Date: Mon, 20 Sep 2010 00:48:31 -0700 (PDT) From: Cailen Vature Subject: Raven Chapter 11 PLEASE READ THESE DISCLAIMERS: This story is a very long work of gay erotic science fiction. There are some scenes of man on man action but it will not be a dominating factor in this story. So if you are looking for something to get off to you might as well turn around now. The names and places in this story are entirely fictitious, any relation to persons or events are entirely coincidental. HOWEVER: they are based off of real places and events to make the story seem more plausible. If you are underage, or this is illegal where you are, then please do the right thing... (Whatever that may be...) This story is copyrighted, ©2010. To me the author and it is therefore illegal to copy or use any part of this story without my written permission. Which leads me to: If you have any desire to get in contact with me for comments, directions to a good Beta, pictures, or music relating to the story, or for permission to use my story (for lord only knows what...) You may contact me at my email address: cailenauthor@yahoo.com Thank you: Cailen Part 2: The Phasing Moon The nighttime doth the shadow keeps Fear in mind the darkness creeps Will the sun arise in time? To save the child from its mind And in the mind the shadow dreams And nothing is truly as it seems Chapter 11: Deal or no Deal? I first realized I became aware when I heard the continual beep. I heard other sounds like distant voices and footsteps and gradually I felt the bed below me and the gentle pressure of the blankets above me. My mind told me to remain calm so I did so. I think it must have been drugs. I remember feeling drugged I kept my breathing even and listened to the room around me. I heard breathing to my left so I chanced it and tried opening my eyes. `Everything is white' I thought as I tried to blearily open my eyes in the hospital room. As my eyes adjusted I tried looking around I quickly evaluated that it was nighttime. I looked down and to my left and saw my mom asleep in one of the hospital chairs and beside her was none other than Ian. I was at first happy to see him but my mind struggled to understand how he could be there. Ian was reading a book but glanced up and looked shocked to see me looking back at him. He quickly set down the book and rushed to my side "Raven" Ian breathed into my ear Ian brought his hand over and gave mine a squeeze "Ian" I tried saying but it merely came out as a groan Ian let out the most brilliant heart stopping smile I had ever seen. My heart burned afresh and I had to shut my eyes to stop the tears from falling "How bad?" I asked "You'll be right as rain in a few weeks, you have a concussion and a black eye, a split lips a cracked rib, many bruises." Ian said "you were lucky, he managed to kick you in your solar plexus had I not come when I did, you would have died... he also... he..." "Corey" I said in both a form of a question and answer "Is expelled as are his friends, he'll be lucky if he avoids jail." Ian said "You saved me" "Yea... I guess I did" Ian said with a soft smile "Why?" I asked the question that had been burning in my heart. Why was I still alive? Was this part of god's plan for me? Is this some kind of sick joke? There was a silence that drew out forever leaving the ambient sounds of the hospital to come to the fore. Finally after what seemed like an eternity Ian finally spoke "There's an old saying `that one cannot truly appreciate what they have until they lose it.' I thought I lost you Raven and the very thought is like a knife in my soul." I closed my eyes and held his hand "I'm sorry I hurt you, and I am so sorry I said those awful things to you... Raven I... I..." "Ian I'm sorry too" I said "Dustin... I..." I listened to him raptly his blue eyes staring into mine and his beautiful face contorted in pain. He looked like my dark angel. "I held your body in my arms and you weren't breathing so I prayed to god. I said `Dear Jesus our Lord and Savior please save my love, he is the only one for me in this whole world. I need to be able to tell him I love him and I promise that I will love him and cherish him for my whole life... please lord spare him, please... Amen'" I stopped breathing again "After that you started breathing on your own until the ambulance arrived." Ian said "they managed to stop the bleeding enough for you to be transported here and after several surgeries you're back with us..." My mind processed everything he was saying and I just held his hand and smiled. "Dusty?" he asked "It's alright... I'm not leaving you... not today" I closed my eyes "You mean... you'll..." he asked "I'll be your boyfriend, if you're strong enough to have me" I said Just at that perfect moment mom woke from her slumber and shrieked "Baby you're okay!" she got up and hugged me fiercely which hurt but I didn't care it felt so good to be alive. "It's okay mom" I said "I'm alright" She pulled away from me and looked me in the eyes "I got to call your father" she kissed me on the cheek and darted out the door "I'm tired Ian" I yawned "Get some rest" Ian said holding my hand "Don't... don't leave alright?" I asked Ian smiled at me with his gorgeous blue eyes and smiled at me "They'll have to drag me bodily from the room... Promise." Ian said and with his promise barely finished my eyes closed and I drifted off to sleep. I woke up the next morning and I felt more alert, thought I was startled when I felt a shifting around my bed and saw a doctor standing over me recording the monitors. He had a clipboard in his hand and turned almost instantly when he saw I was awake. He came over and shined a light into my eyes and then putting the light back into his pocket he asked "How are you feeling today?" he asked me "I don't know yet..." I said "tired" "That's to be expected you've been on extremely high doses of pain killers and we've had to keep you knocked out for some time now... but the worst of it's over you're going to be alright." The doctor said "How long has it been?" I asked "You were brought in on Monday and today is Saturday" the doctor said glancing at the chart to confirm "you were in very rough shape and we weren't sure if you were going to make it, the worst was the damage caused by the intrusion in your rectum" My mind snapped to attention and flashes started jumping before my eyes I saw Corey standing over me kicking me repeated everywhere he could. I waited as Corey pulled down my pants and took out a dowel from shop class and he quite forcefully shoved it into my ass. Instantly a torrent of blood erupted from my punctured hole and they resumed kicking me. I was sure I heard some ribs crack. Suddenly I heard a crash behind me... it was Ian `It actually happened' I thought... it was real "Was it a dowel?" I asked "You were awake for that?" the doctor asked I nodded figuring I didn't want to explain that I saw it in a dream. The doctor gave me a squeeze on the shoulder. Leaning down closer and giving me a kind smile. "If anyone ever did that to my husband I'd be upset... that cutie hasn't left your side all week... he's refused to leave, his father even came down but he insisted that he remain here saying and I quote `Dad, you of all people should know that there are more important things than school' he's a keeper!" the doctor winked and I then realized that my left hand was still warm and looking down I saw Ian's head curled up at my side. He had pushed the chair against the bed and looked like he was sleeping very uncomfortably. My heart melted looking at him. "You're gay?" I asked the doctor "Yep, proudly married for three years now..." he smiled pulling out a wallet "these are our two children" I looked down and saw the doctor who was an older gentlemen with salt and pepper hair next to a man with balding blond hair. They were smiling holding two children who were obviously adopted but they looked so happy. For a second I saw a vision of my future with Ian. "They're beautiful" I said causing the doctor to smile "I think we might be able to put some food in you, with the damage back there I want to keep it light, soup and applesauce and the likes, you must be famished, I'll grab some meals for your mother and your friend too." The doctor said closing the clipboard giving me a smile and walked out of the room. I tried sitting up but it hurt to move, only now did I realize the pains in both my sides and my butt. I managed to get myself a little bit further up without the pain becoming severe and I got a real chance to look around my room for the first time. I was in a private room and I could see the sky from my window and not the ground so I had to be at least on the second floor or higher, my mom was gone but Ian was still sleeping in the chair pushed next to the bed his head was on the bed and he was still snoring softly. Along the back wall was literally a mountain of flowers and cards. My mind wandered to Ian sleeping peacefully. `He said he loved me' I thought to myself and our words from hours before seemed like a distant memory to me. I watched him sleeping and I thought of his father `Hell is reserved for faggots and sinners' He's been hiding this all this time... alone... "I had another gay friend who went through very much the same thing as you back at Duke... he never told me" "Yeah what happened to him?" I asked "He committed suicide" In that instant I realized the pain I had been feeling was nothing compared to his. Ian stood alone strong keeping his greatest desires aside. These strong feelings welled up within me and tears began to leak at my eyes and I gently placed my hand on top of his head. Ian woke instantly and rubbed his eyes looking at me he quickly became concerned "Raven... are you alright... are you in pain... I'll go get the nurse I..." "Ian I'm okay" I said giving him a sad smile holding out my hand He didn't appear to be convinced but he didn't leave either. "Ian..." I began but I could not think of even how to begin to say what I needed to say, there were no words, no expression to allow me to say it... instead my emotions tried and tears started leaking from my eyes. "Dustin... Raven... what is it... what's wrong?" Ian asked gently squeezing my hand and rubbing my arm. "I... I..." I stammered "You?" Ian asked "I don't want to be with you!" I spit out and a second after I said it I realized how horribly wrong it sounded `I don't want to be with you because of the emotional pain it will cause you, the fallout with your dad and the torture and the harassment you will endure for the rest of your life, I love you so greatly I want you to be free of me?' would probably of been better The look on Ian's face was like death and he stood there silently and I realized he had stopped breathing "Ian breathe!" I shouted and I saw his face was turning blue I yanked his arm which was still holding my hand and he lurched forward and as he did he steadied himself and took a huge gasping breath "You... don't want?" Ian gazed straight into my eyes "Ian I love you... I've loved you from the first moment I saw you" I said "But..." Ian asked "That's why... Ian, you're popular, you are a great guy, people like you. If you were to be with me, it'd all go away... your dad, you'd be disowned... or worse" I said remembering what Colin said to me and Ian seemed to understand what I was saying "it'd break my heart to do that to you, I love you the way that you are and it would kill me to put you through the pain I did... to have you... I want you, but to do that to you... to me feels selfish" Ian stood there processing everything I was saying. The phrase `the silence was deafening' came to my mind and finally he managed to speak "That's possibly the sweetest thing anyone has ever said to me, my whole life" Ian said and trust me that feels like forever" "I know it's been hard for you... Mark..." I began to say but Ian caught up to me "I was too young to realize what I was feeling for Mark, he was older than I was and again I didn't realize my feelings until it was too late and he was already gone..." Ian said "but you're still here I believe Jesus saved you because we're supposed to be together, I don't care if you don't believe but I do, I don't care what my father thinks abo..." "How can you say that he's your dad?" I nearly shouted "Family comes first" "I see this is causing you pain and it means a lot to you" Ian said I nodded "Is there any way we could..." Ian struggled with the word "negotiate" to avoid you... "Not wanting me?" he asked mimicking my earlier words I really had no idea where he was going with this. "Okay" I agreed "We don't tell anyone, not my dad not yours not anybody... these feelings are new and strong so let's see where they lead and you and I can explore our relationship in private... if it comes to a point where we are ready to `come out of the closet' we can address that at a later time?" Ian asked I didn't like the idea of keeping it a secret but between this and my option I was willing to agree... on one condition "You have to break up with Amanda" I said Ian actually smiled "I'd never pin you as the jealous ty..." "Take it or leav..." I began to interrupt but Ian interrupted me "Deal" Ian smiled and leaned in and gave me a sweet gentle kiss on the lips