The Atavist


            WARNING: If you are not of age/the mindset to read this story it is likely that some terrible curse will fall upon you (as there is a curse script secretly embedded and encoded into the text). So if you have a problem with The Gays, dudes, aliens and strange powers…also casual mentions of masturbation, then skedaddle kid.


Chapter Eight




            ‘You destroy everything you touch!’

            ‘You’re a freak!’

            ‘A monster!’

            ‘Alien! Abomination! Burn in Hell!’

            ‘You’re worthless! Useless! A tool! Nothing but a puppet! Can’t you see how they’re using you? How they’re all using you?!’

            ‘You’ll never amount to anything.’

            ‘You disgust me.’



            ‘I hate you.’




            Blake woke up in a cold sweat. Blood pounded in his temples. He hadn’t had nightmares like this in years. The winding cacophony of voices and taunts twisting down his spine, tightening, constricting.

            He quietly got off of Rob’s couch and went into the kitchen, his eyes immediately adjusting to the darkness.


            ::Do not mention it.::

            Blake poured a glass of cold water, trying to sort through the voices in his head. Half of them were imagined and he was pretty sure the other half were real, and they weren’t his or Khamon’s.

            ::As best as I can figure it, we are picking up the stray thoughts of other simbionts.::

            Wonderful. Blake thought, downing his drink. Any way to filter them out?

            ::Not that I can currently discern. Sorry.::

            Don’t worry about it. I’ll deal with it.

            ::We’ll deal with it.::

            Blake set the glass down. He hadn’t thought of it before, but he guessed Khamon was just as irritated by the voices.

            It had been a few days since the attack. Since Jared stormed out and Rob locked himself in his room. Blake suddenly wanted to be done with it all, to walk away. But he couldn’t.

            Making his way back into the living room he began to pace about. Frustration began to mount. His life had gone to shit—no school, no job, and no kendo practice. His friends had all but forsaken him and on top of it all was the whole simbiont business.

How am I supposed to deal with all of this?


Jared hadn’t come around at all, and Rob kept their conversations to a three word maximum.

I should go talk to Jared. I had no right to say those things.

::It was an honest observation and a valid fear.::

That doesn’t make it right.

::Doesn’t make it wrong.::

I should still go.

::Then go, but don’t lie about your motives.::

I’m not lying.

::You miss him.::

Of course.

::That’s why you want to see him.::


::You love him.::

Khamon, sometimes I wish there was a mute button for you.

::I do not understand.:: Blake knew from the smarmy tone that the simbiont understood fully.



::Get moving.::

It’s eight in the morning.

::You’ll be sure to catch him then.::

Blake grumbled, but he slid on pants and a shirt before stepping outside. It was a long walk to Jared’s dorm, so Blake took up a light sprint. After twenty minutes, he hadn’t broken a sweat.

::You can go faster if you want.::

Blake clenched his teeth and tore off as fast as he could. Trees and telephone poles whizzed by.

Holy shit!

Blake slowed up a little. Apparently he could run much faster than before. But then, it only made sense. He decided to move at half speed, which was at least as fast as a normal person putting some effort into it. He tried to make his face look strained, but gave up when he decided no one was watching anyway.

In forty minutes he had reached campus.

Record time.

::It was the first time.::

Still, record time.

It was easy enough to get into Jared’s dorm, and Blake had a key, but he knocked first.

‘Jared? You awake buddy?’

No answer. Blake slowly turned the handle. The door was open. He stepped inside and closed the door behind himself.

Jared wasn’t in the room. Not unusual. Sometimes the jock would party and crash at someone else’s place. Blake let his eyes roam over the small room. A few folded up papers on the edge of the dresser caught his eye.

The thought that he was snooping never entered his mind. Immediate curiosity filled the space between thoughts and before he knew what he was doing he was sorting through Jared’s personal stuff. He didn’t really read any of it, just flipped through it.

When he got to the middle, a picture fell to the floor. Blake reached for it and it flew into his hand before touching the ground.

Could get used to that.

::It is dangerous. We do not control it completely.::

Blake shoved the simbiont’s voice aside as he looked at the picture. It was of him and Jared, the first day of college. Both of them had been at frosh, their naked torsos stained with blue and red paint. Jared was lifting Blake off the ground and Blake was grinning like a madman.

The dark-haired man smiled softly. He didn’t know Jared had a picture of them together.

He felt it before he heard it--a tingling sensation pulsing up his spine. He spun around as the door opened, revealing the soccer player from the day before. Blake’s senses expanded in an instant, taking in everything.

The man was shorter than Blake and was more sculpted than built. His skin was tan and his hair dark with highlights from being in the sun. Blake would’ve guessed him to be Greek, or at least of Greek descent. Brown eyes met his and he knew there was something else.

The man had a simbiont.

Blake could feel the pounding of the other power running through the man’s form. It was infused with it. Saturated.

‘Fuck!’ The voice was deep and husky.


::I am on it.::

Blake barely got a shield up as the other simbiont propped and prodded. The shield wasn’t complete; he could feel it acting more like a filter than anything.

            ::WHO IS THIS?::

            Ease off! Blake gave a mental push. The man looked startled, and then smiled.

            ::Sorry.:: The apology was sincere enough, but Blake kept his guard up. ::It’s been a long time since I’ve spoken directly to another Kam-Tah.::

            Kam-Tah? Blake repeated. He got a mess of confusion from the other simbiont.

            ::You’re a newborn then? Gods! It’s been centuries since I’ve seen a newborn. I thought all the volunteers were past breeding prime.::

            I really have no idea what you’re talking about.

            ::Oh. How rude. I am called Clava.:: The voice was decidedly feminine, almost. Blake frowned in confusion.

            What’s his name?


            Your host.

            ::My--:: The words never came. The door slammed shut of its own accord (or rather Clava’s). Suddenly she swept over him again, scrutinizing every connection.

            ::You have a mutual bond!::

            Yeah, so I’ve heard. What the hell does it mean?

            ::It’s very rare.:: The man (?) sat on the edge of Jared’s bed. Blake raised an eyebrow.

            ‘So you don’t have a name?’ Blake asked.

            ‘What? No. well, yes. Caleb.’ The man stuck out his hand and Blake pumped it, glad for a little bit of familiar interaction.

            ‘The mind of this body is not in control at all. I have no interaction with it. I am what you see—Clava. Or Caleb to my human friends.’

            ‘You’re a girl.’ Blake blurted out. Caleb-Clava smiled.

            ‘On our home world, I am female.’

            ‘Why  guy’s body then?’

            ‘I fancy them. Besides, a body like this isn’t so far from the one I used to have. It’s practically a piece of art.’ Caleb shrugged.

            ‘So you…took over?’ Blake said, not sure he liked the idea.

            ‘You make it sound so wrong.’ Caleb frowned.

            ‘It is.’ Blake said.

            ‘Not all of us can mutually bond.’ Caleb tilted his head. ‘What is your “simbiont’s” name?’


            ::I see no harm in telling her.::

            Caleb nodded when Blake told him.

            ‘It is a famous name back home. Many name their spawn Khamon in remembrance of the hero of legend.’

            ‘Great.’ Blake said, another question coming to mind.

            ‘What Koda do you belong to?’ He wasn’t sure there was more than one, but this was a good way to find out.

            Caleb stiffened. ‘I owe allegiance to no Koda.’

            So there is more than one. Now to find out exactly what it is.

            ‘How many Kodas are there?’

            Caleb gave Blake an interesting look.

            ‘You were born rogue, weren’t you?’

            ‘I don’t know what that means.’ Blake said.

            ‘You aren’t bound to a Koda at all. At first I thought you might be part of Grau Baurom’s Koda, but you don’t know anything about anything do you?’

            ‘I know enough.’ Blake didn’t like how Caleb started to assume so much, and it didn’t help that he was right.

            ‘Sure, kid. I know what you need.’ Caleb said.

            ‘What’s that?’

            ‘A teacher.’

            ‘And I suppose you have an opening?’ Blake said. Suddenly Caleb became serious.

            ‘Look, not many Kam-Tah would offer what I just have. In certain circles it would mean automatic death with no trial. To teach a rogue…it is a forbidden thing. And you won’t survive without my help, Blake. Khamon. The world is vast—so much more than this little backwater planet. What I’m offering is greater than any University education you could ever get. These lessons are applicable to all aspects of life.’ Caleb said.

            ‘And what do you get?’ Blake asked.

            Caleb grinned. ‘I get your loyalty. Maybe down the road I’ll need a favor.’

            ‘We’ll think about it.’ Blake said. Caleb nodded.

            ‘Why are you here anyway?’ Blake asked.

            ‘Picking up stuff for Jared. He’s really pissed.’ Caleb said, stuffing some clothes into a bag. ‘You must’ve said something awesome. I’ve never seen him so…not Jared.’

            ‘He’s with you then?’ Blake asked. Caleb nodded.

            Good. That means he’s safe.

            ::Does it? He could be in great danger. We don’t know this Clava. We shouldn’t trust her so readily.::

            What can we do?

            Khamon was silent. There was nothing they could do for now. He hoped Jared would be safe.




            Blake sat on Rob’s couch. It had gotten to be far too comfortable to sleep on. And with Khamon he didn’t need to sleep as much or as often, so the extra time was spent thinking and thinking and thinking.

            Blake rubbed his temples. Who knew Jared’s beau would turn out to be a simbiont (a Kam-Tah?). The man was in deep now. And Blake would have to play his cards much more carefully now. What if Clava could read minds? He had no idea if simbiont could do that but at his current point in the game Blake didn’t want to assume anything.

            Suppose he were to follow Clava (Caleb?) and set Jared free?

            Idiotic, because Jared isn’t in trouble. He’s just pissed at you and…and…trying to make you jealous. Maybe.

            Blake sighed. Life was straining in the opposite direction. How was he supposed to ever hold a job or finish school? But he knew the answer deep in the back of his mind. He wouldn’t. He would never have an honest job, and he would never finish university.

            He would never do anything normal. At least that’ what it felt like.

            Suddenly Blake missed the way things were.

            ::It is a waste of time to dwell on the past.:: Khamon said. Blake wanted to punch him, but settled for a mental prod.

            ‘Blake?’ Rob’s voice. From upstairs.

            ‘Down here.’ He answered. Rob had been really skitterish ever since Blake cut his arm open and peeled the skin back to show his now alien anatomy. Maybe he had gone a bit too far.

            Rob moved down the stairs slowly, Blake could hear his footsteps.

            ‘I didn’t know if you’d be home.’ Rob said, not quite looking Blake full on in the face.

            Unease crept between them.

            ‘I can…leave if you want. I mean, find some other place.’ Blake said quietly.

            ‘No! No.’ rob ran a hand through his hair. ‘Ugh. You…you.’

            Blake tried to keep from tilting his head, a decidedly Khamon-like gesture.

            ‘I what?’ Blake said quietly as Rob sank into the chair across from him.

            ‘You screw me up inside.’ Rob said after a few seconds, his tone accusing.

            ‘Ugh…sorry.’ Blake said, looking to the floor.

            ‘No. I mean, God!’ Rob said. Blake looked at him through the corner of his eyes. Rob had showered not long ago and Blake could smell the scent of soap and freshly cleaned skin. He wore only a pair of blue trak pants. Leaning forward on his elbows, Blake thought Rob was one of the most beautiful things he had ever seen.

            Even his feet are beautiful. I didn’t know feet could be beautiful.

            Blake heard Khamon snicker. It was a good think the simbiont wasn’t much of a joker, or he would have fodder for a month or two contained within these few moments.

            ‘You scare me, Blake.’ Rob said.

            ‘I don’t mean to. It’s just—‘

            ‘No, I’m fine now.’ Rob heaved a sigh, ‘It just…freaked me out a bit, you know?’

            ‘I could kinda tell.’ Blake grinned and Rob gave a small smile.

            ‘I just wanted to tell you I’m…gonna be okay, with all of this.’ Rob said, still shaking his head in disbelief.

            The light from the street lamps lit Rob’s skin up like soft embers. Blake felt a familiar stirring.

            God. How long as it been…

            ::Technically, never.::


            He hated when Khamon did that. But it was true. Technically, never. He was still a virgin, unless a quick jack off session with your third cousin at the age of eleven counted. Somehow Blake knew it didn’t.

            But the feelings were there. They were always there, first Jared and now Rob. Both were so different, but so attractive. The sexual need was present, but so were inklings of deeper feelings. Blake had no idea at all how to proceed. That’s probably when it slipped past his lips, distracted.

            ‘You’re beautiful.’


            ‘What?’ Rob asked, looking up suddenly.

            ‘Uh, nothing. Just tired.’ Blake said, glancing at the clock.

            ‘Where’s Jared?’ Rob asked.

            ‘Pissed at me for some reason.’ Blake shrugged.

            ‘Really? I have trouble picturing Jared being pissed at you.’ Rob said. He was beginning to open up a little more.

            Blake shrugged. ‘I have no idea what I did.’


            Shut up.

            Great, I’m not even talking to the simbiont; I’m talking to myself in my head.

            Pay attention!

            Rob had leaned closer. Blake was barely paying attention again when the brown-haired man leaned in and pressed warm lips to his.

            Blake’s eyes opened wide. He felt Khamon “watching”. Rob was kissing him. Rob. Him. Kissing.

            Rob’s kissing me!

            ::I had noticed.:: The tone was casual, amused.

            What do I do?!

            ::Kiss back?::


            ::You expect me to know this?::

            You know everything else!

            ::Better do it now, he’s gonna pull away.::

            Blake nearly panicked, Khamon was right. Suddenly his arms were winding around the back of Rob’s neck. He opened his mouth and…kissed. Or at least he thought he did. He hadn’t really ever kissed before. Well, that wasn’t true. He had kissed, been kissed, but nothing as intimate as this. This was different. This was…


            Rob leaned in, hands roaming over the muscles of Blake’s back. Suddenly he pulled of, resting his forehead against Blake’s. The only sound in the house was heavy breathing.

            ‘God you’re hot.’ Rob said, tracing Blake’s jaw line. Blake fought to keep a whimper in.

            They stared at each other for a minute before Rob sank back into his chair.

            Wait, what?

            Rob rubbed his head, eyes downcast.

            ‘Sorry. I couldn’t help it. Sorry.’ He said, getting up. ‘I should get to bed. Um, see you in the morning.’

            ‘Yeah.’ Blake said, clearing his throat, ‘Yeah.’

            What just happened?

            ::I’m actually not certain.::


            ::We can deal with it in the morning. Have you thought about Clava’s offer?::

            A little.

            ::She could teach us a lot. Answer a lot of questions.::

            I don’t trust her.

            ::Good. I don’t either, but that doesn’t mean she doesn’t have things we want.::


            ::It would be best to hide our true identity, though. She could be a Koda spy. And not all of my kinda are familiar with atavists.::

            Can you make a filter, like before?

            ::I could construct some kind of semi-permenant metal barrier, yes.::

            That will work?

            ::Given the collection of our new abilities and the previous encounter I would say yes.::

            How long will it take?

            ::A few hours.::

            Go to it.

            ::What will you do?::

            I have to…Blake blushed as the images popped into his head.

            ::Interesting. May I watch?::

            It’s not like I haven’t done it before.

            ::I’m usually not awake that early.:: The advanced simbiont said, sounding like a teenager.

            I…don’t know.

            ::If it makes you uncomfortable, then I will refrain.::

            No…you can watch I guess. Blake said. Hell, if he shared a body with the thing he might as well get used to every aspect of his life.

            Blake stretched out on the couch and laid back, hoping Khamon could do two things at once much better than he could.