't feel so safe...being alone. Not that being in a crowd of people made me any more 'protected'. I was standing in the middle of the hallway upstairs, when I heard a door at the other end slowly creak open. I peeked at it for a moment, holding my breath. And then...
"OPEN UP, ASS MASTER!!!" Thank God! Bax's voice never sounded so good!
I hurried downstairs to let them in, and began to breathe a sigh of relief. I was overjoyed to have them in the house with me, if for no other reason than to distract me from the deafening silence of the place.
Baxter seemed to be back to his old self again. In fact, he seemed to be even MORE cocky than he was before. But why not? He's dating the prettiest girl in school tonight.
It was during a conversation about our plans for Cory's party tonight that Bax said something out of the ordinary. "Well, you'll definitely be in good spirits tonight, and probably for the next few weeks...you know, with the good news and all."
"Hehehe, you mean to tell me I have GOOD news waiting for me for a change." I said.
"What? You didn't hear?" Jeff asked, and Bax had a big smile spread across his face.
"Old man Lipton is outta commission, bro. I think you, like...cursed him or something! Creepy! Hehehe! But whatever you did, it saved the rest of us from having to deal with the smug fucker till after the holidays. If we're lucky, we might be able to pull some decent grades out of the substitutes and rescue our GPA from the tyranny of 'Mr. I Hate Everything You Write'."
I was still a bit confused, and asked, "Wait...I'm still not reading you. What happened?"
"Are you kidding me? You didn't hear about it on the news this morning?" Bax told me. "He's like, in the hospital. The old coot went home yesterday, fell asleep at like 6:30 or something crazy like that...and the stupid bastard burned his own house down!"
"He WHAT???"
"Yeah! Weird right? At first, the news lady said that he fell asleep or something and it might have been an accident. But NOW they're thinking that it might have been a suicide attempt. That's just a rumor though. But it looks kinda shady. It's like...he set the fire on purpose or something." Then Baxter giggled and looked me in the eye. "Just think, Donnie. You could have been the one kid who broke the old camel's back! Ooooooohhhhh....you're gonna 'burn'! Twisted, ain't it? Hehehe!"
Very twisted. Twisted indeed.