Are You Scared Yet

Chapter Nineteen

My first surprise Monday was at the bank. I hadn't said how much I needed, because I wasn't sure. It's not like I'd ever paid for gas, nor had I ever worried about meal money beyond a day, but I was guessing four or five hundred. She sent a thousand. So even if from Vegas to Seattle and then on to Vancouver ended up being two thousand five hundred miles, Elliott got around 20 mpg, so at... say, $2.50 a gallon... except we'd heard it was higher in California... so okay, even at $3 a gallon, it would still be only about $375. And we'd be camping out a lot. So that only left food to worry about, and Carlie and Earl were assuring us that they could cook all sorts of things over a camp fire... except we'd still be wanting some fast food every now and then, but with $1000 along with what we already had...

“I think we're in good shape here,” I said.

It sure seemed that way. Carlie already had all sorts of camping equipment, so all Stephan and I needed was a two man tent and we found one at Wal-Mart. Supposedly, even an idiot could put it up in about ninety seconds. (Elliott had a sleeping bag and he said the cargo area of his Chevy Cavalier was comfortable enough.)

Well, all right, we also needed an extra large sleeping bag. We ended up with two, in case we ever discovered that we were trying to sleep on rocks.

Wal-Mart didn't have any i-Kam video recording glasses, though. We'd seen them on line the night before. They look just like sun glasses, but...

Well, I could imagine all sorts of possibilities, but I guessed I could wait until we found a big outfitting store in either in Salt Lake or Vegas.

Then, once back in Oxmar, the second surprise came right after finding the Squirrel Evictor along with our rabbit ears and tails on the front porch. The surprise wasn't that they'd arrived, though, it was the timing. We would have preferred them being delivered when no one else was around, because after going to the trouble of covering all the holes, of course Carlie and Earl wanted to see the Evictor in action. They wanted to see that 175,000 candle power, high-intensity strobe light pulsing 92 times a minute, and we all agreed that it's a bothersome thing, but they also spotted our rabbit costumes. The boxes were next to the only electrical outlet up there, and not only that, one of our Franks had his head out of the box. We were such good planners, Stephan and I, but the thing was, we were expecting some resistance from Carlie and Elliott.

Well, Elliott was still downstairs because he'd had quite enough of the attic, so we still didn't know about him, but Carlie exclaimed, “Is that what I think it is? How many of these do you have? Are there enough for all of us?”

So he'd reacted favorably, but Earl's initial reaction wasn't so favorable, because he thought the Bugs Bunny costumes looked silly. Although he liked our Frank the Bunny costumes.

So the next surprise was how quickly we could be convinced to take turns. Even if it shouldn't be. What were we supposed to say? “Those Franks cost a lot more and we bought them just for ourselves?” Of course we couldn't say that.

No, Stephan said, “Well, we'll take turns then. Everybody gets to be Frank for at least awhile, but... want to surprise Elliott? Me and Natty, we'll be Franks... just for now, all right? ... So that means you'll both be Bugs Bunnies... this time... So you want to?”

And one thing about a 175,000 candle power, high-intensity strobe light pulsing 92 times a minute is that you want to get away from it as soon as possible. Even with our backs turned, it was bothering us. So first Elliott saw our clothes being tossed down and naturally, he wondered what we were up to.

You're about to find out,” said Carlie hurriedly, and about a minute later...

“Oh... my... God,” said Elliott. Then he started laughing. Only then we gathered around him, with our fixed expressions. Then Earl tossed the third Bugs Bunny costume his way and in a muffled voice said, “That's yours.”

“The hell you say,” replied Elliott, but he said it cheerfully enough and beyond that, there were four of us and only one of him, so in no time at all he was naked from the neck down. His shorts were gone and his shirt was up over his head. Only that led to some more surprises.

First, the jump suit part of those Bugs Bunny costumes weren't designed with wedgies in mind, so when Elliott started trying to give one to Earl, disaster struck.

It was amazing. Elliott's stronger than he looks, but not so surprisingly, he started apologizing. He kept saying that he hadn't meant to shred Earl's costume. I wish I'd caught it on my camcorder, because first Earl yanked his jump suit off, then he held it up in front of him, then he yanked his head off and started glaring at Elliott.

Honest, I didn't mean to,” said Elliott for the fourth or fifth time, “I swear I didn't.”

So finally Earl shrugged and said, “Well, it's all right, because I have something even better.”

Then he resolutely jammed his head back on and up the stairs he went. (So now the rest of us were thinking about how interesting it would be to only be dressed like a rabbit from the neck up.)

But two of us, (Stephan and I), weren't thinking about wearing pink long johns. As long as our plush gray and white coveralls weren't subjected to wedgies, we were happy to stay just as we were. Even if, on the other hand, we liked Earl better in his pink long johns. The jump suit wasn't form-fitting. Unless you were being wedgied, of course, then it was. And that was even before it started ripping.

So I didn't say anything, but I decided right then that the jump suits looked fairly dumb unless I had my camcorder. ... Or my soon-to-be-purchased i-KAM video recording glasses, but...

Unexpected exposure was still in the future, so back to that afternoon when Earl came bouncing back downstairs in pink long johns and his floppy rabbit ears and announced, “If I had a tail, I'd be back in business again!”

So no problem. They'd have to be sewn on, but still...

For the record, though, neither Earl or Carlie were thinking about wearing pink long johns and rabbit ears until they saw our costumes. And to further explain, the only reason Earl had four pairs was because his grandpa forgot about mixing colors in the wash. It happened about a year before, so that explains the tight fits. Carlie's were especially tight. But when they finally talked Elliott into a pair...

It was a sight. But how did they talk him into it, that's the question.

First, as we were still adjusting to their pink long johns, Carlie remarked to Elliott, “You need to shave yourself again. You're getting stubbly. Just barely, but you are.”

So Elliott blushed, but replied, “It irritates my skin. I think some places aren't meant to be shaved.”

Carlie was unmoved. “You promised you would. Until we get to Seattle. ... And besides, in a day or two it'll be even more stubbly, and it'll start itching, I bet.”

Then he explained, “We're making him do it.”

Only because I'm letting you,” started Elliott.

But Bag Balm would help, I bet.” And that was Carlie again, but now his voice was sounding just a little funny and I also noticed that he was getting hard again.

Probably because of what he added right after that. “We'll all spread it on. So all you have to do is get on the quilt, lay back and enjoy it. ... But first, we'll shave you again, all right?”

Elliott looked very very doubtful, and after a pregnant pause: “I think...” (then he started blushing even more than before), but finished, “I'd feel a lot safer if I do the shaving part myself,” and, hurriedly, he was gone. Upstairs, to touch himself up I guessed, but I also noticed that he'd popped one too!

So I'm not sure if this qualifies as one of those universal truths or not, but with kinkyness once again in the air, the rest of us started getting hard as well. It's contagious.


I suppose when you get down to it, Carlie and Elliott's behavior was kinky only because they thought it was. But I said it myself: at first I thought the idea of shaving your pubes off was weird. Only it wasn't long until I got used to it. As long as it was him and not me or Stephan, of course... and I'd definitely hate to see Carlie without his... but different strokes for different folks, so then it wasn't so kinky. But apparently he still thought it was a little, so admitting that he was keeping himself that way because Carlie and Earl wanted him to is... well, it's strange. And admitting that you're strange makes it stranger still, especially if you're blushing. Why, that's almost exhibitionistic!

And furthermore, Carlie wanting to shave Elliott's personal places was...

Well, actually, all at once, I thought that was an interesting prospect. After all, who am I to cast the first stone? Didn't I let Carlie and Earl tie me up, spread-eagled and naked? I did. And I popped a boner, so obviously I thought it was gloriously wicked... and also downright kinky...

Although I'd like to point out that if I'd had an orgasm right after they left me that way, I would have kept it myself. And if you think about it, that's interesting too. It would have been perfectly all right for Carlie and Earl to give me one – I was rather expecting it, in fact – but I couldn't possibly admit to being so excited I had one without even touching it. And I didn't – by the way – but had that been the case, then why would I want to keep it a secret?

It's hard to say, really. I mean, I'm still working on it, but at any rate, when Elliott came back downstairs after touching himself up he didn't have a hint of an erection.

I wasn't going to ask, though. I didn't know if Carlie or Earl were or not, but if they were, they never got around to it because (blushingly): “I um, lost it. I was trying to get it in the right position and there it went, just like that.”

So at first none of us less sophisticated perverts knew how to respond to that. Not even Carlie, although a little later, once Elliott was on the quilt letting us to rub that goop everywhere – all four of us at the same time, and I do mean everywhere - Carlie asked, “So... you just pointed it... what direction did you point it, Elliott?”

By then Elliott was squirming and wiggling and purring, but he managed, “Um... well, I had it... oh boy... I had it... oooh! ... pointed away from me.”

Earl looked shocked. “You... squirted... all over my wall?

So we had to continue our enhanced interrogation for awhile longer, and before it was over, we'd all decided that in the near future, we'd like to be subjected to some of that as well. (He just did it on the floor though.) (And showing remarkable regenerative power, he did it again before we were finished with him, although the second was more subdued.) But you can find that little green can almost anywhere. At Walgreens, at Walmart...

That's how we talked Elliott into a pair of pink long johns, though. See, if you want the Bag Balm to soothe your irritated skin, it has to be left on for awhile. All night, for instance. But of course you need to put a bandage of some sort over it, else you'll be messing up your car seat. Only we didn't have a bandage that big – not exactly - but as long you had an old quilt to sit on, along with another underneath the first – then a pair of long johns would do just as well.

And of course there was also the fact that we were going to keep bugging him until he put those long johns on.

Although at first he kept taking his rabbit ears off. Finally, though, he had to agree that there was no reason for him to do that, because it was in the middle of the night and even when we were passing semis, (or when they were passing us), the driver couldn't see much of anything inside our car. And besides, in the middle of the night on I-94 in Montana, there's not much traffic anyway.


That was another surprise, leaving that evening. But Carlie said if we wanted to get a campsite in Yellowstone, we needed to be there early in the morning, that if we showed up late in the afternoon, we could almost forget about it. And this is funny in a way, but when we left, I felt a little nostalgic. I'd only been there a month, but Oxmar had started feeling like home. But John said I was welcome anytime I wanted to visit – and I'd better – so it wasn't long until I was very much into our new adventure.

Due to some practical considerations, though, there wasn't much in the way of performance art that night. Except for once. There was still some daylight left when we reached the state line, so we decided it would pretty cool if four of us were posing in front of the “Welcome To Montana” sign... and then acting fairly crazy in front of it. Then we raced back to the “Welcome To North Dakota – Discover The Spirit” sign and acted crazy some more. It wasn't difficult to act crazy because Carlie and Earl were in their Bugs Bunny suits – we still had two that were undamaged - and of course me and Stephan were in our full Frank the Bunny regalia. Elliott was behind the camcorder, because he said he wasn't about to pose under one of those signs in pink long johns, no way!

We were on Highway 12 and only two cars passed, both heading west. The second was pulling a travel trailer and apparently the old man driving was quite taken by our performance art, because about a hundred yards beyond us, he pulled over and got out with his camcorder. The old lady – I'm assuming it was his wife – stayed inside, and near as I could tell, she was afraid to look back. And I guess she was also telling her husband to please get back in the stupid car, because after about a minute, he did. And, of course, they then drove off.

So Elliott yelled, “Okay, show's over, so let's go!”

“We're not going anywhere until you run out here too!” yelled Carlie back.

“Yeah, I'll take over the camcorder,” I added. “It won't take but a minute.”

Only Elliott was still being stubborn. He wasn't about to. Not even when we started calling him a chicken.

“Well, all right then,” said Earl finally, “but I have to take a leak first. I'd wait until later on, but if you're going to keep acting that way, I will right out here,” and then, “Unzip my back, Carlie.”

So that brings up another practical consideration: our jump suits weren't equipped with flies. If you had to take a leak – or more than that – first you had to take your jump suit completely off.

So me and Stephan were getting nervous, especially after Carlie announced that he had to pee too. They were going to do it right under the “Welcome To Montana” sign.

Only Elliott still didn't believe they would. He should have known by the time their suits were down to their waists that they were, and Stephan had reached: “Um, do you think... you know, I really don't think this is a good idea...”

Then he trailed off as their suits dropped to their ankles. Then they stepped out of them because you can't run very fast otherwise. You'd almost certainly trip.

And then away they raced, butt naked except for their rabbit heads and...

Well, I didn't think it was a good idea either, so I raced to the car and yelled, “Elliott, will you please... let me have my camcorder. ... But just go, all right?”

Meanwhile, Carlie and Earl were running back and forth underneath “Welcome To Montana” while erratically pissing. I'd never tried to piss while running, and I wouldn't have thought it would be an easy thing to do, but Elliott finally came to his senses and with an “Oh shit!” away he went. Then once to the sign, he started yelling at Carlie and Earl. “Have you lost your minds?” And him in his pink long johns.

But the video was interesting, and we weren't arrested. (There were no more cars until everybody was safely back inside.)


Once it got dark there wasn't a reason to stay in our suits anyway, because unless we wanted to turn on the interior lights, no one could see inside. We could have been naked from the neck down, but no one would have known, not even the truckers in their tall cabs. Although we kept our heads on (or ears, in Elliott's case), and that might have caught someone's attention. Probably... especially right after we passed by someone, because then they could see the silhouettes. So it probably was startling.

But if you thought about it, it wouldn't be a good idea to get out in our rabbit suits at a rest stop and it would have been an even worse idea to stop for gas dressed that way. In the middle of the night, whoever was working inside the station would probably jump to some conclusions. Like, for example, that we were about to rob him. Why else would we be wearing masks? And not only that, he would probably think we were on drugs, so he'd probably start shooting. Five of us, one of him, bang, bang, not a problem. Except for us, of course.

So why didn't we think of that first? Because we thought we were going to be traveling on lonely state highways, not on the stupid Interstate, that's why. There was that along with the fact that we never ever thought about our jump suits not even having a fly...

And so in the end, we decided we could always dress up later, when the conditions were more favorable. Probably after we left Las Vegas. I mean, we were going to spend most of Tuesday and Wednesday at Yellowstone and Grand Teton. But late Wednesday afternoon, we'd take U.S. 26 over to I-15 and probably be in Vegas by the next morning. Carlie would be visiting his mom, then Friday, after visiting Buffalo Bill's, we'd be in California and at that point we'd start taking roads less traveled.

Although Friday would also be July 31st. The day before. Only our day would start at midnight.

So we did not want to get arrested or shot or both prior to then, and that is why when we reached the bridge over O'Fallon Creek (still on Highway 12), we decided it was time to help Elliott wash all that gook off so he could wear something besides long johns. I mean, obviously he could wear regular clothes without washing it off, but then his clothes would be gooky. And as it turned out, Bag Balm doesn't wash off that easy. It took awhile, and that creek was cold! But in the process of getting it all off, we gave him another awesome orgasm. So all I could say was that he sure seemed to be having a lot of them, but we think this time it had to do with becoming painfully erect in that cold water. And I know – or at least, I think I do – that cold water usually isn't conducive to feeling horny, but I'm thinking that Elliott might have a streak of masochism, and if you combine that with us rubbing on his dick and poking his hole... with our fingers, and all under the guise of cleanliness... or ungookyness... eventually he could do nothing but explode.

We were becoming perverted. Or possibly kinky.

Yeah, possibly, because we were erect as well. Once out of the water and dried off, we were. So Elliott took care of us. He blew every one of us.

So let's stick with perverted, then. Wonderfully so. We made him feel good, he made us feel good. Simple.


That night, I finally got the rest of Earl's dressing up like a bunny rabbit-story, how it started in the first place. And since it's fairly short and because some might still be wondering...

It came up because I was wondering if his original suit had a fly.

Well, it didn't, but the pants were separate from the rest of the costume, so all you had to do was pull down the front. Unless you wanted to sit, then you pulled down the back too... of course... but that led to my asking, “So okay, I have another question, then. Because until I found out I'd be in Seattle, for a little while, I was thinking about getting suspended the same way you did, only I couldn't see getting on the bus dressed that way, so the question is-”

“Well, shit, Natty. I just wore the suit underneath my clothes! I mean, I'm not that dumb... geez!”

“Oh.” I started giggling. “I have no idea why I didn't think of that. ... So once you were at school, you changed in a restroom, right?”

“No, in a phone booth. ... Sorry. Boy's restroom. Where else? ... But I was tempted to start pulling my regular clothes off in home room. Everybody would have been thinking, `What is he doing!??!'

“But I chickened out. ... On that part.”

“Yeah, but when you walked back in-”

“I didn't go back to home room, I went to Mr. Meecham's office. He's the dean. The one in charge of suspensions. So I walked in and God! ... It was beautiful. I thought he was going to have a heart attack. ... Wish he had, too. Me and Mr. Meecham never got along too good.”

“So okay,” I continued, “good thing nobody swiped your school clothes. ... But I'm guessing no one did. So...”

“I gave them to Carlie,” explained Earl. “So I just went back, he handed them to me and said he'd be seeing me later and-”

“He walked outside still dressed like a bunny,” finished Carlie. “It was funny as hell, because every class he went by, he stuck his head in and waved goodbye. Dressed up like a bunny!”

“So it wasn't like I was going to be back, you know. Not last year, so why shouldn't I say goodbye?”

“So how did you get home?” I wondered.

“Put my school clothes back on and started thumbing. Didn't take me long at all.”

But I still had another question. Well, aside from if he really and truly thought it was performance art when he started running around Oxmar in that suit, only I had a feeling that he'd still insist it was, so... “Well, okay, one final question, then. How did you happen to come by that suit in the first place?”

“Day before Easter – this year, I mean – Rev. Henrickson decided to have an Easter Egg Hunt and he asked me to be their Easter Bunny. ... I think he's weird.

“Well, he's probably harmless. But, anyway, he said I could keep the suit until next Easter.”

“Except now it's at the bottom of the lake,” I reminded him.

Earl shrugged. “I'll tell him I'm sorry, but once I explain how I almost drowned, he'll probably say he's glad I didn't.”


I figured I'd toss in the section above because the truth is, until we finally reached Vegas, our road trip wasn't all that exciting.

Except for us being dressed up in our costumes at the North Dakota-Montana state line... that was at least interesting... I thought...

And of course when Carlie and Earl decided to get naked... that was interesting... except for the rest of us thinking that our trip was about to end before we'd barely started... which was interesting all right, but not in a way you'd really want it to be. After I'd told my mom how nice Carlie was, he's about to be arrested for indecent exposure, that's what I was thinking, but...

Okay, we also managed to make getting ourselves decent again (in the creek) into something else entirely, but after that we were almost always on our best behavior. Boringly so. And beyond that, it's not long until Interstates are boring, especially in the middle of the night. Even our music almost became boring, and that included our hastily put-together rabbit-themed CD.

We had to hurry because of them deciding to leave Monday evening, so we didn't even have a full CD, and two of our tracks turned out to be mistakes. At first, we almost liked “The Rabbit Song” courtesy, John Lydon, but it wasn't long until we'd changed our minds. (You're probably aware of this, but in case you're not, John Lydon is better known as Johnny Rotten.)

But an ever bigger mistake was Schnuffle Bunny. What were we thinking?

Well, I'm not sure, but if nothing else, “The Snuggle Song” is one hell of a jarring contrast to Johnny Rotten.

(I'll save the rest of our rabbit-themed cuts for this chapter's postscript, though. I figured I should at least warn you.)

But okay, camping out in Yellowstone was fun. It was the first time me and Stephan had a chance to sleep in our new tent, and we thought it was it was pretty cool. There were no earth tremors while we were there. (We'd checked before leaving – just out of curiosity – and in June there were 77 quakes in Yellowstone. Nothing major, though, the largest was a 3.3.)

So we googled that too. “How serious is a 3.3 earthquake?” Not very. One answer was that it would be similar to a large truck passing by. Almost like being on I-15 from Provo to Salt Lake City. But that was because Elliott was suddenly being responsible and not exceeding the posted speed limit, which had been 75, only it dropped to 65 all the way into Salt Lake. So we experienced several minor earth tremors en route, because no one else was paying any attention to that speed limit and that included the trucks. PHOOMPH! PHOOMPTH! PHOOMPTH! Going by the Richter Scale, there were several 4-0 to 4.9s. Noticeable shaking of indoor items, rattling noises. Significant damage unlikely. Unless of course, we were run over. In that event, I'm guessing it would have been a 9.0.

But once we were in Salt Lake Elliott thankfully decided to go with the flow of traffic again which by then was around 80, and he explained that for awhile he just wanted to see if it was actually possible to stay within the posted speed limit. (Then later, he admitted the truth, which was that he was trying to get even with Carlie for almost scaring him to death.) (And if I can gauge Carlie's reaction by mine, Elliott got his revenge.)

And we'd get ours later. Even if Carlie and Earl got around to it first, we'd think of something, Stephan and I, but...

But first things first, because even though I didn't find a pair of video glasses in Salt Lake, Stephan found something else while we were in a Walgreens, a... um... (deep breath)...

Well, it was a combination douche, enema and water bottle system. I didn't know anything about it, I didn't have a clue as to just how perverse Stephan could be until we were about to walk out the front door. That's when he slapped the side of his head and said, “I forgot something!” He hadn't, but he didn't want Elliott, Carlie and Earl to know anything about it. (And I appreciated that.) But after saying that we'd meet them at the car in just a minute, he pulled me back inside and after buying five boxes of Russell Stover chocolates (our cover)...

“See,” he said excitedly, “it'll hold two quarts. And let's see... it has a stopper and a hook... we'll have to hang it somewhere and... tubing... we'll definitely need some tubing... shut off clamp... yep, we need that too... so what do you think?”


Carlie and Elliott's behavior was kinky only because they thought it was. Well, I thought this was and I was blushing all the way out to the car. I could feel it. But if the rest noticed that I was suddenly acting a little strange, they never let on. Maybe they thought I felt awkward about us buying everyone chocolates, I really don't know. But I kept thinking about that enema bag - that douche bag - all the way to Vegas and once there (at around 4am) while everyone else was oohing and aahing at the lights, I was probably still blushing.

But more often than not, I was also stiff, because this was kinky! Well-bred 13-year-old boys aren't supposed to give themselves enemas!

“So,” said Stephan that afternoon, “you'd rather be all stopped up. Ever think about that?”

Yeah, well, well-bred boys don't ever mention that they're... constipated... even if they are... and I wasn't... by the way, but...

I had to admit that it was logical. (And as soon as I did admit it, I felt another twinge. If I'd been as far gone as Elliott, I think I would have squirted.)

But that's okay, because what I was thinking was: he was going to be on the receiving end first. I could just picture it. He'd be in the tub.

So okay, first we had to get ourselves a motel room, and to do that I probably needed to call my mom several hours in advance so she could reserve a room. If you're our age, even if you have the money, lots of motels aren't going to let you get a room on your own. It sucks.

And of course we'd have to tell the others that we were about to take another really big step... really really big, so we needed privacy...

With a tube stuck up my butt? Yeah, we definitely want that to be private.

But right, Stephan was going to get his first. And I could still just picture it. He'd be in the tub on his back, then he'd pull his knees up until they were about even with his face, then I'd rub some of that goop into his hole, then after filling the enema bag with warm, soapy water...

I could just picture it.

And knowing that I'd soon enough be in that same very open position myself...

If I'd been as far gone as Carlie, I would have lost it. (And there really was a small preliminary squirt.)

But we all poop. Miss Universe poops. The Pope poops. Everybody does it, and it always comes out from the same place. Or, at least, I sure hope so, but...

We already knew from some of our earlier prepping with a candle (that would never be seen again), that every once in awhile there would be... some other stuff.

So... (another deep breath)... the less, the better. There. I've said it (almost) and it made perfect sense.

But I'm still blushing.

Although I guessed sharing it with Stephan would help tremendously. If he wasn't horribly embarrassed, then I'd only be a little, and it would be well worth it.

I was sure of it.


Carlie's mom works long hours, so after she asked off Friday just so she could take us all to Lake Mead, me and Stephan were hardly in a position to say we'd already made other plans.

We were planning on riding all the coasters atop the Stratosphere, though. The Stratosphere Hotel & Casino. At the top, (more than a thousand feet up), there's Insanity, X Scream and Big Shot. Insanity dangles you over the edge, a sixth of a mile above the ground below, so that's definitely scary. X Scream is like a big see-saw, but again, you're see-sawing over the edge of the stupid hotel. So if something goes wrong, it's a long way down.

And then there's Big Shot. You're strapped into a chair with your legs dangling and then they shoot you straight up the steeple at the top of the building. 160 feet in two seconds. That's about four Gs. Then once at the top... free fall. Negative Gs. Then you'll promptly be shot back up. Then it's free fall time again... and remember, all this is taking place about a fifth of a mile above The Strip, but...

Instead of all that, we were on a tour boat. All afternoon!

But oh well, Carlie had a nice visit with his mom and the scenery was nice. The picnic was nice. Swimming was nice. It was all very nice, and by the time we were back at her place, we were totally wiped out. We camped out in the den downstairs that night, so there was no hanky panky.

But then I don't suppose there would have been any of that even if Carlie had come out to his mom.

Although I suppose...

Well, expecting no hanky panky at all would be a bit much, but it never went beyond some quiet talking and snickering. That, and we finally talked Elliott into letting us see pics of his Markus. He had several on a memory stick.

What piqued our interest was Elliott saying that Markus had an elephant dick. So of course we were wondering if by that, he meant that it was gargantuan.

No, that wasn't it, said Elliott. (But I'd say it's at least above average. I'm guessing more than six inches and fairly big around.)

But the “elephant dick” description came from the fact that it looked to be bigger around at the end, and he had a short, sort of rolled-up foreskin, so in way, it looked like an elephant's trunk, you see. Soft, that's how it looks. But when it's hard, it looks pink and shiny. That and a bit large, but not so much like an elephant's trunk any more.

So I hope Elliott can work things out with Markus, because he's also good-looking.


Oh, and one other thing: I finally found some i-Kam video recording glasses. Yes!

I could imagine all sorts of things that I'd soon be recording.

More rabbit-themed music, some better than others.

Panic At the Disco... “Mad As Rabbits”.

Jefferson Airplane... “White Rabbit”. Of course.

Chas & Dave... “Rabbit.” It's hard to get it out of my head, sometimes.

Rabbit In The Moon... “Belly Dancer”. So. This is what it's like being high.

Eddie Rabbitt... “Drivin' My Life Away”. Yes, it's a stretch, but we were in a hurry.

Dirty Little Rabbits... “I'm So Beautiful”. But at least I'm still humble.

Flanagan & Allen... “Run Rabbit Run” It's a change of pace. Like you would not believe. .

Eminem... “Run Rabbit Run” It's not another version of the above.

But then if it was... and it was by Eminem...

Guess I'd have to use the word surreal again.

Copyright 2010: all rights reserved. Please do not reprint, repost or otherwise reproduce this or any part thereof anywhere without my written permission.

J.J. Janicki