Date: Wed, 07 Jun 2000 07:04:11 EDT From: William Watts Subject: A Tragic Love - chapter 11 Legal Notice: The following story contains descriptions of graphic sexual acts. The story is a work of fiction and has no basis in reality. Don't read this story if: **You're not 18 or over, **If it is illegal to read this type of material where you live, **Or if you don't want to read about gay/bi people in love or having sex. The author retains copyright to this story. Placing this story on a website or reproducing this story for distribution without the author's permission is a violation of that copyright. Legal action will be taken against violators. If you have enjoyed reading this story, you will find other stories by me at http://www.teenboyauthors.org/thewolf/, in the 'Other Stories' section. E-mail responses to the stories, story suggestions or other 'constructive' comments or advice may be sent to: bwstories44@hotmail.com. * * * * * * * * A Tragic Love - by BW (Young-Friends). Copyright 2000 by bwstories44 Chapter 11 - The inferno. January 2000 "So you're the new, little, cock sucker that's been assigned here." I spun to see who said those malicious words only to see the new guard looking at me smiling. "Well, what have you got to say for yourself? I hear you like to mess around with other boys." He paused and looked me over before he continued. "If that's the case, you've sure come to the right place. You'll like it here, then, with all of these other boys and they'll sure like having a new butt buddy around to entertain them." I was stunned that he would announce this in front of all of the other boys. My God. Was he setting me up to get the crap beat out of me or what? I couldn't and didn't respond. I just worked my way over to a bookcase on the far wall, pulled a book from the shelf and pretended to read it. I tried, desperately, not to look at any of the others. After what seemed like forever, we were told to line up and we were led out of the game room and into a large dorm room, a row of cots going up along each wall. The guard guided me in and then pointed to the cot would be mine. He told me that the locker on the wall behind it would also be mine to use. It was the place where I could keep all of my personal things. He told me that my personal things would consist of my extra underwear and socks, soap and shampoo, toothbrush and toothpaste, writing materials, books and magazines, cards and games and a few other things that we were allowed to have. He said I would get a list later that would tell me everything that I would be allowed to keep. I understood, now, that this guard was assigned to this group of boys, who all were housed together in this large dorm room. I moved over to my cot and lie down on top of it, hoping that the others would forget about all of the things that this guard had said to me when I first joined them. I didn't even dare to look at any of them, for fear they would think I was making a pass at them and cause them to start pounding on me. Let's face it. Most of the boys appeared to be older and bigger than me and they could probably hurt me really bad. The guard went over and sat at a desk near the door and the rest of the boys started to break into groups to talk. Suddenly, this bigger guy came over to my cot and gave me a big, toothy grin. "Don't worry, bitch," the boy began, "we're going to take good care of you here and you're going to have all the cock you want." I was afraid but I decided that I should probably act tough. "Look, just leave me alone. I don't plan on bothering anyone here and I don't want to be bothered by any of you so fuck off." "You don't have to worry about that, sweetie. You'll be fucked off any time you want." He just started laughing and then he walked away. Eventually, he joined another group of boys on the other side of the room and they kept glancing over at me and laughing. My mind kept racing over everything that had happened to me so far, as I lie on my cot and looked, not focusing, at the ceiling. My first hope was that the guards would protect me but, after what this one guard had said, I wasn't optimistic. I stayed that way until I heard the guard tell us to line up for lunch. I got in the line, behind a couple of other boys, and waited for the door to open. As I stood there, I felt someone behind me take his finger and try to shove it up my ass, through the uniform. I turned around to see the boy who had approached me earlier with another big grin on his face. Fortunately, the door opened and we headed off for our meal. We were led to a cafeteria that was similar to a school cafeteria except for the fact that there was a guard at each end of the line. We were handed a tray, which we pushed down the line, stopping every so often to get our food. We would get a hunk of this here and a spoonful of that there. Just at that moment a spoonful of some unrecognizable food was slapped on my tray by another young inmate who was working on the other side of the counter. At the end of line, I grabbed a carton of milk, a straw, a napkin and a spoon and headed toward a table. That boy, who bothered me earlier, and a few of his friends sat at my table and kept making kissing noises and were sliding one of their fingers in and out of their other fist. I had a good idea what that meant. This just kept getting worse and worse. The rest of the day went about the same once we got back to the dorm. Dinnertime proved to be almost identical to lunchtime and then we went back to our dorm for the evening. It looked like we only got to go to that game room once a day. When we came back from dinner, there was a new guard with us. There must have been a change of shifts, and I hoped that this guy would be better than the last. At 8:30 he announced that it was time to get ready for bed. It would be lights out in a half an hour. We all washed up and brushed our teeth in the communal bathroom, went back to our cots, stripped to our underwear and slipped under the blanket and sheet. Day number one was almost over, only 364 more to go. Lights went out promptly at nine o'clock and the guard sat at his desk, with only a little lamp to give him light. Some time later I heard him unlock the door and leave the room. He must have figured we were all asleep now. I started to hear some shuffling noises in the dorm but I didn't dare open my eyes to see what was going on. I decided it was best if I pretended to be asleep. Without warning, my covers were thrown back off of my body and I felt several pairs of hands grasped a hold of me. I was forced to get up on all fours on my cot and then a boy came in front of me, yanked on my hair, pulled my head up and shoved his semi hard cock in my face. "You better suck this boy and suck it good if you don't want to get hurt." I knew he meant it but I didn't comply. He slapped my face and yanked my hair again. "Open up, cock sucker, and do me or you won't ever be able to do anyone ever again." Hesitantly, I opened my mouth and he started to force his penis down my throat. I just stayed there, not participating, as he fucked my face with his now hard tool. I was letting my mind drift, trying not to concentrate on what was happening, when I felt someone pull my briefs down. Then I could tell that someone was getting on the cot behind me. Suddenly, someone drove his stiff meat up my ass. He did it without any warning, no stretching and no lubrication. I felt the pain from my rectum being dry fucked and this burning sensation caused tears to stream down my face. I knew, without looking, that it was the boy who had taunted me earlier who had just entered me. After these two had dumped their loads into me, two more took their place. At least I was lubed for the second guy, even if it was only with the first guy's cum that was leaking out my hole and running down the insides of my legs. All twenty guys must have done me, in the ass or in my mouth, before I was allowed to lie back down on my cot and go to sleep. I lie there stretched out on my stomach in pain, with a hollow and empty feeling consuming me as I thought about what had been done to me. I was silently weeping about the horrid, disgusting acts that had been performed upon me trying hard to keep the others from seeing my pain and thinking me weak. Yes, you heard me correctly! Those were horrid and disgusting acts that I had been forced to endure. There was no love, no affection and no tenderness like I had always felt with David. This was just raw, animalistic sex. Lust satisfied by an unwillingly participant. Now, I understood how others could think that these acts were so vulgar and unnatural. That was because, without love, they really were. I guess that could also be said about sex between a man and a woman too. Any of those acts, by themselves, could appear to be just as disgusting if you just concentrated on the purely physical sense of what was being done. It was the love and affection that was shared between the two partners that made these acts wonderful and special. The next morning we were awakened at six. I was so sore that I could hardly stand, let alone walk. I saw that everyone else was stripping down, wrapping their towels around their waists and holding onto the rest of their necessary items. Once they had their toiletries in hand, they stood in front of their cots and, I surmised, waited to line up for the showers. I knew that I had to do the same so I removed my clothes and mimicked their behavior. I heard some snickering as I lowered my briefs and I assumed that my red, raw ass must have appeared quite amusing to those who had raped me the previous evening. We were soon told to line up and we all followed the guard to the shower area. We went in and began to lather up. It was one large shower room, like in school, and I went to a corner shower and tried to clean up facing into the wall. "Hey, bitch. Do you want to see the man meat that gave you so much pleasure last night." I didn't move or respond. "Oh, look guys. Our little whore is really quite shy. Maybe he's just pissed that we didn't get him off while we were doing him. Is that it bitch?" I still didn't move or respond. "Come on. Look around and see all these sweet dicks that are all yours for the asking. We know you liked them and that you want more. You know you want them, too, so you might as well check them out. Come on, sweet cheeks, you don't have to be such a cold bitch. I just stood there trying to ignore them. I wondered how long this was going to go on. I was totally alone here and there was no one around to protect me if they decided to do anything else. Even when I had finished showering, I stood there pretending to continue to clean up until everyone else left the room. My new 'friend' gave me one more parting shot before he left. "Better get used to it, bitch. You're going to get it tonight and every night thereafter, as long as you're here in our dorm." Great. Now I had to look forward to getting raped and gang banged every night for a year. I guess that it couldn't get better than this, now could it? How in the hell was I going to survive a year here in this hellhole? I don't think that even Dante's description of hell was as bad as this was. We went back to our dorm and I soon fell into the steady pattern that was to be my life for the next year. No thought or enjoyment required. The only part of the day I started to enjoy was when we took classes. Yes, they had a school here and the teacher seemed to take an interest in me. I was bright and a good student. Learning new things, studying and reading took my mind away from the misery that was now my life. That guy had been right. Some time during each and every night I would be visited by a group of my dorm mates and forced into having sex with them. I didn't fight it any more and did it willingly, although I didn't enjoy one second of it. The number of participants changed each night and those who used me seemed to change each night as well. That was except for that one older guy who seemed to get an extra kick out of humiliating me. He was released from the center the following October but things stayed pretty much the same even with him gone. By August, the others started to take me for granted and they left me alone during the day. It was about that time when a new boy was brought into the dorm. From the day he arrived, he seemed to gravitate toward me and he picked me out to be his friend. He was about my age, though a little smaller, and I could tell that he was just as scared as I had been when I first arrived. He had red hair and blue eyes, which I thought was a strange looking combination, but he seemed like a nice kid and I decided to give him a break. "Hi, I'm Billy. What's your name?" "Justin." "How long are you here for?" "Six months." "Well, you'll be out before me then." At that he smiled. We didn't ask each other what we were in here for. I guess that we both knew it would be easier if we just didn't know what the other had been sentenced for. I mean, what the hell. We were both there and both of us needed someone to help make our stay more bearable so why shouldn't we try to do what we could. After about a week, Justin decided to ask me a question. "Why do the other boys do those things to you at night?" I looked him in the eye, unsure about how much I should tell him, but I decided to be honest, even if it cost me my one and only friend in this joint. "Justin, I'm gay. One of the reasons I'm in here is because my lover's father caught us having sex. The first day I was here one of the guards announced this fact in front of all of the other boys and I have had those nightly visits ever since. I don't enjoy it but I'll understand it if you don't want to hang around me any more." I started to walk away when Justin clutched my arm. "I don't mind, really. I think you're nice. I don't mind being your friend." I smiled at him and sat back down on his cot beside him. "Thanks. I'll try to make sure that you don't regret that decision." He smiled at me and we started to talk about other things. Justin was a real good friend to me until he left, shortly after my birthday in February. If it hadn't been for him, I don't think I could have gotten through several specific days, like September 2nd (David's and my anniversary), Columbus Day, Thanksgiving, Christmas and David's and my birthdays. He seemed to understand how much I loved David although he said he didn't think he was gay. Justin was able to comfort me when I became depressed, especially on those dark days from my past that triggered so many memories. He even met my mom when Mr. Shay drove her out here to visit me for Christmas. Except for one other visit from Mr. Shay, that was the only visit I ever got. Justin never participated in the nightly visits to my cot. I once told him that he could if he needed to get his rocks off but he told me that he could never do that to me unless he could do it in a loving way. I appreciated that and I told him so. I just can't explain what that meant to me. We never did do anything together while we were both there but his understanding and compassion about what I had to endure did more for me than any love making session with him could have provided. Even though I knew he wasn't gay, I still found myself loving and wanting him. Not as much as David but my feeling for him proved to be an excellent substitute while my lover and I were parted. Justin was also pretty good in school so we sat next to each other in class and became study partners. We helped each other when we had problems and we did a couple of research projects together. Don't get me wrong. This place was still hell except that Justin gave me a ray of sunlight to cling to somewhere in that dark, bottomless void. As Justin's release date neared, I started to fall back into my depression. He told me the he lived about three hours away but in the other direction from the center. I knew that we'd probably never see each other again once he was released. Beginning on the morning that he left, I wept the whole day while lying on my cot. I didn't cry for Justin, either. Those tears were shed for me alone and for the loneliness that was once again mine to bear in solitude. It felt as if I had lost David all over again, only that I just loved Justin as a special friend and I didn't love him the same way or as deeply as I did David. For the rest of my stay, I had no one to talk to, no one to be close to and no one for whom I cared about. I pulled into a shell and I vowed that I wouldn't get that close to any one else or allow any one get that close to me again, for as long as I was there. It just hurt too much when they were gone and I didn't want to hurt any one else like that when I left. So, now, I was totally alone and on my own. I mentioned earlier that I had had another visit from Mr. Shay and that one came in late May, just before I was to get out. He showed up one day and we met in a conference room. "Billy, you know your going to be getting out of here soon and I wanted to come and let you know what was going to happen next. I met with the judge just the other day to discuss your release. We both met with your mother at that time. She told us that your grandfather hadn't changed his mind and there was no way she could afford to move out and take you in. I'm sorry but your going to be placed into foster care." I sat there emotionless. I guess I sort of expected this. What difference would it make? It had to be better than this. "Your mother didn't want to come with me because she said she couldn't face you after letting you down like this. Billy, she's hurting about this too. She is filled with all kinds of guilt about this whole thing and she blames herself for most of it. She loves you, Billy, so don't think that she doesn't but this has been hard on her too. He didn't have to say this. I didn't hate my mother. I knew that, down deep, she loved me and I loved her. I guess I know what it's like to feel responsible for someone else's problems and to blame yourself for them. I told Mr. Shay to tell her that I understood and that I still loved her. "The foster home is going to be in a different town from where you lived. The judge thought this might be easier for you to adjust back into a normal life, you know not having to deal with seeing people from your old school. I offered to pick you up when you were released and take you to your foster home and introduce you to your foster family. Your mother is going to send your things with me at that time so you'll have them in your new home. I started to thank Mr. Shay for everything he had done for me but he told me that he wasn't quite done yet. "A few weeks ago I got a letter in the mail. Inside there was a second letter in another envelope and I was asked if I would give this letter to you. It's from your friend David." I ripped the letter from his hand as he handed it across the table. I tore it open, unfolded the paper and began to read. Dear Billy, Please don't hate me for not helping you and for not coming to see you. I still love you and I'm sorry about everything that has happened. My dad made me say that you stole my bike so he could keep us apart. I didn't want to do it but he said that if I didn't he'd find a way to make sure you got sent away for something even worse. I'm sorry that I didn't get in touch with you earlier but my dad hired this old guy to watch over me all of the time. He even lives in the house and he has the bedroom closest to mine. The only way I could get this letter to you was by talking one of my teachers into mailing it for me. I miss you so much and I've been so lonely. It's like I'm in prison in my own house. Billy, I love you, I love everything about you and I loved every minute we were together. I'm hoping we can find a way to get together again once you get out. You'll have to try to find a way to let me know where your going to be after you get out so we can make plans to get together. I heard about your grandfather and I'm sorry about that too. I love you Billy, now and forever, and I hold my charms close to my heart every day to remind me of you. Billy, please get in touch with me as soon as you can. I need you and I want to feel your soft body, your sweet kisses and your gentle touch again. I love you Billy and I hope, with all my heart, that you still love me the same way you did before all of this happened. With all my love to my special angel, David I folded the letter and put it in my pocket. Mr. Shay handed me his handkerchief because I was crying the whole time that I was reading it. He gave me time to compose myself before he said goodbye and signaled the guard to take me back to my dorm. * * * * * * * * If you have enjoyed reading this story, you will find other stories by me at http://www.teenboyauthors.org/thewolf/, in the 'Other Stories' section. E-mails may be sent to: bwstories44@hotmail.com.