Date: Sun, 26 Oct 2008 00:35:53 EDT
From: Tommyhawk1@aol.com
Subject: Vampire Problem

			      VAMPIRE PROBLEM
			   By Tommyhawk1@AOL.COM
		      WWW.TOMMYHAWKSFANTASYWORLD.COM
			WWW.TOMMYHAWKSROGUEMOON.COM

Noah screwed up his courage and knocked at the big, old house. He had no
choice, his old, dilapidated Model T had taken out down the road a spell,
and this was the only house hereabouts. A big house usually had a
telephone, or at least could give him a ride into the nearest town so he
could find a cheap hotel for the night.

Still, this place looked semi-abandoned. No lights shone in the
windows. Did anyone even live in this place? Or were they simply
asleep. Nah! Hell, the sun had only gone down a half hour ago! They were
bound to be up.

The door opened. A tall, well-dressed man looked out at him. Something odd
about him, he was pale as a ghost! Or maybe that was a trick of the
moonlight. "Welcome!" the man said with a strange accent. Like he had a
marble stuck between the teeth and jowls on each side, with a hiss that
meant he couldn't close his mouth properly. "How may I be of service?"

Noah didn't know if this man was the butler or the owner. He took off his
straw hat and held it up against the bib of his overalls just the
same. "Pardon me, sir, but I was wondering if you had a telephone I could
use? My car broke down just down the road a mite, and I'd be powerful
grateful if you'd let me call someone to come and fetch me."

"Telephone? Telephone?" The man seemed to need to figure out what that
was. "No, I have no telephone. But you mustn't be left out alone in the
night like this. Come in and I will make you comfortable."

There were lights inside, if you counted a few miserly candles. It didn't
illuminate things any better than the moonlight. Helped you keep from
barking your shin on the furniture, but that was about it. "I appreciate
this, but really, sir, I wouldn't want to put you out none. If you have a
car and could give me a ride down to Tuckersville, I'll call my mother and
she can have my brother come and get me."

"No, no car." the man said. "I have no use for such...modern fripperies.
But please, come in and rest. You must be tired and needing your rest?"
There followed a sort of hiss that Noah almost looked around for a snake.

Noah turned and almost bumped the man's nose with his own, the guy was
right beside him. Noah made a quick step or two away. Now, with the light
hitting the man just right, Noah could see that he was all decked out in
fine evening wear. "You were about to go out. I'm sorry, sir, really, I'll
just go sleep in the car tonight and try to catch a ride into town
tomorrow. So sorry to have bothered you, sir."

"No, no bother." the man said. "I was about to go out to get a bite to eat,
but I think with you here I'd rather eat in."

"But you're all dressed up to go to a party." Noah remembered the time of
year. "And this is Halloween night, isn't it? You're going to a costume
party, and I'm here keeping you from going." Now he understood the evening
wear. "You're dressed up like one of those, what do they call them,
umpires? No, that's baseball."

"Vampires. Are you unfamiliar with the legend of the vampire, young man?"
His host sat down and so did Noah, it wouldn't be polite to stand and his
momma had taught him well on such points so he wouldn't embarrass the
family.

"No, sir, I can't say as I've ever paid attention to such things."

"Well, I can tell you that the vampire is a fascinating subject." the man
said. "You see...what is your name, young man? I am Count Von Strolholm."
The accent garbled that but that seemed to be what he said.

"I'm Noah, sir, Noah Jenkins." Noah said. "One of the Park County
Jenkins. There's a heap of us around these parts."

"Jenkins, yes." the man hissed, sounding pleased. "Such a large and healthy
family. Good Christian blood."

"Most of us, yes, sir." Noah started to add to that but the man said.

"I've had the acquaintance with some of your family in the past." the Count
said. "Such strong and healthy blood."

"Yes, sir." Noah said.

"But I was about to tell you about vampires, so you can appreciate them the
better. Vampires are creatures of the night, living but not living, dead
but not dead, caught in between the two worlds and so they are
immortal. They live by feasting on the blood of decent Christian men and
women. They don't have to drink every night, but every now and then,
especially at Halloween, they roam the night to find and feast upon
Christian blood. Such as the blood of your family."

"I reckon they would, on that account." Noah said. "But sir, if you are
going to your party, I could just maybe stretch out here on your couch and
let you go have your fun. I'm not into Halloween myself, sir, but no reason
you can't go have your party."

"I'd much rather stay here with you." the Count said. "Such a healthy and
interesting young man. But there is one other fact about the vampire that
you should know."

"They run from crosses." Noah affirmed. "Don't have one on me a'tall. No
reason to."

"Good for you." the Count approved. "But it isn't the cross that is the
true problem. No, the cross is worn by the most faithful Christians, not by
the ones who have set their faith aside. And the vampire needs to prime his
victims before he feeds."

"Prime them, sir?"

"Get the blood to pumping." The Count explained. "The best way for that is
for the vampire to seduce his victim. Fortunately for the vampire, he is
not only possessed of charms that are far greater than mere mortals, he is
also blessed with a very attractive face and body."

"Is that a fact?" Noah said.

"Don't you find my body attractive?" the Count asked.

"Well, sir, you seem a fine-looking man." Noah agreed. "Still, sir, I
wouldn't know about that so much."

"It is why the vampire favors females." the Count said. "But there are men
whom the vampire's charms can also sway. And the vampire can tell about
such things easily, living in the darkness as he does. For example, I could
wonder why you are driving so late at night, and far from your family and
home."

Noah shifted uncomfortably on the couch. "Well, I had me some business over
in Natchitoches, sir," he began.

"And I know of that business." the vampire said. "What was it, a bar in a
back alley, or a place in a park, where you met with with other men of
your...persuasion."

"No, sir." Noah found those eyes drilling into him. He found himself with a
sudden, irresistible compulsion to speak only the truth. "I got me a friend
in that town, sir, and him and me meet up every week or so."

"You and he are lovers." the Count affirmed.

"Yes, sir." Noah wondered that he answered so quickly. Those eyes...they
burned like twin flames! Driving into his very soul.

"So the charms of the vampire will work on you, same as on a pretty young
woman." the Count said, moving to his feet. Noah tried to stand as well,
but felt like his body was weighted down with cement bags! "You see, as I
said, the vampire needs to get the blood of his victim pumping. And what
better way for that," the Count dropped down again, not to sit, but to
kneel at Noah's feet, "than to make it pound in your veins from the joys of
the flesh?"

Noah couldn't move. "Oh, sir!" he moaned. "I appreciate this, really," he
said as the Count's hands went to his overalls, and found the buttons at
the fly, "but I did have my fun with my friend already and I don't think
it's, oh!" That last was when the thin, nimble fingers caught hold of his
organ. He had on boxers and a visit to the bushes not far from the old
house had caused the two openings of boxers and overalls to line up near
perfectly, it was simple for the Count to pull out his organ!

"Such a beautifully clean bit of manhood you have here." the Count
observed. "You've been circumcised, I see. What was it, an infection as a
child?"

"No, sir, it....ah!" The Count's lips were suckling on his organ. Noah had
had most of the day to recover from his weekend's dalliance with his lover
back in Nachitoches, and his cock screamed with the joy. This Count was no
awkward virgin as Noah and his lover had been when they'd found each other,
by mere chance, some years ago. They'd had to learn on each other, those
few times the two could manage to meet. And yet, the Count showed his
experience far beyond even the years of Noah and his lover, the Count was
wringing his prong's joy out of him like a tangible, mortal thing rather
than the raw sensations of his brain!

The Count sucked on him rapidly and just when Noah felt he was coming close
to his climax, the Count stopped. "Now we pause a moment." he said to his
panting young countrified guest. "You are now totally under my control. You
see, young Noah Jenkins, I am a vampire. I came to this country to escape
the wash of heresies going on in Europe. So many young men and women
turning away from their faith, turning to atheist or agnosticism. Such are
edible to me, for any Christian who has been baptized is food for me, but
they lack by their unbelief the essential flavor of a man such as yourself,
the one who believes in his faith but doesn't practice it fully. It is for
me the very milk and meat of my existence, and I knew here, in the southern
half of the United States, I could find such succulent young men and women
for my enjoyment, and so it has been.

Noah gasped and his breath came back to him somewhat, though his brain
screamed for more! "Sir, you don't want to do this." he panted. "You see,
sir, if you're a vampire, you need to know that I'm not what you....guh!"
The vampire Count returned to his feasting on Noah cock.

Noah wondered if he'd suddenly bite, suck out his blood right through his
cock-flesh. If so, now, he couldn't have managed to stop it. His world was
brighter than it had been in so very, very long. His furtive encounters
with his lover were bright, wonderful things...but this was the raw,
unadulterated lust of the forbidden desires. Noah had indeed turned his
back on his faith to pursue it...and now, here, he had it in it purest
form!

His brain climbed and scrambled for the heights. Would he be allowed to
reach orgam before the vampire fed on him? The vampire had claimed to want
to have Noah's blood pounding in his veins, well, that roar in his ears
wasn't a passing train! And the end of it was going to flatten him!

The vampire paused again. "One more short delay. By now your pleasure is
overtaking you. Even were I to stop, you would chase after me. Sometimes it
pleases me to make my victim beg for his own demise. But not you, not
tonight, for you came to my very front door and knocked and saved me a
night's hunting. On Halloween, I can hunt with impunity, but still, this is
such an accommodation to my hunger that I shall be merciful."

"What are you going to do?" Noah panted.

"First I will lift you up to the very gates of Heaven with bliss." the
Count said, and smiled, and now Noah could see the shining fangs, dripping
with saliva, in the red, too red, mouth. "And then I will bite your neck
and drink from your jugular while the blood still rushes through you. Your
death will be relatively quick and entirely painless. You will go from your
happiness to the darkness and your damnation in the Hell of your religion."

"But Mr. Vampire, uh, Count Vampire, sir, you really need to know that we
don't...Gah!" Would he never get out this one, essential sentence? Again,
the vampire sucked him down and now there was no stopping his climax. It
was hovering at the edge of his vulnerable soul, and when the reinforcement
of the vampire's suckling lips joined, it crashed in and overwhelmed him.

"AH, AH, HUH, AH, GUH, AH, HAH, GAH!" Noah howled as his body flung its
pearly jism up into the ruby-red mouth. Into that inhuman mouth it flew,
shrieking like so many bats in the cave, flying to their dark destiny. The
Count drunk from him and seemed to take energy and strength from Noah in
that wise, would that be enough to satisfy this being from beyond the
grave? He didn't know, he'd never paid attention to such things as vampires
before in school, had mocked them, in fact. He wished now he'd paid
attention! His brain tried to fight for an answer in this, his last moments
of life, but his climax overpowered such miserable ruminations.

"That was just the appetizer" the Count answered his unspoken question for
him. "But male jism cannot feed my essential hunger, it must be blood. Now,
having brought you the joy you have always craved, I shall send you to the
very gates of Hell!"

And Noah cringed as the vampire fell upon him, he was still weak from his
climax, his blood was still pounding in his veins, and the vampire pushed
his head aside and exposed his neck.

"Such a beautiful, supple white neck you have." the Count marveled. "And
now, to feed...." And he bit on Noah's neck, and Noah winced from the pain
of the two fangs as they pierced his skin and the blood flowed freely.

And the vampire back up, snarling in fear and loathing. "What have you
done?" he said to Noah. "Your blood is not drinkable. If I taste blood
other than clean Christian blood, I die!"

"Then I reckon you're going to die, Mr. Vampire, sir." Noah said. "I was
trying so hard to tell once I knowed you was a vampire. You said you came
here to find lots of young Christians. Well, yeah, Southerners are mostly
good church-going Christians, like Baptists and Methodists and such. But
you see, sir, your problem is that some of us...."

And that was when the Count yowled like a cat with its tail trod upon by a
rocking chair, and then he crumpled into so much old, old dust. Even the
clothes were now just gray dust. Looked like a pile his mother had swept up
from the floor.

Noah started to stuck a foot into the puddle of dust, but a sudden wind out
of nowhere blew it away into nothingness. "Yep, I tried to tell him, and
could'a saved him all of his misery."

He went back outside and started walking. It was Halloween night, but there
was nothing in it for him to be afeared of. He made it into Tuckersville as
the sun was coming up.

There was a pay phone at the gas station. Noah had seen it before on his
other trips, noted its location. Now a coin from his pocket and he could
make his call.

"Hello, Ma." Noah said. "Could you ask Levi to drive his Oldsmobile out
here to get me? I'm stuck on the road a few miles the other side of
Tuckersville." He listened and nodded. "Thanks, Ma. Oh, and Ma, one other
thing. I want you to plan something real special for us this Hanukkah. I
just found a good reason to be really happy to be half-Jewish on my
mother's side! I'll tell you all about it when I get home. I love you, too,
Ma! Bye!" And he walked back towards his car, whistling. Yes, sir, he was
one very happy faygala!

				  THE END

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