“You piece of shit! You fucking piece of shit! You snuck on this fucking space station!” I am screaming at Dre at that moment.
Dre doesn't think I am supposed to be reacting like that. I'm causing a scene. I'm acting ghetto. I know that I am but at this moment I am beyond pissed. I see Dre immediately getting a little upset. People are looking my way at that moment.
“Shh...oh now you want me to be quiet?”
Dre is sweating at
this moment, “I'm sorry about trying to steal your ticket
Mario. Honestly. I don't know what I was going through. You know
this was my dream Mario. I wasn't thinking.”
“It was both our dream. You fucking hurt me Dre. That's some fucked up shit.”
I'm beyond pissed right now. I'm trying not to completely go off but I'm making a scene. Everyone is turning around in the auditorium right now. I can see members of the Dollhouse standing over there. They are laughing. I don't care at that moment though.
Dre shakes his head
at that moment, “Mario...I'm sorry.”
I want to believe him. Looking in his eyes a part of me actually does believe him. Dre is a Latino boy about 6'0”. He has a huge blowout and he's always been a real handsome looking guy. He has these really light brown eyes that make him look distinct. He's always been one of those real handsome boys that just stuck to himself. We met because we were both interested in astronomy. He wanted to be an Astronaut. He figured he'd join NASA after college. That was his dream. The thing about his dream though is that we shared it.
Dre had done fucked up shit before but he'd always give me this look that made me just forgive him. He'd sink his brown eyes into me and all of a sudden I wouldn't care about any of the bullshit anymore. Right now I wondered if it is going to work but all I feel is anger instead.
“Man FUCK your apology!”
“Is there a problem here?” a voice says.
I turn at that moment to see Captain Mia LaPerla. The beautiful captain is standing there with her staff. I'm causing a scene so it is understandable that they would walk over and say something to me.
I look over at Dre. He's looking at me hoping that I won't rat his ass out for sneaking on board. I should rat him out though. I should let her know.
But then I look at Jae Jae. If I rat out Dre they'll want to know how he got on board. Me ratting out Dre would be me ratting out Jae Jae as well.
I can see Jae Jae sweating at this moment slowly shaking his head no in the background.
“No...” I say looking Dre dead in my eyes, “No problem.”
I can't concentrate.
This trip has turned completely around. It sickens me to my stomach
to know that Dre is on the boat. I just can't stand it.
The first day of classes is me just sitting around steaming. By lunch time we are all gathered in the cafeteria. The Cafeteria on the Exodus is definitely cool. All the food has some sort of space theme going on with them. The steaks are cut into the shapes of the moon. The fruit bar is arranged on a star table. I should be really getting into everything but I'm not. I barely even notice the roof of the cafeteria that is outlined in stars. I haven't even eaten and I'm barely listening as Kaysha is discussing her experiences in her classes.
“Mario you listening?” Kaysha asks me.
I wasn't paying attention. I was looking around the room trying to see if I could spot Dre. When I do spot him I realize that he's sitting by himself in the corner of the room. He's always been like that. He's a loner. I was his only real friend. A part of me feels bad at that moment but then a flashback of him grabbing my ticket out of my hand comes into my mind. All of a sudden I'm back to being pissed off again. I can't believe I trusted him and I'm sure I'm not going to trust him again.
“What...Kaysha? I'm sorry,” I respond.
“I was asking
what classes are you most excited about? Astrobiology, Physics,
studies in Stars, Galaxies and Cosmology or something else?”
I have barely been paying attention in the classes that she was talking about. Most of the classes I had with people that I barely knew. I was hoping that I had at least one class with Kaysha or Jae Jae so I wasn't completely alone. There was still a chance after lunch though for me to be able to do that.
“I don't know.
I guess I am looking forward to Astrology,” I respond, “I
know that's not really a real class but whatever...”
My voice trails off. Dre has gotten up at that moment at his table. He looks awkwardly around. He clearly doesn't have a group of kids to sit with like everyone else. He gets up and walks out of the cafeteria.
Jae Jae catches my eyes and what I'm looking at, “You guys were close weren't you?”
“You and that boy Dre,” Jae Jae corrects.
I look over at Dre. I don't want to talk about him. They have no idea how close we were...
“Something like that. Not anymore. Not after he tried to steal my ticket.”
Kaysha rolls her eyes, “Fuck him. You have some real friends with us. Ain't that right, Jae Jae?”
Jae Jae nods almost immediately, “Hell yeah. Especially after you didn't rat out that snake. I mean I would have been in trouble too. I owe you big time. And I want you to know that I would have never helped him get on board if I knew he was that kind of person.”
I smile at Jae Jae. He's cool. So is Kaysha. I've never been surrounded by a lot of people. It's always been me and Dre. It was rare that guys in our neighborhood were interested in the stars. Dre was the only one that I had something in common with. That changed now. I had people around me who were all like me. I could start over...even if Dre was around.
Kaysha rubs my back,
“Let's change the subject. I got some hot gossip...”
I sigh a little bit looking over at Kaysha, “Oh lord. I already know who it's about.”
Kaysha nods, “Trouble in the dollhouse. Look over there. Look how their talking...”
Jae Jae and I look over at where Kaysha is. She's looking over at the Dollhouse. I see Jax sitting there. He's talking to Pia. None of them are eating. It's kind of weird. They are just sitting at a table not eating. I guess they didn't have to. I saw a whole kitchen in Jax's dorm. They didn't look happy at all.
“What's the problem...besides the fact that they don't eat?” Jae Jae ask.
they don't eat,” Kaysha responds, “Not in public. They
just come to lunch to be social. That's not what I'm talking about
though. Look at Jax's face...”
I look at Jax. He's beyond handsome. Fuck.
“Perfect skin...” I slip up and say.
Jae Jae and Kaysha look over at me. I see Jae Jae raise an eyebrow.
Shit. I sound so gay at that moment. My face flushes with red. I can't help but to stare at Jax. He's so sexy. It's hard not to be taken by him. He's perfect. There isn't a flaw on his skin. It's almost like he is a doll. He's perfect. He is the prototype for male sexiness. Just looking at him my heart is racing and it's hard for me to ignore it.
I have a crush and if I'm not careful people are going to start realizing I am gay.
Luckily Kaysha changes the topic, “I wasn't talking about his skin. I'm talking about his body language. He's upset. Look. Don't you see?”
I am noticing what Kaysha is talking about right now. Jax has his arms crossed. Right next to him his friend Greg looks like he's talking to the girl that he was having sex with. I forget her name but that girl seems a little uncomfortable at the table. Across from her is Bambi, the beautiful. Bambi seems entertained by something. I'm not sure what it is. Then I see Pia. Pia looks...embarrassed. Something is definitely happening at that table. It's clear as day that something is happening.
Of course Kaysha would be the first one to notice.
“Who cares about those rich bastards?” Jae Jae asks me.
“Um...everyone...you must not have noticed,” Kaysha replies.
Kaysha is right. Everyone in the cafeteria stares at them from time to time wondering what is going on at the Dollhouse table. Everyone is interested. Everyone wants to be them. Everyone wants to know them. It's easy to see. I mean we were among a sea of basics and nerds. That was the beautiful table. They looked like they were modeling at the damn table or something.
“Jax looks so...I don't know...unhappy,” I respond.
“Look...look..look...” Kaysha says at that moment.
I realize what she's talking about. Jax gets up from the popular table at that moment. He doesn't say anything but he just starts to walk away at that moment. I notice Bambi laughing as he walks away. Pia looks embarrassed. She smiles embarrassingly, waits a few seconds and then walks out after Jax.
“Trouble in paradise,” Jae Jae responds.
“I wonder what's happening,” I say.
Everyone was. There was whispering all around the cafeteria when Pia walked out after Jax. It's at that moment I realize the drama in the Dollhouse was probably more interesting than the stars to a lot of people on this space station.
Astrology class was about to start. I was excited about Astrology. I mean it was really a study. I walked in the class immediately and took a seat basically at the front of the class. The teacher smiles at me as though he recognizes me which I am sure he doesn't. He has this huge quirky looking smile on his face. He looks interesting enough to the point that I'm actually excited about being in the class.
We're waiting for the class to start but all of a sudden I realize someone takes a seat next to me.
I turn to my right to see Dre.
I get up at that moment, “I'm not doing this with you. Not today.”
“Are you serious?”
I don't respond to Dre. I just walk away. I find a single seat on the other side of the room. I can't believe that Dre is here. I can't believe that I actually have a class with him. He just seems to try to find a way to ruin every experience for me. This was the class I was looking the most forward to.
The class starts as the quirky teacher looks around at everyone. He smiles a little bit.
He shouts it at the top of his lungs. A couple of kids laugh a little bit. I don't know where that's coming from but it definitely is a way to get our attention immediately.
love can sometimes be written in the stars,” the teacher tells
us, “My name is Peter and I'll be teaching you guys how to read
the stars this semester. Astrology is one of the oldest sciences. I
look forward to experiencing new and amazing things with each of
He stops at that moment. He's interrupted. The door to the classroom opens and someone walks in. I turn at that moment and realize who it is that has walked in. It's Jax. He looks a little more flustered than usual. I'm surprised he's in the class with me. I can see a couple of the girls in the class immediately giggling and whispering among themselves. I can tell I'm not the only one who has a crush on Jax clearly.
“Sorry,” Jax says after walking in late.
“No problem son. Find a seat.”
Jax looks around the room. I look at the seat next to me. Shit. It's open. It's fucking open! I don't know why I'm excited all of a sudden. I don't know why I close my eyes like a little school girl and pray a little bit until Jax finds his way across the room and sits next to me. He doesn't say anything when he sits next to me. He just slouches in his chair a little bit. I take in his essence in silence. He smells so fucking good. It's amazing actually. Who just walks around smelling this good all the fucking time? Why the fuck was this guy so perfect.
Peter walks over to
the table that Jax and I are sitting at, “LOVE! Love is just
one of the things that can be studied using astrology. You see this
is a study based on the premise that there is a relationship between
astronomical phenomena and the events in the human world. What is
your name son...”
Peter steps right in front of Jax.
Jax isn't paying attention, “Me?”
“Yes son. I'm looking right at you.”
“I don't know. I don't really follow all that shit. I mean stuff...”
“When's your birthday?”
“It's October 16th,” he responds.
“You're a Libra,” Peter says, “You may want to right that down. You're going to need it if you plan on getting a good grade in this class, son. Moving forward your sun sign is going to define you. What about you ...what's your son?”
Peter is looking right at me.
Aquarius. February 14th.
I'm such a nerd. I can't be all cool like Jax even if I tried. I can't fake like I don't love Astrology and know everything about it.
“Interesting,” Peter says.
“What is?” I ask.
“Two compatible signs just so happen to sit right next to each other. What are the chances of that?” Peter asks.
Jax sighs and rolls his eyes clearly annoyed with the class already. I'm not though. Our sun signs were compatible? I didn't know anything about Libras but right now I was definitely interested. I can't help but to look at Jax in the corner of my eyes. It's hard not to watch him. It's hard not to pretend like I'm so into him.
“Is that a good thing?” I ask the teacher.
“It's an amazing thing,” Peter says, “It's actually inspiring. Matter of fact I was going to pair you guys off randomly but instead why don't we do this. Why don't we base it off of fate? Whoever you chose to sit next to you is going to be your partner for the summer?”
“Partner for what?” Jax asks.
“A series of assignments we'll be doing. We'll be exploring the connection of astrology and human life. We'll be testing to see if there is actual any truth behind the stars as we float through the stars. Now...your first assignment get together and figure out a time to meet after class. You'll use books from the library...the old fashion way to learn about each others signs. I want a list of positive and negative traits for each of your signs.”
“What if we don't have a partner?” Dre asks.
I look over at Dre. Thankfully I moved or else I would have been stuck working with him for the rest of the year.
“Hm...how about you work with our Libra and Aquarius pair here,” Peter says.
Shit just went from awkward to straight up hostile.
The week goes fast after that. The Exodus is cruising through space and I'm kind of getting used to it. Mia Laperla is really full of herself. Every morning she wakes up the entire space station with her inspirational tips of the day on the loudspeaker. The loudspeakers just so happened to be in every room on the goddam space station. She'd follow up her tip with what she liked to call a journey. These journeys were basically her bragging about her life story and how amazing she was and how much she's accomplished in her life. She'd start off with something as petty as how she met her husband to how it was like to be pregnant with Pia to how she made her first million...as if she wasn't born a millionaire.
Kaysha, Jae Jae and I get closer. It's just natural. We're quickly really judging a friendship and keeping each other sane. Jae Jae is a useful ass person to have around to say the least. He literally has all the old snacks from back on Earth that I miss. He's making money on the side as well. I don't know who he's paying in the storage department but it seems like he definitely has connections down there. Kaysha is slowly becoming my favorite person in the world. Her obsession with the Dollhouse is slowly becoming my obsession as well. I mean I want to know everything about Jax and she knows everything about all of them.
Everyday I look forward to Astrology class just so I can sit next to Jax again. We rarely talk about anything at all. The only thing that we really managed to do was decide to meet up on Saturday in his room with Dre to start our assignment of the week. I'm not looking forward to it at all. A part of me just wished it would just be me and Jax...but Dre was coming.
By the time the day comes I put on my best looking outfit. My best looking outfit is of course relevant. I'm not wearing any brand name designers like Jax and his friends wear. When I show up to his dorm I knock and smile with books in my hands.
in,” Jax states, “Damn Libra...give me your name one more
time. I promise I'm going to remember it this time.”
“Mario,” I remind him.
Mario. Luigi...Mario. Luigi---Mario,” he starts saying at
that moment in this weird repetitive way.
“Um do you do that a lot?” I ask him.
Jax smiles at me showing off his perfect white teeth, “Sorry just brain exercizes I do sometimes to remember. I won't forget it. You look like Super mario a little bit. A black version. At least your little mustache thing you got going on does.”
He looks at it and laughs a little. I'm super embarrassed. I need to shave. I probably look a mess to him.
“Is Dre here
“Naw...he's not. Sit down though. I promise I made sure my roommate Greg is out. So you don't have to worry about any rude behavior like last time. I promise.”
“Good. I was kind of scared. Thought he didn't like me.”
“He treats everyone like that,” Jax assures me as if that should make me feel better, “You want anything to eat...anything to drink?”
“No...no... I'm good.”
I make my way over to his furniture in the main room. This room blows my mind every time I walk in. There is not a single hair out of place anywhere around here. When he goes to the fridge and pulls out a drink for himself comes back and sits it on a coaster I realize just how clean Jax is. He is almost spotless. Who is that goddam spotless?
Jax comes over and sits on the couch next to me. He's kind of close. He smiles.
“So tell me about you,” Jax says.
“Well I'm a
libra. Born February 14th...Valentine's baby.”
“No...not any of the astrology shit,” Jax responds, “We'll have time for that when the other guy comes. I just want to know about you...you know?”
I sigh a little bit, “I'm pretty basic. I mean I know so much about you and your singing career. A friend of mine is a big fan of yours. I just don't really have anything that interesting about me. I'm a lame.”
Jax smiles at me. Fuck he's handsome.
He leans over a little, “I don't mind lames.”
“Oh...oh ok,” I respond.
“I mean not that I'm agreeing with you that you're a lame or anything,” Jax corrects himself almost immediately, “You seem...cool or whatever. Every time I see you though you just seem so nervous. Stressed out or something.”
It was hard not to be stressed out around a guy like Jax. Here I was putting on my very best outfit and Jax was probably dressing his normal way and he still killed me. I mean he had on these jeans that looked like they cost hundreds of dollars. They hug his body and look custom made. His shoes I swear I saw Kanye West wear before. He has on a plain shirt that hugs his muscles. Those muscles of his are amazing. I could only imagine how he looked like without a shirt.
“I don't know. I guess I'm just a nervous person.”
“Here. I used to have my personal masseus. He taught me some tricks.”
“Wait...wait you don't have to...”
All of a sudden Jax spins me over and begins digging his fingers into my back. Immediately my dick springs up. Luckily I'm facing away from him and he can't see it. His fingers are so strong as they pile through my body.
“You're so tense,” he whispers in my ear.
I was getting tenser. Having Jax behind me with his always fresh smell breath in my ear was more than I can handle. I find myself getting so aroused by this sexy guy. I'm so hard that my dick hurts pressed up against the lining of my underwear.
“Oh my god...that...feels...so fucking...good,” I'm saying at that moment.
I can't believe I'm moaning. My body completely gives over. I'm closing my hands and feeling his fingers run up the side of my spine. He's so strong and so firm. He's sitting so close to me. I can still smell his breath. Mints. It always smells like mints. It never fails.
He stops at that
moment and he's laughing, “You sound like you're having an
orgasm or something...”
“Sorry it's just...”
“No. That's a good thing. Here turn around let me crack your neck.”
“No it's cool. It's...”
It's too late is what it is! Jax turns me around before I get the chance to cool down. My dick print is like a statue in my pants at that moment. Jax looks down and it's clear he realizes it! Ok. I can die now. I can bury throw myself into space. Jax is staring dead at my boner at that moment and it's clear he's shocked by it.
There's nothing that I can say. This isn't me getting a little bit of wood. I'm fully erect. I'm wearing khaki pants and there is a wet spot on my dick that is full of precum. Jax is not amused. He doesn't laugh about it. He just looks at me as though he's not sure how to react. He's not sure what to say. Shit has just gotten so fucking awkward.
There is a knock on the front door. I want to fix this awkward shit with Jax but he gets up before I get the chance. He gives me a weird look like he's confuse and a little freaked out. He heads to the door and opens it. Within a matter of seconds Dre walks into the room.
going?” Dre says to Jax, “I'm Andre. My friends call me
Dre. Not that I really have any but...”
“You look so
familiar,” Jax says, “Do I know you?”
Jax doesn't remember Dre. He doesn't remember that Dre is the guy who stole my ticket.
Jax probably meets people all the time. I can tell why he doesn't care much about little people like us.
Jax isn't focused. He weakly shakes Dre's hand and let's him in. Jax clearly looks a little uncomfortable and awkward after seeing me have a hard dick in front of him. When the two boys walk in I find myself quickly grabbing one of Jax's pillows to hide my boner.
Dre attempts to smile at me when he walks into the room but I look away. It's so awkward when he sits in the seat next to me. Jax sits away from me probably on purpose. It's probable that I've completely freaked him out. Jax just looks so fucking uncomfortable.
I want to leave so bad.
“I hope you guys don't mind but I went ahead and just did the assignment. I had some spare time,” Dre explains.
Jax nods, “Hey...I'm
down for that.”
“Actually that wasn't the assignment. We were supposed to do this as a group,” I respond at that moment giving Dre the nastiest stare I can.
“I was just trying to help you out,” Dre explains.
I shake my head at
that moment, “I have real friends to help me out. With
associates I'm not looking for any favors.”
If things weren't awkward enough between Jax and I...Dre walking into the room made everything a million times worse.
about we go over what I have and if you want to make any changes
that's great,” Dre explains, “Is that ok with you?”
Dre gives me a hard look.
Dre rolls his eyes, “Jax. According to my research libras are diplomatic, just, charming and overall romantics. Are all those things right?”
Jax sighs a little bit, “I'm not that big on romance man. Honestly...”
“Well maybe you just haven't met the right one yet?” Dre suggests.
“He says you're wrong. You're wrong,” I respond to Dre.
I know I'm being a dickhead but I can't help it. Dre is getting on my last fucking nerves doing this assignment. He's trying to kiss my ass and get on my good side. It isn't that easy. I wasn't going to make it that easy at least.
Jax sighs a little
bit, “Well I don't know. I may be romantic. I do believe in
soul mates and all that. I just haven't met that girl yet so I can't
you dating Pia Laperla?”
“Just broke up with my girl actually,” he responds, “And she's more concerned with how we are going to go public with our break up then the fact that I actually broke up with her. Can you believe she is trying to blackmail me into not telling anyone that we broke up.”
I'm shocked that Jax is telling us all his personal business. He just lets it pour out at that moment. He just looks beyond upset. As he lets it all out I kind of feel bad for him. I find myself struggling to not act like I'm happy he's not dating that bitch any longer though.
“Blackmail you?” Dre asks.
“It's because of Pia I'm on this fuckin' space station to begin with. I've spent a lot of time with her. She knows some...things about me. Let's just say she's not afraid to use those things to hurt me if I don't do what she wants. She's a spiteful bitch...which is exactly why I wanted to break up with her in the first place.”
“Damn man...relationships are hard,” Dre responds at that moment, “Are you sure it's over? You know sometimes people make mistakes in relationships.”
“She's not the one,” Jax responds shaking his head.
“If you really
cared about her don't you think you should give her a second chance?”
Dre asks at that moment, “Everyone deserves a second
Dre looks over at me.
I see what the fuck he's doing.
“How about we stop getting in his business and do the assignment,” I respond.
Jax shakes his head, “I don't mind you guys in my business. Honestly we are going to be working together for a while, we might as well all get to know one another.”
Fine. Dre wanted to play this game, let's play this game.
“Well I think you are doing the right thing by dumping her,” I respond to him, “My mother always told me that when someone shows you who they really are...believe them.”
“Damn...that's good advice,” Jax replies.
“No one's perfect,” Dre argues.
“No but sometimes the devil is a fucking liar. Who pretends to care and who pretends to love you. Who you spend years hoping that you can get more out of the relationship but they just string you along. And after years once the two of you get close enough to actually make something real spark...they betray you. The ultimate fucking betrayal.”
“Maybe the fact that they really cared is the reason that they betrayed you!” Dre responds at that moment raising his voice and getting a little upset, “Have you thought about that?”
“No I didn't because that's fuckin' bullshit.”
“You think everything is bullshit! You don't see that sometimes people make mistakes. Sometimes people change. I have no fucking reason to lie to you about that Mario. You don't know what my fucking intentions were for doing what I did.”
It is so heavy between Mario and I at that moment.
“Wait are we still talking about my ex girlfriend and I...or...do you guys know each other?” Jax asks at that moment.
He's confused. The room is so awkward. It's so heated.
I have to leave. I have to fucking leave.
I get up at that moment. Luckily by now my dick is back to being limp with all of this extra shit going on between Dre and I. Before I know it I find myself walking out of the room and slamming the door shut behind me. I can't take it. I can't take being around him.
I'm not shocked when Dre is running behind me. Before the elevator closes he jumps on the elevator with me. As soon as the door closes he stops the elevator.
the fuck are you doing?”
He grabs me. Dre takes my hand at that moment and he puts it up against his chest. He places my hand right on his heart.
“You feel that?” Dre asks.
“You miss it don't you. Because I miss yours.”
“You betrayed me, you fucking dickhead!” I respond,
you because...because I didn't want you to leave. Ok! There it is!
I was being selfish. I took your ticket because I wanted to burn it.
You got a ticket and you were going to leave me for 4 years. Four
fucking years. I couldn't have that...”
I'm shocked. I didn't even think about it. I just assumed that Dre had taken the ticket because he was trying to take my place.
are you saying?”
“What if I didn't want the ticket for myself?” Dre explains at that moment, “I took the ticket because I didn't want to lose you. Why do you think I was smuggled on this fucking space station?”
“Man...I'm in love with you...Mario. How can you not see that?”
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