Simon's Journal

Volume IV

Thirteen Summer Days
A New Beginning

Written by Danny

Chapter 5



Have you ever been sleeping and had the sense that you were falling? Your entire body suddenly and violently jolts you awake, as your heart pounds at about a thousand beats per second. It has happened to me before, but never like what happened to me early this morning, where I had in actuality fallen out of bed. It was weird the way it happened; like I was awake, but not awake. I had been dreaming in detail about the sex thing, that took place between Lowell and I in his bedroom closet yesterday. However, right at the point where I started to reach a climax in my dream, everything changed from being this real thing between Lowell and I and started being something completely different and yet no less real. Like I said it was as though I was awake sleeping so I sort of had some control of the dream. I remember an odd pain, then I kicked at something, or someone and the next thing I knew I was falling.

I hit the floor hard; the pain bringing further from the edge of dreams and into reality. In my dazed and confused state of trying to wake up, I was suddenly struck with a feeling of being lost. I realized that I wasn't in my bed like I should have been. Another abbreviated moment and I had deduced that I was lying on the wooden floor beside my bed, curled into a ball while clutching at my pillow. I lifted my head and tried to look around, but everything was out of focus.

A voice, close, but somehow distant, "Simon please! I need you!"

Even in the blur of my vision I thought I saw... "No, couldn't be!" I mumbled with my dry morning voice.

There was a loud sound. I later learned it has been mom and dad's bedroom door knob slamming through the drywall as dad flung the door open. I blinked several times and rolled onto my back, my right elbow only missing my dresser by a fraction of an inch. As I lifted my head from the floor and looked in the direction of my bedroom door, I saw something... well I cannot say, `cause what I saw was impossible. I closed my eyes and shook my head.

I must have made some noise when I fell out of bed `cause dad came running into my room. Upon opening my eyes again I saw dad standing over me wearing nothing, but his white boxers.

"Are you alri..." he started to ask, but stopped in mid-sentence.

Unable to hold my thoughts together I asked him, "What happened?"

"What did you do to yourself?" he asked like I'd done something very wrong; like I was in big, big trouble.

Sounding like a four year old caught with his hand in the cookie jar I said, "I didn't do anything!"

Right then the door bell rang.

"Don't move!" he said pointing at me.

Seconds later Tom Segal came walking into my that isn't right, he didn't just walk, he was moving fast and had this really scary look about him.

At first he seemed to not notice me on the floor while his eyes scanned the room, as though he were looking for someone other than me. At the same time lights were shining in through the drawn curtains.

Still lying on my back, my feet nearest to the door and my head elevated off the floor, I bent my left arm so as to rise up on my elbow. As I was doing so, something under my bed caught my attention. I cannot tell you what it was, `cause I swear I don't know, but for a second... heck not even a second, I thought I saw a pair of ruby eyes looking at me from under my bed.

My entire body went on high alert. Someone screamed, I think it was me. I don't remember moving, I don't remember banging my knee on my desk chair; I do however remember knocking Tom out of the way in my effort to get out of my room.

Gun drawn and shouting for us to get back, Tom grabbed the corner of my mattress and with one hand he flung it from the frame as though it were nothing but a pillow. I was actually impressed by his awesome show of strength. However, there was nothing under my bed except for my skateboard.

"Tom?" I squeaked out, unable to hide my fear at having been scared so badly.

Dad and mom both came into my room as Tom, not saying anything, pushed past us all and headed back toward the living room. Dad raced after Tom while Mom grabbed my upper arm and pulled me to her.

"Are you alright?" she asked.

I stumbled over my own feet and fell into her arms. It was the first time I saw clearly both the plastic locking pants and the thick bambino diaper mom had put on me last night, had been torn open in the front. Actually they weren't just torn; they had been shredded in such a way that only an animal could have done it. Tattered bits of plastic remained in the front; the nylon coated wire was exposed, but still locked in place. There was a bright red line that encircled my waist, which told us that something or someone had been yanking and pulling to try to break the wire.

"Is that cat in here?" We heard Tom ask loudly from the living room.

Mom was dragging me down the hallway toward the living room.

"She's been gone since early yesterday." She said.

Standing and holding tightly to mom with my boyhood exposed, I went from shaken and a scared to full out terror when Tom's young partner, Agent Morris came in from the back of the house. I've no idea how he got there, but he scared the living crap out of me.

"We got it this time!" he said to Tom.

Again, not thinking, only reacting, I screamed, turned and punched without looking. My right fist made contact with Agent Morris's... uh... shall we say pride and joy? Amazingly, he hardly flinched at all.

"Oh shit, I am so sorry!" I said while covering my mouth with both hands.

Realizing I had just cussed, I looked up at mom who was both holding me out of protective love and holding me restrictively.

I looked to dad, then Tom and back to Agent Morris, who was looking at me with fire in his eyes.

He reached his hand inside his suit coat.

"Oh crap!" I mumbled, `cause I was positive he was going to pull out a gun and shoot me.

Instead he produced a small handheld electronic device and pressed a, button on it.

At first all we heard was a bit of silent static. Then there was a loud scratching sound followed by whispers that were too muffled to be understood by anyone other than me. I don't know how I knew, but I knew in that moment that the whispered voice was none other than Rico's.

"But how?" I thought, "Rico's dead!"

Tom took the recorder thing from him and sent him out the front door. Tom then turned to my parents and that same scary look filled his face again.

Tom covered his face with his hands and made a loud groaning sound.

"What is it Tom?" Dad asked.

"I don't know any other way to say this." He started to say.

"Just tell us." Mom insisted.

Tom looked at me for only a second before returning his gaze to my parents.

"I don't know what is going on here, but I am sure now that who or what got in here is not former Agent Fyer nor anyone we discussed earlier."

Tom looked at me again and then to mom, "Why don't you take him back to get him cleaned up."

I shook my head violently, "I'm not going back there!"

"Simon!" Tom said sharply to draw me out of my panicked state.

Almost pleading for him to make the fear I was feeling and the questions in my head go away, I nearly cried as I said, "Tom?"

"Go on boy." Was his reply.

Mom rescued me from my fears by saying, "I'll take him to the dinning room."

"That will be fine." Tom said.

"You wait in there. I'll be along in a minute. I just need to get your diaper bag." Mom said to me.

Mom headed toward my bedroom as I drug my feet across the carpet, unwilling to be anywhere in our house alone. Once she had joined me and without being told I got into position on the floor, while mom pulled the necessary things from my diaper bag.

Even with mom there, tending to my tattered diaper I felt desperately alone as the same question kept echoed around in my head, "How could that be Rico's voice?"

Mom's hand brushed my tummy and instinctively I drew my legs up, so that she could get to work, but she pushed my legs back down to unlock the now destroyed locking plastic pants. It was plain that she wanted to ask me how they got that way and I am so glad she heeded Tom's instruction not to talk about it. I started to rub at my eyes, but stopped when I realized my hands were clammy with pee and gritty with the micro beads that had been on the inside of my diaper. It was bad enough waking up cold and being so scared, I didn't need to add to my miserable state by getting salty pee or those granules in my eyes.

Free of the tattered remains of my night gear mom used several baby wipes to clean my diaper region, then applied some cream around the redness of my waist before continuing with the normal diapering procedures. The only thing spoken during the procedure was when mom commented, "Your rash is coming back."

Once changed we returned to the front of the house where we found Tom and dad standing toe to toe and talking in hushed whispers with strained expressions of exasperation.

Before they knew we were coming, I heard this much, "I don't know why he isn't telling us, but I am sure he knows more about all of this. I know we agreed to allow the boy the time he needed, but you need to know that I'm being pressured by my superiors and I'm not sure I can stall them much longer."

There was a millisecond pause before Tom added, "At any rate, I don't feel good about leaving the boy in this house. It is apparent something about this place is, either causing him to subconsciously do these things, or..." Tom's voice went hard, "We need to get him somewhere safe. Somewhere, where we have more control over his environment."

Dad then said, "and by we you mean you have more control over my son."

They stopped talking when mom and I entered the room. Scared and discussed with my situation I sat down on the sofa, with mom clutching me in a failed attempt to ease my fears and concerns.

In a trembling voice I said something to the effect, "Least my ankle band is still on this time."

To which Tom's left eyebrow rose high on his forehead.

Mom was smothering me with her octopus arms. I managed to free myself from her clingy embrace and got to my feet. Then Tom did something he hadn't done to me in a long time. He took a single step in my direction, knelt down and pulled me into a hug. I wish he hadn't done it, `cause it didn't feel good or calm my fears at all; it had quite the opposite effect on me.

Feeling my silent scream he relaxed his hold on me, but with one arm still around me he said, "I know I didn't believe you before, when you said you hadn't left the house. I'm sorry; I should have listened to you." He took a breath. "But I believe you now. I also believe, that what's been happening isn't of your doing. I don't know yet who is getting in here, but you can bet I am going to find out."

The whole time he was speaking a voice inside my head was screaming, "It is Rico! It is Rico!"

He looked over to mom and then dad as he continued, "It is obvious that I cannot protect Simon in this house. Whatever is going on here didn't seem to follow when he went to Lowell's yesterday. That leads me to think, that if we can get Simon to someplace else, he'll be safe."

"But I am supposed to go talk with Dr. Lizy this morning."

After yesterdays breakthrough I was honestly looking forward to seeing her this time.

"And Mary and me are going to the movies today too." I added. "We're supposed to double with BJ and Mary's cousin."

Dad spoke up, "You don't need to worry about any of that right now."

Tom, Mom and dad began talking like I wasn't in the room, so I reminded them I was there by speaking very loudly.

"Take me to..." I started to say, but wasn't able to make my mouth form the word. Instead I said, "Take me back to Fyer and Sister Sarafina."

For a second or two Tom's scary expression left as he smiled at me.

I wanted to ask, "What does that smile mean?", but I didn't have the guts to ask.

The next thought to cross my mind was, "God, why am I turning into such a coward?!"

With his arm still draped across my shoulders, he gave me a bit of a squeeze.

"I don't want anyone saying anything else. I know where to take him where he'll be safe. Sylvia can you please pack everything Simon will need for a few days," he paused and looked at me before saying, "and nights?"

Right then the phone wrung and we all jumped, Tom included.

"Alright, everyone just calm down!" Tom ordered, almost sounding angry.

Agent Morris returned while dad answered the phone. I took the opportunity to distance myself from Tom and went to the far end of the sofa to sit down.

Agent Morris was talking secretively with Tom and then vanished as fast as he had come. Dad hung up the phone and was frowning.

Mom read his face and asked, "What's the matter?"

"Jamie's in the hospital."

Both mom and I gasped in unison. I jumped to my feet in alarm and banged my shin on the coffee table. I fell back onto the sofa and heard a popping sound from inside it. I remembered how dad had broke it when he had forced me down on it yesterday.

"It's only a broken arm." Dad said to comfort our concerns.

I started to ask how he did it, but Tom stopped me by saying, "Can you help your mother get your things ready."

It is hard to describe how that question made me feel. The idea of going back to my room made me very cold inside.

I shook my head and must have conveyed the words I was unable to speak, `cause Tom's scared face softened.

"I promise you that there is nothing whatsoever back there that can harm you."

"Bull!" I said, which seemed to amuse Tom.

In the end I nodded despite my fears and the mountain of questions bouncing around inside my head.

He then added, "Please, don't either of you talk about anything and don't forget your electronic book thing."

He then took dad by the arm and led him to the kitchen.



A few minutes later Agent Morris reappeared in my room with just as much stealth as he had used earlier. I stopped what I was doing and stepped in front of him. He eyed me like a wolf might eye a rabbit it was about to devour.

I extended my right hand to him and said, "I am really sorry. I didn't mean..."

I didn't have to finish. Agent Morris didn't smile, but he did take my hand.

"Friends?" I asked.

He leaned down and put his mouth close to my ear so that only I could hear what he had to say. He squeezed my hand hard and said, "I don't want a diaper wearing baby for a friend."

He released my hand as he rose back up smiling.

OK, I've said it before and I'll say it again... I am a Christian now and I do try to live like one, but that guy was a jerk and I wasn't about to turn the other cheek. I balled up my fist, pulled back my arm and... and mom grabbed my elbow. Apparently she hadn't realized that she had just stopped me from punching that jerk in the jewels again. She had simply been trying to finish getting me and my things ready to go.

"What else do you want to take?" she asked.

When mom wasn't looking, Agent Morris stuck out his tongue and flipped me off before he picked up the bags mom had packed for me. On the way out the door I grabbed my backpack, which I had loaded with some of my own things like my e-journal, my bible and a few other odds and ends. And though I doubted I would get a chance to use it, I had strapped my skateboard to my backpack too.

Agent Morris took my bags from my room only to return a minute later. He had to wait, while mom helped me get dressed. The whole time mom had done really well about keeping herself calm, but having Agent Morris stand there looking all kinds of excited got to her and she began to cry while she tried to, button my pants.

Back out in the living room Dad announced, "Seems you get to see Dr. Lizy after all."

"Really? Awesome!" I exclaimed.

"You're a weird kid." Tom said and jovially messed up my hair, which wasn't a big deal on account of it having not yet been combed this morning.

"Your hair grows faster then anyone's I've ever seen." Tom commented as he plugged a single strand from my head.

"Ouch!" I complained and elbowed him in the hip.

Completely serious I reached out and took Tom's hand and asked, "I sure wish I knew what was going on."

I couldn't help it when my voice broke and my emotions showed through a little.

He must have thought I was talking about where he was planning on sending me `cause his response was, "I'll tell you later."

Frowning I said back, "You always say that Tom, but you never do! I just want to know why this is happening to me."

Realizing he had mistook my initial question he smiled and put a hand on my shoulder, "I promise you that I will find out. Now please don't talk about it anymore ok."



I was glad that I didn't have to go to Dr. Lizy's office in the yellow toy rental car this time. We were put into a black SUV and driven there by Agent Morris. He seemed more confident with the looming presents of Tom. He even responded politely when dad asked him to stop off at McDonalds so that we could eat.

Though mom and dad tried to convince him to join us, Agent Morris didn't come inside. He sat in the SUV and waited for us to come back out.

While we were sitting there, eating our breakfast sandwiches, I noticed that there was someone climbing around on the inside of the McDonalds play land. Boy was I surprised when out of one of the tube slides popped Jasper Hawkins. I knew him instantly; I mean, how could I not, with that glowing red hair and freckled face.

He didn't even look my way before disappearing into the Play Land again. I scanned the restaurant for any sign of another redhead, but didn't see a single one. I suppose, deep down inside, I had been hoping that Bull was there too. I looked back at the Play Land and realized that Jasper wasn't alone, he had a younger playmate. The younger boy had dark brown wavy hair and a round little face. Jasper has always been on the small side on account of being born with serious health problems, but still he looked too big to be playing with such a young looking kid. It didn't take a genius to realize, that both of the boys were clad in very thick diapers beneath their matching white shorts.

I glanced at Mom and dad who were talking amongst themselves and paying me absolutely no mind at all. I watched Jasper and his young friend play and longed to join them, but feared that Jasper might still be holding a grudge against me for having got his father thrown in jail and nearly got his brother killed.

Before I knew it, dad was asking me if I was ready to go.

"Yeah," I said and quickly stuffed what remained of my breakfast sandwich into my mouth before jumping up and hurrying to the door.

As we were climbing back into the SUV, I looked back at the Play Land once more and saw, that Jasper was at the very top, with his shoulders and head visible in the large clear dome-like-widow. What's more he was looking right at me.

"SIMON!" he shouted and waved, his voice muffed by the plastic dome.

My heart leapt as I waved back.

Excited that I'd seen and heard him, he waved with both hands as Agent Morris pushed me into the SUV.

"Easy!" I complained.



Unlike yesterday's visit to Dr. Lizy's office, today was turbulent, emotional and even painful. We weren't in session for more than ten minutes before she had me crying and recounting a childhood memory I thought I had buried away in the deepest, darkest parts of my thinker-organ.

"You seem quiet today."

I nodded.

"Something happened since yesterday."

I told her about the morning, but not everything. However, she knew I was holding something back.

"Who did you think was under the bed?"

I played with my shoe lace to stall for time to think.

Finally I said, "Can we talk about something else?"

"If you want."


"What are you thinking about right now?" Dr. Lizy asked me after allowing me to sit quietly, wallowing in the muck of my thoughts and fears.

I hesitated as I wondered whether to tell her about Lowell and what we had done together. Instead, I said something else.

"I had another one of those dreams."

She leaned forward and rested her arms on the desk, "Oh?"

Since we started seeing each other again, I've shared several very, very vivid dreams with Dr. Lizy. Each dream turned out to be my subconscious mind resurrecting a long forgot childhood memory. I hesitated again, fearful that what I was about to tell her, would turn out to be real as well. Sensing my apprehension she said the same thing she always says to get me to open up.

"You don't have to tell me anything you don't want to."

Without looking up I slumped deeply in the chair so, that when I crossed my arms over my chest, they obscured my face and eyes from Dr. Lizy's view.

"Can you tell me about the dream you were having last night?"

I moved my arms, shocked that she knew about that.

"How'd you know I dreamed last night?"

She looked at me like I had suddenly gone blurry, "You told me you did not two seconds ago."

"I did?"

She nodded and grimaced.

I slumped lower and crossed my arms back over my chest before starting.

"It was another one of those really detailed dreams." I said. "Like another sleeping memory."

She sat quietly, listening as I shared the entire dream so vividly, that it felt for me like I was living it all over again.

"Holy crap, Aunt Catharine," I shouted when she jumped out from behind her car and scared the life out of me. Actually I hadn't said crap, but the other more popular word.

She picked me up, turned me upside down and pretended to bounce my head on the concrete driveway, while at the same time tickling my belly, which had become exposed when my shirt fell over my face.

"What would your mother think if she heard you talking like that?"

"But you said..." I complained while laughing uncontrollably.

The last time I was visiting with Aunt Catharine, she had made up a new secret rule for when I come over; I can cuss all I want when we are in her house.

"Are we inside yet?" she doubled her efforts in tickling me, "Huh, are we? Are we not outside? Because it sure looks like the outside to me."

Laughing, screaming and squealing like a caught pig, I begged, "Stoooooop ppplllleeeeaaasssseeeee!"

"Who do you love?" she teased as her finger tips danced across my belly.

Tickled to a state of hysterics I screeched, "AUNT CATHARINE!"

"Tell me again!"

"Stooooooop! I'm going to pee!"

"Tell me!"


She flipped me around and dropped me on my feet, but I was so exhausted and my brain swimming with blood, that I dropped to the sidewalk while still giggling and trying to catch my breath.

"And I love you too!" she teased as she pulled my bag out of her car.

Regaining my composure and my breath, I rose to my feet, only to discover that I had a wet spot on the front of my khakis.

"AUNT CATHARINE!" I complained loudly.

She turned her head to see what I was shouting about now and was in time to see me trying to cover the evidence with my hands.

"Simon, you peed your britches! What did you do that for?"

"You made me!" I challenged angrily.

She laughed when she saw how upset I was about it.

"Don't cry! It is only a bit of pee. You're going to get a lot wetter than that when we go swimming tomorrow. Come on, let's go inside and you can get out of those."

"I'm not crying!" I blubbered and without hesitating for even a second, I took off for the door to her floor house.

As I was running away from her, Aunt Catharine said something to the effect, "I don't like the look of those clouds."

I should have been suspicious when the knob turned and the door opened. After all, Aunt Catharine hadn't actually been home for over a week.


"She was some kind of saleswoman or something." I said for Dr. Lizy's benefit.


Anyway, when the door opened, I ran inside and was halfway to the bathroom, before I realized that none of the house's contents looked at all familiar.

"What are you doing in my house?" someone shrieked.

I pivoted on my heel toward the direction of the hysterical woman. I recognized her instantly as the lady friend Aunt Catharine used to have over all the time when I was younger.

"What is her name?" I thought to myself.

They had a falling out when Aunt Catharine had caught her doing something that involved two guys.


I paused my recounting of the dream to say, "If Aunt Catharine didn't want to be friends with that lady, I'll never understand she let her live in part of her house, but then again I never understand anything Aunt Catharine does."


That lady was standing in front of the kitchen sink where she must have been washing dishes `cause she had a towel in one hand and a cup or mug in the other. However it was what she was wearing that had really caught my attention; she had on a pair of pink panties, a matching bra and nothing else.


Dr. Lizy rarely interrupted me when I was sharing like this, but this time the question must have been too strong for her to hold it until later.

"Was that the first time you ever saw a nearly naked lady?"

It was difficult to shrug in my slouched position, "I dunno."

I continued as though I hadn't been asked the question.


Her screams momentarily caused me to forget about my wet pants as I covered my eyes and tried to run back out of the house.

Aunt Catharine could be heard still outside calling, "Simon?"

I ran into something and had to take my hands off my eyes to see where I was going.

"GET OUT OF HERE!" the lady screeched and something smashed against the wall, near where I was standing.

I looked back in time to see a second ceramic object flying toward my head and had just enough time to duck out of the way of the mug before it shattered into lethal shards against the wall. She was reaching for a third object to throw, so I took the hint that it was time for me to leave.

I had the forethought to pull the door closed as I ran out, which turned out to be a great move on my part `cause a second later there was two more crashes against the door intermingled with incoherent screams.

Aunt Catharine was climbing the front stairs and was looking back at me with concern. I looked at her with wide eyes and shaking all over. There was another smash against the door and more screams from inside.

"Guess you figured out that I don't live down there anymore."


I stopped my story long enough to make an observation.

"I don't remember just how many times Aunt Catharine has switched from living in the upper and then the lower part of her duplex house. I suppose she gets tired of living in one part and will move back down or up to the other part every few years."

Dr. Lizy made a humming sound and I continued where I'd left off.


"She's barking mad!" I panted and gripped my frantically beating heart.

"You're more right then you know." Aunt Catharine said.

Hand shaking I tried to run my fingers through my hair, but stopped when I found a fragment of glass. I held it out for Aunt Catharine to see, "She tried to kill me!"

"Welcome to the club." she said as she guided me past her as we continued out assent to the upper unit.

This time there was no way I was going to try the door. Instead I stood anxiously, waited for Aunt Catharine to open it. She used a key which she had produced from a string around her neck.

"Why not keep it on your keychain?" I asked.

Her answer was so very like Aunt Catharine, "Because I don't."

She pushed me into the house and my jaw nearly fell on the floor.

"Don't stand there blocking the door, get your wet pants moving!" she said, giving me a knee to the backside to get me out of the way.

"Wow Aunt Catharine, this is awesome!"

"You like?"

"Me like very berry much!"

Aunt Catharine had apparently had a professional decorator come `cause it was... was... amazing. She also had walls moved and everything `cause it was so different.

"Where is all your stuff?" I asked as I gazed around the very modern styled pad.

I ran through the living room to the kitchen at the back of her place. Even the kitchen was different.

"It feels bigger!" I said to Aunt Catharine.

She dropped my things on one of the two matching recliners.

"It's the same size, but I had some things put in. I now have my own laundry room off the kitchen there." she pointed to a door to the left of the long galley kitchen. "So I don't have to go all the way to the basement to do my washing."

"Wow a metal stove and refrigerator." I exclaimed.

"That is called stainless steal." She told me.

She walked to the kitchen where I had my head stuck in the refrigerator checking it out.

"Speaking of laundry rooms, shouldn't we get you out of those wet pants?"

I looked down and to my horror, that small wet spot was now huge and extended down my right pant leg.

"Guess Hillary gave you a bit of a fright."


I paused my story again and pushed myself up in the chair as I exclaimed loudly to Dr. Lizy, "That was the ladies name, Hillary! I just now remembered."

I smiled proudly to myself for having remembered.


Dr. Lizy smiled and cleverly steered my thoughts back to the dream. "How did you feel about wetting your pants then?"

I looked inward and shrugged, "I wasn't as freaked out about wetting my pants, now that I was in the safety of Aunt Catharine's house."

I shrugged again.

"It wasn't the first time we had to deal with me in wet pants."

With that I continued...


Standing there in the kitchen I shook my head while examining the pee stain.

"Crazy bitch!" I spat, knowing that it was ok to say such a thing now that Aunt Catharine and I were inside.

I closed the refrigerator while she reached past me and opened the door to the laundry room, which wasn't much bigger than a walk-in closet. The door split in the middle and each half slid back into the wall on either side. Aunt Catharine called it a pocket door. I'd never seen one that split like that and had to try it for myself several times before she got tired of my playing.

"Alright you." she said, giving me a good-humored pull of my earlobe.

To the left of the door was a stacked washer and drier and to the right was...

"What is that and what are those?" I asked and pointed at the ceiling high wooden structure which was filled with row after row of bottles.

"It's called a wine rack and those are bottles of wine, genius."

"Oh," I said and tilted my head back so that I could see her, "Can I have some?"

"If you behave yourself I might let you have a taste later."

She pushed me all the way into the laundry room, grabbed my shoulders and spun me around. Despite being ten years old now, Aunt Catharine still insisted on helping whenever I stayed with her.


Dr. Lizy interrupted me by asking, "What do you mean by that?"


I shrugged again and made a mental note that I needed to stop shrugging so much.

"It was another one of Aunt Catharine's rules." I said, "Whenever I come to visit, she gets to do everything for me, like dressing or undressing me, bathing me, cooking for me, and stuff like that. She says it helps her feel better about not having kids of her own to take care of."


"Did your parent's know that your Aunt cared for you like that?"


I started to shrug, but stopped myself, "No." I said and then added, "It was supposed to be a secret just between us."

I don't know why I asked what I asked next `cause I already knew Dr. Lizy would never share anything I said to her.

"You won't tell, will you?"

Dr. Lizy smiled and reassured me that she wouldn't before once more steering me back to my dream.


Aunt Catharine knelt before me and began to pull on my shirt to get it untucked from my pants.

"Ah man, even my shirt got wet!" I moaned.

She grinned, but didn't look at me as she pulled my shirt up over my head and said, "Maybe I should talk to your mom about putting you back into diapers."

"AUNT CATHARINE NOOOO!" I shouted and laughed as my head came free from the confines of my shirt.

I knew she was only teasing me. Aunt Catharine is always teasing me about stuff like that, especially at times like this, when I have an accident.

While my arms were still up she took the opportunity to tickle my pits.

I giggled and wriggled then stuck my finger in her face and sternly said, "No more tickling!"

She tried to bite my finger.

"Ok no more tickling." she said while crossing her heart, but then she snuck with the other hand and poked my ribs.

"Aunt Catharine!" I giggled and whined.

"What? I like tickling my favorite nephew. So sue me!"

"Hey, I am your only nephew."

"True, but you're still my favorite."

She tossed my shirt into the washing machine and pulled me to her. Her arms wrapped around behind me and she hugged me while kissing my neck and rubbing my bare back.

"I missed you so much." she purred into my ear.

I wrapped my arms around her neck and snuggled my nose against her.


I paused in reflection.

"What are you thinking?" Dr. Lizy asked.

"Huh!" I grunted knowingly.

I knew Dr. Lizy doesn't like nonverbal grunting so I quickly followed that up with, "Back then Aunt Catharine always smelled so good."

Dr. Lizy scribbled something on her note pad. "Continue please."


I think I said something like, "I missed you too Aunt Catharine."

She then released me from her warm embrace and began working to undo the, button of my pants.

"Your pants are entirely too tight on you."

"No my pants are entirely just right on me. Besides, I like them tight."

"You do know what wearing tight pants will do to you, don't you?"

"What?" I asked with a measure of concern.

"Tight pants will keep your wee-wee from ever growing any bigger."

"Nu-uh! You lie."

"Maybe, but maybe I am telling the truth. Do you really want to risk having a little wee-wee all your life?"

I didn't believe her, or rather I didn't want to believe her, but a part of me couldn't help wondering, "What if?"

And then she said something that convinced me to give up tight pants forever. That was something, which would make my mother very happy too.

"Plus, I've read that wearing tight fitting clothing can make you incontinent."

"What does incon...that thing you said, mean?"

"Incontinent means you can't stop peeing your pants."

"Really?" I gasped.

"Well," she shrugged, "it must be true."

"Wow." I gasped again.

"Suck in your gut." she instructed and finally got the, button to pop loose.

"That wouldn't have been so difficult if you hadn't wet your pants." Aunt Catharine teased.

"Uh, I wouldn't need my pants washed if someone didn't first tickle me and then make me run into the wrong house and get the crap scared out of me!"


I looked at Dr. Lizy and said, "And I didn't say crap, but the other word."


Aunt Catharine frowned, "I didn't make you run into Hillary's house. You did that one on your own." And then she screwed up her face like she'd just had a very painful thought.

"What?" I asked.

"Did Hillary really make you doody in your pants?"

"Noooo." I said slightly insulted by the idea.

My zipper came down and with her thumbs tucked into the waistband of my skivvies she yanked them both down to my knees.

"What is that?" she asked when she saw the tattoo on the front of my right thigh.

Playing dumb I said, "What?"

"Don't be funny. That had better be a fake tattoo or someone is going to be in big trouble and it won't be me."

"I did it with marker." I confessed.

She gave me her, `I'm not happy' face.

"I tried to wash it off, but it wouldn't go away."

"What kind of marker did you use?"

I could feel her breathing on my privates as she leaned down to get a closer look at the image I had drawn on myself.

"Is that a turtle?"

"It was supposed to be a hawk, but I didn't do so good with the beak." I said.

"Well, we'll see if we can't get you off."

"You mean get it off." I corrected.

"Yeah, I meant `it' off." she said.


I looked up at Dr. Lizy and flushed red hot as I realized what I had just told her.

"It's OK Simon. Please Continue."


Well, Aunt Catharine finished undressing me and started the washer before she took me to her newly renovated bathroom, which was nice, but it wasn't as cool as the rest of the house. Then again, how cool can a bathroom be? You got a sink, a bathtub and a toilet. Pretty hard to make that any better.

Aunt Catharine put me into the bathtub, however in the past she would always wash me herself or at least stay with me while I washed, but this time she didn't.

"Aunt Catharine, where are you going?" I asked.

"You just sit there and soak a while. I am going to go see if I can find something that will get that ink off of you."

She was gone a good while; long enough that I was pruned when she returned.

"You look like a little white raisin." she said when she had me lifted me out of the tub and sat me on the toilet.

"That stuff stinks!" I objected when she pored some nasty smelling stuff onto a fist full of paper towels.

"It is supposed to stink. It's turpentine."

"What is tur-pen..."

"Turpentine. It's used to remove paint, ink and other things."

She went to work scrubbing my leg nearly raw.

"Why does it have to smell so bad?" I said with my nose pinched shut.

"Because that is the way God made it."

"Is it working?" I asked.

"Yes, but not entirely. I am afraid there's nothing else we can do, but to," she wrapped her fingers around my leg at the very top, "cut it off."

I let go a worried laugh as I squealed, "Noooooo!"

She stuck a finger in her right ear, "And that was my ear you just blew out."

I giggled.

"Alright, back in the tub."

"I've already been in there forever!"

"You want to go around all weekend smelling like turpentine?" she asked.

I groaned loudly as I climbed back into the bathtub.

"The water is cold now." I whined.

She warmed it back up before I sat myself down.

"Can I take a shower next time?" I asked as I looked at the really cool shower thing hanging from the ceiling.

"Maybe tomorrow," Aunt Catharine said.

She proceeded to thoroughly wash me starting with my hair, which she would always wash twice, then worked her way down saving my backside and privates for last just like always.

Out of the tub again, Aunt Catharine took her time drying me off and combing my hair. She even used the blow-dryer on my hair and to warm my feet and my privates, which always feels good in the winter, but not so good in the summer time.

From somewhere out in the other room came a loud annoying buzzing sound.

"Clothes are clean." Aunt Catharine announced.

And that gave me an idea.

"Can I wear those one shorts you said you bought me?"

"You mean the ones with the Batman symbol on them?"

"Yeah." I said excitedly.

"Those are for sleeping not for wearing during the day time."

Disappointed I grunted, "Oh."

"I have something else for you to wear, which I think you are going to like."

"What is it?" I asked excitedly.

She didn't answer, but turned away from me and started hanging up the towel on the towel bar.

"Aunt Catharine, don't make me guess, pleeeease."


I stopped and explained for Dr. Lizy's benefit, "That used to be Aunt Catharine's favorite games, to make me guess about everything. She doesn't do it much, now that I'm grown."

I continued like I hadn't taken that short detour.


"I wasn't planning on it." Aunt Catharine laughed.

"Well teeeeeeelll meeeeee!"

She put a hand on my bare back and led me from the bathroom.

"Remember that Sumo Wrestling show we watched the last time you were here?" she asked.


"Well, I got you, your very own Mawashi."

"My own what?"

"Mawashi. The belt like garment that Sumo Wrestlers wear is called a Mawashi."



"Oh." I said as we were making our way through the living room.

"Oh man, you have a fireplace now too?" I exclaimed when I saw it on the wall opposite the television. "Can we roast marshmallows later?"

"It's not that kind of fireplace."


"It doesn't burn real wood or gas."

"Is it electric?" I asked, thinking it might be like the one dad puts in our living room every Christmas.

"No, it uses a special kind of gel that comes in cans."

"Oh." I said slightly disappointed.

"But we can still use it tonight. The nice thing about a gel fireplace is, that they can be used winter or summer because they don't put out a lot of heat."

I was again surprised to find that her bedroom was completely over the top awesome. The second I saw it I flew into the air and dropped down on the king sized bed.

"You break my new bed and I'm going to break your, butt." Aunt Catharine warned me.

"Too late!" I flipped over on my tummy and slapped my rear end, "It is already broke."

I drew with my finger, "See it has a crack."

She was on me in an instant; pinned me to the bed and began to playfully spank me. I played along by howling and moaning like she was really hurting me, but then she really did.

"HEY NO BITING!" I shouted when Aunt Catharine bit my left rear cheek.

"But you taste so good."

"I probably taste like turpentine."

"That reminds me, I have to take that back to Mort."


This time, when Dr. Lizy interrupted me, there was something odd in her eyes, but I didn't pick up on it right away.

"Who is Mort?" she asked.

"He was this man that used to come over all the time and fix stuff for Aunt Catharine. He was really nice `cause he always brought me stuff whenever I was there."

I adjusted myself in the chair as I said, "Somebody shot him and he died."

"Oh my; how dreadful." Dr. Lizy said, but somehow I could tell she wasn't as surprised as she led me to believe.

I fingered my lips and then asked, "What was I saying before about Aunt Catharine?"

Dr. Lizy looked at her notes before answering, "You were telling me about your Aunt biting your bottom and then getting up to return the turpentine."

"Oh yeah!" I said. "I asked Aunt Catharine if I should wait for her."

"And what did she say to you?" Dr. Lizy asked.

She said, "No, I think we can first get you dressed and then get you settled down in front of my Xbox before I run down there again."

I exploded excitedly with limbs thrashing to try and get away from Aunt Catharine.

"You got me an Xbox?" I squealed.

"Noooo, I got me an Xbox, but you can play with it if you want."

I kept trying to get off the bed, but every time I would start to get up, Aunt Catharine would knock me over again.

"AUNT CATHARINE I WANT TO GET UP!" I whined and giggled.

"What did I tell you last time you were here?" she asked me.

Giggling I replied with, "I don't know. You tell me all kinds of stuff."

"About the whining?" she reminded me.

Acting dumb I said, "Ooooh! The whining?!"

"Yeah, you better keep it in check or you will be drinking Tabasco sauce again."

"Noooooooooooooooooooo!" I moaned at the dreadful thought of having to taste that burning hot stuff again.

"That's it!" she started to get off the bed, "I am getting hot sauce."

I sprang off the bed and onto her back in an effort to stop her, but she had sensed my attack and had turned to try and block or catch me, but what happened was, that her right elbow came back at just the right time for me to ram my nuts into it.

I fell to the floor hard and instantly curled into a ball while cupping my throbbing balls.


Aunt Catharine seemed to think this was funny and a perfect Kodak moment. I don't know where it came from, but suddenly she had a small digital camera and snapped a picture.

"Aunt Catharine, don't take my picture!" I shouted and tried to get up to run somewhere and hide, but my nuts hurt way too much to move more than a foot before I fell again.

There was a second flash from the camera.

"AUNT CATHARINE!" I shouted too loud, but it worked `cause she stopped with that stupid camera.

"Well, what do you want me to do? Kiss it and make it better?"

"Noooo!" I moaned and tried to kick her, but I missed by a mile.

"Tell you what." Aunt Catharine started to say, "You lay right there and I'll run the turpentine back down to Mort. When I come back, we'll get you dressed in your Mawashi."

"Aunt Catharine, it hurts so baaaad!" I continued to moan, but she was already out of the room.

A moment later I heard the front door close.

It only took a minute or two for her to come back and by then I was feeling well enough that I could stand and almost walk normally.

I ventured out of the bedroom to greet her as she returned. The knob turned and the door opened, except it wasn't Aunt Catharine that came in. It was Hillary.

I froze when she saw me nearly naked. I would have been totally naked had I not still been walking with my hands over my privates. Our eyes met and for maybe three seconds neither spoke nor moved. Then, when I finally realized that it wasn't Aunt Catharine, I let go a shrill cry that I am sure was heard on the other side of the world.

She acted like she wanted to come in and leave at the same time. Hillary should have left, `cause before she knew it Aunt Catharine had returned and she was none too happy that Hillary was almost in Aunt Catharine's house. I didn't see what Aunt Catharine did to her, `cause after I had cried out, I turned, ran all the way to the bedroom and dove under the bed.

However, in my heightened state of freaked out, as I slid under the bed, I managed to somehow partially knock the mattress and box springs off the bed frame. I was pinned under them, but not so much that they were squashing me, only keeping me in place until Aunt Catharine came to rescue me. I don't know how long I was trapped under Aunt Catharine's bed. It was probably only seconds, or maybe minutes, but it felt like hours. I had time to panic, then calm down. I even thought that, for a while there, little naked green men from Mars, who were only about a foot tall, came to visit me.

"Simon?" Aunt Catharine called out for me. "Simon, where are you?"

"Aunt Catharine! Thank God you're back!" I said desperately, close to tears.

Aunt Catharine called out again, "Simon is that you?"

"Is it me?" I shouted and then said to myself, "Ha! Is it me?"

I took a deep breath and said, "Aunt Catharine, I've been here so long! I think I've been hallucinating. Just a minute ago I thought Martians were here."

Sounding closer Aunt Catharine called my name again, "Simon?"

"Maybe they weren't from Mars. Maybe they were naked Leprechauns.

Her voice seemed farther this time as she again called for me, "Simon?"

"In the bedroom!" I shouted.

"Are you all right?"

"No, I'm not all right. Not at all."

I could see Aunt Catharine's shoes for a second then she left again while asked, "Where are you?"

"I'm in the bedroom!" I shouted again.

"No, you're not. I was just in there."

"Aunt Catharine, I'm in the bedroom. I swear it." My voice cracked as I felt myself about to cry, "Please believe me."

"Now will you stop fooling around, Simon? I'm not in the mood after dealing with that witch!"

Aunt Catharine's shoes came and went again.

I swallowed the lump in my throat, sniffled the snot back into my head and tried to speak calmly, "I'm right here."

Aunt Catharine's voice, now irritated and stern, called out, "Look Simon, enough is enough."

Loosing my temper I shouted, "I'm right here!"

Her shoes returned.

Sounding like she was about to loose her temper too, she asked, "Where?"

"Under the bed." I whimpered.

She stepped closer and must have finally, realized that the bed wasn't sitting properly.

"Ohh!" she said and then began to chuckle, which turned into giggles, which then erupted into howls of laughter.

"Oh, laughing." I said sarcastically, "You're laughing while I am slowly being crushed to death."

"What are you doing under there?" she asked as she walked closer to the bed, "Are you ok?"

"Are you nuts?" I shouted, "Get me the hell out of here!"

The fact that I cussed just then had nothing to do with Aunt Catharine's cussing rule, but `cause I had finally lost my cool.

She walked around to the far side of the bed where, unbeknownst to either of us, the fingers of my right hand were sticking out.

I let loose a scream, "Aunt Catharine, you're on my fingers."

"Oh..." she said quickly jumping off them.

She shuffled to the foot of the bed to lift the mattress and bedspring so that I could climb out, but her dang big feet stepped on my other hand.

I shouted, "OTHER FINGERS!"

"Well move your hands out of the way!" she urged with desperation.

Mad and crying now, I shouted again, "I CAN'T!"

Careful this time not to step on any tender part of me, she positioned herself, got a firm grip under the bedspring and lifted. As soon as I felt the pressure off me I scurried out from under the bed. I stood against the wall with my aching fingers stuffed into my mouth as a few frightened tears rolled down my cheeks.

Aunt Catharine kissed my forehead, wiped away my tears and apologized, "I'm sorry."

She got the bed back on the frame, which took her all of twenty seconds.

I pulled my fingers from my mouth to say, "You know, I'd help you with that, but somebody stepped on all my fingers."

"Simon, I said I was sorry." she said, "Besides, I didn't expect your fingers to be there."

She gave me a hug and kissed my fingers.

"Hey? You are wet!" I exclaimed and pulled away from her.

She smiled, "Rain tends to get one wet."

"It's raining?" I asked.

"Only a little, but I think it'll get worse in a little while."

She gave me another hug, or she tried to, but I pushed her away.

"No, I don't want to." I whined.

"Some has got their panties in a bunch." she said, trying to get me to stop sulking.

I signed and sniffled, "I know. I'm just cranky."

"Well, having a bed fall on me would probably make me cranky too." She said and then smirked, "Oh, and having Hillary see you naked well..."

Ignoring her dampness, I buried my face in her shirt, "That was soooo embarrassing."

"Well, you saw her in her unmentionables. I guess you're even now." Aunt Catharine said.

Speaking with my face buried in her bosom I said, "That don't mean I can't be cranky."

"Let me see your fingers." she asked.

I pulled my face from her shirt and held my fingers up for her to inspect.

"Does this hurt." she squeezed my left pinky.

"OUCH!" I shouted and tried to kick her in the shin.

However, I had mannered to forget that I wasn't wearing shoes.

"Son of a..." I shouted when I nearly broke my poor toes on her leg.

"Oh that had to hurt." Aunt Catharine teased me.

"It sure as hell didn't tickle!" I swore

"Don't you think you're taking this cussing thing a bit too far?"

"Hell no!" I said with a chuckle.

She half smiled as she said, "Ok then."

I limped to the living room and fell into the nearest chair.

"First my nuts get smashed, then Hillary sees me naked and when I tried to run and hide I was nearly crushed to death. Oh and let's not forget that SOMEONE stepped on my fingers and tried to break my toes."

"My poor, poor baby." Aunt Catharine said from inside the bedroom.

I shouted back, "I'm not a baby!" and then mumbled for my own sake, "My body and mind are never going to be the same again."

"Well if your nuts still hurt I can still kiss them to make them better." she teased again.

"Aaaaunt Caaaaathhhhaaarrrinnnne, stooooop teeeeeeasing meeeee!" I whined.

"So why don't you bring your broken, naked, whining body back in here and let me get this Mawashi wrapped around you."

The idea of wearing a real Sumo belt was enough to get me to forget my injuries and jump to my feet.

"Is that it?" I said as I walked back into the room and saw Aunt Catharine unfolding a long make that very long piece of white fabric.

"Yep, and it's all for you."

"Uh, I thought they were like... well different." I said.

"It might not look like much now, but I read up on how to wrap it around you just the way Sumo wrestlers do."

I stepped up to Aunt Catharine who began by having me hold one end of the cloth up near my chin while she laced it through my legs from front to back.

"Now reach back and hold it."

I reached back and she placed my hand right where she wanted it to be.

"Now I want you to begin turning yourself slowly to the left."

Just like she said I slowly spun around and around until she had wrapped the cloth around my waist three times.

Facing her again she took the extra bit of fabric from the front and folded it into the bands around my middle.

"Ok turn around so I can tie it in the back." she said to me and I obeyed.

It took the longest time just to get it all tied in the back, but when she was done I felt just like a real Sumo wrestler.

"OK, go to the bathroom and look at yourself in the big mirror on the back of the door."

I ran from the bedroom to the bathroom to see what I looked like. I turned this way and that to try to see myself in the Mawashi from every possible angle.

"I look so cool!" I said loud enough for Aunt Catharine to hear me all the way in the bedroom.

"What?" she said, but she was right on the other side of the door and startled me.

I giggled, "You need to wear a bell."

"You trying to say I am a cow?" She teased.

"Huh?" I grunted to show my confusion.

"Cow bell, get it?" Aunt Catharine said.

"Ohh! I get it!" I chuckled.


Dr. Lizy interrupted me again, this time to ask if Aunt Catharine was over weight back then.

I thought about it for a minute before I answered, "No, she didn't really start getting bigger until after that visit."

Again Dr. Lizy hummed like she knew something I didn't know.

"What?" I asked.

"Nothing, please continue." Dr. Lizy said without looking up from her note pad.

If she had looked up, she would have seem me scowling at her for being so cagey. She knows how much it irritates me.

I took a deep breath and let it out before going on with what I had been saying.


When I had enough of seeing myself in the mirror, I ventured back out of the bathroom and found Aunt Catharine in the kitchen.

"Whatcha doing?" I asked cutely.

She said to guess, so I did.

"Making a super powered evil poison so you can take over the world?"

Sounding amused she said, "I'm making our dinner."

"Well, I was close." I said.

She chuckled, "How was that close?"

I desperately tried not to laugh as I said, "I've tasted your cooking, remember?"

"Why you little!" she snarled and tried to throw a kitchen towel at me, but it only went about four feet before fluttering to the floor.

She looked my way with a quick glance and then had to look a second time. She was examining me from head to toe.

I looked down and then back as I asked, "What?"

Smiling mischievously she said, "You look like you're wearing a big diaper."

"You can't say that!" I stomped my foot and objected, "Us Sumo wrestlers hate when you call our Mawashi a diaper."

"Oh," she chuckled and tried to hide her smile behind her hand, "so now you speak for all Sumo wrestlers?"

I went over and picked up the towel Aunt Catharine had attempted to throw at me.

"Yes," I said, "and you better not call it a diaper again or I'll... I'll... I'll think of something later, but I bet you won't like it!"

She reached into the refrigerator and pulled out a jar of what looked like rotten eyeballs.

I made a disgusted face and asked, "Eeew, what's that?"

She sat the jar down on the counter and turned to me with one hand on her hip.

"What?" I said while backing up half a step.

"Why aren't you playing Xbox?" she asked.

"Oh boy! I forgot about the Xbox!" I shouted and ran for the television.

Aunt Catharine got me started and then went back to conjuring something up for us to eat. I had to stop playing long enough to eat and then afterward help clean the dishes before I was allowed to go back to my paused game.

Aunt Catharine was just about to join me on the floor playing Xbox when the telephone rang. I don't think I heard what the conversation was about, but afterward Aunt Catharine looked upset.

"What's wrong?" I asked her.

"Baby boy I have to go out for a while. Do you want to come with me or should I see if I can get someone to come stay with you for an hour or two?"

I sighed heavily. This wasn't the first time Aunt Catharine had to leave while I was staying with her. And like the other secrets, mom and dad were never to know that Aunt Catharine went away while she was supposed to be watching me.

"Can Mort come over again?" I asked.

Mort was the man that used to come over all the time to fix stuff for Aunt Catharine. On more than one occasion Aunt Catharine had left me in his care which I didn't mind `cause Mort was so much fun.

She tilted her head to one side, "I don't know. I got the idea when I was over there earlier that he had plans this evening."

"Can you just ask him? Maybe he will come over anyway." I pleaded.

With a huff that said she wasn't happy about having to go out she went back to the phone and called Mort. As I remember it, they didn't talk very long, only a few seconds.

"Will he come?" I asked when she hung up the phone.

She nodded, "He said he'll be right over."

"YIPPEEEEEEEE!" I cried and began to run for the front door excitedly.

"We better get you changed before he gets here." Aunt Catharine suggested.

"Nooooo!" I whined, "I don't want to change. I want Mort to see my Mawashiiiiii!"

She threw up her hands and disappeared into the bedroom, presumable to get ready to go while I ran to the front window to watch for Mort.

"I see him! No wait, that ain't him." I shouted.

"Come give your Aunty Catharine a kiss."

I ran to her, kissed her on the cheek and then ran back to the window.

"I'll be right back." She said while rummaging inside her purse.

I knew that she wouldn't be right back. In the past, when she had to `run out for a minute' she was gone a lot longer then a minute, or even an hour. Aunt Catharine wasn't going to be back until very late tonight.


"Where did your Aunt go?" Dr. Lizy asked me.

I sighed and shrugged, "I dunno, but every time she came back, she always brought me a prize."

Dr. Lizy adopted a confused expression as she asked, "What sort of prize?"

I shrugged again, "I dunno, like toys and stuff. Once she brought me a cool car that went down stairs and stuff and didn't break." I stuck a finger in my ear and twisted it to scratch an itch, "I don't know whatever happened to the car?"

"Can you tell me more about Mort?" Dr. Lizy asked.

I smiled wide, "He was like the coolest."

I sat still for a minute before saying, "I don't remember Aunt Catharine leaving, but I remember him coming. He came after she left I think. Yeah that's what happened."

Dr. Lizy went back to taking notes as I continued my story.


I was so amazed when he came in and said, "Hey, nice Mawashi! You look just like the Sumo wrestlers I've seen on TV!"

I ran up to him and leapt into his arms.

"Aunt Catharine bought an Xbox. Do you want to play with me?" I said.

"I know she did, I helped her pick it out." He told me.

"Oh." I said and we started playing Xbox right away.

We played for a couple hours before he said he wanted to watch a movie. Right as we were about to settle down to watch the movie I needed to go pee, but couldn't figure out how to go while wearing the Mawashi. Mort surprised me again when he knew how to move the fabric out of the way in the front, even though it was so snug. He held the fabric to one side while I peed; afterward he shook all the extra pee out of my penis and then tucked everything back inside the Mawashi.

"Alright, time for a movie mister diaper boy."

"Hey! It isn't a diaper!" I said stomping my foot and shaking my fist at him.

"Well it looks like one to me." He chuckled and then added, "Sumo wrestlers don't use fists. They push their adversaries around with their big diaper covered bodies."

"AAAHHHH!" I cried out as I attacked Mort.

But he just reached behind me, grabbed me by the Mawashi and carried me to the living room where he dropped me on the large white sofa.

"Hey that was kind of fun." I said.

He was rubbing his arm, "Yeah, but you are getting to big for me to lug around."

"I ain't fat!"

"I didn't say fat I said big, as in you keep growing up. I wish you would stay little and cute forever."

"Well I can't help that!" I said.

He went to the kitchen and nuked us some popcorn.

"Hey what do we have here?" he said with his head inside the refrigerator.

I walked into the kitchen and he was pulling a bottle from the refrigerator that looked like the ones I'd seen in the laundry room.

"Why don't you toss that bag in the microwave and I'll poor the two of us something to drink."

I watched the popcorn bag inflate and listened to the unrythmic melody of the kernels popping. Two minutes later the popcorn was done and pored into a glass bowl. With me carrying the popcorn and him our drinks, we retired to the sofa.

He plopped down beside me and pulled me in close, "Just us guys and a good flick."

"What does flick mean?" I asked.

"That's an old fashion way of saying movie. It comes from the sound movies used to make inside the projector.

"What's a projector?"

He picked up a piece of popcorn and fed it to me, "Baby, shut up and watch the movie."

"I'm no baby!"

"That was a figure of speech."

I fed him a piece of popcorn as the DVD started.

"What we going to watch?" I asked.

"A very funny movie called, Young Frankenstein."

"Is it scary?" I asked.

"No, just funny."

"Good, I don't want to do another scary movie."

He handed me one of the glasses, "Here try this."

"What is it?"

"Nectar of the gods."

"Huh?" I said with a scrunched up nose.


"Oh." I said and sniffed my glass. "Aunt Catharine said she might let me have a sip."

"Well, now you get to have your very own glass."

"Smells like juice." I commented.

"Taste it. It's sort of a desert wine. Most wines you would find bitter, but this one has a sweetness that I think you might enjoy."

I sniffed it again.

"You know those sweet and sour candies you like?"

I nodded.

"It's like that, only different."

I took a sip.

Using his thumb he wiped away the red mustache the wine had given me. I made a sour face and had to shake my head to rid myself of the after effect of the sweet and bitter aftertaste.


Wanting Mort to think I was all grown up like him, I said, "I think I like it."

"Try a bigger sip."

I did and this time it made me pucker big time. I grinned past the strong urge to spit it back out and swallowed it down.

"Like it huh?"

"Yeah it is good." I lied.

We sat there watching the movie, eating popcorn and drinking wine. I don't think I have ever laughed as much as I did during that movie. It was so hilarious!

"I feel funny." I commented not very far into the movie.

"Kind of feels good huh?" he asked.

My head was swimming as Mort took the bowl of popcorn and my empty glass from me and set them on the table.

"Isis this real life?"

Mort chuckled, "Yes this is real life and you are drunk."

"Ok, now"

"You feel good?" he asked.

"I can't feel anything."

"Yes you can."

Mort leaned forward and I fell over so that I was behind him.

"You ok baby doll?"

"III don't feel sleepy."

"You don't?"

He sat me back up as I was shaking my head.

My head fell back against the sofa and I was looking right at Mort.

With wide eyes I said, "You have two heads!"

"Oh yeah?"

Exasperated I held up my hands, "III feel strange!"

"That is because you are drunk." He said while petting my bare chest.

I reached up and tried to feel his hairy chest.

"II can't feel you."

"You can't?"

"Hey you knowyou know what?" I stammered.

"What's that?"

"You don't got a shirt on no more."

"I took it off because it is so warm in here."

My head fell forward and he caught it in his hand.

"I think you need to go to bed."

"II think you... I think you need to go to bed too."

"Maybe we should both go to bed." He suggested.

With that, Mort scooped me into his arms and carried me to the bedroom where he deposited me on the bed.

"Wwhat are you doing?" I asked.

"Taking off your wet Mawashi."

My eyes didn't seem to want to work right and I had to really concentrate to see Mort.

"I don't want to."

"It's ok. I have another kind of Mawashi for you."

"You do?"

"Yep. It is a special Mawashi just for sleeping in."

"It is?" I asked and then I said, "Do you got on a Mawmaw..."

"Yes, I am wearing a special sleeping Mawashi too."

"What happened to the movie?"

"I stopped it. We can finish watching it tomorrow if you want."


"We can watch the movie tomorrow?"

"With popcorn and wine?"

"Well, maybe cokes instead." He said.

"I feeeeeel numb all over." I moaned and with that I zonked out for the night and didn't wake until very late the next morning.



The morning light was blazing through the bedroom window and despite repeated attempts on my part to block it out by pulling the covers of Aunt Catharine's bed up over my head, somehow the rays still seemed to find me.

Finally surrendering to the idea that I was awake, I slowly started to lift my head from the pillow, but then the most incredible pain shot through my head. It was like someone was tap-dancing on my brain. I've no idea how I managed to get set up right, my feet hanging over the bed. Odd parts of my body seemed to be aching; my backside and my head with my brain being the worst of them. I looked back over my shoulder to the other side of the bed, only to find that Aunt Catharine wasn't there like I expected her to be. A quick glance to the small alarm clock on the dresser told me that it was eleven minutes past eight.

No sooner had I sat up right than I felt a strong urge deep down inside of me, like I was going to have diarrhea maybe. I jumped from the bed and flew to the bathroom and almost didn't make it in time. My bottom wasn't even in full contact with the toilet before my bum-hole opened up.

Mort must have heard me `cause he appeared in the doorway to the bathroom.

"Hey Sport, how you feeling this morning?", but I didn't need to answer him. He could see for himself.

"Oh you look like hell."

"Where is Aunt Catharine? I don't feel so good." I said, allowing my head to fall forward.

"What's the matter?"

"It hurts."

"Your head?"


He chuckled quietly, "You've got a hang over."

I lifted my head enough to look at him and grunt, "Get Aunt Catharine."

"I can't. She called late last night and said she wasn't going to be home until later today."


Dr. Lizy interrupted by asking, "Did she normally leave you like that?"

I shook my head, "No, I mean she left sometimes, but only one other time that I remember, that she didn't come home."

She hummed knowingly again, but this time I chose to ignore it and went on with what I had been saying.

"Anyway, like I was saying, Aunt Catharine wasn't there, but Mort still was. As I was sitting on the toilet I let go a groan to which Mort said something like, `You stay put; I have just the thing for that.' And he was gone long enough for me to finish evacuating my bowels, but I hadn't yet cleaned up back there before his return."


"What's that?" I asked when he started to hand me a thin tall glass of what looked like blood with a long piece of celery hanging out of it.

"Mainly tomato juice with a few spices and other things thrown in."

I took the glass, it was very cold. A sniff test told me nothing.

He then held out his left hand to show me he had two pills in his hand. I instinctively opened my mouth as he placed the pills on the back of my tongue.

"Just drink it right down."

Trusting him, I took a big gulping mouthful and nearly spit it back out.

"Swallow!" he said slow and sternly.

I obeyed, albeit grudgingly.

"Auuh! That is nasty!" I complained after the pills and spicy tomato juice went down my throat.

He guided the glass back to my lips and said, "Come on, drink it all down. Best to do it quickly."

I took a deep breath and started chug-a-lugging the tomato and spice concoction.

"Attaboy." He said when I had finished.

He took the glass from me as a loud fart bubble popped out of me and I winced.

"You ok?"

"That one hurt a little." I grinned.

He sat the glass on the pedestal sink and asked, "Are you done yet?"

I knew he was asking if I was done going poop. I nodded and instantly regretted moving my head.

I stood up from the toilet and turned around so he could clean up my backside. Now facing the toilet I looked down in the bowl and seen that there wasn't much in there. Just a small floater and a bunch of gross looking yellowish mucus or something and...

"Mort, blood!" I said worriedly pointing into the toilet.

He looked in too and made an unconcerned `oh' sound without saying a word about it.

That wasn't the first time I'd seen blood in my poop. It has happened twice before that I know of. Once after Aunt Catharine let me camp in Mort's back yard and the last time when I was at Aunt Catharine's which was also the only other time I can remember her leaving and not coming back home until the next day.

Mort said it is normal to have a little blood in my poop and that I shouldn't worry `cause everyone has that happen sometimes.

"OUCH!" I moaned as he was cleaning deep in my crack and had pressed against my hole.

"That tender?" he asked.

"Uh yeah, what was your first clue?"

"Don't be cute or I'll get the feather again!" he threatened.

Aunt Catharine has this hat with a HUGE ostrich feather in it. Mort doesn't ever get mad or spank me like dad does; instead, he takes off all my clothes, ties me down on the bed and tickles me with that feather. It is unbearable!


Dr. Lizy asked, "Did Mort do that very often?"

"No, only when I was being bad." I answered and then picked up where I'd left off.


"OOOW Mort!" I complained when it hurt back there again.

He tossed the last piece of toilet paper into the bowl and flushed.

"How's your head feeling?" he asked.

I paused to check.

"Little better I think." I said with a smile.


As he was washing both of our hands in the sink I began to wonder about last night.

"Did we finish watching that movie?" I asked.

"No, you got drunk and I had to put you to bed."

"I did?" I asked with amazement and pride, "I really was drunk?"

"That is why your head hurts this morning." He said while drying our hands with one of the guest towels. "It's called a hangover and they are not fun."

"Did you have a hangover when you got up?" I asked.

"No, I don't get hangovers very often because I don't let myself get drunk."

"How come I got drunk and you didn't?"

"Because you are still a little guy and it doesn't take a lot of wine to get you drunk."


He petted my hair with one hand and caressed my cheek with the other as he said, "I promise I won't tell anyone you got drunk. I wouldn't want your Aunt or your parents to be mad at you. I also won't tell them about the blood or being sore. We wouldn't want them taking you to a doctor over something silly like that. The doctors might poke you with lots of needles and make you take nasty medicine."

Heading out of the bathroom and toward the kitchen I thought nothing of either of us being naked or as Mort calls it, au naturel. Mort is cool that way. Whenever no one else is around, like when we are at his place or out in his fenced in backyard, Mort says we can run around the way God intended us to, but then I remembered the Mawashi.

"Mort? Can I wear the Mawashi again?"

"Not right now, it needs to be washed."

"How come?"

"Because someone peed in it last night." He said as if he were describing the color of the sky.

I stopped dead in my tracks, "I did?"

"It's no big thaaang." He said playfully. "You want some breakfast?"

The idea of eating made my stomach gurgle.

"Uugh no!" I said while holding my belly.

He turned and chuckled as he leaned down and gave me a big hug and a kiss to my forehead. "That will go away with the hangover."

I climbed up on one of the two stools that bellied up to the counter and allowed me to look into the kitchen as Mort washed and put away the glass I'd just drank from in the bathroom.

When I lowered my bare backside to the hard wooden stool I felt a sharp pain that radiated up my spine. Mort saw the pained expression on my face.

"You alright?" he asked.

I shook my head as I again tried to lower myself onto the stood.

"It hurts back there." I said pointing with one hand while using my other to support some of my weight.

Mort was acting kind of funny... I mean funnier then normal for him. Finally, he put the glass into the cupboard and walked around to my side of the counter. Taking my hand he led me to the bedroom where he sat down on the bed and instructed me to lay across his knees.

However, before I had a chance to obey there was a loud crash outside the bedroom window.

I jumped, "What was that?"


"THUNDER?" I asked with amazement, "But the sun was shining when I woke up. It was in my eyes."

He chuckled, "You must have been dreaming because it has been raining all night."

"Oh noooo!" I exclaimed.

"Come on." He said, taking me by the wrist and pulling me over his knee, where he began to thoroughly inspect my bottom.

"Tell me if this hurts."

"No." I said when he gave my left cheek and then my right cheek a firm squeeze.

"How about this?"

I winced and my body clenched, including my butt cheeks, as his finger pressed against my butt hole.

"OOOOWWWW!" I exclaimed.

"Hummm," he hummed, "Stand up now."

I did and watched as Mort walked back out of the bedroom.

I started to follow, but he said to me, "No, you can wait here. I'll only be a second."

When he returned he had several items in his arms, tubes and jars, but I didn't get to see what they were.

He set them on the bed, sat down and pulled me back over his knees.

"I have some stuff here that will make it feel much better, but first we're going to have to make sure there isn't any more doodies inside of you."

Despite my reassurance that there wasn't anything left in me, he still insisted that we had to be sure.

"You're going to feel a tiny bit of pressure." He said, but I didn't feel hardly anything, except maybe just a twinge of soreness back there as something was inserted into me.

"What are you doing?" I asked while trying to rotate my head around backwards.

"Lie still please."

"Ok, now let that medicine work its magic then we'll get you cleaned up, put some more medicine on your tushy and you'll feel much better."

No sooner had Mort stood me back up, then I began to feel a very strong urge to go number two again. I started to turn to run to the bathroom, but Mort had seized me by the wrist.

"Mort! I got to go poooop nooooow!"

"You need to wait and let the medicine do its job properly."

I willed my butt cheeks to clamp closed as tightly as I could possibly squeeze them. My thighs and knees joined in to help hold back the building pressure inside of me. The whole time Mort continued to grip my wrist tightly, not allowing me to do what so urgently needed to be done. He was smiling and looking calm.

"Breathe." He said to me.

"Mort I got to gooooooo!" I moaned.

"Breathe." He said again while demonstrating.

I tried to imitate him, but the pressure within me was excruciating.


He finally released my wrist and I ran as fast as I could for the bathroom. The instant my cheeks were over the bowl, I exploded with the force of a hundred atom bombs and it didn't stop. After the initial explosion Mort walked in and leaned against the doorjamb. I felt my insides cramping again before a second explosion, not as powerful as the first, but still powerful nonetheless.

I moaned and folded myself in half as a third cramping forced even more from my bowels. Desperate and scared I looked up to Mort for reassurance.

"You are doing just fine. The medicine will get all that dirty stuff out of you."

I had to suffer through a couple more contractions each one a little less painful until they stopped completely.

"You done?" he asked.

Panting and exhausted I nodded and wiped the sweat from my brow with my arm.

Instead of cleaning my butt with toilet paper this time, he made me get into the shower.

I had a chance to look in the toilet as I was getting up and seen that this time it was filled with lots of brown nasty liquid and some chunks of poop. For all of a second I wondered why that stuff didn't come out earlier when I woke up, but that thought left me when Mort climbed into the shower with me.


"Had Mort ever taken showers with you in the past?" Dr. Lizy asked.

I had to think about that really hard before I answered, "I'm not sure. Maybe. Yeah, I think maybe he did. I ain't so sure."

"That's ok. So what happened next?"

"Well, he smiled really big, like he was getting his picture taken and asked me how I felt."

"And how did you feel?" Dr. Lizy asked.

With a small chuckle I said, "Empty."

When she didn't respond I went on with my story.


Mort asked me the same thing, how I was feeling. I don't know what I said to him, but then he asked, "And how is your head feeling?"

I had to actually stop and think about it.

"Better!" I said with surprise, "I mean it still kind of hurts a tiny-tiny bit, but way better."

"See, `Ol Mort isn't as dumb as you thought, huh?" he said while tapping his temple.

Mort dutifully washed every inch of my body and spent more time then normal washing my privates and my backside. I thought we were almost done, but he surprised me by telling me to turn around and bend over so that he could make sure I was completely clean back there.

I felt him soaping up my crack and felt the soap as it pressed against my hole several times. It still was tender, but at the same time the smoothness of the soap was somehow soothing.

And then Mort said, "OK, I'm going to check inside now."


Sitting there in Dr. Lizy's office, I grew quiet.

"Are you alright?" she asked.

I sat motionless and silent, even though in my head I was reliving everything that happened from that point.

"Simon?" Dr. Lizy said with a hint of concern.

I don't know why, but for some reason I started to cry. I wasn't sad or nothing, just for some unknown reason, tears started to fall.

Dr. Lizy got up form her desk, came around and handed me a box of tissues before taking a seat in the chair to my right. She didn't prod me to continue or ask me a bunch of questions. She simply sat there and let me cry.

After several minutes of dabbing away the water works, I began to speak.

"I remember now."

I got quiet again for another minute before I said, "He had done it before."

Soft and almost in a whisper Dr. Lizy asked, "Can you tell me what he did?"

I shook my head hard and dropped the box of tissues as I jumped to my feet and walked over to the window that overlooked the street and the post office on the far side. Outside the sun was shinning brightly and a man was walking a big hairy dog on the other side of the street. Two girls road by on bicycles, followed by a man farther back. I supposed it was their daddy keeping watch over them, but also giving them some space.

"Simon?" Dr. Lizy called softly.

I sniffled, "He had done it before, so I was ready for what came next. He slid a single finger into my ... my hole. He did it slowly and only a bit at a time. I remember wincing as it went in farther and farther."

"I told him it hurt and he told me to be brave and kept asking me if I was ok."

I kept nodding exaggeratedly.


Standing there looking out on the world as though I were watching something on TV and not a part of it; like I had no emotional investment in it. I kind of liked that feeling... no emotions. I swallowed against the lump in my throat and wiped away my tears, but I didn't move away from the window. Somehow I know I had to have the sunlight shining on me when I shared the rest of what had happened.

"He pressed in further and I could feel his fist pressing against my crack. That is how I knew he was all the way in."


"You still doing ok?" he asked.

"Yeah," I moaned.

I felt his finger withdrawing and knew that he wasn't done with me yet. In the past he had warned me when he was about to insert two fingers, but this time he didn't say anything.

I let out a weak scream, "Oooooooha!"

He made a humming sound to try to comfort me.

"I think maybe part of the reason you are so sore is, because you are so tight back here."

Addressing Dr. Lizy I said, "That was a lie! I know why I was so sore back there."

"I put a hand on the side of the tub wall to support myself. It felt like Mort was pushing in more than just two fingers this time."

"Ohhh Ohhh Ohhhh!"

"Hang on! We're going to get you loosened up." Mort said to me.

I let go a low, throaty cry as sparks of electricity were firing out from deep within me. My legs began to buckle and Mort had to reach an arm under me to keep me from dropping to my knees. It felt like his whole fist was inside of me, but then suddenly he stopped and withdrew his fingers. I started to pull my face away from the smooth shower walls to see what he was doing, but he placed a hand on the back of my head and was pushing my face into the corner again.

"I'm not done yet." He said.

I'm not sure what he put in me next, but whatever it was, it was warm and it didn't hurt near as much as his fingers had... well at first anyway. Whatever it was, it went in deeper than his fingers ever have.

"Mort!" I cried softly and desperately.

He hushed me with soft shushing sounds that mimicked the pumping action that was being done behind me.


I grew quiet again as a lady in spandex jogged past.

"Simon?" Dr. Lizy asked.

"Wait." I mumbled, but I didn't continue until the jogger was out of sight.


He began to move the warm object in and out of me; slow at first, but then faster and faster. I had both hands on the wall; my face was pressed in the corner of the side and back wall as he continued to treat my hole by stretching it for me. My entire body was being rocked back and forth as Mort pumped me from behind with greater and greater intensity. With my face still hidden in the corner and Mort's arm under me he began to lift me until my feet were no longer in contact with the floor of the tub.

It all came to an end as the object that was inserted into me was withdrawn and Mort told me, with labored breathing, to stay perfectly still until he told me to move.

Even if I wanted to disobey Mort, there was no way I could have moved. My entire body felt weak. How my legs held up my body while shaking the way they were was beyond my understanding. However, I still had the warm water raining on my back, running down my crack, soothing the soreness as it ebbed over my freshly stretched hole while making its way toward my legs and eventually my feet.

But then the water stopped. Mort's hands were helping me out of the tub. He was sitting on the toilet, drying me with a large, soft, white towel while he kept me facing away from him.

"Can you raise your arms up for me?" he asked in a shaking voice very much unlike Mort's normal voice.

He laced the towel between my legs, wrapped a belt around me from behind and buckled it in the back to hold the towel in place.

"Why are you doing that?" I asked him.

"You need to wear it like that until your bum-hole closes back up after being stretched so much."

I felt his hands on my back, fingers sliding down my spine.

His hands moved over my shoulders, his arms extending around me like two snakes, slowly encircling me. I was pulled backward until my back was against Mort's hairy chest. He nuzzled my neck, kissed my ear and cheek.

"You know I love you very much, don't you?" he asked.

"Yeah." I said, still shaking all over from the treatment I had just endured.

He turned me around without opening his arms up too much. We were chest to chest and I laid my head on his shoulder and whispered.


Once more I grew silent. I was quiet for so long that Dr. Lizy must have thought I was done. I heard her get up from the chair and I spun around fast to see where she was. My sudden movement had alarmed her.

"Simon?" she was talking to me like she was scared of me or something.

"You're alright. You are in my office."

"I know that." I said.

"Can you let me have that?" she asked.

I looked down and in my hands was a pencil. Where did I get a pencil? The point of it was pressed against the palm of my left hand, but hadn't yet broke then skin. The instant I saw the pencil lead pressed into my skin I jerked it away and dropped it on the floor. Dr. Lizy didn't take her eyes off of mine as she knelt before me and retrieved the pencil.


"I told him I loved him." I said.

Dr. Lizy rose back up and slipped the pencil into her other hand before returning to her desk and laying it there.


She turned back around and appeared as though she was about to say something, but I beat her to the punch.

"Can I use your phone?" I asked.

It was obvious she hadn't expected me to say that.

"Excuse me."

"May I use your phone? I need to call Agent Thomas Segal of the FBI."

"I know who he is, but can you tell me why?"

I shook my head, "I need to talk to Tom."

Dr. Lizy was flustered and thrown off her game, but she relented.


"Tom?" I said when I heard a wrong sounding voice say hello.

"Tom can you come to Dr. Liz... I mean Dr. Elizabeth Hound's office."


"Please. I need you right now."

"Ok. I'll be waiting out front."

"Yeah, on the lawn."

"Yes I promise. Just hurry ok. Oh and can you do something about..."

"Yeah, great. Ok, thanks. See you in a minute."

I hung up the phone and looked at Dr. Lizy as she stood there dumfounded. Until this very moment I don't think Dr. Lizy had ever seen this side of me. It was the captain in me, the confident, in control (sort of) and oozing power.

"Simon I don't think..." she started to say.

"I'm sorry Dr. Lizy. Really I am. I bet you think I am freaking out right now or that I should be, but honest I am ok... or I will be after I talked to Tom."

"Simon..." she started again, but I turned and walked out of the room.

Mom, dad and Agent Morris were sitting in the waiting room along with another man and woman with a sad looking teenaged girl whom I assumed was their daughter.

Dad and Mom got up when they saw me emerging from Dr. Lizy's office. I held up my hand and said, "Tom's coming. I need to talk to him."

"What?" Mom said.

"I called Tom and he is coming here. I'm going to talk with him outside for a while."

I started to walk away when Agent Morris stood up and started to follow me. I turned back to him and in a voice far older than me I barked, "ALONE!"

"Wanna bet?" Dad and Agent Morris said in unison.

I stood perfectly still, hands folded and hanging in front of me. We only had to wait like five seconds before Agent Morris's cell phone rang. I couldn't hear what was said, but I had a good idea.

Agent Morris didn't look happy at all as he handed his phone to dad who talked only for a moment before holding it out to Dr. Lizy and saying, "He wants to talk to you too."

I smiled knowing that Tom was telling all of them to stay inside and let us be alone on the front lawn for a while.

I didn't have to wait long for Tom. I had been sitting Indian style on the grass, playing with a lady bug when off in the distance I heard the whine of a siren and the blaring of a car horn. A few seconds later a black SUV, not unlike the one Agent Morris was driving us around in, could be seen speeding up Main Street. It was weaving in and out of traffic with lights flashing out from the front grill.

As the SUV pulled into the parking lot I turned and looked back at the office building to see Agent Morris standing in the same window I'd been at only a few minutes ago. And in the other window were my dad and mom.

"Well I should have expected that much." I said out loud to no one.

"Alright I'm here." Tom said as he came jogging around the far corner of the building.

"You didn't have to come that fast." I said with a chuckle.

He gave me a quizzical stare before saying, "This better be good."

I looked at the windows again and Tom followed suite. Tom gave them the thumbs up and then sat down on the ground beside me.

"I need a favor." I started out saying.

"WHAT?" he shouted at me.

His response didn't surprise me; after all, the way I had asked made it sound like I was going to ask for money or for him to take me out for ice cream.

I chuckled and then, like someone had just opened the emergency flood valves, I burst out crying. That shut Tom right up too.

I started at the beginning and told him everything I'd just told Dr. Lizy, except when I got to the part where I told Mort that I loved him, I didn't stop. I finished my story.


"Holding me tightly Mort stood up and carried me to Aunt Catharine's bedroom, where he tucked me into bed, face down and never once letting me see his face.

My body welcomed the softness of the bed as I stretched out and sank my face into the pillow which smelled like Aunt Catharine.

Mort didn't leave me lying there for very long and I didn't see him come back in `cause I had my face turned toward the window, where flashes of lightning could be seen between the closed slats of the Venetian blinds and the curtains, which had been partially drawn closed.

I felt him loosen the belt and unfold the towel, exposing my backside to him again."

Mort said something like, "I'm going to put some medicine on your bottom. It is going to feel cold at first, but then it should make everything nice and numb."


I sniffled and wiped my nose on my arm as I continued to tell Tom the rest of what happened. "Boy was he right! It was cold at first. It felt like he was rubbing my hole with ice, but as cold as it was, it also felt good. He was thorough in the application. He applied it to my cheeks, my crack and all around my hole. He even slid two fingers in and applied lots of it to the inner parts of my hole. Like I said, he was thorough and took his time. He rubbed my bum with the cooling cream for ten or fifteen minutes. By the time he was finished I was sound asleep."

For the first time since I began talking I looked over at Tom and saw that he was crying too.

"Simon, I am so very sorry that happened to you." He said.

I shook my head, "That's not what I want you to say."

Tom's scared face twisted and became even more deformed as he tried to express his confusion without words.

I took a deep breath, held it a moment and then let it out as I said to him, "I want you to say that you will find Mort, wherever he is now, and kill him."

Tom's face went from confused to grey with shock.

"I'm serious. I want you to find him and kill him the most painful way you can."

Tom's countenance fell. His head was shaking slightly from side to side as he tried to speak, "Simon you don't know what you're saying."

"Yes I do!" I said strongly, "Do you hear my voice? Do I sound like I am freaking out or going nuts, like when you brought me back here, when I was all doped up?"

I shook my head in tempo with Tom's shaking, "Yes I do! I know exactly what I am saying and I mean it Tom."

"Simon you're just upset right now..."

"I'll make you a deal." I said before Tom could finish his thought, "I'll make you a deal that I know you'll take."

Sometimes it is hard to read Tom's facial cues, but that one I got for sure. He was defiantly on the hook, so to speak.

"I'll get you every dime that is left, heck I'll even get a job and pay back everything we've spent."

Tom looked away. His one still working eye was focusing across the street in thought, or I assumed he was thinking about my offer. After a moment my eyes followed his to a guy, or I guessed it was a guy, leaning against the metal pole to which the bus stop sign was bolted. At any other time that person probably would have gone completely unnoticed, except it was already getting pretty warm and whoever that was wasn't dressed for this kind of weather. They had on long blue jeans and a grey pullover hooded sweatshirt, with the hood pulled over their head. Though we were on the other side of the street, I could still tell that he or she was wearing gloves and under the hood sunglasses.

I never heard Tom stand up, but whoever that was over there sure did `cause they took off running down Fisher Street with Tom right after them. A second later Agent Morris flew past me. Dad came running around the building next, lifted me to my feet and forced me to run back around the building and into the office.

Though mom and dad tried to get me to tell them what I had been talking over with Tom, I stayed mum while concentrating on the door and waiting for Tom or Agent Morris to return.

Tom was the first back, breathing hard and looking like he'd just run a marathon. He opened the door and waved for us to come out.

"Come on, let's get go." He said.

"What's going on?" Mom asked.

In the SUV Tom finally said, "I've seen that kid three times now. No idea who he is, but each time I've seen him he's been watching your son."

"Me?" I squeaked.

Tom started the engine.

"What about Agent Morris?" I asked.

"I lost him over on Rosalie, but I've already called in for the local police to offer backup."

"Oh great!" I said without thinking.

"What's that supposed to mean?" Mom asked.

"Just that Mary's dad is going to think I had something to do with that again. I already know he doesn't like me." I said.

"You couldn't be further from the truth." Tom said as we were speeding down Main Street and headed south.

"What do you mean?" I asked.

"He means that Officer Tucker likes you." Dad offered.

"What?" I asked loudly, "Have you seen the way he looks at me?"

"Well if it makes you happy to think that, then you go right ahead and think that." Tom said.

I crossed my arms and looked out the back window, while mom tried to comfort me, or was she looking to comfort herself.

Suddenly realizing which direction we were headed I asked, "Are we going downtown? Am I going to be staying with Jamie and Marsha?"

"Yes and no." Tom said.

"Uh, you mean yes we are going downtown, but no I am not saying with Jamie?"

"Yes." Tom said.

"UUGGGHHH! Then where are we going?" I asked.

"Son," Dad finally said, "Why don't you try to be quiet for a while? We'll be, to where we are going, soon and then you'll know."

I sat quietly for a while, but then I had a thought and it came out of my mouth with no regard for the reaction I would get from it.

"Hey dad, do you think maybe what I'd seen in that bush yesterday evening at Lowell's could have been that guy in the sweatshirt watching me?"

With a screech of tires the SUV skidded to a stop. Tom slammed the gear shifter into park and turned in his seat, "What are you talking about?"

"Oops! Guess we forgot to tell you about that." Dad said and then mom jumped in to tell Tom all about what had happened last night.

"Damnit! I need to know these things." Tom cussed as he turned back around and pulled his phone from his pocket.

"Tom here. We're going to have to go with your backup plan."

"Yes that's right; the Vandoan place has been compromised."

Tom flipped his phone closed so violently that he snapped the whole thing in half.

"Son of a...", but he didn't finish. Instead he threw the phone into the cup holder.

After a moment I asked, "So we weren't really going downtown after all?"

Tom chuckled, "Yes we were, but only because we were meeting the Vandoan's down there. They were going to take you back to their place to stay, but apparently," he looked at dad as he said, "Who ever is messing with you and following you knows to look for you there."

Flustered I said, "Then take me back to my sh...."

I pounded my fist against the seat when I was yet again unable to say ship.

"No, I'm taking you to stay with your father."

"What?" Mom asked.

"You're taking me home?"

"You son of a bitch!" dad shouted.

"The boy already knows!" Tom said.

"You do?" mom and dad said at the same time.

"What do I know?" I asked.

"That you're adopted." Tom said.

"Oh effing heck." Except I really said both words and not because of finding out I was adopted, I already knew that, but because I wasn't ready for it to be known that I knew.

"Yeah that's right!" I shouted at everyone, "I said it and I'm not sorry!"

"How long have you known?" Mom asked.

"Since right before I left." I said and then addressing Tom I said, "How did you know I knew? And for that matter, how did you know about it?"

"It's what I do. Now you three need to deal with it and stop playing games with all these secrets!" Tom said angrily. "I've never seen a family with more secrets in all my years at the agency! For the love of God! You people are why I don't sleep at night!"

Tom started driving again only now he was grumbling and every so often we could actually make out a word or two.

I leaned over to mom and whispered, "I think Tom's gone cuckoo."

But when I looked up at her mom was quietly crying.

"It's ok mom. I promise I still love you and dad. Actually I love you guys more knowing." I said.

Mom hugged me so tightly for the rest of our journey.

After a long silence dad asked, "Why do you think Simon will be any safer at Ian's?"

Tom looked out the driver's side window, then back to the road ahead.

"You met his new Significant Other right?" Tom asked.

Mom answered with, "Colin? He's a lovely man."

"He is also my unofficial nephew from my brother's side and someone I would trust with my life." Tom said.

"You've got a brother?" I asked.

Tom looked at me via the rearview mirror and said, "Had."

I instantly felt bad and uttered an apologetic, "Oh".


We pulled into the parking garage of my brothers building and began to drive up and up and up to the third level.

"Simon," mom said to me the last of like a zillions times before I stepped out the door on the drivers side. "You don't have to do this."

My mom is a lot like me. She is strong, but she cries a lot more than I do. Or at least I like to think I don't shed as many tears as she does. I felt a spasm of panic as I stared at her wide, glistening eyes. How could I leave my loving, erratic, clean-freak mother again? Of course she still has my dad so she should be fine. And besides, it is only for a few days right?

"I want to go," I lied. I don't know if I have always been a bad liar, but I think in the past year or so I have gotten better at it to the point that I almost believed that I wanted to go.

"Tell your brother I said I love him." Mom said.

"I will."

"You won't be seeing your brother." Tom said sharply, "No one is to know you're here."

"Wanna bet?" I said to him.

"Simon, this isn't a game!" Tom snapped.

With determination I shouted, "Listen, if that old fat cow Madam-M couldn't keep us apart, then what chance have you got to keep me from seeing my brother?"

Dad stepped between us and calmed us both down.

Mom hugged me and said, "We'll come over to see you soon."

"We're only a phone call away if you need anything." Dad said.

"No! No phone calls to anyone. Calls can be traced." Tom said, "If you want anything, ask Colin or your father."

"Do you have to keep calling him that?" Mom asked angrily.

"Sorry," Tom apologized.

Mom tried to hug me again, but dad, while wrapping both arms around her middle from behind and resting his head against hers, said, "Don't worry about the boy. He'll be fine and back home in no time. And besides, he'll get to drive someone else crazy for a while instead of us."

"DAD!" I griped at the slam against my character.

"Do you need changed before you go?" Mom asked.

"Mom!" I whined at her attempt to delay my departure.

"Oh, alright then." She finally surrendered.

"Love you both." I said and tried to slip away with Tom, but I was caught, pulled back in and received a four armed hug.

When we finally arrived downtown, it was raining. I didn't see it as an omen just unavoidable. I'd already said my farewells to the big yellow ball in the sky. You see, Tom had told me that (whatever Jamie's building is called), I was to make no phone calls to anyone. Tom had arranged for me to go off the grid for a while until they managed to find out what the heck was going on back home. That meant no phone calls to anyone, my probation officer included and I wasn't to call that dang tracking number. Tom took the opportunity, as we were walking in alone, to remind me, that for the next few days I was in all respects `in hiding' and under no circumstances was I to step foot outside of the building.

I looked up at Tom who had a death grip on my left hand, as though I were a toddler he was trying to keep hold of. We were alone now and I took the opportunity to ask him if he was going to accept my offer from before.

"Are you going to kill Mort for me?"

Tom stopped dead, turned and slapped me across the face and I do mean hard. My cheek burned from the slap, as tears welled up in my eyes.

"Listen here you little shit! You've been through a lot, I give you that much, but if I ever hear you talking like that again, even in jest, I'll beat your ass myself!"

I don't remember thinking about what I did next, I just did it. I'd balled up my right fist and let go a swing, but Tom had been expecting that. He caught my hand and slapped me hard again.

In a voice not unlike my dads he said sternly, "Now just stop it!"

It was taking everything I had in me to keep from crying, as I watched Tom rub his face to try to regain control of his emotions.

He knelt before me and softly said, "Listen, I'll look into the matter. You know I will do that much, but you've got to find a way, and only you can do this, to let go of the anger, just like you have for Runt."

"What makes you think I don't still hate Runt?" I asked while barely keeping my emotions in check.

"I didn't say you have to stop hating, just let go of the anger." He placed a hand on my shoulder and said, "Now no more games or deals. You need to tell me where the Banachelli is and where the money is. And I need to know what is going on with you!"

I straightened up, pulled my shoulder free from Tom's touch and said, "I love you Tom, but I love my other family too and I'm not going to betray them without a good enough reason."

Tom sighed, "And Mort dead, is a good enough reason?"

Oh that one hurt. I was physically stunned by that one.

I held out my hand to him like I was expecting something from him.

"What?" he asked.

"Give me your phone."

He eyed me a moment before reluctantly saying, "My phone is dead, remember."

"You don't carry a backup phone?" I asked, "What kind of spy are you?"

Tom tried to insert his one brand of humor by saying, "I'm not any kind of spy. I'm an overpaid babysitter."

But he did have a second phone on him.

"I was going to give you this," he paused and dangled it before me, "BUT," and that was a very strong but too, "this is ONLY for emergencies. This is not a toy and not for chatting with your playmates."

"Cool! My own cell phone." I said, as I tried to take it from him, but he was faster than me.

"It isn't a cell phone, it's a satellite phone."

"And I suppose it has a bug in it so you and the FBI can listen to everything I say on it?" I asked both, joking and serious.

"Oh well, that would have been a good idea. Wish I had thought of that." Tom said.

"Yeah, right." I quipped as I snagged the phone from him.

"What's the date?" I asked.

Tom looked at his watch before telling me the time.

"I didn't ask what time it is." I said teasingly.

"Yes, but you were about too." He said and then said the date.

"How'd you know that?" I asked.

"Because I'm Thomas Segal."

I thought for a minute and then dialed a number.

There were two rings and then a beep followed by, "Where the hell have you been boy?"

I chuckled, "Hiya Fyer."

"Are you alright?" he asked.

"Yeah I'm good, but this isn't a happy-happy call."


"Yeah, I'm here with Tom..."

I didn't get to finish my thought `cause Fyer shouted into my ear, "THAT OLD BAG OF BONES IS STILL BOTHERING YOU?"

Tom heard that one and tried to snatch the phone from me, but I stepped back and told him to, "Be patient."

"Yeah he is still bothering me, but I'm making a deal with him." I said into the phone.

"Oh my boy that isn't wise." Fyer said.

"Yeah well, since when have I ever done anything that was smart?" I asked.

That made Fyer laugh and Tom smile.

"Listen, how much is left of the money?" I asked.

"We've not had a chance to put plans into action yet. We've had complications, so nearly all of it. Why? Oh Simon don't tell me you're going to give it back?" Fyer said with more disappointment in his voice then I thought I could handle.

"Yeah well, it's like Tom said, it's time to stop playing games."

"Well son, if that is what you think is best, we've been making due without it up till now; we can keep on keeping on."

"I was hoping you'd say that and besides I have a feeling something will come up." I said.

"OK, here's Tom." And with that I handed the phone to Tom who talked only for a minute or two with Fyer before ending the call and giving me back the phone.

"I suppose, now that you're getting the money, you'll be leaving me and get a new assignment." I said without looking at Tom.

"Simon, look at me." He said, "What do you see?"

"You." I said.

"Yeah well, everyone else sees a broken, scared and beat man. The only reason I'm still in the FBI is, because I called in a couple favors to allow me to stay on long enough to wrap up things. Once the money has been returned I'll be medically discharged. When that happens, I'll be free to do as I please. And it pleases me to make sure you are safe. If that takes me the rest of my life, then I'll be right here for you."

I smiled at that and hugged him.

"But what about the Banachelli and everyone back there?" I asked.

Tom pushed me away, but held me at arms length. He was looking at me rather oddly.

"What?" I asked.

"What did you just ask me?" he asked.

"What about everyone on the Banachelli? What's going to happen to them, now that they won't have the money to buy food or live without stealing?"

"Say that first part again." Tom instructed.

"What?" I asked, not understanding what he meant.

"Didn't you hear what you just said?"

I didn't get it so Tom helped me get it, "Where does Fyer live?"

"On the Banachelli?" I answered quizzically.

"And where do those kids call home?" he asked.

"TOM?! What?" I asked with frustration.

"Not ten minutes ago, you weren't able to say that name or even refer to it, but now you've said it twice."

I looked down at my hands; don't ask me why, I just did. I started out soft, but built as I got more and more excited, "Banachelli. BanaCHELLI! BANACHELLI! I SAID IT!"

Tom did that thoughtful chin rub thing he does before saying, "Must have been the guilt."


Tom smiled, "Guilt is a very heavy burden to bear."

"Oh, yeah." I agreed.

"And like you said, I'm sure something will come up for Fyer and those boys." Tom said.

"And don't forget about Cho and Sister Sarafina."

Tom almost smiled as he said, "Yes, them too."


Right then we heard the freight elevator come to life and Tom announced, "Here comes your ride."

I'm not sure why, what I said next came out sounding so sheepish, but it did. "Can I ask one small favor at least?"

"No!" he said adamantly, but then softened as he asked, "What is it?"

I told Tom about the run in I had to Coach Shaffer's son Hank and what Hank had said to me. I then asked Tom to look into it, just to be sure Hanks little sister was ok.

He studied me for a time before finally saying, "I'll see what I can do."


I wasn't surprised when the freight elevator doors opened and out stepped Ian and his new husband Colin. However I was surprised that both were wearing matching bathrobes and slippers

"You'll be staying with us." Ian said, while almost floating off the floor with excitement.

"Easy there Dorothy!" Colin said to Ian.

I didn't get the meaning, but I guess Ian did `cause he gave Colin an elbow. Then again, it was so weak it wouldn't have diverted a fly from its flight path.

"Quiet you!" Ian said to Colin.

Colin took my bags from Tom, who told me to go with Colin, while he talked to Ian for a moment. I'll mention that Tom didn't let go of my hand and let me walk away on my own. With purpose and determination he took my hand and placed it into Colins and did not release his grip on my forearm until he saw that Colin had a firm hold of my hand.

I stepped into the freight elevator with Colin, stopped, turned and asked, "Do Jamie and Marsha know I am here?"

"Absolutely not and they are not to know you are staying in the building." Tom said with an authoritative finger pointed at me.

"What about Noah, Paul and Vanessa?" I asked.

Tom studied me for a minute, pulled a handkerchief from his pocket and wiped his face. He then looked at Ian, but I didn't hear what was said, `cause the dang elevator doors closed.


"You'll be staying up there." Colin said while pointing up to a loft area at the top of a long metal ladder. No kidding, I had to climb a ladder to get to bed. OK it wasn't a ladder like construction workers use, but it wasn't a set of stairs either.

"You can check it out if you like. I'll be right there. I need to grab something first."

I think I was halfway up the ladder before my faith in it strengthened. To look at it, it doesn't look to substantial, but in fact it was quite sturdy and easy to climb.

Upon reaching the top, I found that the loft was a lot bigger than it looked from below. Actually it was about half the size of the apartment's first floor. There was a large bed, bigger than anything I had ever slept in, a dresser of sorts with whicker baskets for drawers, a low and long set of shelves decorated with blue glass vases and a small television set.

"Hummm, no computer." I thought to myself.

From the far side of the loft Colin asked, "What do you think of it?"

I nearly jumped out of the skin, he startled me that badly.

"How'd you get up here?" I asked with both hands over my heart.

He pointed to what I mistook to be a closet.

"It looks like a closet, but it's really a small elevator." He said.

I went over and sat down on the edge of the bed.

"I can't believe so much has happened today and it isn't even ten o'clock yet." I said before laying my face in my hands.

That was the last thing I remember `cause I fell asleep. I hadn't even realized how emotionally and physically exhausted I'd become.



Note from the Author: If you have enjoyed this chapter I would very much like to hear from you and your thoughts on it as well as the full story. You can email me at