Chapter 13


Marcel's Pov


"Marcel are you ok?"

I turn to look at Cid.  I get back to the train and he's standing with a few of the hires.  He stares at me for a second but as he looks at me I realize that he's not in the best looking mood.  I'm kind of confused on what's going on but I don't say anything.

"Marx...have you seen Marx..."

I'm nervous.  I had planned on having a nice afternoon with Marx.  I missed him.  Truth was I couldn't get him out of my mind after all this time.  The fact that he just ran away from me confused the hell out of me.  What was going on in his mind?

Cid seems to be reacting to this.

He shakes his head.  I don't get it.

"Marcel..."

I have a feeling something is wrong by how he just lingers on.  It's rare to see Cid ever short on words by any means.  Cid always has a ton to say.  He's never short on words.

"What?" I ask, "What's wrong?"

"Marx is gone."

I feel this confusion all of a sudden.  My chest is caving in a little bit.  I don't admit it to the others but I'm feeling funny about it.

"What do you mean by he's gone?  Gone where?"

Cid looks at his staff.  Lucius and Antione work directly with him.  They give each others looks and then turn to walk away as though not wanting anything to do with what Cid is about to tell me.  Cid shakes his head at that moment. 

"He's decided to leave Marcel," Cid says.

"Leave and go where?"

"I don't know.  He signed these divorce papers before he went," Cid explains to me.

Cid hands me papers at that moment.  I look at the papers.  I'm shocked.  I'm hurt honestly.  I can't believe Marx would just leave like that.  He just ran off.  I look at the others.  They are preparing a stage in front of the gardens.  That is where the primary candidates will be announced.  The party picks the primary candidates but the people will vote for who is president.  The Gay Agenda party was always somewhat resistant to me.  It had to be because I never really cared to fight against the straights like the rest of them would.  I should be worried about the fact that I'm not going to win the primaries but instead of worrying about that I'm just worried about Marx.

A divorce?  Now.  

I shake my head and lick my lips, "Man, I don't get it.  Why would he want to divorce me?"

Cid shrugs, "I don't know.  This was an arranged marriage.  He probably started getting cold feet you know?  Maybe he's still upset about Silk."

"But he cares about me..." I say.

Cid raises his eyebrows, "Cares about you?"

"We vibe.  You know Cid.  You know we were really starting to like one another.  I don't see him just leaving like that.'

"Maybe there's someone else."

"Someone else?"

"How do you think he got away?" Cid asks me, "Maybe he cares about someone else Marcel.  Have you ever thought that he never wanted to marry you in the first place.  We basically forced him into something that he didn't want."

Cid shakes his head.

Everything Cid is saying is real.  Every part of it, but still I am not convinced.  Could Marcel really not have felt the same way about me that I felt about him?  Why would he just leave like that?  

"I...I was falling for him Cid," I admit.

The words come faster than I care to admit.  I hate it.  I hate that I was falling in love.  Florian was the last person that I fell in love with and Florian ended up being a fucking asshole.  I can't stand the fact that I'm falling for someone else again and all of a sudden he breaks my heart too. 

I just felt like Marx was...different.

There had to be another explanation.

"Maybe it's for the best," Cid states, "Now you can give the president what he wants.  If he endorses you, then you might get enough votes from the party to win."

"I'd have to marry Florian..."

"Yes..."

Cid nods.  He doesn't have any emotion behind it.  I guess I shouldn't expect him to have any real emotion behind it.  He cares about the big picture.  I should probably care about the big picture too.  He's right. 

Marx leaving does open the door for me to make a good political move.

"Did you tell him that?"

"Huh?"

I look over at Cid, "Did you tell him that it would be a good move for him to leave?  I hope he didn't leave because he thinks that's what I wanted.  I don't want to marry Florian.  So did he leave thinking that?  And Cid...don't you dare fucking lie to me."

My voice strays off.  It would make sense.  Marx wasn't one of us.  He was gay but he didn't know things about New Jerusalem.  He was innocent.  He had a pure soul.  It would make sense if he left because he thought he was helping me out.  I could see that.  

Cid looks at me dead in the eyes, "No.  Absolutely not.  Marx left for his own selfish reasons."

It's hard to believe.

"Cid don't fucking lie to me.  I can't take that..."

Cid shakes his head, "I didn't want to tell you this...but I think Marx was having an affair with Lexus Lucius..."





The afternoon passes quickly and I take a shot of bourbon.  I pour more into the cup and take some more.  I'm drunk.  I'm angry.  Cid felt like Marx was with Lexus.  Lexus was going to run on the same ticket as Nazarius.  I was sure Nazarius had planned this.  Nazarius was a fucking snake.  He was a worm.  I never wanted to beat anyone so bad. 

Before I know it I'm throwing the glass at the door barely missing someone walking in.

"Mr. Anthony?" Natasha says, "Should we prep you?"

They are at the door of my dressing room.  I'm backstage.  I'm drinking bourbon and I'm drunk.  I can't get Marx off of my head.  For some reason I just assume that he's going to show back up and it would have all just been a nightmare.

No way in hell that Marx could be gone. 

"I can prep myself."

"Mr. Anthony..."

"I said I can prep my fucking self," I tell the lesbian.  

I'm not in the mood for this.  I can't get Marx out of my head and this is beyond bad.  I am about to head out on stage for the elections.  I should be getting my mind in the game but truthfully I'm drunk.  Truthfully I'm too pissed to even focus on what I need to do.

Natasha shakes her head, "Ok sir.  I'll leave you to it.  The first election begins in two hours."

I nod, "Fine."

"Sir..."

"What Natasha?"

Natasha looks over at me.  She's fragile looking and looks a little out of it.  Her eyes are red.  I wonder if she's been crying.  Hell.  I was the one who just got left by my husband.  Regardless if it was a fakemarriage or not.  I should have been the one who was upset.  

Natasha crosses her arms and says the oddest thing, "I don't know why Marx left.  I really don't.  What I do know is that he cares about you.  He really did."

I want to believe it.  I really want to believe it.  Hell I did believe it.  But for him to just leave in the way that he left.  For him to just sign divorce papers.  It didn't make sense.  Marx was showing that he didn't want anything to do with me.  He didn't even say goodbye properly.

I shake my head at Natasha, "Sometimes love isn't that simple."
 
Every time I fell for someone I got my heart broken.  Love was...it was overrated.

"Sometimes it is,"  Natasha says so low that her voice is almost a whisper, "I'll leave you to your preparations though."

With that Natasha leaves.  She's a dreamer.  Both her and Latosha are dreamers.  But out of everyone the two of them spent the most time with Marx.  Maybe they knew what they were talking about.  Maybe Marx really did care about me.  I want to put it out of my mind but it's so hard.

I find myself going to the shower in the next few minutes.

The water doesn't ease me.  Instead I'm just thinking about Marx and for that moment I'm a young boy again.  All the pain from my first heartbreak comes back.  I loved Florian one time with everything I had.  And instead of him loving me back he put his career first.  And I started all of this just so that I can prove to Florian that I could be powerful to.  I wanted to WIN Florian back.  Now I had a chance to be with Florian and all I could think about was...Marx.

I get out of the shower, dripping wet.  The water is dripping off of my body.  I usually don't towel off.  I let the water air dry on my body.  It always wakes me up.  The cool breeze makes me feel alert when it conflicts against the warm water on my body.

I need to get Marx out of my head.  One way or another.

As I step out the bathroom and go into the room I hear the door open.

"Natasha, I said I don't need your help.  I know what I'm wearing..."

"All black always looked good on you," a voice replies.

It's not Natasha.  Someone else walked into my room without knocking.  That rarely happens here except for the preppers.  I'm standing there naked as the day when I see Florian looking back over at me.  

He stares up and down at my naked body.  I can tell he's attracted.  His eyes linger at the base of my dick.  At first I think about hiding it but it's nothing that he hasn't seen before.

"You don't believe in knocking?" I ask.

"I never knocked before..." Florian replies.

"You lost that right when you chose Nazarius over me."

Florian shakes his head, "I'm single now.  I separated from Nazarius.  I got a divorce."

I look over at Florian.  He is staring hard at my body.  He manages to make his way towards me.  He puts his hands on my body.  For a minute I'm pulled back there.  He's handsome.  He's so attractive.  If it was just based on looks, Florian was way more attractive than Marx.  

His body was tighter and more toned.  He was light brown.  I always liked light-skinned guys more.  He had a perfect smile.  He had a perfect stare.  Florian and I looked better than I looked with Marx.  People expected a guy like me to be with a guy like Florian.

Florian's fingers are on my sides.  They run down my abdomen.  His fingers tickle my balls slowly like he used to do a million times.  He starts to stroke my dick.  He knows just what to do.  He always has.  I can't help but to feel my dick harden.

"You mean Nazarius divorced you," I reply, "He used you and threw you away."

I push Florian back.  I can tell he's shocked when I do. His face drops to the ground.  I never pushed him away before.  I have a hard dick.  My body wants him but my heart...my heart wants Marx.

It's not about how attractive he is.  Florian is a snake.  He's a snake in the fucking grass and I know it.  

"That makes two of us getting divorced huh?" Florian says, "According to these papers Marx wants a divorce as well."

Florian is going through the papers on my nightstand.

I grab the papers out of his hand almost immediately.

"Mind your business Florian.  I'm warning you."

He laughs a little bit, "I notice you didn't sign them.  What are you waiting for?  I'm sure Cid can pull some strings.  You sign those papers and you can have your divorce finalized within the night."

I look down at the papers. 

I don't know what to do.  I want to rip them up.  I want to throw them away.  But what if this is what Marx really wants?  What if he really wants a divorce?  Was it right for me to keep Marx trapped in a marriage that he no longer wanted to be in?

"I'll sign them after I talk to Marx."

"Marx is long gone.  He doesn't want you, Marcel.  You make me an enemy.  How many times do I have to apologize for hurting you.  At least I'm here to apologize.  Where is Marx? "

I don't know how to answer that.  I am just standing there.  I'm feeling hopeless.

I am hesitating.

"I don't know," I reply.

"I didn't think so," Florian says, "He's not so different from me then is he?"

He's getting closer again.  Even as I pull away he presses against my naked body.  I manage to pull away one last time and start to put on underwear.  I'm thinking maybe that'll keep his hands off of me but it doesn't.  Before long Florian is desperately pulling at my underwear.  He's tugging at me.  He's grabbing and reaching. 

This time I hit Florian.  

I punch him right in his face.  I punch him so hard that Florian falls on the floor.  He looks like he is about to break out into tears or something like that. 

"He's nothing like you," I respond, "If I marry you...I'll do it for political reasons.  You hear me?  That is all I'd ever want from you.  Not sharing the same bed.  No sex.  No love.  You're probably used to it aren't you?  With Nazarius that is..."

"Fuck you."

Florian get's up off the floor and heads for the door.

"You wish you could," I reply to him.

By the time he slams the door I feel better.  I feel like I did a good thing but as I look at the divorce papers I know that I don't have a choice.  Marx has already showed that he wanted to get a divorce.  Now it was my turn. 



I am backstage before I know it.  I see the president.  He's talking to Cid.  Behind him are Florius and Florian.  Florius looks like a muscular and less attractive version of his brother.  That's not saying much though because Florian is a lot more attractive then I know.  There is a tiny cut underneath his eye possibly from where I hit him.  I can tell he tried to cover it up but it didn't work to well.  I know it's petty but this actually makes me feel good to see that. 

"Marcel, you look amazing," the president says, "Florian, you are going to be a lucky man."

Florian smiles, "People are going to love us together."

"Let's not any of us pretend like this is what I want," I reply to all of them, "It's not.  I want Marx.  People loved Marx and I together."

"The people will get used to you and Florian," the president replies, "And so will you.  Did you sign the papers or not."

The old rattlesnake gives me an eye.  He seems to sweat off negativity.  I look at him and I can feel how heated up and upset I am.  

Cid looks at me.  He's worried.  I know he's worried I'm going to tell the president exactly how to FUCK himself.  I want to tell the president that.  I want to walk off this damn stage.  But who would I be walking off the stage to?  Marx isn't waiting for me.

"We can't let Nazarius and Lexus win," Cid whispers in my ear.

I take a deep breath.

"What's the hold up.  Did you sign your divorce papers or not?" the president asks, "Because if you didn't I'll walk away right now.  No endorsement."

God knows how the The First Gentleman was able to convince the president to do this shady shit.  I expected it though.  These people lived off shady antics.   That was their bread and butter.  Seeing them act so shady didn't do anything but make me miss Marx even more. 

I hold up the paper.

"I signed it."

The president smiles.  He hands Cid the paperwork.  He puts his scaly, sickly, skinny fingers on my shoulder.  I shutter as I feel him on me.  I hate his touch.

"Nice doing business with you.  Now let's go get you a primary candidate."


=========================================================================



I win the primary election.  It's a landslide.  Nazarius and I are the primary candidates.  The other candidates don't stand a chance.  

I should be celebrating.  Everyone else on the campaign is celebrating.  Streamers are floating around the stage.  Cid has people bringing out champagne glasses.  Robots are serving it.  There is all this celebration around me but inside I just feel...cold...lost.

"You are officially single," Cid tells me, "I got the paperwork processed."

I don't know what Cid expects me to say.  Does he expect me to thank him.  He pours me some champagne.  I just spin against the glass.  I just imagine how sweet this moment would be if Marx was actually the one by my side.  

"Whatever..." I tell him.

"Listen, I know you miss him. I understand."

"You don't understand fucking anything.  All you care about is this fucking election," I tell him.

"And that's what you should be caring about as well," he tells me, "You should be worried about making sure that you are in the best possible situation.  I'm talking with Florian.  He wants a grand wedding.  I think that's best too.  A public spectacle...make the people forget about Marx as well too..."

He keeps going on and on.  Wedding plans. Stupid plans. 

He doesn't seem to stop.  He just keeps goddam going.  I feel the pressure in my body.  I hate this.  I hate this fucking feeling. 

"...I'm going to get the hotel."

The only good thing about this was the tour was over.  We didn't have to take this stupid express train across New Jerusalem anymore.  I was happy that was over with.  I walked away from Cid in mid-sentence.  I take a bottle of bourbon with me.

Maybe if I drink enough I'll stop thinking about Marx.  

"Excuse me?"

I turn at that moment.  There is a boy standing there.  I've never seen the boy before.  He's tall and lean.  As I look over at him his eyes glitter a little bit.

He doesn't look familiar.

"Are you Marcel?" he says.

The boy looks over at me. He looks desperate.  He has a on old clothing. 

"Who wants to know?"

"I'm sorry to bother you.  I'm new to New Jerusalem."

A newbie.  Why the hell was he in this sector?  Most of the newbies weren't allowed to reign freely. They were usually sent to the Education District.  And he looked a little old to be a new gay too.

"Let me see your measurements..."

The boy face flushes, "I don't have a scale with me right now."

He's very red in the face.  He looks beat up.  Usually they clean the new ones up when they come to New Jerusalem.  The more I look at him the more suspicious he gets.  Why the hell is this straight man here?  How the hell did he get here?

"That's ok.  I'll go get one..." I tell him.

I need to measure him.  As I walk away to get a scale from the guard I feel the boy grab me.  He pulls me close.  He pulls me hard.

"I'm not telling the whole truth."

"You're...you're an ILLEGAL!"

"SHH!"

I'm panicking.  I've heard of straight people making their way to New Jerusalem before but I never saw one in person.  My heart began to panic as the boy puts his hand over my mouth.  I think about screaming.  Cid and the security aren't too far away.  I can call them and get this man put into jail.  Him sneaking into New Jerusalem could be punishable by life in prison.

I look over at Cid.  I should scream out.  I should let them know.   Maybe this guy was part of the Straight Agenda.  Maybe he knew something.

"Give me one reason why I shouldn't turn you into the officials right now?" I ask this man.

The man shakes his head, "I don't have one.  Listen.  My name is Roman.  I just need to speak to your husband."

"My husband."

"Marx...he's a friend of mine."

I'm confused on who this is but the name sounds familiar.  Marx and I had light discussions a few times.  He would talk about a boy named Roman.  He would talk about his old friends back in the breeding grounds. 

This boy had to be someone from Marx's past.

This changed everything.

I grab the boy and lead him into the shadows.  The platform and people celebrating are still there.  Luckily everyone is too busy to see us escape to the shadows.  

"Marx isn't here," I stated shaking my head, "Do you have any idea where he is?"

He shakes his head, "No...no I risked everything to come here and to find him."

I shake my head, "Why?"

Roman looks over at me, "His life is in danger."

"Come again?"

"His life is in danger.  A man came to see us. The man offered to enhance Silk and I.  He said we would be able to come to New Jerusalem if we worked for him.  He said as security."

"The cyborg program?"

Roman nodded, "Yes, but it was a private deal.  I'm thinking it was illegal.  I'm not sure.  Either way Silk goes through the surgery first.   But when he gets out, he isn't the same.  It's almost like more than his body was changed.  I think the man messed with his mind as well..."

Fuck.

"Silk was brainwashed."

Roman nodded, "Yes.  And he kept talking about...killing Marx.  It was so weird.  For some reason the people who made Silk a cyborg wanted him to assassinate Marx.  I tried to talk to Silk but he was too far gone.  So I had to run away before they did surgery on me.  I got away just in time."

Marx was right.  Marx said that his friend Silk wouldn't have hurt him.  It made sense now if someone did brainwash Silk.  I didn't know people had the technology to do that but if they had the technology to change a man into half robot-half human than maybe they had the power to program him as well.  Why would someone want Marx dead though?  I was the one running for president.  He was just my husband.  What would someone get out of a dead Marx?

Then all of a sudden it clicked what Cid had told me.  

"Holy shit.  The straight agenda."

"Straight agenda?" Roman asks.

"Yes.  They probably wanted to hurt me.  Straight people probably wanted to hurt people in charge but taking away the people they care about."

Roman shakes his head, "No.  No...the person who worked on Silk wasn't a straight man."

That didn't make sense.  

"What?"

Roman turns at that moment and points, "There he is.  That's him!  That's the guy right over there.  That's the guy who brainwashed Silk.  That's the guy who wants Marx dead."

I'm confused.

But as I turn to see who Roman is talking about I am more than confused.  I am shocked. 

Roman is pointing at CID!


 

To read the next chapter go to www.crushedcrown.com