Date: Tue, 26 Aug 2008 15:19:43 -0500 From: Andy Smith Subject: Asleep on the Beach Chapter 19 Asleep on the Beach Chapter 19 A Turning Point Disclaimer: Please be advised that under aged youths are advised to not read this material; There are sexual encounters ahead by youngsters in this story. If this offends you, perhaps you should not have read this far, and I certainly would not advise continuing further. Everyone else is welcome. Writer's Note: A couple of editorial notes are necessary here -- Larry is, of course, Liam's father and not Leslie's boss (that would be Robert -- who was also Leslie's old college roommate...and more). Second, Lenny called Brant first, as he was just too excited to wait for Brant to call. I'm not sure how/why I messed that up, sorry if I threw you a curve-ball there. Oh, and this last -- Brant is really Brant, and not Brand; that error is simply due to poor editing skills on my part. Such trivial issues drive me insane when I read them in other's work and so now, I apologize to all those poor guys whom I have so verbally abused in the past over such dastardly transgressions. Ummm...I think that is all (outside a plethora of typo's and such over the course of approaching 20 chapters). Still, please let me know when I am transgressing your sensitivities. We've come too far to let little things upset the apple-cart, so let me know if I am annoying you in some regard and we'll all have a chuckle (or cursing spree)! On a more serious note: This chapter is a disturbing chapter, and I apologize up front for what you are about to endure. Please know that this part of the story had to be told. So, proceed with caution. Any comments are welcomed: prompt and courteous replies from: andyoutwest@live.com Oh -- Thanks Arjan, for the encouragement and support! You've been very helpful! Prologue Not this time...keep reading... Chapter 19 A Turning Point Lenny was watching out the living room window with the curtain pulled slightly apart as he waited for Brant to show up. He immediately recognized Brant's family car as it wheeled into the driveway at twenty minutes after three in the afternoon. Before the car had been put into park and had stopped rocking from the change of motion, Lenny was out the door and opening the passenger's door where Brant was anxiously attempting to disengage himself from his seatbelt. The boys each wanted to hug one another as the door flew open and Brant extricated himself, but the normal awkwardness of pubescent boys kicked in and they just exchanged knuckle raps and mumbled "hi's!" instead. The sudden shyness was awkward and foreign to Lenny. Normally, he was the one to quickly encompass what was going on in a given situation then he would proceed with a course of action indicative of a boy without a care in the world. So, he was so distracted by this turn of emotions to which he didn't seem to have a ready answer; Brant seemed to be suffering from the same malady. Brant's Mom piped up about then, holding her hand over her cell phone, and quickly got their minds at ease by telling them, "Why don't you boys get Brant's bag and go inside out of this heat!" "Sure!" Brant exclaimed after snapping out of the spell he was experiencing. "Dad just popped over to the grocery to get more soda and chips. He said it looked like it was going to be a long `guy's' night in!" While thus declaring, he grabbed Brant by the shirt dragging him to the back door of the car so they could get the back-pack Brant had stuffed with his things. Both boys were giggling and jostling between themselves as they pulled the bag out of the back-seat and closed the door. Brant's Mom had rolled the passenger window down and both boys leaned into the window for the ritual last minute instructions they both knew were inevitable. Of course, they had to wait for her to get off her cell phone. She seemed to Lenny as the type of woman who always had her ear on the phone. Lenny paused briefly to consider if she was also the type of woman who didn't pay enough attention to what was going on around her because she was so self-absorbed. These thoughts were, of course, not so concisely fleshed out in his twelve year-old mind, but the troubling thought had presented itself. This also invoked a memory and thought of his own mother -- would she be like this? Would she be "aware" of him? Or, would she be this kind of mother? A shudder passed through him involuntarily as he shook those perplexing thoughts away. Brant noticed though; and on some level he picked up on exactly what Lenny must have been thinking about his mom with her talking incessantly on the phone. There was no way for Brant to know about Lenny's mom just yet, even though he did wonder about why he never saw her, or why Lenny never talked about her. They hadn't really known each other long enough for all that yet. But Brant was excited that problem maybe just about to go away. He liked Lenny; he felt a connection to him, but wasn't sure why or how yet. He was so excited that Lenny wanted to spend time with him though -- this was going to be a fun day! Looking at Lenny, and speaking around her cell phone Brant's Mom said, "I think I should wait here until your Father gets here...I am not so sure it's a good idea to leave you two alone." Lenny wanted to tell her that his dad went to work every single day and left him alone (completely alone and all by himself) all the time, but he decided that wouldn't make the reserve she was experiencing any better. "Oh, Mooooom," whined Brant. Lenny thought he was lovely when he did that, and he giggled at the tone and expressions coming from Brant. Not to worry though, as no sooner had the whine level increased a couple of more degrees, Leslie pulled his Jeep into the drive beside Brant's mom. They exchanged waves then Leslie made his way out of the jeep and over to talk to Brant's mom. Ceasing on the escape possibility, Lenny stepped back from the window, pulling Brant away with him. "Come on!" he cried with urgency to Brant, "let's get the heck outta Dodge while we can!" Both boys bounded away from the car as the adults laughed at them and resumed their parental conference. Rushing into the house, both boys giggled all the way into the kitchen where Lenny dug them out a coke and then they headed to Lenny's room. "This is going to be soooooo cool," cried Lenny as he pushed Brant into the doorway. As soon as he got beyond the door himself he spun and closed the door, and thumbed the lock. Turning to face Brant he said, "I don't have to lock it...Dad won't come in...but I like it locked anyways. When I'm here all by myself sometimes I get scared of the noises and I lock the door just to make sure." Brant had found the bed and had made himself at home; he was lying back on the bed and had pulled himself up onto the pillows with his hands behind his head -- elbows pointing in opposite directions. He had put the coke on the nightstand beside the bed. Brant had a very mischievous grin on his face and the two boys stared at one another for quite a long time, studying one another -- trying to decide their next moves. "Thanks for having me over," Brant said, ignoring Lenny's comments about the locked door. The fact that the door was locked actually made Brant a bit more excited about what might possibly be about to happen. "Man, I've been so excited, waiting for today to get here!" Lenny came over and hopped on the bed pulling one knee up and turned to look at the dark haired boy laying on his very own pillow. "Yea, me too! What took you so danged long to clean up a crappy old garage?" He playfully backhanded Brant on the thigh as he teased him...only he left his hand beside Brant's leg, feeling the warmth. Subconsciously, Lenny licked his lips and allowed his hand to "twitch" against the smooth skin of his friend. "I know, I thought I'd never get done too! Every time I came in and told Dad I was finished he gave me more stuff to do. I think he was messing with me `cause he knew how much I wanted to get outta there." Lowering his arms from behind his head he crossed his hands on his abdomen for a moment, then let them slip down to his sides. This of course cause the boys hands to come into contact. Lenny pulled his hand away at first touch, afraid he'd overplayed his rues at touching Brant's leg. But Brant quickly reached for Lenny's hand and held it in his own. Both boys looked directly into one another's eyes. Both of them could feel their breathing increase and hearts racing. A sense of foreboding and dread in Brant's mind still couldn't be easily pushed aside. The dark secrets of his own sexual desire...and the humiliation he felt at what was between he and his brother was hard to compartmentalize. He was struggling to focus on the possibility of friendship here in the present...literally "AT HAND," and the fear of rejection should he be making a mistake with Lenny. What if Lenny found out what his own brother had made him do? Brant swallowed exaggeratedly, the action caused a chain reaction all the way down his body, each part of his body responding to the stimulus from the adjoining part -- ultimately his abdomen rose and fell with it's role in the chain of action...both boys seemed to be transfixed. Lenny's eyes watched the whole of Brant's body and a small groan escaped his lips as his eyes wandered down Brant's body and stopped to linger at the boy's crotch. What his eyes saw that made Lenny groan was the tent beginning to develop in Brant's shorts. Lenny licked his lips again, blushed, then quickly pulled back slightly. "Ummm...do you wanna play some video games, or something?" Lenny quickly offered, trying to divert attention from the tent in his own shorts. He was excited at Brant's touch -- holding his hand, but somehow he was still all flustered inside. His heart was skipping beats! "Ssu..sure," Brant stuttered, belatedly but quickly pulling his hand away from Lenny's. He was afraid that Lenny didn't want him to touch like that...but Lenny was still beaming a radiant smile at him...didn't seem to be mad...was he dreaming? Lenny bounced up, turned on the TV set and video game, and tossed one set of controllers to Brant who had by then made his way to sit on the floor leaning against the bed for support. Lenny settled in beside him, very closely beside him...no...VERY closely beside him -- so much so the boys had difficulty working the controllers and were forced to jostle each other for a dominant position to be victorious at the game...no self-respecting twelve year-old was just gonna let the other guy win! Eventually, their playfulness got the best of them and the video game became less and less important. Lenny would lean heavily into Brant causing him to foul-up; and Brant would retaliate at Lenny's turn by pushing and head-butting Lenny's shoulder. Before either of them knew it, they were into a full on wrestling match. One would be on top, then the other would flip the advantage. Bodies pressed, flesh grabbed, breathing out of control...boyhood parts rising. Lenny ended up on top of Brant, and felt himself drawn to Brant's full and luscious lips. Lenny was about to burst out with a confession of liking Brant when Brant spoke first, "Lenny...ummm...am I thinking right? Ummm... I mean, do you...ummm...are you like okay with...with..." Brant was struggling with the words, he was afraid to just jump out there and ask Lenny if he liked boys...like him...but also so badly wanting this to mean more then just buddies having a sleep over. In answer to Brant's pitifully managed question Lenny leaned heavily across Brant's body, placing one hand on either other side of Brant, causing his upper body to be somewhat over Brant, and his lower-half pressed hard into Brant's crotch. Lenny could sense the radiant heat coming off Brant's body, could feel the sensual closeness of their bodies...in fact, Lenny could feel the sexual tension in the room. "Brant," he said in his incredibly husky and sexy voice, "I like you. I wanted you to come over because I like you." Lenny squeezed his hands and forearms together into a semi-hug of Brant's abdomen, all the while feeling himself drawn lower and lower toward cherry lips. Brant's hands found themselves holding Lenny's heaving sides -- the warmth of Lenny's body creating even greater lust in his own boyhood region -- the sexuality palpable. Both boys knew this was sexual -- this touch, this position they were in -- this wasn't the way twelve year-old boys played...something was happening between them. Lenny hoped he was confirming what he himself had picked up on from Brant; desperately hoping Brant was gay. Brant was awash with emotion -- need, lust...fear...but felt he was at a crossroads with no wrong turns. Somehow he felt -- no - he knew this boy was safe: He felt it in his heart. This was the boy; the boy he'd been secretly wanting. His hands held the flesh of the boy of his dreams. Brant could feel the subtle strength beneath his fingers...all these feelings, thoughts, emotions, and tactile stimuli was about to overwhelm him. And both boys minds were racing as fast as their heartbeats. Oddly (or maybe not so oddly) both were remembering the night at the Liam's pool and seeing each other's boners under their respective swimsuits. The boy-on-boy flesh-to-flesh contact had caused them both to get stiffies that night, and both boys KNEW the other boy saw it between them. When they parted that night, both had eagerly accepted an invitation to get back together when they could be alone. All this time since that hour both had been daydreaming of a chance to see the other naked...to touch...to...to do what boys want to do to each other. Brant struggled to sit up, and nearly made it, except Lenny didn't back-up to give him room to adjust causing both boy's bodies to bump awkwardly into one another. Lenny licked his lips yet again and let his eyes wander to Brant's lips -- he saw that Brant had licked his own lips, for they were deliciously wet, and looked so soft...so close...as his own eyes closed at the approaching wet lips, the next sensation Lenny knew was their first tender kiss. Incredible softness was what Lenny felt. A taste...a somewhat familiar taste...the taste of human lips. It was brief...agonizingly brief...but oh so powerful to both boys. Brant shuttered involuntarily, a whimper escaped and he leaned in for more. On cue, both boys sat up straighter and wrapped arms around each other and delved into a full blown passionate kiss. Hands rubbed and caressed hot and sensual skin over the thin fabric of their tee shirts. Lenny reached up to run his fingers through Brant's dark curls, and Brant allowed himself to mimic Lenny's lead by gently caressing Lenny's silky fine blonde hair. "Damn," Brant said as he pulled away slightly, reeling from their very first passionate kiss. "Oh my god...Did we just???" Lenny snickered at seeing Brant so flushed with passion and breathing so raggedly. How well he knew exactly what Brant was feeling. His first kiss with Liam was exactly like that...but this wasn't bad! Tentively, Lenny placed his hand on Brant's thigh and rubbed his fingers in circles, slowly inching his way up the warm leg towards his shorts, then slightly beneath the hem of Brant's shorts. Both boys eyes were riveted on each other as Lenny began this exploration, both knowing what Lenny's goal was. A knock at the door caused both boys to nearly die of embarrassment and guilt. Which one was blushed the reddest was a tossup; they scrambled to separate to a normal boy-safe distance, each forgetting the door was locked. "Boys," Leslie called from behind the door, "Come on down and let's get diner ready." "Okay, Dad," Lenny hollered back. He looked over to Brant who has stupefied about what to expect, both broke out into fits of laughter at their near miss. "Come on, Brant," Lenny said as he reached for Brant's hand and pulled him up off the bed. "Dad makes THE best spaghetti in Texas! I'm starving!" "Cool! My fav!" Brant exclaimed as the rushed together towards the door. Just as Lenny reached to un-lock the door, Brant reached for his hand and turned Lenny to face him. "Lenny," he said in a whispered and hushed tone, "I...ummm...thanks." "For what?" Lenny asked, cocking his head in a manner fitting curiosity. "Ummm...for not...ummm...like...freaking out back there when we...ummm..." "Kissed?" Lenny asked -- it was more of a statement than a question. "Yes." Lenny smiled, leaned in and kissed the dark curly haired Brant tenderly full on the lips. "No probs!" he smiled as they separated. "I've been wanting to kiss you since I saw you on the beach." Brant's turn to cock his head inquisitively. Lenny giggled at the puppy-dog nature of Brant's gesture and opened the door and drug Brant out into the hallway. "Last one there sucks eggs!" Lenny called back to the lagging Brant -- they raced down the hall and stairs and fell in a heap at the bottom of the stairs. Leslie happened to be there and was smiling with amusement at the boyish playfulness between them. To himself Leslie thought about how glad he was that Lenny was finally opening up and making friends. This boy Brant was more appropriately Lenny's age and size. He felt a bit of relief that the two seemed to genuinely enjoy the other's company. Chuckling out loud at the theatrics both boys were making to best the other and beat the other to the kitchen, Leslie reached down and lifted both boys -- one under each arm. They were all laughing and giggling as Leslie made his way to the kitchen. Pulling both boys tightly to his sides, he squeezed the three of them past the door opening and exclaimed, "and it's a tie!" It took several minutes to get the spaghetti cooked and ready to eat, and there was quite the mess to clean up after three boys tackled cooking dinner. Over dinner Leslie got to asking all sorts of questions of Brant, his family, background, and all sorts of stuff adults want to know about kids. Brant was extremely polite, despite Lenny working hard to keep interrupting and distracting Brant's answers. Several piercing daggers were shot from Brant's eyes to ward off further interference from Lenny's antics...all of which were totally ignored by Lenny, of course. Leslie was amused and laughing all evening as the boys struggled to best the other with crudeness and jocularity. Finally, after all had been satisfied they couldn't possible eat anything else, Leslie directed the boys to clear the table and clean the dishes and kitchen before heading up to Lenny's room to watch the DVD's he'd rented for their evening. Leslie retreated to his study to work on homework and left the giggling and happy boys to their cleaning. After nearly half an hour, Leslie headed back to the kitchen to get a fresh glass of iced-tea (the national drink of Texas), and instinctively stopped just outside the doorway as the boys seemed unusually quiet, given the roughhousing they'd been doing all evening since called downstairs. Peering around the corner, Leslie discovered why they were so quiet -- the boys were embraced in what could only be described as a full on kiss. Leslie cleared his throat and stepped into the room. The boys jumped apart trying to straighten their clothes. Both boys seemed to be getting aroused by the earlier contact...but that problem was obviously rapidly deflating. Leslie chuckled internally at the boys' discomfiture, but came on in and made his glass of tea anyway, letting the boys have a brief moment to get their bearings. Both boys were particularly, and obviously embarrassed when Leslie turned and leaned against the counter facing them. With a mischievous grin on his face, Leslie said to Lenny, "I'm glad you and Brant are getting on so well..." Lenny blushed and maintained his guilty look. "But...perhaps you two need to take all that fun stuff upstairs!" "Dad!" Lenny protested. Leslie held his hands in a defensive manner, "Don't jump on me...I'm not the one down here playing suck-face and getting caught!" "Ahh, Jeez Daddy!" Lenny exclaimed and he tossed a dish towel at Leslie who caught it and chucked I back at his mortified son. Brant slapped his hands over his eyes and darted from the kitchen. The bantering back and forth between father and son dissipated at the sudden departure of the newcomer to their playfulness. Both looked at each other; Lenny had a look of panic. "Opps!" Leslie said, "I'm sorry Bud, I wasn't thinking about him being afraid of me knowing...let's go calm him down." He took Lenny by the hand and the two took off after the phantom boy. They found Brant bunched up like a frightened kid on the couch, all curled up in a ball with his knees pulled up under him and his arms wrapped around his legs, his face buried in his arms and knees and obvious tears of fright and frustration. The tenderness of the moment overtook Leslie as he paused coming into the room. Lenny had pulled away from Leslie's grip and had rushed to encircle the dark-haired boy in his arms in a protective, comforting way. Drawing a deep breath, Leslie walked over to the boys and squatted down in front of Brant and softly patted the frightened boys shoulder and upper arm. He listened to the sobs and sniffles quietly coming from the lad, and quietly cursed his own insensitivity for hurting the boy's feelings, or frightening the boy. "Brant, I'm sorry, partner," Leslie said quietly to the weeping boy. "It's okay, Brant. I know about Lenny, and I just assumed you knew I did too...I really didn't mean to frighten you, Buddy." He didn't try to force the boy to look up, like he might have done is own boy, but rather just continued to pat the boy soothingly on the shoulder and wait for him to grasp that things were as bad as they'd get. Both boys were crying, and had begin a gentle rocking motion. Lenny had not loosened his strong gripping hug, and Brant had not loosened his grip of his own knees, nor lifted his head. An idea came to Leslie as he looked at the boys. "Brant, does anyone know how you feel... about ...boys?" Leslie asked in a very gentle tone. Brant nodded his head back and forth a couple of times nearly imperceptibly. Leslie sighed, and carefully pondered his next words. "Well," he said to the beleaguered boy after a few moments more of thoughtfulness, "I'm not going to tell anyone anything... this isn't my business or place to tell. Brant, I won't tell your parents what I saw in here tonight. I promise. Besides, what did I see? Not much really." He patted the boys knees this time, and finally Brant looked up at Leslie with tear streaked face upturned. "Thanks," Brant said, tearfully, as he moved his arm to wipe his face on the shoulder sleeve of his tee shirt. "My parents don't know...about me...I don't think anyways. I just don't know for sure how they would react if they did know...I doubt they'd like it much though." He sniffed loudly. Leslie reached up and ruffled the dark curls of the boy's hair, and noticed himself how soft and silky they felt. He felt a twinge of guilt at the thought, and pushed it from his mind. "Want to talk about it?" Leslie offered the boy. Brant shrugged. Lenny leaned up and kissed the boys cheek, and turned to sit beside him, sliding his left arm around the boy as he settled in. Brant took a deep breath, held it a moment, then slowly exhaled loudly as he tried to re-gain his composure. "It's okay, Son," Leslie told the dark haired Brant. "I know this stuff is hard to deal with. Why don't you let me talk just a bit...if you want to say, or ask anything, I'm all ears." Brant nodded in agreement and settled back into Lenny's side, the two boys were now holding hands, and Leslie made a mental note that he didn't think the boys realized they were holding hands in front of him at that moment. He let it slide. "I just found out how Lenny feels about boys this summer. I don't know if you know or not, but Lenny's mother died several years ago," Brant took in a sudden breath and looked quickly over at Lenny who remained looking straight forward at his father. Considering the look Brant just gave, Leslie assumed the two friends had not crossed that bridge yet, so he continued. "So, Lenny and I are alone in this together. When...when Lenny told me - I don't think I reacted well...I scared him, and he was afraid I'd hate him over how he feels." Leslie let those comments settle in a moment. "But, I've made Lenny see that I love him...unconditionally. I won't say I totally accept ...no...that's not right..I can't say I totally UNDERSTAND what Lenny is going through...what we are going through...but I know I won't let this come between the two of us. "Does any of that make sense to you?" Leslie asked Brant, who was now looking directly at him; very wide eyed. Brant nodded. "I'm glad Lenny has found a few new friends to share...share his feelings with. I can't possible be the one he talks to about how he feels; I'm his father...and kids aren't exactly comfortable talking to their parents about these kinds of things. Right Lenny?" he asked his son directly. Lenny blushed a tiny bit and shrugged. Leslie reached out and patted his knee then looked back at Brant to continue. "I'm trying to say that if you need someone to talk to about what is happening to you, I'm here. You might not want to talk of these matters with your parents, and I can understand that feeling. I'd tell you that I'd encourage you to open up to them when you finally are able to come to terms with your own thoughts about how you feel. But, I really don't know them well enough to tell you how they'd react to things like this. I CAN tell you, not all parents take it like I have. "Look, let's just start over here and let me say that I'm glad you are Lenny's friend. Okay?" Leslie said as he smiled at the boy. Brant returned the smile timidly and snuggled over into Lenny for a moment. Staring straight ahead, Brant said, "Umm...Mr..." Leslie interrupted him quickly and said, "Leslie, call me Leslie." "Thanks...umm...Les..Leslie," Brant struggled to get it out, not being used to calling adults by their first names, but obviously a little relief that Leslie was being cool. "I...ummm...can I as...ask you a question? No, I mean...ummm...can I tell you something?" "Sure, Bud, tell me anything you want...ask me anything you need to too," Leslie re-assured the struggling pre-teen. "Well...see...my brother, Will, you met Will at the Neilson's the other night...remember?" he looked quizzically at Leslie and waited for a look of recognition and a nod from the adult before proceeding. Sighing deeply, Brant continued, "Well...I...I just need to tell someone," again he looked at Leslie for approval to continue. Leslie patted him on the leg and nodded for the boy to keep going. "Will makes me do things to him...terrible things...things that are gross...that I don't want to do...to my own brother." Leslie nodded to the boy, and then moved the two boys down the couch so he could sit beside the boy on the opposite side of his son. Gently, he pulled the boy over to his chest and kissed the top of his head. Brant heaved out a deep sigh, his body quivering as he did so; no tears though. As Leslie released his firm grip on the boy, Brant sat back and re-adjusted himself and continued. "Will got mad at me earlier this summer when I told him I wouldn't do that stuff with him no more. He hit me...really hard...he said he would beat the crap out of me until I did it for him again. But I wouldn't do it, so he beat me up. I couldn't tell mom and dad, because Will told me he'd tell them I was lying and that I snuck into his room and sucked him off first...he said they'd call me a fagot and kick me out of the house." Now the tears fell. But Brant was no sissy. He was working hard to maintain his bearing and composure. He wiped at his eyes with the shoulders of his tee shirt again, but finally pulled up the bottom of his shirt to get it done better. Leslie reached over and grabbed a box of tissue sitting on the end-table beside the couch and handed them to the boy. Brant mumbled his gratitude into the tissue as he prepared to blow his nose; and with a fresh tissue wiped his eyes. "I...I like boys," Brant said bravely, looking at Lenny who was sitting tightly beside him, and wiping at his own tears with a tissue he'd gabbed from the box in Brant's lap. "I like boys," Brant repeated, "but it's just too gross to do stuff to your own brother. And, he...he makes me do it, he hits me if I don't and if my teeth...well...he hits me for that too." He sighed again very deeply and drifted into a sober quietness. "Boy," Leslie sighed, "I'm not exactly sure what we're going to do about this one. I'm glad you told me...we'll figure something out, Brant. I want you to know that I'll help you anyway I can." Leslie this time reached out and softly touched the side of Brant's face. He could feel the dampness of the recent tears, the softness of his skin. Sitting this close, Leslie could see the dusting of freckles under the boys eyes and across his nose. Leslie knew the beauty of the boy, and could see why his own adorable boy could want to kiss this one. A flash-back to a tender time from his own childhood flashed across his mind...but as with the other inappropriate thought he'd had, Leslie quickly subjugated that thought back to the dungeon of solitary confinement he'd built in his mind for such deviant thoughts. This boy was vulnerable, trusting, and needy. Leslie wasn't about to let some primal thought take him down a slippery slope. All these thoughts transpired in milliseconds, but they still registered on Leslie's mind. With the boy's face in his hand, Leslie focused on the pain in Brant's eyes and said to him... "I want you to tell me exactly what Will has done to you, what he has forced you to do. Don't worry...you won't shock me. But, if I am going to be able to give you good advice, I need to know just how bad this situation really is. Can you tell me?" Leslie rubbed the boys cheek tenderly and looked him directly in the eyes. He tried to portray confidence, compassion, and understanding to the boy through his eyes...but had no way of knowing if the boy was sophisticated enough to grasp this, or if he was even being effective in re-assuring the boy. He suspected that he was, though, because the boy had just confessed a deep secret that obviously had been troubling him for some time now...weeks...maybe months. Brant looked over to Lenny now, and Lenny leaned forward and kissed the boy softly on the lips. It was a sweet kiss, a kiss of solidarity...not necessarily of lust. Looking only at Lenny, the dark curly-haired boy unfolded his story. "Before the school year was over last year...it was still cold outside. One night I came out of the shower and went to my room. I was still drying myself off. Me and Will never bothered much with wearing more'n our boxers upstairs when we were at home. No-one comes up stairs anymore, Mom and Dad just yell at us if they want us or something. Me and Will have different rooms, but sometime he comes into my room and messes with my stuff. He knows it irritates me, but he is bigger and I can't stop him. No way I'm allowed into his room though...he'll beat the crap outta me if I even open the door, much less go inside. Mom and Dad just yell at me if I complain...they tell me I have to grow up and deal with things myself. They say I can't always be a little kid. I have to grow up sometime or the other, they tell me. "But this time, when I came out of the shower, Will was in my room -- sitting at my desk, flipping off my stuff onto the floor. He looked like he'd been there waiting for a while, `cause a lot of my stuff was already scattered off the desk onto the floor. I started to yell at him -- but he threw a spiral notebook at me and told me to shut up. "My towel was around my neck, and that's when I realized I was standing in front of him naked. I went over to get some boxers out of my drawer, but he came over and shoved me onto the bed. I tried to hit him back, but he was too strong for me. His boxers were bulging because his dick was all hard...he had this really weird look on his face. "He had my arm by my wrist, and he pulled my hand toward his boxers and made me feel his hard dick. Before I knew what he was doing, he pulled the front of his boxers under his balls and pulled my face down to his dick. He told me to open my mouth but I shook my head. He hit me with the back of his hand across my head and told me if I didn't he would beat the shit out of me. He said it wouldn't take long, and that he would leave me alone...so to just get it over with. So I did. I put it in my mouth. "It was all hard, but really soft too...I didn't know it was going to be hot. I never knew mine to get hot when I got hard and played with myself. He was a LOT bigger than me too...HUGE...I bet he's five inches! He had let go of my arm by then, and had both hands behind my head and he was forcing me to take more and more of him in my mouth. I gagged and he hit me. He told me he'd knock my teeth out if I did that again, and said he'd do that if I bit him too. "After I learned to breath through my nose, and to just relax a little, I quit feeling like I was going to puke. But he started moving his dick in and out of my mouth...like he was fucking me. I was crying, and that made him mad. He slapped my ears and I thought my head had exploded, I guess I bit down on his dick, because he pulled out of my mouth and pounded on me a couple of minutes. "When he finished beating me up, I thought he was going to leave, but he made me sit back up and put his dick in my mouth again. He told me if I knew what was good for me, I'd figure this shit out and make him feel good. I guess I figured it out, because after a couple of minutes I felt wet slimy stuff all in my mouth. He was groaning and acting all weird, then he pulled out of my mouth, hit me on my face, and pulled up his boxers. He grabbed me by my hair and looked me right in the face. He was looking all wild-eyed, and he scared the shit outta me. He said he'd cut my dick off if I told anyone. He walked out, and I ran to the bathroom to throw-up. I promise I didn't swallow that shit from outta his dick...but I could taste it and it made me vomit. I could taste it for days and days...no matter how much I brushed my teeth." Lenny and Leslie sat silently, tears dripping down their cheeks as they heard the horror unfold. Brant was so distant in his voice as he recalled all those events, like he had un-plugged himself from the reality that the little boy being so abused was actually himself. Leslie shuttered. Moments of silence were followed by Brant's hollow voice. "A few days later, after I came out of the shower again, he was back in my room. Naked this time. On my bed. He told me to shut and lock the door. When I didn't do it right away, he threw my stapler from my desk at me and hit me on the eye. I yelled and he jumped up and came over, hit me on the head, and yelled out the door so Mom and Dad could hear for me to stop being such a pussy and to shut up. He closed the door and pushed me over to the bed. My eye hurt like hell, and it was bleeding a little. I got a tissue and wiped the blood. Seeing my own blood made me start crying, but that made Will even madder at me. "He pushed me down and put my face into my bed and picked my butt up in the air. I asked him what was he going to do, and he just hit me right in the back -- told me to shut the hell up and take it like a man. He put some hand lotion on his dick, I could see him doing it, but I still didn't know what he was doing it for. I could smell the lotion, and knew he'd taken it from Mom's side of the bed...it was the kind she always used. Then...he...he climbed up on my bed behind me and pushed me harder into the bed from behind me. I thought he was just bumping into me to beat me up some more, but I realized he was trying to put his dick into my butt hole. I couldn't think of why he would want to do that. And, I never even thought about what he was doing - that it might hurt. Dumb shit I was, huh. "It hurt alright. But when I screamed again, he hit me and hit me until I stopped screaming. Then he got up and went and found one of my socks off the floor and made me open my mouth. I knew what he was going to do, so I wouldn't open my mouth. But he got on top of me and hit me some more, then he held my head down with his forearm on my neck and held my nose with his other hand until I had to open my mouth. He shoved it in, way in...then hit my head with his fist. He said if I spit it out he'd cut my nuts off. I was crying, it was so hard to breath. I had to force myself to breathe through my nose, just like I did when he had his dick shoved in my throat. "Once he figured out I wasn't going to scream anymore, and had stopped fighting back, he got back into place behind me again. I think most of the lotion got rubbed off in our fight, because it hurt even more the second time he tried to shove his dick in. I cried and bit down on the sock -- he forced it inside. "Once he was all the way in...I could feel his hairs on my butt...he stopped and was moaning and making all kinds of weird noises. After a minute, he started fucking me. Slow at first, but he kept getting harder and faster...until I felt that same slimy shit he put in my mouth going deep inside my bottom. "When he was done, he pulled out of me and slapped my butt so hard he bruised me. I had that bruise on my ass for almost two weeks. It was so hard to keep the guy's at school from seeing it when we went to change at P.E. Thankfully, we don't have to shower yet, so I didn't have to get totally naked. There is no way anyone could NOT have seen that bruise...man...I'd have been in so much shit if that happened. "He walked out of my room, leaving me with my head buried into the bed, and my ass in the air. Before he closed the door, he whispered into the room, `Breath a word of this and your ass is dead.' I turned over on my side and covered up, took the damned sock out of my mouth and cried myself to sleep. "That went on all the way to summer. He would make me suck him, or he would fuck me...or both. I quit fighting back and he quit hitting me. I decided the only way I could survive him until he left for college was to keep my mouth shut and let him do what he wanted." "Oh Brant," Lenny said in his deep voice, he spoke with the innocence of youth, but with the compassion of a friend. "I'm sorry Brant. You didn't deserve that. Why did you finally stand up to him? How did you finally make him stop?" "Ummm...that's sort of embarrassing...I mean...well...Jason and Liam, Will, Daniel, and Ray...they are all buddies, right?" He looked at Lenny for confirmation, which he got. "When summer just got started, and Baseball and all got going, all those guy's all play on the same team...have since before they were our age. Well, after practice, they always go to the beach. A lot of times Ray would make Will bring me along. Mom and Dad told him to do it anyways...but Will would beat me up and make me stay at home. Told me he'd really hurt me if I told on him. But, Will is afraid of Ray. Ray saw him hit me once, and Ray told him he'd rip his heart right outta his chest if he ever saw Will hit me like that again. I guess Will believed him. "Anyway, So, Ray always made a point of making Will bring me along. It pissed Will off at first. He told me if I caused trouble he would deal with me for sure...so I went along, but kept my distance from all of them. One day, at the beach, Ray and me was alone, sitting on our towels. I didn't want to go into the water because my ass was sore...Will had fucked me that morning before baseball practice and I was still really sore. So, I just told everybody I didn't feel good and I wanted to stay on the beach. Ray volunteered to sit with me. Will started to argue, but Ray gave him one of his famous `drop-dead-and-go-to hell' looks - so Will just went into the water with everyone else. "Me and Ray sat there and talked for a long time, then he asked me to come with him to get a drink from the concession stand. I told him I didn't have money, but he said he didn't ask me for money. I told him Will would get mad at me. Ray told me he didn't give a shit if Will got mad or not. I told him `I' certainly cared. Ray said if Will was still hitting me he'd beat the little fucker up personally. I wanted to tell Ray then that getting beaten up was the least of what Will was doing to me...but I knew that'd get Will beaten up -- but me killed...so I just shut up. "We went for a coke, but when we got past where everyone could see us, Ray stopped me and asked me if I liked him. I said "yes," and that is when he leaned down...and kissed me! Oh man! I about died right there in the spot. I was afraid it was a trap. I was afraid he was setting me up for Will to get really pissed at me and then Will would just peal my skin off or something. I freaked and ran away. "Ray chased me down...he is like ten times bigger than me anyways...but he was real gentle with me. He apologized to me and said he wouldn't ever do that again. He said that if I told anyone, he'd deserve it and that he'd figure a way to deal with it. He started to walk away, but I knew then that he was different than Will. He was way bigger than me and could force me to do anything he wanted. But he respected me enough for me to want it, to want to do...stuff...and if I didn't he was man enough to stop. I reached him made him turn around and I kissed him like I was his girlfriend. He started rubbing my dick through my swimsuit, and I came (he taught me what happened later) right there on the beach with him kissing me. "Well, after I knew Ray liked me...I just couldn't do that stuff with Will anymore. I figured the worst Will could do was beat me up...but by then, I knew what all that meant, and I wasn't too afraid of it anymore. I told him one night after my shower when he was there with a big boner, waiting for me...that I wasn't going to do that anymore. He beat the shit outta me, but I still wouldn't do it. He said he would make my life hell...and he has...but I won't suck him ever again...and he ain't never going to fuck me again either." "Goddamnit," Leslie whispered through clenched teeth. He pulled both boys to his chest and held them both. He had no plan, had no idea of what exactly do to...but he knew this little beautiful boy that his Lenny brought home wasn't ever going to be raped again so long as he had breath. Enough was enough...this was enough. ************** Writer's note: I'd like to add a comment here reflective of my own personal views on violence and forced sexuality: I hate it. If you have to force yourself on another individual for any reason (perceived or otherwise), you are...well...I don't want to get into name calling here, as this probably isn't the best forum. I get quite a few emails from some guys who always seem to want to justify sexual force and brutality -- I have lived through the other side of such behavior and thereby don't buy the argument. Some say the "recipient" comes to love the "experience," and so the perpetrator of the violence then becomes the benevolent-one who has sexually fulfilled the other; here in Texas we have a word for such ideas: "Bullshit." Sorry...don't mean to get into sermonizing, I promise to restrain myself from hear-out; but I have a couple of friends out there reading this story and I wanted to speak up for them. Comments welcome! andyoutwest@live.com