A Short Story Written By JD © 2014 Email - email@example.com
Chapter 1: That Morning and The New Kids!
Friday mornings were normally hectic for me due to the fact that my mom had the early shift at the Diner. Because of this, I ended up getting dragged out of bed early every week and made to get ready for school early, well before I normally had to get up for school. This of course is never easy for a child no matter how used to it he is and to be honest, I had been doing it now for quite some time... ...ever since my mom and dad had divorced and Dad had moved out, but that is another story. Anyway, after I got ready that morning for school (even though I didn't have to go yet), Mom drove me down to my babysitter's where I had to stay for the next hour before I could even leave to catch the morning school bus. If time and the noise level in the sitter's house would permit it, I would try my best to catch a nap on the ratty old couch that smelled of mold, cigarette smoke, and cat piss. I am sure if you were to try hard enough, you would be able to smell a few other smells on it as well, but that's something that I will go into later. As I was saying, Friday mornings are normally hectic but this particular Friday was one for the books...!
Maybe I should take a moment before I get into about what happen and tell you a little about myself. My full name is `Bartholomew Michael Jones' but most people just call me Barty. There are a few exceptions to this rule but they are redundant for this story. I am 10 years old but I turn 11 on January 23rd, which is only 3 months away. My parents divorced each other when I was 5 but that was due to the fact that my dad had been sleeping with another woman behind my mom's back. He even had identical twin boys with his mistress that are only 2 years younger than me. That means he hid this whole other family from us for over 2 years before my mom found out and divorced him. He is now married to her (Her name is June by the way) and is raising their twin 8 year old sons together. It almost seems he has completely forgotten about me as I rarely see him anymore. Even on his weekends which he barely keeps, he is hardly ever there. So for the most part these days, it is mostly me and Mom only. Anyway, to get back to what I was saying earlier as I don't want to get sidetracked... Did I say Hectic, what I really meant to say was that this particular Friday was one of the worst for me in the history of Fridays that I can remember right off the top of my head.
It was Friday, October, 31st, 2014 and it was of course Halloween. About the only thing that I can think of that would have been worse is if instead of happening on the 31st is if it had happened to all gone down on a Friday the 13th instead. Still, Halloween is a close second in my book! Anyway, being only 10 years old, I was looking forward to that evening. I was dressing up as a Pirate for Trick or Treating and Mom had already gotten my costume for me last week. I had even tried it on already and I thought I made a pretty good looking pirate and so did my mom. And before you say her opinion don't count, here is my response. I don't care if her opinion doesn't count, because it does to me and that is all that matters! I even tried to get my Dad to come by to see it but like usual, he was too busy and told me that he would see it on Friday afternoon when he picked me up for his weekend.
Now that right there was one reason that the morning started off that particular Friday on a wrong foot and made it one of the worst in a long time. Dad was supposed to pick me up this afternoon right after school got out and I was supposed to go back and spend the weekend with him and his family. Instead, when Mom woke me up that morning, she informed me that He had called late that last evening to let her know that he was once again going to be bailing on me, that something came up at the last minute. From the way Mom carried on, I knew she was just as upset about it as I was. Plus I knew she wanted some alone time this weekend and could use the free babysitting service Dad would provide by taking me off her hands. This way she wouldn't have to pay for a sitter when she did her weekend shifts at the Diner. Luckily the tips are good enough there that she can make enough for us to live in a decent enough apartment, in a reasonable part of town. Don't get me wrong, were are not living anywhere near fancy, but the place is neat and clean and unlike other areas of town, isn't rundown and is actually halfway decent.
"Hurry up Barty, why do you always have to take so long to get ready?" Mom complained as she tried to rush me. "Do I have to start getting you up earlier?"
This of course was the normal routine of threats my mom made every Friday when I didn't move as fast as she wanted me to. I could never understand why went through all of this nonsense as we never were late and in fact she was always early according to her and had in fact plenty of time to sit down to smoke a cigarette even... one of my mom's guilty pleasures, one I wish she would break the habit of!
"Mom, why can't Dad get me this weekend?" I once again asked in a whinny voice.
"Barty! Just stop! I am not going to keep repeating myself this early in the morning!" My mom answered back and I could tell by the raising of her voice that she was starting to get angry and I better not push it any further. "Your father is a self-centered jerk who only thinks of himself! My only guess is that he found something he would rather do more important than spending time with you, his son!"
I had done it now. I had pushed her into the area where she loved to do nothing but bitch talk about how bad of a father or for that matter... a person Dad was! Once Mom got going it was like she was the energizer bunny, she kept going and going and going! I knew from experience that she wouldn't stop until she dropped me off and she still might even start back up once she got to work if the right topic was brought up or question asked. Sure enough, she was still going on about Dad all the way to the sitter's house and when the Sitter opened the door, she started to talk to her about it as well.
Like normal, I headed toward the couch to take a nap before school started but what do I find... there on the couch in my normal spot was a boy about my age and on the other end was a girl who might have been slightly older but I couldn't really tell since I was really bad at telling girls ages. Both of them were fast asleep, which meant I now had nowhere to sleep other than the floor. I also wasn't very happy about the whole thing. I really hated this sitter to begin with as her place stank so badly and she wasn't the nicest person. She has spanked me on my bare butt numerous times which my own Mom has never done and even though I have told Mom about it she has informed me that she can't afford anyone else. There are other reasons I hated the sitter but some would call them being nitpicky. I just call them my personal views. Let's just leave it at, that she is not the best role model for a kid to be around!
Again, she is very cheap and only charges my mom $1 an hour to watch me which no one around here does, not even a teenager! Even they want no less than $4 an hour minimum, which my mom can't afford, not if we want to continue to live where we do. Mom has begged my dad to help out, to at least take me during the day after school more often, but truth is, June really doesn't want me around. I know I am not supposed to know this and she acts nice to me when I am there, but I overheard her and my dad one night when they thought I was asleep. Even though in the conversation they had, she never actually said she didn't want me there, I could tell by it that was what she wanted.
Anyway, I was in a really bad mood that early morning and I was forced to try and sleep on the floor, which had no padding and therefore was cold as heck and smelled even worse than the couch! Rest assured, I didn't get one wink of sleep before I had to leave for the bus that morning.
Chapter 2: School and a Halloween Prank!
All morning I had been mad and upset. It was in part due to the fact of how little sleep I had gotten. The rest was due to the fact that I was angry with my dad but since he wasn't there to take it out on, I took it out on the new kids that took the couch from me. More specifically, I took it out on the new boy Jimmy as he was in my class at school. His sister was a year older and therefore in the Junior High School, so I wasn't really even able to take it out on her. I didn't even take it out on him right away as I didn't know exactly what to do about it. Instead, I allowed my anger to stew and simmer all morning and it wasn't until after lunch that my answer came to me by an accidental revelation.
I had been on the playground and normally I would be with my friends but because of the mood I was in I decided to just steer clear of everyone in case I blew up on the wrong person. I knew I needed an outlet and soon and when I saw Jimmy get up from the swing where he was swinging all by himself and then suspiciously look around before making his way back towards the school, I knew something was up! I decided to covertly follow him and did so at a distance. A couple times he almost caught me but I was able to duck into an open classroom at the last minute.
I watched as he entered the Nurse's office and wondered why he was going there. As far as I could see, Jimmy looked perfectly fine to me. I stood there for a few minutes just hidden around the corner, in case he came right back out. I was sure he was trying to fake his way out of staying in school by telling the nurse he was sick. I knew this ploy was used often by the kids here and I myself had tried to use it and the Nurse had seen right through it. It was as if she had a sixth sense when it came to know when kids were lying about when they were sick.
5 minutes had to have gone by and still Jimmy had failed to come back out.
"Could the Nurse really believe this new kid's lies?' I questioned myself out loud to know one in particular.
No longer able to take it, I decided to crash the party and set the school nurse straight, who knew, maybe Jimmy had somehow Bamboozled her! I purposefully walked across the hall and into the nurse's office and when I found the outer office empty; I walked over to the door for the inner office and threw it open. The sight that I saw is one that I will never forget! There lying on the medical bed was Jimmy but wait... here is the funny part... He was lying on top of a diaper that the Nurse was trying to re-tape onto him at that moment. Next to Jimmy was a very used and stinky diaper, and when I say stinky, I could tell from where I was from just the smell of it that it was full of poop!
Jimmy of course saw me and his face turned red with embarrassment. My first reaction to everything before me was how funny it all was. I couldn't help but just laugh and boy did I laugh! As I was laughing my head off, Jimmy burst into tears and the school nurse became frustrated and upset with my sudden intrusion into the inner office. After trying to calm Jimmy down, she quickly ushered me out and warned me not to breathe a word of what I just saw. This of course was not going to be the case as the beginnings of a plan started to form in my little brain.
"I swear to you guys, he was wearing a diaper!" I once again stated to my friends during the last few minutes of lunch recess, as my frustration began to grow with them for not believing me. "I saw it with my own two eyes! I even saw the diaper the nurse took off of him!" I added.
"It is not that we don't believe you and all. It is just that... Well you know... You like to tell tall tales. Last week you told us all that you met the real Santa Clause last Christmas and we all know that he isn't real!" Greg, one of my friends laughed as he shouted this out.
I didn't even flinch as he said this because I knew the truth and I didn't care if he didn't believe in Santa or not. I still believed because I did meet him last year, but again, that is another story for a later time! All I cared about for now was that they believed me about Jimmy wearing diapers or not so that they would spread the rumor through the school and when it was the right time, we would then expose to everyone the truth.
"Look, if you don't believe me, go over there and pretend you are bumping into him and then pat his butt. The worst thing is you will prove me wrong!" I argued with them.
I could see them considering this option as they talked it over for a moment. All I could think while they did this was that finally I was going to show this kid that he wasn't going to be able to come into my life like he did and screw it up without some sort of payback! Especially when he hands it to me on a silver platter like this one! Anyway, I was about to the point where I was going to say fuck the plan and just walk over and pull the little snot nose brats pants down right there and then myself. It might not get the same initial shock and awe without the buildup, but still would in the end work just the same. In the end, I was glad I didn't have too.
"You know, I don't remember seeing him use the bathroom once yet all day!" Jeff pointed out as if he suddenly just remembered this fact.
"So what, who cares if he hasn't used the bathroom!" Billy argued back.
"Well if I recall correctly. You yourself used the bathroom 3 times today. I had to go a few times myself. In fact most of us here have gone more than once already today and he hasn't even been to the bathroom yet!" Replied Jeff.
I could see that what Jeff said seemed to have a bigger impact on the guys than what I said. Then again, Jeff wasn't known as the Boy who tells tall tales! That was all it took was one person like Jeff to make a statement like that before one after another the other guys all started to believe him.
A few minutes later I watched as my friends scattered among the other kids on the playground to tell as many of them the juicy gossip about the new boy and his dirty diaper change in the nurse's office. While all of this was going down, I looked towards Jimmy and when he looked up and saw me staring at him, I gave him a wicked knowing smile. I knew he could tell that I was up to something because he looked very worried suddenly and rightfully so!
I guess you could say he felt betrayed as well because he tried so hard that morning to be my friend when he woke up and met me for the first time. Of course I was angry and wanted nothing to do with him and refused to even talk to him. You would have thought he would have got the point but still the kid talked my ear off all the way to the bus stop and wouldn't leave me alone until I purposefully sat down with my friends at the back of the bus, where I made sure there was no extra room nearby for him to sit near me. Even then he didn't get the point but he got it now that is for sure! For the last few minutes of lunch recess I continued to stare at the boy whose name would soon be mud!
Everything went to as planned. It was meant as just a joke of course, at least that was what I meant it to be... Okay, a mean joke that really is not deserved by anyone as nice as Jimmy was. If I had known then what the consequences of my action would have brought about, I would have never done it, but we can't unfortunately go back and change things. Anyway, it was the end of the school day and we were all waiting to get on the school bus. The thing was many of the walking kids were still hanging around the school as well. They of course were waiting for me. Because I didn't have a lot of time I just did it with one quick jerk. On moment Jimmy was wearing his pants and the next he wasn't. As expected his diaper was fully exposed and what made it even better was the fact that he hadn't been to the nurse yet to be changed. I guess he must have decided to wait to be changed at home instead or either that he didn't realize he needed to be changed.
His diaper was so soaked that it was about to fall off his butt and I swear he pooped again as I could smell the distinct odor of boy shit emanating from his backside! Poor Jimmy was speechless and when he finally was able to say something, it was a rush of jumbled words that I barely could understand, something about me being a bad friend or a bad person in general, not sure which. He then pulled his pants back up and took off.
What happened next I will never forget nor will I forgive myself for! He was so upset that when he ran from us that he walked right out into the street and right in front of an oncoming delivery truck. Normally the people are supposed to watching out for us kids especially this time of the day but the delivery guy was paying more attention his cellphone then he was to the road. By the time he did notice him, it was too late! It was one of those accidents that if one party had done just one thing different, than the accident would have never happened, but of course I blame myself more than anyone else since I started the chain reaction that began it.
Of course the cops and the paramedics were called but since the bus was ready to go, I never got to find out right then what happened. For all I knew, I killed the kid and I would soon be getting arrested by the police for murder! It wouldn't be until later that evening until I learned poor Jimmy's fate!
Chapter 3: The Revelation
"What the world were you thinking?!" My mom screamed at me.
She had been yelling at me like this ever since I got home and ran to her arms crying my eyes out. At first she was trying to comfort me and shush me. I kept telling her though that I did something very bad, but I don't think Mom realized how bad it really was at first because she tried to tell me that to just calm down that she promise to make it all better.
You know, at first I actually believed that maybe she could make it better but then reality sunk in when I told her what happened. Boy did her demeanor change instantly. She went straight from loving caring Mom to angry yelling Mom!
"How would you like it if I went and told your friends your dirty little secret?!" She demanded questionably.
My face turned an ashen color as she said that and fear showed throughout it. Would my mom really expose to my friends my own night time problem? The next question of course would be; would my friends believe her? Of course the answer to that would be yes as she was not only an adult but my own Mom. I could try to tell the guys that she was just out to embarrass me and that I don't really do that but then I would have to explain why I never accepted sleepover request they offered so many times or why I always refused to allow people to sleepover at my place. Shoot, I haven't even allowed friends into my home yet, as I am afraid they might smell the remnants of the pee in my room. Instead I give them one excuse or another and so far I have been lucky that they have bought them. It also helps when you have a Mom who backs you up by letting my friends think I am telling them the truth, but if she were to suddenly change her mind and instead flip flop on this, the results could be disastrous to me!
Truth be known I haven't had as much of a problem lately as I use to as I now only wet once or twice a week compared to every night, and yes, I finally admitted to the fact that I wet the bed, so there you have it! My big secret! Now you may be asking yourself why someone like myself would ever done something like I done today and to be honest, I just don't know why I done it. All I can tell you is that I truly regretted it because for some reason in my little stupid pea brain, I never saw it going this bad. The truth is, I never really thought about it past the point of humiliating him. This was another reason Mom was so upset because she has done so much to help me cover up my problem so that it would not be exposed to the world but here I go and exposed another boy's problem without a second thought and in a very mean way. I hadn't yet told her what happened after I exposed Jimmy's diaper and when I finally did, I was caught off guard when she grabbed me and started to shake me while screaming at me. This brings us up to date now.
"Mom, I am sorry! Please don't tell my friends I wet the bed! I swear, I will do whatever you want me to do but please don't do that to me!" I cried out as tears started to well up in my eyes.
"Tell me, where in the world did I go wrong in my raising of you, to make you think that behavior like this was acceptable?!" She demanded as she gripped me harder and continued to shake me on every syllable.
"Momma, you're scaring me!" I bawled. "Please Momma!"
My mother looked down at me and I guess she realized what she was doing because she suddenly let go of me.
"Go to your room!" She demanded and that was all she said.
At that moment I was glad to just get out of the room. I ran all the way to my bedroom and closed my door before throwing myself into my bed, burying my face into my pillow. I then cried myself to sleep. I don't know if it was due to the mental and stressful exhaustion or the fact that I was still tired due to so little sleep today. Whatever it was, I slept hard for the next hour before my mom came in to wake me up. And as bad luck would have it to go along with this crappy day, I actually wet myself in that hour. That was one thing I had at least avoided that morning, in fact, the last time I had wet the bed had been three mornings ago. Of course Mom noticed right away and that didn't help matters with what happened earlier.
"Come on Baby, let's get you and the bed changed so that you won't have to sleep in a wet bed tonight." Mom said with a sigh.
"At least she didn't sound angry anymore; hopefully that was a good thing." I thought to myself but out loud I just nodded and agreed. "Okay Mom."
Once we were done getting my sheets changed, and I had a quick shower and got dressed into some clean clothes, Mom asked me to come and sit down with her at the table where she proceeded to tell me a secret of her own, one that she had been hiding from me that would completely change the confidence in myself.
"Barty, I haven't been completely honest with you. While your bedwetting has improved a little, it hasn't improved as much as I led you to believe." Mom said right out of the blue.
I didn't even know how to respond to this. Was she joking? How could she hide my own bedwetting from me? I mean, there is no way! I would know, right?! Of course my mom could see the perplexion in my face and tried her best to answer the questions I was having.
"You see Barty; I have been putting you in diapers after you fall asleep at night and then taking you out of them every morning before you get up."
"YOU WHAT!" I shouted.
I couldn't believe what I just heard, mom and I had the diaper conversation once before. I had flatly refused to ever wear a baby diaper! I wasn't Jimmy and I would never be caught dead wearing a baby article! This sudden revelation about the diaper made me realize I almost missed something.
"What about the times I did wet?" I asked her as I couldn't understand if I was wearing a diaper how I ended up wetting the bed anyway.
"Well, that is simple, I always took the diaper off an hour or two before you got up and so if you managed to stay dry for that time period, you thought you had a dry night and if you didn't, you thought you had one of your rare accidents." She replied.
"So, how often do I wet?" I whimpered.
"I am sorry Baby, but you still wet the bed nightly, I have even had to change you during the night on several occasions to keep you from leaking. I do have to say though, you have been doing better during naps as long as you remember to go potty before you lay down."
At this, I hung my head in shame as I realized she was right. Every time I did remember to use the bathroom before taking a short nap, my chances of staying dry greatly improve to almost zilch! When I don't remember to do it, it was almost a coin toss if I would wet the bed or not. This was one of the biggest reasons my mom always made me go to the bathroom before we went anywhere, just in case I fell asleep in the car. It was also why I was always made to go to the bathroom at the sitter's place before laying down. Anyway, I was too angry to think about going to the bathroom earlier; all I wanted to do was go to somewhere private and cry. I didn't even consider the fact that I might fall asleep and I am pretty sure that neither had Mom, otherwise she would have told me to go to the bathroom first like normal. Mom must have had a sixth sense because she seemed to know exactly what I was thinking about.
"Don't worry Barty; it is my fault. I told you to go to your room and you hopefully know well enough by now not to disobey me when I am angry. We were both way too upset at that moment to talk, which we still need to do. Right now I just wanted you to know the truth so you will fully understand why I am so disappointed in you and why the punishment I have devised for you is going to be so strict. I am sorry Barty, I know you may hate me for this but I need you to understand that what you did was not right and it may end up costing a little boy's life."
Now you would think with me being a kid an all, all I would have heard out of that was how bad I was going to be punished for what I did and be real upset about it. This was not the case. Instead, what I heard was these words `May end up costing a little boy's life.' And yes they didn't sound very pleasant but when you look at it from a different angle like I did, you can get a whole different meaning. Whereas most would see doom and gloom, I saw a glimmer of hope and since it was the only thing I had in this messed up day, I grabbed on to it.
"Momma, are you saying that Jimmy is still alive and that there is a possibility that he might live?" I asked full of hope but ready to have it crushed at a moment's notice.
"He is still alive." She said followed by a sigh. "Unfortunately it doesn't look good. According what I have been able to find out, which isn't much since I am not family, is that he is not doing very good and they don't expect him to live through the night."
When I heard my mom say this I about burst into tears as I again realized that I may be responsible for the death of a boy before the end of the day yet!
"Now Barty, while I am very disappointed in what you did and see how you had a role in its outcome, you have to remember that there were 2 other players in that role as well that could have done things differently as well. For instance, you know how many times I have yelled at you for not looking both direction before crossing the street, well this is why. As we know, Jimmy failed to do this and was hit. As far as I know, the family nor the police are blaming anyone but then again they may not know yet. That brings us back to the punishment."
Okay, this time I heard it and I was afraid of what might happen. I mean, here it was a Holiday and I was supposed to be going out Trick or Treating as a Pirate in just a few hours but now that may all change because that one word... Grounded!
I gulped before asking my next question.
"What kind of punishment?"
"Well, for starters, you can definitely say goodbye to all your privileges for the next month because that is how long you will be grounded for..."
"But mom why so long?" I interrupted her.
"Because I said so and don't interrupt me again!" She snapped at me before continuing where she left off as if I hadn't interrupted her in the first place. "Also those diapers I have been so gracious to put on and take off of you while you are asleep, they will now be put on you before you go to bed and taken off when you get up. You will stay in diapers until you stop wetting the bed. If you have a daytime accident, then you will be placed in diapers during the day until you can stay dry for a total of a 24 hr. period."
Of course I was going to get grounded but did it have to be so long. As for the diaper thing, I really didn't like it as it was really meant for babies and not for kids my age but I wasn't about to interrupt her again. What really confused me was this daytime accident stuff and the 24 hr. punishment crap, I just didn't understand it. Did that mean if I laid down and took a nap and wet the bed that it was considered a daytime accident? If so did that mean I would have to wear a diaper until I went 24 hrs. without wetting myself? What if I had to pee... or worse... poop! Also did my bedwetting count in that 24 hr. period? These were all questions I had because this new punishment was so damn confusing so far and my mom wasn't going to allow me to ask any questions.
"You will also be delivering a personal apology to Jimmy's family and if Jimmy miraculously pulls through, you will also give him a very deep personal apology as well. You will also at that time let him know of your own problem..."
Again I couldn't help myself as I blurted out and interrupted my mom.
"But Mom I can't do that! He will tell everyone else in the school and I won't have a friend left!"
"WHAT DID I TELL YOU ABOUT INTERUPTING ME?!" Mom suddenly shouted at me then in a calmer voice answered my question. "All I can say is that you should have thought about that before you did what you did. Besides, I don't think you will have to worry about your friends finding out from Jimmy."
The way that mom said this gave me a bad feeling but I tried my best to shake it off. She then got up from the table and I assumed our talk was done and that I was expected to go back to my room, instead what she said next only confused me more.
"Now let's go get your Halloween Costume ready then we will go and do your apology then you can do your trick or treating."
Chapter 4: A Very Sore Bottom Indeed!
We lived in Virginia and that year it was unseasonably warm for the end of October. It was 79 degrees outside and the expected low that evening was 65 degrees, which it wouldn't even hit until well past the time I went to bed. I had been wearing shorts all day because of how hot it was. Normally the school policy prohibits it but they tend to turn a blind eye when it gets warm like it was that day, as long as the shorts are in good taste and are long enough. Anyway, I told you this so that you wouldn't think my mother was a bad mom for what she did next, don't get me wrong, I thought she was horrible for doing it and I understood immediately why she was allowing me to go Trick or Treating. I even tried to back out of it and tell her I rather stay home but I was just informed that this was part of my punishment. You see, I thought I was going as a pirate as planned but my mom had another idea completely and unknown to me while I had slept, she had run out to the local Walmart and picked up a few things for my new costume while a teenage girl, Julie, who lives in one of the apartments upstairs, watched me.
"Okay let's get these clothes off." Mom announced once we made it back to my room and then proceeded to strip me.
This was something she really hadn't done in a long time... well okay, she hadn't done it while I was awake. Which reminds me, I must have really been out of it if she was able to pull my pajama bottom and underwear off and then diaper me without me ever knowing it and then put my pajama bottoms and underwear back on. Not to mention, coming back in the next morning and taking me out of the wet diaper, cleaning me up and once again putting me back into my pajama bottoms and underwear and never waking up once. She did say that there were a couple times I woke up and mumbled a few things then went right back to sleep, but I don't remember anything about those times. Anyway, I wasn't sure why she was stripping me but something about this didn't feel right so I instinctively fought her off.
"Barty don't make me get the paddle out and blister your butt!" She threatened me.
That got my attention right away and all the fight left my body instantly. Mom smiled at me and again started to undress me and I stood there helpless as each article of clothing was stripped away until I stood there in nothing but my birthday suit. Mom then picked me up and laid me down on my newly made bed.
"Okay Baby, you stay here for a moment and Momma is going to go and get some things for you."
"Can't I pleeeeeaaaasssse at least put on my pirate costume while you are getting whatever you have for me?" I begged, dragging out the please.
"I said wait here on your bed for me and that means wait here!" Mom answered sternly.
I did as I was told and waited for her and when she came back she had a huge Wal-Mart shopping bag filled with things. You know, one of those ones you normally get at Christmas time for the really big stuff! Anyway, it wasn't until she started to take the stuff out of it that I became mortified. The first thing wasn't so bad but each thing she removed got more and more confusing and progressively worse until the final thing that came out of the bag, which explained everything clearly or clear enough to make me one very nervous 10 year old! The first item was a stuffed teddy bear. The next thing was what looked like a t-shirt and sure enough, when Mom shook it open, I found myself gawking at the most disgustingly babyish t-shirt I had ever seen! It was something that I would not be caught dead wearing by my friends in a million years but from the way things were going I didn't think I was going to be given much of a choice. These 2 items were quickly followed by a pacifier that could be hung around your neck, a baby bottle, and last but not least... a new package of diapers, Pampers size 6!
It turned out that she had used the last one last night and had forgotten to pick more up and this whole incident had reminded her.
"Mom?" My voice wobbled a little in fear as I started to ask my question. "What is all of this for?"
Deep down some part of me knew the answer to my question already as it was obvious. Here I was, a naked kid lying on my bed with the only stuff to cloth me lying next to me consisting of diapers and a baby shirt! So yay, I knew what was about to happen! I just didn't want to believe it is all! What I really wanted to know was if I was going to be allowed to go out Trick or Treating, why isn't Mom helping me get into my pirate costume? I just had a really very bad feeling about all of this! And Of course I was about to get my answer, one which I did not want to hear!
"It's your costume silly!" Mom just simply stated.
That was all she said; don't get me wrong, she spoke but not with words, but instead with actions. For instance her smile alone told me a lot, let alone the fact that she was whistling some calming, soothing tune while opening up the diaper package. You know, the only thing that could make this scene even sappier and weirder, and to be honest I don't even know why I thought of it just now but anyway, it would be if a bunch of cartoon birds were to fly into my room suddenly and start to clean it up and this were to suddenly turn into some sort of warped Disney cartoon movie! I know... Weird!
Anyway I wasn't about to let her put me into a diaper and some babyish outfit, so I panicked and of course jumped up and tried to escape the room.
Now I may be fast, but right then my mom was much faster. Like a blur, her hands reached out and plucked my naked streaking body out of the air, as I tried to zig zag past her! And just like a like switch being flipped off, all the cutesy, lovey, attitude, evaporated instantly!
"Sorry Barty, but I told you weren't going to like your punishment but I never said I was going to let you get off easy. Now stop fighting this and get your butt up on that bed right now or I will get the paddle after all!" Mom warned me once again.
I barely heard her and to be honest I really didn't care at that moment. I was more afraid of what would happen to my reputation if Mom made me go out Trick or Treating like that and my friends saw me, then I was of her blistering my butt with the paddle. So I guess you can say I was quite surprised when Mom left and came back with the paddle. Of course when she had left the room I thought maybe I had won but her quick return proved me wrong and what she had in her hand shut me up.
She didn't even give me a chance to prove I could behave from that point. It was as if she had gone through all the trouble of getting it she was now going to use it no matter what. The paddle was actually an old ping pong paddle that my mom found very effective and it stung like hell with my jeans on! I sure wasn't looking forward to seeing what it would feel like with nothing at all on! Let's just say I wasn't stupid! I knew it was going to hurt like nothing I most likely ever felt before.
Mom than sat down on the bed before pointing at me and instructing me to lay over her lap.
"Barty, if you know what is best for you, you will get over here right this minute and lay over my lap with your butt up!"
I was too afraid not to do what she said so I quickly followed her directions knowing what was about to happen. I only hoped that by doing so she would go easier on me.
"Good, you are finally listening to me. Why couldn't have listen to me earlier to prevent this from happening?" She asked and of course I wanted to tell her that she didn't have to do it but kept my mouth shut. "Well since you did get up here without fighting me and without hesitation, I will only give you 5 swats, but you better start listening to me! Got it Barty!" As she asked this I just nodded my head in response and she seemed happy with this.
What followed was very painful and excruciating but was over very quickly.
"Are you ready to listen to me now?" Mom asked as she let me up off her lap and watched me rub my sore bruised rump.
After what just happened I wasn't about to argue, I just nodded my head yes as I continued to rub my sore butt with one hand and wipe the tears from my face with the other. All I knew was that I didn't think I would be able to sit for a week, from the way my butt felt.
"You know Barty, I had to talk myself out of giving you a spanking already, as I wanted to originally include one in your punishment." Mom murmured softly. "In fact, it was your father who talked me out of it, believe it or not!"
Actually, I found that hard to believe as my father is a strict disciplinarian and I am spanked by him on a regular basis when I stay with him at his place. Then again, I think that has a lot to do with his wife's jealousy problem! At least that is my theory on that as he never did it that much that I could remember before, but then again I was only 5 years old and my memory could be faulty.
"Are you ready to get your Costume on now?" Mom asked, suddenly changing gears and throwing me out of my thoughts.
"I really don't get a choice?" I squeaked.
Mom just glared at me as the words just fell out of my mouth onto the floor. Only thing that could have made it worse would been if she had started to stomp all over my invisible words that were just now lying there on the dirty floor, just waiting for someone to step on them! Anyway, I knew when I was beat and I knew this was definitely one of those times.
I got back on the bed and before I knew it, Mom had me in a clean crisp white Pampers size 6 diaper. I chose to just close my eyes and let Mom have her way as she dressed me in the rest of those clothes. Instead, I allowed my mind to escape as far away as it could, to a realm where I was a dashing pirate and not some little sniveling diapered baby! In this dream, for the moment, I was able to drown out all reality around me and all was good again in the world!
Chapter 5: The Hospital and the Apology
I tried my best to hide behind my mom but she refused to allow me this one luxury and kept pulling me forward.
"Barty, you need to stop that right now or I swear I will pull your diaper down right here in front of everyone and spank your bare bottom!" Mom shouted at me after having to pull me from behind her for the 2nd or 3rd time.
We were at the hospital, waiting at the nurses' station for the nurse to return to let us know if Jimmy's family would see us or not. The nurses' station was opened up to a waiting area, one which happened to not be empty at that moment. Several people in fact were sitting in it, obviously waiting to see family or friends of their own. At least this was what I figured. Anyway, at this point, I had no problem believing that she might just carry out this threat, considering what has happened already this evening!
"But Moooooooom! I don't want people to see me dressed like this!" I whined. "They will think I am a diaper wearing BABY!" And I put a lot of stress in the word baby.
"Barty, stop whining; they will not think that! They will just think that you are dressed up as a baby for Halloween... Who knows, they may even think your costume is more unique then some of the ones that children wear these days!" Mom stated after some thought. "Besides, as loud as you are, you are bringing more attention to yourself than your costume is." Mom stated matter-of-factly.
Looking back now, as much as I would hate to admit it, she was probably right. The thing was, I was a kid then and I didn't think like a logical adult but instead an illogical child! So it didn't matter what my mom stated because I wasn't going to see her point as long as it conflicted with my own, which was, I looked like a baby!
It was bad enough that I was being forced to wear all of this but too make matters worse; I was now being dragged out in public! I knew that this was part of my punishment as Mom had made that part abundantly clear. Still, that didn't stop me from feeling embarrassed about it.
When we left the house I really wanted to fight Mom so bad about it but the memory of the recent spanking was still very fresh in my memory and I didn't want to repeat it so when Mom took my hand and led me out of the apartment and down to the car, I just allowed her to do it. As for going to the hospital, I had totally forgotten all about going there somehow. With all the emotional stress I went through, I don't see how I was able to remember anything at all.
It wasn't until we even pulled into the hospital parking lot that I even remembered the stop at the hospital that my mom had told me we were making before we started to trick or treat.
I had hoped that we would just go in real quick then get right back out. Instead it turned out to be the biggest ordeal of my young life! First we had to go to the main desk just to figure out what floor that Jimmy and his family were even on. This turned out to be the 5th floor. Then when we tried to go to the floor the hospital had a problem with me going up with my mom as children visitors were normally not allowed on that floor unless authorized first. This led to an argument between my mom and eventually several nurses and a hospital administrative office worker before someone finally got me approval. The next problem we ran into was that we got confused and got off on the wrong floor, as there was a 5A and 5B and we got off on 5B when we wanted 5A. Don't ask me why they had an A and a B instead of another floor, as I don't really know. I do know that floor A opened the elevator on one side and floor B moved up a floor and opened the elevator on the other side. I have been told since that floor B is a half floor higher than floor A but still it seems to me that it is a floor higher so it should still be floor 6 and not B. Finally, we found the waiting area here and the Nurses' station and got a nurse to see if Jimmy's parents would see us or not. That was about 20 minutes ago and the nurse had failed yet to return.
"Mom, can't we just go and come back and do this another time?" I pleaded.
There was something else I hadn't yet told Mom as I was afraid of what her answer might be. I was starting to feel the need to poop and I had to pee desperately. The very absolute last thing I wanted to do; was actually use this diaper, especially in front of other people! At the rate of urgency that I was feeling, I only had a few more minutes before my bladder let go! As for my bowels, I was hoping I could somehow hold them still until I was finally allowed to use the toilet again. I haven't been quite honest... well actually let's just say I omitted something; you see, I have wet my pants a few times in the last year. I know, here I go again; the big hypocrite who almost killed a kid over a diaper and he himself can't keep his own pants dry. Most of my accidents happened on the way home from school because I either forgot to go before I got on the bus or didn't have enough time. There has been a couple times I peed my pants when I got too involved in one of my PS3 games, now that really upsets Mom when I do that because she can't understand how I can't tell that I have to go or why when I do pee myself, I don't pause the game and go clean myself up. Of course all I can tell her is that I don't know. I have tried to tell her that I just did it but then she feels the wetness and realizes that it is cold and knows instantly that I had been sitting in wet pants for quite some time. There was a time when I would even poop in my pants rather than get up and pause my video game but it had been quite a long time since I did that, at least a year and a half or so... I think, if I remember correctly. I have of course pooped them since, but those times were mostly due to diarrhea, which I have had accidents on a few occasion at school this year alone. Luckily none of my friends found out about those occasions as I would have never lived them down.
As the pressure in my bladder kept building I tried my best to squeeze my legs together and think of something else but this is hard to do as it only got worse as my bladder continued to fill. Finally with no other choice, I tried to get Mom's attention, as she had started up a conversation with another woman who was waiting in the waiting room for someone.
"Mom, I really, really, need to pee." I whispered just loud enough for her to hear as I didn't want the other lady to overhear me and further embarrass myself.
Mom just stared at me as if I grew a second head or something.
"Why are you telling me this?" She asked quizzically. "You have a diaper on; that is what a diaper is for, so use it!" She said with complete exasperation as if I should know this, like I wore diapers every day.
As I came to terms that I was about to piss myself at any moment and that I was going to do so in front of my mom and a bunch of strangers, I remember another one of my punishment details... If I had any daytime accidents whatsoever, I would then be forced to wear diapers until I went a full 24hrs without having any accidents whatsoever. I knew right away from what Mom said that it would be a Blue Moon before I had a dry night and therefore I would be stuck in diapers indefinitely!
I decided I needed to try once more.
"Mom." I said softly as I tugged on her coat to get her attention. As she looked down at me with a disapproving frown, I quickly blurted, "Mom please let me go to the bathroom. I really have to pee and I won't be able to hold it much longer and if I go in the diaper, you will punish me for having an accident and make me wear diapers until I go without having an accident for 24hrs which you know I can't do!" in one big rush.
"That's silly Baby! What made you think that?" Mom asked me and I just shrugged my shoulders. "When you are wearing a diaper for normal use or special times like this, you don't have to worry about the potty accident rule. To go potty in is what the diaper is meant for, Baby." Mom explained.
Boy other than the pressure in my bladder, that sure took a lot of presser off of me. At least now I didn't have to worry no longer about having to be stuck in diapers for days, possibly even weeks or even months, before I went a whole day (a 24 hour period) without an accident, not with my bedwetting history. My mom herself couldn't remember the last time I had been dry which is kind of crazy; that is how long it has been.
By the time the nurse returned a couple minutes later, my bladder muscles had started to fail and the warmth of my urine was now slowly filling my very exposed white diaper, turning it into a very not so white but now bloated, yellow tinge diaper!
For some reason, in my mind, I saw everyone standing and staring at me as my diaper expanded from my urine. In reality no one even noticed a thing as far as I know, if they did, no one said anything to me or my mom about it. Still, I was embarrassed and nothing could convince me otherwise at that moment. So I did the only logical thing my young unexperienced mind could come up with at that moment, I tried to get it over quicker by pushing; that was a mistake!
There, I was trying to just finish pushing the pee out of me when suddenly I farted and the next thing that happened, a long turd forced its way out between my butt cheeks and into the backside of my diaper. It was bad enough that I wet myself in front of a bunch of strangers but to poop myself and to smell like shit, well that was just unacceptable. And as I said, all of this happened as the nurse showed back up followed closely behind by a woman and a man whom I supposed were Jimmy's parents.
"This is Mr. and Mrs. Mills, Jimmy's parents." The nurse stated as she introduced us then went back behind her desk and retook her seat.
"Nurse Abbey tells us that you want to speak with us?" Mr. Mills, who I presumed must have been Jimmy's father, asked as he offered his hand to my mom and then to myself.
Mrs. Mills didn't move an inch from her husband's side. It was obvious she had been crying, and probably had been ever since she got the news this afternoon considering how red and puffy her eyes looked. Well... either that or she was some big crack head but I was betting more on the crying thing. Anyway, she didn't seem to be in the talking mood either so her husband ended up doing all the talking for the both of them for the moment.
"So what can we do for you Ma'am, as you can tell, we are pretty busy right this moment and need to get back to our son." He asked politely though I could also hear a rush to his tone as well.
My mother looked at Mr. Mills sadly and once again brought me forward in front of her again, this time holding me in place with her arms locked my chest.
"I am really sorry about bothering you and Mrs. Mills at this most inconvenient time. I promise that we will be as brief as possible but my son has something that I know that you will want to hear." My mom tried to explain.
This of course led me to explain exactly what had happened and by the time I had finished explaining everything, I finally got a response from Mrs. Mills and it wasn't one that I wanted to hear.
"Alvin, call the police! I want this hooligan arrested for attempted murder of my little boy!" She shouted suddenly at her husband.
When Mr. Mills didn't go for his cell phone fast enough or didn't act like he was going to have me arrested, Mrs. Mills started towards me as if she was going to hurt me and if it hadn't been for Mr. Mills and the Nurses quick thinking, I might not be alive now; then again, who knows. Nurse Abbey suddenly brought out a needle and stuck it into Mrs. Mills who suddenly slumped a second later as whatever medicine in the needle began to work its magic on her. A couple minutes later, two orderlies came and helped her back down the hall to I presumed her son's room.
"Sorry about that, she has been really stressing today ever since she heard our son might not live through the night." Mr. Mills explained and I could hear stress in his own voice as well.
Now this was not news I wanted to hear at all.
"Are you saying that Jimmy is going to die?" I asked with new formed tears in my eyes.
"I probably shouldn't tell you this but I don't believe in sugar coating things. The truth is, even if Jimmy were to somehow survive, his brain is so badly damaged that he is a vegetable. This means that he is brain dead and that machines are keeping his body alive. Because of this, we have decided to pull the plug anyway if he does manage to survive the night. The only reason I haven't pulled it yet is that I have agreed to wait until tomorrow so that all the family can come and say one last goodbye before we do it. It was my wife's one condition and I agreed to it."
Hearing all of this brought the reality of the situation to me and I just slumped into my mother's hands. If she hadn't been holding onto me so tightly, I might have fallen to the floor. I really had killed the kid and I didn't know if I could ever live with this knowledge. I almost felt like throwing my own-self in front of a moving vehicle as I deserved the same death that Jimmy was going through at that moment.
"Barty, I don't like what you did to my son and I hate the fact that you didn't think about the consequences before you did it and that my son is now going to die because of it. I also may deep down despise you a little since you lived and he won't. But I cannot say that I won't ever forgive you. As a minister (This was when I first found out that Jimmy's dad was even a minister. I would later join his church and be baptized by him.), I preach that we must always have forgiveness in our hearts, no matter what. As for Mrs. Mills, it will take time but she will come around eventually. I think the reason though that I am willing to forgive you mostly though is, that I can see in your eyes that your soul is hurting just as badly as ours is. I can tell that you will forever take this with you and learn from this experience." Mr. Mills said kindly to me and put his strong hand securely on my shoulder. "I will gladly accept your apology for both myself and my wife. As for Jimmy, I only suggest prayer at this point."
A few minutes later, we were headed back to our car and a night of trick or treating and Mr. Mills was on his way back to his wife and son. As for me, I had a lot on my mind right then. Up to that point, all I had been thinking about was myself and my own feelings and now I had a real wake-up call and found myself truly thinking about someone else other myself. Jimmy was technically dead already and according to his dad there was nothing that could be done. I had asked to see him but it turned out that I was not allowed to go back there unfortunately. As Mr. Mills said, this experience was going to change me forever and I couldn't help but wonder if it wasn't for the worse!
Chapter 6: The Halloween Baby
"We need to get you home and clean your stinky butt before we start Trick or Treating." Mom announced shortly after we got in the car.
To be honest, I had totally forgotten about the diaper let alone the condition it was in. This really perplexed me. How could I forget about something as embarrassing as the diaper I was wearing and the fact that not only was it very obvious that I wet it but it was also very noticeably pooped in as well.
Another thing that amazed me was that not one person mentioned the fact of my diaper or the condition of it while at the hospital and I thought that was quite unusual considering that I was 10 years old. Of course it was Halloween and up until I used the diaper, most would have thought it was just a costume but then when I used it, that should have made them realize it was the real thing but still no one said a thing, not even Mom. That is, not until now.
Something else amazed me as well and don't ask me to explain it because I really can't. At that moment, I really didn't care about the condition of my diaper one damn bit! It was almost as if that some part of me knew that I deserved to sit in that poopy and wet diaper for the rest of my life and here is the weirdest thing yet... Another part of me while very small; really was enjoying it!
Mom had just started the ignition when someone knocked on our car door window on my side. There standing next to the car in the beginning twilight, stood an elderly lady who was holding out my pacifier which after checking, I realized the string had somehow broken from my neck. Since Mom locks the windows, I wasn't able to roll my window down so I had to let her do it, which she did. There was something familiar about this lady but I assumed it was because I saw her somewhere inside the hospital.
"Ma'am, I saw this fall off your little boy as you left the hospital and wanted to make sure you got this back." The elderly woman said, slightly out of breath. "I noticed the broken string on the ground and wanted to give your son a special gift since it is Halloween and all." She added with a smile before pulling out of her pocket a beautiful chain with an ancient looking pendant on it.
"Wow! That looks cool!" I exclaimed as she handed me my Pacifier now on the new chain with the cool looking pendant.
"I am sorry Mrs. But I don't think..." Mom started to try and refuse the gift but I was happy when the old lady refused to accept no for an answer.
"Please understand that this is a gift with no strings attached. I won't accept no for an answer but I do want to let you both know that this is a special gift.
The Woman than looked at me and her eyes for some reason mesmerized me and got my full attention. What she said next would forever change the course of my life and ultimately make me the man that I became today. She offered me a way to not only make things right for the Mills but also make myself feel a little better about what I did. I know I will never be able to forget what I did but at least I can fix it for those who deserve it.
"Barty..." That is right; she knew my name which was kind of freaky too. "...this Talisman is a special one that grants its wearer 1 special wish. Now don't get me wrong, it can't do the impossible, like bring someone back to life or make someone who is not whole, whole again. It can do some amazing things though for stuff that hasn't been decided yet. For instance, your friend you went to see tonight whose fate hasn't been sealed yet, a wish could save him. Now here is the one thing you must know... Any wish you make comes with a price and only a good wish will be answered. Now you can make an offer for the price and see if it will be taken and if it is a fair offer, there is a good chance it will be accepted. Anyway, I will let you guys get back to Trick or Treating."
And just like that, the old woman walked off, leaving me with the cool pendant and a lot to think about. I really wasn't sure what I would wish quite yet but I knew that it needed to involve somehow saving Jimmy. The question was, did that mean that I would have to give my own life for his? If so, was I really willing to do that? I really felt bad for what I did but I still was only a kid and as a kid I wasn't really willing to die for someone... or was I?
"Mom, how did that woman know so much about me and what we were at the hospital for?" I asked her a few minutes later as we headed back towards our apartment.
"I don't know Baby." Mom admitted then for no reason whatsoever changed the subject. "How is your diaper over there, is it leaking?"
Not knowing for sure if it was or not, I decided to check. I first checked the front, then the back, and finally between my legs. Everything turned out to be nice and dry still and believe it or not, the diaper felt like it could hold a lot more. With this new knowledge, I wondered if I really needed to go through all the trouble of making Mom take me all the way back home to just change me. Besides I messed it, didn't I deserve to now be forced to wear it that way at least until Trick 0r Treating was over with.
"What the world was I thinking?" Was of course going through my mind but I wasn't taking anytime to listen to that voice as it was the voice that had me kill Jimmy and I was done with it!
"Mom, I really don't need to be changed right now. The diaper is still dry on the outside and it looks like it can hold a lot more than it is so far. If you want, we can just go Trick or Treating right now." I informed my mother.
"Are you sure that is what you want to do Baby?" She asked me and when I nodded my head I saw her smile which kind of confused me a little. "Okay, off we go."
The rest of the evening was actually better than I thought it would be. Before you ask, yes I did get some comments from some people about my diaper and outfit, and some of them were downright rude and mean. It made me consider poor Jimmy's feelings of how he must feel when someone like myself makes fun of him and his diaper and once again I felt an inch tall. For the most part though, people were kind and only had nice things to say about my outfit. Some even thought I was much younger than my 10 years of age and due to some lingering embarrassment, I decided not to correct them.
Over the next couple hours, I peed in that diaper a few more times and by the time we were done it was definitely leaking but even that didn't stop me from trick or treating at one last house. As pee was running down the inside of one of my legs, I rang the doorbell of my last house of the night. Up until then, I had been lucky to not run into anyone I knew from my school and most likely wouldn't since the neighborhood Mom took me to was not in our school district. Unbeknownst to me though, the house doorbell I just rang was my best friend, Kevin Janko's Uncle's house. And luck would have it that my best friend would be the one to open the door and find me standing there like I was.
Up until that moment, I was pretty sure of what I wanted to do but now I wasn't sure anymore. This one friend could literally ruin my entire life, if he wanted to that is.
"Ah Barty, what are you wearing there? I thought you said you were going as a pirate this year." Kevin asked, then his eyes focused in on the pee running down my leg. "Barty, do you know that you are peeing yourself?"
There was only one good thing about this, Kevin had not been at school today for some unknown reason, so he had no idea of what I had done, that is unless someone else had told him.
"Um, yes I know, I am wearing a diaper after all and that is what they are for!" I tried to say in a laughable mood.
"Okay, but you can't come inside then."
Afraid that he might tell other I made no move to enter the house which I never planned to and just held out my bag.
"Trick-or-Treat" I sang and after he put a couple a small candy bars into my bag I turned to leave but just before Kevin shut the door I turned back. "You won't tell anyone will you?"
Kevin gave me a dreaded look that could mean anything before finally answering me.
"You know I heard about what you did to the new kid and I didn't find it funny at all especially since you know that I still wet the bed at night and that I know you do too! When I heard about what you did, I was very upset and wanted to call you up and end our friendship right there and then and I even tried to but your mom stopped me." As he said this he looked up and past me towards my mom who was standing at the end of the sidewalk. "She told me how bad you felt and how you were going to apologize to the family, she even told me about your punishment."
"Hey, wait a minute! You made it sound like you didn't know about that and that you thought I was still going to be a pirate!" I interrupted, a little miffed that my friend lied to me.
"Sorry, I was just trying to play with your mind there and it was fun!" Kevin said with a smile. "Anyway, your mother talked me into giving you another chance and then we made arrangement for you to see me tonight."
"Wait, my mom planned for me to see you here tonight?!"
"Well Duh! Do you really think you came upon me by pure coincidence or are you that thick headed?" He teased.
By the time I left Kevin's, not only had I secured my friendship with him, I think it had even became strong and better. I found out that he was a pretty sensitive kid and never really liked it when people picked on other kids like when I did what I did to Jimmy that morning. I also found out that He was a diaper wearer and I didn't even know that. He had never told me because he was afraid of what I might say about it but now is finally happy that he can bravely admit that he wears diapers to bed to deal with his bedwetting problem that is a nightly occurrence in his life still. In fact until that day, I use to pick on him a little because I thought my bedwetting had greatly improved and his hadn't. Of course now I know better and that my bedwetting is no better and may be even worse than his.
Because of my bedwetting, Kevin is the only friend that has ever spent the night over at my place and vice versa. He was a great friend and would remain one until this day. Not very many people can say that about childhood friends.
With my diaper leaking as badly as it was, Mom decided to put down a special matt that she just happened to have in the car but it is my guess that she must have gotten it when she got the other stuff and left it in the car knowing she would need it later. Anyway, she had me sit on the matt on the way home to protect the seat from being damaged and once we were home she had me bring in the matt with me so that she could toss it into the laundry. She then took me by my hand and led me back to the bathroom where she proceeded to start some bathwater then started to strip me from my baby outfit.
Mom then carefully removed the diaper, using it to remove as much of the mess from me as possible then using diaper wipes which she pulled out of the closet and cleaned me up a so that I wouldn't be real messy before getting into the clean water. She then helped me into the water and told me to soak for a while.
A short time later, Mom returned and finished cleaning me up and then re-diapered me before telling me that I could watch a little TV before bedtime.
All through the rest of that evening, I tried to clear my mind the best I could to come up with the best way to word my wish so that it could be the most selfless and meaningful act. It wasn't until after I had gone to bed and Mom had tucked me in and had gone back out to the living room to watch another TV program. I decided to not only make it a wish but a prayer as well. So I got out of bed and got down on my hands and knees and prayed to God to help me with this one wish.
"GOD, if you are listening up there, please here my wish, my prayer. I really need an answer of yes on this one and I know it may be asking a lot, but I need it to be done right away as Jimmy doesn't have a lot of time." At this I grabbed hold of the pendant in my hand. "GOD or whoever is listening, I offer all my daytime control over my bladder and bowels and agree to wear diapers until whenever it is decided (if ever) that I am to be potty trained again. What I expect you to do in return is to fully heal all of Jimmy's injuries from the accident that happened today. I am not asking anything else other than for the damages that I am at fault for causing."
I don't know why, but suddenly I felt as if my wish had been answered and a weight had been lifted from my shoulders. I crawled back into bed and quickly fell to sleep and dreamt peacefully without a nightmare in sight. When the next morning came around, I can't explain it, but I could feel that my wish or maybe it was the prayer, whatever it was, had been answered.
Sure enough, later that morning I found out that Jimmy had not only survived the night but he woke up that morning and according to his parents, he asked for pancakes for breakfast. He would be in the hospital for several more days but he would make a full recovery.
Over the months and years that followed that incident, I got to know Jimmy a lot better and he became one of my best friends. I would like to say we are still great friends today but alas that is not the case as it is really hard to manage friendships over long distance. He and his wife moved to Tokyo a few years back and now I rarely ever see him and he refuses to get a computer so we can't communicate that way.
I still go to his father's church even though his dad no longer is the minister anymore, though occasionally he does get up and do special sermons at times. Jimmy's Mom has come a long way, in fact right after Jimmy's recovery, she called me up and apologized for her behavior and at the time I never thought of how strange it all was or how convenient everything seemed to be. Now though that I have grown into adulthood and have had time to reflect back onto it, I have to wonder what really happened back then. Actually it wasn't anything I hadn't thought about in years.
You see, right after Jimmy got better, just as I expected, my daytime control was lost and I was no longer able to control neither my bladder or bowels and had to be put into diapers full time. Because of this, Jimmy and I were a lot alike and in the beginning refused for several weeks to have anything to do with me. It took me a lot of patients but I eventually won him over as a friend.
Anyway, I went a couple years wearing diapers when Mom one day said she wanted to try and see if she could start to potty train me again. By that time I was really used to my diapers and didn't really want to give them up but at the same time I also didn't want to go through the rest of my school life being known as `Diaper Boy' as I heard some of the other boys snickered behind my back. So I allowed her to put me through training and soon found myself actually not only potty trained but also night trained as well and my diapers were put away, or at least Mom had thought they were. I had come across them about a year later and was amazed to find out that they still fit me as I hadn't grown much yet at 13. I snuck them back to my room and started to wear them secretly and that began my secret wearing of diapers. I replenished my stock by stealing from my friends supplies; that is until I was caught! Boy was Mom upset!
To this day the experience I went through has changed me and has made me more aware of thing. I also know now that I do like diapers, something that I would have never admitted to in a million years before and that was why I acted so badly to Jimmy. I now openly wear diapers around my home, of course I am not married but I like it that way because it lets me be the way I want to be.
Anyway, the reason why all of this came back to me is that recently my Mom passed away from Cancer and just before she did I came across some letters between her and someone else and normally I wouldn't read my mom's personal mail but with her in the hospital and dying and I was just trying to do anything to pass the time until I could go back and see her again, I decided to read them. I didn't really think it would hurt anything.
The letters were older than I first realized and the first one that I read was dated back some several years back and after looking at the date I realized I would have been around 12 at the time. I quickly scanned the letter and as I did so my mind started to explode and I picked up another letter and checked it out as well. Soon I had read them all and found that I needed some answers but I had to wait until visiting hours at the hospital before I could go and see my mom and ask her about the letters.
Trust me, I did not get a wink of sleep that night at all. I waited all night until the morning finally arrived and I was able to go and visit Mom in the hospital. When I did arrive, I showed her the letters and asked her about them.
"Mom, this woman in these letters seems to know a lot about me and my diaper issues and seems to be giving you advice on how to get me into diapers and how to keep me in diapers. There is even suggestion of hypnosis in it." I argued loudly.
"Son, I promise you that you are over thinking this way more than you need to." My mother stated and that was all she would say on the subject before taking the letters and tossing them into the trash.
A few days later, she passed away silently in her sleep. After that was momentous task of cleaning out her house (She had bought it after I entered Junior High School.) and getting it ready for sale. While doing this I came across my old junk box and inside I found my old pacifier that still hung around the old chain and cool looking medallion, but now looking through adults eyes, I could tell that maybe the medallion wasn't as old as I had first thought or was led to believe. I decided to take a digital picture of the Medallion and do a Google search for it and sure enough Google actually found it.
It was a coat of arms for the Brenner family and it was famously used in a medallion shaped pendant like the one I had by a Lisa Brenner who was a Child Psychiatrist who specialized in... wait for it... hypnosis. She used the Medallions as a way to reach her patients, to unlock their minds and open them up to the potential of hypnosis without them even realizing it. A memory came back to me than of when the old woman gave me the pendant and how I thought she looked familiar but I couldn't quite place where I might of saw her before. I was sure more than ever that I must have been a patient at one time or another and she must have hypnotized me and then wiped my mind clean of the whole event of ever happening. Her giving me the pendant was her way of triggering whatever hypnosis suggestion she had locked into me. This of course would explain my sudden lack of all bladder and bowel control, but it didn't answer how the miracle was answered and how that both the doctor and my mother could be so positive that it would happen. I mean, what would have they done if Jimmy had died? I kept looking to see if there was anything else in my mother's things that could reveal the answers but could find nothing but what I had already.
With this new information in my hands, I really needed to know the answer, so I decided to go to the only people who could give me that answer. I figured that the chances that Lisa Brenner was still alive was probably not good since she looked pretty old 20 years ago. I picked up the phone and called the Mills.
"Hi Mrs. Mills, It is Bart and I was wondering if you could tell me something? I am not really sure how to ask this other than to just come right out and ask it. It has something to do with my childhood and what happened to Jimmy and I know it is a hard subject for you to talk about, but it is something I need to know." I explained to her.
I am not sure if she knew where this was leading to if so she didn't act like it.
"I am not sure what you are babbling on about Bart but you and I both know that what happened with Jimmy was nothing less than a miracle from GOD. I suggest you leave it at that and accept it for what it is." She than changed the subject. "I am sorry to hear about your mom, me and Mr. Mills will be praying for you. You let us know when the funeral is and we will be there to, okay sweetie."
Her affection brought a smile to my lips as I said goodbye and hung up the phone and not anywhere closer to an answer. I guess Mrs. Mills was right, maybe I should just accept the true answer, GOD provided a miracle. Maybe it wasn't the one I had originally thought it was, maybe the miracle was actually meant for me. Who knows how I would have turned out if I had continued down the self-destructive path I had been going. My guess would be sitting in a prison somewhere but instead I now am a very successful writer on his 5th novel. Don't get me wrong, I am not on Stephen King's level but I do okay.
The main thing is that I still love to wear a diaper every so often and use it, unfortunately I have to change my own diapers these days but I have been changing my own diapers for a number of years now. Every so often I do meet up with another diaper lover and we change each other and do other stuff but like everything else... That is another story!