"What do you mean aliens?" I ask.
I have to admit I say it in the most annoyed way. I'm expecting Jax to give me some scientific explanation to how he and the other students who went to Mars survived and he was telling me that aliens did it.
Greg's dumb ass clearly seemed to
believe him, "Oh my god...really?"
"Jax be serious, really aliens? Listen if you don't want to tell me what really happened then you don't have to. If you want to keep your secret then that's ok with just say that. I'd respect that more."
Jax looks at me with a serious face.
"I'm not lying to you. Intelligent life is out there."
Jax is breathing heavy. Greg looks interested. I look annoyed. This is some bullshit. I didn't believe in Aliens. I didn't believe in any of this shit. It didn't make sense. If there were aliens around then why haven't they communicated with us yet? What were they waiting for?
Why the fuck would Captain LaPerla want to keep that a secret.
"I should leave man," I say.
I feel disrespected. Jax is lying straight to my face.
I'm stopped though by Jax. He pulls at my arm, "Stop. I'll tell you
"Please do, but I want the truth?" I stated.
I wasn't trying to hear some alien explanation.
"Listen, the wormhole happened.
We were on our way back to the space station in the small shuttle. All
of a sudden we are sucked into the wormhole," he explains, "We are lost in
space when we get to the other side. We don't see the space shuttle.
We all think we are pretty much done for. We don't have supplies
that'll last. We were getting desperate, and right when we are about to
give up. All of a sudden there were these lights."
Greg's eyes get wide, "Lights?"
"Lights," Jax explains, "We were taken."
"Like abducted?" I ask Jax.
Jax nods his head, "Exactly."
"And what did they look like Jax?" I ask at that moment, "These aliens?"
Jax shrugs, "I don't know. The room was so bright. It was a blinding light. Most of the times we kept our eyes close because the light hurt to keep them open. We were restrained, and we never got to see them in the bright lights. That's how we know they had come the lights..."
I couldn't believe Jax was feeding us this shit.
Greg has his hand on his chest, "I
knew this would happen."
"How the fuck did you know this would happen?" I ask Greg.
"For a smart guy you're acting real
dumb. We are in a different part of space. Do you know how
expansive space is? There has to be aliens."
"And what are the chances we go through a random wormhole to a universe where they exist?"
"They DO exist," Jax argues with me at that moment as though I'm irritating him, "We were given food and drink. Then we were studied. It was like they wanted something we may have had. They thought we had it and they wanted it."
"What---so these aliens were the ones who opened the wormhole?" I asked.
"No. No they didn't."
"How do you know?" I ask.
"They seemed surprised we were there."
"They told you that?"
Jax hesitates for a moment, "Not exactly. They didn't speak English. I didn't understand their communication."
"Holy shit," Greg is stating, "Like did they probe you?"
Jax shakes his head, "Not exactly. We were studied one at a time. It was almost like...I don't know...almost like they were looking for something. You know. They were examining us...for something. I'm not sure what it was. Needless to say, they didn't find what they were looking for. They gave us food and water enough to survive in space for a while. They gave us back our shuttle. And they disappeared...just like that."
I'm just sitting there. Jax is just sitting there. Greg is rocking back and forth as though a little worried and a little excited. Every part of me is struggling not to give Jax the meanest eye roll.
"Listen..." I finally say breaking
up the silence, "I'll find out what really happened?"
Jax face looks almost hurt at that moment.
"You don't believe me?" Jax asks.
story is a little bit unbelievable..."
"Wait," Jax's forehead wrinkles up as though concerned at my reaction to his bogus story, "You really don't believe me? You really think I just made that up. Why would I lie to you? You are supposed to be my man and you aren't believing what I tell you?"
He's sensitive. This is hitting a sensitive spot with him.
I can't help but to laugh a little
bit, "Jax. I'm not Pia and no offense. I'm not
Greg. I'm a highly educated guy with my own opinion. I just am
saying I don't believe in aliens. That's all I'm saying. That just
wasn't a theory of mine."
"Yeah you're a little too fuckin' smart," Greg butts in.
I look over at Greg. He is
just eating up this fable that Jax is telling. It's
clear to me that Jax must have made this up to get me
off his back. It's clear to me that Jax is just
trying to come up with something so I won't keep asking him how he survived in
space. Alien abduction was the line he was feeding me and Jax seems disappointed that I'm skeptical.
Greg seems like he is two steps away from having Jax go into every little stupid detail about his little fable. Truthfully, I've heard enough but I'm standing around attempting not to piss Jax off anymore.
"Greg can you please...please mind your business?" I ask him, "This is between Jax and me."
"No it's not between us," Jax explains.
"Wait what is that supposed to mean?" I ask him.
"If it was between us you should believe what I'm telling you," Jax responds with this high frustration in his voice.
"I'm not saying I don't believe you.
There are other things besides aliens. Maybe you became delirious from
lack of nutrition when you guys were lost. Maybe exotic matter in the
wormhole caused a mental effect with you..."
"I'm FUCKING TELLING YOU it's aliens!" Jax screams at me, "If I told you the sky was fuckin flat and unicorns prance around with leprechauns in the middle of the night you should believe me."
I laugh. Jax is so serious right now. He is getting upset. I can hear it in his voice.
"Because I'm your fucking man!"
"Jax you aren't my man..." I correct him.
"Wow..." he responds before I could finish.
I've hit a nerve. I can tell I did. Jax isn't even looking at me now. He's walking away. I've never seen Jax so passionate about one topic that wasn't even personal. He is shaking his head at this moment and there is a distraction that I don't really understand with him.
"Listen I'm not trying to say it like that," I quickly attempt to rebound and make my way over to him, "I just meant to say that I'm not your man yet. We are working towards that."
I attempt to grab on Jax's arm but
he pulls away. Jax is pissed! It's clear
that he's pissed. He's not giving me any sort of life right now. He
is looking away at the distant wall.
"You said what you said, and you're right. I'm not your man. Dre is. Go listen to his side of the story."
"Jax you are tripping right now!"
Jax is completely ignoring me. He's just sitting there. He's just shaking.
"Maybe you should leave," Greg tells
me, "You're really upsetting Jax and this has to be a
hard time for him."
Greg was kicking me out of their room. Greg was kicking me out of their room and Jax wasn't stopping him. That was the fucked up part.
I ignore Greg and turn to Jax, "Jax I'm not trying to upset
you. I told you I'd break up with Dre. I mean it. I want to
be with you. I'm sorry I upset you. I know you're upset and I feel
like we can at least agree to disagree on this one for now..."
That wasn't enough for Jax. Agreeing to disagree wasn't an answer for him.
He sighs a little bit, "Maybe you should leave, man. Greg...you mind locking the door when Dre's boyfriend leaves."
Jax puts emphasis on the Dre's boyfriend part. It's clear he wants it to resonate with me. I'm standing there at that moment feeling helpless to the man that I care about. He's in his feelings and it's because of me. In a matter of minutes, Jax seems to pick up the little pride I've left him with and walks into his bedroom. I don't follow him. It's clear he doesn't want me around.
Greg smiles at me as soon as Jax closes his bedroom door "Don't worry. I'll take
good care of him."
Greg smiles again, "No you can't
fuck me. I'm trying to have Jax do that
Greg is trying me at that moment. It's clear he's trying me. It must have really gotten under his skin to see Jax and I being intimate earlier. I can tell that he seems to have a sour spot when he stares at me. Now he was getting under my skin. He was doing a good fucking job at it too. I can feel my fists about to ball up that Greg would be that disrespectful to my face.
I want to hit him. I want to knock the fuck out of him.
"You know what...it's not even worth
Greg snickers as he walks away.
I'm attempting to keep my cool.
This is all my fault anyway. I leave their room and begin walking
away. Truthfully, all I know is that I've upset Jax.
But is it a control thing for Jax that he wants
me to believe his bogus story. Does he really believe that he encountered
aliens out there? Did he want me to believe that story?
But he was so fucking passionate about it.
What if he's right?
What if we weren't alone...?
"He actually said there were
Aliens?" Jae Jae asked.
I can't help but to spill the beans to Jae Jae the next morning. We are in between classes. Class has become one big ass counseling session after Peter's suicide. It seemed to be the common thread that each teacher wanted to discuss. The fact that Peter killed himself seemed to be on everyone's mind. Jae Jae was sure that it was coming from Captain LaPerla. He said she was attempting to make sure that none of us followed Peter's lead and committed suicide.
Truthfully, I could see it in people's eyes. They were losing hope about us ever getting back to Earth. Suicide though? Suicide was a different story. I still didn't believe Peter killed himself.
pissed off that I don't believe him," I respond, "Like he was so pissed off
that I'm not sure if he still wants to be with me at this point."
Jae Jae rolls his eyes, "Really? That's dumb."
"You think so?"
"Yeah. I got to warn Kaysha. Jax will probably end up being the kind of dad who gets pissed off when kids figure out the tooth fairy and Santa Claus aren't real."
I don't want to be the bearer of bad news to Jae Jae but I doubt Kaysha's kid is ever going to grow up to learn about Santa Claus or the tooth fairy or any of that. This space station wouldn't survive floating around in space for that long. Our oxygen was draining by the hour. Jae Jae must be pushing it to the back of his mind though. So I allow it. I just shrug and force a smile.
"Speaking of Kaysha, maybe you can ask her about her side of the story," I tell him.
Jae Jae puts on his fakest blank stare, "Kaysha?"
"Stop the bullshit already," I respond, "Clearly you and her are together now."
"We aren't together. Damn. People are beginning to assume you and Jax are back together too. I'm not the only one in this gray area."
The way things went last night with Jax I'm worried if this thing between us would ever happen.
"Well if Jax
and I are in a gray area and he told me then Kaysha
should tell you."
"Listen I asked her. I did. She won't say."
"Why don't you ask Kaysha?"
We stop talking. We stop
walking because Bambi and Chyna are walking towards us. Nosy ass Bambi is
in our business within a matter of seconds. Chyna is close behind her.
I watch as Chyna gets close to Jae Jae.
Now I know what Jae Jae is referring to as the
gray area. Had he not had a conversation with Chyna officially about him
wanting to be back with Kaysha?
I am in no position to judge though especially with what's going on with Dre. Like a true friend, I sit there and pretend like I don't notice Chyna grabbing onto his arm.
See no evil.
"Ask Kaysha what?" Bambi asks me.
"Just...something," I say attempting to keep the secret.
"The alien encounter," Chyna quickly adds.
"Oh that thing," Bambi states.
"You guys know about it?" I ask.
"Greg and Jax
told us last night about it," Bambi states, "I guess Jax
was kind of tripping that you didn't believe him."
"I mean its bullshit..." I respond.
"Why do you think that?" Chyna asks, "I believe him."
I ignore Chyna and look over at Bambi, "Bambi please tell me that you have a little bit more sense than to believe some alien bullshit?"
Bambi isn't herself about it.
She just stands there suspiciously for a minute. She looks like she
is going to say something. Then she stops for a minute. The three
of us look at her wondering what she wants to say. Bambi opens up her
mouth again and struggles to say something, "Well..."
"Spit it out. I know you know something," I tell her.
I'd been around her long enough to know when Bambi had some tea. Right now she had something but she wasn't going to say.
"No...no...never mind," Bambi responds.
"If she doesn't want to say let's just drop it," Jae Jae responds, "I'll try to talk to Kaysha about it again. I don't think it'll work. She is so embarrassed about the pregnancy thing that she barely wants to talk about the year they were gone. She doesn't want to talk to me about it at least. Honestly Mario you probably would have better luck."
Everyone looks at me.
"You still mad at her?" Jae Jae asks.
"Listen not so much mad but I'm not going to fake being friends with someone that betrayed me," I honestly explain to him.
"That's a double standard. You forgave Jax," Jae Jae responds.
"With all due respect I love Jax."
Bambi butts in, "I think you should at least talk to Kaysha. How about we all talk to her? A group of us pressure her at the party tonight."
"More like a formal dinner that Captain LaPerla is hosting," Jae Jae responds, "Thought I told you about it. The Captain's having an event. I think she is hoping it would raise morale...or...whatever. She is hoping everyone doesn't end up killing themselves like Peter....oh...sorry...Mario...too soon?"
"Peter didn't kill himself," I respond.
The other three look at me. They don't believe me. It's clear. I kind of feel how Jax must feel with me not believing him about this alien encounter that he had.
"Right..." Chyna states without really saying much.
"It's ok. You don't have to believe me," I respond before crossing my arms, "I'll talk to Kaysha tonight at this event. I'm going to figure out what happened, one way or another."
The dinner is beautiful. I have no doubt in my mind that Captain LaPerla is trying to raise morale. She has redesigned the entire lunchroom into small banquet tables. Candles are on each banquet table. There is a small dance floor in the middle of the room. Buffet food is set up on the far right hand corner. It looks like the best food that we've had on the space station yet.
"Funny someone kills himself and we
get the royal treatment," Dre states, "Just don't think this is a time to be
Dre is at the table with me. He has a tuxedo on. He's handsome. He's sexy and well kept. He met me there. I assumed he was going to be pulling a shift for Pia here with the other servers or something. That isn't the case though. He's here sitting at the table and I kind of wish he was working for Pia. He's literally found a way to bulldoze himself onto the table that I'm sitting at. Jae Jae and Chyna are across from me. At the other side of the round table are Bambi and some new project she's been working on. Kaysha is sitting there looking out of place probably because Jae Jae is next to Chyna.
"That's your boss..." I whisper.
"What did you just say?" Dre asks me.
"Oh nothing, never mind," I tell him.
Just at that moment, my breath is taken away anyway. Jax walks into the room. I'm annoyed because he is with Greg but I don't even notice Greg for long. Jax walks in with a white suite. He might as well be fucking naked. He's so fucking sexy with his form fitted suit. Its tailor made for him no doubt. As he walks to me, he turns to the side. His tight pants are hugging his ass like nobody's business. His shoes shine. His skin flickers in the light of the room.
That is when Jax and I make eye contact. At first I think he is too mad to enough pay me any attention. Desperately from across the room I smile.
I'm not sure if he is smiling back...but he isn't grimacing either. He damn sure isn't looking away. He's just staring at me attempting to figure me out.
"Hey try the steak, it's amazing," Dre tells me out of nowhere.
He literally attempts to shove the food in my mouth. Maybe he's attempting to be sexy. He comes across as desperate for attention though. I wonder if it's because he noticed me staring at Jax. Maybe he realized that when Jax walks into the room nothing else matters.
"Not really hungry right now..."
"C`mon. Let me feed you. It's sexy. Isn't this the type shit you like...PDA or whatever..." Dre tells me.
"Dre relax. Yo.
At one point maybe that is what I wanted but..."
I am hesitant. I'm trying not to cause a scene. Kaysha is sitting on the other side of Dre. She can probably hear the conversation. Bambi is always paying attention to her surroundings. Even with her new project around her, she seems to have her radars set on what's going on between Dre and me.
"Maybe we should take a walk and talk about this," I tell Dre.
Dre looks irritated. Maybe he looks embarrassed that I didn't let him feed me at the table. I'm not sure where the aggression is coming from but it's clear that he's annoyed at me.
"No. Why don't you just fuckin' say it man. What's the problem?" Dre asks.
He's getting loud. He's so aggressive.
"I think you know," I explain to him.
Dre would have to be stupid as hell not to know and I don't think he was stupid. At this point, I don't think Dre was even living in denial. Dre was just bidding time until it happened. I didn't want to do it at this table. I wanted to do it in private.
I had to break up with Dre. I just had to break up with him.
"I'm not going to let you do what you're about to do..." Dre tells me.
He knows me well. That's the thing. We weren't just lovers out of nowhere. We were best friends. He knows I want to break up with him. This isn't me beating around the bush.
"It's not you," I tell Dre, "It's..."
"Sorry to interrupt," a voice says.
Dre and I turn to my side. I hadn't even notice Jax walking up to us. Jax is looking down at me. Dre had to notice how I look at him. Dre has to notice how my eyes line Jax's body like he is some second coming prophet. I watch his lips as though he is going to tell me the secrets to the universe. I react to Jax as though every action he does is that sickening wormhole...sucking me into his exotic darkness and spitting me out wherever he'd like.
Jax had an effect on me and it was clear as fucking day to anyone watching closely. And Dre...he watched...very very closely.
"This is NOT happening right now."
"Dre you know this isn't working..."
"You are not about to do this..." Dre explains.
I'm not sure if he is telling Jax that Jax isn't about to interrupt us or is telling me that I'm not about to play him for Jax.
Either way Dre is completely wrong.
"May I have this dance?" Jax asks.
I feel bad for Dre. I feel like a dickhead. Maybe there is another way to do this but I was a fool for Jax and fools don't make the best decisions.
I smile, "Of course."
Before I notice it, Jax has pulled me into the middle of the dance floor. He has a confidence that rubs off on me almost immediately. I've never danced to classical music. I find the shit kind of boring to be honest with you.
I'm sure people are watching us. It's not the most natural thing to see two grown men being gay in the middle of the dance floor dancing slowly. It's especially odd when one of the men is the popular Jax Christopher.
"I don't know what I'm doing," I admit to Jax.
"Don't worry. I got you.
I always got you."
He grabs me by waist and shows me how to step. On time to the beat, we rock back and forth being careful not to bump into the other dancers around us. After a few minutes, I find myself in the rhythm and begin to lose myself in his eyes.
"I didn't know you liked classical music," I say to him.
"I like all kinds..." he says,
"Beauty is beauty to me, regardless of the form."
"Is that why you're a straight man dancing with a gay man."
"I don't do labels," Jax responds and smiles pulling me closer, "I'm a man whose fallen for another man, simple as that."
With that, Jax pulls me close. He smells so perfect.
"I'll take that as you not being mad at me anymore huh?" I ask.
"Don't push your luck," he responds
with a sly smirk, "You were actin' up, but when you care about someone there
are different ways to punish them, like in the bedroom."
"Shit I might like that..." I say.
Jax bites his lip.
"Stop looking at me like that boy. We have eyes looking at us. You'll get me all hard in these slacks and really give people something to look at."
I laugh a little bit at him. I look around. I'm not surprised that Dre is one of the people staring at me. He looks upset. I'm also surprised at Greg desperately staring at us. Its clear Greg would be happy if he could get his way with Jax.
"Listen. All jokes aside," I
tell him all of a sudden, "I should have had your back. Like Greg did.
I should always believe what you say, even if it has to do with alien
abductions or what not."
Jax stops dancing for a second and steps back.
"Shut the fuck up. Mario Kane
doesn't have a theory and a hypothesis. He's stepping out on faith.
Shit...I guess I really can die happy..."
I push him across his chest and pull him back close, "Boy shut up."
I grab him close and we start dancing again. I don't know what makes me do it but I find myself burying my head in his shoulder. Jax's confidence is rubbing off on me. It's clear he doesn't give a fuck about being called gay. He doesn't give a fuck about what people think of him. He's not like how Dre was. He's not like Greg. Jax knows who he is and that's what I love the most about him.
"We will get there with the trust," Jax whispers softly into my ear almost as though he's serenading me, "Greg is my best friend. He's been there through it all."
"Now Jax, we both know Greg wants to be more than your friend. Tell the truth. If he wasn't so DL would the two of you would be together now?"
Jax hesitates for a while.
"No. I'm into you. He understands that. He accepts it."
I roll my eyes, "Man bullshit. He's jealous. He wants to be with you. You can't break up and be friends with your ex. I just don't believe in that."
"Do you plan on being friends with Dre after you break up with him?"
"Yeah I guess. That's different though."
"How so? Look Greg is a friend, just a friend. You'll have to accept him as my friend. In the same way I'll accept Dre as your friend...whenever you decide to let him know the two of you have to end this relationship bullshit you have going on..."
"I think I already did."
Jax seems confused, "Did what?"
"I broke up with him."
Jax gets quiet at that moment. We are dancing in circles around one another. We are holding each other close. He's quiet. We're dancing even after the music stops for a second. It doesn't matter. It's almost like Jax is dancing to a beat in his own drum.
He's so quiet. He is holding me so close. The warm manly smell nestles my nose. His muscular arms hold me tight. He's so warm. I'm falling so deeply in love with him as every second passes. This is the definition of happiness at this moment.
There isn't anything that can fuck with us. There isn't any alien or any jealous ex that would matter.
"You're so quiet," I tell him.
"I'm just happy. I'm just
thinking man. I mean. You single now, and shit, I'm single now, and
shit, you know..."
"Don't tell me you're nervous," I tease him, "Not Jax Christopher."
"Yo, shut the fuck up. I've been waiting a while to say this," he laughs.
"Ok. Go on. We're single, now what."
Jax sighs a little bit, "I'm saying I want to be your man.
Since we first saw each other we knew it'd get to this moment right here
right now. I want you to be mine, you know. Not us
sleeping together and getting caught. No. I want to sleep together every
day. I want us to be committed. What I'm saying is a want a relationship
not a DL relationship. I want a real relationship. And I want to
show everyone what that fuckin means..."
I nod, "Man hell yeah."
Jax leans in and kisses me in the middle of the floor. His lips are soft. They press up against me. He pushes so hard against me that am leaning back, but he catches me with his arm. He's literally tilting me over and putting his tongue in my mouth. I grab onto his back with one hand and to his strong muscular ass with the other hand. I hold on for dear life as he gives me the kiss that would shake the entire fucking universe.
When he kisses me, I realize that Dre is storming out of the room. He's seen a kiss. If he didn't get the idea before this, he is definitely getting it now. I feel bad. A part of me wants to chase behind him but I don't want to give him any false hope. The breakup between Dre and I was long overdue. This had to happen even if it was sealed with a kiss.
Just as he let go of me sirens started going off.
"What the fuck?" Jax asks.
There is panic all of a sudden, as the sirens start sounding. I turn to my right to see some staff members running out. They are running out of the cafeteria towards the star bridge that looks out into space. Something is definitely happening.
My heart is racing.
"Come on," I respond to him.
Students are piling out of the
cafeteria. There is a chaos. My heart is racing. I won't let
go of Jax's hand though. I won't let go of it.
We keep running. The last time we heard sirens something horrible happened. The last time the ship alarm went off my entire world was sent upside down.
This wasn't happening again!
It couldn't happen again.
"Baby...c`mon I got you," Jax tells me.
He's holding on tightly. Before I know it, he's taking the lead. He's pushing people out of our way. He's making sure we aren't run over. Even in the midst of all the chaos, I realize that Jax just called me his baby. The happiness that I feel gets left out when we make it to the bridge all of a sudden. We get to the star bridge and we are blinded.
I can't see a fucking thing on the bridge. I literally have to shut my eyes.
"Is this a wormhole?" I ask Jax.
I can't see out the window. Whatever is shining a light on the moon bridge is so fucking bright that it is damn near blinding us. It's almost like we were floating directly into a star. The bright light causes us to have to look away.
I can't see what's past the light. I'm so nervous but not as nervous as Jax is.
"No," Jax responds.
"Jax...are you ok?"
His palms are sweating. He's shaking. He's afraid. He's horrified.
Jax pulls me close and whispers to me "Its them, I told you that we were not alone."
To read the next chapter go to www.crushedcrown.com