Date: Sat, 20 Dec 2008 08:31:16 -0800 (PST) From: jude6907@yahoo.com Subject: [Fate]: Chapter 2: Confession This story contains homosexual material that may be explicit to minors. If you are NOT 18 years old or above the age of 18, Do NOT continue reading. This is my first Nifty story. It is enitirely fictional and from my own imagination. Please be tactful about any responses you may or may not want to express to me. Although I am open to "constructive" criticism, I'd rather not hear a bunch of negativity. If, in fact, you would like to contact me, you may do so by adding me on Yahoo!Messenger: jude6907@yahoo.com Please give a brief introduction of yourself so you don't freak me out! Thanks for reading! - Jude Covenan CHAPTER 2 - Confession * * * "Keiran. . . Keiran!! Slow down, hun, slow down." Audrianna tried to calm me. I told her about the strange `man' [or whoever the fuck] who called me. "Do you think it could be James?" she asked me. As I held the phone to my ear, I turned on my signal so I could turn left onto Rosemary Avenue. "I don't know, Audrie. I just don't know." I admitted. "I kinda wish it will be him, but then again. . ." ". . . You don't wanna set yourself up for a disappointment." She sometimes knew exactly what was going through my mind just as I was thinking it. How do girls do that? That's always fascinated me! I turned on my blinker again as I entered the lavish Heartland Park and drove to the designated parking area. Tall trees had grown sporadically throughout the entire park, and a random trail wove its way in and out of it. "If it is him, then I guess I'll talk to him." I finally said. "Keiran, be careful." Audrianna told me, her friendship set of mind morphing into her womanly intuition. "I will, I promise." I reassured her as I shifted the gears to Park and waited in my car. "If I don't call you or text you by 10pm then you know where I'm at. . ." "Don't talk like that! You'll be fine, dip-shit. Just be careful." I could hear aggravation in her tone. "I will. I'll call you as soon as I know I'm safe, okay?" "Okay. Bye, love." "Bye." So there I was, sitting in my car with my nerves on edge, waiting for a mysterious "someone" to meet me. I really hoped whoever it was wasn't some kind of freak, and that it really was James who was on the phone earlier. It was only 8:22pm. I know it's kind of early to be here, but I really didn't want to sit at home with ants in my pants. I killed the ignition but left the keys in there - just in case - and allowed my mind to drift away to the few memories that took place within the last 2 years. . . I will never forget the day I met James. It was May 27th, to be exact, over 2 years ago. Since it was the last day of school for our Senior year, Audrianna and I had made plans to chill at the Starbucks in Trenton until later that night, when we'd be socializing at some end-of-the-year party. We were sitting at a table near the entrance and James was working the cash register as well as making the drinks the few customers had ordered. When we had first arrived, I had to restrain myself from eye-raping him every chance I got. I thought he was the sexiest guy ever! No, like, seriously! He had the body, the confidence [without the arrogance], the charm, and that killer smile he flashed at every customer. God! I would love to date HIM! I thought. I had brought my guitar inside, and that gave Audrie and I something to do besides gawking at cute boys. Haha! I was playing a song that I'd been working on, and Audrie was helping me with the melody. "You know he's been looking at you every chance he gets. . ." Audrie stated as she continued doodling on a napkin. "Are you serious!? Really?!" I replied. "How do you know?" She smiled and said, "I'm a girl, silly! I know how to stare while being inconspicuous." A slow, mischievous smile began creeping from ear to ear. Uh oh. "I'll prove it!" she suggested. She saw the confused expression on my face and started explaining. "All you need to do is get up and pretend like you're going to the bathroom, then once you're almost there, glance back! Plain and simple! And I guarantee you his eyes will be glued to that bubble butt of yours." I giggled at the mention of my butt. It really was nice a plump. . . Proportioned perfectly with the rest of my body. I think I just sounded a bit conceited. . . Oh well! ^_^ Bite me. ^_^ I thought about it for a moment, then decided to take action. I placed my guitar to where it leaned against the table without falling to the floor, fixed my clothing, and began walking towards the Men's restroom. Sure enough, when I was just about to step inside, I glanced back and James was staring at me! Our eyes met, but he doused the sparks and flames that had begun to shower around us and smiled shyly before continuing his duties. Audrianna was simply leaning back in her chair, her arms crossed, and sporting a victorious grin on her face. I could hear her mouthing "Told you so!" as I turned around. I realized I really did have to potty, so walked in and did my business, washed my hands, and when I turned the faucet off, the door opened and in stepped Mr. Hott Pants! He was even more sexy up close and personal! Something about the way he just stood in front of the door, casually fixing his work attire, told me that he didn't come in there to use the potty. So I just pretended like I didn't see him and continued nonchalantly air-drying my hands with those Save-The-Trees! air blower thingies. As I was rubbing my hands together, removing the excess water, I turned my head to get a better look at him and he smiled at me! He fucking smiled at me!!! "What's your name?" he curiously asked, his voice a bit shy. "Uh, um, well. . . Keiran." I stammered. No guy has ever made me stammer! What the hell is wrong with me?! Keiran, get your shit together man! "Well, nice to meet you, uh, um, well. . . Keiran." he smiled again. "My name is James. James Heath." James Heath. . . Jaaaames Heattthhh. My hands were done drying so all I could do was stand there staring at this hunk of a man blocking the door, and try to will my bulge to disappear. "Soooo. . ." I said, feeling a little awkward standing in an empty bathroom with a hott guy who I was ready to. . . Down boy. "So, you should let me take you on a date sometime." James put his hands in his pocket and hung his head slightly, all the while smiling at me with those beautiful brown eyes. God! He looked so cute!!! I bit my lip and glanced away quickly. I barely knew the guy, and yet, I had some feeling that we'd be perfect for each other. It never hurts to try, right? "Um, okay." I said, noticing my stomach taking flight. Then James did the unthinkable. He walked right over to me, looked me deep into my eyes and kissed me softly on my lips. I thought I was going to faint, to be truthful! "Thank you, uh, um, well. . . Keiran." he bit his lip and touched mine own lips with his forefinger. Fuck! What do I say to that?!?! "Um, your welcome?" I tried to regain my composure. No luck with the bulge. James laughed softly. "How about I meet you at Applebees tomorrow? Around 7-ish?" he raised his left eyebrow. "Y-yeah. That sounds good! Great!" I'm really trying, guys!! Help me! I look like a total oOber head! "Then tomorrow it is." he confirmed, grabbing the handle to the door. "See ya then, handsome." And that was the beginning of our relationship. It all started with a kiss in the bathroom of Starbucks. Haha. My daydream was cut short when I heard a car drive past. I checked my phone again to see what time it was: 8:38pm. Any minute, now. . . James and I had been dating for six months, and it was all too perfect until my parents found out about us. Needless to say, they didn't know I was gay. I had never talked to them about my sexuality before, and when the subject came up about girlfriends and the such, [mainly from my dad], I would always avoid it by say something simple like, "I just don't need a girlfriend right now, Dad. I have enough to worry about: school, the future, my own plans for my life. . .". That kept him and my mom at bay until the end of November. . . It was right after dinner and I was walking James to his car. I didn't think my parents would be "stalking" me: we had led them to believe that we were just friends. But I guess they kind of saw through that veil. So, James and I got in his truck and started talking. We had no idea The Parentals were eyeing our every move. We were planning to meet up the next day for dinner and a movie, and once we had decided, he pulled my face to his and kissed me. Now, this was not just a simple I'll-see-you-tomorrow kiss. NO! This was a I'm-so-horny-I-could-fuck-your-brains-out-right-here kind of kiss. . . AND MY PARENTS SAW THE WHOLE DAMNED THING!!! Talk about walking through hell and back when I got inside! Mom was yelling and crying and screaming profanities, and Dad was standing beside her, all the while having a blank, disgusted expression on his face, and I was shrinking by the minute at Mom's remarks. At one point I even started crying, she was battering me so hard! But, I mean, this was my mother! The person who brought me into this world!! [with the help of Dad, of course]. I tried to explain to them but they weren't having it. They wouldn't hear what I had to say. . . "How could you not tell us about this, Keiran?!?!" Mom was yelling. LOUD! "How the FUCK can you be a faggot?! Huh?. . . HUH?!?! WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU!!!! SO YOU JUST FUCK BOYS, IS THAT IT?!!?. . . ANSWER ME, DAMNIT, OR SO HELP ME GOD!!!. . ." Because I was afraid of shit like this! I thought. I started to mumble a response, but I couldn't quite get it out. She was really making me feel worse than dirt. . . Shitty dirt. I hate being yelled at. "What's that?" She started advancing on me. I guess Dad sensed she was about to snap, but he couldn't stop her in time. I tried backing away to avoid whatever she had planned on doing to me, but the couch was in my way. I COULDN'T MOVE! "WHAT'S THAT, FAGGOT BOY?!" she yelled as she stepped towards me, pushing me backwards, over the couch. "MOM!" I half yelled, half whined as I flipped backwards and landed on the wooden coffee table, breaking it, mind you. Ouch. That's gonna hurt in the morning. "Don't call me `MOM', you fucking faggot. Queers don't deserve moms, and I will NOT raise a queer for a son." she started coming around the couch for me now. What the fuck?! This woman's trying to really hurt me!! HER OWN SON!!! Her ONLY son! I tried to stand up quickly to defend my case, but my left leg was killing me. "You and Dad would've never listened anyway." I tried to say calmly as she was now standing just an arms width in front of me. I kept my distance. It was enough being yelled at, but I didn't want to be a victim of anything else. . . I could feel my ankle swelling. "OF COURSE WE'RE NOT GONNA LISTEN!! THERE'S NOTHING TO SAY!! YOU'RE A FUCKING QUEER, Keiran!!" Not even Dad would try and defend me. He just stood there behind Mom with one hand on her shoulder. I never knew they felt this way about homosexuality! We've seen some gay guys plenty of times at restaurants and stuff, and it wouldn't even bother them! Of course, I knew it disturbed them, but they never acted out, verbally or physically, upon their opinions! "DON'T FUCKING TOUCH ME, RON!" she snapped at my dad. Then she said the words that still hurt me to this day. She looked at me - through me - and all I could see was the hatred, disgust, and disappointment lingering in her eyes and dripping with every consonant that was about to escape her twisted mouth. "Get out of my house, faggot boy. . . You are no longer my son after tonight, and you are never, and I mean NEVER invited back. . . Ever." The words hit me like a thousand tons of cement. My heart fell to my knees and my chest was caving inward. I couldn't breathe, I couldn't speak, I couldn't see straight, and my left ankle hurt like hell. . . All I could do was half stand, half lean on one leg and let the tears flow as my body began to shake with anger, pain, and emotional hurt. I searched my parents eyes for some sort of understanding and forgiveness for being `queer'. Nothing was there. ". . .What are you waiting for, queer?" Dad threw THAT stone at me. "Get." I limped past them, upstairs to my room, grabbed an old backpack and shoved whatever my hands could find into it. It wasn't ten minutes and I was in my car, on my way to Audrianna's house. I cried all the way there - and nearly wrecking my Civic because I ran a stop sign - and loads more after we were in her room. [her parents didn't mind me sleeping with her. They knew I was gay. . . Obviously, I had no thoughts and plans of having straight-sex with her]. I promised Audrie that she could take me to the hospital in the morning, but right then, I just wanted to sleep. . . Maybe even die. But I didn't tell her that. That night Audrianna held me in her arms and comforted me while I cried myself to a dreamless sleep. 8:55pm. Where is this guy? I thought as I checked my phone again, laying my painful memories to rest. * * * A tall man dressed entirely in black entered the park from the rear entrance. His hood was pulled over his head despite the 80-degree humidity. He didn't seem like he was in a hurry, but he walked as if he had all the time on God's green Earth. He journeyed the winded trail that would eventually lead him to the North entrance of Heartland Park, where he knew his prey would be waiting in his car, daydreaming and looking for him every few minutes. * * * As I cautiously searched the surrounding area I saw someone coming towards me. My chest tightened. Okay, maybe I should've just ignored this invitation. . . The hooded figure started walking faster. I kept trying to see his face, but the damned hood on his coat kept his face hidden. Why the fuck was he wearing a coat in mid-July anyway? Fucking moron, I tell you. . . My heart race elevated. I locked the doors to my car just as the man stepped into the light of the streetlamp, just a few feet in front of me. My hands were on the keys, which were still in the ignition, and I was ready to haul ass if shit hit the fan. Why the fuck won't you look at me?! I thought. Well, maybe you are looking at me, but I can't tell!. . . Dude, you're really freaking my shit OUT! My thoughts were rambling as two hands emerged from the pockets and headed for the hood. Oh shit. I'm about to die. Fuck. In one swift movement, the hood was off and my fears were made reality. I swear my heart stopped beating for a second or two. "James." I whispered. The hooded figure nodded. I didn't know what to do! I was angry, mad, ecstatic, happy, horny, and a few other emotions all wrapped in one big emotional meltdown, but I was trapped in my car. Its doors were locked and its arms clung to me, pinning me to the seat. James slowly walked closer, I guess afraid I would scream or drive off. When I didn't, he walked faster. As he reached for the door handle, I was finally able to make out most of his complexion. My stomach fell off the rollercoaster and my member joined the mile-high club. He hadn't cut his hair [for whatever the reason], and it now rested between his ears and his jaw line. I never knew his hair was slightly wavy, though. . . And his eyes were. . . Green? Even in the moonlight, I could see them, emerald-jade as can be. He did look a bit pale though. Was he sick? Maybe it was just the moonlight. . . The door opened and he smiled. Shit! That fucking smile still makes me weak. . . It wasn't even one second before I was unbuckled and in his arms, crying my heart out and yelling at him through sobs which he probably didn't understand. Whatever I said earlier about me hating him, I take it back. Hell, I knew I was still in love with the guy, even if he DID leave me for more than a year without a single word of knowledge as to where he went and why. . . Fucking homo. . . Fucking heartless, sexy, stupid homo. James just stood there, holding me in his arms and I cried into his chest until I could control my tears. I pulled away to get a better look at him. His eyes WERE green! Are those contacts? "Where were you, James?" I asked, trying desperately to keep the lump in my throat from rising as I spoke. God knows I had missed him so much!!! He sighed. "I was. . . I couldn't. . . I'm sorry, Kai! I really am! But you never would have understood!" "Understood what?" I asked, creasing my eyebrows and then wiping my eyes as I released myself from his arms and leaned against my car. He looked as if he almost didn't want to tell me. I haaate secrets. . . "James. . ." I said, reaching out to grab his arms. ". . . Tell me what? I'm sure ill understand, but you'll never know unless you tell me." He took a few steps back. My heart sank. Is he leaving again? Please, God, not again! I couldn't take it. I would die right here, right now. "Keiran." he whispered. I looked him deep into his green eyes. "Baby, I love you! Whatever you tell me, I'm sure we can work it out. Just tell me, okay?" I kissed his neck softly and laid my head back on his chest. It might've just been me, but he seemed kind of cold. "Kai. . . ?" "Yes, babe?" "Promise me you'll always love me." "Only if you promise me you'll never leave me. . ." I quickly said, raising my head to stare into his gorgeous eyes - real or fake. "I promise." he said. "You know I will ALWAYS love you." I reassured him. "I promise." It seemed as if James was stalling for some reason. Like he was afraid that I would leave HIM. We stood there for nearly ten minutes before James finally broke the silence. "Keiran, I've changed - a lot, mind you -" "What do you m-" "Just hear me out, baby." he said, placing a finger on my lips. Fuck! His hands were really cold! I hope he's okay. . . "I wanted to tell you that night. . . Remember the night I. . . left?" Do I REMEMBER? Of course, I remember! You fucked me senseless then left me the next morning! I thought. "Yeah." I shuddered. "I remember." "After we showered, I was gonna tell you, but you looked so peaceful and content just laying on my chest. . . I didn't want to ruin that. I knew if I told you, I'd probably lose you forever. . . I was second guessing myself, and . . ." He stopped and looked me in my eyes with a passion that I have never felt or experienced before. Then he kissed me. God, I can't take anymore of this! "Baby?" I said, breathless and slightly lightheaded. "I'm getting there, Keiran. Just give me a minute." I stopped asking questions and let him talk while the fog cleared from my brain. "That night before I left, I was sleeping in my room. My brother - do you remember him?" "Conner?" I asked, trying to recall his brother's name. "Close enough. Colter. Well, I was having this weird dream. I saw myself sleeping in my bed, like I was in real life. Then, in my dream, I see my brother walk through my door - yes, THROUGH my door -" He saw the look of confusion written on my face. " . . . And he climbed on top of me and gave me this horrible look. . . Colter looked at me as if. . . As if he wanted to . . . Eat me. That's the best way I can put it. The next thing I know, I'm awake in real life, with Colter biting the shit out of my neck and my blood spilling everywhere. I pushed him off of me and he just stood in the corner of the room, watching me. The last thing I remember before going unconscious was my feet touching the floor and then. . . Nothing." I didn't know what to think. I hope he's not on crack or anything. Maybe that would explain the coat he's wearing. . . James just held me and stopped talking, obviously waiting for my response. "I don't know what to make of this, James. It doesn't make sense. It was just a dream. Why would you leave though?" I asked. He let go of me, then pulled the collar of the coat down about three inches. I had to lean in a little closer to see what was there. It was a tattoo that read "James", but it was covering something else. That "something else" was an arch and it started between the "J" and the "a", and ended between the "e" and the "s". "What the hell is that?" I asked, curiosity overwhelming me. Did he get a new boyfriend while he was gone? Jealousy was creeping its way into my blood stream and I could feel its effect in my chest. "I told you, I woke up and my brother was nibbling on my neck, to say the least. I didn't know he liked our kind. . ." I could hear the smirk in his voice. "You're brother's gay too?" I stepped back and asked, totally thrown off guard. "Baby, my brother likes my BLOOD. He doesn't like ME!" . . . The FUCK?! I really gave him a crazy look now. I knew it1 I just fucking knew it! He left me to go be a crack addict!! What the fuck?! And he fucked his brother???!!! EPIC EW!!! I think I just puked in my mouth. "Keiran, I am NOT a crack addict!" James looked at me, smiled really big and laughed. "And I did not fuck Colter. That's just wrong in so many ways." My heart melted away when I heard his laugh. It had been so long!. . . God, I am so gay. . . . . . Hold up. . . "I never called you a crack addict." I said, although I did think it. This is all too confusing for me. Why won't he just cut the small talk and tell me why he left me!? Ugh!! I fucking hate him right now!!! No I don't. I love him. Even if he's a little addicted to - whatever the fuck. "No, but you thought it." Creeeeepy. . . "So now you think I'm creepy?" James said. There goes my stomach again, jumping off those damn roller coasters. This is too much. Either I'm crazy, or he's crazy. But I think I'm perfectly sane right now! I'm the emotional one! Maybe he should give ME some of whatever he's taking. . . "I - I don't think you're creepy. I just - WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON, JAMES!? Why won't you fucking tell me?!" I started flailing my arms and ranting. "I just want to know why you left me! Don't you think I deserved to know THAT much?! Hell, just fucking tell -" "I'm a vampire." I hope you enjoyed reading this. As mentioned earlier, I appreciate constructive criticism. Chapter 3 will be posted as soon as I am finished writing! Thanks again! Jude Covenan